Why I Quit Drinking & How Things Have Improved | 180 Days Booze Free But I'm Not Sober

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  • Опубліковано 27 сер 2024
  • I quit drinking on December 25, 2018 and as of filming this video, it's been 180 days booze free.
    [Connect on Instagram: / thejaywoodford ]
    I’m booze free but I’m not sober. I’m still doing things to run from the past and stuff down the pain. It seems to me that until the things that are unresolved remain that way, addiction merely shifts and I’m just as susceptible to succumbing today as I’ve ever been.
    I was warned that 5-6 months after quitting drinking many people hit a wall. When you quit relying on something so heavily and regularly to get you through and you actually have to start to process all the shit you’ve been through and get reacquainted with yourself, it can be really hard and really dark.
    I’m seeing exactly that.
    We have no idea what we’re actually all going through. The learning I’ve gone through about how childhood chaos and trauma - that we don’t even know is still there - how much it is impacting us at a subconscious level is staggering.
    This has been a painful process but I have no choice. We have no choice. It’s either this or death - in one form or another.
    If you’re struggling with booze and you’ve found any of my content helpful, I just sat down and did a video for my 180 days booze free. It’s on my UA-cam (link in bio)
    As always, your comments and messages and feedback on how any of this is helping is my fuel so please don’t be shy. If it’s helped you or means something please say so 💜
    Let's connect on Instagram:
    / thejaywoodford
    Here are some of the links I mentioned:
    Dr. Jordan Peterson & Theo Von on alcohol:
    • Jordan Peterson on Alc...
    Dr. Jordan Peterson's Self-Authoring Suite:
    www.selfauthor...
    Dr. Jordan Peterson's lecture on courage (incredibly insightful and impactful)
    rss.art19.com/...

КОМЕНТАРІ • 211

  • @James-zc9yg
    @James-zc9yg 2 роки тому +10

    One of the few videos I’ve seen that’s real and the brutal truth. I’m 30 days booze free and the only thing keeping me sane is my supportive wife, working out, meditation and yoga. So much deep stuff to work through and just because you’re successful doesn’t mean you can’t really struggle. Your mind is the enemy until you learn to control those thoughts and I’m still battling that. Thanks, brother!

  • @intrakitproductions
    @intrakitproductions 4 роки тому +50

    I was an alcoholic for 20 years ...I am now alcoholic free for over 20 months , it took several attempts but I'm pretty confident in my sobriety now 💯💯

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому +3

      That’s so awesome!! Reading stuff like this makes my day and helps others who are reading the comments so thank you for being willing to share your story 💪💪🙏🙏

    • @anthonywhite9912
      @anthonywhite9912 4 роки тому +2

      It's a good feeling when you know that you can kick it for good.....if you stay focused.!!!!

    • @intrakitproductions
      @intrakitproductions 4 роки тому +1

      @@JayWoodford thanks I appreciate it ,much respect

  • @gdaymates431
    @gdaymates431 5 років тому +63

    I just lost a relationship because I was always picked second to alcohol and I had enough. I don't drink and it's very difficult to date when you're the only sober one. But now I'm much more aware that I'm not interested in being with people whose life revolves around gigs, bars, dinners, friends houses literally any excuse to drink. All that stuff is healthy and fine but when you constantly have to have wine in your hand to take part, I don't think it's healthy. I took my ex away to a beautiful beach house and we were walking to my car with the shopping we just got and she said "should I get wine?" and she could instantly tell I was unimpressed. Her logic was "this is what I would normally do. If I were here with friends I'd be drinking wine." she refused to even question that thought process. Just because you've done something one way your whole life doesn't mean it's the right way! I explained to her that I didn't want to be around alcohol because it was the 20th anniversary of my mother's death and I was already sad and drinking would make that worse. Not to mention the fact that my mother was an addict. None of that even crossed her mind because alcohol and addiction makes people incredibly selfish. I'm so sick of living in a society where people don't even question their alcohol use. It's just standard "drinks on Friday." it's strange to me, when people get medicine from the doctors, they will research side effects but no one even cares about putting poison in their body every single day. It's sad. Sorry for the over share but it's nice to see people on here that don't drink because in Australia it's extremely rare.

    • @gdaymates431
      @gdaymates431 5 років тому +9

      Also she never invited me to anything because I'm the only one who doesn't drink. Which meant I was constantly left out. Like the kid in school whose picked last for the team. It was the first relationship where I felt lonely. Really lonely. I mean, I spent 10 months last year solo road tripping around Australia and not once did I feel as lonely as I did in that relationship. In 7 months I met her friends 3 times. I was the mistress to alcohol. Not a fun time for me at all. But, I'm on my own again and getting to do all the things I love without alcohol and it's great.

    • @emh8861
      @emh8861 4 роки тому +2

      @@gdaymates431
      Wow That was really mean of her not to invite you . Good riddance to her!

    • @gdaymates431
      @gdaymates431 4 роки тому +1

      @@emh8861 I don't think it was personal. She likely didn't want to have to change anything for me to be comfortable there, if that makes sense. My ex, at her core is a really good person who had a lot going on and tried to fit me into a word in which I just didn't fit. I hated the way I felt towards the end of that relationship, being left out and feeling lonely but I'm grateful for the lessons and the nicer times we had together.

    • @anthonywhite9912
      @anthonywhite9912 4 роки тому +2

      You can't have a partner who drinks to excess if you don't..... not going to work.

    • @Jamali31748
      @Jamali31748 4 роки тому

      This is just perfect what you said about people looking aside effects on medicine but not care about alcohol side effects.

  • @jJoeyD
    @jJoeyD Рік тому +3

    Dude, I am at 180 days booze-free. I hit that wall too, and I have recognized the good. Your message is clear and concise. Thank you for being raw and genuine. I keep telling myself when I think I am ready to jump back into the bottle, I tell myself, "This is NOT the best time." Accept only the best because you deserve it. Thank you!!

  • @lorraineferguson6412
    @lorraineferguson6412 4 роки тому +13

    It’s good to hear someone say how hard it is to quit, as I have spent years trying. Now finally getting it, you can’t out run yourself, you have to stop and face your suffering. Thank you 🙂

  • @85drum
    @85drum 5 років тому +7

    Been watching for an hour... The leaving behind of substance and disruptive patterns, opens a door of true awareness. You gain clarity of seasonal changes, personal worth and true respect for yourself, to name a few.
    I'll keep watching as long as you keep posting.

  • @phanoonki
    @phanoonki 4 роки тому +28

    Childhood traumas are always the issue. Dr Gabor mate is excellent with this topic

    • @randblackwell8675
      @randblackwell8675 4 роки тому +4

      "Always"? Sounds like you are blaming something that you know jack shit about. Hit up a psychologist.

    • @imakrewitatl
      @imakrewitatl 4 роки тому +1

      Rand Blackwell fuck man, relax. You need to talk?

    • @imakrewitatl
      @imakrewitatl 4 роки тому

      MRM hes a smart guy, i like his take on social engineering

    • @randblackwell8675
      @randblackwell8675 4 роки тому +1

      Very sorry. I read/saw this the wrong way. I believe Sobriety exists, but again I'm sorry that i disrespectful.. Peace.

    • @Plethorality
      @Plethorality 3 роки тому +3

      I dont think it's always childhood trauma. adult trauma countd. so does plain old dopamine problems.
      I am noticing that stopping coffee has greatly lessened the desire for alcohol. I wasn't heavy with either, but regular enough to really harm my body and brain.

  • @fatherofsonsjaybernal2491
    @fatherofsonsjaybernal2491 4 роки тому +12

    Thanks for sharing. It’s inspiring to see someone in the same struggle winning at life. Every day that we choose not to drink, we win.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thank you for saying! It’s a major battle and I know others are watching on the sidelines and may they find encouragement and courage from your kind words 🙏💛

  • @jamesbodnarchuk6245
    @jamesbodnarchuk6245 4 роки тому +14

    Thank you for sharing your experience. I am 52 I've been drinking for roughly 30 years. I've had many tough moments in life. I was bullied in jr high school to the point were I had to switch schools. My older sister who faced manic depression committed suicide many years ago. I found her alive but she passed away in the hospital. My twin brother who suffered from schizophrenia spent many years in and out of the hospital.he recently passed away after many years of mental and physical problems. He fought the fight every day but couldn't win this fight.my parents were loving parents but my dad was a drinker & rarely exposed his emotions.i work in hospitality & have been exposed to alcohol since day one. It started out as casual fun but then over time took over my life. I was a functioning alcoholic. Recently not so much.i am trying though! Take care!

    • @particleconfig.8935
      @particleconfig.8935 4 роки тому +1

      That's a whole lot of incredibly sad experiences/happenings you had/have to go through. Let's all take our power back by regularly seeing vids like this and reading other's stories and progress in this quest for growth.
      Still no alcohol ??

    • @helpfulcommenter
      @helpfulcommenter Рік тому

      Holy crap man you take care of you and be kind to yourself - you've been through too much for one life.

  • @D_Trade
    @D_Trade 4 роки тому +6

    I'm in the thick of it now. Broke down and finally faced where I'm currently at and went to a couple meetings. Funny thing, while I felt good going and felt I walked away with something gained, I've dove in deeper than where I was before. I know that doesn't make sense or has any rational to it, but damn it it's hard. Thanks for the video man, it definitely helps

    • @neilnoble1771
      @neilnoble1771 4 роки тому

      Dustin, Exactly same as me. I went to a couple of meetings. I sit there meekly. But the better for going. I'm skint. But when I get money I blow it. I make myself so ill. I know I'll resort to crime or death. I cant quit. I've lost all money, now I'm in debt. I make stupid mistakes because I dont try no more. I'm a empty shell now. I feel no hope. Do I care, dunno !
      I wish you well. Are we struggling together ?

  • @nbttl1975
    @nbttl1975 4 роки тому +9

    I keep listening to you and I feel the same way. I realize that I am only "sober" in regards to not putting alcohol into my body. My mindset and my mannerisms are exactly the same. The need to self retract from social gatherings when I've just had enough, and the need to isolate, but the problem there is I also hate being alone; this is just my example and not putting that on anyone else. I think the interesting part of this is my curiosity to know who I am in these moments of "sobriety". I have made the choice to travel more and become more active and really focus on learning as much about other people like me, and it is filling this void. But will it stop or change, and this is my journey now to find out. Everyday is an experience. Thanks again.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      It sounds like it can be a long term battle and that void is definitely because we need to find something better and meaningful so I commend you on proactively going after that and finding answers.
      Thanks for taking a moment to share your story. I know many others are reading these comments from others like you and it will help them so thank you for that! All the best to you!

  • @titusjohnson200
    @titusjohnson200 4 роки тому +2

    Lost a few relationships and got a few DUIs. It’s like why? It’s a shame it took this long to start a change but I’m grateful for this man here. better late than never

  • @shyamlynn243
    @shyamlynn243 Рік тому

    Thanks for sharing and for the reminder about JP's program. It sounds worthy of checking out.
    Go easy on yourself dude, perfection is unattiainable.

  • @anthonywhite9912
    @anthonywhite9912 4 роки тому +13

    101 days clean from everything and I'm really looking forward to a life without substance abuse... Life is just too hard when drugs are involved..... it's not boring without it either...the opposite.

    • @imakrewitatl
      @imakrewitatl 4 роки тому

      I find it boring without. I want to stay clean and i have, but i find it boring

    • @anthonywhite9912
      @anthonywhite9912 4 роки тому

      @@imakrewitatl I used to think that it would be boring too.
      I tried to think of a great time while I was drinking....I couldn't remember even 1 time....
      it's not boring, you just do something else other than drink.....

    • @imakrewitatl
      @imakrewitatl 4 роки тому

      Anthony White i just realized when i stopped drinking i dont have alot of interests. Especially in the winter when i cant get outside

    • @prettyboyproducts
      @prettyboyproducts 4 роки тому

      @@imakrewitatl You're exactly right. Sobriety is boring for a long time, and scary. My sober life took years to build fun memories, friendships, passions, and peace with in. I threw myself into yoga, meditation, new hobbies, travel, etc.. Today, 6.5 years later, I'm still sober and it's still hard. I have a new business and a few new friends, and it's still hard, and yes boring at times. But, in the end, I'm showing up for my life daily and not in a bar wasting it. I wish you the best! Namaste Brian

  • @markg.4246
    @markg.4246 3 роки тому +1

    This may be the most honest thing I've seen on UA-cam concerning recovery. There is physical sobriety, and then there is the behemoth of emotional sobriety. A whole different animal! For the chronic alcoholic, believing that alcohol is the root problem, is a recipe for failure!
    SELF is the root problem. Without self examination, it's difficult if not impossible to "fix" ourselves. It's like taking your car to a mechanic, explaining what you "think" is wrong, and then watching him just "throw parts" at it, without even looking at it himself. That's insane!
    So again, for the chronic alcoholic, do you want to be somebody who just "doesn't drink", or do you want to live happy, joyous, and free?

  • @tommyrichard5981
    @tommyrichard5981 4 роки тому +18

    Just quit 2 days ago, I want this to be the last time! Congrats on your progress

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому +3

      Thanks Tommy and I want the same for you brother! It’s so worth it. I recently started employing the Wim Hof Method. If you’re not familiar with it, you should check it out. It’s been an absolute game changer for me and I know can help others who are struggling with addiction, mental health, anxiety etc. keep in touch man!

    • @tommyrichard5981
      @tommyrichard5981 4 роки тому +2

      @@JayWoodford I will dude, thank you for the inspiring words. I dont know what it was, but when I saw this video it really made me feel like there was hope to quit. I will give it my everything this time and be in touch. Good luck to you and thank you again!

    • @anthonywhite9912
      @anthonywhite9912 4 роки тому +1

      It's not that hard really... depending on how much you drank. Make the decision to quit and from then on just don't put alcohol into your body...

    • @intrakitproductions
      @intrakitproductions 4 роки тому +1

      @@tommyrichard5981 how you doing with your sobriety?

    • @tommyrichard5981
      @tommyrichard5981 4 роки тому +4

      @@intrakitproductions Dude, thank you for asking. I haven't had a drink in 20 days, but I realized I had a problem with xanax as well. I have not had those in 3 days, I flushed about 100 pills today. Sober living has made things so much clearer for me. I am so excited to get my life back. How are you brother?

  • @sirwojenheimthethird2268
    @sirwojenheimthethird2268 5 років тому +3

    Hey Jay, proud to say I’m one of the first to see this new video of yours. You raise some great points and put an interesting new spin on the issue of addiction in general. I absolutely agree that often addiction is a manifestation of underlying issues, especially ones that arise from childhood trauma. You continue to be an inspiration for the way you candidly share your own experiences and struggles. Keep it up brother.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  5 років тому

      Really appreciating our conversations and friendship brother and I appreciate your thoughts on the subject and I'm super proud of what you've accomplished! I've had people telling me about Gabor Mate and I just started listening to some of his stuff. He seems to make a good case about addiction being rooted in childhood trauma which makes sense. Gotta dig in more. As always, I really really appreciate your encouragement and feedback!

  • @devantemalone6609
    @devantemalone6609 4 роки тому +3

    Holy bat smoke!! This is me. I stopped drinking but now im addicted to the gym and boxing but finding myself everyday.

  • @michaelstokes6887
    @michaelstokes6887 3 роки тому

    Having no authority to talk about it like "THIS IS THE WAY" - I love that.
    I really appreciate your authenticity, and It is a joy to connect with you in this way.
    When you say "I'm not sober", that is really encouraging too - it's actually given me another perspective as in to not become comfortable and know how easy it would be slip back into the habit as one night and four pints later was the case for me after four months.
    Thanks again :)

  • @tatertae5730
    @tatertae5730 4 роки тому +8

    My mom passed when I was 11 in front of me on the couch. My biological dad was never there. I have said this alot over my life and it is always a mental exercise to work pass it. I was in denial about the effect , but like you said as you get older you see different effects the pass had on you. My step dad left about a couple weeks later so I know I have real abandonment issues. It makes me get irrational in my self worth to compensate for the losses in my life and the alcohol gives me the strength and numbing needed to not go off the rails, but I dont stop and keep going. Im having another baby and for him I really want to be sober. Thank you for this Jay. I posted on 2 vids today and really want to be on the journey with the rest of the individuals attacking this problem.

  • @AWhileHanlin
    @AWhileHanlin 4 роки тому +8

    'The road less travelled' is a book y'all should read

  • @plusbonus1165
    @plusbonus1165 4 роки тому +3

    Great job .
    Your honesty is brutally enlightening.
    And so helpful for your fellow battlers .

  • @dkowalsky7531
    @dkowalsky7531 3 роки тому +1

    I just sent this video to my son I am a alcoholic and it truly affected my son's life I've been sober over 3 years and I agree with u maybe I'm not drinking but I know I have other addictions my work amongst other things that I work on everyday but admitting this to myself is self healing and growing and I am a better person from this journey

  • @colonelangus2596
    @colonelangus2596 4 роки тому +2

    Are you ok. I am dying .. because of drinking!!! I lost my wife,my house,4 years in jail off And on !! Because of drinking!¡ F booze. If you can help me with this struggle. YOU ARE right on my friend.!! I am 57.! 40 YEARS booze for anxiety.. depression. Alcohol my God is HORRIBLE Horrific.
    You my friend are REAL.!!!

  • @capt.charles4182
    @capt.charles4182 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you so much for sharing. Gives me so much hope to see there is others that feel the same way I do, and can come out of such a dark place and move on.

  • @ChrisCoombes
    @ChrisCoombes 4 роки тому +4

    You look so much healthier compared to your 1 Jan video - well done.

  • @jamiestwrt
    @jamiestwrt 4 роки тому +1

    Thank you bro. Very useful information. I can't begin to tell you how much I identify with what you're saying. I also have my doubts about AA. I'm glad you said it.

  • @timgaucibuilds
    @timgaucibuilds 2 роки тому

    Nice work Jay. Real and considered. Your honesty is appreciated. I’m 61, been drinking since I was 18. I’ve had an amazing and successful career and all whilst hiding my problem with booze. A high functioning alcohol abuser..? I went off all alcohol for 5 months last year then slipped back again - like most.. I’ve decided this time to make a run at serious senior bodybuilding (I’ve been in the gym at various levels for over 40 years) - this will be my substitute for booze. I also listen to Jordan Peterson and what he has to say resonates with me. He is real. Thanks for posting and thanks for your honesty. I just can’t listen to the “professional quit alcohol gurus” they sound so shallow and more interested in signing you up. your posts really help. Keep up the good work young man 💪🏼Tim (Australia - the land of the boozers.. 🤪)

  • @clayryan1196
    @clayryan1196 5 років тому +2

    I gave up Instagram and dating apps (and hopefully Facebook) because I noticed I was comparing others lives to mine and mine feeling inadequate. Never feeling attractive, muscular, or creative enough to get people to click the like button. And I believe you're right about those sober Instagram people setting themselves up. Most is smoke and mirrors.

  • @elijahdunmore7526
    @elijahdunmore7526 3 роки тому +1

    5/15/2021 Hi Jay I just wanted you to know that I am alcohol free for 1 year and 2 month I just want to let you know that I really appreciate you sharing your encouraging words I am very happy I am able to save money I feel like getting up and exercises more I just wanted to thank you again my brother keep making those great UA-cam BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS STAY SAFE 🙏🙏🙏

  • @darrellzayac3441
    @darrellzayac3441 4 роки тому +1

    I'm certainly not going to wax poetic, but just want to say your authenticity is so refreshing. I think your audience feels you.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      I really appreciate that Darrell. Thanks for taking the time to say so brother 🙏🙏

  • @christianfraude4517
    @christianfraude4517 4 роки тому

    I'm in on the journey to Jay after 3 decades of chaos & keeping it in the day as it's the only way for me! Great content once again Brother. Huge respect & love to you!

  • @colonelangus2596
    @colonelangus2596 4 роки тому +6

    The noise!!! The noise in our brains!!!!

    • @Ikaros23
      @Ikaros23 4 роки тому

      its the " monkey mind"+ trauma. Dont listen to the monkey mind!

  • @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361
    @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361 4 роки тому +14

    Replace alcohol with God

    • @Brandon_N420
      @Brandon_N420 4 роки тому +1

      El principe Disla
      God? God doesn’t do shit for anyone. Where is god when we need him most? I’ve called out many times, & you know what happens? Nothing.

    • @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361
      @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361 4 роки тому

      @@Brandon_N420 first you need to get near God with been humble , second , you have to have faith, third you have to understand that God will do things when he thinks is convenient, on his time, some times he work instantly and other times it takes along time, but you have to keep your faith

    • @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361
      @braulindisla-elburrodelaba5361 4 роки тому +1

      @@Brandon_N420 i felt this way before, God didnt do what i needed and for years i waited and GOT tired and lost my faith, but one thing i know for sure is that God is real and amazing

    • @gregorybell6372
      @gregorybell6372 4 роки тому +1

      El principe Disla God is helping me also. I’ve realized that alcohol is exactly what it says at the store.(spirits) (demons)
      It takes a hold of you to the point where you need it just to breath.... I’ve been suffering from anxiety and alcohol was a quick fix for me each but I was tired of killing my self. I could literally feel my body dying inside and I knew what I was doin cause I’m usually health conscience. The closer I got to god he helped me fight those small battles each day such as driving pass that gas station that I usually stop to and grab some mic ultra. I also use CBD and exercise to ease my anxiety on top of praying meditation and just cutting off the things I was doin when I was drinking. I’ve literally started a new routine in my daily life. It works but the first thing I did was get closer to the most high. God is in us! I don’t call him he’s already there. We have to take initiative ourselves and hold ourselves accountable and stop being weak!

    • @clausey007
      @clausey007 4 роки тому +1

      Religion is more dangerous than alcohol

  • @Ikaros23
    @Ikaros23 4 роки тому

    I am also a adult child of a alcoholic ( ACOA google it). the anxiety and drinking/addiction comes from this. When i realised this and see a therapist things have become better. The important thing is to go in the " dark" the past/trauma with a professjonal that you can trust and who is traind for this kinds of issues. Pain and stress is normal part of life, but addiction and trauma makes it 100000% times worse. When we confront and fix the trauma the brain and body heal from PTSD. Its important to see that not all people with trauma become hard substanse/drug addicts ( often they are addicted/obsessed with other stuff), but all hard substanse addicts/drug addicts have trauma. Great video!

  • @chrish6291
    @chrish6291 3 роки тому

    The way you described your childhood is something I can relate to 100%. This leaves you empty inside and it starts at a young age.

  • @sharleenduplessis6632
    @sharleenduplessis6632 4 роки тому

    I will keep watching ...if you keep rippin it! Sobriety is what this planet needs. Love your words and your person..catching up watching all your vids bro...People need to hear you. JP is my man....he is a solid man clinical psychologist that im so grateful for ! Happy you have him as well..:)
    Keep it up and be good, and be good at it !!

  • @gypsydoratarot8441
    @gypsydoratarot8441 4 роки тому +2

    Thank you for shining your light in dark places ❤️✨

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому +1

      Thank you so much for saying that. I love how you put that and that means so much to me so thank you for taking a moment to say so, it’s deeply appreciated

    • @gypsydoratarot8441
      @gypsydoratarot8441 4 роки тому

      Jay Woodford ❤️❤️

  • @vinnyg-men5641
    @vinnyg-men5641 4 роки тому

    I watched your 1st video. I'm 41, and done. It's day 12, but I could tell you were done like I am. I'm not going back to that dark side especially how I feel today. Thanks for sharing Bro.

  • @faceinthecrowd5810
    @faceinthecrowd5810 3 роки тому

    Great story you have shared, hope a long and steady road of sober life for you. In my path, I drank and smoked weed in order to cope with the life I was living, when I quit the drinking and the constant weed my life was still there to cope with, it sucked. So many aspects of my life needed to change in order to make them better if I was not going to numb out. Without any plan or support I don’t think long term sobriety would have been possible for me. For me, I have been a member of AA, and the 12 steps have been the guiding hand in transforming myself into a grateful person that values being sober.
    I stopped when I was 36, married with 3 sons, working as an under paid carpenter. As an artist I was soooo disappointed with what my working situation was, my attitudes were completely shit, when I drank I was a miserable bastard and a blackout drinker. Today I’m 63. Ive been self employed for 26 years and life is hard work but long ago when I became my best friend, and boss, my dreams have become reality. I am and will always be an alcoholic, if I don’t drink I don’t have to go back to hell. That’s my truth, I can’t speak for anyone else.

  • @hdmccart6735
    @hdmccart6735 4 роки тому +2

    Good honest talk there..Been drinking 10+ beers a night for around 8 years, more on weekends. Although I hold down a good job it's consumed every aspect of my life, lost me friends and made me incapable of having a real relationship..people are as tired of me as I am. Starting a 3 month course of Antabuse tomorrow. It will be rough for a month I know, maybe longer, but what are my choices? I'm currently on the fast train to the hell of my own making as Peterson discussed. So here we go..

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому +1

      Amazing my friend. I’m so grateful to read this and have huge hope for you and confidence from what I’m reading. It’s so worth it. If I could have done one thing that would have made quitting so much easier it would have been doing the Wim Hof Method;’cold showers and breath work. It balances you out in a way I couldn’t have ever imagined. Changed me within a week. Dropped my stress and anxiety to basically nothing. Keep in touch and all the best to you. You will look back on this and be grateful that booze was a struggle you had because it will be the thing that will lead you back to yourself in ways you couldn’t have imagined. Reach out anytime. I’m with ya 💪💪💜💜

    • @hdmccart6735
      @hdmccart6735 4 роки тому +1

      @@JayWoodford Appreciate your words Jay. It's a powerful thing to be able to hear others stories and experiences of this drug wherever they may be on this planet, and know that there are people out there who have experienced and live day-to-day with this struggle - we are not alone. Support is crucial. I'll check out Win Hof now, and will give you an update in a month. Thanks friend.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thank you and please do 🙏🤞

    • @joeysbestfriend2614
      @joeysbestfriend2614 4 роки тому +1

      Good luck man! You can do it!

  • @danpostance69
    @danpostance69 4 роки тому

    I take your advice to heart and it’s really helping the way I think about what I was doing, hence stupid things when drinking etc, keep up your good work and advice man 👍

  • @troyjones5389
    @troyjones5389 3 роки тому +2

    I used to wake up and I would drink until I passed out about 8 hours later. It was awful. I still drink but I don't drink like that anymore. I was blacking out every single night. I still drink to excess but Im working on trying to get COMPLETELY sober.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  3 роки тому +1

      That must have been hell Troy. It can be brutal. I’m glad to hear you’re doing better. It’s all pain man. That’s been one of the biggest lessons these last two years is that almost everyone, if not everyone who struggles with addiction of any kind does so because of serious unresolved suffering. Especially us men. We just stuff that shit down and carry on. The problem is it doesn’t just go away. It turns into agitation and anxiety that we can’t figure out what from. Once I learned that and started to clean up the damage from the past, the agitation and anxiety subsided which has made it so that I no longer feel any need to drink. Had I not done that, that constant nine agitation and anxiety would have made it impossible to not drink to shut that off. That was a huge lesson for me. I didn’t want to live the rest of my life in that state and therefore feigning for alcohol or anything else to shut that off.

  • @stephenfermoyle1498
    @stephenfermoyle1498 4 роки тому +1

    i hear EXACTLY what you are saying BOOZE IS AWFUL i feel so much better now BUT i still feel like i am drunk sometimes you are sharing and its good and we can relate and learn.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thank you Steven that’s exactly my hope is for others to not feel alone and to know there is hope! 🙏💛

  • @sarahpassmore4381
    @sarahpassmore4381 4 роки тому +1

    You are very kind. Thank you for making me feel a little less shitty about myself. Just thank you.

  • @bahbahblacksheep9373
    @bahbahblacksheep9373 Рік тому

    im 49 been struggling with booze since I was 16 ,I definitely used it to escape anxiety ,depression, self hatred and shame unless you are an addict you can't understand what its like

  • @elijahdunmore7526
    @elijahdunmore7526 3 роки тому

    Hi Jay I struggle with alcohol for the last 22 years but now I have been sober for 1 year and 2 month I never felt better I just want to let you know I believe you can be free from that posin thanks again and be safe GOD BLESS YOU AND FAMILY 🙏

    • @AVENTUS7777
      @AVENTUS7777 3 роки тому

      Did you have withdrawals symptoms that went away after time?

  • @MsSheilaC
    @MsSheilaC 2 роки тому

    Ive listened to this a few times. Its in my ‘alcohol free’ playlist. Thank you

  • @gary2024-Irl
    @gary2024-Irl 4 роки тому

    This was an incredible video! I can relate to a lot you say sincerely thank you for being so honest and sharing!

  • @particleconfig.8935
    @particleconfig.8935 4 роки тому

    PTSD and all that (repressed) stuff has more to do with the limbic system and HPA than neo-cortical rational thinking. Can access deeper brain layers with practice/meditation (and probably other ways, EMDR(?)), accessing the process of catharsis (it's always helped me to a certain degree (as do many other practices like exercise, hot/cold baths, sauna's, and indeed there's more complex dynamics at work (abandonment issues?)). Indeed we are complex beings, but the free-of-booze thing is definitely a good start or even a prerequisite for further development (I would believe, but of course nothing is black/white).
    It's my 15th day sobriety, drugs and alcohol. Holy molly what a difference in clarity of mind. I don't have all answers, but don't forget to also love yourself, keep appreciating you. These vids help me man, thank you.

  • @rafsoto6383
    @rafsoto6383 4 роки тому

    3rd day and I'm searching all types of videos & its 1a.m. cant sleep and my mind is racing but I oddly feel a bit better. Just a bit blah but this is a good video. I suffer from anxiety and depression and I've been dealing since 15 years old. ... great talk.

  • @gijoemolinaro
    @gijoemolinaro Рік тому

    God bless ya dude and thank you for your honesty ❤🙏👏👏👏👏👏

  • @markbrogan2431
    @markbrogan2431 4 роки тому

    Inspirational words, I can totally relate to. I've just started reading 12 rules for life too, hoping it will help. Thanks and good luck to you.

  • @gregshanahan6766
    @gregshanahan6766 3 роки тому

    thanks for the vid Im currently 9 days sober and Im ready to fight the good fight for my sobriety.

  • @lewissmith536
    @lewissmith536 5 років тому +4

    I Appreciate this video I have struggled for years with this .. thank you

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  5 років тому +1

      Thank you so much for saying so and I hope it was helpful to help you move past it. Life is better without booze, I promise!

  • @anguska
    @anguska 4 роки тому

    I find your videos so incredible. It is helping me tremendously. Thank you!

  • @claranally7745
    @claranally7745 3 роки тому

    Wow you struck a cord with replacing 1 addiction with another. I am currently 3 hours with out a drink and I'm really going to try my best to stop drinking. Last time I stopped I never worked on unhealed childhood trauma. Im still not sure how to fix that. Thanks for this video

  • @thomaspage2773
    @thomaspage2773 3 роки тому

    I know exactly how you feel buddy, everything you said. I'm feeling exactly the same , im drink free. But in your head is the complete opposite, it just wants to go back to the booze and medicate. Make all that pain , anxiety and problems go away. I'm not gonna lie to you. Or to anyone, im so close to relapsing, over these past few weeks. Its like in my head , its already happened and. Now its just taking. That final plunge, and picking the glass up, of my favourite poison. When you first get sober. The Doctors, Counsellors etc , don't fully tell you. What you're fully gonna be in for , cos I didn't even realise. How bad my addiction was , till after few few months. Then it lifted for a while, I felt great and said. I'm starting to get this , I don't want to touch it ever again. But this is what's called the honeymoon period. Also pink cloud syndrome, where you feel like. Your in a euphoria and , when you feel it . It is great, your anxiety, depression, past memories. Is all gone . But when that lifys away from you, boom reality kicks in and everything hits you. Like a tidal wave hits you and get trapped in it , hitting everything along the way . This is the part where all the experts don't tell you, where you have to learn to deal with your true feelings, emotions and all the bad shit. That you've being through in your life, it's so hard to break it all down and . Cope with it , im no where near cured . From addiction my alter ego, just wants to break out and. Say know what fuck you man , I've had enough and. Want to taste it again and feel the buzz. I'm done pretending to everybody's, that I'm fine . When deep down inside, im in torment and screaming and. The cravings feel that intense, it just drains the life out of me . Thats the turn its taking for me now and. Just feel like im stuck, part of me is saying go for it. The others grabbing slapping me saying, think of the consequences. If you put that in me again, this disease I hate it so much and, I wouldn't wish it . Ony worst enemy, it rips your mind etc to shredds. I may relapse at anytime, cos I'm just tired and fighting. Feel like im losing, my heart goes out to. All of you whos going through this , cos this is a constant battle and . Were so doing are best to do the right thing, all we can do is our best . If anyone tries to judge you, or say why you letting it it get to you. Reason why is cos there not addictied. Way we are. Is i say ro people who don't suffer this crippling illness, you have to be . In the same boat, to know how it feels.

  • @bonnieyoung3370
    @bonnieyoung3370 4 роки тому +1

    Love your raw honesty, really helpful.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thank you for saying so! Can’t help anyone by sugar coating or playing the hero especially when people are hurting and feeling alone and like they’re the only ones in the world with a problem.

  • @sublyme2157
    @sublyme2157 4 роки тому +2

    Every man and woman ever born is made in the image of God. You bear His image, you breathe His air, you live by His Spirit. Anything you ever hear that's contrary to that is bullshit. Once you accept that, everything makes sense. I know people will down vote, and I know people will respond in hostility. Hell, this may even get deleted. But you were made by God and saved by His grace. Don't f_ck that up.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thanks for taking the time to say so. Definitely won’t get deleted!

  • @kevinpickering9812
    @kevinpickering9812 Рік тому

    Difficult to do this on your own, but I got this, thanks again...

  • @MotivatedBulliez
    @MotivatedBulliez 5 років тому +1

    You've become my go to guy in less than an hour

  • @Mentesestoicas_
    @Mentesestoicas_ 4 роки тому

    I’m 2 months buzz free and is really fucking difficult but the buzz is not even the problem. As you say, I start to learn about myself and is painful as fuck. Now I’m really better but lets keep doing 💪

  • @momma_goose
    @momma_goose 4 роки тому +9

    He’s right. For those that want to really fix themselves - do the Jordan Peterson self authoring program. It saved my life

  • @itsonlymeok
    @itsonlymeok 4 роки тому

    Thanks so much for this. Wow watching different videos from different people all day subscribe to a few of them now I realise lots of them been talking shit. I will be watching all of your vids day one for me 👍🏼. Thanks.

  • @particleconfig.8935
    @particleconfig.8935 4 роки тому

    Since my father committed suicide here in the Netherlands when I was (also) sixteen (just became 33 now), there hasn't been any, any ways of professional cleansing of trauma (which has created a certain distaste for ''health care'') and the mess that resulted from it. I always wondered, where are they. It's sometimes not easy to get my heart-rate down at night but it gets better when I roll up in a fetus position, and the nightmares can be gruesome too. And then you have this complex of thinking you might be acting like a victim and being a hypochondriac (which I've been accused of). Modern Medicine... but no development for trauma ! Can't believe it. we'll have to find ways, and thanks to Peterson types we can explore, resolve and build :)
    Cheerio ;)

  • @straighttalker9410
    @straighttalker9410 2 роки тому

    Alcohol is pretty much the only bad thing I ingest (no drugs, no fast food, no sweets, no added sugar, no deep fried food etc. etc.) and I exercise almost every day. I think if I quit alcohol I'd have to start eating ice cream and chocolate. Not sure which is worse???

  • @RTSBone
    @RTSBone 4 роки тому

    Dear friend, you look physically healthy right now, so quitting alcohol was definitely a good move. Consider trying Ayahuasca and Iboga. They will also address the underlying emotional issue of your “addictions”. I also think they work well with JPs self-authoring programs.

  • @florinnyc6371
    @florinnyc6371 3 роки тому

    I am trying again to quit. I fall back a few times but I really really hope this time I can stay sober. I am a binge drinker mostly in weekends but I drink a lot at one session and I can t stop. I actually want to get drunk before drinking the first glass. I want they buzz. So many to say , did so many wrong thinks to the people around me. I don t know how to live without alcohol. How you go out somewhere, how you pass the holidays , how you pass a weekend sober, ? Boring but healthy. My last few years was horrible, the hangovers are getting worse and worse. I am preparing myself for a whine to just stay sober and live my life normal because I feel that I am trapped by this evil liquid

  • @nixianer7503
    @nixianer7503 4 роки тому

    3months free here! thank you so much!

  • @nword5999
    @nword5999 4 роки тому

    your aware....that's a plus.....keep putting your voice to it.....ask for help with people that have been there....stay away from other peoples opinion....that's what i did....oh and found what i loved & brought me joy.... trust God brother...i read the 4 agreements....

  • @gokhantoksoy2826
    @gokhantoksoy2826 2 роки тому

    are you still there? great video, thank you !!!

  • @nathanhughes9996
    @nathanhughes9996 3 роки тому +1

    Every bad decision or stupid thing I have ever done was due to alcohol. Im 30 and have drank semi heavily for the last 10 years. I have a 2 year old son now and a few months back I woke up with the worst hang over, looking at him and not having the energy to get out of bed and be his dad made me feel terrible. So I kicked the habit! My little trick is if I think about alcohol or someone offers me a drink I just say "nah no beers for me today, maybe tomorrow" the next day I say the same thing 😁

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  3 роки тому

      Nathan thats awesome brother! I can remember days like that too - just feeling like the biggest piece of shit. If I can offer any advice, it would be that almost all addiction is fueled by underlying unresolved suffering/events of some sort. When I first quit, I was golden for the first few months. Just carried on better than ever and thought that was how it would remain until it didn't. One of the most impactful things I've learned in this process is that unresolved trauma/events if not dealt with, get suppressed and though we rarely sit and ruminate on the things that happened, it will still manifest as this constant agitation and/or anxiety. That's definitely what lead me to drink to begin with because that was the only thing that shut that off. Anyways just keep that in mind. I hope it's smooth sailing for you and I'm super pumped that you've been able to kick it but if things start to get dark, please keep that in mind. There are some very profound and fast acting methods for dealing with and resolving past trauma that does not involve endlessly talking about it in therapy. All the best to you brother and congrats again!

  • @mrxplorer8427
    @mrxplorer8427 5 років тому

    Keep up the good work buddy, you'll get there..

  • @DaveOfAmerica
    @DaveOfAmerica 3 роки тому

    Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking and Annie Grace's This Naked Mind changed my life. I am 7 months alcohol free and almost 1 year without cigarettes. I smoked and drank for over 25 years and those two books allowed my to turn away from addiction with relative ease. It was scary for sure but in retrospect it wasn't that hard. I feel amazing in both my body and my mind and I am never going back. Don't be afraid. Take the leap. You won't regret it.

  • @tylerdurden4289
    @tylerdurden4289 4 роки тому +1

    This guy speaks the truth

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thanks for saying so Tyler. I really appreciate that brother 🙏🙏

  • @davida7559
    @davida7559 4 роки тому +3

    I drink do to my severe anxiety depression and ocd. Sucks big time and I keep going round and round

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому +3

      David, I totally understand and can relate 100%. That is not uncommon at all and when I quit drinking to soothe that pain, a big part of my process has been really diving in and working on that and trying to get to the root of why I had a complete inability to shut off and enjoy the moment, without alcohol. If I could recommend anything to you it would be to listen to Dr Gabor Mate’s talks. He is an expert in early childhood trauma, and addiction and how those things relate and how we have to deal with some of those underlying issues from early on in life. I can tell you that that has been a huge step and improvement for me in my mental health and allowing me the strength to quit drinking. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything, it has been an amazing journey and I hope that this finds you well and gives you some help as well

    • @Brandon_N420
      @Brandon_N420 4 роки тому

      I drink for the same reasons, severe social anxiety, & depression. It’s hell, & I really want to stop drinking so much. Ur not alone.

    • @randblackwell8675
      @randblackwell8675 4 роки тому

      See a psychologist. It helps!

  • @vivekantogmailcom
    @vivekantogmailcom 4 роки тому +2

    Never relapse ❤️

  • @peteflint7281
    @peteflint7281 4 роки тому +1

    Absolutely spot on. Fantastic!

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Thank you so much for taking a moment to say so, I really appreciate that!

  • @michaeleae4207
    @michaeleae4207 Рік тому

    Love the comments. Hope you have some inspiration. I'm struggling. I'm fucking lost. Thanks. I digress, I don't comment on anything, for the most part. Good job 😊

  • @frankchmiel1846
    @frankchmiel1846 4 роки тому +1

    Helps more than you know

  • @willsworld9648
    @willsworld9648 3 роки тому

    I am really trying to quit.
    I am aware of my problem and that I am hurting my family.
    I’m tired of hurting them and my self!

  • @kevinpickering9812
    @kevinpickering9812 Рік тому

    Thank you, salute....

  • @tonyac7396
    @tonyac7396 4 роки тому +2

    You are already amazing...

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  4 роки тому

      Got a long ways to go but thank you for your kind words

  • @helpfulcommenter
    @helpfulcommenter Рік тому

    Almost 3.5 years since you made this - Whoa nellie has Jordan Petersen changed. Do you still find value in his thinking? I used to but then realized what a hypocrite he turned out to be and moved on. Curious if you're still a fan of his.

  • @urfavweapon719
    @urfavweapon719 3 роки тому

    Been a couple weeks. Not counting the days because it's a lifestyle, now. In a few years I can look back in my camera roll and calculate how many days since my last drink.

  • @KPrayfortheworld
    @KPrayfortheworld 3 роки тому

    Thank you

  • @n.b.l.5709
    @n.b.l.5709 3 роки тому +1

    16 days

  • @alanr4263
    @alanr4263 4 роки тому +2

    Maybe a yeah In March.I like title that's how I feel I'm not Sober.

  • @rehanbshah
    @rehanbshah 4 роки тому

    You are a true star bro

  • @jpsabbey
    @jpsabbey 3 роки тому +1

    I can really resonate with what you're saying. I'm also not an alcoholic but definitely a problem drinker. I would only drink every second night because I would drink so much that I wouldn't even feel like a drink the next day, instead I would almost enjoy the hangover and hide myself away in bed studying health, and everything else that interested me lol. Now I'm 5 days off the booze and feel ok BUT incredibly uninspired. Trouble is and possibly always will be is that I know after 30 odd years of heavy binge drinking that within 2 drinks everything would be amazing. I love the thoughts, inspiration, loud music , sex, and just a general feeling of euphoria. It's a tough quest we are on my friend, but like you so eloquently said , there are also many horrible times when the mood and drinking has gone too far and really stupid events have taken place , then I think if only I can stop at a certain point and not be an absolute loose cannon everything would be fine. There is the dilemma. I've tried countless times to do just that, but have to admit and surrender to the fact that I can't because the trap is that after drinking a certain amount all sensibility and rational thinking goes out the window. It is really a case of quitting while ahead because like you somehow I have evaded disaster and even death from making stupid decisions while drunk. All the best to you , your sister and anyone else going through this.

  • @jimharris2452
    @jimharris2452 4 роки тому

    I am so glad I found you. Truly an inspiration! Finally someone who I truly feel is on the same level and gets it. I lost my dad to suicide 18 years ago when I was 20 because my mom was having an affair. Haven't had a relationship with her since. Been an alcoholic ever since. Going on 3 days without any booze

  • @redriddler1231
    @redriddler1231 Рік тому

    So you're sober, but haven't drank any alcohol. "Then you're a dry drunk"
    Don't worry me too.

  • @wearelive503
    @wearelive503 4 роки тому

    Cheer up mate , ya only live once in this life

  • @Dana-kh5lj
    @Dana-kh5lj 4 роки тому

    Have you looked into The Sinclair Method?

  • @Miles-jv2rz
    @Miles-jv2rz 5 років тому +2

    Read Ernest Becker’s “Denial of Death”.

    • @JayWoodford
      @JayWoodford  5 років тому +2

      Thank you for the recommendation!

  • @DenverZips120
    @DenverZips120 4 роки тому +1

    I love Jordan Peterson videos!

  • @edswartzify
    @edswartzify 3 роки тому

    I just hate feeling like shit all the time.

  • @sharicowley8186
    @sharicowley8186 3 роки тому

    Had 2nd thoughts an didn't want to wake up with a severe hangover

  • @normantheforeman9866
    @normantheforeman9866 3 роки тому

    Dr Jordan Peterson has helped me so much also