My New Husband Won't Help Support My Family
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- Опубліковано 12 тра 2019
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This isn't fair to the husband!
that is why she got married
He is an adult and said I DO. They need to work it out.
@@gwenscott535 So is she and her adult family members. Her family needs to get off their collective butts and be adults about it and come up with their own solution just Like Dave said. Sell the 60k property or move back. They have the means to not be in this situation, just too suborn to do anything about it. Instead they are relying on her to worry about their problems for them. Ridiculous!!!
Gwen Scott it’s very possible he was not made aware of what the real situation is. Also marrying someone does NOT mean you have to take care of their family.
Thank you for saying that.
Personally, I think the husband made a mistake.
Maybe she is really considerate in the bedroom and he thinks it's worth it.
I smell a divorce
Every husband made a mistake
@Ty Somers Some more than others
He done fudged up
A brother staying on family property while this woman pays for everything is insane.
very insane😂
A husband's responsibility is to his wife and children. He is not on the hook for taking care of your extended family.
Truer words have never been spoken. Unfortunately, in a lot of foreign cultures (and even in the US amongst certain minorities), it's an unspoken rule that whomever makes the most money has the responsibility of providing for those that aren't as "fortunate."
💯💯💯💯
I disagree. Families should take care of each other where there is real need, but the responsibility should be shared fairly. Life is unpredictable. What if he and his wife were killed in a freak accident? Would it not be their hope and prayer that the grandparents and siblings would care for their children/future children properly and not leave them to welfare/state?
@@ulical The thing is we're in America so we follow American culture. If I go to the Philippines then we can follow their culture.
@@littleripper312 and that's the reason Filipino family crumble because they are depending too much in one person as a bread winner, and by the time the bread winner is sick and needs help, all they can offer is moral support and prayers which result to all of them go broke and hungry, sad reality. To have food, house, water and medical help you need money.
7 siblings and they can't take care of their parents?! Hubby needs to flee.
mwafrika4 seven losers.
I’m married and my husband and I often help MY mom and HIS mom when we can . But getting my siblings and his siblings on board is difficult
@@AEpsalm - they are selfish. Bet they would help out of you guys stopped doing everything
Parents need to go back to their country
It’s less than $300 per sibling a month. She has way too many excuses.
They should have cleaned this up before getting married.
she got married so he can clean this mess up
She though he is the solution for her problems. It was simply a matter of locking him down without a premup if he has no debt and has a good stable income. He's her betabux.
@ablackprep Her siblings are smart, that's why. Parents could live almost on nothing outside of the US in their very own home. For certain they would not need 2000$ a month...
Yeah this is a mess to talk about
@ablackprep Yeah... that is what my statement is referring to.
Central American parents need to stop with the whole “My kids are my retirement account” bull.
So they come to america hoping tax payers will be their retirement account
@@GrumpyCat-mw5xl that ignorant comment Is farthest from the truth. Stop being racist and educate yourself.
@@Will-oj3un it’s exactly the truth. Racists tend to see racism everywhere. Stop being a racist and educate yourself.
@@GrumpyCat-mw5xl If you don't pay into Social Security, you're not getting Social Security.
For real! It’s Hispanics and Latinos in general. So much shame in the culture! Nobody has financial literacy and the financial responsibility gets passed on to whomever is the biggest sucker.
I get the impression her siblings choose to see her as “the one with all that American money” and use that view to justify their unwillingness to help support their parents.
Yep and all the folks in the comment.section talking about her family cultural norms fail tomsee that the whole family doesn't appear to follow.those implied norms.
Yes, b/c everyone in every other country KNOWS that money just falls off of trees here in the US. No one ever seems to concede anymore that maybe Americans work HARD for their money. Getting worse every day too.
When indeed she got 110k in student debt and seems to have no career/income to justify it. She's the one "in debt all that American money" living off her husband.
yeah, most likely…
Bet the siblings spend whatever they want.
I get the feeling her husband didn’t know any of this before getting married to her
A surprise.
Same. She lied to him, bigtime.
@@abcdefu359 She forgot to tell that he wasn't marry her, but also her parents and her 7 brothers and sisters.
Nah, I get the feeling he knew, but guys tend to get blinded by foreign women
Doubt it. He needs discernment.
Husband is the one that should be calling Dave Ramsey.
Husband knows only half the story !
Dave would tell him to bail.
@@christopherbeddoe406 Dave is a huge simp. He'd tell the guy to man up while he handles women with kids gloves most of the time. Its gross.
...or a divorce attorney.
The family thought her getting an American husband was their winning lottery ticket.
Her too. Dave asked her if her husband knew, before they married, that she’d keep paying for her parents... that girl stuttered before answering. He didn’t know. She saw her husband as a cash-cow, just like her parents see her as a cash-cow. What’s worse is that US tax payers are absolutely paying for her parents too. 1) caller said none of her sibling help, 2) parents are in their 80’s and don’t work, 3) they have assets in Central America that their other kids are living in, but they have “nothing” here, 4) she pays for half their mortgage... where are they getting all the rest of their money? Welfare, that’s where.
Marrying this woman was a mistake. He did not think it through.
Ohhh but he did think about it. Unfortunately for him he was using his little head.
@@karlsbergkarl2230: Did you mean reciprocator?
The mistake was they didnt discuss the financials enough. He ignored it and got married anyway.
@@kthekeeper5117 what else ?
Why?
He’s your husband not a monthly welfare check or section 8. If I were him I’d be so gone.
Facts
To be honest here I was in a situation similar to this with my ex wife. Not necessarily as bad as this one, but I will have to say that when your married and committed like he is it's very hard to just "be so gone". I'm not saying your wrong because I feel what your saying 100 percent, Ive been there. But it's far easier for people outside the aquarium to see problems then it is when your actually living in the aquarium. Feel me?
That poor fella is trapped 🤮
Dude should be gone like smoke in the wind on this. I'll make a prediction that as soon as her loans are paid for she will be gone.
Same here. I would have hit the road a long time ago
So she's subsidizing her parents, while the sibling lives in the parents house and pays nothing? Yeah, that's kinda BS
Well, she has got to get her loans pay off somehow while paying off a home that the husband doesn't have a stake in. It's crazy for her not to combined the finances because when they divorced later, he'll be settled with the whole debt from the settlement, and she'll also get the home they live in. It's a win win for her, her parents, and the 7 siblings.
Lol that exact reason guy above me stated is why marriage rates are falling through the roof lol
@@NG-di5lc You NEVER EVER combine finances.
@@heinzkitzvelvet We did and our house is almost paid off. We are like minded when it comes to finances
Omgosh i didnt even think about that too!!! The sibling living with them in the parents house. Its a mindset and they need to go back . She can’t do that to her husband
Husband will pay out the loans then will magically find that her love is gone and divorce is looming.
Lol
Happens more often than one would think
And she will find a million ways to justify it! ...AKA- It's not her fault!
@@BST-lm4po It's not her fault indeed, though. It's her nature. We, men need to stop having excessive expectations of women and start taking them for what they are. It's our fault, really.
@@mateca911 How is it men's fault?
Luckiest man is the “exhusband” lol
@hermit gains luckiest man is who laid pipe and dipped lol
Now we know why he is the ex-husband
I AGREE! LUCKY EX-HUSBAND!!!
Being an ex-husband is the worst situation not the best...
You got that right
Wow, you want him to pay off your $111,000 student loan and support your family. You probably wanted an expensive ring and a big wedding too. You're too expensive, I would've kept shopping.
Same here. There isn't any female worth all the BS that she brings along with her.
RUN !!!!
Unless she's hot and a straight up freak.
Rich Farfugnuven lol that’s a side chick you are worried about
@@richfarfugnuven6308 dont be a simp!
Her "Let's combine money and I'll give it to my parents"
Him "Huh? Um, no"
Her husband made the biggest mistake of his life. Yikes
I`m sure she didn`t tell him till after they got married.
run forest run
This hurts, because coming from a caribbean background, this is our parents mentality. They use the children as a pension plan. Freaking sick. Her husband is right, this is toxic and if I were him I wouldn't even put myself in that situation.
he already married her.
@@nryanmusic And???
So true...the parents are entitled 🙄
I agree Africa too the same
They took care of you when you’re a baby. Now it’s your turn to take care of them. You sound ungrateful, dude.
This guy needs to run. This lady has no control of her life.
Too late now, he married her. She can file for divorce and get a big chunk of his assets.
true.. but where it stands now.. they need a family meeting. If no one else comes to the plate.. I'd question running :)
@@bigd1223 under 1 year you can get an annulment. Even if he had to pay alimony right now it would be only for half the time they are married. Literally any option other than staying is guaranteed to be cheaper.
@@bigd1223 why do you think she got married ?
Stupid comments under this video.
Has almost 90% of the debt...wants to combine finances...writing is on the wall with this one.
This lady sounds super expensive. I would never put a ring on her finger.
He should not pay for her student loan debt, and most definitely _not_ for her parents.
This happens all too often. Some guy marries a woman with massive debt, and as soon as it has been paid off she's gone.
He shouldn't have married her in the first place. That was a dumb move.
@Google Acct He needs to hit the road before he knocks her up and is tied to her for life
The husband isn't too bright.
This lady's parents aren't gonna sell yhe property back home because it "belongs" to siblings there. Property in US belongs to her & her brother because he still lives there, so she can't sell that either all the while paying $2000 per month. She is gonna get preggers next year leaving husband all the stress & financial burden. And as soon as he remembers that he has a life too in a year or two. His wife will want to divorce him with him paying $2000 alimony a month!!! There!!! I said it first.... this is how her & his next 3yrs are going to pan out!!
She is essentially paying for her brother to live the house rent free
She's not being ridden. The husband is. She is an enabler and complicit.
She didnt tell her husband all of this. I dont BLAME him for not wanting to combine finances. THEN she has more than 80% of the debt😒
combining finances would be the end of him..
@zadose she didn't tell him, we all know this. No way a man signs up to take care for 9 people
Female Psychology:
Money: "What's mine is mine, what's yours is mine!"
Student loans: What's mine is yours, what's yours is...Hun, that's yours!
~Bachelor...I Stand Alone...I got my " Table", Ms. I hope you "own" one as well.
This video goes out to all the guys who say marrying a foreign girl is better.
🤣 🤣 🤣🤣 🤣 🤣🤣
@Keep Rocking!
If you said that 10 yrs ago, I would agree.
It's different now.
You can thank social media.
@Keep Rocking! couldn't agree with you more!
Foreign girls not from here. Once they move here and americanize they become just like every other American girl.
Foreign girls are definitely better he just got an american girl. She has no accent and she went to college that's definitely not a foreign girl will definitely not a mexican that's for sure
@Eric Collins From what I've seen, Latino beauty does fade, FAST. By the time they're 30 they have 4 kids and they're 60 pounds overweight. But you do you.
I'll never forget the day my husband and brother-in-law took me to lunch and told me that my parents could give me money out of my trust fund to cover their mother's expenses. Shortly thereafter I filed for divorce. Oh, and I never had a trust fund.
It was a pre-plan/strategy between the two brothers to offend you to make you launch the divorce proceedings - they remain innocent bystanders.
Never happened
Good for you!
@@kayala1689 Nah. I think they firmly believed they could manipulate her into agreeing to it.
"We were never taught about finances or savings." Hence why her parents are reliant on kids to live and survive in the first place.
"We were never taught about finances or savings." - that would have been the signal for me to get up and say "and good day to you ma'am." The biggest source of marital instability is money and getting married to someone that has no clue about economics/finance is a recipe for disaster.
I think personal finances is common sense, no one in my family taught me either yet I value my possessions, I save and invest and live within my means. My one brother on the other hand has filed bankruptcy twice and is always broke.
One brother lives in their house, and she takes care of them here? wow.
@@gwildordipkin6504 the brother lives in the house back in central america, not the one in the US
Ur debt is more.
Ur family mooches u and now u want to let them mooch ur husband.
U didn't tell ur husband everything before getting married.
Siblings are cheap selfish adults.
My sympathies with ur husband, poor guy .
"the things i do for love." ~the husband
the family should drown in a pool of water out of shame
Honestly it sounds like
You can tell the woman feels guilty now when she talks to Ramsy
@@realamazingworld6756 she isn't guilty a bit.
Send the parents back home and let them enjoy the rest of the time they have left
Send them $500 a month and they should be good
Yes and the leach siblings should contribute to the $500
Belize would be a cheaper lifestyle.
Send them nothing. Theyre adults.
Very smart. Oh and put your brother on the street.
300 more than enough. Brothers can help. They wont i know it for sure.
This is why you always do your homework before marrying someone.
Dave Ramsey's insights have been a game-changer for me! His practical approach to financial management has empowered me to take control of my money and work towards a debt-free life. The Total Money Makeover is my go-to guide, and I appreciate how he breaks down complex concepts into easy-to-follow steps
“Let’s pretend you’re broke”
“We don’t have to pretend”
😂😂😂
Nailed it right there.
@@royalarmy1837 - yup. She was right on the money!
She finally gave him a good answer lol
😂😂😂😂😂😂 shoot
Yeah I know that was hilarious
This is so common in other cultures. The parents are expecting to be fully taken care of by their children, but it often winds up being only one of the children who does anything.
It really is common and does end up that way. I really dislike how most people commenting here are projecting their cultural norms as if what the caller is doing is so stupid; providing for her parents isn't the problem, it's the debt. Ramsey is only giving her advise that makes sense for someone who has a similar culture as he does. Like, not everyone wants to send their 80 year old mother to a nursing home and let her pension cover it.
Okay but that doesnt mean that's right that it falls on one sibling. The rest of the family should be stepping up and helping. Regardless of the culture that's not a cultural norm to put it on one
That's why they need to have 10 children. It's like playing slots.
Lots of people fail to adult properly, and can’t afford to help support the parents.
There is a reason that government funded pensions were invented.
I'm with Dave Ramsey, I agree that a charitable act of helping to take care of parents in their old age can be a good thing, but its horrendous that the PARENTS allow one of their children to be the pack mule.
My brother was pressured to assuming his new wife and mother in laws credit card debt which was substantial, when he got married. He didn’t know about this prior to getting married. I talked him out of doing it.
She thinks its weird that her husband doesn’t want to combine their debts when her debts are aver 5x more than his
That's how marriage works buckaroo. Your debt, her debt, it's both of y'all's debt.
It didn't sound like the debt was the problem, it's her parents living off of her that's the problem. She thinks they are her financial responsibility because she's the "rich" child living in America. Her siblings obviously feel the same way.
The parents are 80 years old with a paid off property in Belize. All the siblings live in Belize. What are they doing here? I think she’s paying for her parents because she brought them here. They are in the country for her comfort.
Smartest comment I've read
possibly for the medical care they would have access to if included on her plan
@@fixt100 There are doctors in Belize, the daughters money sent back there would at least be worth more and be able to stretch further. Medical costs in the US are horrendous.
@@crzyruskie86 if you work for the right company medical costs are covered under health insurance plan her company provides.
because i know my moms hip would have cost over 100k if no insurance....
She expects her husband to be a push over...
"Do you give your family money without talking to your husband?"
"Well...."
(Stop, that's all we need to hear)
Don't combine your finances bro lol.
Hopefully he had her sign a prenup so she cant take him for half hes worth when she decides to gold dig somewhere else
@@ExplorationRandomDestination , prenups are scams and worthless, especially if kids come later. Please read up on them and do not help spread what is a lawyer scam. They charge you for writing them and then play the other side to get them invalidated.
TheBashar327 dont planned on getting married for awhile thankfully. If ever.
He’s stupid he shouldn’t of married her
Yeah she was quite evasive lol 😂
She can't get him to do what she wants so she's calling to hopefully get reinforcements to convince the hubby to do what she wants
Yeah that's how the pinays operate they have a shaming culture and it does work on their own but not so much with Americans
@@derekintheph8935 I seriously don't understand "shaming culture" ..like, what are you going to do - continue to *not* contribute anything? You're already shameful for letting other people do things for you when you're capable of participating. This supposed bond between us - "family", does what for me, exactly? If I have this obligation to you, do you have an obligation to me? Please tell me you're something other than a line item in my budget...
Tons of shame in the culture. Religion train these women really well.
@@jamesmoriarty9603 you nailed it
@@derekintheph8935 I’m from Central America too and I would’ve done the same thing the husband is doing. This husband you’re calling American made the biggest mistake by marrying this chick. He should never combined his finances with her.
Dude, she is exploiting him. What is she contributing to support her husbands parents? Nothing.
80 year old people shouldn't have home loan
Especially when they can't afford to make the payments...
The parents should sell the property
and down size
jim h yeah they should have a small condo or apartment lol 😂
@@ScottyByrd
The parents should have a good life
But not at the expence of their children being over extended...
Yes they ahould be living in something they an afford..
Or where they can afford
Also 80 year old people should have a security number. The whole time they stayed in the US, they didn't try to fix their status there.
If she and her husband are paying the mortgage then they should be building equity in the house when it's eventually sold.
Truuuee. My parents had their home paid of, when my older sister got into college. That was really good, because they could financially support her and later me through college. Now we are done with college, my parents are retired and noone in the family has any dept =)
she has a 100,000 in debt, she pays mortgage for their parents house even if they have paid property abroad and and none of her 7 siblings is helping besides her? and she doenst get why he doesnt want to put his income in this family?
buddha5000ប្រេីតែអំណាចចិត្តតែបុណ្ណោះ
She pays mortgage? U mean her husband pays their mortgage?
the caller pays the mortgage for the house her parents live in. caller+husband dont live there and the parents have a paid-for house they just dont want to move there or sell it because some other relative is staying there rent free.
blubbness yup. And for Dave to side with the husband, you know it's serious.
Yep. That's called "female logic."
Listening to callers on Dave's show has made me greatly appreciate never taking out student loans.
Amen brother!
I don't care what Dave says, I'm not paying my wife's debt! Not happening!!!
I fully agree with you.
Same. If it's a small amount, like a few thousand okay no problems. But not student loans.
I really wonder if she talked to her man about it
Then dont get married. It's not yours vs mine.
@@adhdgirlies Yes, we agree with you. Don't get married to women with lots of debt.
If I was the husband I'd be asking what's in the will. Why pay the mortgage on the house if it's going to be divided between all the siblings, when the parents die.
That's smart!
Wow excellent point! I’ve seen these types of families before.. siblings who want nothing to do helping their parents while they are alive, but the second the old parents die, they are first in line with their hand out for demanding their inheritance
Easy just put the husbands name on the deed or draw up an equity contract taking a percentage of the sold home.
Dom Johnson easy just do not do it and leave her. She have all the signs of a gold digger not even married a year and talking about her debt as his. If he is smart he run for the hills. I would not be surprise if this wiman even love him it this point. She not talking about being a helpmate in helping him out like a proverb women. You can tell by the way she talks she live way above and over her means and hoping he will care and buy for everything. I seen woman like this before and my dad fall for this game and my coworker with his gold digger wife. They both left than years later in the marriage after they debts was paid by hey made new and bigger ones, when they found other sugar daddy that had more money that was willing to take them, leaving the man with a huge bag. There was red flags before they got marry all gold digger leave big red flag without them tell him about they debts.
Notice how she's hedging her answers; she's evasive and it sounds shady. Husband needs to run....now....
It doesn't sound shady, it sounds complicated. Shes trying to do whats best for all of her family without affecting any one individually negative. Thats going to be impossible as she learns what she needs to do, but shes not being shady by working her way to that realization. Grow up. She called Dave because she needs help doing the right thing, not because she wants to defraud her husband.
Let me guess, you're not like this 😄
@@JD-qo7hm Ahh poor guy white knighting for females who would watch you die 😄 you'll learn your lesson soon enough, remember me.
@@WonderBoy0403 Whatever you say, bud.
run and hide in a cave. its cool being single. you dont need a woman ever.ever....i love being solo.
I have a feeling that a good chunk of her student loans were additional loans given to her parents.
I bet you’re right I didn’t even think of that
My wife and I seperated our finances after about 10 years. Shw worked, I was semi retired. I had additional funds elsewhere. I paid the mortgage. She paid the bills. We are happy.
Send mom and dad home. Problem solved. This husband should just bail and run now, he's being used as an ATM.
some cultures expect you to care for their family etc..its bullshitttttt...i been there, its crazyyyyyy as fugggg...this dude should run away now.
@@thecastle09 The brother living on the property rent free can take care of his parents when they move back.
@@larrybud YES!!!!!!!!
He’ll eventually bail, but not before she gets hooks in with a child or two. . .
What do you call a lazy woman's retirement plan? MARRIAGE!
Yeah, she lied to the husband is what it sounds like.
Another bait n switch song. See how she puts it on him not them!
if you have dealt with many liars and/or compulsive liars as well, you can tell she is lying by the tone in her voice as she tries to answer his straight forward questions with complicated responses that lend to the "story". at least...that has been my experience...
@@johnroberson1157 you can hear the smiling when he mentions vows. She came on here to have herself validated.
More than likely she told him, but men tend to get blinded by the allure of foreign women
EcClair Mayo the allure of $111,000 in student loan debt and being an ATM for your undocumented in laws? That allure? I agree with OP. She lied and sprung this on him after marriage. It’s why he’s keeping things separate. He should get out now before he has kids with her or she sends him to the poor house.
Conclusion, he got suckered in!
Ramsey’s advice was spot on. I think they should move back
why don't they sell the house here too that they can't afford? they should be renting at 80 if they can't, or like you and dave said move back.
Have the parents move back to their house in another country, and have the brother who lives in that house take care of the parents....problem solved. Come on, this isn't rocket science.
Agreed. There's way more family supports there, it seems. If health care access is an issue, however, travel costs back to the US may have to be factored in.
Agreed. If they move back to Central America they can probably support them 100% and it’d be way less than here in the U.S. if no one else is willing to chip in.
Plus, if they keep the house in the family, then all the siblings and their children will always have a place to live, no one worrying about ever being homeless, if times get rough. Or rent it out if no one is living in it, and have an extra income for someone in the family. I honestly think it's the worst advice to sell the house.
I think you knew Dave Ramsey in a former life.. good answer!
Its just simple steps.
1. Sell your parents home in America
2. Move your parents back to central America with the brother
3. Let parents live off the profit from the home sale and the parents social security
4. Have siblings chip in a minimum $50 to help parents live comfortable.
5. Come back and forth to America for healthcare.
I love how Dave switched teams so quickly as this lady told more of the story
He always sides with the woman.
Not this time.
He’s usually a simp.
it was awesome
Thankfully the woman was honest
Why would you combine your finances? What a mess.
The husband made a mistake marrying this woman. I HIGHLY Doubt he knew the specifics of her debt and how much she gave her parents every month.
she threw the puddin at him HARD..
There are 8 children. Each person can give the parents $250 a month.
They all live paycheck to paycheck and one is over seas which gets paid less. I say they say the house the parents are living in . Move them back to Belize and they can live off the equity from the house or rent it out .
Parents can pay their own way
They are not living paycheck to paycheck. They can all easily cut down their expenses to chip in at least $100 each. They just don't want to because the caller is foolishly footing the bill for their part.
You missed the point where they're broke living in central america. $250/month in central america is probably equivalent to $1500 per month in america
Whitney W. You missed the point. They have 30 months income sitting in the house there. They should move back.
She's going to end up divorcing...the hubby is going to get fed up. Shes moving back with the parents. She's NOT going to talk to her siblings...shes NOT STRONG enough to speak up.
she will divorce as soon as she either had a child or is married long enough to get alimony.
No, she will get a divorce and the poor man is going to be up to the eyeballs in alimony and his life is going to be ruined.
@Zechs Merquise "he or she" either one, I just don't see this marriage working out. They're taking 2 dffrnt paths.
@@seanlynch2579 we are NOT all like this... Thats a bit over exaggerating 🤦
Ay bendito!! Female Psychology:
Money: "What's mine is mine, what's yours is mine!"
Student loans: What's mine is yours, what's yours is...Hun, that's yours!
~Bachelor...I Stand Alone...I got my " Table", Ms. I hope you "own" one as well...bendiciones!
He needs to speak with an attorney to start the process of divorcing
Daughter thinks this codependency is normal.
Was the lack of boundaries clear to new huddy before they got married? :/
I agree with the husband, do NOT combine finances. Heck no!
It's already too late, her liabilities are his. I don't know why anyone marries someone with these kind of financial ties especially when they are sinking.
The husband needs to bail , before junior enters the equation .
100%
Word
@Brian The Explorer It might be best to cut ties now for half and keep what you make for yourself for the rest of your life after splitting
Brian The Explorer better then paying her parents rent and paying her 100k in student loan debt , sounds too me like she doesn’t have a clue of anything going on
Sounds like 90 day fiance
Studying in the US sounds so crazy. 110.000 debt just for a certificate. Now it takes the rest of your life to pay it off 😬 💀
The more I listen to Dave's show, the more I feel like I never ever want to get married.
😁😁😅
Right! 😂🤣😂🤣
Your logic is sound. Marriage simply isn't worth it no matter what but even more so when you're a man and lose half your stuff in the divorce. Oh and over 50% of marriages end in divorce and 70% of divorces are initiated by women so the odds are stacked against you from the get go.
@@davem4193 Life is not worth it because you die. 100% of life ends in death. Okay it's called living, making wise decisions, and living biblically. 🤯🤯🤯
@@SarahR2D2 yes making wise decisions involves not betting half of all your assets that she's going to love you forever. I was married once for 12 years, one marriage was enough for my lifetime. I'm much happier divorced thank you.
Wouldn't it be far cheaper for her parents to live back home? Cost of living here in the U.S. is insane.
That's crazy. I'm assuming they've been in the US for many years and still didn't try to fix their status there. Every 80 year old should have a security number and get retirement money.
Now it's only logical that they move back home where it's affordable. Her brother can also take care of them while the other siblings chip in.
@@savannahbyrd7884 Belize has pretty good/comparable healthcare from what I can find.
Or move to a cheaper part of the country.
@@savannahbyrd7884 You can get good healthcare in the US... But it costs more than anywhere else in the world. Anywhere.
@deadend I agree with you that the US is a great country to live in but I am from west Africa and Its beautiful there, I know Belize is similar in climate and culture. With little you can live the life of luxury. 1K to her parents each month is 2k in Belize and since they own their own house, that would be a grand life with little bills. Her parents and her are not using their heads. Its a disgrace! Her parents are 80+, what are they still doing here? Her family is taking advantage. Poor husband.
102k income total? .. I wonder how much of that is his and how much is hers?🤔...
And her dept is 5x his debt... This guy got a raw deal
😂 ikr
Rawwwwww
Take the money and run
Well as Dave would say once you're married it's not his or hers it's ours because you're married
She might be very attractive or...he is very desperate.
We need pictures and the put a dollar number on things.
Then sell things.
Or whatever financial gurus say...
I have a crystal ball and can see the future. After he pays off all her debt and gives her parents tons of money, she's suddenly going to start feeling like she needs to "find herself." This dude is an ATM and nothing more.
Greed isn’t part of marriage she doesn’t love you she love your money
When I stopped helping my ex wife’s family and told her to get a real job I soon after got a divorce. People like this only hold you back.
It’s not his responsibility to support your family, honey!!!!!
It is now, since they got married. If she lied, I'd end it and be gone.
@@jimroscoviuswrong! Her siblings are NOT helping out! It’s not his responsibility to pay for his in-laws bills!
@@chuckgoodman3828 I agree the siblings need to help out. I get that it's not all their responsibility. But he married her, which means they are in this together, unless she lied to him. Whatever they decide to do, they are in it together. His only other choice is to leave.
“Did he say for rich and for poor” “did he mean it” “so you give money to your family without asking your husband”
This guy is great. Literally no bias, just marriage and dollar signs.
This guy needs a divorce as quickly as possible--he obviously wasn't told about any of this. Including her huge student loan.
Divorce in 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1
blast offf and run away bro.
Cowards. Both of you.
Stop making stupid decisions & take responsibility for your own choices. No one put a gun to this guy's head, he went in there knowing full well what was going on. It's not right for him to bail now, but he definitely needs to get a handle on family issues & learn how to lead the family instead of being a spineless coward.
The world doesn't need any more useless, cowardly people in it.
@@MeanOldLady let's make one thing clear here, he is NOT responsible for HER debt or HER parents. SHE is. If anything SHE Is the coward for not taking care of her own debt and taking charge of her family.
Yes, but he’ll hear the words “ we’re expecting”. Before he gets away free.
@@aharrison9972 LOL !
She keeps saying he is hesitant to merge finances, but the reality is he is adamant and doesn't want to.
Adamant and wont
Nice marriage
She is afraid of the blow back from all sides.
After finding out his wife is sending their money to her parents, do you blame him?????
Marrying someone and expecting that person to take on your debt or ongoing obligations to someone else is B.S.
It’s better for your parents to stay in their home country where your bother can take care of them. You can send money every month to supporters them $200 .
Indeed. Sorry to say but they have no entitlement whatsoever to live in a high cost country. Move back where the cost of living is low or get a job yourself in the US.
She talking about merging their income but You can't merge finances when the other side has no finances. It should be retitled my husband won't give me his money to enable my family's irresponsible decisions.
This lady seems to be in a rush to combined those finances. The husband needs to RUN!!!
She's in a hurry to combine there dept lol not finances
Yeah this dude is being smart while she’s being in denial
@@sinbadx2902 ...Can you even do that with student debt? All the debt i came into my marriage with is still only in my name, and only debts we've accrued together in both of our names. I'm not sure if any of it even could be "combined". I wanted to get her a couple of cards and asked just to be sure that they wouldn't make her liable, and they said that I am the only guarantor on the debt and issuing another card in her name wouldn't change that, only if we applied for a rate increase with both of our names on the application or something like that. A friend of mine came into his marriage with student debt and even though he payed 90% of their expenses all throughout the marriage with the jobs he got because of that education, when it ended he took the student debt with him. The judge only split the assets down the middle(which of course she tried to over-inflate the value of his assets, so he had to pay her the difference), but the debt was kept by whoever's name it was in(him).
He got smart to late .He should have found this out before he married a money pit.
I was engaged to a woman in my mid 30's that had student loan debt. I told her she would need to show responsibility in paying that down before there was any marriage. I suggested we lay all of our finances on the table and go to a financial planner. I made it clear i was going to be in charge of the money and finances. She left. I dodged a bullet. This guy was an idiot for marrying this person.
I had the same experience. My fiancé was all about the spending for this and that, but not interested in how to pay for it. I was called overbearing before she left. That was 25 years ago and I am now thankful it played out that way.
"I made it clear that I was going to be in charge of the money and finances" 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
Sounds like you both dodged a bullet....
I can't imagine being a grown ass woman and someone else tells me they're going to manage my finances 😂 marriage is a trip, man....I don't get it
Husband needs a divorce attorney .
First mistake he made was getting married
I would never join my money together with this person. She seems irresponsible and silly minded!! This is the type of marriage that breaks up over finances. He needs to get out of this marriage...it was a big mistake.
mdooms76 Yes. It sounds like her #1 priority is her parents, not her husband/marriage.
mdooms76 what make it even worse her says it with her own mouth, her family which include her, are horrible when it comes to money.
This is common with immigrant families, including my own. One or two siblings here in the states supporting an entire lazy brood back home. Things came to a sudden stop when my grandma passed away, they resented my father and aunt for cutting them off. Good on my pops.
Hubby went in TAKING ON 100K of Student Debt - AND She expects him to help pay parents?
she's taking food out of the mouths of their future children - That's THEIR Family
She wanted a sugar daddy and a provider not a husband. This woman is the worst type of woman. He needs to take his loss and run.
"lets pretend you were broke"
- "We dont have to pretend"
LOLL
The only sensible thing she said
I can certainly see why she wanted to get married.
she was in deep love. Thats the problem with women. They love too hard .
@@signorpops8520 In love with money
Life insurance,hubby is about to have a little accident.
@@signorpops8520 lol timely sarcasm..
This is a valuable and necessary lesson. I doubt the guy knew all this or did not listen. Some may say I am heartless because my advice would be cut bait and run. The parents could move back to their home and be near the other kids. Did the wife get a good paying job after 100k debt? 2 incomes with only 80k net could be achieved without college. I am 81 years old grandma. Both my husband and I grew up poor, no college, good work ethic, lived well within our means and doing fine. We are Blessed. Common sense is the key. This is a fixable disaster. Mary
I have never shared finances with a woman and I never will!
exactly I've been married for 25 years and we have always had our own accounts and a joint account to pay common bills with. and she has always paid her half. (pretty unique in this day and age. I got super lucky with this keeper. but then we didn't get married till we were in our thirties so had established careers, no debt, and a good set of personal boundaries)
They should not have married before settling how this would be handled. I am a woman, but firmly on his side on this one.
I'm a woman too and he is in the right. I wonder if she even told him?
Me too. On his side.
@Anthony Bush Not to mention she sounds like she clearly has no guts to tell her brother to move out. If she can't handle one sibling, I doubt she can stand up against the rest.
I also feel the same way and I am also a woman.
I doubt she discussed this with him OR she did, but was passive about it and did what she wanted anyway. If she can't talk to any one of her 7 siblings that she grew up with about something as serious as helping her parents survive, what can convince us that she's going to talk to her husband about anything?
Here’s what I heard: “So I tricked this new guy into marrying me by pretending I love him and now he refuses to pay off my enormous debt and give half of his paycheck to my freeloading family! What do I do, Dave?”
JJ Anthony Pretty much! 🤣🤣🤣
Bingo
That's sounds about right
After a few months it’ll be what should I do Steve or Jerry, Maury or your honor
Also: "My original 5 year plan was to divorce him after he paid off my loan. This has set me back by at least a couple years."
This guy got a raw deal
I never would of married her knowing her debt severely outweighed mine, AND I'd have to support her parents.
It looks like she is a scammer.
Husband needs to divorce her so she can stay focused on paying her parents' mortgage and helping the other loser siblings.
No, annul instead. Divorce means that she could still be entitled to alimony or other support after marital dissolution
Whew, this guy married himself to an anchor...
She’s not anchor, he handcuffed himself to a wowman in cement overshoes...
Too many women see men as a way to pay off their debt.
He wasn't there when you took the loans out, PAY YOUR OWN DEBT!
If the husband actually called in...
Dave: Sell the wife. Sell the wife. 🤣
Dave is a great, but but he's a white knight, he sees women in the,romantic old ways,
He tells ppl to get divorced?!?
He would tell him to have her selling pizzas! 😂
@Thelondonbadger get one that brings some thin g to the table
Shes carries more debt than her husband, her family is taking HER on a financial ride and this all some how equates to being her husband's fault...? Intriguing 🤔
MyNameIsCorey Probably has a liberal arts degree.
Who said it was the husband's fault besides you?🤔
@spot light to be fair, chinese math is the same everywhere
He was nuts to marry someone with 111k of school debt in the first place! The family situation is just the icing on the cake. Run!
She is a good daughter while the rest of the siblings give a great example why having kids will not always pan out
By pan out do you mean that kids are meant to be a retirement plan rather than parents being responsible and planning for their retirement?