Asexuality | First Person #13 | PBS Digital Studios
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- Опубліковано 19 вер 2024
- In the thirteenth episode of PBS Digital Studios' First Person, “Asexuality,” host Kristin Russo talks with Kara Kratcha, a student of English literature and writer who identifies as grey ace (asexual) and genderqueer. Kara recently completed her senior thesis on asexuality in Sherlock fan fiction and will soon be attending a Master of Library Sciences program.
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Executive Producers: Daniel B. Greenberg & Joe Harrell
Host and Producer: Kristin Russo
Producer, Director: Meredith Heil
DP, Editor: Steve W. Thompson
2nd Camera, Intern: Marc Baill
Sound, PA: Chie Miyajima
Mixed at Nice Manners by Joanna Katcher
Additional Music: "Lovesuit" by Hilotrons via Free Music Archive, (CC BY-NC-ND 3.0)
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I think fanfiction is a great way for teen girls to exsplore their sexuality as an alternative to all the harmful misogyny that goes on in porn, fanfiction can be a wonderful way for them to unlearn sexual shame and explore their fantasies
Goni Z Agree agree agree. We need all we can get out there when it comes to combatting the misogyny and sexual shame that is felt by SO many humans. x, Kristin
I'm so excited this was most requested. Wheeeeeeeeeee!!!!! I feel loved!
Fanfiction is how I first learned the word asexual and realized that if the word described me. And if there was a word, that meant that there had to be other people who experienced these things, and that meant I wasn't alone and I wasn't broken. I was 24.
SMauro Same here (but shy a few years of 24). How awful is that, that there are people who haven't even heard of their own sexualities until their twenties?
"There are all these terms I have to define, before even having a conversation."
Now this quote really sticks out to me! Because it seems to be one of the largest challenges of the emerging awareness/advocacy of all the different gender and sexual identities. There really is a ton of education that has to happen before acceptance can begin, and it takes work. We should all keep speaking up about who we are and what that means, however we identify.
But there really are some terms which really are not clearly defined. I once tried to get a clear definition of "aromantic" but I really could not find one.
I am really happy that this interview exists. It wasn't until very recently that I claimed the title of "grey ace" for myself, and that's because I didn't have the resources growing up to properly understand asexuality. One's orientation is so important, and helping to define it helps so many people like Kara and I feel unbroken.
I first discovered fanfiction around age 13, which coincided with the time I started questioning my sexuality. The pairing was brittana (brittany and santana) from glee. I was identifying as a cisgender female at this point, so seeing their story projected onto tv was a really eye opening thing, but reading the stories online was even better. It truly showed me that these types of relationships were okay, that I was valid in wanting to date/be intimate with women, and types of situations where people like them fall in love. Reading the fiction was a safe spot for me. I felt comfort in the plots, the actions of the characters, the love. I felt like I could relate. And I didn't have to fear these feelings, because it was all in a world that wasn't entirely real. My experience changed a little bit (not drastically) when I realized I was a trans guy (ish) because I was still reading multiple stories with female/female pairings (brittana, faberry and my #1 otp hollstein). I obviously still enjoyed the readings/plots/pairings/etc. but it was somewhat less relatable in a sense that I wouldn't be in a "lesbian" relationship, but a queer and outward presenting "straight" relationship. There aren't many fictions I've seen with trans characters or trans headcanons, so unlike my first go at female/female relationships, I had to sort of discover on my own what it is like to be trans in the dating world (though I have seen a lot of youtube videos talking about trans/dating intersections, I just wasn't getting that from fiction anymore). Overall though, fanfiction plays a huge part in my life, contributing a lot to my happiness, understanding of the world, and ability to express myself through reading and writing. Being able to put a story out there, have people read it, get feedback, is a wonderful thing for an aspiring writer. And being able to read other people's writing and ideas is a special feeling. I don't have one favorite piece of work, but definitely one called Love of My Life really moved me. It was hollstein (carmilla/laura from carmilla series) (excellent series btw do check it out, lots of queer/women rep, anyway) and about reincarnation. I found the idea really cool, but also the writing and emotion in it was just insane and I cried a bit afterwards. I have honestly read so many amazing works, I wish I could talk about them all. But sadly this comment is getting fairly long. In conclusion, fanfiction is very important to me, and thank you for allowing me a space where I could talk about it. Thank you so much (in general) for these videos.
Matthew Stedman just because you might think of boys or think you are gay at 13 does not mean you are gay at that age, almost all boys did that
Matthew Stedman but I still understand you
Matthew Stedman sorry I thought you were a male
All the humans involved with these episodes are doing incredible work. It is nice to finally see people outside of the binary being represented in media. I have so many new heroes, and role models. Thank you for educating.
All negative conversations or actions stem from fear and not understanding. The more resources like this available to the public will help non-binary existances be understood. Thank you again. ❤✊👍
Maeve Higgins
Fanfiction has opened my eyes to a community of amazing people from all around the world, and helped me to discover that I am also grey ace! This way of expressing oneself creatively is a great sorta sandbox for practicing writing skills and for testing out ideas on a constructively critical, complimentary and accepting audience. I literally cannot imagine my life without it! ^^
I'm really glad they talked with someone that identifies as grey ace!
My first boyfriend called me childish and that I would grow out of it. Of course, that was before I knew that asexuality was a thing, and I kind of accepted it more or less.
Honestly just keep it to yourself, it's not like people would understand anyways.A shame ppl cant be more accepting and respectful isn't it? I dont bother telling others I'm asexual.
This was a nice episode, but I do wish their had been some mention of aces of color, because while I have been able to find a fair amount of fanfiction to explore my identity as a white asexual, that isn't the case for everyone. I know that the asexual community on AVEN has had problems with racism in the past, and aces of color may also face additional stereotypes.
***** appreciate this comment immensely - and also hear it very clearly. i commend you for putting into our collective consciousness here in the comments, and will do my absolute best to hit on as many of these intersectionalities as possible in future episodes!
I can't get over how amazing this channel is. Thank you so much for bringing up such interesting topics and open conversations!
loved this episode. my favourite this far.
I love love love that this episode exists. Any chance there's an aromantic/aromantic spectrum episode in the works as well? :)
This is definitely one of, if not the best, videos on asexuality out there.
ok but you rreeeaaalllllyyy should have talked to ace people of color, because we are sexualized and exoticized at a young age. it is especially hard to be non white asexual... like... when the topics of asexuality and nonbinary identities are addressed it always feel very whitewashed and therefore surface level because white people do face oppression for being non cishet but less stigma from the outside world to conform. and ultimately less consequences when they dont conform. (also ive heard white ace people be called childlike but never latinx or black ace people... even though ace people arent childlike obviously, it shows the forced sexualization of people/women of color, we arent allowed to even be childlike.)
Its also hard having a curvy, or hourglass figure because it is such a sexualized body type. Anyone who has an increase is sexualization who is not sexual themselves has a difficult time.
Eli ! I'm Indian but I've definitely been viewed as childish by my peers. I have a very curvy body and do get hit on all the time by random men. So its a mixed experience.
Eli ! stop being a victim okay nothing is stopping blacks
Eli ! why should it matter if there are only whites race should not matter
thank you for this episode! this is a really important topic.
i think i discovered fanfics when i was about 13-14. in hindsight, they played a mayor role in me becoming more and more comfortable with my own sexuality (identity/abel wise but also being sexual as a woman and expressing that) as well as becoming more educated and accepting about other people's identities. fanfics give fans the opportunities to represent themselves & their identities in pop culture and give their community a voice.
I mean, it would have been nice if you had talked to someone who was like, actually asexual?
Because what they're talking about is like,
"it's hard to be gray ace because we're not very visible"
"it's hard to be gray ace because you have to define so many terms"
"it's hard to be gray ace because not everyone thinks it's queer"
And like, that's just related to identifying with an obscure label.
Like all the "hardships" that come with identifying as gray ace go away if you just say "I don't experience much sexual attraction." People are like, "fine, cool, that's totes legit and normal because everyone is different."
Like the ONLY reason anyone ever has a problem with people identifying as gray ace is because they think it's so normal and so obviously okay, it doesn't need to be labeled.
Whereas asexual people actually have problems that come from the orientation itself, not from how they choose to label that orientation. Like idk feeling completely fucking unlovable?
But none of that got talked about because this person doesn't experience any of that because they're not asexual.
Why is it that whenever they find an asexual to talk to its always a grey ace? The struggles they feel aren't really the same as an aromatic or romantic asexual. Sure its important to show what grey asexuality is, but interviewing one as what asexuals are like in general gives people the wrong idea. I've had people use grey aces experiences to to tell me i must have some sexual attraction, or that i wouldn't mind sex. It's very important to explain that other asexuals experience no sexual attraction
It's not a contest. If you truly value queer voices being amplified it shouldn't matter who. These are arbitrary metrics you are using to "gatekeep" asexuality.
This video was 6 minutes and it's PBS. This isn't meant to be exhaustive, but rather an introduction. It's fair and even expected that they would miss some things.
If you feel like there is more to say on the topic, say it. But do not devalue others opinions and experiences because they aren't the "purest".
I found the concentration in Sherlock fanfiction and asexuality to be interesting, as I've never experienced any sort of ace positivity in any fandom - in fact, pretty much the opposite. When I first started coming to terms with my own asexuality about three years ago, I was really into Sherlock/Doctor Who/Supernatural, and was extremely disappointed to find the ways the fandom (and creators) portrayed and discussed characters whom I considered to be asexual. Even when asexuality was brought up in fic, it was usually something that was fixed by the end or the main love interest was the "exception" to the asexual character's sexuality. Steven Moffat, the showrunner of Doctor Who and Sherlock, has even said that an asexual character would be "no fun". So I guess I just really, really want in on this ace fandom community that Kara has found, and also want to know about other people's experiences with being ace in fandom and fanfiction.
Elizabeth Armstrong Hey there! I posted this elsewhere in the comments but you may not have seen it. I made a Sherlock ace fic rec list! It's here on my tumblr: inkweenie.tumblr.com/post/126461614207/asexuality-first-person-13-pbs-digital#notes
Maaaaan, this *really* cleared up my questions on asexuality; given the fact that I've been questioning a lot about which branch of asexuality I fall under. Turns out I'm gray ace!
In other words, this series is splendid. I love it!
Re: Fanfiction. When I was like 13 I was Super obsessed with Wicked (and Idina Menzel) which led to me reading Wicked fanfiction. Which led to accidentally clicking on a fic with a Glinda/Elphaba pairing, which I immediately stopped reading because I was like "I'm so not into this" until the next day when I went back and read that fic and probably all the other fics with a Glinda/Elphaba pairing. This did not immediately clue me in to the fact that I liked girls, but it certainly didn't hurt. And the knowledge I gained from the fics was Definitely useful when I eventually started dating girls. ;)
maybeinvincible omg ZOE. youuuuu areeee sooooo beautifullllll... to meeeeeee. x, Kristin
Fanfiction has been incredibly important to me as I learned about sex and sexuality. Although my high school's sex ed program was better than most, it still left me with huge gaps in my knowledge. When I read fanfiction, I would get curious about the different acts that the characters would perform and I was eager to find more educational resources to understand them. Fanfiction also does a wonderful job at times of showing the emotional impact sex can bring into a relationship, both positive and negative, which is something that no one in "real life" ever seems to talk about.
I'm a genderfluid queer aro-spec ace and I love reading longform H/C fanfiction across a number of fandoms. The reason I like that particular genre is that H/C fanifcs tend to focus on non-sexual non-romantic relationships. It's hard to find mainstream stories in the media that don't highlight heteronormative romantic couplings and reading fanfiction gave me the chance to see that other people really did have relationships like mine.
Loved this episode, great work Kara!
This was a great profile, though I think it skipped over one of the big hurdles for the asexual people I know: making it clear to others that asexual doesn't mean aromantic for everyone even though society so strongly correlates relationships and sex. It's possible Kara very briefly approached this when she said she had developed friendships and relationships from her interactions online, but I also don't want to assume that she meant romantic relationships.
One major point of contention: not all fanfiction is romantic and/or sexual in nature. What you're talking about is "slashfiction", a subgenre of fanfiction that explores the relationship between two or more characters. On its own, fanfiction can refer to any story about pre-existing characters or series created by a fan.
KRX50 slashfiction isn't "a subgenre of fanfiction that explores the relationship between two or more characters" -- slash means male/male same sex romantic and/or sexual relationships being explored in fanfiction (or fanvideos). There's also "het" (heterosexual romances explored or man/woman even if one character is bisexual), and "femslash" (female/female same sex romantic and/or sexual relationships explored) and "Gen" (non-romantic and non-sexual or "General" fanfiction).
luvtheheaven5 Ok I'm a big nerd so I'm just popping in to say that one of the cool things about ace fic (fan fiction about/featuring asexual characters or relationships) is that it breaks not only relationship conventions but also fan fiction genres! It doesn't really fit into slash or het or gen or maybe it fits into all of them! Ah! Wow! How queer!
Yes very cool. It depends on if the asexual character(s) is (or are) aromantic, or have a romantic orientation that is being explored in a romantic relationship, I guess. ;)
thank you so much for this video, great to see asexuality being talked about. I was hoping there would be a link to Kara's research on sherlock fanfiction & asexuality, so do you know where I can find more of Kara's writing/research at all? I study fanfiction myself and would be so interested! (also, personally, I owe a huge debt to sherlock fic in particular as that's where I 'discovered' asexuality back in 2011). another great video in the first person series, thanks! (even more so if you can help me!!)
Having to define terms to people is one of the main things that keeps me from telling people I'm ace. I'm not that comfortable talking about sex, especially outside of a small group of close friends, so having to describe myself as not experiencing sexual attraction or having to field questions about what asexuality is is not the most comfortable thing for me. As I result I never mention it to my family or most friends and just hope that they notice my lack of relationships and get that I'm not looking for relationships. Broader awareness of ace people would help me tremendously.
Thank you for this. I wish there was more though.
Thank you, this interview was fantastic!! ^_^
Madeline - Thank you!!!
my fav fanfiction has to be "A Splitting Of The Mind" or "Folie Á Deux"
My favorite fic is These Strange Steps by thememoriesfire. It's a Faberry fic.
adrenalinejunnkie so basically bc of this episode i am going to just stay in my room for weeks reading fan fiction. THANKS. x, kristin
There was an excellent fanfiction I loved when I was about fourteen about Hermione and Ron getting snowed into Hagrid's hut right after Ron asked Hermione to the yule ball as a last resort and she got mad at him. Our computer was in my dad's room and I wanted to read it after he went to bed so I printed it out and read it in my room. I'm pretty sure I still have the printout somewhere. It was my favorite thing ever.
Thank you!!
Come to think of it, this is the first time in my entire life that I've ever seen a non-binary person appear in a nonfiction work that is not focused on their gender or lack thereof.
The hard thing about depicting ace characters in media is that it is the lack of a romance arc. I'm writing a book with an ace main, but none of my beta readers have figured it out.
Yeah. Most tv writers tend to fail to realize that asexuality doesn't equal aromantic (which is another identity that's sorely lacking). Asexuals can have a romantic dimension to their lives. They just go about it differently. I hate the shows & films where they go straight to bed first before establishing anything. I prefer the stories where they actually take their time to establish their romantic circumstances.
***** I know, it's just in media made for the age when sex isn't spoken about between characters, it's hard.
finally a Gray Ace representatives. I've been told by many It's not real I'm just like everybody else. so when someone ask if I'm attracted and said "not really" then they'll accuse me of being too picky.
Wow, awesome video. Yay ace representation!
i love this and i love you and i am so happy you and this exists and from this episode and tylers episode i am like so so happy about it and just yes thank you
Library science woo!
I hope they make one about Aromantic
I'm pretty sure Kristin would be the best sex-ed teacher. Ever. Am I right? peace x
And oh my gosh, this got featured in the Huffington Post Gay Voices newsletter! Big time!
Is there a pansexual episode yet? Because I really need to see the representation for my community :/ I hardly ever see any unless I force myself to look for it.
Thank you thank you thank you.
Alice Sabbatini thank YOU. seriously. xx, Kristin
Chew your pepperoni kara! Also hydrate! Nice
Samuel Flax HA.
Decent video. It's nice to see a channel about sexuality explore my identity. However, I didn't really like how she said how do we align with queer communities. We don't "align" with them like some ally. We ARE a part of the queer community. I also would have loved for them to explore the fact that aces can have various romantic orientations as well (aromantic, homoromantic, biromantic, panromantic etc) because as a pan ace, I'm sick of hearing that sexual orientation is who you love. I think it's important when discussing asexuality to mention there can be a difference in romantic versus sexual orientation. I also feel like Sophia missed the point a bit: Kara had just explained asexuality to her, but then she made it sound like not wanting sex was what made her queer. The lack of interest or desire in sex, while it can be a big part of the ace community, is not of itself inherently queer. Allosexuals can not want to have sex but that doesn't make them queer. What makes you queer is not being cis, heteroromantic, and heterosexual; therefore, because aces, no matter romantic orientation are not sexually attracted to the opposite binary gender, they are automatically queer. *sigh* Hopefully one day people will understand this better. You can have more than one video on asexuality, as well. Go a bit deeper. It would also be nice to have a video on aromaticism and pansexuality/panromanticism.
Y'all should do a video about polysexuals :3
You should not have asked us to talk about fanfiction, I'm obsessed but I'll try to refrain my crazyness.
Mainly I read wolfstar (Remus Lupin and Sirius Black) because they are my OTP, and my favourite has to be Text Talk, although I love so many! Reading Text Talk was actually where I first heard about pansexuality, and I identified with that label for a while as I was still discovering my sexual orientation.
I think some queer people may actually use fanfiction to learn more about having sex in other ways than what we are taught at school, but I'm not sure that's a great idea just because it isn't supposed to be educational so may not be the best place for safe sex ed. Do you have any thoughts on this??
I haven't actually seen many where the main characters are asexual or gray asexual- do you have any recommendations?? Especially maybe Johnlock where Sherlock is asexual because that sounds like something I'd like to read!
Wow I've ranted sorry but anyway I really loved this episode and am gonna try to look for a larger variety of representation in fanfics from now on :)
Becca Bailey OOH good question, I WILL EMAIL KARA AND ASK. brb. x, Kristin
Becca Bailey Hey there, Kara here. I made a whole long tumblr post of fic recs just for you! Here it is: inkweenie.tumblr.com/post/126461614207/asexuality-first-person-13-pbs-digital#notes
+Kara Kratcha THANK YOU!!!! I loved the first one and now I'm gonna be obsessed with asexual Sherlock and I plan to read all of the ones you recommended so thanks :D
Also, this was really no one's fault and maybe I'm just oversensitive, but as an autistic ace person I found Kara's comment about being "stunted socially or developmentally" as one of the negative stereotypes kind of hurtful.
xTheInksane I've been thinking about your comment and howto respond since you posted it. I just want to say that I'm so sorry my comment hurt you, and I don't think you're being oversensitive. This is something I'll keep in mind in the future.
Kara Kratcha I appreciate your apology and thank you for taking me seriously.
Most acefic I have found ends up with the ace character "compromising" (and being willing to have sex with their partner) or finding "the one" ("Wow I was totally ace before but somehow I am inexplicably sexually attracted to you!"). And seeing that as the norm, or what is expected, ended up being really harmful for me, and I'm not the only one. There's tons of positivity (mostly in the allo community I think) for asexuals who choose to have sex, but then when it comes to sex-repulsed asexuals, it's just * crickets *.
(And exploring asexuality in terms of romantic relationships is all well and good, but I have yet to find a single fic with an aromantic character that isn't about "exceptions".)
xTheInksane wow, that's a shame.
ahh i feel like it does need more talking about! discussing those issues would help so much. at least so non ace queer people know more- like right now im super frustrated about my ignorance/ but happy that you + this video taught me so much!
TheTwigCrackedAnd at least you want to learn! that's a good step forward. 👍
xTheInksane I've noticed this as well and it really needs discussion! There's a huge problem when the primary story told in acefic presents asexuality as an obstacle that is overcome by love to emphasize the strength of that love, and in the process the story often negates the identity of the ace character and by extension aces at large.
i agree 500%.
there's also the problem that non-aces with ace partners see this media and assume that all aces are willing to compromise. (my ex literally used this as an argument against me. "ok but in these fanworks character x is ace but still willing to have sex with y." i am not character x even if i rp them with you sorry.) i can't imagine that happens with everyone, but the fact that it does happen is still HUGELY problematic.
i know of a (non-ace) fanartist, a huge section of whose work is basically "porn" of an ace character who does not enjoy sex passively letting their partner do whatever. and non-ace people (like my ex) see this and think it's the norm. and that is the opposite of okay.
there's nothing wrong with ace people who like sex or who are willing to have sex but they shouldn't be the only ones viewed positively, and they shouldn't be the only aces the allo community sees.
An episode on trans people that are gay
Alex Gonçalves YEP. yes. an episode on the complexities and differences within and between sexuality and gender identity is super necessary. high high on our list!! x, kristin
I suppose I understand a bit more about what it means to be Asexual but I still don't think they should be considered part of the LGB community. People who are LGB, specifically "G", have been subjected to life threatening violence and discrimination because of type of sex and sexual attractions they have. If you don't have sex or sexual attractions then you can't really relate.
Louis Bourbon You can't really say "specifically gay" because that negates the pain and suffering experienced by the other groups. You don't have to have experienced life threatening violence in order to be queer, you just are because you're 'outside' of the heteronormative standards. People who are lesbian, bisexual, trans, and asexual (and many of the other categories) experience discrimination and violence as well. Asexuality is a sexuality that is "other" and therefore included as queer.
FearTheFlowers I specifically called out the G in LGB because they have had it worse than others. Let's be real here, most heterosexual men (you know, the group most likely to commit these types of hate crimes) get aroused at the thought of two women having sex. Two men holding hands are a hell of a lot more likely to experience weird looks, lewd comments, verbal threats and actual violence. Asexuality is not a sexuality. That's like calling atheism a religion. Lack of interest/participation in sex cannot be called sexuality. We don't need to have any more groups trying to leech off of the LGBT movement. It's starting to get ridiculous with the whole LGBTQIAXYZABC123.
Louis Bourbon A lot of aces do face discrimination, silence, and misrepresentation, though. In studies like "Prejudice against Group X" and "Attitudes towards Asexuals (ATA) Prejudice Scale," it was found that asexuals are even more dehumanized and discriminated against by straight people than LGB people are, and even the LGB discriminates against the A. This, plus a lack of visibility, makes a lot of aces who don't know they're ace because nobody ever told them it was even possible hurt themselves and a lot of others hurt them once they're out, up to and including corrective rape. Asexual people are only truly safe when invisible - like all other queers - and when they are not, they are under threat from violence that is often actualized by strangers, acquaintances, false friends, relatives, parents, and even the medical community.
This also says a lot about the nature of discrimination against all queers, not just aces. Hate likely comes from a thought that differences create deficiency - that gay people aren't lesser because they're gay and bi people aren't lesser because they're bi and trans people aren't lesser because they're trans, but that they're all lesser because they're not both cisgender and straight.
Lgbt+ community is about being different than straight, and not being completely accepted in the straight community for their sexual, romantic, or gender identity. Its not some oppression olympics, and they all face their own discrimination. Lesbians and gay people tend to suffer more outright violence, but that could be do to the fact they have more visibility than asexual and bisexual people. Asexuals and bisexuals are not seen as 'real orientations' by many outsiders, and even face discrimination and disbelief within lgbt+ communities. and often do face discrimination when they attempt to let their orientation known. So why try to separate the groups with the oppression Olympics? Why can't we just support each other and be allies, helping to pass laws making it a safer word for us all?
Studying fan fiction? Nonbinary? Where am I? This is the tumblr of UA-cam. DISLIKE
listen, I'm asexual, but this is just ridiculous and gives people the wrong idea. It's pretty cringeworthy at best.