To be honest, if the bride PAYS for your bridesmaid/MOH dress and has no problem with what you wear *after* the ceremony and the photos, i would consider the dress as a work uniform lol
Exactly! Most of the time bridesmaids have to buy a dress that's ugly and they will never wear again. The fact that this bride paid for the dresses means you do what she wants for three hours and SUCK IT UP! Block Kat's number, she deserves all the stigma!
I didn't have any bridesmaids just a MOH and I bought her a dress that could be worn to multiple occasions. It was my gift to her for being my MOH and I made sure she liked it before I bought it.
So the second story actually has an update, so I’ll just post it here so no one has to go looking for it: UPDATE! WIBTA if I go on vacation instead of my brothers wedding? So unfortunately since reddit is awful at keeping secrets, Becky saw the post on TikTok so she obviously let the cat out of the bag. My whole family is split on what I should do, but after a heated argument it was mutually agreed that I will not be attending the wedding. My brother and FSIL cannot seem to comprehend that this is not about the dress but how they treated me. For those wondering what our parents have to say, our mother says "if you're gunna be an asshole don't be upset when someone's an asshole back" my dad says "..." Because he's long dead. My brother & FSIL thinks I am the asshole but by the way my mom paid for the hotel for my trip, I think it is safe to assume whose side she's low key on. I appreciate all the love and support I got, I will have an amazing time in Maimi and won't feel the slightest bit guilty thanks to the overwhelmingly positive response I got on here. Thanks you all!
@@susanmartin5525 oh you’re welcome! I’d read this story myself sometime before this video came out and knew there was a more satisfying ending that people would like.
My dear I sincerely believe your brother will be sadly divorced within 5 to 10 years and paying lots of child support if she gets pregnant because this sounds like someone who's just marrying him for whatever he can offer her at this time This isn't a kind person This isn't the kind of woman he should be with but this is the kind of woman he picked. Probably if your father hadn't been long dead it would be a better situation because it sounds like your mother is a very beautiful woman and your father had very good instincts.
1 point to consider with "your punishing your brother and he hasn't done anything" is HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING. He's letting his entitled fiancée walk all over his sister and expecting everyone else to allow it.
Thank you for pointing that out. I hate it when people cry " I didn't do anything! " Yeah, sometimes doing nothing is worse than doing something smallish bad. Braid to be had no problems that she spend 2 years helping, spending and supporting.. but suddenly she wants someone else to be the Braidsmaid. .... not buying it.. and then saying "You should just handover your Dress that You paid for ..." and later willing to give not even half the price for it. Would not shock me it that was the plan from the beginning.
My thoughts too! He allowed it to happen and he was involved with trying to get her to sell the dress at a loss. That's like a double kick in the pants!
what's stupid is forest green is one of those colours that suits EVERY skin tone. Pale skin it makes you look etheral. Dark skin brings out the richness in skin tone like a queen. Mid-Olive skin makes your features pop and you shine like a diamond. It's honestly one of the perfect bridesmaid colours.
So true... From West Africa and I love that color , funny enough after seeing it on a red head with alabaster skin. It's just one of very few colors we can share. Green is the Mariah Carey of colors
Meh, I personally think I look hideous in forest green, and I have pale skin (paler than Charlotte in the picture she showed). It kinda makes me look sickly 😂
Plus it slims you down instead of a light color that makes you look heavy. It honestly is one of the few rare colors because it is the color of the Earth that's not boring like tan brown rust.
Mother: "How DARE you not trust me to show up in time for your wedding?" After she did, in fact, not show up in time for what she thought was the start time for the wedding. Zero self-awareness.
The fact she was 45 minutes late to what she thought was the start time…to her own son’s wedding…why?!? I’m half an hour early to something and I feel late. lol.
I would’ve just not invited her after missing the graduation, the mother not being self aware is concerning, narcissists come in many different forms and aren’t always mean or horrible
So many people get pissed and say things like "you've embarrassed me!" when it was their own actions and lack of respect for others that caused the embarrassment in the first place. And I THINK THAT'S EMBARRASSING!!
Exactly! In the 1980s, I had a couple of friends we used to go on some wild camping trips with. Jo and Keith were both very funny people and so sweet. They planned THEIR dream wedding, and it was adorable! They bought the clothes for their wedding party and handled all expenses, the guest only had to pay for transportation to VEGAS! (Baby!) but the couple found great deals on flights for them. I was so mad I had to work that day so I missed the wedding of the decade. The guests were told nothing about the theme or wedding colors, just that each outfit was chosen especially for each guest and would be ready for them when they arrived. The husband had previously gone to an auction of a costume rental store that went out of business and bought about 20 costumes for cheap. Being the groom he got first choice, so he was a Godzilla groom. Now the bride of course wore a beautiful white dress... over her gorilla costume. I think the best man was the Mad Hatter, but I don't remember the others. It was years later that I finally realized they went for the "Godzilla vs King Kong" wedding theme. It started out that only the wedding party was going to wear costumes, but when their two families got wind of it, they all decided to join that fun and brought their own. I've seen the wedding photos and I laughed until I hurt! I wish they'd taken video of when the entire wedding party walked into the courthouse wearing their wedding "finery" to get the wedding licence (no waiting period in Vegas) then walked across the street to the tacky chapel to be married by Elvis. 20 years later, I got married at that same chapel but my husband wouldn't spend the extra 40 bucks to get Elvis to marry us (red flag! I had my heart set on that, my only request). The guy who took our wedding photo was a swinging hep cat who's a dead ringer for Sammy Davis Jr., so at least for that!
@@ahoward3503 This. With how she threw a tantrum and told the bride to fuck off it was pretty clear that she knew what she was doing. She couldn't handle not being the center of attention in some way and decided to behave like a toddler.
The fact that the brother was on his awful fiance's side, expecting his sister to give away an 800 dollar dress, is all I need to know about him. So she expected the sister to let someone else wear the dress first, and then she could have it back and keep it? That's gross. Also, for the most part, bridesmaid dresses are not really re-wearable. Double gross. I say go Miami and have a good time where you won't be disrespected by family!
I am STUNNED that the HORRIBLE "friend" not only PURPOSELY WORE A BLACK DRESS when she was told to wear the forest green dress that the bride PAYED FOR, but she also insisted that the bride OWES HER MONEY for not being able to wear the black dress she SELFISHLY bought herself. And on top of everything, SHE called the bride "selfish and inconsiderate" for not allowing her bridesmaid to wear WHATEVER THE F*** SHE FEELS LIKE WEARING. I am ASTONISHED at how many sh*tty friends these brides have. I would have had absolutely NO PROBLEM kicking her out of my wedding.
I am a wedding photographer and did a wedding for a friend of mine. She had a black wedding dress and SPECIFICALLY set two rules: no one else wearing black, and NO cell phones during the ceremony. Just before the first look, I saw her future SIL not only hanging out in the area that was restricted to bridal party only (she was trying to get and post shots BEFORE the wedding even started!) but she was also wearing a VERY TACKY black dress that was totally inappropriate for a church wedding. I let the bride and groom know and they gave me permission to proceed with my job as I saw fit. In every group picture, I had the SIL in a middle row so her dress was always covered by the people in the front row, and during the ceremony, every time she STOOD UP or held her phone all the way up to either take pictures or try to live stream the event on Facebook, I conveniently "had to suddenly move to a different angle" to take a new picture. The SIL never caught on but EVERYONE else knew and by the end of the wedding I was a legendary MVP of the day.
She hid the dress in a bag, lied about it when asked beforehand and showed up late in the hope of sneaking past the bride. So yeah, she knew exactly what she was doing and trying to force her way. If she wanted to wear black, then step down as a bridesmaid and be a regular guest, then she can wear whatever she likes Honestly surprised she even gave her a warning and chance to change. I'd have kicked her out the second I saw her in a black dress after repeatedly telling her not to beforehand and even discussing it barely an hour prior in which she said "this is for after the ceremony"
@@philipandrews9938It doesn't say anything about her hiding it. It says she had "a bag that looked like it had a dress inside". I was picturing one of those bags that goes on a hanger so it doesn't wrinkle and zips and unzips that you would keep a nice dress or suit in.
My mom and dad got married in December, so my mom chose (guess what?) forest green velvet bridesmaids dresses. They had cap sleeves and empire waists, and all the bridesmaids looked SO pretty in them! Even all these decades later, those dresses are still flattering in the pictures. That girl was crazy.
It's so damn insulting that the 2nd story's bride and groom (the brother) thought it was okay to give the $800 dress to the "new" bridesmaid for free... like wtf?? if they wanted the bridesmaid to wear it, either she pays or they pay it for her. And also what kind of bridesmaid dress cost $800 that will only be used once?? Add to the insult that the sister was being replaced after a year or so of being the bridesmaid.
I can't believe there are bridesmaids dresses that cost $800!! Who in the world would ever have the balls to ask someone, or several people, to spend that much on a one-time dress???
@@lisamelroy2855 exactlyyyy and the fact the bridesmaids have to be the one to pay for it. If it was like the first story of the bride and groom paying it would’ve been better ish coz that’s normal in my culture for the couple to pay for everything wedding related.
Oh, if I was a female, and that happened to me, I'm well off enough that I could afford to be ultra-petty in my revenge. I'd let the replacement wear the damn dress. Then I'd wear that thing to EVERY event SIL was going to be at with me. It doesn't matter if it was a pool party on the 4th of July or Thanksgiving dinner. If I was ever queried on it, I'd say it was an expensive dress and I was making sure I got full value out of it.
I think it's curious that she happens to be the same size, my guess is Becky was gonna be bridesmaid all along but couldn't pony up the cash or time for the initial stuff and this was all planned, sis was just a placeholder. Trifling heifer thought it would fly because "family". Or maybe I'm just jaded.
Our wedding colors were purple and blue. Because most of our wedding party were traveling in- we didn’t want a nightmare of trying to do matching outfits. I can’t imagine doing fittings, etc. and we had an array of body types and races and would never want to force someone into something they didn’t feel comfortable in. So we just gave guidelines: Women had to wear purple dresses. Any length. Any shade of purple. Just had to be purple. If they wanted accessories they could be any kind and any style- they just had to be silver. Men had to wear grey or black dress pants, a white dress shirt, and any shade of blue tie. We gifted everyone their shoes- women wore light purple Vans, men wore Avengers Converse (different characters for each, that they had pre-selected). It was easy for everyone to buy what they needed and while it didn’t “match” it was all complimentary and everyone looked so good- Individually and in our group shots! It had the vibe of a bouquet of wildflowers- not matching but beautiful.
At this point in my life, if somebody is going to show up 45 minutes late to something as important as a wedding, I'm not making any special concessions for them like inviting them early. I'm going to start on time and lock them out and they can miss it. So that mother can just be thankful that her son cared enough to make her be on time.
Honestly being chronically late is a real mental problem (I’m a chronic late person myself), but I really really try for special occasions. She should’ve gotten help decades ago to help with her punctuality problems.
Truth is that mother did not want to be on time, it’s her way to make everyone wait for her, she’s sick. People in Latin America come late, but ALL come late, this one here, she’s taking a dump on everyone’s head.
I will never understand bridesmaids who get so fussed about the dress. As someone with a lot of body image issues, I'm not going to stress out a friend, close enough to be a bridesmaid for, on the day of her wedding. The first time I was a bridesmaid, we didn't even go shopping. The bride sent us a link to the dress she wanted us to get, told us the color she wanted, and I bought it without ever having worn something with that shape before, having no clue what I'd look like. The last time I was a bridesmaid, we went shopping, and all of the bridesmaids loved the only dress we tried on that I detested. One of the bride's biggest things with the dress we picked was that she wanted it to be something we could wear again, even if we had to shorten it. I told the bride in the store that I didn't like the dress and that it wasn't something I'd wear in public again, shortened or not (nothing that hadn't been said by at least one bridesmaid with other dresses, everything was civil). But it was the only dress that more than two bridesmaids could agree on, and I could tell she was struggling because she wanted everyone to be happy. So I told her if she liked the dress for her wedding, I'd wear it for her. Her wedding, her call. Nothing would stop me from being there for her on the big day. Sometimes people just need to accept that it's not about them.
The only time I was a bridesmaid, the bride 👰🏻 was actually a fashion designer and she picked the color forest green for all of us, but because of our different bodies, she actually designed our dresses to flatter our unique bodies. The accents were also gold. She paid for everything and was the kindest bride I’ve ever seen especially considering I binge watch all your videos and bridezillas going rogue is my favorite. And yes I think we all wore the dresses again! 3:08
What a delight for every single one of you!!! It must have felt like a dream to be a part of her wedding!!!! And what a thoughtful, beautiful and caring act upon your friend!! I imagined that you all felt like princesses that day as she treated each of you just as special as the other!!! BRAVA 👏👏👏👏
That makes sense! I'd understand if the cut of the dress wasn't flattering and the bridesmaid in the story freaked out like that, but forest green is a beautiful colour that flatters every skintone imo
My mom is one of those women who is never on time for things. With her it's not that she is procrastinating, but she is one of those personalities where she CAN'T let undone tasks remain undone. Even if we are running a half hour late for something, she'll still be doing dishes or cleaning the cat litter box or even scrubbing the floor, because in her brain, if she does not do the task right away, then it will never be done later. So I have more than once used the tactic of giving an altered time to get her out the door in a timely fashion.
I’d block the other bridesmaids who think the bride was being an AH too. How in the world could you know the details and not put the blame squarely on the ex-friend? I’d seriously be questioning my relationships with any of these people.
I noticed the bride in that story is young (23 I think). And while anyone can act entitled and childish at any age, the behavior of the friend tracks for someone her age. And if her friends agree with her, it makes sense especially if they’re all still the same level of immaturity. I feel like if the friend group was older and some women were already married, they wouldn’t have agreed with the friend who wore black as much.
@@melissaherrera94023 is young??? 18 is young, 23 is old, but if she can handle being an adult, she should not marry, bc marriage is no joke, also imagine someone as immature having children, people like that make up are horrible mothers, no matter how old they are, bc 23 is old.
@@inkagarden8939 I said she’s young because a lot of people in their early 20s are still more likely to make mistakes, do reckless things and act irresponsibly. That doesn’t mean it’s right and that they should do it. I think that’s too immature for that age. But at 23, this bridesmaid could probably still grow as a person and realize later on she was acting like an AH along with her friends who supported her. Or that could just be the person she is and she’ll always be that way which is why she has those friends who were on her side 🤷🏽♀️. But I do still think 23 is young, at least still young enough to grow and change.
@@melissaherrera940 Well, I thinl we can always grow and change, but when someone is already a piece of crap at 23, there‘s little chances they will ever grow and change indeed. They might adjust themselves here and there, but crappy behavior is already seen in childhood. It‘s natural to make mistakes, we are all humans, but mistakes is one thing and another is when your true character shows up, for me if she was acting like this at 13, maybe, maybe, with much luck…she might change, but I would say at even 13, she is showing what kind of person she will be and she will be crap. Maybe under 10, or under 5 years old, is this kind of behavior still in time to change??? Character is formed from the womb till 2 or 3 years old, still quite good to influence till age 5. After that, the corner stones of who you are already laid, if you suffer trauma, yes that might change you, but normally trauma does not change things as entitlement, trauma might even deepen the entitlement the person, even in covert ways that will show up later on. It‘s like people in emergency situations taking something important/life rescuing for others to themselves, just in case.
Punctuality means different things in different cultures & countries. I used to go to New Dehli for business twice a year, and it took me a few trips to wrap my head around the fact that when someone said " oh we'll eat in like 10 minutes" "or we'll be there in about a 1/2 hour" that was always closer to an hour or more. The lesson was not for an entire culture to change but for me to chill out & trust things would get done eventually, and no good would come from stressing out about it. I attended many Indian weddings over the 20 years I traveled there, and even then time was a concept, not a rule. Happiness & enjoying the day was the purpose. Obviously there are things like going to court or classes where time is important. Just gotta know the difference. I began to love my trips there because they were more like a vacation than work, and all the work still got done.
I'm an Indian. We do have ceremony-coded colours but thats hardly a "rule", especially today. Also, there literally is no rule where in a specific colour is only for the bride. Even so, I've always asked the bride what her saree colour is and what colour would she be okay with me dressing up in. That's just basic courtesy. If my friend said to avoid red, my saree wouldn't even have minute red design on it. I'll run in opposite direction of that shade family altogether (no reds, oranges, or anything in between). I wonder why anyone would feel like not listening to the person whose day it is. It's literally not that hard!
A person who would deliberately wear the wrong dress against the wishes of the bride is just someone being selfish and entitled. You have empathy and respect for other people, so you take their wishes into consideration.
I think Indian weddings are very beautiful! Especially the clothing. I think what I love most is that it's not just the bride who is dressed like royalty, but the grooms also. The grooms dress like a handsome prince from a fairy tale. I think we have too many selfish people who forget that it's the couple's day, and if they are true friends, they will follow some simple requests and do their part to make the day special for the couple. As you said, "It's literally not that hard!"
I had to laugh at the late mother story. I had the opposite problem with my Father-in-law. He was always WAY early to everything. We would often have my in-laws over for Sunday dinners and other events. He would make mom come over at least an hour early if not more. Once I was still in the shower! It took me years to figure out to just tell him that lunch was at 1:00 instead of noon so he’d be right on time! After a while I got up the nerve to tell my sister-in-law what I was up to, and she started doing it too for events at her place. 😇
I come from a Latino family and they are chronically late for everything. I always tell them when to arrive 2 hours earlier than the "real time" so they get there "almost" on time. I find it incredibly disrespectful when people don't show up on time.
Yeah but it's also hard to get somewhere on time as well. What if you have to travel from far away? It's like me and my family when we have to go to my uncle's house for Thanksgiving. We live an hour away from them and we're always late because of my mother and because we live an hour away. It's not like we live only ten minutes and it's no big deal. They get mad at us for being late but if we had a big party, they'd show up late anyway because they'd know how long it takes to get there and stuff. It's ridiculous but that's how my mom's side of the family is. They think they should show up late because we always show up late. It's really annoying, especially since my mom's side of the family complains that WE'RE late but if they ever want to visit us, THEY would be late.
@@Supersoccerchicgiving advice front someone that's also bad with times bc adhd Usually I try to think of how long a drive would be max (like all red lights and some traffic) I would also try to add-on the "how long it takes for me to get ready to leave" part because that can vary As in, normally a drive would be 30 minutes, but i add how long i think it would take to get through traffic and all red lights and it jumps up to around an hour. And also, communicate of anything unexpected/more delays pop up. One of my friends are regularly late and im ok with that because she also communicated that she had a job that she got out very late from
@@SupersoccerchicI understand your frustration but I also understand your family’s retaliation. Being late is a huge pet peeve of mine so I would do what I had to do to get the family in the car an hour and a half prior to the start time to account for traffic. If that means fudging on the start time of the event or telling everyone that the car was leaving two hours early (to ensure I had an hour and a half) then so be it. Or take separate cars. If mom doesn’t mind being late then she can be late but I won’t be. 😉 Having said all that, I also understand that moms have a tendency to be late for a myriad of reasons. Usually it’s because they are trying to “herd cats” (I.e. husband and kids), everyone else has to be gotten ready first (or they’d show up in rags), she is worried about a million and two things everyone else is oblivious to, and/or she had to change outfits several times because they just didn’t look right. Or she is selfish and needs the attention. 😉 Either way, I’ve mellowed with age and try not to make it a big deal. If someone is late, they’re late but the event kicked off on time. I’m sorry that your family has chosen to retaliate and complain instead of finding a more peaceful solution but try not to let it upset you. 🫂
Not this bride buying everyone green dresses, and this "friend" brining her own and LYING about it to her face, then gets upset for tricking her last minute and calls her a terrible friend. Bride paid for the maids' dresses, you bought your own to be sneaky, no reimbursement necessary.
Fun fact- we did a similar thing with the time for my wedding. My husband’s parents have no concept of time and we told them to be there an hour earlier than they needed to be for photos and all (photos really were an hour before but we told them to arrive even earlier similar to OP in this video). Well, even with that they showed up just as the wedding was about to start so they missed the family photos. It kinda worked out in the long run that they weren’t in the photos cause that was the last straw for my husband (many other more important issues going on but the fact they were that late to his wedding really set him off) and he hasn’t had a relationship with them since. We’ve been married 10 years.
I have close family friends who are always 15-30 minutes late to things. So I tell them to be there 30 minutes before the actually start time, and they think it's smart. People need to be more self aware
My Neice did this and had us sitting for an hour in a hot church waiting for her arrival, unfortunately my son in law, at the time, had to go and put more money on the car (pay and display) and nearly interrupted her walk down the aisle 😂😂
The story about parents always late- my family ALWAYS lies to me about what time we're supposed to be there because I'm late for everything! It makes me right on time, no hurt feelings here😂
This is why I'm happy with how I'm doing things. Our wedding colors are black and red so I asked all my bridesmaids to wear whatever black dress they feel comfortable in. I can't afford to buy everyone a dress but I also don't want to make everyone buy something specific and then waste money on something they won't wear again. We're all broke out here so trying to keep things simple.
A young friend of mine did the same thing: all attendants could wear a black dress of their choosing. It was fine other than one gal showed up in a patent leather-like mini dress and the lighting in the photos made her stick out like a sore thumb.
Those are my favorite weddings! So much more relaxed. My friend's son had a barn wedding with straw bails and blue jeans. They have money but both parties wanted simple. It was beautiful, and relaxed.
Forest green is so pretty, I love deep greens, Phthalo green is my favorite. And also, the mom in the last story sounds a lot like my grandma, when it's like 30 minutes before she has to go somewhere she will take a shower. Like grandma, 30 minutes before an event is when you should be walking out of the door 😂
I was once married to someone who was habitually late for everything. I'm more like Charlotte where I actually have anxiety about being punctual and can't stand it when people repeatedly arrive late for important things. My ex-husband caused us to be late for my own grandmother's funeral. I learned to start telling him things were earlier than they were and we were STILL frequently late, just not by as much time. Obviously, I eventually divorced him for many, many reasons but this was a key factor. I think these types of people only continue to disregard the importance of other people's time because they have people in their life that tolerate it. Bravo to the person who had that special invitation made for the parents. They can continue to remind them that they were, in fact, 45 minutes late to their own child's wedding. Period. 🤨
to be fair, my MIL is always late because she has mobility issues and is horribly slow, BUT -- We've said to her several times "well then you would just have to tell yourself to get ready EARLIER".... It doesn't sink in with those types of people. It never does. It does feel so incredibly disrespectful to those of us who ARE aware of what time it is, what time we need to be somewhere, and how long it will take to get there. I just don't get it. "What is the reason why you are always late?" -- "I need a lot of time to get ready!" "So get ready EARLIER." "What is the reason why you are always late?" -- "There's always so much traffic!" "So leave EARLIER." "What is the reason why you are always late?" -- "It's always so hard to get the kids ready and out the door!" "So get the kids ready EARLIER." *Never. Sinks. In.*
I think there should be more pressure on brides to NOT have being a bridesmaid cost thousands of dollars. The expectations these days are often ridiculous. It’s one thing for a bride to spend $800+ for a dress she’ll wear for a few hours, but a bridesmaid shouldn’t. And all the extra obligations that add up are not necessary. Shower, bachelorette party, nails/makeup - there are ways to do that on a budget so the bridesmaids can actually enjoy supporting and celebrating with the bride instead of it being a burden that can easily turn into resentment. I tried to make it so my bridesmaids didn’t go broke, and we still had a great time and looked great.
Yeah, I'm getting married next year and couldn't agree with this more. I can't afford to pay for my girls' dresses and didn't want them spending an arm and a leg, so they're ordering online. 🤷♀️
When a dear friend of mine was getting married, she picked out our outfits from a catalog (we each ordered and paid for our own), citing that she wanted us to have something that we could still wear on other occasions. We all went shopping for shoes together, and I got an additional pair of flat sandals to wear after the ceremony. We also had a fun evening together where we made our bouquets out of silk flowers and used some more of the flowers to decorate our hats. Ahh, times were so much simpler then...
I think every bride decides according to their circles, like how much money people have or earn, also some people have money but they are more practical and modest, while others have no money and just want to feel grandiose for those occasions, they have right to live their fantasy of being rich on that day and if their friends also want to play a part on their delusion of being very well off, then why not?? If you have a back bone and you have a friend who has no money to pay for your bridesmaids dress, then say no, I am sorry, I have to pay this or that debt and that’s it. If your friend has money and wants you to use your money, then do they really have money??? Bc having money means you can pay for their bridesmaids dresses or at least do 50/50 or pay for their makeup, hair and accessories. I was supposed to have only 3 bridesmaids, one was out, bc of drama from her family, it was niece of my, my brother tried to sabotage my wedding, it did no happen, so only my niece was out and his entire family. So, I paid for the dresses and shoes and accessories, hair and make up was up to them. But since we were in a very conservative church, make up was almost non existence, so it was no big expense or deal. When I hear all this dramas, I am so glad I was so into modest and simple stuff on those days, bc I can’t imagine how bombastic it would have affected me one of my bridesmaids being out, but since I was more focus on my own dress and stuff, I was like, uff, at least I don’t have to deal with the whole family at the reception, who knows what drama they would have cause there, I lost some money on the dress and shoes, which later I donated, but better so, I spared money on a place at the super intimate and elegant venue for a table for that whole family, who was close family in theory, but who never acted as family, more as envious enemy, so, it was better so. You just need a strong backbone, that’s it. After my wedding lots of girls asked me about my wedding dress, aven years after, they all wanted to get it from the same place, but oops, could not, bc I imported my dress, which I bought on discount, made some adjustments at a designers place, bc the material and the bedding was exquisite and I looked gorgeous in that wedding dress, I never even wanted to look that gorgeous, but I did, wow. So, this is important, wether you are a bridesmade or the bride, just keep your peace and focus on yourself, follow the etiquette rules, respect the event and voila look gorgeous, bc you are not having any of the cheap drama others want you to have, so you can look AMAZING😊😊😊
I love the IT Crowd clip. Please never stop using it. Also the bridesmaid wanting her to pay for the black dress after the bride had already paid for the actual green dress…WTF?!?! 😂😂😂😂 No, girl.
@@JankoWalski-hz3lu for sure. The bride wasted the money on a dress for that entitled bridesmaid. So many people have to buy their own dresses, shoes, jewelry, along with paying for hair and makeup to be in the wedding party. I wouldn’t care what the dress looked like if I wasn’t going to have to pay for it.
Is it a black cocktail dress she claims she'll never be able to use again? Black gown? She wanted and excuse to buy a new black dress, and tried to get the bride to pay for it. I don't get the other folks taking her side. Nope, the bridesmaidzilla was in the wrong.
I actually didn’t have a wedding party for this very reason. I told my maid of honor she was the maid of honor but she could wear whatever she wanted-no specific color or anything. I even told my family they could wear whatever they wanted-I didn’t care about the color. It made it so much easier! Everyone felt comfortable and relaxed.
It's what we usually do in Germany (unless people are very American inspired). Usually no bridesmaids, so no sets of coordinated dresses just for one occasion. Usually, for the bride, there's just a maid of honour (both MOH and best man are called wedding witnesses) who may or may not wear a dress that the bride has agreed on, but usually it's of own choosing. If there's little flower girls or boys I think there's more planning going into their costume, but usually guests pick their own dresses. Which means they can use them afterwards, or even previously. I have heard of much more strict and complicated weddings with bridesmaids, but again, they're more American inspired, it's not our own tradition. Hearing about all these wedding dramas is so odd when many of the conflicts would not be an issue over here. 😆
I think the mom SHOULD know that the family had to print a special invitation for her because she's always late to everything. I'm super glad she found out. She can be mad at them ALL SHE WANTS for "embarrassing her" but it is absolutely nobody's fault, but HERS!! The ENTIRE family, and I'm assuming, her friends, know that she is HABITUALLY LATE. She was 45 minutes late to the wedding but showed up "on time" because of the "special invitation" which ABSOLUTELY PROVES that it was NECESSARY. If mom doesn't want to be "embarrassed," maybe she should try SHOWING UP ON TIME for once. When people are late, it says to me, "You're not important enough for me to expend the energy to be on time for." I completely understand special circumstances, but people who are HABITUALLY LATE are the RUDEST!
I fully agree. My mother is like this and always has been I was always late for school because of her and after school activities too. She'd also complain about having to go to these things like my plays and concerts etc instead of her just being in front of the TV. It really got to me and hurt my feelings deeply and eventually I just quit doing the stuff I loved altogether because I felt like such a burden. I have a son now and if she ever pulls stuff like this in the future I will NOT hesitate to go off on her.
I am often late: to work, to training, to apointments... If someone had done the "special invitation" for me I had thanked her: it is a thoughtfull lifehack. And no: you are important to us. Our brain are just wired differently.
@rebny7801 What? Your brain is wired in a way that you can't just look at a clock an hour before you have to be somewhere and start getting ready to leave? Absolutely not. I am outright refusing this new "time disability". It's called lazy and it is absolutely 100% disrespectful to the other people who showed up on time. If you can get there late, then you should start getting ready and leave earlier. It's not because your just too stupid to know how to do it....unless you want the argument of being too stupid to watch a clock....
Agree! It's totally inconsiderate & preventable! I have an aunt who is always late, too. She knows it & laughs about it, but she doesn't do anything about it because her family has always allowed her to get away with it instead of leaving her! I REFUSE to be late anywhere if I can help it. I have been working for over 40 years & have been late for work maybe eight times total in all those years -- only because of unforeseen circumstances (like an auto accident, flat tire, major accident which blocked all lanes of travel for over two hours, etc.)
When I got married, I thought about the cost of the dresses. My bridesmaids' dresses cost $109 each (they were really simple) & the girls paid for them. Since the dresses were long, I just asked them to wear black pumps with them (although the dresses were amethyst colored) because most women I know own at least a pair of black pumps (or black flats). As a "thank you" gift, I gifted each girl a strand of pearls with matching earrings which I asked them to wear for my ceremony so that their jewelry matched.
The mention of quinceañera makes so much sense because a lot of Latinas are guilty of being late to anything except being 6 hours early to catch a flight to the airport. 🤣
If the Bride in story one should compensate the girl for the dress she couldn't wear, then the girl should compensate the Bride for the dress she bought for her that she didn't wear.
When I was growing up I was told this story about my grandfather. My mother was also horrible at being on time for anything and apparently so was my grandmother. So one time when they had to be somewhere in the morning my grandfather went all around the house and changed the times on every clock to appear an hour later to trick everyone. Being this was a time far before cell phones it was actually quite effective. Of course no one got really angry because that shit is ridiculous. 😂
My father did the same thing to my mother when going to a weddiing. Everyone but her laughed. She was furious. She had no right to be.. She was late to everything. My father finally did something about it, but just that one time. I was exasperated wiith both of them.
I am one of those people who are almost always late. I am nervous and stressed every time I am, however, I very often still cannot help this from happening. My husband now tells me different hours of family events (if they were communicated to him by the family), and while I do suspect he is telling me the wrong hour, I am also always, like, what if this is the correct hour indeed? So, I am rushing to be on time for that hour, then, of course, more often than not I am late, but I am always happy to find out that I am actually early and did not make anyone wait - such a relief. :)
Listen, the bride and groom get to decide on what their bridesmaids and best men wear because it’s their wedding and they paid for it! If you’re in the wedding party, you should be thankful that they even picked you because it’s a very prestigious honor. I get it if you don’t like the attire that they picked out but remember, it’s their wedding day and you only have to wear it for one day. JUST DEAL DEAL WITH IT!
Its 1 day, and if youre allowed to change than its just a couple hours. Suck it up. Ive disliked many of my bridesmaids dresses since Im so pale, but it ain't about me.
110%! I'm going to be in my best friend's bridal party in a few months, and I will be a pale, curvy goth in a massive frou-frou pink dress. I'm going to be the lone meringue in a bridal party otherwise full of little pixies, but I'm happy to be that meringue for my bestie. 😆
yes BUT they still have to be courteous (as in if u pick an $800 bridesmaid dress, doesn't mean u can force everyone to buy it, pick a more reasonable pricepoint). Different story if you buy the dresses for your party which is incredibly nice.
Yea and the bride even said it was fine for her to change for the reception so there literally shouldn't even be an issue here. Bride seemed nice so she should just wear the dress for the few hours in question.
My father always used to be late. It caused a lot of problems for him. Sometimes we'd change a time so he'd be on time. He'd laugh at it. Even though he was a little embarrassed. It was him laughing with us, laughing at himself. After years and years, he really did start being on time, and we all appreciated his effort.
Mom be upset because SHE finally got it, how disruptive and inconsiderate her late arrivals were. When she realized the lengths the OP went to in order to get her to the wedding in time, she was probably embarrassed, yes, but also might've had a memory flashback to all the things she missed because she doesn't put her family first. She should be ashamed. If you're not early, you're late.
maybe the mom is neurodivergent. Autism and ADHD for example might make it harder to judge the time needed to get ready. But honestly, she still has no right to be tricked onto being on time. My mom is also always late and my family gives her earlier times a lot. we just laugh it off. Its never for important, time sensitive matters though. More like birthday parties of cousins where the people can just start eating without us
@@naomif9964from someone with a diagnosis for both of those, its about priority. If I actually care about the thing i need to remember, I'll remember. Yeah some small things escape me but, big life events, can you not get there on time for those ??? Hell, i overplan like weeks ahead for big events so i know i can do the stuff i need to do. Ik others may be different but even my other friends with adhd remember if something important,,
@@browhut2891 Same here, though only ADHD. I set myself a ton of alarms, even if I'm SURE I got it. Also, why doesn't the dad help her get a move on? That's pretty weird unless he straight up doesn't care.
I've actually used a variation of the "tell them a different time so they're on time" trick before. My dad always gets on my siblings, mom, and I if we ever make him late for anything, but then he's always the last one in the car and is actually the one who makes us late. It's obnoxious. When he and my mom came to visit my husband and I last summer I knew this was going to be an issue and I didn't want to be late to where we needed to be. So.... I told him that it took 20 minutes longer to get to our destination than I knew it actually would. As a result we managed to pull out of the driveway right on time so we'd be a little early to our destination. A couple notes: my husband was totally in on it and very supportive of my scheme. My mom had no idea (how could she, she'd never been to the city where we lived and we didn't tell her). Dad didn't find out either, unless he happened to time the drive, but I doubt it. We arrived to our destination perfectly on time and I'm still really proud of myself :)
My SIL chose bright pale yellow as the dress color for the bridesmaids at her wedding since yellow is her favorite color. I am not a big fan of yellow because I find most yellow clothes to be tacky. But you know what I did for my SIL on her wedding day? I STFU and put my own feelings aside for one day. I've never worn the dress again and you likely couldn't pay me to do so, but it was fine for that one day that was not even remotely about me. It also made for a super funny picture because the groomsman I was walking with was like a foot taller than me and bulky in comparison to my short and skinny frame. All in all, dress color is not a hill people should die on unless the bride is genuinely being malicious with her choices.
I was in a wedding years ago as a bridesmaid & the dresses were bright pink. I HATE pink! 🤮 But because the bride was my friend & it wasn't my wedding, I didn't utter a peep & wore the hideous thing. That dress went into the garbage as soon as I got home, so I never had to see it again. 😂
I've been a bridesmaid twice and both times the color an style of the dress was not something I was too into. Both weddings were my sisters. The first one was a dark taupe color no sleeves no straps. The second was a spaghetti strap, light green dress. I'm rather large on top so strapless and tiny straps not my fave. However, not my wedding so not my choice. Luckily, my sister helped me find a nice strapless bra that made both dresses comfortable for me. Brides can accommodate to a certain point of course but in the end it is their day, they get to make those final calls. The audacity of some of the bridesmaids who feel like the bride has to fully bow to their wishes boggles my mind. I like the analogy that your wearing a costume for a part your playing. Wear it or don't be part of the play.
I've had a friend like that and i started pushing her invite times earlier and earlier. Got up to about 30 mins earlier time messaging 😂 Later she started getting late AGAIN despite my efforts. I just told her I'd leave if she wasn't there. Following through with this didn't change her behavior, but it improved my stress levels immensely!!
Update for brother's wedding: Update! So unfortunately since reddit is awful at keeping secrets, Becky saw the post on TikTok so she obviously let the cat out of the bag. My whole family is split on what I should do, but after a heated argument it was mutually agreed that I will not be attending the wedding. My brother and FSIL cannot seem to comprehend that this is not about the dress but how they treated me. For those wondering what our parents have to say, our mother says "if you're gunna be an asshole don't be upset when someone's an asshole back" my dad says "..." Because he's long dead. My brother & FSIL thinks I am the asshole but by the way my mom paid for the hotel for my trip, I think it is safe to assume whose side she's low key on. I appreciate all the love and support I got, I will have an amazing time in Maimi and won't feel the slightest bit guilty thanks to the overwhelmingly positive response I got on here. Thanks you all! **Edit: Guys this is not my story I just copy and pasted from Reddit! :)**
It’s hard being the bigger person, but I would send a card and a small gift if you can afford it. It will show class. Lead with love, even when people hurt you. You will have a whole future together in some way possibly. Hopefully time will repair things too. (I’m only saying this because my whole family had crossed over and once they are gone, that’s it, no more chances and no more good memories to make.) I 100% am on board with the vacation and living your best life! Cheers 🥂 🥳🙌🏼
I hope you have a great time!! I hate those kinds of people who treat you like crap & then get furious when you just aren't going to put up with it. It's bad enough you were abruptly ditched, then expected to pay for your replacement's gown, etc. No one has the right to treat someone that way. Your brother should have stood up for you & because he didn't, he's just as bad as his future wife. Good for you for not letting anyone walk all over you!! ☀️🌴
Exactly and well said. At least now you know where you stand. I am happy you are taking care of yourself. Because you are not allowing anyone to walk allover you even in the name of "family " it won't stop there once it starts. Wait until they have kids. 😆 ✌
That last one he was nta. My nana is always late and sometimes we tell her an earlier time just to make sure she's on time. She knows she's late to things and she laughs when she finds out we told her to get there at an earlier time.
Color fanatic artist here. First of all, Charlotte looks absolutely gorgeous in Forest Green! It really compliments your hair color! And secondly and most importantly, Forest Green is a beautiful color (totally not biases. Maybe a little), and if the bridesmaid had a problem with it she could have either dropped out, pick a different dress, that was obviously NOT black, that went with the theme or suck it up! NTA, your wedding, your rules! Edit, unless the bridesmaid skin tone is like a neon, bright color then Forest Green would look fine on her. That shade of green has about 1/3 mix of red and blue and of course the rest is green (the "regular" kind of you are looking at a color wheel) you have two primarys and a secondary that uses one of the primarys in Greens, unless she has a skin tone that is not compatible with primary colors, which I personally never seen, reds and blues look amazing on anyone, she is being a jerk.
When you agree to be in the wedding party it's on you to wear what the bride wants and to try and make the day as smooth and memorable (in a good way ) as possible. If you don't want to get on DON'T be in the WP!
I can't imagine being so uncaring that you're that late to EVERY event, if I was the husband I would just leave without her, then at least the kids would have one parent there for them. How could she be so frantic thinking she was going to be late to the wedding but not try harder to be there on time?
I would definitely agree that Miss Charlotte looks phenomenal in forest green! Maybe that bridesmaid should have dyed her hair red to complement the color of the dress?
My parents did this for their parents once when they were newer in their relationship. Event was at 1pm. Dad told his parents 2pm, because they always showed up early and then got impatient waiting. Mom told her parents noon because they were always late. Everyone showed up at 1pm. they sat down and Mom and Dad explained what they did. Everyone laughed and was like "You, you got us." Mom's parents tried harder to be on time (and for the most part got way better at it). Dad's parents still showed up early to places, but not as early and were more gracious about waiting for everyone else. It is about understanding what your actions do to everyone else's schedule...and having a good sense of humor when you are called out.
Definitely not the ahole to tell your parents a different time. My parents are always late. Last Friday my parents offered to take me to a job drug test. I got up early to get it done and we had the rest of the day. I told them both in front of my bf 9am. I waited until 9:15 before I left for my 9:40 appointment. My parents call me at 9:30 asking where I was. This isn't the first time they've done this. One time before they asked my bf to replace their headlights. For 2 hours we waited. They got ice cream and were sitting at the lake. It's so rude. It's saying your time is more important and I should just wait and wait. I hate it.
(Wedding relevance after context) I'm time blind, as is most of my family, but I've developed ways to compensate (or overcompensate, lol). Our family events are generally planned with wiggle room for "late" arrivals. That being said, out of all of the sibling weddings I've only been late to one of them - in an unfamiliar town that turned out to be having a parade that day and half of the streets were closed. I pulled into the parking lot just as my cousins were helping my grandmother out of the car. We were maybe 15 minutes late. We missed the entire ceremony. That's the only sibling that has gotten a divorce. I promised her that I won't be late to the next wedding lol.
I was married once before. My mom wanted to go shopping last minute-- there was time BUT not much and she wanted one thing: boots as we were in Texas. And I tried everything to get her to reconsider but she was adamant since we all were catching flights the next morning. I thought like a guy-- go in, find boots, buy boots, leave. Noooooooo! "Can we please speed this up? We neednto be therenin an hour... in 30 minutes.... Mom? Please." Nope. We were an hour late to our OWN wedding because of this. I was so embarrassed, felt horrible, was quietly apologizing to everyone who had waited. Most were chill as hell about it-- but I see being late as rude AF. Especially for our own wedding.
When my husband and I first started dating, he was one of those who was late to everything. He gets it from his family. They will all probably be late to their own funerals. Anyway, I believe in "picking your battles" by letting little things go, but being on time is very important to me, and this was a battle I was going to fight. It took a couple years, and me leaving without him, while he was still getting ready, in order to be on time and let him drive himself, but I am happy to say that we are both on time for everything now. I WON the battle. His family is still late to everything, but that's not my problem.
My friend won a similar battle over dirty laundry on the floor by not washing anything that wasn't in the hamper. She would just reply "oh I didn't know you wanted me to wash that. It wasn't in the laundry hamper." Very quickly the laundry started going where it should.
I’m in my mid twenties and have terrible time management. But I learned early on to voluntarily calculate for extra time. If the group gets together somewhere at 12:30, I math out my time to be there by 12:20 or earlier I generally make it on time and all goes well Punctuality is important in this world, there’s no way around it if you want to be part of it 🤷♂️
My family was late to our wedding too. My sister told them, they have to be at the ceremony at 1.30pm, (it startet at 2.30pm) an they where 40 minutes late! A was so pissed, everybody waited for them. The room for the ceremony was really hot that day, cause they forgot to close the windows. After that my mom told me, that my father hat bloodsugar problem...that was the reason, why they where so late. But till today, i dont know if it really was because of that or not...but we been really lucky, cause if an another ceremony would be after us, we couldnt wait for them. I was just so happy to have my sister by my side the whole time..
I agree. Suck it up & wear the dress. I love forest green, although I'm trying to picture forest green dresses next to a black dress & I'm not sure how that would look. Nevertheless, I would wear whatever the bride wanted.
Forest Green are also a great little football team from here in England!!! And forest Green is a nicer colour than say kermit the frog Green or goose sh1t Green!!!
Forest green is a BEAUTIFUL shade of green! Granted, in my opinion gold for the jewelry is not a WINTER color, silver is more winter. (unless it was WHITE gold?) To me winter themed colors would be blues, greys, and MAYBE desaturated grey-purples. But Forest green can certainly work with a winter theme, like a pine tree forest in the snow.
The funniest thing about that last story for me is that my dad is also that kind of chronically late. He's just got a bad case of time blindness (that he also unfortunately passed on to me). When my parents got married, my mom told my dad that the ceremony was two hours before it was meant to be knowing both that he would be late, and that in freaking out about being late, he probably wouldn't give himself enough time to prepare/feel ready beforehand. As it worked out, he was just over an hour late, and then had plenty of time to make sure he felt ready and put together. He wasn't offended and didn't feel patronized - it was the start of a lifelong marriage that involves my parents understanding and accommodating each other's needs and shortcomings. She wasn't punishing him or trying to make him out to be immature or untrustworthy. Just knew that moving that time for him would give him enough time to be late and gather himself after being late. I see how it can be a little embarrassing, especially if everyone but you knows, but ultimately it comes from a place of love - and like you said - caring that they're there on time! He wanted his Mom to be part of things, and he knew she'd be upset if she missed the ceremony or her part in it.
Re the sister who got kicked out of the older brother's wedding party: probably missing context but it seemed like he was on board with the idea of her giving the dress to the new girl. Certainly didn't seem like he stuck up for her. So in regards to "punishing" him, it's not really punishment. Even if it is, sounds to me like he does deserve it. She just didn't want to go to an event she doesn't feel wanted at.
My sister LOVES yellow daisies and roses. She had a yellow and white wedding. She chose yellow for her bridesmaid dresses. My two sisters and I are all natural blondes. ( yellow looks absolutely terrible on us-legit). My other sister and I reminded her of this, but we could see it was upsetting our sister b/c she had her heart set on yellow dresses. So that’s what we went with. (It looked terrible on me, as added to the color, I was also about eight months pregnant. )- and the dress shop totally screwed up my dress which I had paid a LOT of money to have altered to my growing size- and they epically failed. So I didn’t feel like I looked good, or did I actually feel good b/c of my pregnancy. To top it off I was also my sisters wedding planner. So I was stressed. It was all a lot, but it’s what my sister wanted, so our other sister and I sucked it up and wore the yellow dresses. In the end the full length pics were minimal and the photographer who was a family friend did us a favor and focused on close up shots. The group photos- she had me stand behind people (as she knew I didn’t like how I looked)- so you could see my face and my bouquet and a hint of my legs, but that was it. So it all worked out, but yeah. If you love someone, you go with what they want for their wedding. It’s their day, not yours. ❤
There are several people in my life who are getting "special" invitations to my wedding. That or getting tackled for trying to walk in while I'm walking down the aisle having my moment. Also locking the doors when the ceremony starts.
Whenever I had something people needed to show up on time for I would lock the door 20 mins after the start so that late arrivals had to knock and interrupt and then apologize for being late NO SNEAKING IN!
First story, when she asked if she could wear black too after already expressing her distaste for the bride's colour choice AND suggesting others, I'd stop her and say if she was going to be a problem, she could be a guest instead of a bridesmaid. Nip that shit in the bud!
When my cousin was having his bar mitzvah we knew my aunt would be late (this was in the 90s) so we set all the clocks back in her house 2 hrs and she was still late!!!😅
As a chronically late person (never to huge important events, but on a day-to-day basis), I would be so happy if someone tricked me into being on time. My clocks are set 15 minutes fast and I still have trouble. If my family helped me arrive on time by lying to me I would be grateful and touched, and also find it hilarious. ... I may ask my family to start doing this for me. But like, only randomly so I can never know when. I'd love for them to help me trick my dumb brain.
This! I have trouble being late (mostly underestimating how long it takes to get somewhere or do something) but for important stuff I tell myself I will leave 30min to 1 hour early "so I can get a milk tea or something on the way" and if I am late I just cut that stop out so I am still on time. I very rarely get that tea but I am usually on time now.
I can’t STAND when people are always late. I don’t understand the lack of time management as a skill as an adult. It just really doesn’t seem that difficult to me. You know when the event starts. You know long it usually takes you to get ready. It’s NOT hard. Just be on time!
Story 1: ITS NOT YOUR WEDDING!!! *Gibbs slap to the back of the head* Story 2: Um… what?! You should go to the wedding, for your brother, but understandable if you choose Miami. Story 3: NTA. You did what you had to do. If she could be on time, she wouldn’t be embarrassed! ❤thanks Charlotte for always being a bright spot in my day! I hope you get the rest and fulfillment you need too bestie!
Can relate. My mother is late to EVERYTHING. The best example was when we were so late to my brother’s wedding we followed the bride down the aisle. Missing pictures. I tell her the wrong time for everything and she’s still late every time.
People who are habitually late have no respect for others, they think themselves more important than others. I had a sister in law that was always late for everything and I would always tell her the time was an hour earlier. When she caught on we just started without her which upset her. If we had to travel for youth activities I left without her which made me the bad one. I’m not so easily offended and didn’t care, she responded by not taking part unless it was something important to her than she would arrange everything. On one event she arranged we were all waiting on her, she called a couple of times to let us know she was “almost” their. When it was 30 minutes past our scheduled departure time, I convinced everyone to leave without her. She wasn’t happy but she still didn’t learn her lesson, to bad so dad.
@@ndawn90 Sounds like a "them" problem to work out with a therapist. I'm still not putting my life on hold for it, I'll give 15 minutes grace and then I'm out. Aint nobody got time for that.
@@ndawn90, Those who are late due to conditions of their mind/body would be thankful for others who are making sure they aren't late to important events. Those who throw a fit at those who are courteous enough to make sure they are on time _are_ the narcissists.
@@aralornwolf3140 That's true - I am one of those people who are chronically late. Not always, but very often, and I am so stressed every time about it thinking about how people who arrived on time are waiting for me. @ndawn90 is right, I am super frustrated and upset about it every time. If anyone told me the "wrong" time to make sure I wasn't late to an important event, I'd be so grateful to them if I found out! Maybe embarrassed a bit, but still grateful.
@@aralornwolf3140 While I agree normally with those distinctions I'm not entirely convinced the mom in this case was mad about the special invitation. It could have just as easily been that she was throwing a fit because it seems that they made her the butt of the joke with the whole family knowing, laughing, and even a bit of mocking her(at lease the cousin seemed to be).
My cousin (who is like a sister to me) was once apart of a wedding where the bridesmaids dresses were a very bright purple. She didn’t like the specific color all that much and thought the very loud purple color(it almost looked like neon purple) didn’t flatter her or the other bridesmaids very well but the bride LOVED the color. So you know what my cousin did? SHE WORE THE DAMN BRIGHT PURPLE DRESS CAUSE THATS WHAT THE BRIDE WANTED!!!
If i ever get married forest green (my favourite colour) gold and cream would be my colour theme. I think its a very flattering cour and suits all skin types and hair colour. That bride is NTA and im surprised the other bridesmaids are not on her side. I'd be questioning my friendships with some of those people.
We had to do this to my sister in law for my cousins wedding. Ceremony started at two we told her it was at 12. That she needed to be ready by 10 because it was an hour drive. We love that girl so much, but she can never be on time for anything. 😂
4:00am in the morning, getting ready for work, love listening to your videos. Usually most of them are a**holes. Never stop your videos Charlotte ❤, Sending love from 🇦🇺
I always tell my chronically late sister wrong times, so she will be on time. The only AH move on the wedded son was telling everyone else. Had they kept it secret from the rest of the family, mom would have never known.
I don't even havw to hear the story of the selfish, always late parents. Even "tricking" my mom, she'd still show up late. SHE thought it was "endearing" 🙄
800 dollars for a bride's maid dress???? I'm from South Africa, and that amount would cover my monthly rent, electricity, fuel, and have more than enough left over for groceries. I could never understand why people spend so much on weddings.
The mom who’s always late needed to find out the length her child went to, to make sure she showed up on time and she should be embarrassed for her inability to arrive on time to such important events and milestones of her family
The story about Kat's black dress reminds me of an AITA story about a bride who ejected a bridesmaid who wanted to wear purple in honor of her dead mother (purple was Mom's favorite color). The bridesmaid was escorted, screaming, out of the wedding before it took place. The bride got a lot of online support for her action and has since then decided to avoid said bridesmaid.
The mom that is ALWAYS LATE is a narcissist. Narcissists love to make people wait for them. But what they LOVE EVEN MORE is ruining special occasions and holidays for other people. THEY were late to HIS retirement party. I bet she is on time when its ALL about her.
Unfortunately, I’m familiar with toxic narcissist behavior and agree with your assessment. Everything is about them and if confronted, DARVO kicks in along with slandering. 🙄
Yep, same with my mom. And that's exactly how it was too; if it was something for someone else, she didn't care whether we were on time or not, but if it was something for HER, than we HAD to be on time or we got screamed at and called names for "making her late." Now I live 5 hours away from her, so if she's late I guess she has a good excuse now lol
OMG! Core memory unlocked! My aunt was THE LATE MOM. She was late to absolutely everything, always, except family functions. My grandma (my aunt's mother) had her figured out and always told her things started an hour earlier than they did, and yes, she was still late. I'm SO glad we're older, because she never figured it out! I have NO idea how one of us kids didn't just spill it out, but it was a wonderful family secret that just rode its way out.
You ALWAYS make me smile, Charlotte!!! I don't think I have missed seeing a single one of your videos. I am SO HAPPY to see you using clips from F.R.I.E.N.D.S lately. What a beautiful way to pay tribute to the late, great Matthew Perry!!! THANK YOU for ALL you do!! xoxo 🥰
To be honest, if the bride PAYS for your bridesmaid/MOH dress and has no problem with what you wear *after* the ceremony and the photos, i would consider the dress as a work uniform lol
Me too. I feel bad for OP for having to deal with a Bridesmaidzilla. (٥↼_↼)
Amen to that!
Exactly! Most of the time bridesmaids have to buy a dress that's ugly and they will never wear again. The fact that this bride paid for the dresses means you do what she wants for three hours and SUCK IT UP! Block Kat's number, she deserves all the stigma!
Exactly!
I didn't have any bridesmaids just a MOH and I bought her a dress that could be worn to multiple occasions. It was my gift to her for being my MOH and I made sure she liked it before I bought it.
So the second story actually has an update, so I’ll just post it here so no one has to go looking for it:
UPDATE! WIBTA if I go on vacation instead of my brothers wedding?
So unfortunately since reddit is awful at keeping secrets, Becky saw the post on TikTok so she obviously let the cat out of the bag. My whole family is split on what I should do, but after a heated argument it was mutually agreed that I will not be attending the wedding. My brother and FSIL cannot seem to comprehend that this is not about the dress but how they treated me. For those wondering what our parents have to say, our mother says "if you're gunna be an asshole don't be upset when someone's an asshole back" my dad says "..." Because he's long dead. My brother & FSIL thinks I am the asshole but by the way my mom paid for the hotel for my trip, I think it is safe to assume whose side she's low key on. I appreciate all the love and support I got, I will have an amazing time in Maimi and won't feel the slightest bit guilty thanks to the overwhelmingly positive response I got on here.
Thanks you all!
Thank you for the update!
@@susanmartin5525 oh you’re welcome! I’d read this story myself sometime before this video came out and knew there was a more satisfying ending that people would like.
Thank you for positing the update! 😃
"My dad says "..." because he's long dead." LMAAAAOO
My dear I sincerely believe your brother will be sadly divorced within 5 to 10 years and paying lots of child support if she gets pregnant because this sounds like someone who's just marrying him for whatever he can offer her at this time This isn't a kind person This isn't the kind of woman he should be with but this is the kind of woman he picked. Probably if your father hadn't been long dead it would be a better situation because it sounds like your mother is a very beautiful woman and your father had very good instincts.
1 point to consider with "your punishing your brother and he hasn't done anything" is HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING. He's letting his entitled fiancée walk all over his sister and expecting everyone else to allow it.
WORD
agreed... how can he accept that she's canceled as a bridesmaid?
Thank you for pointing that out.
I hate it when people cry " I didn't do anything! "
Yeah, sometimes doing nothing is worse than doing something smallish bad.
Braid to be had no problems that she spend 2 years helping, spending and supporting.. but suddenly she wants someone else to be the Braidsmaid. .... not buying it..
and then saying "You should just handover your Dress that You paid for ..." and later willing to give not even half the price for it.
Would not shock me it that was the plan from the beginning.
My thoughts too! He allowed it to happen and he was involved with trying to get her to sell the dress at a loss. That's like a double kick in the pants!
*you're.
what's stupid is forest green is one of those colours that suits EVERY skin tone. Pale skin it makes you look etheral. Dark skin brings out the richness in skin tone like a queen. Mid-Olive skin makes your features pop and you shine like a diamond. It's honestly one of the perfect bridesmaid colours.
So true... From West Africa and I love that color , funny enough after seeing it on a red head with alabaster skin. It's just one of very few colors we can share.
Green is the Mariah Carey of colors
🎯
Meh, I personally think I look hideous in forest green, and I have pale skin (paler than Charlotte in the picture she showed).
It kinda makes me look sickly 😂
Plus it slims you down instead of a light color that makes you look heavy. It honestly is one of the few rare colors because it is the color of the Earth that's not boring like tan brown rust.
my prom dress was forest green, I'm super pale, cool-toned blonde
Mother: "How DARE you not trust me to show up in time for your wedding?"
After she did, in fact, not show up in time for what she thought was the start time for the wedding. Zero self-awareness.
IKR, I can't believe the audacity to be offended when she was 45 minutes late to the wedding.
She has no problem offending everyone else though by being late to their events.
The fact she was 45 minutes late to what she thought was the start time…to her own son’s wedding…why?!? I’m half an hour early to something and I feel late. lol.
I would’ve just not invited her after missing the graduation, the mother not being self aware is concerning, narcissists come in many different forms and aren’t always mean or horrible
Oh no I think she knows, she's just too prideful to show her shame lol
So many people get pissed and say things like "you've embarrassed me!" when it was their own actions and lack of respect for others that caused the embarrassment in the first place. And I THINK THAT'S EMBARRASSING!!
It's not about the dress.
It's the deceit. Self centered and foul actions.
💯 agree
Exactly! In the 1980s, I had a couple of friends we used to go on some wild camping trips with. Jo and Keith were both very funny people and so sweet. They planned THEIR dream wedding, and it was adorable! They bought the clothes for their wedding party and handled all expenses, the guest only had to pay for transportation to VEGAS! (Baby!) but the couple found great deals on flights for them. I was so mad I had to work that day so I missed the wedding of the decade.
The guests were told nothing about the theme or wedding colors, just that each outfit was chosen especially for each guest and would be ready for them when they arrived.
The husband had previously gone to an auction of a costume rental store that went out of business and bought about 20 costumes for cheap. Being the groom he got first choice, so he was a Godzilla groom. Now the bride of course wore a beautiful white dress... over her gorilla costume. I think the best man was the Mad Hatter, but I don't remember the others. It was years later that I finally realized they went for the "Godzilla vs King Kong" wedding theme.
It started out that only the wedding party was going to wear costumes, but when their two families got wind of it, they all decided to join that fun and brought their own.
I've seen the wedding photos and I laughed until I hurt! I wish they'd taken video of when the entire wedding party walked into the courthouse wearing their wedding "finery" to get the wedding licence (no waiting period in Vegas) then walked across the street to the tacky chapel to be married by Elvis.
20 years later, I got married at that same chapel but my husband wouldn't spend the extra 40 bucks to get Elvis to marry us (red flag! I had my heart set on that, my only request). The guy who took our wedding photo was a swinging hep cat who's a dead ringer for Sammy Davis Jr., so at least for that!
Narcissism is rampant, y’all.
and not to mention kind of an attention seeker. Very disrespectful to make someone else's day about yourself.
@@ahoward3503 This. With how she threw a tantrum and told the bride to fuck off it was pretty clear that she knew what she was doing. She couldn't handle not being the center of attention in some way and decided to behave like a toddler.
The fact that the brother was on his awful fiance's side, expecting his sister to give away an 800 dollar dress, is all I need to know about him. So she expected the sister to let someone else wear the dress first, and then she could have it back and keep it? That's gross. Also, for the most part, bridesmaid dresses are not really re-wearable. Double gross. I say go Miami and have a good time where you won't be disrespected by family!
Someone posted an update, she’s going to Miami bc family found out on TikTok.. I guess she chose guilt over resentment.😊
Yeah I’m sorry but Charlottes take is wrong here. She said the bro did nothing wrong but he definitely did
Maybe that was their plan all along as they knew OP would buy the dress? Then kick her out and give it to the other less financially abled bridesmaid.
I am STUNNED that the HORRIBLE "friend" not only PURPOSELY WORE A BLACK DRESS when she was told to wear the forest green dress that the bride PAYED FOR, but she also insisted that the bride OWES HER MONEY for not being able to wear the black dress she SELFISHLY bought herself. And on top of everything, SHE called the bride "selfish and inconsiderate" for not allowing her bridesmaid to wear WHATEVER THE F*** SHE FEELS LIKE WEARING. I am ASTONISHED at how many sh*tty friends these brides have. I would have had absolutely NO PROBLEM kicking her out of my wedding.
She described herself
Paid*
I am a wedding photographer and did a wedding for a friend of mine. She had a black wedding dress and SPECIFICALLY set two rules: no one else wearing black, and NO cell phones during the ceremony. Just before the first look, I saw her future SIL not only hanging out in the area that was restricted to bridal party only (she was trying to get and post shots BEFORE the wedding even started!) but she was also wearing a VERY TACKY black dress that was totally inappropriate for a church wedding. I let the bride and groom know and they gave me permission to proceed with my job as I saw fit. In every group picture, I had the SIL in a middle row so her dress was always covered by the people in the front row, and during the ceremony, every time she STOOD UP or held her phone all the way up to either take pictures or try to live stream the event on Facebook, I conveniently "had to suddenly move to a different angle" to take a new picture. The SIL never caught on but EVERYONE else knew and by the end of the wedding I was a legendary MVP of the day.
She hid the dress in a bag, lied about it when asked beforehand and showed up late in the hope of sneaking past the bride. So yeah, she knew exactly what she was doing and trying to force her way. If she wanted to wear black, then step down as a bridesmaid and be a regular guest, then she can wear whatever she likes
Honestly surprised she even gave her a warning and chance to change. I'd have kicked her out the second I saw her in a black dress after repeatedly telling her not to beforehand and even discussing it barely an hour prior in which she said "this is for after the ceremony"
@@philipandrews9938It doesn't say anything about her hiding it. It says she had "a bag that looked like it had a dress inside".
I was picturing one of those bags that goes on a hanger so it doesn't wrinkle and zips and unzips that you would keep a nice dress or suit in.
My mom and dad got married in December, so my mom chose (guess what?) forest green velvet bridesmaids dresses. They had cap sleeves and empire waists, and all the bridesmaids looked SO pretty in them! Even all these decades later, those dresses are still flattering in the pictures. That girl was crazy.
It's so damn insulting that the 2nd story's bride and groom (the brother) thought it was okay to give the $800 dress to the "new" bridesmaid for free... like wtf?? if they wanted the bridesmaid to wear it, either she pays or they pay it for her. And also what kind of bridesmaid dress cost $800 that will only be used once?? Add to the insult that the sister was being replaced after a year or so of being the bridesmaid.
I can't believe there are bridesmaids dresses that cost $800!! Who in the world would ever have the balls to ask someone, or several people, to spend that much on a one-time dress???
@@lisamelroy2855 exactlyyyy and the fact the bridesmaids have to be the one to pay for it. If it was like the first story of the bride and groom paying it would’ve been better ish coz that’s normal in my culture for the couple to pay for everything wedding related.
Oh, if I was a female, and that happened to me, I'm well off enough that I could afford to be ultra-petty in my revenge. I'd let the replacement wear the damn dress. Then I'd wear that thing to EVERY event SIL was going to be at with me. It doesn't matter if it was a pool party on the 4th of July or Thanksgiving dinner. If I was ever queried on it, I'd say it was an expensive dress and I was making sure I got full value out of it.
I think it's curious that she happens to be the same size, my guess is Becky was gonna be bridesmaid all along but couldn't pony up the cash or time for the initial stuff and this was all planned, sis was just a placeholder. Trifling heifer thought it would fly because "family". Or maybe I'm just jaded.
@@terramarini6880 That's a good possibility - I didn't even think about that!
Our wedding colors were purple and blue. Because most of our wedding party were traveling in- we didn’t want a nightmare of trying to do matching outfits. I can’t imagine doing fittings, etc. and we had an array of body types and races and would never want to force someone into something they didn’t feel comfortable in. So we just gave guidelines:
Women had to wear purple dresses. Any length. Any shade of purple. Just had to be purple. If they wanted accessories they could be any kind and any style- they just had to be silver.
Men had to wear grey or black dress pants, a white dress shirt, and any shade of blue tie.
We gifted everyone their shoes- women wore light purple Vans, men wore Avengers Converse (different characters for each, that they had pre-selected).
It was easy for everyone to buy what they needed and while it didn’t “match” it was all complimentary and everyone looked so good- Individually and in our group shots!
It had the vibe of a bouquet of wildflowers- not matching but beautiful.
At this point in my life, if somebody is going to show up 45 minutes late to something as important as a wedding, I'm not making any special concessions for them like inviting them early. I'm going to start on time and lock them out and they can miss it. So that mother can just be thankful that her son cared enough to make her be on time.
Honestly being chronically late is a real mental problem (I’m a chronic late person myself), but I really really try for special occasions. She should’ve gotten help decades ago to help with her punctuality problems.
Truth is that mother did not want to be on time, it’s her way to make everyone wait for her, she’s sick. People in Latin America come late, but ALL come late, this one here, she’s taking a dump on everyone’s head.
I will never understand bridesmaids who get so fussed about the dress. As someone with a lot of body image issues, I'm not going to stress out a friend, close enough to be a bridesmaid for, on the day of her wedding. The first time I was a bridesmaid, we didn't even go shopping. The bride sent us a link to the dress she wanted us to get, told us the color she wanted, and I bought it without ever having worn something with that shape before, having no clue what I'd look like. The last time I was a bridesmaid, we went shopping, and all of the bridesmaids loved the only dress we tried on that I detested. One of the bride's biggest things with the dress we picked was that she wanted it to be something we could wear again, even if we had to shorten it. I told the bride in the store that I didn't like the dress and that it wasn't something I'd wear in public again, shortened or not (nothing that hadn't been said by at least one bridesmaid with other dresses, everything was civil). But it was the only dress that more than two bridesmaids could agree on, and I could tell she was struggling because she wanted everyone to be happy. So I told her if she liked the dress for her wedding, I'd wear it for her. Her wedding, her call. Nothing would stop me from being there for her on the big day. Sometimes people just need to accept that it's not about them.
The only time I was a bridesmaid, the bride 👰🏻 was actually a fashion designer and she picked the color forest green for all of us, but because of our different bodies, she actually designed our dresses to flatter our unique bodies. The accents were also gold. She paid for everything and was the kindest bride I’ve ever seen especially considering I binge watch all your videos and bridezillas going rogue is my favorite. And yes I think we all wore the dresses again! 3:08
That's awesome! It sounds like those dresses were absolutely beautiful.
That sounds gorgeous! I think the combination of forest green and gold is very elegant and perfect for a Winter wedding.
What a delight for every single one of you!!! It must have felt like a dream to be a part of her wedding!!!! And what a thoughtful, beautiful and caring act upon your friend!! I imagined that you all felt like princesses that day as she treated each of you just as special as the other!!! BRAVA 👏👏👏👏
I've worn the MOH dress I wore to my sister's wedding many times.
That makes sense! I'd understand if the cut of the dress wasn't flattering and the bridesmaid in the story freaked out like that, but forest green is a beautiful colour that flatters every skintone imo
My mom is one of those women who is never on time for things. With her it's not that she is procrastinating, but she is one of those personalities where she CAN'T let undone tasks remain undone. Even if we are running a half hour late for something, she'll still be doing dishes or cleaning the cat litter box or even scrubbing the floor, because in her brain, if she does not do the task right away, then it will never be done later. So I have more than once used the tactic of giving an altered time to get her out the door in a timely fashion.
I’d block the other bridesmaids who think the bride was being an AH too. How in the world could you know the details and not put the blame squarely on the ex-friend? I’d seriously be questioning my relationships with any of these people.
I noticed the bride in that story is young (23 I think). And while anyone can act entitled and childish at any age, the behavior of the friend tracks for someone her age. And if her friends agree with her, it makes sense especially if they’re all still the same level of immaturity. I feel like if the friend group was older and some women were already married, they wouldn’t have agreed with the friend who wore black as much.
Correct!!!
@@melissaherrera94023 is young??? 18 is young, 23 is old, but if she can handle being an adult, she should not marry, bc marriage is no joke, also imagine someone as immature having children, people like that make up are horrible mothers, no matter how old they are, bc 23 is old.
@@inkagarden8939 I said she’s young because a lot of people in their early 20s are still more likely to make mistakes, do reckless things and act irresponsibly. That doesn’t mean it’s right and that they should do it. I think that’s too immature for that age. But at 23, this bridesmaid could probably still grow as a person and realize later on she was acting like an AH along with her friends who supported her. Or that could just be the person she is and she’ll always be that way which is why she has those friends who were on her side 🤷🏽♀️. But I do still think 23 is young, at least still young enough to grow and change.
@@melissaherrera940 Well, I thinl we can always grow and change, but when someone is already a piece of crap at 23, there‘s little chances they will ever grow and change indeed. They might adjust themselves here and there, but crappy behavior is already seen in childhood. It‘s natural to make mistakes, we are all humans, but mistakes is one thing and another is when your true character shows up, for me if she was acting like this at 13, maybe, maybe, with much luck…she might change, but I would say at even 13, she is showing what kind of person she will be and she will be crap. Maybe under 10, or under 5 years old, is this kind of behavior still in time to change??? Character is formed from the womb till 2 or 3 years old, still quite good to influence till age 5. After that, the corner stones of who you are already laid, if you suffer trauma, yes that might change you, but normally trauma does not change things as entitlement, trauma might even deepen the entitlement the person, even in covert ways that will show up later on. It‘s like people in emergency situations taking something important/life rescuing for others to themselves, just in case.
Punctuality means different things in different cultures & countries. I used to go to New Dehli for business twice a year, and it took me a few trips to wrap my head around the fact that when someone said " oh we'll eat in like 10 minutes" "or we'll be there in about a 1/2 hour" that was always closer to an hour or more. The lesson was not for an entire culture to change but for me to chill out & trust things would get done eventually, and no good would come from stressing out about it.
I attended many Indian weddings over the 20 years I traveled there, and even then time was a concept, not a rule. Happiness & enjoying the day was the purpose. Obviously there are things like going to court or classes where time is important. Just gotta know the difference. I began to love my trips there because they were more like a vacation than work, and all the work still got done.
True, but if you are invited to the wedding of a family member, it is safe tovassume that you have a loose idea of what the expectations are...
I'm an Indian. We do have ceremony-coded colours but thats hardly a "rule", especially today. Also, there literally is no rule where in a specific colour is only for the bride. Even so, I've always asked the bride what her saree colour is and what colour would she be okay with me dressing up in. That's just basic courtesy. If my friend said to avoid red, my saree wouldn't even have minute red design on it. I'll run in opposite direction of that shade family altogether (no reds, oranges, or anything in between).
I wonder why anyone would feel like not listening to the person whose day it is. It's literally not that hard!
A person who would deliberately wear the wrong dress against the wishes of the bride is just someone being selfish and entitled. You have empathy and respect for other people, so you take their wishes into consideration.
You are the real MVP!
I think Indian weddings are very beautiful! Especially the clothing. I think what I love most is that it's not just the bride who is dressed like royalty, but the grooms also. The grooms dress like a handsome prince from a fairy tale.
I think we have too many selfish people who forget that it's the couple's day, and if they are true friends, they will follow some simple requests and do their part to make the day special for the couple. As you said, "It's literally not that hard!"
🎯
I had to laugh at the late mother story. I had the opposite problem with my Father-in-law. He was always WAY early to everything. We would often have my in-laws over for Sunday dinners and other events. He would make mom come over at least an hour early if not more. Once I was still in the shower! It took me years to figure out to just tell him that lunch was at 1:00 instead of noon so he’d be right on time! After a while I got up the nerve to tell my sister-in-law what I was up to, and she started doing it too for events at her place. 😇
I come from a Latino family and they are chronically late for everything. I always tell them when to arrive 2 hours earlier than the "real time" so they get there "almost" on time. I find it incredibly disrespectful when people don't show up on time.
Yeah but it's also hard to get somewhere on time as well. What if you have to travel from far away? It's like me and my family when we have to go to my uncle's house for Thanksgiving. We live an hour away from them and we're always late because of my mother and because we live an hour away. It's not like we live only ten minutes and it's no big deal. They get mad at us for being late but if we had a big party, they'd show up late anyway because they'd know how long it takes to get there and stuff. It's ridiculous but that's how my mom's side of the family is. They think they should show up late because we always show up late. It's really annoying, especially since my mom's side of the family complains that WE'RE late but if they ever want to visit us, THEY would be late.
I married into an Hispanic family and the lack of punctuality was infuriating! 😡 It was among the many reasons why it didn’t work out.
@@Supersoccerchicgiving advice front someone that's also bad with times bc adhd
Usually I try to think of how long a drive would be max (like all red lights and some traffic) I would also try to add-on the "how long it takes for me to get ready to leave" part because that can vary
As in, normally a drive would be 30 minutes, but i add how long i think it would take to get through traffic and all red lights and it jumps up to around an hour.
And also, communicate of anything unexpected/more delays pop up. One of my friends are regularly late and im ok with that because she also communicated that she had a job that she got out very late from
@@SupersoccerchicI understand your frustration but I also understand your family’s retaliation. Being late is a huge pet peeve of mine so I would do what I had to do to get the family in the car an hour and a half prior to the start time to account for traffic. If that means fudging on the start time of the event or telling everyone that the car was leaving two hours early (to ensure I had an hour and a half) then so be it. Or take separate cars. If mom doesn’t mind being late then she can be late but I won’t be. 😉
Having said all that, I also understand that moms have a tendency to be late for a myriad of reasons. Usually it’s because they are trying to “herd cats” (I.e. husband and kids), everyone else has to be gotten ready first (or they’d show up in rags), she is worried about a million and two things everyone else is oblivious to, and/or she had to change outfits several times because they just didn’t look right. Or she is selfish and needs the attention. 😉 Either way, I’ve mellowed with age and try not to make it a big deal. If someone is late, they’re late but the event kicked off on time. I’m sorry that your family has chosen to retaliate and complain instead of finding a more peaceful solution but try not to let it upset you. 🫂
@@Supersoccerchic No, they are always late and we all live in the same city. No one is traveling long distances. No excuses for that sort of behavior.
"A 36 year old assistant flower-girl, really?" Has me CRYINGGGGGGGGGGG
The bridesmaid who insisted on wearing black is going to be ONE HELL of a bridezilla if her time ever comes…😬
I would hope karma bites her in the ass too😂
It’s funny cause it’s true. Also that bride seemed so chill about everything for the bridesmaid to act like that. Red flags galore.
@@raenowayIkr! She didn’t even care if she wore it to the reception. The bridesmaids is bat shit cray cray🤣
Love that "if" XD
"No, that's too white, no now its too green. No your hair can not be more than 3.5 inches long and I will measure it to make sure you aren't lying."
Not this bride buying everyone green dresses, and this "friend" brining her own and LYING about it to her face, then gets upset for tricking her last minute and calls her a terrible friend. Bride paid for the maids' dresses, you bought your own to be sneaky, no reimbursement necessary.
Fun fact- we did a similar thing with the time for my wedding. My husband’s parents have no concept of time and we told them to be there an hour earlier than they needed to be for photos and all (photos really were an hour before but we told them to arrive even earlier similar to OP in this video). Well, even with that they showed up just as the wedding was about to start so they missed the family photos. It kinda worked out in the long run that they weren’t in the photos cause that was the last straw for my husband (many other more important issues going on but the fact they were that late to his wedding really set him off) and he hasn’t had a relationship with them since. We’ve been married 10 years.
Kudos to your husband for having a backbone
I have close family friends who are always 15-30 minutes late to things. So I tell them to be there 30 minutes before the actually start time, and they think it's smart. People need to be more self aware
My Neice did this and had us sitting for an hour in a hot church waiting for her arrival, unfortunately my son in law, at the time, had to go and put more money on the car (pay and display) and nearly interrupted her walk down the aisle 😂😂
The story about parents always late- my family ALWAYS lies to me about what time we're supposed to be there because I'm late for everything! It makes me right on time, no hurt feelings here😂
This is why I'm happy with how I'm doing things. Our wedding colors are black and red so I asked all my bridesmaids to wear whatever black dress they feel comfortable in. I can't afford to buy everyone a dress but I also don't want to make everyone buy something specific and then waste money on something they won't wear again. We're all broke out here so trying to keep things simple.
You sound like a very kind, thoughtful bride. Congratulations on your wedding!
A young friend of mine did the same thing: all attendants could wear a black dress of their choosing. It was fine other than one gal showed up in a patent leather-like mini dress and the lighting in the photos made her stick out like a sore thumb.
Those are my favorite weddings! So much more relaxed.
My friend's son had a barn wedding with straw bails and blue jeans. They have money but both parties wanted simple. It was beautiful, and relaxed.
Forest green is so pretty, I love deep greens, Phthalo green is my favorite. And also, the mom in the last story sounds a lot like my grandma, when it's like 30 minutes before she has to go somewhere she will take a shower. Like grandma, 30 minutes before an event is when you should be walking out of the door 😂
I was once married to someone who was habitually late for everything. I'm more like Charlotte where I actually have anxiety about being punctual and can't stand it when people repeatedly arrive late for important things. My ex-husband caused us to be late for my own grandmother's funeral. I learned to start telling him things were earlier than they were and we were STILL frequently late, just not by as much time. Obviously, I eventually divorced him for many, many reasons but this was a key factor. I think these types of people only continue to disregard the importance of other people's time because they have people in their life that tolerate it. Bravo to the person who had that special invitation made for the parents. They can continue to remind them that they were, in fact, 45 minutes late to their own child's wedding. Period. 🤨
to be fair, my MIL is always late because she has mobility issues and is horribly slow, BUT -- We've said to her several times "well then you would just have to tell yourself to get ready EARLIER".... It doesn't sink in with those types of people. It never does. It does feel so incredibly disrespectful to those of us who ARE aware of what time it is, what time we need to be somewhere, and how long it will take to get there. I just don't get it.
"What is the reason why you are always late?"
-- "I need a lot of time to get ready!"
"So get ready EARLIER."
"What is the reason why you are always late?"
-- "There's always so much traffic!"
"So leave EARLIER."
"What is the reason why you are always late?"
-- "It's always so hard to get the kids ready and out the door!"
"So get the kids ready EARLIER."
*Never. Sinks. In.*
I think there should be more pressure on brides to NOT have being a bridesmaid cost thousands of dollars. The expectations these days are often ridiculous. It’s one thing for a bride to spend $800+ for a dress she’ll wear for a few hours, but a bridesmaid shouldn’t. And all the extra obligations that add up are not necessary. Shower, bachelorette party, nails/makeup - there are ways to do that on a budget so the bridesmaids can actually enjoy supporting and celebrating with the bride instead of it being a burden that can easily turn into resentment. I tried to make it so my bridesmaids didn’t go broke, and we still had a great time and looked great.
Yeah, I'm getting married next year and couldn't agree with this more. I can't afford to pay for my girls' dresses and didn't want them spending an arm and a leg, so they're ordering online. 🤷♀️
When a dear friend of mine was getting married, she picked out our outfits from a catalog (we each ordered and paid for our own), citing that she wanted us to have something that we could still wear on other occasions. We all went shopping for shoes together, and I got an additional pair of flat sandals to wear after the ceremony. We also had a fun evening together where we made our bouquets out of silk flowers and used some more of the flowers to decorate our hats. Ahh, times were so much simpler then...
I think every bride decides according to their circles, like how much money people have or earn, also some people have money but they are more practical and modest, while others have no money and just want to feel grandiose for those occasions, they have right to live their fantasy of being rich on that day and if their friends also want to play a part on their delusion of being very well off, then why not?? If you have a back bone and you have a friend who has no money to pay for your bridesmaids dress, then say no, I am sorry, I have to pay this or that debt and that’s it. If your friend has money and wants you to use your money, then do they really have money??? Bc having money means you can pay for their bridesmaids dresses or at least do 50/50 or pay for their makeup, hair and accessories. I was supposed to have only 3 bridesmaids, one was out, bc of drama from her family, it was niece of my, my brother tried to sabotage my wedding, it did no happen, so only my niece was out and his entire family. So, I paid for the dresses and shoes and accessories, hair and make up was up to them. But since we were in a very conservative church, make up was almost non existence, so it was no big expense or deal. When I hear all this dramas, I am so glad I was so into modest and simple stuff on those days, bc I can’t imagine how bombastic it would have affected me one of my bridesmaids being out, but since I was more focus on my own dress and stuff, I was like, uff, at least I don’t have to deal with the whole family at the reception, who knows what drama they would have cause there, I lost some money on the dress and shoes, which later I donated, but better so, I spared money on a place at the super intimate and elegant venue for a table for that whole family, who was close family in theory, but who never acted as family, more as envious enemy, so, it was better so. You just need a strong backbone, that’s it. After my wedding lots of girls asked me about my wedding dress, aven years after, they all wanted to get it from the same place, but oops, could not, bc I imported my dress, which I bought on discount, made some adjustments at a designers place, bc the material and the bedding was exquisite and I looked gorgeous in that wedding dress, I never even wanted to look that gorgeous, but I did, wow. So, this is important, wether you are a bridesmade or the bride, just keep your peace and focus on yourself, follow the etiquette rules, respect the event and voila look gorgeous, bc you are not having any of the cheap drama others want you to have, so you can look AMAZING😊😊😊
I love the IT Crowd clip. Please never stop using it.
Also the bridesmaid wanting her to pay for the black dress after the bride had already paid for the actual green dress…WTF?!?! 😂😂😂😂 No, girl.
She should pay the bride for that green dress.
@@JankoWalski-hz3lu for sure. The bride wasted the money on a dress for that entitled bridesmaid. So many people have to buy their own dresses, shoes, jewelry, along with paying for hair and makeup to be in the wedding party. I wouldn’t care what the dress looked like if I wasn’t going to have to pay for it.
Is it a black cocktail dress she claims she'll never be able to use again? Black gown? She wanted and excuse to buy a new black dress, and tried to get the bride to pay for it. I don't get the other folks taking her side. Nope, the bridesmaidzilla was in the wrong.
ANY IT Crowd clip is appropriate in my book, one of the best shows ever.
I actually didn’t have a wedding party for this very reason. I told my maid of honor she was the maid of honor but she could wear whatever she wanted-no specific color or anything. I even told my family they could wear whatever they wanted-I didn’t care about the color. It made it so much easier! Everyone felt comfortable and relaxed.
It's what we usually do in Germany (unless people are very American inspired). Usually no bridesmaids, so no sets of coordinated dresses just for one occasion. Usually, for the bride, there's just a maid of honour (both MOH and best man are called wedding witnesses) who may or may not wear a dress that the bride has agreed on, but usually it's of own choosing. If there's little flower girls or boys I think there's more planning going into their costume, but usually guests pick their own dresses. Which means they can use them afterwards, or even previously. I have heard of much more strict and complicated weddings with bridesmaids, but again, they're more American inspired, it's not our own tradition. Hearing about all these wedding dramas is so odd when many of the conflicts would not be an issue over here. 😆
I think the mom SHOULD know that the family had to print a special invitation for her because she's always late to everything. I'm super glad she found out. She can be mad at them ALL SHE WANTS for "embarrassing her" but it is absolutely nobody's fault, but HERS!! The ENTIRE family, and I'm assuming, her friends, know that she is HABITUALLY LATE. She was 45 minutes late to the wedding but showed up "on time" because of the "special invitation" which ABSOLUTELY PROVES that it was NECESSARY. If mom doesn't want to be "embarrassed," maybe she should try SHOWING UP ON TIME for once. When people are late, it says to me, "You're not important enough for me to expend the energy to be on time for." I completely understand special circumstances, but people who are HABITUALLY LATE are the RUDEST!
I fully agree. My mother is like this and always has been I was always late for school because of her and after school activities too. She'd also complain about having to go to these things like my plays and concerts etc instead of her just being in front of the TV. It really got to me and hurt my feelings deeply and eventually I just quit doing the stuff I loved altogether because I felt like such a burden. I have a son now and if she ever pulls stuff like this in the future I will NOT hesitate to go off on her.
I am often late: to work, to training, to apointments... If someone had done the "special invitation" for me I had thanked her: it is a thoughtfull lifehack. And no: you are important to us. Our brain are just wired differently.
Completely agree.
@rebny7801 What? Your brain is wired in a way that you can't just look at a clock an hour before you have to be somewhere and start getting ready to leave? Absolutely not. I am outright refusing this new "time disability". It's called lazy and it is absolutely 100% disrespectful to the other people who showed up on time. If you can get there late, then you should start getting ready and leave earlier. It's not because your just too stupid to know how to do it....unless you want the argument of being too stupid to watch a clock....
Agree! It's totally inconsiderate & preventable!
I have an aunt who is always late, too. She knows it & laughs about it, but she doesn't do anything about it because her family has always allowed her to get away with it instead of leaving her!
I REFUSE to be late anywhere if I can help it. I have been working for over 40 years & have been late for work maybe eight times total in all those years -- only because of unforeseen circumstances (like an auto accident, flat tire, major accident which blocked all lanes of travel for over two hours, etc.)
When I got married, I thought about the cost of the dresses. My bridesmaids' dresses cost $109 each (they were really simple) & the girls paid for them.
Since the dresses were long, I just asked them to wear black pumps with them (although the dresses were amethyst colored) because most women I know own at least a pair of black pumps (or black flats).
As a "thank you" gift, I gifted each girl a strand of pearls with matching earrings which I asked them to wear for my ceremony so that their jewelry matched.
The mention of quinceañera makes so much sense because a lot of Latinas are guilty of being late to anything except being 6 hours early to catch a flight to the airport. 🤣
As someone with ADHD, i found the last AITH story hilarious and brilliant. I wish everyone did a special invitation for me for each and every event😂
Remembered Charlotte's forest green dress . Charlotte was gorgeous in it . I think she wore it to the TIFF gala .
If the Bride in story one should compensate the girl for the dress she couldn't wear, then the girl should compensate the Bride for the dress she bought for her that she didn't wear.
10:46 - After arriving 45 minutes after her invitation said she should be there, OP's mother had the nerve to get mad at OP for "not trusting her"?!?
When I was growing up I was told this story about my grandfather. My mother was also horrible at being on time for anything and apparently so was my grandmother.
So one time when they had to be somewhere in the morning my grandfather went all around the house and changed the times on every clock to appear an hour later to trick everyone.
Being this was a time far before cell phones it was actually quite effective.
Of course no one got really angry because that shit is ridiculous.
😂
My father did the same thing to my mother when going to a weddiing. Everyone but her laughed. She was furious. She had no right to be.. She was late to everything. My father finally did something about it, but just that one time. I was exasperated wiith both of them.
I am one of those people who are almost always late. I am nervous and stressed every time I am, however, I very often still cannot help this from happening. My husband now tells me different hours of family events (if they were communicated to him by the family), and while I do suspect he is telling me the wrong hour, I am also always, like, what if this is the correct hour indeed? So, I am rushing to be on time for that hour, then, of course, more often than not I am late, but I am always happy to find out that I am actually early and did not make anyone wait - such a relief. :)
I’m sorry but if you agree to being a bridesmaid, you should accept what the bride wants.. that’s the whole point.
Listen, the bride and groom get to decide on what their bridesmaids and best men wear because it’s their wedding and they paid for it! If you’re in the wedding party, you should be thankful that they even picked you because it’s a very prestigious honor. I get it if you don’t like the attire that they picked out but remember, it’s their wedding day and you only have to wear it for one day. JUST DEAL DEAL WITH IT!
Its 1 day, and if youre allowed to change than its just a couple hours. Suck it up. Ive disliked many of my bridesmaids dresses since Im so pale, but it ain't about me.
110%! I'm going to be in my best friend's bridal party in a few months, and I will be a pale, curvy goth in a massive frou-frou pink dress. I'm going to be the lone meringue in a bridal party otherwise full of little pixies, but I'm happy to be that meringue for my bestie. 😆
yes BUT they still have to be courteous (as in if u pick an $800 bridesmaid dress, doesn't mean u can force everyone to buy it, pick a more reasonable pricepoint). Different story if you buy the dresses for your party which is incredibly nice.
@@what_equals_42 you sound like a great friend. Props to you for putting your friend first. I wish I could see the wedding photos 😂
Yea and the bride even said it was fine for her to change for the reception so there literally shouldn't even be an issue here. Bride seemed nice so she should just wear the dress for the few hours in question.
My father always used to be late. It caused a lot of problems for him. Sometimes we'd change a time so he'd be on time. He'd laugh at it. Even though he was a little embarrassed. It was him laughing with us, laughing at himself. After years and years, he really did start being on time, and we all appreciated his effort.
Mom be upset because SHE finally got it, how disruptive and inconsiderate her late arrivals were. When she realized the lengths the OP went to in order to get her to the wedding in time, she was probably embarrassed, yes, but also might've had a memory flashback to all the things she missed because she doesn't put her family first. She should be ashamed. If you're not early, you're late.
I think that mom was always late on purpose. 😂
maybe the mom is neurodivergent. Autism and ADHD for example might make it harder to judge the time needed to get ready. But honestly, she still has no right to be tricked onto being on time. My mom is also always late and my family gives her earlier times a lot. we just laugh it off. Its never for important, time sensitive matters though. More like birthday parties of cousins where the people can just start eating without us
@@naomif9964from someone with a diagnosis for both of those, its about priority. If I actually care about the thing i need to remember, I'll remember. Yeah some small things escape me but, big life events, can you not get there on time for those ??? Hell, i overplan like weeks ahead for big events so i know i can do the stuff i need to do. Ik others may be different but even my other friends with adhd remember if something important,,
@@browhut2891 Same here, though only ADHD. I set myself a ton of alarms, even if I'm SURE I got it. Also, why doesn't the dad help her get a move on? That's pretty weird unless he straight up doesn't care.
@@naomif9964 That is why I gaslight myself into thinking the time I should be there is like an hour or 30 minutes before actual time.
I've actually used a variation of the "tell them a different time so they're on time" trick before. My dad always gets on my siblings, mom, and I if we ever make him late for anything, but then he's always the last one in the car and is actually the one who makes us late. It's obnoxious. When he and my mom came to visit my husband and I last summer I knew this was going to be an issue and I didn't want to be late to where we needed to be. So.... I told him that it took 20 minutes longer to get to our destination than I knew it actually would. As a result we managed to pull out of the driveway right on time so we'd be a little early to our destination. A couple notes: my husband was totally in on it and very supportive of my scheme. My mom had no idea (how could she, she'd never been to the city where we lived and we didn't tell her). Dad didn't find out either, unless he happened to time the drive, but I doubt it. We arrived to our destination perfectly on time and I'm still really proud of myself :)
My SIL chose bright pale yellow as the dress color for the bridesmaids at her wedding since yellow is her favorite color. I am not a big fan of yellow because I find most yellow clothes to be tacky. But you know what I did for my SIL on her wedding day? I STFU and put my own feelings aside for one day. I've never worn the dress again and you likely couldn't pay me to do so, but it was fine for that one day that was not even remotely about me. It also made for a super funny picture because the groomsman I was walking with was like a foot taller than me and bulky in comparison to my short and skinny frame. All in all, dress color is not a hill people should die on unless the bride is genuinely being malicious with her choices.
I was in a wedding years ago as a bridesmaid & the dresses were bright pink. I HATE pink! 🤮 But because the bride was my friend & it wasn't my wedding, I didn't utter a peep & wore the hideous thing.
That dress went into the garbage as soon as I got home, so I never had to see it again. 😂
I've been a bridesmaid twice and both times the color an style of the dress was not something I was too into. Both weddings were my sisters. The first one was a dark taupe color no sleeves no straps. The second was a spaghetti strap, light green dress. I'm rather large on top so strapless and tiny straps not my fave. However, not my wedding so not my choice. Luckily, my sister helped me find a nice strapless bra that made both dresses comfortable for me. Brides can accommodate to a certain point of course but in the end it is their day, they get to make those final calls. The audacity of some of the bridesmaids who feel like the bride has to fully bow to their wishes boggles my mind. I like the analogy that your wearing a costume for a part your playing. Wear it or don't be part of the play.
My daughter recently got married and the bridesmaids wore forest green. They all looked beautiful, no matter their colouring it suited them. X
I've had a friend like that and i started pushing her invite times earlier and earlier. Got up to about 30 mins earlier time messaging 😂
Later she started getting late AGAIN despite my efforts.
I just told her I'd leave if she wasn't there. Following through with this didn't change her behavior, but it improved my stress levels immensely!!
3:48 asking for money you spent is crazyyyyyy 😂
Update for brother's wedding:
Update!
So unfortunately since reddit is awful at keeping secrets, Becky saw the post on TikTok so she obviously let the cat out of the bag. My whole family is split on what I should do, but after a heated argument it was mutually agreed that I will not be attending the wedding. My brother and FSIL cannot seem to comprehend that this is not about the dress but how they treated me. For those wondering what our parents have to say, our mother says "if you're gunna be an asshole don't be upset when someone's an asshole back" my dad says "..." Because he's long dead. My brother & FSIL thinks I am the asshole but by the way my mom paid for the hotel for my trip, I think it is safe to assume whose side she's low key on. I appreciate all the love and support I got, I will have an amazing time in Maimi and won't feel the slightest bit guilty thanks to the overwhelmingly positive response I got on here.
Thanks you all!
**Edit: Guys this is not my story I just copy and pasted from Reddit! :)**
It’s hard being the bigger person, but I would send a card and a small gift if you can afford it. It will show class. Lead with love, even when people hurt you. You will have a whole future together in some way possibly. Hopefully time will repair things too. (I’m only saying this because my whole family had crossed over and once they are gone, that’s it, no more chances and no more good memories to make.) I 100% am on board with the vacation and living your best life! Cheers 🥂 🥳🙌🏼
I hope you have a great time!! I hate those kinds of people who treat you like crap & then get furious when you just aren't going to put up with it. It's bad enough you were abruptly ditched, then expected to pay for your replacement's gown, etc. No one has the right to treat someone that way. Your brother should have stood up for you & because he didn't, he's just as bad as his future wife. Good for you for not letting anyone walk all over you!! ☀️🌴
Thanks for the update
Glad to hear you're going on the trip! This was the opportunity for your brother to support you and he chose poorly (IMO).
Exactly and well said. At least now you know where you stand. I am happy you are taking care of yourself. Because you are not allowing anyone to walk allover you even in the name of "family " it won't stop there once it starts. Wait until they have kids. 😆 ✌
That last one he was nta. My nana is always late and sometimes we tell her an earlier time just to make sure she's on time. She knows she's late to things and she laughs when she finds out we told her to get there at an earlier time.
My sister's bridesmaids' dresses were forest green and they were beautiful.
My bridesmaids wore forest green, that is a color I wanted for years. The dresses were very elegant, the whole this was beautiful
Color fanatic artist here. First of all, Charlotte looks absolutely gorgeous in Forest Green! It really compliments your hair color! And secondly and most importantly, Forest Green is a beautiful color (totally not biases. Maybe a little), and if the bridesmaid had a problem with it she could have either dropped out, pick a different dress, that was obviously NOT black, that went with the theme or suck it up! NTA, your wedding, your rules!
Edit, unless the bridesmaid skin tone is like a neon, bright color then Forest Green would look fine on her. That shade of green has about 1/3 mix of red and blue and of course the rest is green (the "regular" kind of you are looking at a color wheel) you have two primarys and a secondary that uses one of the primarys in Greens, unless she has a skin tone that is not compatible with primary colors, which I personally never seen, reds and blues look amazing on anyone, she is being a jerk.
9:20 "keen-see-yeah-rah" Charlotte 😂
When you agree to be in the wedding party it's on you to wear what the bride wants and to try and make the day as smooth and memorable (in a good way ) as possible. If you don't want to get on DON'T be in the WP!
I can't imagine being so uncaring that you're that late to EVERY event, if I was the husband I would just leave without her, then at least the kids would have one parent there for them. How could she be so frantic thinking she was going to be late to the wedding but not try harder to be there on time?
I would definitely agree that Miss Charlotte looks phenomenal in forest green!
Maybe that bridesmaid should have dyed her hair red to complement the color of the dress?
Or wear a wig :)
My parents did this for their parents once when they were newer in their relationship. Event was at 1pm. Dad told his parents 2pm, because they always showed up early and then got impatient waiting. Mom told her parents noon because they were always late. Everyone showed up at 1pm. they sat down and Mom and Dad explained what they did. Everyone laughed and was like "You, you got us." Mom's parents tried harder to be on time (and for the most part got way better at it). Dad's parents still showed up early to places, but not as early and were more gracious about waiting for everyone else. It is about understanding what your actions do to everyone else's schedule...and having a good sense of humor when you are called out.
That's a wholesome story! Thank you for sharing!
Definitely not the ahole to tell your parents a different time. My parents are always late. Last Friday my parents offered to take me to a job drug test. I got up early to get it done and we had the rest of the day. I told them both in front of my bf 9am. I waited until 9:15 before I left for my 9:40 appointment. My parents call me at 9:30 asking where I was. This isn't the first time they've done this. One time before they asked my bf to replace their headlights. For 2 hours we waited. They got ice cream and were sitting at the lake. It's so rude. It's saying your time is more important and I should just wait and wait. I hate it.
Kat isn't a friend she's selfish, she chose to buy another dress after you had already bought, so her out of pocket expense is on her.
(Wedding relevance after context) I'm time blind, as is most of my family, but I've developed ways to compensate (or overcompensate, lol). Our family events are generally planned with wiggle room for "late" arrivals. That being said, out of all of the sibling weddings I've only been late to one of them - in an unfamiliar town that turned out to be having a parade that day and half of the streets were closed. I pulled into the parking lot just as my cousins were helping my grandmother out of the car. We were maybe 15 minutes late. We missed the entire ceremony. That's the only sibling that has gotten a divorce. I promised her that I won't be late to the next wedding lol.
I was married once before. My mom wanted to go shopping last minute-- there was time BUT not much and she wanted one thing: boots as we were in Texas. And I tried everything to get her to reconsider but she was adamant since we all were catching flights the next morning. I thought like a guy-- go in, find boots, buy boots, leave. Noooooooo! "Can we please speed this up? We neednto be therenin an hour... in 30 minutes.... Mom? Please." Nope. We were an hour late to our OWN wedding because of this. I was so embarrassed, felt horrible, was quietly apologizing to everyone who had waited. Most were chill as hell about it-- but I see being late as rude AF. Especially for our own wedding.
When my husband and I first started dating, he was one of those who was late to everything. He gets it from his family. They will all probably be late to their own funerals. Anyway, I believe in "picking your battles" by letting little things go, but being on time is very important to me, and this was a battle I was going to fight. It took a couple years, and me leaving without him, while he was still getting ready, in order to be on time and let him drive himself, but I am happy to say that we are both on time for everything now. I WON the battle. His family is still late to everything, but that's not my problem.
Awsome!
My friend won a similar battle over dirty laundry on the floor by not washing anything that wasn't in the hamper. She would just reply "oh I didn't know you wanted me to wash that. It wasn't in the laundry hamper." Very quickly the laundry started going where it should.
I’m in my mid twenties and have terrible time management. But I learned early on to voluntarily calculate for extra time.
If the group gets together somewhere at 12:30, I math out my time to be there by 12:20 or earlier
I generally make it on time and all goes well
Punctuality is important in this world, there’s no way around it if you want to be part of it 🤷♂️
I think redhead’s look amazing in Forest Green, mostly because it reminds me of poison ivy
My family was late to our wedding too. My sister told them, they have to be at the ceremony at 1.30pm, (it startet at 2.30pm) an they where 40 minutes late! A was so pissed, everybody waited for them. The room for the ceremony was really hot that day, cause they forgot to close the windows. After that my mom told me, that my father hat bloodsugar problem...that was the reason, why they where so late. But till today, i dont know if it really was because of that or not...but we been really lucky, cause if an another ceremony would be after us, we couldnt wait for them. I was just so happy to have my sister by my side the whole time..
Actually Forest Green is one of the prettier shades of green,she needed to wear the color the bride asked you to wear,it's for one day FFS🙄
And the dragonmaid isn't paying for the dress, so she needs to shut up and wear it
I agree. Suck it up & wear the dress. I love forest green, although I'm trying to picture forest green dresses next to a black dress & I'm not sure how that would look. Nevertheless, I would wear whatever the bride wanted.
She doesnt even need to wear it the entire time 2hrs max and she could've changed in to the balck dress. She was just being entitled
Forest Green are also a great little football team from here in England!!! And forest Green is a nicer colour than say kermit the frog Green or goose sh1t Green!!!
Forest green is a BEAUTIFUL shade of green! Granted, in my opinion gold for the jewelry is not a WINTER color, silver is more winter. (unless it was WHITE gold?) To me winter themed colors would be blues, greys, and MAYBE desaturated grey-purples. But Forest green can certainly work with a winter theme, like a pine tree forest in the snow.
The funniest thing about that last story for me is that my dad is also that kind of chronically late. He's just got a bad case of time blindness (that he also unfortunately passed on to me). When my parents got married, my mom told my dad that the ceremony was two hours before it was meant to be knowing both that he would be late, and that in freaking out about being late, he probably wouldn't give himself enough time to prepare/feel ready beforehand. As it worked out, he was just over an hour late, and then had plenty of time to make sure he felt ready and put together. He wasn't offended and didn't feel patronized - it was the start of a lifelong marriage that involves my parents understanding and accommodating each other's needs and shortcomings. She wasn't punishing him or trying to make him out to be immature or untrustworthy. Just knew that moving that time for him would give him enough time to be late and gather himself after being late. I see how it can be a little embarrassing, especially if everyone but you knows, but ultimately it comes from a place of love - and like you said - caring that they're there on time! He wanted his Mom to be part of things, and he knew she'd be upset if she missed the ceremony or her part in it.
Re the sister who got kicked out of the older brother's wedding party: probably missing context but it seemed like he was on board with the idea of her giving the dress to the new girl. Certainly didn't seem like he stuck up for her. So in regards to "punishing" him, it's not really punishment. Even if it is, sounds to me like he does deserve it. She just didn't want to go to an event she doesn't feel wanted at.
My sister LOVES yellow daisies and roses. She had a yellow and white wedding. She chose yellow for her bridesmaid dresses. My two sisters and I are all natural blondes. ( yellow looks absolutely terrible on us-legit). My other sister and I reminded her of this, but we could see it was upsetting our sister b/c she had her heart set on yellow dresses. So that’s what we went with. (It looked terrible on me, as added to the color, I was also about eight months pregnant. )- and the dress shop totally screwed up my dress which I had paid a LOT of money to have altered to my growing size- and they epically failed. So I didn’t feel like I looked good, or did I actually feel good b/c of my pregnancy. To top it off I was also my sisters wedding planner. So I was stressed. It was all a lot, but it’s what my sister wanted, so our other sister and I sucked it up and wore the yellow dresses. In the end the full length pics were minimal and the photographer who was a family friend did us a favor and focused on close up shots. The group photos- she had me stand behind people (as she knew I didn’t like how I looked)- so you could see my face and my bouquet and a hint of my legs, but that was it. So it all worked out, but yeah. If you love someone, you go with what they want for their wedding. It’s their day, not yours. ❤
There are several people in my life who are getting "special" invitations to my wedding. That or getting tackled for trying to walk in while I'm walking down the aisle having my moment. Also locking the doors when the ceremony starts.
Whenever I had something people needed to show up on time for I would lock the door 20 mins after the start so that late arrivals had to knock and interrupt and then apologize for being late NO SNEAKING IN!
First story, when she asked if she could wear black too after already expressing her distaste for the bride's colour choice AND suggesting others, I'd stop her and say if she was going to be a problem, she could be a guest instead of a bridesmaid. Nip that shit in the bud!
Dogs can be flower girls and ring bearers too, but that’s a different story.
My dog was my MOH, because that is who truly has my back and is my best friend. Also, didn't complain about the attire
it is actually ridiculously impressive that she is able to put out videos EVERY day . love you !!!!
Howling at the way Charlotte says “quinceñera”
When my cousin was having his bar mitzvah we knew my aunt would be late (this was in the 90s) so we set all the clocks back in her house 2 hrs and she was still late!!!😅
As a chronically late person (never to huge important events, but on a day-to-day basis), I would be so happy if someone tricked me into being on time. My clocks are set 15 minutes fast and I still have trouble. If my family helped me arrive on time by lying to me I would be grateful and touched, and also find it hilarious.
... I may ask my family to start doing this for me. But like, only randomly so I can never know when. I'd love for them to help me trick my dumb brain.
This! I have trouble being late (mostly underestimating how long it takes to get somewhere or do something) but for important stuff I tell myself I will leave 30min to 1 hour early "so I can get a milk tea or something on the way" and if I am late I just cut that stop out so I am still on time. I very rarely get that tea but I am usually on time now.
I can’t STAND when people are always late. I don’t understand the lack of time management as a skill as an adult. It just really doesn’t seem that difficult to me. You know when the event starts. You know long it usually takes you to get ready. It’s NOT hard. Just be on time!
Story 1: ITS NOT YOUR WEDDING!!! *Gibbs slap to the back of the head* Story 2: Um… what?! You should go to the wedding, for your brother, but understandable if you choose Miami. Story 3: NTA. You did what you had to do. If she could be on time, she wouldn’t be embarrassed! ❤thanks Charlotte for always being a bright spot in my day! I hope you get the rest and fulfillment you need too bestie!
Can relate. My mother is late to EVERYTHING. The best example was when we were so late to my brother’s wedding we followed the bride down the aisle. Missing pictures. I tell her the wrong time for everything and she’s still late every time.
9:18 😂😂😂 the way Charlotte says quinceañera.
I live for Charlotte reading AITA videos. And when they are wedding based *chef’s kiss*.
Thank you Charlotte you lovely lady!
People who are habitually late have no respect for others, they think themselves more important than others. I had a sister in law that was always late for everything and I would always tell her the time was an hour earlier. When she caught on we just started without her which upset her. If we had to travel for youth activities I left without her which made me the bad one. I’m not so easily offended and didn’t care, she responded by not taking part unless it was something important to her than she would arrange everything. On one event she arranged we were all waiting on her, she called a couple of times to let us know she was “almost” their. When it was 30 minutes past our scheduled departure time, I convinced everyone to leave without her. She wasn’t happy but she still didn’t learn her lesson, to bad so dad.
The word you seek is... selfish
@@ndawn90 Sounds like a "them" problem to work out with a therapist. I'm still not putting my life on hold for it, I'll give 15 minutes grace and then I'm out. Aint nobody got time for that.
@@ndawn90,
Those who are late due to conditions of their mind/body would be thankful for others who are making sure they aren't late to important events. Those who throw a fit at those who are courteous enough to make sure they are on time _are_ the narcissists.
@@aralornwolf3140 That's true - I am one of those people who are chronically late. Not always, but very often, and I am so stressed every time about it thinking about how people who arrived on time are waiting for me. @ndawn90 is right, I am super frustrated and upset about it every time. If anyone told me the "wrong" time to make sure I wasn't late to an important event, I'd be so grateful to them if I found out! Maybe embarrassed a bit, but still grateful.
@@aralornwolf3140 While I agree normally with those distinctions I'm not entirely convinced the mom in this case was mad about the special invitation. It could have just as easily been that she was throwing a fit because it seems that they made her the butt of the joke with the whole family knowing, laughing, and even a bit of mocking her(at lease the cousin seemed to be).
My cousin (who is like a sister to me) was once apart of a wedding where the bridesmaids dresses were a very bright purple. She didn’t like the specific color all that much and thought the very loud purple color(it almost looked like neon purple) didn’t flatter her or the other bridesmaids very well but the bride LOVED the color. So you know what my cousin did? SHE WORE THE DAMN BRIGHT PURPLE DRESS CAUSE THATS WHAT THE BRIDE WANTED!!!
The 84 years part from the Titanic😂 great editing decision. Omg i love it. Was perfect. 😂♥️
If i ever get married forest green (my favourite colour) gold and cream would be my colour theme. I think its a very flattering cour and suits all skin types and hair colour. That bride is NTA and im surprised the other bridesmaids are not on her side. I'd be questioning my friendships with some of those people.
I’m glad that mom found out the truth - she’s late, we all know it. She SHOULD be embarrassed.
We had to do this to my sister in law for my cousins wedding. Ceremony started at two we told her it was at 12. That she needed to be ready by 10 because it was an hour drive. We love that girl so much, but she can never be on time for anything. 😂
4:00am in the morning, getting ready for work, love listening to your videos.
Usually most of them are a**holes.
Never stop your videos Charlotte ❤,
Sending love from 🇦🇺
I always tell my chronically late sister wrong times, so she will be on time. The only AH move on the wedded son was telling everyone else. Had they kept it secret from the rest of the family, mom would have never known.
I don't even havw to hear the story of the selfish, always late parents. Even "tricking" my mom, she'd still show up late. SHE thought it was "endearing" 🙄
800 dollars for a bride's maid dress???? I'm from South Africa, and that amount would cover my monthly rent, electricity, fuel, and have more than enough left over for groceries. I could never understand why people spend so much on weddings.
In some areas of the US, it's the same. No way would I ever agree to that. I don't think I spend that much in two years on clothes.
For real!
The mom who’s always late needed to find out the length her child went to, to make sure she showed up on time and she should be embarrassed for her inability to arrive on time to such important events and milestones of her family
The story about Kat's black dress reminds me of an AITA story about a bride who ejected a bridesmaid who wanted to wear purple in honor of her dead mother (purple was Mom's favorite color). The bridesmaid was escorted, screaming, out of the wedding before it took place. The bride got a lot of online support for her action and has since then decided to avoid said bridesmaid.
The mom that is ALWAYS LATE is a narcissist. Narcissists love to make people wait for them. But what they LOVE EVEN MORE is ruining special occasions and holidays for other people. THEY were late to HIS retirement party. I bet she is on time when its ALL about her.
Unfortunately, I’m familiar with toxic narcissist behavior and agree with your assessment.
Everything is about them and if confronted, DARVO kicks in along with slandering. 🙄
Oh trust me I know all to well. My sister is one
@@NekoKuro-il8rz Yep, my middle sister. 🙄
Yep, same with my mom. And that's exactly how it was too; if it was something for someone else, she didn't care whether we were on time or not, but if it was something for HER, than we HAD to be on time or we got screamed at and called names for "making her late." Now I live 5 hours away from her, so if she's late I guess she has a good excuse now lol
OMG! Core memory unlocked! My aunt was THE LATE MOM. She was late to absolutely everything, always, except family functions. My grandma (my aunt's mother) had her figured out and always told her things started an hour earlier than they did, and yes, she was still late. I'm SO glad we're older, because she never figured it out! I have NO idea how one of us kids didn't just spill it out, but it was a wonderful family secret that just rode its way out.
The girl with the 800 dollar dress, she should go to Miami and take photos of you and your friend in the dress.
You ALWAYS make me smile, Charlotte!!! I don't think I have missed seeing a single one of your videos. I am SO HAPPY to see you using clips from F.R.I.E.N.D.S lately. What a beautiful way to pay tribute to the late, great Matthew Perry!!! THANK YOU for ALL you do!! xoxo 🥰