@@seattlerunnerI’m in the same situation. After I kindly declined his friendship offer, he has been sending insignificant texts that I’ve been ignoring. Good luck 🤍
I always like to think about the 3 sometimes: 1) Sometimes you won’t get answers. 2) Sometimes you won’t get closure. 3) Sometimes you just got to MOVE ON!🚶
I always say if you don’t get closure know that you don’t need it. The no closure should show you who they are and it will be all the reason to close the chapter.
Exactly! Give yourself that closure it’s much better in the long run. Sometimes you just gotta say I deserve better, move on and let them miss out on you. Eventually you’ll meet someone who’s tired of games too and you’ll build something amazing but until then you can build yourself up.
@@thejessifar4619 take it and make it your own dear and remember... spread this message far and wide as you will always be worth the whole damn sandwich... Luv
@@ripbozo5603yes, this is what I did to a person who dumped me. I blocked him on messenger last yr. But still he kept on watching my story (on fb). Im close to fully blocked him on fb now. REJECTION IS PROTECTION.
Yes breadcrumbs is often underlying issues , they may not be telling you about , it’s also very draining and manipulative behaviour, whether they do it on purpose or not , it’s not good, need to cut them out and regain emotional balance, and if they really want you, then let them make EFFORT.
Had to cuss my Ex-husband out after no contact. You made the decision to get your needs met outside the marriage so continue I don't need or want to talk.
“Hey, I appreciate you miss me. I appreciate this is painful for you, but I need a break from you so I can heal and move on. And these little messages are inappropriate given that you’ve made the decision for us not to be together. If you’re staying true to that decision, then I don’t want to hear from you. If nothing has changed in your decision, then this is unfair and inappropriate for you to be reaching out to me right now.”
Hey, I appreciate you miss me. I appreciate this is painful for you but I need a break from you so I can heal and move on. If you are staying true to your decision, then I don’t want to hear from you. If nothing has changed in your decision, then this is unfair and not right for you to be reaching out to me right now
If they are a narcissist, don’t tell them anything, just block. Otherwise they have power and you are still feeding their ego by telling them you need something to heal. They have you so much silence, time to return the favor and never ever look back.
My ex broke up with me then kept sending texts which were clearly breadcrums, to which I kept replying to. Today, after another insignificant text from her, I told her that we shouldn't keep texting since it makes it harder for me to move on, because I still love her. She got mad and blocked me lol
You literally told her to stop communicating with you and blocking you is how she did that. I don't know why so many people thinking blocking someone means you hate them. Especially since YOU requested no more communication. All she did was listen to your request. Sure, she could have said "Okay" first, but technically she just did what you asked her to do. Or are you really upset that she didn't realize her feelings for you and try to win you back?
@@Jan-f8w They are broken up. Honestly once someone tells you they still love you after a break up, unless you love them too, there is nothing good you can say back to them. Anything you say will hurt. And this person did just ask their ex to stop communicating with them, so I can see why they blocked him. Blocking someone doesn't always mean you hate them. Sometimes it means the temptation to talk to them is still there and blocking is how you protect yourself from reaching out.
They’re thinking this I’ve heard it from every women in this situation , “ one day if it doesn’t work out with my husband / bf / next man I want to come find you .”
This happened to me when I was 19 - I was madly in love with someone who broke it off 3 months after being together - he called me 2 days later and spoke to me like nothing had happened. We saw each other for a whole year afterwards. Turns out he wanted me but also the freedom to do whatever he wanted with anyone else. I cut him off completely after he still could not fully commit to me. He had an entire relationship with someone else afterwards only to come back to me 2 years later. Apparently he had done alot of soul searching and growing up - I believed him and took him back only to find he hadn’t changed for the better but for the worse actually. He really did me dirty. Be really careful with people like this - they need your validation not you. If I could go back to my 19 year old self and give her any advice it would be to completely change numbers the day of the break up and truly heal and move on with my life. The pain these people cause is not worth the 20mins of good feelings they give sparingly
My ex broke up with me. Then after a while she reaches out to me saying she misses me. I say: I miss you too, but you are writing not to be together i don’t see the point. Long story short, she gives me hopes for a couple of days. I tell her how to work together for the relationship. The last day she started accusing me again of things adding new stuff like cheating (there was no words or proof, just inside her head). Last message: don’t reach out to me again, you liar, cheater and abuser. 😂 ok…whatever. I’m gonna heal anyway
OMG!! Same here! I will not be going back to him, but he keeps trying to get me back. I am soon gonna make myself just say how I rlly feel!! I hate that part of me that’s wayyyy to caring! Blessings 🙏
This guy has such great message modeling - really useful scripting. I see so many comments that seem like almost everyone is written off as a "narcissist" and "not worth the effort". IF someone is genuinely a narcissist, then, absolutely no contact is the the rule. However, *most* people are not actually narcissists, just immature and/or traumatized, and I suggest that a single closing communication this well-worded (just once!) will help a LOT of people grow and evolve more quickly and leave less damage to others as they move on in their lives. We are all one big human network and our truth and mercy today can have massive positive impact in the lives of so many generations into the future - more than we could ever imagine. It isn't only about us.
I am the one on the other end, breadcrumbing people. I needed to hear that. I was about to message someone. I asked myself this question and didn't do it. No is still a no and seeking for attention like that is just pathetic and inhuman. Than you for the reality check
The best response is no answer and move on in silence - rebrand yourself, invest more energy and effort in rebuilding your new persona and life leaving behind whatever didn't work out😊. No disrespect,but an ex is like old pointless story wasting your time in just rereading unnecessary pain 😅.
Whoever watches this needs to go to marriage helper. Even if you weren't married, and even if the relationship has ended, the wisdom there is CRUCIAL for your growth in future relationships.
Clean break after an actual break up or divorce is best for both exes. I don't get why decades after choosing someone else anyone would try to compete with my new relationship. Or any of my concerns, really. We ended long ago, let it be. I get to choose my relationships. Others don't.
Narcissists love to send these messages after they break your heart.. ironically I said exactly what Matthew is suggesting, before hearing this video.. The response was a complete temper tantrum and blame shifting - that it was all my fault my ex broke up with me, because I accused my ex of cheating (never mind the fact that my ex did actually cheat several times).. Which was great, because it helped to rid me of any doubts about going complete no contact and blocking my ex altogether... Next month I move from the home we shared, to a new place where my ex doesn't know of.. I will finally be free of any type of contact - or risk there of - in any way, shape, and form!!
My ex closed the deal when he didn’t accept I needed space, that one little “I’m playing our song”, text when I’d just explained I literally couldn’t….
Thank you. I have gone a new contact for a year and four months and I am happy. I don't want to hear nothing else but complete silence. This is a beautiful healing process if you're dealing with any trauma.
EXCELLENT ADVICE🎉 This was my Ex husband after abuse & I wanted to leave & he wasn’t ready! He snared me back 10 more years & it was pure punishment of mental/ verbal abuse as a “how dare I leave when he wasn’t ready yet”. Now he’s tearing me to shreds in court
Wow. I did this year ago with my ex husband and it felt so relieving. I set the boundaries and although he became upset he stopped and I could focus on myself
I saw this video yesterday and took a huge leap and actually said these exact words to my ex who is dating someone else today when she messaged me asking if I was ok. I told her I was good and asked how she was. She said she was hanging in there, I said that’s good. I told her I was going to a movie today at 2, she said by yourself? I said yes unless you wanna come. She said I can’t. I then typed out the message from this video word for word. It was so hard and it hurts very much right now. I know I did what I needed to for my own mental health and I still hold out hope that she will have a change of heart but for now I have to let her feel what losing me is.
I had to tell verbally and then write him in text that I will get a restraining order on him if he tries to reach out ever again… He still keeps writing sometimes form random phone numbers when he’s in a need of a booty call but I just block and delete.
This is actually really helpful. I watched one of your other videos where it says if a guy that you're seeing ghosts you out of the blue and disappears for a while what to say if he comes back, and I responded with that response. He texted me later on and gave me a bunch of excuses but I think I'm definitely going to send this message cuz this is clear cut-and-dry do you want to go right or left there is no moddle path, up, down or other option. Just yes or no. Maybe is dead. It's 2023.
Wow Good Analogy and advice! Now to follow it is another thing. Some of us are so use to nothing so the bread crumbs kind of tempt us to be drawn back in.
Wished I saw this message 2.5 years ago when my non-committal ex of 4 months broke up with me and then 5 weeks later, started to randomly text me again and asked to come out. Even though I had not been physically intimate with him (he made subtle tries) the random contact and hang outs continued for an entire year after the breakup when I finally had enough and told him off. I should have cut contact MUCH sooner. He wasn’t contacting (breadcrumbing) me to get back together, he was doing so for the attention ego boost and was also hopeful of getting me into his bed again and turning me into a f*ck buddy. It wouldn’t surprise me if he was contacting other women at the same time. Sending him this message would have been perfect!
For me: No contact = NO contact. BLOCKED. My ex is toxic. He looks for weakness. The words IF, maybe and the like are red flags to a bull. It’s a challenge. No contact gives him no feedback so he moves on to easier targets. Also, heads up Ladies, he’s out there. He’s handsome. He’s charming. And he’s a snake. But you will never believe me, you’ll have to find out for yourself. Just like I did.
OMG. THIS! Can you make one on an ex pushing friendship on you!? It’s so selfish and unfair. You decided to walk for no good reason other than insecurity and inability to communicate or make space for me in your life….STAND ON IT.
Tell them that you need distance to emotionally move on from the relationship, so you will not be available to chat or spend time together. But if you reach a point where you feel ready to be friends, you will let them know. If they respect that, great! If they try to debate your decision or send little "test messages" to see if you'll respond, ignore them or block. You've made your position perfectly clear, so you don't owe them the same explanation again and again. Unfortunately, some people respond to kind, respectful communication by trying to steamroll you into doing what THEY want. Be clear and upfront once with your words and then be 100% consistent in your actions.
This is what I wanted to say here and see some people already did. Not sure about blocking but, if you think you want to try, try it first unless it is a short term relationship. If it doesn’t work still, don’t give them to time of your day and say nothing anymore! It doesn’t hurt as bad if you tried at least. It is bad if you haven’t tried and start regretting.
Great message. Today, he kept texting meaningless messages, and I finally just had to stop participating in his little game to suck me back into his web. I can not keep doing this to myself.....it's ki[[ing me.
The moment my ex narcissist told me that he wanted to put an end to our relationship except the upcoming traditional wishes of " happy birthday to you", I went into no contact forever.
Oohhh worried about this piece - continuing contact, even verbal is allowing/accepting contact .... can appreciate not wanting to be rude/nasty etc but at this point the message needs to be direct and clear to find other ways to deal with outcomes of the decision (this person is not thinking of your feelings by what they've done)
I don't understand if it didn't work the first time. whats left to hold on too or go back too.. I've never gone back to anyone when it didn't work out... if it didn't work out after my full effort and they don't put the same effort them fuck em.. not good enough
I am soooo striving trying to learn from you all and heal and move on.....I am so stupid for last 27 years of my life keep falling into the trap of running back to these woman who never really wanted me in the first place Truthfully.... oooh GOD and all my friends here ......please....please....please help me to move on..... 😢🔥🚒🔥🇿🇦🔥🚒🔥😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Thank god... I came across these kinda videos... Or else I would have been hoping until he got married ultimately... I blocked him... I really don't want to hear from him now who's not sure about me... He broke up... But he skill kept appearing... But then these videos of Mathew Hussey made me realise he is just wasting my time ...
Yesssss! Standing in my power and actually took back my power and moved 17hrs away from this person…. Gave him 7yrs. The last 4 of it was 😂”this summer” I promise you we will get married… mind you (he would do NOTHING to self discipline himself) nor put in any effort to make things right! And when he gets NASTY! Boooy he was really nasty! He disrespected me all the time, fly out of country with his guy bestfriend “Ricky”, sometimes he would meet up with other females as well without NOT telling me pretending to be working double shifts and over time 😂 etc…. So I decided it was time got everything in order “undercover” told him I wasn’t gonna be here the following year and I did exactly what I said: I MOVED AWAY WITH my son. 😊👏👏👏👏
I like this approach, except for the last part where you’re leaving the door open … this shows you’re willing to accept them back, and they clearly (based on this breadcrumbing) haven’t changed.
Hard to completely get away from when you share children. Ex is getting married in a month and he still sends "I dreamt about you" "This reminded me of you" messages. 🙄 Glad he's someonw else's problem.
Oh i had this conversation this past weekend. I dont think it was breadcrumbing but i know that a pattern in communication was coming about again. So i shut it all down. But i shoukd have said it like this message 😂. Im still working towards being secure. I am working towards intellectually communicatung this way. ❤ It was not received well.
@@LeAnneKlein-q9k You can't always expect a mature reply from an immature person. Now that you've made yourself clear, feel free to block him if he keeps trying to keep one foot in the door.
Trust me girls... Its gets better with time... I would cry every night like a crazy girl... I thought I will never get over it... But what helped me after almost 6 months of crying and falling prey to tinnitus because of all the crying was writing down things that he did wrong on me.... That list helps me a lot and I can move one better when I look at that list...Damn he gave me a substandard tteatment but I was still longing for him.. Gosh now after 2 weeks of not crying over him I feel, gosh what was I even thinking? He is so stupid.
My ex reached out to me today after 16 days of NC. He asked if I'm doing good and to let him know if I'm back (out of town for work). Told him politely that I'm still out and to let me know if there's something urgent. He said there's nothing urgent and Wished me well. I was confused and asked if there's something. He said he just wanted to make sure that I'm okay. I told him what made him think i wouldn't be okay. That i don't live in the past. He reacted with 👏 I'm super pissed and confused. Why would he reach out when he didn't intend to talk.
Its actually worse than a clean break cos it gives false hope
Exactly. My person wants to be friends and I’m just ignoring them until she ever decides she wants a relationship.
@@seattlerunnerignoring her or them?
@@seattlerunnerI’m in the same situation. After I kindly declined his friendship offer, he has been sending insignificant texts that I’ve been ignoring. Good luck 🤍
@@seattlerunner. Don't wait move on with your precious life .
@@seattlerunner hows it going a year later
I always like to think about the 3 sometimes:
1) Sometimes you won’t get answers.
2) Sometimes you won’t get closure.
3) Sometimes you just got to MOVE ON!🚶
Always take 3.) first
4) sometimes you have to run away when they don't wanna let you go?
I always say if you don’t get closure know that you don’t need it. The no closure should show you who they are and it will be all the reason to close the chapter.
Exactly! Give yourself that closure it’s much better in the long run. Sometimes you just gotta say I deserve better, move on and let them miss out on you. Eventually you’ll meet someone who’s tired of games too and you’ll build something amazing but until then you can build yourself up.
Let’s change that to: A lot of times 😉
I cannot live off crumbs. I'm a whole sandwich girl.
Oohhhh yes queen I love thisss!
❤
Good girl.
Permission to use this? 😄
Cuz it’s just too good!
@@thejessifar4619 take it and make it your own dear and remember... spread this message far and wide as you will always be worth the whole damn sandwich... Luv
Don't say anything...block them. Speak ing or write to them and they got what they wanted...attention. They don't even care how you feel or think.
So does this apply for dumpees? If dumpers try reach out?
@@ripbozo5603yes, this is what I did to a person who dumped me. I blocked him on messenger last yr. But still he kept on watching my story (on fb). Im close to fully blocked him on fb now. REJECTION IS PROTECTION.
Yes breadcrumbs is often underlying issues , they may not be telling you about , it’s also very draining and manipulative behaviour, whether they do it on purpose or not , it’s not good, need to cut them out and regain emotional balance, and if they really want you, then let them make EFFORT.
Can you please explain more
YES
@@wandahoward2446they are playing head games. Could be a narcissist. They like to pull the strings on the puppet . Your the puppet my friend
Had to cuss my Ex-husband out after no contact. You made the decision to get your needs met outside the marriage so continue I don't need or want to talk.
“Hey, I appreciate you miss me. I appreciate this is painful for you, but I need a break from you so I can heal and move on. And these little messages are inappropriate given that you’ve made the decision for us not to be together. If you’re staying true to that decision, then I don’t want to hear from you. If nothing has changed in your decision, then this is unfair and inappropriate for you to be reaching out to me right now.”
Hey, I appreciate you miss me. I appreciate this is painful for you but I need a break from you so I can heal and move on. If you are staying true to your decision, then I don’t want to hear from you. If nothing has changed in your decision, then this is unfair and not right for you to be reaching out to me right now
If they are a narcissist, don’t tell them anything, just block. Otherwise they have power and you are still feeding their ego by telling them you need something to heal. They have you so much silence, time to return the favor and never ever look back.
Amen, ignore them, don't respond, and if they don't stop, then BLOCK.
my narcissist is emailing me lol i changed my number
Oh no I just sent the text he said and I feel so mature🤣
Think he is a narcissist my husband omg
@@baybeetinax3may I know where you from? My ex too is like this fvck that lol😊
Either you're there or you're not , there's No In-between.
My ex broke up with me then kept sending texts which were clearly breadcrums, to which I kept replying to. Today, after another insignificant text from her, I told her that we shouldn't keep texting since it makes it harder for me to move on, because I still love her. She got mad and blocked me lol
She sounds like a jerk. You told her you love her and her response was to block you??... You will thank her later for that.😊❤
You’re a loser. Should’ve just blocked her first
She is way too selfish. Move on to a wonderful relationshop with someone who will never disrespect you.
You literally told her to stop communicating with you and blocking you is how she did that. I don't know why so many people thinking blocking someone means you hate them. Especially since YOU requested no more communication. All she did was listen to your request.
Sure, she could have said "Okay" first, but technically she just did what you asked her to do. Or are you really upset that she didn't realize her feelings for you and try to win you back?
@@Jan-f8w They are broken up. Honestly once someone tells you they still love you after a break up, unless you love them too, there is nothing good you can say back to them. Anything you say will hurt. And this person did just ask their ex to stop communicating with them, so I can see why they blocked him. Blocking someone doesn't always mean you hate them. Sometimes it means the temptation to talk to them is still there and blocking is how you protect yourself from reaching out.
I need a loving relationship, not bread crumbing. I save bread crumbs for my dinner recipes, not my romantic relationship. ❤️
😂
Block 🚫 them!
Exactly... on everything
Wow. As a woman I’m not thinking like that. Thank you so much for your perspective as a man.
So, what are you actually thinking?
@@stefanquandt9528the infinite mystery of the female mind
Answer the man, what are you thinking then?
They’re thinking this I’ve heard it from every women in this situation , “ one day if it doesn’t work out with my husband / bf / next man I want to come find you .”
@@stefanquandt9528usually women think: I pour love freely on him, no matter what, because I am love and love is free.
This happened to me when I was 19 - I was madly in love with someone who broke it off 3 months after being together - he called me 2 days later and spoke to me like nothing had happened. We saw each other for a whole year afterwards. Turns out he wanted me but also the freedom to do whatever he wanted with anyone else. I cut him off completely after he still could not fully commit to me. He had an entire relationship with someone else afterwards only to come back to me 2 years later. Apparently he had done alot of soul searching and growing up - I believed him and took him back only to find he hadn’t changed for the better but for the worse actually. He really did me dirty. Be really careful with people like this - they need your validation not you. If I could go back to my 19 year old self and give her any advice it would be to completely change numbers the day of the break up and truly heal and move on with my life. The pain these people cause is not worth the 20mins of good feelings they give sparingly
THAT PART! .
My ex broke up with me. Then after a while she reaches out to me saying she misses me. I say: I miss you too, but you are writing not to be together i don’t see the point.
Long story short, she gives me hopes for a couple of days. I tell her how to work together for the relationship. The last day she started accusing me again of things adding new stuff like cheating (there was no words or proof, just inside her head).
Last message: don’t reach out to me again, you liar, cheater and abuser.
😂 ok…whatever. I’m gonna heal anyway
Probably the things she’s doing. But just deflecting it back to you. Run!
I hope you stayed far away from that one
Uhh YOU saying no proof says a LOT.
Exactly on this day... I needed to hear this.. Just WOW
just send her this message word for word!
Why didn't you come into my life and told me this 3 years ago? Would have saved me a lot of trauma
Healing, reflection, compassion, accountability.. Things that matter.
Have dealt with that for 6 months!! Very insightful!
I’m not good at saying what needs to be said ! ❤
OMG!! Same here! I will not be going back to him, but he keeps trying to get me back. I am soon gonna make myself just say how I rlly feel!! I hate that part of me that’s wayyyy to caring! Blessings 🙏
And they don’t normally respect the boundaries, I unfortunately
This guy has such great message modeling - really useful scripting. I see so many comments that seem like almost everyone is written off as a "narcissist" and "not worth the effort". IF someone is genuinely a narcissist, then, absolutely no contact is the the rule. However, *most* people are not actually narcissists, just immature and/or traumatized, and I suggest that a single closing communication this well-worded (just once!) will help a LOT of people grow and evolve more quickly and leave less damage to others as they move on in their lives. We are all one big human network and our truth and mercy today can have massive positive impact in the lives of so many generations into the future - more than we could ever imagine. It isn't only about us.
It requires a healed person to respond that way.
Maybe. I just figured it to be emotional maturity.
I am the one on the other end, breadcrumbing people. I needed to hear that. I was about to message someone. I asked myself this question and didn't do it. No is still a no and seeking for attention like that is just pathetic and inhuman. Than you for the reality check
Exactly you might as well say your breadcrumbing got scooped up in the dustpan and thrown away long ago😂
The best response is no answer and move on in silence - rebrand yourself, invest more energy and effort in rebuilding your new persona and life leaving behind whatever didn't work out😊. No disrespect,but an ex is like old pointless story wasting your time in just rereading unnecessary pain 😅.
Very well said! 🥰👏👏👏 THIS is what I'm doing now since the start of this year...and I've never been at peace!
Whoever watches this needs to go to marriage helper. Even if you weren't married, and even if the relationship has ended, the wisdom there is CRUCIAL for your growth in future relationships.
Like a boss!!! Handled that shaet. I’m just gonna send him this video. Thank you Matthew!!!!
Clean break after an actual break up or divorce is best for both exes.
I don't get why decades after choosing someone else anyone would try to compete with my new relationship. Or any of my concerns, really. We ended long ago, let it be. I get to choose my relationships. Others don't.
Narcissists love to send these messages after they break your heart.. ironically I said exactly what Matthew is suggesting, before hearing this video.. The response was a complete temper tantrum and blame shifting - that it was all my fault my ex broke up with me, because I accused my ex of cheating (never mind the fact that my ex did actually cheat several times)..
Which was great, because it helped to rid me of any doubts about going complete no contact and blocking my ex altogether...
Next month I move from the home we shared, to a new place where my ex doesn't know of.. I will finally be free of any type of contact - or risk there of - in any way, shape, and form!!
Don't even respond in any way
❤
I agree
I need a break from all this and need to heal and move on
My ex closed the deal when he didn’t accept I needed space, that one little “I’m playing our song”, text when I’d just explained I literally couldn’t….
Thankyou so much. These clarifying messages you share are very helpful as I am moving forward in healing and restoration.
Thank you. I have gone a new contact for a year and four months and I am happy. I don't want to hear nothing else but complete silence. This is a beautiful healing process if you're dealing with any trauma.
Move silently, Folks remember when Flowers bloom they make no noises
EXCELLENT ADVICE🎉
This was my Ex husband after abuse & I wanted to leave & he wasn’t ready!
He snared me back 10 more years & it was pure punishment of mental/ verbal abuse as a “how dare I leave when he wasn’t ready yet”. Now he’s tearing me to shreds in court
So sorry for that
On point message ❤
Wow. I did this year ago with my ex husband and it felt so relieving. I set the boundaries and although he became upset he stopped and I could focus on myself
That was extremely well put together. Damn! Well said sir!
I saw this video yesterday and took a huge leap and actually said these exact words to my ex who is dating someone else today when she messaged me asking if I was ok. I told her I was good and asked how she was. She said she was hanging in there, I said that’s good. I told her I was going to a movie today at 2, she said by yourself? I said yes unless you wanna come. She said I can’t. I then typed out the message from this video word for word. It was so hard and it hurts very much right now. I know I did what I needed to for my own mental health and I still hold out hope that she will have a change of heart but for now I have to let her feel what losing me is.
Excellent advice!
Had to do this a few times - this is why I no longer hope lol
Dont beat around the bush and be nice say what you mean dont mumble tell em to do one its easier👍
I had to tell verbally and then write him in text that I will get a restraining order on him if he tries to reach out ever again… He still keeps writing sometimes form random phone numbers when he’s in a need of a booty call but I just block and delete.
This is actually really helpful. I watched one of your other videos where it says if a guy that you're seeing ghosts you out of the blue and disappears for a while what to say if he comes back, and I responded with that response. He texted me later on and gave me a bunch of excuses but I think I'm definitely going to send this message cuz this is clear cut-and-dry do you want to go right or left there is no moddle path, up, down or other option. Just yes or no. Maybe is dead. It's 2023.
What the hell is a moddle path??
Far far too many words. They know what they did. Dont waste your breath
If it’s not a Fuck Yes, it’s a No.
❤️❤️Thank you Universe for leading me to the right person at the right time! I trust your timing!🕊️🍀
Wow Good Analogy and advice! Now to follow it is another thing. Some of us are so use to nothing so the bread crumbs kind of tempt us to be drawn back in.
Ross and Rachael " we were on a break".
Wished I saw this message 2.5 years ago when my non-committal ex of 4 months broke up with me and then 5 weeks later, started to randomly text me again and asked to come out. Even though I had not been physically intimate with him (he made subtle tries) the random contact and hang outs continued for an entire year after the breakup when I finally had enough and told him off. I should have cut contact MUCH sooner. He wasn’t contacting (breadcrumbing) me to get back together, he was doing so for the attention ego boost and was also hopeful of getting me into his bed again and turning me into a f*ck buddy. It wouldn’t surprise me if he was contacting other women at the same time. Sending him this message would have been perfect!
Gemini? 😂
For me: No contact = NO contact. BLOCKED.
My ex is toxic. He looks for weakness. The words IF, maybe and the like are red flags to a bull. It’s a challenge. No contact gives him no feedback so he moves on to easier targets.
Also, heads up Ladies, he’s out there. He’s handsome. He’s charming. And he’s a snake. But you will never believe me, you’ll have to find out for yourself. Just like I did.
I couldn't have said it better myself
Literally said this to my ex
Then?
OMG. THIS! Can you make one on an ex pushing friendship on you!? It’s so selfish and unfair. You decided to walk for no good reason other than insecurity and inability to communicate or make space for me in your life….STAND ON IT.
Tell them that you need distance to emotionally move on from the relationship, so you will not be available to chat or spend time together. But if you reach a point where you feel ready to be friends, you will let them know.
If they respect that, great! If they try to debate your decision or send little "test messages" to see if you'll respond, ignore them or block. You've made your position perfectly clear, so you don't owe them the same explanation again and again.
Unfortunately, some people respond to kind, respectful communication by trying to steamroll you into doing what THEY want. Be clear and upfront once with your words and then be 100% consistent in your actions.
This is what I wanted to say here and see some people already did. Not sure about blocking but, if you think you want to try, try it first unless it is a short term relationship. If it doesn’t work still, don’t give them to time of your day and say nothing anymore! It doesn’t hurt as bad if you tried at least. It is bad if you haven’t tried and start regretting.
Great message. Today, he kept texting meaningless messages, and I finally just had to stop participating in his little game to suck me back into his web. I can not keep doing this to myself.....it's ki[[ing me.
Thank you. Just needed to know how to say this. 😊
Where do you buy your t-shirts from? Amazing collection, the reason I can't skip your video. ❤
My response to this behavior was "I need to not think about you anymore" and I haven't heard from him since.
The moment my ex narcissist told me that he wanted to put an end to our relationship except the upcoming traditional wishes of " happy birthday to you", I went into no contact forever.
Oohhh worried about this piece - continuing contact, even verbal is allowing/accepting contact .... can appreciate not wanting to be rude/nasty etc but at this point the message needs to be direct and clear to find other ways to deal with outcomes of the decision (this person is not thinking of your feelings by what they've done)
Fantastic advice, many thanks.
I don't understand if it didn't work the first time. whats left to hold on too or go back too.. I've never gone back to anyone when it didn't work out...
if it didn't work out after my full effort and they don't put the same effort them fuck em.. not good enough
I am soooo striving trying to learn from you all and heal and move on.....I am so stupid for last 27 years of my life keep falling into the trap of running back to these woman who never really wanted me in the first place Truthfully....
oooh GOD and all my friends here ......please....please....please help me to move on..... 😢🔥🚒🔥🇿🇦🔥🚒🔥😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Fcuk them 😂😂😂👏👏👏
Guys tend to kinda feel that way more so than women, I think.
Love this… the perfect words and advice I need right now 👌🏻❤️.
Bro love it ❤
Or simply block them and ignore them if you can…
Why block?
Breaking up doesn't hv to be a fight
💯💯💯 perfect timing always 👌🏻 thank youu Matthew! 🙌🏻🙏🏻🕊💕
Well said but in my case he does not deserve any explanation from me.
DO NO CONTACT. BLOCK. MOVE ON.
Why couldn't I have somebody like you
Nice information sir. THANK U SO MUCH SIR ❤❤❤👍👍👍
Well, Damnnnn Matthew! Speaking my whole life ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
Thank god for Matthew, always solid advice ❤
This is what I needed today! Thanks ❤
So true. Happened to me. I had to ask for distance in order to move on.
I'm doing good without waiting for him to call me
Thank god... I came across these kinda videos... Or else I would have been hoping until he got married ultimately... I blocked him... I really don't want to hear from him now who's not sure about me... He broke up... But he skill kept appearing... But then these videos of Mathew Hussey made me realise he is just wasting my time ...
Thank you
Good reminder
It took me way too long to find this answer/approach on my own... then I see this video three weeks later. Ah well, very affirming. 😅
Oh how many men I've been with that I wish would have been man enough to say that to all the exs they were still communicating with.
Thanks for the advice will use it when needed
I wish it could be this easy to tell him
Don't be a simp if she uses that door than theres never coming back move on guyz!!
Or you could just ignore their messages, don't respond, and they will stop messaging you and that will say the same thing but without words.
Yesssss! Standing in my power and actually took back my power and moved 17hrs away from this person…. Gave him 7yrs. The last 4 of it was 😂”this summer” I promise you we will get married… mind you (he would do NOTHING to self discipline himself) nor put in any effort to make things right! And when he gets NASTY! Boooy he was really nasty! He disrespected me all the time, fly out of country with his guy bestfriend “Ricky”, sometimes he would meet up with other females as well without NOT telling me pretending to be working double shifts and over time 😂 etc…. So I decided it was time got everything in order “undercover” told him I wasn’t gonna be here the following year and I did exactly what I said: I MOVED AWAY WITH my son. 😊👏👏👏👏
Those look like different birds, in the next clip. The hawks have black heads
I like this approach, except for the last part where you’re leaving the door open … this shows you’re willing to accept them back, and they clearly (based on this breadcrumbing) haven’t changed.
Hard to completely get away from when you share children.
Ex is getting married in a month and he still sends "I dreamt about you" "This reminded me of you" messages. 🙄 Glad he's someonw else's problem.
Oh i had this conversation this past weekend. I dont think it was breadcrumbing but i know that a pattern in communication was coming about again. So i shut it all down. But i shoukd have said it like this message 😂. Im still working towards being secure. I am working towards intellectually communicatung this way. ❤ It was not received well.
EXCELLENT🎉
His reply was.."Ok, I guess we'll talk later". WTF???
@@LeAnneKlein-q9k You can't always expect a mature reply from an immature person. Now that you've made yourself clear, feel free to block him if he keeps trying to keep one foot in the door.
amazing response
Needed this
Trust me girls... Its gets better with time... I would cry every night like a crazy girl... I thought I will never get over it... But what helped me after almost 6 months of crying and falling prey to tinnitus because of all the crying was writing down things that he did wrong on me.... That list helps me a lot and I can move one better when I look at that list...Damn he gave me a substandard tteatment but I was still longing for him.. Gosh now after 2 weeks of not crying over him I feel, gosh what was I even thinking? He is so stupid.
My ex reached out to me today after 16 days of NC. He asked if I'm doing good and to let him know if I'm back (out of town for work). Told him politely that I'm still out and to let me know if there's something urgent. He said there's nothing urgent and Wished me well. I was confused and asked if there's something. He said he just wanted to make sure that I'm okay. I told him what made him think i wouldn't be okay. That i don't live in the past. He reacted with 👏
I'm super pissed and confused. Why would he reach out when he didn't intend to talk.
Block. Block. Then block again.
Detach from the person. I know - easier said than done but no one needs to reply to a text. Date others in the meantime and see what happens.
I really wish I saw this video video earlier
Thank you for sharing your good ideas.
I'd just block him and move on. Not everyone deserves an explanation.
On point message , 👌 👏 👍 💯