So much expert discussion and research and theories focus so much on trying to teach people with BPD how to control their behavior so they don't cause too much trouble, to themselves or others. Those are important life skills, for sure. But what I rarely hear in lectures or videos about the disorder is any sort of treatment for the horrible pain that causes the "maladaptive" behaviors. When I did DBT, currently considered the most effective "treatment" for BPD, we were told straight up at the first class that it wasn't about learning how to feel better, it was about learning how to tolerate your painful emotions so you won't misbehave, so to speak. If "treatment" means "learning how to tolerate excruciating pain so that others will stick around," then I think research on this disorder has a long way to go. Yes, I want to be able to tolerate my pain better. But even more, I want to feel better so I don't have to tolerate the pain. I want a treatment that helps resolve my pain--not teach me how to handle it better.
Life is both pain and joy. Nothing resolves it, but I had good luck with EMDR and tapping therapies help move unprocessed memories some preverbal even. Breath work will retrain your nervous system. Everyone could use those therapies and have a less painful life.
@@DrDanielFox I just purchased your book the border line personality workbook. Even though I'm sure it's going to be helpful. I'm worried about starting it. These feelings are so frustrating. Why can't I just take on a challenge, I'm always so afraid.
While I hear you...that is the opposite of accepting reality. Life has pain, and a lot of it is self created...through our own core wounds, cognitive distortions and false narratives. Constantly fighting against what "should" be and not accepting reality creates far more pain. It's like demanding to control the weather vs adapting, planning, and accepting that the weather is as it is. To expect less pain is resisting what is. Being able to sit with pain vs wanting it to be completely gone, are very very different mindsets. Life does not exist without pain. Our very entrance into the world is traumatic...and we were never given a handbook to life that said "expect no pain". It it is this faulty expectation that causes so many of us to try to numb it, make it go away, avoid it. If we truly understand that life and pain are intertwined, we accept it more readily. If we know we can sit with it and good times can come again, we can thrive more easily. Life is like the ocean, many waves, rip tides, power, beauty, and at times threat...but there is also a constancy. It behooves us all to not fight reality, but to have self efficacy, empowerment, resilience, to sit through and know we can handle the pain...that it does not need to control us. I worked in medicine and it would've been such a lie, and a bad goal...to tell any of my open heart patience that they would have no pain, that I could take it away entirely. Nope. I could try to lessen it, and do what I could, but a more realistic goal was to expect it...and that although it could be brought down, no pain was unrealistic. Think of the lepers back when, who had no pain and lost fingers and limbs...because of their loss of physical pain. They no longer had the signals to tell them to pull back from a hot stove, or a sliver was in their skin, and many other things. Emotional pain is there to let us know that we have needs that aren't being met, or boundaries being crossed. It's what we do with that information that helps or hurts us (and others). When we can get our frontal cortex online, with the emotional pain, we can lessen the pain...because we have a more accurate equation. We don't fall into the trap of being velcroed to the pain points as much. When we pause, get curious, about our pain...more than frantically trying to fight it off, numb it...just that alone can alleviate some of the pain. It's counterintuitive, but so powerful. I promise, that holding space for you pain...is the opposite of self abandonment. We self abandon and self betray more than anyone does to us...yet we rarely see it. Wanting the pain to just go away is akin to saying you'd show up for a friend, or a small child, as long as they have no pain, no issues. The most compassionate thing we can do, is to show up for ourselves amidst the pain. That is self care. That is validation. That is having our own back. Through that process, the pain actually starts to lessen. One has to go through, not around.
@@Alphacentauri819 this is the second comment where I’ve felt like someone nailed it, and then noticed it was you. You seem like a lovely and wise person, thanks for participating 😊
@Kristian Mary Numabela It is and I’m trying so hard to find the beauty in this all! To find the path that’s perfect for me. Especially when it comes to a career.
@@DrDanielFoxDEEP GRATITUDE FOR YOU DOING UA-cam VIDEOS....... TO EDUCATE THOSE WHO MAY ID NEVER HAD A PSYCHOLOGY CLASS , OR A CHANCE TO SEE,HEAR, READ ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESSES.....
As A ALCOHOLIC IN RECOVERY FOR OVER #32 YEARS ...I STILL HAVE POOR IMPULSE CONTROL,/ IT'S ADDICTIVE BEHAVIOR I CALL ....IT IT APPLIES WITH DATING BEAUTIFUL LIPSTICK 💄 LESBIAN WOMEN AS WELL ...
My psychiatrist is the leading Doctor of BPD program and hospital services in Quebec. He and his program have helped me TREMENDOUSLY back when BPD was still very stigmatized. There is hope and I admire people like you sir. ❤. Keep up the good work and service you give to the community. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I’ve walked with a friend for over 3 years. During that time they were diagnosed CPTSD/BPD. I continue to be consistent with them and watch the patterns circle. Im in the position of knowing a incident that I believe is the root of their disorder, which is something they will never admit to a professional. This has led to behaviours over the years after, that I see are linked to this incident in the following behaviours that have led to them losing ‘normal’ self and living in a mix of isolation and power gaining interaction with others. Then remorse, self hate, inability to rationalise others. The smallest remark is seen as a personal attack and then withdrawal, depression, self distruct, not eating for days, leaving out meds for heart problem, wanting to die. I have his trust but also am in a constant push pull. He’s amazed I haven’t deserted him as all do. He wants therapy but then doesn’t engage and leaves or sleeps through video sessions. Is my constant love and acceptance helping or causing more damage? Does unconditional love break through a little by presenting to them a different approach that challenges their ‘norm’? I know he shows the real him with me rather than a pretence as he shows his long term friend whose known him since childhood and oblivious to his real personality?
I can't tell you how your friend feels about you, but as a person with BPD who hugely struggles with self hate and overall hiding of my true self from others, I would surely appreciate someone like you in my life, even the fact you're trying to get educated about their struggles is beautiful. I'm sure they appreciate your presence in their life, please don't forget to take care of yourself as well though
I think that what you're doing DOES help, even if it's just a little. When your emotions feel like chaos, it's nice to have a constant in your life that you can trust won't go away for any reason.
I have a friend who has stuck beside me while I walk through something similar. If it wasn’t for his consistency I’d have lost hope a long time ago. He encourages me to keep working on myself and I have grown so much and am back in therapy now and it still amazes me he hasn’t abandoned me yet. Gives me hope ❤
This one's hard to swallow, maybe just things i needed to hear. I love these long form explanations though. They're like real sessions, except you can go back to them! Long time watcher, thank you as always Dr. Fox 🙏
Thank you Dr Fox for all the examples and definitions you use. You make learning about all of this stuff a little easier to comprehend & I’m never left feeling guilty about having BPD watching your videos. I’m trying my best to change and rewire patterns for my toddler, myself and my family. I watch your videos after crisis calls too, you’re a big part of my healing journey at the moment and i’m so grateful for the knowledge and empathy you have.
I live in a small town. I can only have one session a week. I am on Medicare. I can't find the total care I need. Everyone wants money. I also have P.T.S.D.and high anxiety. I can't do it on line either. I do have a psychiatrist I see once a month. Thanks to you I get more information.
We can talk around it but the problem is we all have a love problem. Some don't get any, some only get it as long as they fulfill the conditions, some steal it. It really is a case of malnutrition of the spirit.
This! I have never felt loved unconditionally by anyone! Nobody has ever held me and soothed me when I was hurting and feeling really really bad emotions. It's always been very clear that I'm not enough and too much at the same time
This video was so helpful, thank you for taking the time to go into such detail. Your channel has been a great source of comfort and insight for me with the shorter videos, but I’d also love to see more of these longer, more in-depth videos. Love the work you do. ❤
Thank you so much for your kind words! I'm glad that you found the video helpful and that my channel has been a source of comfort and insight for you. I'll definitely take your feedback into consideration and try to create more longer, in-depth videos in the future. Keep watching and supporting!
Omg this just in time. I had to miss a neurological appointment today. I suffer from functional neurological disorder .i BPD traits along with ..ptsd. And a few others. Ugh. You are helping me so much to understand my disorder. God bless 🙌 I want to heal so badly
I never was diagnosed with any mental disorder but wondered what was wrong with me, sometime was missing, that much i always felt. my family has many cases of autism, Asperger’s adhd, dyslexia, early dementia and addictions. Cptsd resonates best with me but i kept on studying about many possibilities to explain the way i felt. I have a tendency to attract narcissists to my inner circle and now seeing it… i am able to get out of their games… and i have the pleasure to listen to my intuition and i feel whole for the first time in 46 years walking in this earth. Few years back I could not conceive that living could be this pleasurable. Maybe menopause has a much bigger silver lining than what I have been told. 🙏
This was really interesting! It’s nice to see you present to people who are more like your colleagues-you give a different perspective on the subject. And hearing the questions people asked, and your response was informative too.
Thank you. I've had bpd diagnosis.this is so very useful. I recognise myself in the 'Starbucks queue analogy. And how finally I've started applying pause/mindfulness. My better attitude attracts better responses these days. Improvement gives me hope. I'm older. And better!
I had specialists diagnose me everything at some point.. adhd in 4th grade, depression, anxiety, bpd, ocd, asd, bipolar, I just want to be “normal”. I’ve always been extremely quiet and shy and lack of facial expressions. I got to the point I feel burnt out from getting help and I’m currently not in therapy.
Same here. In therapy starting at 12 or so until my early 20’s. I’ve tried so many things when I was younger, thinking I just needed to find correct someone. That never happened. Years of therapy and thousands of dollars but absolutely nothing to show for it. At this point in feels entirely pointless to develop relationships.
Whatever help you may choose to pursue in the future, it's important it be based on YOUR agenda. Being quiet and introverted and minimally expressive is not in of itself something wrong that needs to be corrected. Sometimes people with anxiety, depression, autism spectrum etc will present that way... but it does not ipso facto mean that if you are introverted and unexpressive that you naturally have those diagnoses. There's more to it. The real question is whether or not there is something bothering YOU that YOU want to address or work on. All treatment should be driven by your agenda. The exceptions to that are when people are engaging in severely disruptive or destructive behaviors. If you are respecting other people's rights and safety, and keeping yourself safe, and functioning, then the only question is whether or not YOU feel troubled by something and want to do anything about it.
Hey Dr. Fox, I really enjoyed this video and I appreciate all of the content you put out. Your content is always very educational. It has helped me manage some of my maladaptive behaviors and has taught me how to replace them with adaptive strategies. So, thank you for that. I was wondering if you would make a video about what it would look like/be like for a patient to have BPD or complex BPD and also be on the autism spectrum and how managing both conditions would be different than perhaps pure BPD. Again, thank you for all of your help and amazing content!
Omg a long ass video of your beautiful helpful voice. Thank you so much, I've missed these long take notes and think hard videos. Thank you. And my BPD is getting better all the time. Thank you. ❤❤❤❤❤
Thank you so much for comparing the differences, really appreciate it. I have a few more questions. Most of these disorders have attachment disturbances, As I am diagnosed with Borderline, I recognize I have a disorganized attachment, push pull. As an educator, I have a desire to learn more about the brain everyday. Currently I am reading Attachment disturbances in adults, treatment in Repair. Brown and Elliot discuss metacognition impairment, 4 types of metacognition bpd and d.i.d have the same typre of metacognition impairment and NPD has a different type. I have understand that there are four types of metacognition, but its not clear what the thought process are and what the deficits are. So can they be learned and how? Also is a person has a learning disability how would that effect treatment? is that something that is discussed in therapy?
Thank you for sharing more than just narcs avoid therapy. Actually, if you feel like googling, theres a study that narcissists spend the most money on therapy! They need to be normal the most to act out their movies. Me, a BPD, I would move in my therapist if I could.
Have you seen that series where the serial killer kidnaps his therapist and puts him in his basement because he wants to get better? The guy from 40 Year Old Virgin played the therapist. He ended up killing him lol. But seriously I know what you mean. If I could afford therapy, I’d see the therapist everyday. In the uk it’s almost impossible to get therapy for this sort of problem unless you are very extreme and they end up sectioning you.
Hi Daniel. Thank you for all your work! Can you recommend an online DBT program to help with emotional disregulation? Although I understand why I become disregulated due to childhood trauma triggers, I continue to struggle to stay regulated with my boyfriend during conflict. I have been trying everything I can think of and watched hundreds of videos and read dozens of books, but haven’t made improvements in the area of disregulation. Thank you for any suggestions you can offer!
I have to say that for a long time I also supplemented my pocket money by serving in a bakery in the busiest part of town at a subway stop. Many were under time pressure and often it was not only not enough to friendly courtesy phrases but I was also almost constantly grumbled at. Never in my life would I have thought of attaching this to my person and getting more upset than usual.
Dr. Fox, have you had any dealings with personality disorders- Specifically Borderline and/or Narcissistic in the realm of Parental Alienation? If so, how would you recommend navigating with a parent that has completely pushed their pathogenic parenting onto the child. The child also has began to present lots of the same personality traits?
Dr. Fox is AMAZING. Move to Sacramento, Dr. Fox! Or I guess I could move to Texas! Haha. I am having a REALLY hard time finding a therapist for BPD and/or Narcissism. Not really sure what I have.
What are your thoughts on someone in active addiction with years of undiagnosed moderate BPD, becoming the Dark Triad during those years of addiction? Causing more C-PTSD on top of childhood C-PSTD? Once diagnosed, where do you start? , Which diagnosis would you treat first?
I have a question..I've been looking for a good counceller for years..how do I know I've found a good one that can support me but also help me think in new ways... Is that honestly the best way to heal..? How do we heal?
You're so welcome and thank you for your kind support of the channel. It means a lot when people help support the cause of putting out honest and research based information. Thank you and be well.
I have Bipolar and PTSD, which sometimes people confuse with BPD. And the people who think I have BPD treat me with suspicion like a potential threat until I correct them. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to actually have it, and have a bunch of ill-informed people believing you're some sort of sociopath.
I've been like this because my birth grew up in a home where she was touched my maternal grandfather touched my birth mother and all through these years it's been going on and on and on consistently through all the men and my family alcoholism mental health all combined because we all came from two different families and it was one big whirlwind when my step grandmother and my maternal grandfather met way before I was born this has been going on for a long time do I have a hard time I do but I know my UPS and my downs and I know my triggers I have a lot of them is it easy on me no it's not but this is 39 years of my life and I'm like wow been diagnosed through the years and years and years nothing nothing same thing same thing you're saving my life because you're breaking it down piece by piece therapist psychiatrist is the same thing over and over oh here take some medication feel better I've been on medication since I was a child they would put medicine in my food just to knock me out where I can get touched or whatever I was a victim I admit it me my birth mother my aunt who is my step grandmother's daughter The outsiders basically we all got shoved aside because of their past and their mistakes and they do it for the kids they don't stop and it goes down the line over and over and over because families have secrets and they everything was hush hush back in the day when I grow up in my home I didn't know any of this until couple months ago when all these secrets came out and all this I'm like wow and I had a mental breakdown I went to a facility in Miami and they threw me out in the freaking streets so I was homeless for a month I went to jail for 38 days for domestic violence and I never put a hand on my fiance or nothing or my kid I lost my cool I had enough because of all this torments I broke out full blown hives all over my body all that stuff because of all these secrets and all these past knowing I had the disease and it took a lot on me do when you take so much all these family secrets how do you respond to something like that when it's been going on before me this has been going on for a very long time in my family secrets and secrets alcoholism mental health and myself will never understand that
It feels like I’m wearing mask and lying when responding to others like I care about them or otherwise find them smart, interesting, funny etc. Every now and then I’m impressed with someone but that is short lived.
I'm a true bpd "person" (have all of the traits) so I struggle immensely with relationships and emotions , catastrophising scenarios is a frequent thing, almost daily , tablets help slightly but I need additional help but people get offended by me because i take what they are saying as very demeaning and negative and it upsets me deeply or I get offended by them and then upset them due to my reaction
This was great! but you didn't really cover AsPD at all? I would say the way I experience empathy is pretty high in terms of cognition (I understand why people feel the way they do etc), as well as in terms of somatic manifestation (even if I myself might not really understand or even be aware of an emotion, my body usually goes ahead and mirrors whatever people around me are feeling), I do very much lack that affective aspect of it (in other words, despite understanding the feelings of those around me, and even sometimes recreating them in myself, I still lack the compassion that would otherwise motivate me to actually do something about it to help them; like "okay? Not my problem"). There are many people who are attracted to me (even though I'm not interested in them), and I'm sure that my high EQ does contribute to my charisma as you mentioned. As an unrelated side note, I've been a long-time consumer of your content, so despite the fact that lately I've been feeding more into the maladaptive aspects of my traits such as manipulating and hurting others, I've also been quite conscious of the fact that my actions in turn hurt myself, so I'm back again for some mindfulness on my part lol. It's time to take responsibility again and try to get used to boredom again :p I think my major issue is finding that balance between having fun and being bored; I used to forbid myself from having any fun whatsoever because I'm well aware of my toxicity :p But I'm trying to find healthier ways that are still fun… I've found that if I don't have a healthy outlet for fun, I'll end up taking it out on those around me eventually. It's quite the predicament And I'm quickly losing interest and finding it difficult to stay invested in my education as well, despite the fact that I _love_ learning, and I know I'll be an exceptional nurse (once I get everything sorted out of course)
Some thing I heard a Psychology Prof/ say other day.., that if ongoing untreated Depression ADHD and PTSD are not diagnosed and treated by age of 40… This can leave long term brain( mental ) damage and MAY be a contributing factor to Dementia from age 60.. I have a family member whose in this situation and who has had Sleep Apnea and extreme anxiety and Work stress for many yrs/ AND I believe this is affecting them. As well as Having a Narcissistic Disorder..! Possibly Covert.. But undiagnosed! Their memory loss is concerning.. Their Anger/ verbal Abuse / Aggressive outbursts and Outrageous Behaviour is concerning.. to one family member only! They have been refusing ANY type of treatment or therapy for 30 Odd years! They have been bringing Flying Monkeys into their life for many years as they have a very Low self esteem, these People boost their ego and they feed off these people! They also hide the real them.. So most people don’t witness their aggression! How can we get this person to receive Help.? Please? 🙏🏻🎉 So he’s not a liability to a family member as they age?
I hadn't heard that, but it makes sense. I know I have cognitive damage in my mid 40s. I'm sorry about the family member's issues. Sounds very hard to deal with. Unfortunately, many people don't want to change or even question if they should. I hope the whole family gets better 🤍
I am 69 years old. Talk about ... And I seem to hit my head a lot. Every time makes me worse. And all the doctors want to do is shut me up with pills that do not work, only makes things worse.
Obsessive compulsive personality disorder not OCD and the dependent personality disorder how can it be that we are all these that is why people think I am crazy
I don't think a 'conspiracy theorist' is necessarily a narcissist; however, what I found was that the narcissist will personalize and project the conspiracy into the external world and other people. They also will not tolerate anyone who thinks differently
Can you talk about how one can develop BPD when one doesn't properly bond with the parents bc of emotional, mental and physical abandonment that is real??? It's not all in one's head. 😢
Autistic people can be abnormally intelligent, so having an intellectual impairment is not appropriate. Hallmarks of autism that can differentiate from schizoid is communication issues.. literal thinking, black and white thinking, sensory issues etc
I was just looking through the comments to see if anyone had picked up on this 🤔 intellectual impairment does not need to be present for an ASD diagnosis. I have a client that was deterred from assessment and told they were "too smart" to have ASD by a previous clinician and this was very unhelpful
@@samp2782 I myself am autistic. I am incredibly academic. I have 3 children and two of them have autism. One of them is high needs and has an intellectual impairment.
My narc husband got mad and told me dont try to control me when i just asked him to take out the trash. When asked to clean the kitchen, he left counters and stove covered in soapy gunk. I know hes a narc but he wouldnt go to therapy narcissist narcissist
I have to disagree with you on the insight thing. I have a BPD sufferer in my family and he has insight into everything he does and hoe it affects others. Not everyone is the same.
Trust me it isnt so interesting when you live on the downside of a relationship with an abusive passively covert disordered narcissist. It's disgusting frustrating and suffers the psyche.
People whom has never experiensed that side of life themsself can and will never ever heal ore help a person whom has experiensed it. It has to be a self experienser who can do that. Look closely thats the truth amd thats what wrong woth sociatys ways of healing. Sp ther you have both cause amd answers
This is too hard. And when your loved ones are Not kind compassionate or loving and Respectful It only makes it Harder. Why continue to try anymore? 😢 why bother?
This is inaccurate. People with ASD don’t all have developmental delays or intellectual impairments. ASD level 1 (formerly Asperger’s) is a great example.
And i know for sure because im that one i have beem trough this my self, i have not read it in a book and taking an education in something i have experienst it my self?? Yoy can never define the core truth to this. Its hsp highli sensitive people whom get trauma from the world they was thougt was safe but thats a bog lie parents and teachers tell that is so horrible then finding out that its not like that, and we actualy knew our self that its a lie soo that split our personality. go on read books i know whats the truth
Actualy those people whom are suffeeing with mental illness are those people whom is emossional high intelligent those traits wasnt taken serious in early age so trauma hit them harder then others soo its the other way around sorry to say but yoy are wrong
O have always thought zo be able to read ppl well, but i act in a way that is not intelligentnat all when dealing with ppl, like seeing thing but wanting to believe my made up images of them, do and say stupid things, and not separate from ppl early enough Which makes it worse because it is chosen stupidity 🤣🤣🤣
I'm not exactly comfortable with how you refer to autism as a disorder or that you would look for an intellectual impairment to assess it. If you mean something specific that would be great to expand on but leaving it at that doesn't allow for people to understand that autistic folk are often very intelligent.
I don't think you should feel bad for running over a kid's bike if he left it in your driveway. He shouldn't have been in my driveway or left his bike there. However, if I ran it over in HIS driveway, I would feel very bad and immediately buy him a new bike. I think most people. WITHOUT a personality disorder would agree with me.
Yeah, it was an off the top of the head scenario. I also would be mad kid left HIS damn bike and damaged MY car. Not the best analogy. Anger is a human reaction. And though I MIGHT replace the brats bike, that would be charity in my drive. A duty if elsewhere.
I would feel bad regardless. It's just a kid. You don't have empathy. You have low self esteem instead. You only feel bad because you made a mistake not because the child is going to suffer. And you are so full of yourself too. "Most people without a personality disorder would agree with me" huh? Hopefully someone's bike really scratches your damn car.
W T F how can dependant be Treatment Accepting and at the same time Treatment Rejecting! How the hell can I take you seriously when straight out the gate there is a massive contradiction in your logic ?
So much expert discussion and research and theories focus so much on trying to teach people with BPD how to control their behavior so they don't cause too much trouble, to themselves or others. Those are important life skills, for sure. But what I rarely hear in lectures or videos about the disorder is any sort of treatment for the horrible pain that causes the "maladaptive" behaviors. When I did DBT, currently considered the most effective "treatment" for BPD, we were told straight up at the first class that it wasn't about learning how to feel better, it was about learning how to tolerate your painful emotions so you won't misbehave, so to speak. If "treatment" means "learning how to tolerate excruciating pain so that others will stick around," then I think research on this disorder has a long way to go. Yes, I want to be able to tolerate my pain better. But even more, I want to feel better so I don't have to tolerate the pain. I want a treatment that helps resolve my pain--not teach me how to handle it better.
I want to encourage you to learn about your core content. This is an excellent way to help yourself control and grow. My workbook may help. Be well
Life is both pain and joy. Nothing resolves it, but I had good luck with EMDR and tapping therapies help move unprocessed memories some preverbal even. Breath work will retrain your nervous system. Everyone could use those therapies and have a less painful life.
@@DrDanielFox I just purchased your book the border line personality workbook.
Even though I'm sure it's going to be helpful. I'm worried about starting it. These feelings are so frustrating. Why can't I just take on a challenge, I'm always so afraid.
While I hear you...that is the opposite of accepting reality.
Life has pain, and a lot of it is self created...through our own core wounds, cognitive distortions and false narratives.
Constantly fighting against what "should" be and not accepting reality creates far more pain.
It's like demanding to control the weather vs adapting, planning, and accepting that the weather is as it is.
To expect less pain is resisting what is.
Being able to sit with pain vs wanting it to be completely gone, are very very different mindsets.
Life does not exist without pain. Our very entrance into the world is traumatic...and we were never given a handbook to life that said "expect no pain". It it is this faulty expectation that causes so many of us to try to numb it, make it go away, avoid it. If we truly understand that life and pain are intertwined, we accept it more readily. If we know we can sit with it and good times can come again, we can thrive more easily. Life is like the ocean, many waves, rip tides, power, beauty, and at times threat...but there is also a constancy.
It behooves us all to not fight reality, but to have self efficacy, empowerment, resilience, to sit through and know we can handle the pain...that it does not need to control us.
I worked in medicine and it would've been such a lie, and a bad goal...to tell any of my open heart patience that they would have no pain, that I could take it away entirely. Nope. I could try to lessen it, and do what I could, but a more realistic goal was to expect it...and that although it could be brought down, no pain was unrealistic.
Think of the lepers back when, who had no pain and lost fingers and limbs...because of their loss of physical pain. They no longer had the signals to tell them to pull back from a hot stove, or a sliver was in their skin, and many other things.
Emotional pain is there to let us know that we have needs that aren't being met, or boundaries being crossed. It's what we do with that information that helps or hurts us (and others).
When we can get our frontal cortex online, with the emotional pain, we can lessen the pain...because we have a more accurate equation. We don't fall into the trap of being velcroed to the pain points as much.
When we pause, get curious, about our pain...more than frantically trying to fight it off, numb it...just that alone can alleviate some of the pain. It's counterintuitive, but so powerful.
I promise, that holding space for you pain...is the opposite of self abandonment. We self abandon and self betray more than anyone does to us...yet we rarely see it.
Wanting the pain to just go away is akin to saying you'd show up for a friend, or a small child, as long as they have no pain, no issues. The most compassionate thing we can do, is to show up for ourselves amidst the pain. That is self care. That is validation. That is having our own back. Through that process, the pain actually starts to lessen. One has to go through, not around.
@@Alphacentauri819 this is the second comment where I’ve felt like someone nailed it, and then noticed it was you. You seem like a lovely and wise person, thanks for participating 😊
Still learning to live with BPD, especially the impulsiveness & survive in a world that still stigmatizes mental illness 🙄
Truly.
Challenging and exhausting.
@Kristian Mary Numabela It is and I’m trying so hard to find the beauty in this all! To find the path that’s perfect for me. Especially when it comes to a career.
@@suekelsey1329 We’re all going to make it!!🫂💚
@@MamaCancer23 Thank you. I do need to hear that. 🙂
@@suekelsey1329 You’re very welcome!!
My gratitude is unending for you and this whole community you’ve created Doc!
You’re very welcome.
Yes
@@DrDanielFoxDEEP GRATITUDE FOR YOU DOING UA-cam VIDEOS.......
TO EDUCATE THOSE WHO MAY ID NEVER HAD A PSYCHOLOGY CLASS , OR A CHANCE TO SEE,HEAR, READ ABOUT MENTAL ILLNESSES.....
@@DrDanielFoxwas this a slide presentation you put together?
GREAT 👌💯🙏 job.
PowerPoint?
As A ALCOHOLIC IN RECOVERY FOR OVER #32 YEARS ...I STILL HAVE POOR IMPULSE CONTROL,/ IT'S ADDICTIVE BEHAVIOR I CALL ....IT
IT APPLIES WITH DATING BEAUTIFUL LIPSTICK 💄 LESBIAN WOMEN AS WELL ...
You are not alone. I started my journey today.
You are like The BPD Whisperer, Dr Fox. Thank you again
Thanks for the compliment
Dr. Fox you are really an Angel for BPD community
My psychiatrist is the leading Doctor of BPD program and hospital services in Quebec. He and his program have helped me TREMENDOUSLY back when BPD was still very stigmatized. There is hope and I admire people like you sir. ❤. Keep up the good work and service you give to the community. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I’ve walked with a friend for over 3 years. During that time they were diagnosed CPTSD/BPD. I continue to be consistent with them and watch the patterns circle. Im in the position of knowing a incident that I believe is the root of their disorder, which is something they will never admit to a professional. This has led to behaviours over the years after, that I see are linked to this incident in the following behaviours that have led to them losing ‘normal’ self and living in a mix of isolation and power gaining interaction with others. Then remorse, self hate, inability to rationalise others. The smallest remark is seen as a personal attack and then withdrawal, depression, self distruct, not eating for days, leaving out meds for heart problem, wanting to die. I have his trust but also am in a constant push pull. He’s amazed I haven’t deserted him as all do. He wants therapy but then doesn’t engage and leaves or sleeps through video sessions. Is my constant love and acceptance helping or causing more damage? Does unconditional love break through a little by presenting to them a different approach that challenges their ‘norm’? I know he shows the real him with me rather than a pretence as he shows his long term friend whose known him since childhood and oblivious to his real personality?
I can't tell you how your friend feels about you, but as a person with BPD who hugely struggles with self hate and overall hiding of my true self from others, I would surely appreciate someone like you in my life, even the fact you're trying to get educated about their struggles is beautiful. I'm sure they appreciate your presence in their life, please don't forget to take care of yourself as well though
Your understanding and not leaving and not judging are why he is ok
I think that what you're doing DOES help, even if it's just a little. When your emotions feel like chaos, it's nice to have a constant in your life that you can trust won't go away for any reason.
It does help even can heal him somehow ❤
I have a friend who has stuck beside me while I walk through something similar. If it wasn’t for his consistency I’d have lost hope a long time ago. He encourages me to keep working on myself and I have grown so much and am back in therapy now and it still amazes me he hasn’t abandoned me yet. Gives me hope ❤
This one's hard to swallow, maybe just things i needed to hear. I love these long form explanations though. They're like real sessions, except you can go back to them! Long time watcher, thank you as always Dr. Fox 🙏
Thank you Dr Fox for all the examples and definitions you use. You make learning about all of this stuff a little easier to comprehend & I’m never left feeling guilty about having BPD watching your videos. I’m trying my best to change and rewire patterns for my toddler, myself and my family.
I watch your videos after crisis calls too, you’re a big part of my healing journey at the moment and i’m so grateful for the knowledge and empathy you have.
I’m so glad you found the video helpful.
I live in a small town. I can only have one session a week. I am on Medicare. I can't find the total care I need. Everyone wants money. I also have P.T.S.D.and high anxiety. I can't do it on line either. I do have a psychiatrist I see once a month. Thanks to you I get more information.
Thanks for all you do for us. It truly helps Dr. Fox.
We can talk around it but the problem is we all have a love problem. Some don't get any, some only get it as long as they fulfill the conditions, some steal it. It really is a case of malnutrition of the spirit.
This! I have never felt loved unconditionally by anyone! Nobody has ever held me and soothed me when I was hurting and feeling really really bad emotions. It's always been very clear that I'm not enough and too much at the same time
@@dustybryan91 I'll give you some brotherly love. I never had a brother so I have a lot
@@thereisnosanctuary6184
Right back at ya
Very interesting perspective
@@DrDanielFox I'm an interesting guy. Currently I am absolutely depressed, and that's when my best gems come out.
This video was so helpful, thank you for taking the time to go into such detail. Your channel has been a great source of comfort and insight for me with the shorter videos, but I’d also love to see more of these longer, more in-depth videos. Love the work you do. ❤
Thank you so much for your kind words! I'm glad that you found the video helpful and that my channel has been a source of comfort and insight for you. I'll definitely take your feedback into consideration and try to create more longer, in-depth videos in the future. Keep watching and supporting!
Omg this just in time.
I had to miss a neurological appointment today. I suffer from functional neurological disorder .i
BPD traits along with ..ptsd.
And a few others. Ugh. You are helping me so much to understand my disorder. God bless 🙌 I want to heal so badly
I can’t stop listening to your videos. Thank you for doing what you do!
You’re very welcome and thank you
I never was diagnosed with any mental disorder but wondered what was wrong with me, sometime was missing, that much i always felt. my family has many cases of autism, Asperger’s adhd, dyslexia, early dementia and addictions. Cptsd resonates best with me but i kept on studying about many possibilities to explain the way i felt.
I have a tendency to attract narcissists to my inner circle and now seeing it… i am able to get out of their games… and i have the pleasure to listen to my intuition and i feel whole for the first time in 46 years walking in this earth.
Few years back I could not conceive that living could be this pleasurable.
Maybe menopause has a much bigger silver lining than what I have been told.
🙏
Dr. Fox you are so amazing--this has helped me tremendously. You are also so intelligent.
This was really interesting! It’s nice to see you present to people who are more like your colleagues-you give a different perspective on the subject. And hearing the questions people asked, and your response was informative too.
Thank you. I've had bpd diagnosis.this is so very useful. I recognise myself in the 'Starbucks queue analogy. And how finally I've started applying pause/mindfulness. My better attitude attracts better responses these days. Improvement gives me hope. I'm older. And better!
Being 'ego dystonic' plus having a moderate amount of insight (apparently) has helped
I had specialists diagnose me everything at some point.. adhd in 4th grade, depression, anxiety, bpd, ocd, asd, bipolar, I just want to be “normal”. I’ve always been extremely quiet and shy and lack of facial expressions. I got to the point I feel burnt out from getting help and I’m currently not in therapy.
Same here. In therapy starting at 12 or so until my early 20’s. I’ve tried so many things when I was younger, thinking I just needed to find correct someone. That never happened. Years of therapy and thousands of dollars but absolutely nothing to show for it. At this point in feels entirely pointless to develop relationships.
Whatever help you may choose to pursue in the future, it's important it be based on YOUR agenda. Being quiet and introverted and minimally expressive is not in of itself something wrong that needs to be corrected. Sometimes people with anxiety, depression, autism spectrum etc will present that way... but it does not ipso facto mean that if you are introverted and unexpressive that you naturally have those diagnoses. There's more to it. The real question is whether or not there is something bothering YOU that YOU want to address or work on. All treatment should be driven by your agenda. The exceptions to that are when people are engaging in severely disruptive or destructive behaviors. If you are respecting other people's rights and safety, and keeping yourself safe, and functioning, then the only question is whether or not YOU feel troubled by something and want to do anything about it.
Hang out in nature.
This is a great presentation, and so helpful. Thank you.
Thank you, Dr. Fox and team! You are helping me! 💕
Loved this presentation Dr. Fox!😍
Thank You so much!❤️
Hi Dr Fox, the UK has renamed bpd/eupd with cptsd. Is the same thing going to happen over in the US?
Yes we're going to start calling our elevators, lifts and our trunks, boots.
Excellent presentation!
Great lecture! I'll take a deeper dive into some of these PD's.
Thanks 😊
Hey Dr. Fox, I really enjoyed this video and I appreciate all of the content you put out. Your content is always very educational. It has helped me manage some of my maladaptive behaviors and has taught me how to replace them with adaptive strategies. So, thank you for that. I was wondering if you would make a video about what it would look like/be like for a patient to have BPD or complex BPD and also be on the autism spectrum and how managing both conditions would be different than perhaps pure BPD. Again, thank you for all of your help and amazing content!
You’re very welcome. Be well
Ty. I've grown so much from you.
Thank you so much for your kind words. I wish you well.
Omg a long ass video of your beautiful helpful voice. Thank you so much, I've missed these long take notes and think hard videos. Thank you. And my BPD is getting better all the time. Thank you. ❤❤❤❤❤
Yes, thank you for everything 🙂
Great video Doc!! Would love to see a video on BPD and ketemine. Would be nice to know if it's a road of treatment viable for those with BPD.
I have bpd. Had 5 IV ketamine treatments. Did not help.
Thank you so much for comparing the differences, really appreciate it. I have a few more questions. Most of these disorders have attachment disturbances, As I am diagnosed with Borderline, I recognize I have a disorganized attachment, push pull. As an educator, I have a desire to learn more about the brain everyday. Currently I am reading Attachment disturbances in adults, treatment in Repair. Brown and Elliot discuss metacognition impairment, 4 types of metacognition bpd and d.i.d have the same typre of metacognition impairment and NPD has a different type. I have understand that there are four types of metacognition, but its not clear what the thought process are and what the deficits are. So can they be learned and how? Also is a person has a learning disability how would that effect treatment? is that something that is discussed in therapy?
Thank you for sharing more than just narcs avoid therapy. Actually, if you feel like googling, theres a study that narcissists spend the most money on therapy! They need to be normal the most to act out their movies. Me, a BPD, I would move in my therapist if I could.
lol
Have you seen that series where the serial killer kidnaps his therapist and puts him in his basement because he wants to get better? The guy from 40 Year Old Virgin played the therapist. He ended up killing him lol. But seriously I know what you mean. If I could afford therapy, I’d see the therapist everyday. In the uk it’s almost impossible to get therapy for this sort of problem unless you are very extreme and they end up sectioning you.
This video is a keeper thank you.
WOW..The TWC what do you do for them. Just curious?
I hear my son all day
How can I get your treatment?
I will pay for my BPD.
How can I contact with you?
What if I am treatment accepting but having trouble finding and affording proper treatment?
Great video! Thank you for this one !! ❤
Hi Daniel. Thank you for all your work! Can you recommend an online DBT program to help with emotional disregulation? Although I understand why I become disregulated due to childhood trauma triggers, I continue to struggle to stay regulated with my boyfriend during conflict. I have been trying everything I can think of and watched hundreds of videos and read dozens of books, but haven’t made improvements in the area of disregulation. Thank you for any suggestions you can offer!
Thank you!!
You’re welcome
I have to say that for a long time I also supplemented my pocket money by serving in a bakery in the busiest part of town at a subway stop. Many were under time pressure and often it was not only not enough to friendly courtesy phrases but I was also almost constantly grumbled at. Never in my life would I have thought of attaching this to my person and getting more upset than usual.
Dr. Fox, have you had any dealings with personality disorders- Specifically Borderline and/or Narcissistic in the realm of Parental Alienation? If so, how would you recommend navigating with a parent that has completely pushed their pathogenic parenting onto the child. The child also has began to present lots of the same personality traits?
you are great doctor
Dr. Fox, can you make a video on the disaccociative disorder comorbid with BPD? And can that look like ADHD & BPD behavior wise?
Dr. Fox is AMAZING. Move to Sacramento, Dr. Fox! Or I guess I could move to Texas! Haha. I am having a REALLY hard time finding a therapist for BPD and/or Narcissism. Not really sure what I have.
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
Thanks Dr fox ✌️😊
I want to order your books, especiallythe workbook! Definitely will do very soon ☺️ thank you so much for consistently uploading!
You’re very welcome.
What are your thoughts on someone in active addiction with years of undiagnosed moderate BPD, becoming the Dark Triad during those years of addiction? Causing more C-PTSD on top of childhood C-PSTD? Once diagnosed, where do you start? , Which diagnosis would you treat first?
This was so helpful, thank you!!
I have a question..I've been looking for a good counceller for years..how do I know I've found a good one that can support me but also help me think in new ways...
Is that honestly the best way to heal..?
How do we heal?
"Treatment resistant..." If I hadn't found Dr. Fox's channel, I'm not sure where my hope would be regarding my diagnosis of ComplexBPD.
Thanks!
You're so welcome and thank you for your kind support of the channel. It means a lot when people help support the cause of putting out honest and research based information. Thank you and be well.
I have Bipolar and PTSD, which sometimes people confuse with BPD. And the people who think I have BPD treat me with suspicion like a potential threat until I correct them.
I can't imagine how difficult it must be to actually have it, and have a bunch of ill-informed people believing you're some sort of sociopath.
I've been like this because my birth grew up in a home where she was touched my maternal grandfather touched my birth mother and all through these years it's been going on and on and on consistently through all the men and my family alcoholism mental health all combined because we all came from two different families and it was one big whirlwind when my step grandmother and my maternal grandfather met way before I was born this has been going on for a long time do I have a hard time I do but I know my UPS and my downs and I know my triggers I have a lot of them is it easy on me no it's not but this is 39 years of my life and I'm like wow been diagnosed through the years and years and years nothing nothing same thing same thing you're saving my life because you're breaking it down piece by piece therapist psychiatrist is the same thing over and over oh here take some medication feel better I've been on medication since I was a child they would put medicine in my food just to knock me out where I can get touched or whatever I was a victim I admit it me my birth mother my aunt who is my step grandmother's daughter The outsiders basically we all got shoved aside because of their past and their mistakes and they do it for the kids they don't stop and it goes down the line over and over and over because families have secrets and they everything was hush hush back in the day when I grow up in my home I didn't know any of this until couple months ago when all these secrets came out and all this I'm like wow and I had a mental breakdown I went to a facility in Miami and they threw me out in the freaking streets so I was homeless for a month I went to jail for 38 days for domestic violence and I never put a hand on my fiance or nothing or my kid I lost my cool I had enough because of all this torments I broke out full blown hives all over my body all that stuff because of all these secrets and all these past knowing I had the disease and it took a lot on me do when you take so much all these family secrets how do you respond to something like that when it's been going on before me this has been going on for a very long time in my family secrets and secrets alcoholism mental health and myself will never understand that
HUGS anyway🤗
Do meds help on BPD?
Dr Fox can a person have a combination of the pd type descriptions..??? I feel like I do
Thanks for the great video!
You’re welcome.
It feels like I’m wearing mask and lying when responding to others like I care about them or otherwise find them smart, interesting, funny etc. Every now and then I’m impressed with someone but that is short lived.
Stimulus response= knee jerk reaction.
I'm a true bpd "person" (have all of the traits) so I struggle immensely with relationships and emotions , catastrophising scenarios is a frequent thing, almost daily , tablets help slightly but I need additional help but people get offended by me because i take what they are saying as very demeaning and negative and it upsets me deeply or I get offended by them and then upset them due to my reaction
This was great! but you didn't really cover AsPD at all? I would say the way I experience empathy is pretty high in terms of cognition (I understand why people feel the way they do etc), as well as in terms of somatic manifestation (even if I myself might not really understand or even be aware of an emotion, my body usually goes ahead and mirrors whatever people around me are feeling),
I do very much lack that affective aspect of it (in other words, despite understanding the feelings of those around me, and even sometimes recreating them in myself, I still lack the compassion that would otherwise motivate me to actually do something about it to help them; like "okay? Not my problem").
There are many people who are attracted to me (even though I'm not interested in them), and I'm sure that my high EQ does contribute to my charisma as you mentioned.
As an unrelated side note, I've been a long-time consumer of your content, so despite the fact that lately I've been feeding more into the maladaptive aspects of my traits such as manipulating and hurting others, I've also been quite conscious of the fact that my actions in turn hurt myself, so I'm back again for some mindfulness on my part lol. It's time to take responsibility again and try to get used to boredom again :p
I think my major issue is finding that balance between having fun and being bored; I used to forbid myself from having any fun whatsoever because I'm well aware of my toxicity :p But I'm trying to find healthier ways that are still fun… I've found that if I don't have a healthy outlet for fun, I'll end up taking it out on those around me eventually. It's quite the predicament
And I'm quickly losing interest and finding it difficult to stay invested in my education as well, despite the fact that I _love_ learning, and I know I'll be an exceptional nurse (once I get everything sorted out of course)
Some thing I heard a Psychology Prof/ say other day.., that if ongoing untreated Depression ADHD and PTSD are not diagnosed and treated by age of 40… This can leave long term brain( mental ) damage and MAY be a contributing factor to Dementia from age 60..
I have a family member whose in this situation and who has had Sleep Apnea and extreme anxiety and Work stress for many yrs/ AND I believe this is affecting them. As well as Having a Narcissistic Disorder..! Possibly Covert.. But undiagnosed!
Their memory loss is concerning.. Their Anger/ verbal Abuse / Aggressive outbursts and Outrageous Behaviour is concerning.. to one family member only!
They have been refusing ANY type of treatment or therapy for 30 Odd years!
They have been bringing Flying Monkeys into their life for many years as they have a very Low self esteem, these People boost their ego and they feed off these people! They also hide the real them.. So most people don’t witness their aggression!
How can we get this person to receive Help.? Please? 🙏🏻🎉
So he’s not a liability to a family member as they age?
I hadn't heard that, but it makes sense. I know I have cognitive damage in my mid 40s.
I'm sorry about the family member's issues. Sounds very hard to deal with. Unfortunately, many people don't want to change or even question if they should.
I hope the whole family gets better 🤍
Great I've had so much trauma in my 40s I guess I'm f*****
I am 69 years old. Talk about ...
And I seem to hit my head a lot. Every time makes me worse.
And all the doctors want to do is shut me up with pills that do not work, only makes things worse.
@@suekelsey1329 it's difficult to give advice to somebody older than me. But stop hitting your head so much sounds like advice.
@@thereisnosanctuary6184 Advice taken. Thank you. The reminder is welcome.🙂
A person who has not played football can not teach another in playing football see its simple ❤
Some are treatable, not all are fully treatable.
NPD has to be worked on for life.
It is very much about managing a maladaptive habit.
Obsessive compulsive personality disorder not OCD and the dependent personality disorder how can it be that we are all these that is why people think I am crazy
I don't think a 'conspiracy theorist' is necessarily a narcissist; however, what I found was that the narcissist will personalize and project the conspiracy into the external world and other people. They also will not tolerate anyone who thinks differently
Thank you for your comment and I wish you well.
Trauma and how hard it hits depending on how emotional intelect you are and its the opposide trust me.
Can you talk about how one can develop BPD when one doesn't properly bond with the parents bc of emotional, mental and physical abandonment that is real??? It's not all in one's head. 😢
I have BPD and AVOIDAnCE ALSo DID ADHD Compound PTSD Chronic hyper vigilence Oppositional difiance OCD
It can be overwhelming. Make sure you see a licensed professional who knows how to accurately identify PD and other issues I wish you well.
Are there tests for emotional intelligence out there?
Yes, absolutely.
Autistic people can be abnormally intelligent, so having an intellectual impairment is not appropriate. Hallmarks of autism that can differentiate from schizoid is communication issues.. literal thinking, black and white thinking, sensory issues etc
I was just looking through the comments to see if anyone had picked up on this 🤔 intellectual impairment does not need to be present for an ASD diagnosis. I have a client that was deterred from assessment and told they were "too smart" to have ASD by a previous clinician and this was very unhelpful
@@samp2782 I work in the autism field and it is very rare for intellectual disability to be present.
@@samp2782 I myself am autistic. I am incredibly academic. I have 3 children and two of them have autism. One of them is high needs and has an intellectual impairment.
My narc husband got mad and told me dont try to control me when i just asked him to take out the trash. When asked to clean the kitchen, he left counters and stove covered in soapy gunk. I know hes a narc but he wouldnt go to therapy narcissist narcissist
Your industry is convoluted.
It can seem that way. I hope you find the clarity you’re seeking.
@@DrDanielFox Done!
At times you will have to make a discerning statement or clarification.
I don't understand why would fear of real abandonment which is inherit human condition would be considered disorder
Not ‘inability’.It’s a selective choice,very much. Big difference!!!!
Talking about what PD is 12:45
I have to disagree with you on the insight thing. I have a BPD sufferer in my family and he has insight into everything he does and hoe it affects others. Not everyone is the same.
Once again, lack of socializing ‘village to raise a child’ is so detrimental to human mental & psychological health!
Trust me it isnt so interesting when you live on the downside of a relationship with an abusive passively covert disordered narcissist. It's disgusting frustrating and suffers the psyche.
Personality disorders: what autistic women get diagnosed with.
I was best friends for 30 years with a personality disorder. NEVER again!
These can be very difficult relationships to maneuver, which can then present some very challenging choices. I wish you all the best.
People whom has never experiensed that side of life themsself can and will never ever heal ore help a person whom has experiensed it. It has to be a self experienser who can do that. Look closely thats the truth amd thats what wrong woth sociatys ways of healing. Sp ther you have both cause amd answers
That's me it's crazy
My favourite person right up there 👆👆😁🤪❤
I have been married to my partner for 20 years.
That’s great.
This is too hard. And when your loved ones are Not kind compassionate or loving and Respectful It only makes it Harder. Why continue to try anymore? 😢 why bother?
I think it is situations like this, when a mental health provider can really help you. I wish you all the best.
@@DrDanielFox they can only do so much. What do You recommend? That’s why I watch you
This is inaccurate. People with ASD don’t all have developmental delays or intellectual impairments. ASD level 1 (formerly Asperger’s) is a great example.
And i know for sure because im that one i have beem trough this my self, i have not read it in a book and taking an education in something i have experienst it my self?? Yoy can never define the core truth to this. Its hsp highli sensitive people whom get trauma from the world they was thougt was safe but thats a bog lie parents and teachers tell that is so horrible then finding out that its not like that, and we actualy knew our self that its a lie soo that split our personality. go on read books i know whats the truth
Wait…..most of the people who have great wealth, typically are “Narcissistic or are high on the Narcissistic spectrum. (Not Good.)
I wouldn’t say that. We definitely don’t want to generalize.
Actualy those people whom are suffeeing with mental illness are those people whom is emossional high intelligent those traits wasnt taken serious in early age so trauma hit them harder then others soo its the other way around sorry to say but yoy are wrong
O have always thought zo be able to read ppl well, but i act in a way that is not intelligentnat all when dealing with ppl, like seeing thing but wanting to believe my made up images of them, do and say stupid things, and not separate from ppl early enough
Which makes it worse because it is chosen stupidity 🤣🤣🤣
I'm not exactly comfortable with how you refer to autism as a disorder or that you would look for an intellectual impairment to assess it. If you mean something specific that would be great to expand on but leaving it at that doesn't allow for people to understand that autistic folk are often very intelligent.
He didn't say learning disorder.
I don't think you should feel bad for running over a kid's bike if he left it in your driveway. He shouldn't have been in my driveway or left his bike there. However, if I ran it over in HIS driveway, I would feel very bad and immediately buy him a new bike. I think most people. WITHOUT a personality disorder would agree with me.
Yeah, it was an off the top of the head scenario. I also would be mad kid left HIS damn bike and damaged MY car. Not the best analogy. Anger is a human reaction. And though I MIGHT replace the brats bike, that would be charity in my drive. A duty if elsewhere.
I would feel bad regardless. It's just a kid. You don't have empathy. You have low self esteem instead. You only feel bad because you made a mistake not because the child is going to suffer. And you are so full of yourself too. "Most people without a personality disorder would agree with me" huh? Hopefully someone's bike really scratches your damn car.
Noah was a conspiracy theorist, then it started to rain.
Just because you're a paranoid, doesn't mean they're not still out to get you.
👩🔧 🧠
Push pull ugh
Avoidant
Hip foam mocha drip? Waaa? Who cares
W T F how can dependant be Treatment Accepting and at the same time Treatment Rejecting! How the hell can I take you seriously when straight out the gate there is a massive contradiction in your logic ?