I can guarantee its not the first time he's done this routine. Don't parrot what other people on here say. Unless you're only interested in. getting likes.
How does he come up with this stuff??! The first time I saw him, I laughed till I cried. My late husband did too (and we never agreed on ANYthing) When I think of comedians Billy Connolly is at the top of the list, and has been since the early 80s
@@jumbo7165 If you'd seen him more than once you'd realise he doesn't tell the same stories over and over again. When he starts telling a story he assumes he's told it before and so removes and add things to it when he's onstage.
Billy is a genius. I have loved him for many years. Saw him at Hammersmith Apollo nearly 20 years ago. I wish I hadn't bothered with mascara! I started crying with laughter 5 minutes in.
The Best Comedian that’s ever lived. Seen Billy when he came home on tour. I remember laughing the whole show with my Dad and after the show couldn’t remember some of the stories we where laughing at. Amazing
How lucky we are to have been around at the same time as Billy Connolly. Without doubt the Best of the Best. EVER!!! God bless him for making us all laugh until we cried, usually at ourselves. I can't really find the superlatives which would begin to do the man justice. The Last King of Scotland
I love that he brings back the Old black shirt . It's magical in the sense of bringing more of his youth into him . Like a old country song about your Wife said I thought I through that out. His favorite old Army shirt . Like a favorite shirt you only go fishing in. Because you caught a big one in it once. 😁
Billy I am reading your book which i got for christmas. Saw you many years ago and my ribs ached for days after. Thank you for the laughs and the memories
Oh my god my friggin sides hurt and my jaw is locked from laughing so hard tears are runnin down my cheeks!!! holy shit he’s funny. He’s a friggin riot!!!
His story telling is a work of art. Have just finished work for Chrimbo Hols and what a treat to start the holidays with, a bit of Billy Connolly. Merry xmas Billy and Pamela and family. Thank you for the sacrifices you made in the name of comedy.
@@thephoenixsystem6765 Aztecs invented pouring balsamic vinegar on their dicks? Man, no wonder they couldn't stand up to Cortez; they must've all been writhing on the floor in agony.
He did this set on the Craig Ferguson show, like 15 years ago and I was in tears and pain from laughing so hard. The clip was around for a bit but eventually CBS decided to delete it 🙄 Craig was laughing his ass off, so proud of his idol, but he knew the network was gonna hate it and he seemed defeated that there was no way they'd get the joke. I've been looking for it for soooo long, thanks for uploading!
He is pure natural gold! I think he has a rough idea how he will start the show, but then he wanders off as other memories come to him. He laughs hysterically at his own mishaps, and the mishaps of others, and although he describes in detail some of his experiences, for some reason he never comes across as being vulgar. Only he can get away with this! Two of my favourites are about the husband who buried his wife in the shed with her bottom sticking out. The explanation was, that the husband needed somewhere to park his bicycle. The other one was his account of the wildebeests being stalked by two lions. Hysterically funny! I wonder how he is doing now in 2024.
I knew someone who used to get naked if conversation flagged. But the gold medal goes to a friend of my sister. I was visiting her for the first time after she moved from the family home and she brought me to her local pub. She introduced me to her new friends "This is Michelle, she works behind the bar. Tony, he works at the post office.... "etc. I'm kinda like Prince Phillip at a tour of the fig rolls factory nodding and half heartedly saying pleasantries until she gets to one fella "... and this is Phil, he's got a cube shaped testicle..." I'm going through the motions when it dawns on me what my sister has just said and I stop dead and just ask "Whaaaaat?". At this point Phil whips out his ballbag. And despite my best efforts and my inner voice screaming 'Don't fucking look' I fucking glanced down... and there it was, the cuboid nut. Not slightly cuboid, it really was distinctly cuboid. So there I am, standing in a pub with a group of strangers, gazing in awe at this one guys who's proudly displaying his freakishly geometrically shaped bollock like a prizewinning vegetable in the village fete and all I could think of saying was 'Does that thing actually fucking work?' Apparently the answer is 'yes' as he has 6 kids.
I don't know what I expected to hear about a salad bar but it certainly wasn't THAT! Absolutely hysterical. And it wouldn't surprise me at all if one of his pals doing that also was Steve Buscemi.😁
I just love the UA-cam channel Billy has started, but my greatest wish is for the World Tours he did to come to digital format on iTunes. We simply need more of Billy everywhere.
The World Tours DVDs should be available on Amazon in the UK. When they appear on iTunes is another matter, if they appear at all. Oh and Billy didn't start the channel, I think it's a fan club that started it. He hates all social media.
Being a half Italian half Scottish American born in the south and raised in the suburban Midwest, I find this man to be one of the funniest men in history.
Absolute genius , thank goodness I've been lucky to have seen him live on 4 occasions 😂😂😂😂 taking over a week for my body to stop aching from so much laughter 😂🥰😂🥰😂🥰😂🥰
I love the way he went "So" as if he hadn't just referenced Silence Of The Lambs and putting balsamic vinegar on your important bits, only Billy, only Billy Fuckin' Connolly
One time we (hubby, daughter and herpartner at the time ) saw him at the Sydney Opera House, my daughter laughed so much she almost brained herself on the balcony rail laughing that much.
Watched Billy's Great American trail last night and dreamt of Billy all night. The dreams were so vivid (he ran a B&B, lol) that I felt I knew him. I cannae tell you how disappointed I was when I woke up and realized it was all dreams. I loved being in Billy's world. 🏴
I've forgotten some of the details, but I remember the joy. Thankfully there's YT for some of it, and I'll wear out my copies of Mrs. Brown and Unfortunate Events. ❤️
@@Elonmuskateer What you posted was gibberish. That's how to do it properly. The name is Welsh. The fact that you named yourself after that wanker speaks volumes.
The great thing about this is, that now we can all go ask A-listers: "have you ever seen any of Billy Connolly's bits?" The ones who start blushing, you'll know they've been to an Edinburgh festival buffet.
Billy, I'm not one to interject into people's lives but do you remember being at Newcastle Central Station with Maggie and a couple of snotty nosed kids. You asked if this train went to Berwick and the guy said yes. But he failed to mention it didn't actually stop there. We ended up in Edinburgh. Funny childhood memories.
Jaymack I first saw Billy live in a Portmahomack saloon bar in the North East of Scotland, this was about 1972 before he was well known; he was about 3ft from our table and had made at least one LP record. I don't remember much about his act though. I often wonder if he remembers playing there; no booking needed. Now I think he relied too much on swearing as part of his act.
Ah yes, the salad bit. Idk which came first, the one here or when he was with his padawan Craig Ferguson. Vinaigrette in your trousers. Good ol days ay...
It must be so difficult being Billy Connolly purely because people just EXPECT him to be incredibly funny all the time, and the only chance he'll get to just relax and be himself is when he's with his own close friends and family.
You think balsamic is bad, 😂😂😂😂 My mate worked the restaurant biz many years, one day a colleague was on a busy night they had & his main task that night was chopping peppers 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🔪 But for some unknown reason he forgot to don gloves! Then he took a long awaited break to pee!!! Screams, could be heard for miles 😂😂😂😂😱😱😱😱😱😱
He's worth watching just to see what hes wearing. Lol. I love the Beetlejuice pants. And if course having your willy in a Gin and Tonic is taking it too far Billy.... Because it wasn't a "Fruit and Salad Bar" or an "Open Bar". 😁
Homer Simpson once sang a song called "you don't win friends with salad" but I imagine it would be a very different song if it was cock salad he was singing about.
Billy is nothing less than a worldwide treasure. So glad I was able to see him perform live onstage. What a treat. 👍🏽
Did he offer you a Willy salad ? 😀
@@Shadow6taka How did you know?!
@@A_Final_Hit 😜
I am immensely jealous. I never got to see him perform.
Oh, I'm jealous. My 80-something parents saw him twice in LA, but I never did. Wishing Billy good health...
Billy Connolly Is The Greatest Stand Up Comedian Of All Time. 🏴
And “6” is the greatest number of all time:)
@@jimshorts5970 - I prefer 4. 😂🤣
We shall see at the end of time if that's the case. I know say what you do to boost the number of likes you get, but even so.
The healthiest medicine for the depressed.
He's a life enhancer... he's all the funnier because it always appears that he's hearing it for the first time too. Keep well, Big Yin.
I can guarantee its not the first time he's done this routine. Don't parrot what other people on here say. Unless you're only interested in. getting likes.
How does he come up with this stuff??! The first time I saw him, I laughed till I cried. My late husband did too (and we never agreed on ANYthing) When I think of comedians Billy Connolly is at the top of the list, and has been since the early 80s
he doesnt come up with them, he just repeats the stories he has experienced through life... its why he's so great, just great at telling stories ..
@@jumbo7165 If you'd seen him more than once you'd realise he doesn't tell the same stories over and over again. When he starts telling a story he assumes he's told it before and so removes and add things to it when he's onstage.
When I think of comedians it's Spike Milligan, Rik Mayall, then Billy Connolly. The first two are dead, so Billy is my favourite living comedian.
Billy is a genius. I have loved him for many years. Saw him at Hammersmith Apollo nearly 20 years ago. I wish I hadn't bothered with mascara! I started crying with laughter 5 minutes in.
Not the waterproof mascara.
"lurking in the undergrowth"🤣 I've not this for ages! Awww, undergrowth 🤣
The Best Comedian that’s ever lived.
Seen Billy when he came home on tour. I remember laughing the whole show with my Dad and after the show couldn’t remember some of the stories we where laughing at. Amazing
How long have you lived? It must be a long long time.
How lucky we are to have been around at the same time as Billy Connolly.
Without doubt the Best of the Best. EVER!!!
God bless him for making us all laugh until we cried, usually at ourselves.
I can't really find the superlatives which would begin to do the man justice.
The Last King of Scotland
I love that he brings back the Old black shirt . It's magical in the sense of bringing more of his youth into him . Like a old country song about your Wife said I thought I through that out. His favorite old Army shirt . Like a favorite shirt you only go fishing in. Because you caught a big one in it once. 😁
Jibber jabber.
"And then you mingle...." It gets me every time, man. What a genius
Billy is a legend!!! He has always cheered me up when I feel down. Have a great Christmas Billy & family
Billy I am reading your book which i got for christmas. Saw you many years ago and my ribs ached for days after. Thank you for the laughs and the memories
Born and raised in Edinburgh and love the Festival…..best explanation of buffets I’ve heard. Hillarious 😂😂😂😂
Oh my god my friggin sides hurt and my jaw is locked from laughing so hard tears are runnin down my cheeks!!! holy shit he’s funny. He’s a friggin riot!!!
Why do people feel the need to exaggerate.
His story telling is a work of art. Have just finished work for Chrimbo Hols and what a treat to start the holidays with, a bit of Billy Connolly. Merry xmas Billy and Pamela and family. Thank you for the sacrifices you made in the name of comedy.
Don't thank them, thank the Aztecs who invented the sport :D
@@thephoenixsystem6765 Aztecs invented pouring balsamic vinegar on their dicks? Man, no wonder they couldn't stand up to Cortez; they must've all been writhing on the floor in agony.
@@thephoenixsystem6765 Orr the Huancas.
He did this set on the Craig Ferguson show, like 15 years ago and I was in tears and pain from laughing so hard. The clip was around for a bit but eventually CBS decided to delete it 🙄
Craig was laughing his ass off, so proud of his idol, but he knew the network was gonna hate it and he seemed defeated that there was no way they'd get the joke.
I've been looking for it for soooo long, thanks for uploading!
He is pure natural gold! I think he has a rough idea how he will start the show, but then he wanders off as other memories come to him. He laughs hysterically at his own mishaps, and the mishaps of others, and although he describes in detail some of his experiences, for some reason he never comes across as being vulgar. Only he can get away with this! Two of my favourites are about the husband who buried his wife in the shed with her bottom sticking out. The explanation was, that the husband needed somewhere to park his bicycle. The other one was his account of the wildebeests being stalked by two lions. Hysterically funny! I wonder how he is doing now in 2024.
He has a pretty good idea how he will start the show, it's something he thinks about whilst he is in the dressing room waiting to go on.
Oh he quite often comes across as vulgar, but that doesn't bother him or me. If you REALLY want to know how he's doing this year, google it.
Merry Christmas Billy, you are a true legend mate
I knew someone who used to get naked if conversation flagged. But the gold medal goes to a friend of my sister. I was visiting her for the first time after she moved from the family home and she brought me to her local pub. She introduced me to her new friends "This is Michelle, she works behind the bar. Tony, he works at the post office.... "etc. I'm kinda like Prince Phillip at a tour of the fig rolls factory nodding and half heartedly saying pleasantries until she gets to one fella "... and this is Phil, he's got a cube shaped testicle..."
I'm going through the motions when it dawns on me what my sister has just said and I stop dead and just ask "Whaaaaat?". At this point Phil whips out his ballbag. And despite my best efforts and my inner voice screaming 'Don't fucking look' I fucking glanced down... and there it was, the cuboid nut. Not slightly cuboid, it really was distinctly cuboid.
So there I am, standing in a pub with a group of strangers, gazing in awe at this one guys who's proudly displaying his freakishly geometrically shaped bollock like a prizewinning vegetable in the village fete and all I could think of saying was 'Does that thing actually fucking work?'
Apparently the answer is 'yes' as he has 6 kids.
I don't know what I expected to hear about a salad bar but it certainly wasn't THAT! Absolutely hysterical. And it wouldn't surprise me at all if one of his pals doing that also was Steve Buscemi.😁
He's done variations on Salad Bar before, and no it wasn't Steve Buscemi.
The only reason Scots have anything even remotely like a salad bar 😂
I just love the UA-cam channel Billy has started, but my greatest wish is for the World Tours he did to come to digital format on iTunes. We simply need more of Billy everywhere.
The World Tours DVDs should be available on Amazon in the UK. When they appear on iTunes is another matter, if they appear at all. Oh and Billy didn't start the channel, I think it's a fan club that started it. He hates all social media.
Being a half Italian half Scottish American born in the south and raised in the suburban Midwest, I find this man to be one of the funniest men in history.
None of your heritage has a fucking thing to do with anything 😂
Merry Christmas Billy.
Thank you very much Billy you nearly killed me.
Never watch Billy while eating 😂
Billy... you are amazing. I love your outlook on life. You are just the best
God bless Billy!
Billy is absolutely insane . I love it !
I love it so good bro
Crying with laughter. Genius.
Absolute genius , thank goodness I've been lucky to have seen him live on 4 occasions 😂😂😂😂 taking over a week for my body to stop aching from so much laughter 😂🥰😂🥰😂🥰😂🥰
Strange because I've seen him many times in the past and I've never had a problem with my body aching.
I love the way he went "So" as if he hadn't just referenced Silence Of The Lambs and putting balsamic vinegar on your important bits, only Billy, only Billy Fuckin' Connolly
What??
2:40 “Make yersel’ a mangina” 😂😂😂😂
How can you not love this?!,might try it at the next work do
People on this board are insane.
One time we (hubby, daughter and herpartner at the time ) saw him at the Sydney Opera House, my daughter laughed so much she almost brained herself on the balcony rail laughing that much.
Awesome a true legend
To unbeige is now my favourite verb.
Of course it is.
@@irbennett You say that like I’m unaware of my own preference. 🧐
@@seanjosephhayes It's just that I know when somebody is lying.
@@irbennett Evidently not but crack on Ian.
@@seanjosephhayes Oh I do know Jose.
Love him he made quartine easier
What's quartine?
Thank you Billie. I love your books ❤ I relate from a different life
Ah man. What a joy.
Tooooo funny. Thanks Billy for being exactly who you were and still are.
Love You Big Yin and Take Care and Keep Safe, XXXX
Now where have I seen that before.
He was already a legend in Scotland by 1974 until the Parkinson appearance in 1975
Great toilet talk!!!
It’s also the accent that makes it funny!
Merry Christmas 🌟🎄🌟
Great take on life.
Just watched Shrink Wrap with Billy being interviewed by his wife Pam, TOTALLY RECOMMEND IT!🇬🇧
What channel please (in the uk)
@@Mortthemoose UA-cam x
The funniest man on earth .. EVER....
Classic billy love him
Watched Billy's Great American trail last night and dreamt of Billy all night. The dreams were so vivid (he ran a B&B, lol) that I felt I knew him. I cannae tell you how disappointed I was when I woke up and realized it was all dreams. I loved being in Billy's world. 🏴
Write it all down while it's still fresh in your mind, you can live the dream all over again.
I've forgotten some of the details, but I remember the joy. Thankfully there's YT for some of it, and I'll wear out my copies of Mrs. Brown and Unfortunate Events. ❤️
That's insane.
Never had the privelege....Social insight... Amazing
He's been my favourite comedian for years, such a shame that age and illness has caught up with him.
Vegetables in Scotland, this man lives on another planet LOL
😂 The salad vegetables were imported especially for the beige folk at the Edinburgh Festival
Genius level 10, a storyteller that is just the exception to anyone else on planet earth, unique / windswept and interesting
That's gibberish.
@@irbennett you’re gibberish, bennett? Sounds like an English name, there we have our explanation 👌🏻
@@Elonmuskateer What you posted was gibberish. That's how to do it properly. The name is Welsh. The fact that you named yourself after that wanker speaks volumes.
The great thing about this is, that now we can all go ask A-listers: "have you ever seen any of Billy Connolly's bits?" The ones who start blushing, you'll know they've been to an Edinburgh festival buffet.
So you're going to ask all A-list actors.Yeah right. As if they'd talk to you.
Respect xx
Billy, I'm not one to interject into people's lives but do you remember being at Newcastle Central Station with Maggie and a couple of snotty nosed kids. You asked if this train went to Berwick and the guy said yes. But he failed to mention it didn't actually stop there. We ended up in Edinburgh. Funny childhood memories.
And yet you had to interject.
❤Billy❤
Jaymack
I first saw Billy live in a Portmahomack saloon bar in the North East of Scotland, this was about 1972 before he was well known; he was about 3ft from our table and had made at least one LP record. I don't remember much about his act though. I often wonder if he remembers playing there; no booking needed. Now I think he relied too much on swearing as part of his act.
Legend 💜
Funny guy! ❤
"shhhh boys.... Daddy's working"
Id totally get found out with two cherry tomatoes on my plate ,That's not you Geno 🤦♂️ffs i could watch Billy 24 /7
Billy your so funny 😄
Legend 😂😂😂😂😂
I got Sir John Guilegood in the neck with a plastic fork 😂😂😂😂😂 I'm dying!!
With a new potato. Oh and it's Gielgud.
Lovely funny man😅😄😂🤣👏👏👏
The way he advises against balsamic vinegar makes me believe he may actually have tried this.
I wonder if he actually meant Tobasco. Can't imagine vinegar having any adverse effect
Billy was actually banned from the Traverse Theatre in Eddinburgh for getting his willy out at a salad buffet. Most of this routine actually happened.
@@stevefowler3398 Can't imagine vinegar having any effect??? Vinegar is acidic, balsamic vinegar more than most.
Hahaha 😂😂😂 good ol Billy 🤣😂
He looks tired here guys 😔 amazing Bill...the legend
He is in his 70s. He didn't have the energy he used to, as a result his shows were shorter, but still longer than most.
Funny man!
Love the idea that some people think he's just joking.
Fucking mad, loved it.
Comic genius...
He’s not a comedian, he’s just a story teller as most Scots are… but some do it better than others…
totally agree..... life stories
@@jumbo7165 My favourite stories are the drunken family singing!
And you are nothing. Absolutely nothing
Ya Tats wots it all about😂
Hes a storyteller and a comedian. In fact Billy just calls himself a comedian. Or did.
Ah yes, the salad bit. Idk which came first, the one here or when he was with his padawan Craig Ferguson.
Vinaigrette in your trousers. Good ol days ay...
More strength to the big Yin....LMAO .
It must be so difficult being Billy Connolly purely because people just EXPECT him to be incredibly funny all the time, and the only chance he'll get to just relax and be himself is when he's with his own close friends and family.
One of the reasons he chose retirement.
This the 21st Century version of 'The address to a Haggis'
4:45..🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂
♥️🍁🤗🇨🇦🐘
You think balsamic is bad, 😂😂😂😂
My mate worked the restaurant biz many years, one day a colleague was on a busy night they had & his main task that night was chopping peppers 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🔪
But for some unknown reason he forgot to don gloves! Then he took a long awaited break to pee!!!
Screams, could be heard for miles 😂😂😂😂😱😱😱😱😱😱
This wouldn't be my first time uttering the words "my willy" and "Sophia Loren" in the same sentence.
What's the word he used a the start? Beige? Bourgeoisie?
BEIGE
@@stevefowler3398 thanks
I love it when he makes fun of his wife.
I wonder what he'd say about 'PENacoladas' (think about that one folks 🤣). 🍒
Stirring a drink with your willy? Wasn't that Graham Chapman of Python fame?
Graham Chapman was an alcoholic, so I can't imagine what he used to do with his willy.
Graham Chapman was an alcoholic. He wouldn't waste a drink by putting his willy in it.
I’m peeing myself right now 😂😂😂🤣🤣
I'm doing portable art. I got Bubbles. Woohoo. 😊
He's worth watching just to see what hes wearing. Lol. I love the Beetlejuice pants. And if course having your willy in a Gin and Tonic is taking it too far Billy.... Because it wasn't a "Fruit and Salad Bar" or an "Open Bar". 😁
I wonder why he was banned. Hmmm.
This is fantastic
not bragging or anything but struggled to get mine in a guinness
Cold day?
Bring yer corduroy trousers 😅😅
I´m here again? This is not the sushi bar!
LMFAO
2020?
@@Tiochfaidh an untouchable man! A sainted maaan!
What happens if you get a stiffy ?
Then it's a hot dog.
he looks benny hill and ozzy osborn mix with i irish accent
Jibber jabber.
Scottish accent
Lol 😆
Still laughing
Then you're bat shit crazy.
And why not!
Homer Simpson once sang a song called "you don't win friends with salad" but I imagine it would be a very different song if it was cock salad he was singing about.