Married to someone with DID | Live Q&A with Gaz!
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- Опубліковано 6 жов 2024
- Let's hope it all goes okay!
We apologise for any lateness, not turning up and/or just things going wrong!
Thank you for being so patient! We're looking forward to talking to everybody and answering those burning questions you may have about DID!
I just have to say, Gaz is like the perfect husband. He's so patient and understanding and loveable. When he said he hadn't had any arguments with any of them, I was just amazed. Such a patient guy.
And jess knew he was the guy when gaz said when can I meet them
I just love how validating Gaz seems to be. That must be so great for both Jess and the boys to have someone that is just so... omg I don´t know what to say in english. In swedish we call it "självklar", which mean to be natural with someone... as if nothing special is up. I think evrybody should act like that, and it´s nice to see someone that does it naturally.
that IS a perfect word to describe Gaz! and now I'm stuck on finding an English translation for it.
How do you pronounce that word? I love it!
that’s so cool thanks for sharing !!
@@20Unbelievable06 maybe the word is genuine?
Maybe the word is fit for them?
You guys are my introduction to DID and it is absolutely fascinating. Thank you so much for sharing and being so candid. Gaz you sound like an amazing guy! I wish you all the very best!
Gaz is not even amazing....he is more than that, there should be more words for describing a person that is phenomenal, amazing, caring, loving, angel,... that does accept you for who you are. not everyone has a person like that. and he is lucky. he has the best family he can wish for.
Sooo, when Gaz mentionned Ollie in Diaries of a Broken Mind, I wanted to rewatched it, so I paused this video and googled it real fast... But the most shoking change I can't help but notice is Gaz's hair. Talk about a difference!
Gaz, you, Jess, and the guys all have such warm and inviting personalities. And I can't wait to see Ollie livestream :)
Hi Jamie, Ollie, Jessica, Jake and Ed ^^
It's been a while that my alters and me are following you all and enjoy watching how you destroyed DID stereotypes and shows it as a way of life, not as a "trouble". You guys (and Gaz too! ^--^) are absolutely awesome and it's a pleasure to be a part of your community (even if this is the first time I'm writing a comment)
I'm in a system of five siblings ( Kanna, Ranma, Shin, Eleonore and I) and our friends and family are knowing for it and treat us like we are: people and not "personnalities", just like Jess and Co.
But today and since nearly one year, ours relatives are noticing that me and Ranma (like the who in "this" manga yeah whatever) look like each other more and more in voice tone, facial expressions and even in attitude sometimes.
It's been months that they and my psychiathr all thinking that we maybe are going to melting earlier that we thought. Plus I recently got visions (I think) , pieces of a forgotten flashback while sleeping and we both often have nightmares that one of us (mostly him) is disappearing.
We asked Shin (our Internal Self Helper) and all of our closest people and they all says that it's gonna be okay, no need to be worried because nobody will died or disappear, but it's very hard to trust people who aren't living the thing, or accepting quotes such as "They are just dissociate parts of you, they will always live in your heart."
Ranma and I are knowing each other since ours 5 years old and now I'm 19 and he is 17 ( I grew quite faster, I know ^^) and even if we often have fights he is still my little brother and we all pay attention for each one.
We're afraid and not ready to do that but it seems that the moment is coming faster what matters we do. I don't want him to be vanished and he doesn't want to.
Please can somebody tell us what to do in the more enjoyable way for everyone, to keeping his body in our inner-world if we really have to integrate, or errased the processus?
Thank you for reading me, I hope that anybody will give me some advice, support, maybe answers. And please, excuse my language, I'm from France.
Post scriptum: I love you all and your videos; congratulations for your parcours.
Nils.
justhales Hello, my name is Kanna, I don't speak english very good because I am french but I know you are nice 😊😙 thank you for the helping, we talk to the psychologue and two best friends and they are conciliants like you. We are sad and scary because we have bad memories and the body of Ranma is disappear but I am sûre his soul is still here and also we have good memories. Thank you!!! 💜💙💖
@E.H. Indigo the whole point of therapy is to "merge" all alters in the end. At least that is what most therapists goal is.
@@audreymai2773 my therapist says she doesn't even believe complete integration is a realistic goal. She said that's a major issue of debate in the mental health world.
So sorry I missed this. I have DID and my fiancé and I are getting married this year. He’s so loving and supportive of us. I finally found our soulmate. Our fear is that we’re making his life hard and he will eventually resent us. I’m sorry I know that he isn’t like that and I know that we will make it. I just wanted to hear from a spouses point of view. Kinda for reassurance.
How are you managing a partner with multiple personalities? We really need to know because our dating lives have been terrible so far as we're essentially getting jellous of other person's in the same body.
"It won't be the full hour and a half we were hoping"
> 2 1/2 hr video upload of stream
I just have to say, I just came across this channel. And I am so happy you found each other. It's honestly like you were tailor made for them.
I remember how I first came across This channel. I was researching DID and trauma / survivors etc. I started watching this video with the gorgeous blonde blue eyed girl who was talking about how she met her partner, and having a son and the story captured me, it was a beautiful love story. It took me a second to realize however that it was the same person as the video was split between Jaime and Ed talking . I remember thinking to myself this condition is REAL , there is NO possible way this girl is acting ..... she would have to be the most talented actress in the world . Anyways here I am years later , I’ve followed you all since and will always do! Proud of your accomplishments, thank for your time and dedication and raising awareness !
Bless you both. I was abused as a child and suffer from PTSD and have blocks of time I can not remember. I can't imagine having to cope with DID I'm sure your wife considers you her biggest blessing
This Q&A is brilliant. Thanks for your insight and honesty Gaz... two years ago (I'm late to the party haha).
Japanese kintsugi (repairing pots with gold) is a beautiful metaphor for DID.
Watching this three years later and desperately wanting to ask a question! I hope I can catch the next livestream. Much love to Jess, Gaz and the lads!
Great job Gaz very informative Jess I bet will be proud.
Rewatching this march 21 and am still so much loving this. 🖤
Hahah, Gaz’s face of regret when he unintentionally dabbed 🤣❤️
Very well done, Gaz! Thank you for sharing your experiences and point of view!
Biggest smile on my face when you said you’d love to move out to LA!!! My home!!! Love to you and the boys and Jess and Evie !!! 💕💕💕Kisses from LA !!! 🏄🏽♀️
Lol when Gaz said Jake and Jamie’s son I actually cringed... I may be too invested in their life
Gaz you are such a sweetheart. Thank you so much for this
I've just got to say I love how much you, Jamie, and Ed are as fathers. So stinking sweet. I heard the comment about Ollie not being allowed to watch a show and I had to come on really fast and comment lmbo. That being said, I love how wonderful Jess is as a mom as well. You're all such a beautiful family, and such wonderful parents. I love y'all so much. I truly enjoy watching everyone so much and I feel like we're all friends sometimes. hehe. I wish that was true in real life. Sad face. hehe. Oh p.s. I adore Jake as a care taker/uncle too, and OF COURSE Ollie, just being Ollie. He's such a smart young dude with an awesome personality and I enjoy everyone and their unique personalities so much. hehe :)
Jess and the boys have really educated him well, big well done to you all 💕
Amazing live scream!!!! I was in class when this live stream started!! But I just spent two hour watching this as a break from school lol really informative and interesting!!
My husband is so happy to have come across your video. I have DID and he has been dying to talk to another spouse who is married to someone with DiD so he can have someone to talk to about this and learn the best way to communicate with me and alters. And advice from another spouse with experience so he can proceed appropriately. And im sure also to talk to someone else who gets it.
We just found out about my husband’s DID 2 weeks ago. I have met them each as they woke up. The key was to stay calm and respectful. Remember that they are each their own person and not my husband. I made that mistake at first and that took some adjusting of how my brain thinks to stop thinking of them that way. They each have their own likes and dislikes and I am trying to learn all I can about each of them. I love them all in different ways and they all care about me as well. I know that there may be an alter at some point who may not like me and that’s going to be hard but not all people get along. I think one of the hardest things for me is not knowing what is going on inside their headspace. I don’t know who might be listening in or if it’s a good time to be intimate or what they may be saying about me. I want to be respectful and need to learn about which questions are okay to ask and which would be rude or annoying.
Hi Gaz, Jamie, Ollie, Jessica, Jake and Ed :-)
You all seem to be made for each other. Thank you for sharing
Having a partner like you is truely gold. Just gold.
Awesome vid Gaz! It was awesome to get your views and advice. I just found a couple of new anime's we're gunna binge with the hubby :p
Thank you Gaz for answering me at 25:52 you're so sweet ^--^
this guy is a true hero. if yer reading this GAZ my hat is off to you.
I wonder if there are any avenues for DID in virtual reality and robotics? They might not be able to have "their own" body, but perhaps one day a virtual body will be realistic enough....?
Tiffany Fite black mirror!
The robot would still be just a copy of them, not them. We can't take them out of the system's brain entirely to put them in a machine.
This was absolutely amazing❤️
I really loved this cause I recently found out my boyfriend gage has an alter named ben and I love both of them but ben has been out a lot more so than gage and even ben is starting to worry that gage may have disappeared
Is he okay? Did he show up?
Did he come back. What will you do if he doesn't come back will you stay with Ben?
did he ever show up??
Ollie is so cute(sorry if that sounds condescending if you ever read this but it’s true. I’m the same age as you, I get it) He just has this great personality
I actually have a question. For any of the boys, really. What's it like being a male alter in a female body? (Sorry if it's really awkward, I'm just curious)
I imagine it's probably a lot like being a black man in the body of a white boy. I don't really know about the whole gender swap thing myself but from a racial perspective. I know physically that I'm while but my mental image of myself has always been African American. I like to joke with people saying I'm not white I'm just pale. Which is partially true as we were born with no pigment in our skin. What little color is there now is actually sun damage.
I think it would be very disphoric for the majority of them but then again idk
They probably feel like a trans person feels.. in the wrong body.
@@RialVestro Why does skin color matter in how you perceive yourself? If I got a dark tan, it wouldnt change who I am as a person. That is super shallow tbh. If I woke up with brown skin tomorrow, I would still be the same person, I would just have more protection from the sun. You are actually racist if you think about it.
@@audreymai2773 mabey its a cultural thing? like if you where born into an african family but had the condition albinism, then your interanl identity would conflict with your external apperance. while techinally you are 'black' your skin would conflict with that fact. happens alters a lot
You are awesome, Gaz!
Wow Gaz this was just such a great video. Thanks for sharing all the info. Say hi to Jess and the boys
from me in Australia
Gaz you are AWESOME and very Validating. sending a Huge Hug from Toronto, Ontario, Canada.
Hey, you did great! i couldn't stay for the whole thing but i enjoyed this a lot.
Love to you all from Central Florida! (about 40 minutes from Disney 😊) This was such a well done Q&A! I think it's absolutely fantastic how much awareness is being raised and how much community driven support this has gained globally! I've loved getting to know everyone as individuals and can't wait to see where this road will take you personally and professionally.
Thank you for sharing this Gaz. I´m gonna scower your channel for any streams that is more recent than this one. I feel a bit behind. lol.
What if one of the alters fell in love/lust with someone in the outer world and wanted a physical relationship with them. How would you react Gaz?
Ed and Jamie are together, Ollie in a different vid said hes Asexual, and it was said that Jake had a gf in world. thats what i know but saying most of the vids were from last year or so on i dont know about now. but Ed and Jamie will always be together thats true love there.
Thanks so much. I get behind why a friendship with a system ended and I will learn to become better thanks to youtube :)
Wow, when you talked about how we all dissociate, me and my friends I explain DID to actually *did* notice that we all do that, and we thought that we might have DID and some shy alter coming out xD Thanks for clearing that up!
Just to clarify - you can dissociate and have dissociation & depersonalization without having DID (or alters). One example is anxiety- dissociation is a common side effect. Sometimes we just run on autopilot.
Hey Jess, et al and Gaz. I am a paranoid schizophrenic and my significant other has DID, we work really really well and seem to just fit but why it works eludes us. Do you think having complexed issues yourself helps navigate the relationship? I’m interested in how you guys seem to work so well, would be very interested to hear both yours and gaz’s experience and thoughts on this. Thanks, Ad
Hi from Chicago! Y'all are awesome.
What a wonderful man.
When UA-cam doesn't give you a notif ;w; I had a reminder set too
Since Jess doesn't have access to the inner world, where does she go/what happens to her when she switches?
I missed the live stream but this question kept coming to mind. Do all the alters share the same birthday with Jess or are they all different/ age differently?
Jess Cosgrave They have have their own ages, birthdays, and relationships. Ed and Jaime are married, Olly is their son, and Jake is Jamie's Brother.
We just use the same birthday as the original. I honestly can't remember when I first appeared and I don't think the others can either. I know about what year but as for an exact day I have no idea and it makes the most sense to me at least that my birthday should be the first day I became active as that's kinda like when I was born. But we weren't even diagnosed at that time and I didn't think about it.
The actually have a video about this now.
Your an amazing dude!! Such a sweetheart!!!
44:16 on dissociating, I really get that way playing rhythm games. I zone out on longer songs and by the end I get startled back to being "awake" or when im going to school semi sleepy, I have a 2 hours train ride that sometimes just feels like I traveled through time because seemingly out of nowhere I arive at my station.
Please do another one of these....
Gaz is just so awesome omg
How does Jess fit into the inner world when she isn't fronting? I know that the boys are all a family and that they interact with each other in the inner world, does jess have a relationship with them in the inner world when she's there?
Also, I know that in other videos you guys have explained that when you are fronting you can "look in" but in the inner world you guys don't really know about the outer world. Do you guys bring your memories of what happened while you were fronting back with you to the inner world (like do you remember Gaz when you are in the inner world) or do you only have those types of memories when you are fronting?
I really loved hearing Gaz's perspective in the live stream, as well as everyone's perspectives in the videos and other live streams. I just love how you all interact together! I just wish I had been able to go on the live stream in person when it was happening because I couldn't have asked my question in real-time. Glad that I've found the channel now though!
I want to meet them all. They're all so nice to watch here.
Finally getting an response about WHO Gaz is(SORRY new subscriber from Oklahoma and I've asked a few times and no response)
Gaza, do you ever think of your life with Jess and her alters as being a very lucky guy, with a large inner family? It's like you have 6 people living with you!!
NOOOO HE SAID OLLIE LOVES ADVENTURE TIME AND REGULAR SHOW AND THEY BOTH ENDED 😭😭 what was Ollie’s reaction?
im looking forward to seeing and hearing from you gaz are you ok
Hi. So my significant other has DID. And the past 2 years we have been fighting because one of the alters had cheated. But now the host and I are on good terms but one of his alters hates me and holds trauma from when we were fighting. Keep in mind I had no idea that he had DID while he was secretly cheating on me or that it was his alter who was doing this. The host didn’t even know what was happening. What do I do to make the alter trust me more? Do I just accept that the alter hates me and there’s not much I can do about it? Thanks.
I really like Gaz, he's p cool
I wish someone would've asked some harder hitting questions like "Is it considered cheating in your relationship if you kiss an alter?" or "If an alter were to kiss someone else, or fall in love with someone else, how would you feel about that? Would that be cheating?"
GAZ! lol ..hello to you & everyone else as well :)
One of my alters doesn't have a name. He doesn't think it's important to have a name for himself. He was completely devoted to protecting our original host and has sense gone into deep depression after failing his job. The rest of us have names. Either given to us or chosen. My name Harrey Dames was given to me... Not really a fan of that name it sounds like a hairy woman. But whatever. Harrey is ok, I don't use the last name too often.
This was really great
I just missed it...
Edit: And I'm from New Zealand. 🙂
Same i missed it and i'm in Aust. Can't be helped though i don't think. I love that they upload them though so we still get to see it :D
Wibble Wobble Yeah, that is pretty nice tbh (I just watched the whole thing in one go - when it first finished). :)
I have Alters named Jamie and Ollie
But my Ollie’s name is “Oliver” who prefers Ollie and he has a fragment named Oscar.
ollie’s name is oliver too lol!
Yay Gaz!
Oh Ed. Classic goth.
If Jess disappeared, is she concerned about Jake's dysphoria and possibly wanting a sex change?
Isn't he Jamie and Ed's son, not Jamie and Jake's son...? xD
yes, and Gaz did correct himself (after Ollie corrected him xD)
Our 15 year old alter with ADHD loves gumball it's bloody hilarious to see him watch it 😂
I relate so well to not knowing how i met someone
I'm not trying to be disrespectful or invasive in any way at all but I'm curious as to the relationship between you guys. For example Gaz started dating Jess, Ed and Jamie are a couple in the inner world but when Ed is out Gaz and him still act like a couple so is that like cheating on Jess with Ed or like cheating with Gaz with Jamie or something. I dont know but I'm just asking out of curiosity. Good day x
Everyone is aware of the situation between Gaz and Ed, and Jamie and Jess are ok with it. Therefore it’s not cheating.
Where can I watch One Punch Man? And can you recommend any other anime? My oldest son is VERY into anime and ai promised him I would give it a go..but I a, seriously struggling to find something (okay, to be fair I haven’t tried incredibly hard..but Idek where to watch it!) so please, give your suggestions!! Thank you!
So are you dating Ed and Jamie as well as Jess?
He's married to Jess, mates with Jamie, but they do kiss and cuddle and he has a romantic relationship with Ed.
My birthday is in October also it is on 20th
i have 17 alters and my partner are in another fight help his name is ric he will not speak to me what do i do Babs
A question for Jess, but really for anyone who can answer: i just stumbled onto your channel and have only watched a video or two but am curious (if you know or if there is a reason or no reason) as to why the alters are all boys (from the video i watched) while at least from a viewers perspective you appear decidedly female?
I very much enjoyed the videos i have seen and plan to watch more and i find them both entertaining and interesting ❤️🇨🇦
She felt as a child that whatever happened to her wouldn't have happened if she were a boy. So all of her alters are boys.
So Ollie calls Jamie daddy and Ed dad so are Jamie and Ed together or are they just the parents or care takers of Ollie? Could someone answer this
They’re together :)
MultiplicityAndMe Cool Thank You
Can't hear you very good...
The first and only time I switched almost a year ago my husband was super alienated and it was obvious to my parts. They won't come out now. He is a loving man. I am just not sure he knows how to react. I need him to be welcoming for my parts to cooperate or communicate. I am in therapy and do have a diagnosis. Do you have any advice on how to approach this?
Have you made any progress with this or are you still looking for advice?
@@sararush6951 my therapist says I assimilated. Idk. I am super happy and healthy so I am.l just enjoying it.
Noooooo I missed the stream 😥
Who id Little vs. Jake?
Gaz is amazing
Gaz..... Super hard question, but, I heard a question about Jess disappearing..... But, if Jess disappeared permanently, would you ever end the marriage?
if Jess was to "disappear", Jake would be the one taking over, and since he's a straight man, that probably would end the marriage.
I don't know much about DID (mostly what I learned from you channel). But it seems like you're all against integration, and I was wondering why. Isn't the goal supposed to be (when you're ready of course) final fusion? Why wouldn't it be? It must suck for Jess to miss out on parts of her life. I understand the benefits, and the fun part, but why wouldn't the ultimate goal be a non " broken mind"?
alwayzjello in the US a lot of therapists have moved away from believing integration can even happen. The system can get free from past scenes and get into 2018 or the present, thus getting free and getting better, but integration doesn't happen according to current thought here. Possible explanation as to why someone thinks parts have intigrated, but haven't actually, can be varied. Some parts handle certain seasons for the ritual or medical group they belong to, and are seasonally iced. Summer alters vs school year alters etc. handlers or programmers also might ice parts behind walls, in encasements etc...with any especially deviant scenes they are trying to hide permanently. Anyway once a multiple always a multiple according to counselors here in the US.
.
i have 14 in my crew(System), they are parts of me and each has their own function, i am still in a moderately unstable situation and as long as that remains so will they. True integration is difficult because you must uncover all the alters, all the memories, and effectively resolve all the trauma AND be living in a stable reality for it to work. I don't forsee that happening in my lifetime.
You know... The alters are there for a reason. And that reason is really difficult to deal with. It would be scary for systems that are personally close to integrate, because they wouldn't exactly be ‘themselves’, they’d be ‘one’. While us people without DID see that as a GOOD thing, that’s only because we haven’t gone through what they have. It's good to have friends that help you, and in that case, those friends would be part of you. Wouldn’t that be scary and sad, loosing a friend?
With intergration you also have to face those memories that are blocked out for a reason from my understanding.
Does anyone know of any celebrities that have DID?
Can someone explain inner world to me? Do the other alters have their own parents different from Jess’s?
Deysi Marquez yes! They have an entire inner world and each alter has a different backstory with different parents and friends in their inner world.
does Jake have a facebook page we can follow?
Try Detroit become human on play station.
I'd love to meet some fragments.
So I have my phone volume all the way up and captions on and still can't hear him at all
I'm curious about Gaz's relationship with Ed. Like do they kiss? I know Ed's taken but he's also the sexual alter...
They do kiss, they did in a video where Ed is cooking chicken. His first kiss with Jess actually wasn't with Jess, he didn't know she had did at that time so he didn't know that he was kissing another alter. I don't really remember if he talked about his sexual relationship with Ed spexifically on video though, sorry.
@@trekadouble757 thank you for this!
My birthday is OCT 16th
this is Babs i have 17 personalities my partner and i are fighting again over a stupid lighter he uses the silent treatment we have been together for over 13 years i am 57 and my partner is 62 i am not sure antmore if
As someone with diagnosed ADHD (inattentive type) Gaz definitely seems to have at least some degree of ADHD, from what I've seen of him.
I know someone with this
Dude...almost a whole 5 minutes of nothing! Weird