HONEST CHAT ABOUT TOXIC WORKOUT MENTALITY: With Advice from Coach Nate at The Run Experience
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- Опубліковано 24 січ 2020
- ♥ In today's video, I open up about my toxic workout mentality that is standing in the way of my progress and health. I often think that I am not doing enough, that my workouts don't count unless I'm working towards a big goal, and that if other people with illnesses can do amazing things then so can I.
I am also joined by Coach Nate from The Run Experience on UA-cam. He shares his journey with mindset struggles, how he overcame them and his best advice to those who suffer just like me.
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HONEST CHAT ABOUT TOXIC WORKOUT MENTALITY: With Advice from Coach Nate at The Run Experience
I hope you enjoyed today's video! If you want weekly updates straight to your inbox, make sure you subscribe to my newsletter here: www.katrinberndt.com/newsletter-opt-in
My toxic mentality in general is holding me back from everything I want to do. All of this advice can be translated to many different endevours where our thoughts take us off track. Aaaaaand now I'm going to push through today's workout haha❤
For me, the biggest and most recent change in thinking has been understanding that something is better than nothing. I would sometimes be disappointed or maybe even not go at all if I did a shorter workout than intended or knew I just didn’t have the energy for a full workout. After a bit of a break from working out, I got myself back to the gym because I began to realize that any workout was better than no workout at all. That shift in mindset has made a huge difference! I’m simply happy anytime I get myself to the gym!
I don't have this mindset about working out but I do in basically every other part of my life - school, work, and personal. I talked with my boss about it one day, and she had some really lovely advice: For some reason we always think we are on the cusp of suckiness which makes us (internally) a failure. But we aren't. We have so much wonderful stuff to contribute, and even if we don't get the exact result we desire, that doesn't make us less worthy of self love and admiration. We are still amazing. We just needed to take it down a notch and remind ourselves that we aren't just what we achieve and at the level we achieve.
I feel you with the not knowing when pain is "normal" and when it's telling me to stop, I have fibro so a lot of physical sensations can be confusing. I do the whole go to hard and hurt myself thing too.
When it comes to mindset I tend to have similar issues when it comes to doing anything. I'm working on being okay with only getting something done part way (or doing 5 reps instead on 10).
Yeah it’s difficult to know when your body is telling you that everything is painful haha.
It's really helpful to see other people talking about the inner struggles of working out and not being good enough and whether something "counts" or is worth doing. There's that I-broke-my-streak mentality that's deadly for me, it says "I am late by a day, so what's the point in lifting? Aw now it's two days, might as well just give up," and gets worse from there. It's like my workout is a friend that I stood up and now I'm embarrassed to see him again.
100% same for me. If I miss my schedule I feel like giving up completely.
I really like your style choices in this video! T-shirt, plugs, and hat all work together well! Also, yet another well done video, great message! Thank you!
Thank you for sharing. I have Lupus and deal with so much of what you describe. It means a lot to talk about your struggles because it makes those of us struggling too not feel alone 💜
thank you for showing your face without makeup. it feels good to see that contrary to what the society wants us to think, women have no obligations to put makeup for their normal days acts (like running) to conform to some idea of beauty... natural is beautiful too and to expect a glam look no matter what you are doing is bizarre.
Haha yeah I wear makeup like one day per week and that is when I record my videos. 😂 But I have no problem not wearing makeup on camera either.
Thanks for tackling this conversation 💜
The thumbnail sums up my feelings about running
Haha mine too sadly. And I like running.
I used to run a half marathon every single day, for about 10 years. I hated doing it, but I felt compelled to, anything less than that was just not good enough. I wasted so much time and injured myself really badly for the long term. I haven't run in 3 years and I feel free for the first time.
That sounds like a horrible waste of time, especially if you didn’t enjoy it. 🙁🙁
Your pain sounds a lot like my fibromyalgia. I know a lot of people with fibro find that exercise is helpful, but only after a few weeks of initial discomfort.
However, I also have hypermobility, which means a lot of my ligaments are loose and I can easily dislocate or subluxate joins for no apparent reason. Because of this, I am limited to very few exercises, and even fewer that I can do on my own without professional supervision. So I kind of end up with the mindset of “why bother”.
I do hope to start going for walks once the snow and ice go away. It’s kind of hard on my knees and hips, but going around the block and up a hill is a good starting point for me. The best exercises for my health problems are core-centered low-impact, low-intensity exercises. If I could afford to take classes somewhere, I could do Pilates, very gentle yoga, and belly dancing.
I miss playing basketball, volleyball, softball, bicycling, and sprinting. I dream of the day where my core and muscles are strong enough for me to do light weightlifting and try things like aerial silks. But that’s a long, long ways off.
Strength training is the most important for those of us with hypermoblilty (eds?). We need to build up as much muscle to support our joints because we can't rely on the joint itself to be stable. You can literally start off super simple and work your way up eg use 2 kg weights, lunges, squats, press ups on your knees etc (of course find what works for you; for example I can't do press ups because of my wrists.)
I do aerial hoop and you will get increasingly stronger over time. I started it after a weight loss so extreme (due to other medical issues) that not only did I lose a lot of weight but I also lost most of my muscle mass and so I was pretty damn weak at first but a good course should be able to work with you on issues like that.
Of course this all generalized advice and everyones circumstances are unique.
Lisa Maw
Thank you for you encouragement.
EDS type hypermobility has been ruled out for me, since not all of my joints are affected. But as far as I can tell, it’s only my ankles that have a normal range of motion. My most problematic joints are my hips (I tend to over rotate and pinch my sciatic nerve), my knees, my lower spine, and my ribs.
When I went to physical therapy, I had to start with quite a bit of core strengthening so that I could maintain proper posture for other exercises. But my insurance changed and I no longer had enough coverage for physical therapy to continue. I tried doing beginner’s yoga that focused on back and core, at home, but injured my back. My doctor told me I couldn’t do yoga anymore unless I was closely monitored in a small class setting by an instructor familiar with hypermobility.
I’m working on improving the nutritional quality of my diet to reduce my fibromyalgia flares and to lose weight, which will take quite a bit of pressure off my knees and hips. I just have to remember that getting healthy again is going to require taking baby steps(:
I had to change my mindset about running a lot last year. I set a giant goal to run 1000 miles in 2019, but I've had two kids and have major sciatic nerve issues. I let my pain get to an absolutely ridiculous level before I finally just stopped. I didn't work out for about 6 months and am now trying to lose the extra weight I put on which also doesn't help with pain! Now I'm doing a lot more resistance training and yoga to try and get everything strong and flexible. Hopefully I can get back to running this year after my body is a little healthier, but right now, it's just not in the cards.
I started running in 2018, I basically took 2019 off after burning out and a shift in my social and work life. I’ve never been very fast, I’ve only been able to run consistently for about 3km, but I really enjoy it which is honestly shocking. The problem is that I am extremely overweight and have a bone deformity that means I require speciality shoes(read expensive) in order to walk let alone run. At the beginning of this year I bought new shoes and went for a walk. It turned into a mile run. It felt so good. I have a hard time working out without a Big Goal as well and often put barriers up in addition to my physical limitations.
On the threadmill right now hating myself and very anxious because I have injuried my arm again and can't lift weights. I have fibromyalgia and can relate so much to how you are feeling. I get injuried because I wanna give it all and don't respect my limits. If we are doing it for health what is the point of doing it, but the mindset is very perfectionist.
Yeah I think it can be healthy in smaller doses. Doing too much is never good.
Awesome video as always Katrin I use the gym for the same reasons you are a true inspiration but no matter how much or little I work out I always feel better for it 👍
That’s good!
I was diagnosed with celiac disease in 2012 and with fibromyalgia and premature osteoporosis last year. I have been gluten free since my diagnosis and it helps with the most obvious symptoms of the illness. However, it is difficult to know how much this autoimmune disease affects the rest of my body. Just like you, I live in pain everyday, which is so frustrating. I used to be a workout junkie, a very active woman. For the last few years I have been unable to exercise, I am always tired and get up every morning absolutely exhausted. Last year I tried to go back to do some light, low impact exercise. It doesn't help that much, which is utterly depressing. So I can't even set working out goals. I need to work on accepting my reality, I guess, and be at peace with life. All the best to you in your journey, Katrin! ❤️
I’m sorry you have to go through that. 😞🙏🏻
@@Katrinberndt Thank you! Love your channel! ❤️✨
lovely home looks warm
I'm trying to learn that anything that lasts at least 15 minutes and make me sweat and my breath gets heavy, then, it's somewhat a "workout" or at least it is that "healthy everyday sports", not sure how to describe it in english but anyway. It counts. My therapist says it counts so I have to believe it. :D Haha.
That's exactly what pain is for. To warn you of danger to prevent injury. To shy away in the face of it is normal. Those "overcoming odds" are only amazing because they're not common!
When you experience pain but know it's not a true warning, you can begin to try to think it away.
Two good books:
On the retraining of the brain : The Brain's way of healing by Norman Doidge.
The power of our minds: Healing before you are cured by Roy Vongtama.
Placebos work 25-50% of the time because our thoughts are that potent.
Thanks for the suggestions! 🙏🏻
Interesting. So you get motivated by achieving long-term goals you set before. I run because I love it. I feel more happy even when I break my time records. I just do it without much thinking. Experience tells me how fast and long I am able to run. I run on a regular basis once or twice a week depending on a work schedule. Currently I make no progress but I don't worry about it. I'm quite sure when on holidays soon my results should jump up. hehe
I completely understand what you’re feeling. This is exactly 💯 me lol sigh. Self torture
YAS!
❤️
I lately read something about the „if you really want this you can do this“ mindset and it really helped me set things into perspective. Unfortunately I cannot cite word by word but it basically said: this mindset is a lie! Achieving goals always is influenced by many factors e.g. individual health, socio-economic status, support by peers, mental health, family history, trauma etc. If this is true, then there is nothing wrong with you not achieving set goals even if somebody else with a similar illness can do it. Wanting something may be a big factor, but it is not the only one in achieving goals.
This really helped me because I can do very little at the moment because of my chronic migraines. This is not my fault! Does this mean I can lean back and do nothing? No I can tune in with my body and my soul, find out what they need and what they can do and do things within these limits. Is it frustrating? As hell, but less frustrating than trying to achieve something I cannot reach and hurting myself physically and mentally along the way.
I tried to battle and achieve everything I did so much Workouts and lost so much weight, that I burned out completely. So now I’m searching for ways that fit my situation better. I ask myself why does it have to be a workout, why not do arts or music, or just take a walk with my dog. I still try to move my body in ways that feel good, but just with the goal of making me feel good. Otherwise I just try to find meaning in other things as well. It’s still a journey. But when you want to examine your Workout mindset you might have to examine why workout is so important to you.
I’m really looking forward to seeing you find your way and I hope that we can talk about it some more in the future.
I agree with you. I used to believe anyone could do anything just if they set their mind to it but as you said, it depends on so many things other than just the mind. A part of me I guess still believes that there is a way for everyone, but the obstacles look veeery different depending on all those factors. And for some it’s probably not worth the fight.
I am toying with the idea of doing Muay Thai again, but hearing your thoughts on performance and running, I think a different form of exercise is best. Something I can just do with small goals and enjoy. I don't think I can kickbox again and just enjoy it. I would want to compete again... But not just compete, but compete professionally again. Yikes. The culture around it is also pretty toxic, but I am not sure about running. I hope you can find a mental solution for your attitude surrounding running. Thanks for the video.
Yeah it’s definitely easier for me to do CrossFit and Body Balance workouts just for fun ‘cause I have no previous experience with it to compare myself to. But I want to run so I’m going to have to work on that mindset. 😊
I hear cherries are good too for this sort of pain that you may be having.
I have a problem with never thinking I did enough. I have the same thoughts and wanting to stop or skip days of the gym because what's the point? I have tried to get my mind to think more positively but it is difficult. I think setting a schedule of when and how much activity be it gym or running might help. After a while it will be more of a habit? I don't know, I still skip days but I feel really guilty and try to go back asap, for my health I have to try. That's the only thing that pushes me. Great video. Thanks
Changing your actions won’t give you different results unless you address what you are thinking. If you thoughts remain the same you will fall into old habits eventually. So start there and try to find ways of replacing your negative thoughts with neutral ones, that’s what I’m working on as well.
@@Katrinberndt good point, thank you.
I totally understand how you feel, and I’ve had all the thoughts you’ve described. I have rheumatoid arthritis and it’s been really hard to keep running. I have been one of those people that “overcame” and I ran a half marathon last year. I had to prove to myself that I could, but to be honest I was in a lot of pain and miserable for the 2 months before while I trained, and I doubted my motivations the whole time. I started and gave up a few times, and race day my longest training run was under 10 miles, which isn’t ideal, but thankfully i managed to not injure myself during the race, and it was my slowest half by far, but it was satisfying. To me it was worth it in the end, but I promised myself my longest run this year would not pass 5 miles.
It’s really hard to find a balance with exercise when you live with chronic pain. We really can’t compare ourselves to other people. Last year my medication was working very well. This year... well I have to try something new and maybe it won’t work so well. So I can’t even compare myself today to myself 3 months ago 🤷🏻♀️
I think not comparing myself to myself is the hardest. I used to be an athlete through and through. Today? Not so much.
As someone who trains folk now & then, the first thing I say to them usually is 'get comfortable with being uncomfortable'. I know people say 'no pain no gain' but in truth, exercise should never cause you pain, just discomfort. It's like....the difference between feeling a deep stretch and a twinge; one makes you go 'ahhhhh', the other makes you go 'ouch!' That muscle soreness/ache feels satisfying. The sensation of tearing something or a part of you feeling out of alignment does not. Try not to guage your own tolerance levels by 'healthy' people (just like getting tattooed) and also try pulling yourself out of the mindset that other people are 'healthy' and you are not. You have a horribly painful issue that can be worked around. 99.95% of the people on this planet will have different issues to be worked around when training. Don't set yourself back a pace before you've even started by thinking your condition puts you at a disadvantage from everyone else, you just have to look at a different approach. Far easier said than done, I know- especially as an 'all or nothing' type of person. I get that :-)
And you're absolutely not alone with your mindset issues either. Even as someone who trains other people, I get dips in my training. If I am consistent with my workouts and get into a rhythm I feel great and make progress but if I stop for any reason, I can struggle to get back on the horse like right now. I've been laid up with sinusitis for a week then just before was working some crazy shifts at work so haven't been to the gym in a couple of weeks. Before that, I was training 5x a week. Right now I'm having a hard time moving but am going to force myself to go for a run shortly, even though I know it'll be rubbish because my lungs are tired from coughing and my legs are going to want to divorce me! Thing is we have to restart somewhere and it's the hardest thing in the world to not beat yourself up over setbacks and to remember you can do it, you'll get back to where you were.
In the meantime, set smaller goals. You can still have a big long term goal like a marathon if that's what you want to do but set smaller targets along the way- don't go beyond them and reward yourself when you achieve them. Doesn't need to be anything fancy- a hot bubble bath with candles and a glass of something or a new funny gym t-shirt you've been wanting. Celebrate the little achievements and it'll hopefully pull your mindset back a wee bit and make sure your targets are within your pain tolerances. That way you will slowly build your endurance until you CAN fry the bigger fish. Hope this helps and good luck to you from Scotland!
You’re very right of course! I wish I had someone next to me when I’m training who felt what I was feeling and could tell me to either ease up or keep going hahah. ‘Cause no one else knows how much pain or discomfort I’m in and therefore they can’t tell me what to do and what not to do... and I might just be exaggerating without knowing it. 🙄
Well, if you ever want to discuss it, you're more than welcome to drop me a line anytime :-) I might not be able to physically feel your pain but I can try and give you some ideas? I'm not the world's expert but you're always welcome
Hope you come back some day
I feel like that.. if I can’t reach that imaginary goal that I set why even try
I like to identify myself as a workout-person. People know me as a person who works out a lot. People often ask me for work out advices. Since I started my new job this october, I have not had the energy or time to work out as much as I used to before. And I feel like shit. I feel like I let people down and let people think that I am someone that I not longer am. I want to work out like I used to, but I very often find myself to be exausted and extremely tired fro my new job as a nurse in a nursinghome for old and very sick / dying people. I know that I would feel a lot better, and get more energy if I managed to turn this situation around, but I do not know how to do it. This shitty situation is making me feel so bad both physically and mentally. I have a dog, and I very often trick myself into thinking that the daily walk with her is enough exercise for me, which it is not. So I really feel you Katrin
🏋🏽♀️🔥
Njce
try swimming, a lot smoother on the body
I hate swimming so much. 😂 And bicycling.
Apparently i have to pay the mcdonalds of back cracking 100 bucks a week because i cant afford the 89 dollar monthly subscription.!?
Perhaps the workouts are too hard for you or perhaps, now I say this jokingly but perhaps you should not wait for Fridays to have tacos. I mean very simply to say that it may be good to incorporate more oil into your diet as it may help your joints lubricate. But I know the ulcerative colitis is very serious I hope you see yourself get better.