How To Stop Catastrophizing About The Future
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- Опубліковано 30 чер 2024
- Breaking down a possible future reality in a way that makes it feel manageable is a mainstay of good mental health. Catastrophizing, on the other hand, involves looking only at the the imagined emotional pain of an event in the future.
Catastrophizing has people feeling, but not thinking so much.
So, in this video I share 3 subtle, gentle ways to change your clients’ thinking style so they stop catastrophizing about the future
All notes and references can be found on the original article here:
▶︎www.unk.com/blog/how-to-stop-...
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If you need more help to stop catastrophizing, try this guaranteed 'Stop Negative Thinking' self help audio:
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++About Mark Tyrrell++
Psychology is my passion. I've been a psychotherapist trainer since 1998, specializing in brief, solution focused approaches. I now teach practitioners all over the world via our online courses.
More about me here:
▶︎www.unk.com/blog/about-mark-t...
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Catastrophizing is pretty horrible. For me its the thought of people leaving me or the people I love dying. I have found it helpful to remind myself that I cannot predict the future. Also, during a depressive episode my brain isn't entirely working right and can't be trusted to even imagine the future realistically. I actually say "Stop. Your brain isn't working right." when I catch myself catastrophizing.
I do it a lot cuz my parents have health issues ur thing worked tysm
This is me indeed
@Logan Legend me too on scared of losing my mom because I just lose my dad almost every Christmas I lose someone
yes excatly , i think the same ....
That's exactly what I've been catastrophizing about
*trying to get these bad thoughts out of my head cause it's literally killing me , pray for me , i pray for y'all too i hope y'all find peace and relief in ur life , keep fighting ✊🏽🙏🏾*
Same here right now. I'll pray for you, for all of us. I hope you're doing better. We're definitely not alone and stay strong 💜
Love the phrase... 'these are visitors in the guesthouse' speaking about fear... depression ... anxiety etc. Wow!
Poem by Rumi called 'The Guest House'.
When my ex left me, I was not eating better or thinking about the situation less after 2 weeks!! It was MONTHS before I felt any sense of calmness and YEARS before I felt “better.” Naturally, I believe the longer you’re with someone plays a factor as well as the circumstances in which a relationship has ended. I doubt most people will feel better after 2 weeks.
I don't wanna self diagnose or anything but an hour ago I think I was kind of having an anxiety attack (again I don't wanna sound like I'm self diagnosing and belittling the people who actually go through it). I suppose it was some kind of an attack because it was something so new, so intense. I was shivering so i got into the bed (I'm still there), my hands and throat felt like they were burning, I had muscle twitches and just felt really really really anxious. Then to distract myself I found this video and I've been watching it over and over again. This was really soothing and a lifesaver to be honest. Thank you a lot for this :) To anyone who's going through this or anything that is upsetting, you're definitely NOT alone and I'll be praying for all of us. Everything you feel is valid, totally understandable and I love you. 💜
This is awesome I suffer with depression and anxiety and I let that ruin my relationship I always catastrophized about the negatives of the relationship of the past or the future and not being present in the moment and enjoying myself with my partner and being grateful for having her by my side. She’s given me a second chance and I’m going to change my mindset and be more positive and more understanding and not to fear about the past or future as they are only a figment of our imagination.
Currently going through the end of a 6 year relationship, I can’t imagine my life without her . We’ve shared everything and I still love her tremendously. Found this video, thank you very much for the advice. Somehow, I’ll make it through this, but it’s really painful.
I'm so sorry to hear that, for what it's worth, you are catastrophizing when you think you can't live without her, God forbids if you broke up, you will be fine, it will be painful of course, but it's not as worse as your brain is making you feel it is, you don't and can't know what happens, you can only imagine, so stop yourself from doing that.
And I'm in no way undermining what you had with her, I'm only reminding you that you don't have to think about that situation that way.
I can relate. I went through one recently. you will start getting back to normal in due time. You will come out better version of yourself. Keep busy my brother from another mother. 🙏
Hang in there pal
You will get through this and eventually realise that it was the best thing to grow and get strong. From a survivor. I wish you much strength and send you love Linda
Exactly what's happening to me right now, we were together for the same amount of time as well. This comment gave me solace in at least knowing I'm not alone in this, I knew it already, but still. Hope you are doing well.
You described the problem I've been having for years. I'm a 17 year old high school junior who's parents have been trying to divorce for 4 years. I've never gone to a therapist but I've been struggling with this exact problem. I always avoid doing almost anything because of the fear that people will hate me. This video really helped
My father beat it into me that if I'm not perfect in the present my future will be hell
This video was so helpful!
I’ve suffered with anxiety and depression since I was a child and have been in therapy for several years. I like how you discuss looking at the potential disasters and then strategizing. This brings a feeling of being in control. I’ve suffered with deep abandonment issues from infancy and have always looked for a “parental” figure in my life. With this outlook, I can learn how to be my own inner parent versus for looking for someone else to bring safety. Glad I found you here on UA-cam. You’re brilliant
Good luck man
God is our Father
Thank you so much for your inspiring talk. I suffer from clinical depression and catastrophise about being left alone if my husband were to die as he is not in good health. You have helped me a lot.
The feeling of losing the plot when my anxiety is a constant is unbearable this can cause me to catastrophis about the most extreme and awful situations, 😖 hurts my head and weakens my body , trying to see it for what it is is so difficult when the little brain cell doing it is poisoning the rest, it's been a challenging time though and I'm still here , thanks for vid xx
This is brilliant. Yes.... we seem to fear a specific outcome without really considering what that outcome really looks like or how life will be able to continue despite it. It's also important to separate feared outcomes when catastrophizing to an actual catastrophe because sometimes our minds can't seem to tell the difference between a threat to our life and and the loss of a relationship, embarrassment, car breaking down, losing a job etc. All these things are terrible and easy to fear, but it's too easy to get consumed and frozen by that fear as if we are trying to avoid death or worse. Life will go on. Visualize the outcome, go through it as if it was to happen and often you'll realize you were afraid of something very manageable despite how big it felt. The more you try run away, the bigger it gets.
My anxiety is based on past..miscarriage,job loss,living alone,complete emotional abandoment from family and others,divorce,moving countries every 2 years..have gone through it all,all within 10 years.I really dont have much to lose anymore but at the same time dont have it in me to go through another crisis.Not afraid of dying but anxious about how much more struggle is to be done.Makin friends and exercisin,datin again, marryin again sounds easier ,it isnt in real life 😅
I love the framework of imagining getting through it and surviving and later on thriving. It's the mindset tool that's helped a significant amount with a big fear I have that is inevitable due to death being a component in it.
My personal anxious thought about the future is that by the end of my life I’ll sit back and be unsatisfied and wish I’d done it differently and be regretful. I’m only 20 but I think about this CONSTANTLY and feel pretty constant anxiety because of it.
I find myself thinking about the end of life and the same thing u do all the time and I sadly haven’t found a solution to it yet😞 also aging scares me a lot
@@nathanteso same I’m hoping I can just let things be and enjoy the ride!
I learned to use it for myself. I Think about the end of my life and identify what I would regret not doing, and How I would live life differenetly. This actually gives me a clear sense of what I want and don't want in my life. I hope this might help you and I wish you a meaningful life.
Wow I related to this little comment thread so much 🥺 I’m 22 years old & for the past week + I can’t help but almost be fixated on the fact that we’re all going to die & then I start to think I am not doing enough. I am struggling a lot with trying to find a way to deal with these awful intrusive thoughts :( I appreciate you sharing
@@Sophie-gw9sw I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling! I know that feeling all too well. In this past year though I actually became a Christian and I honestly don’t suffer with this kind of anxiety anymore. It’s so freeing! Hope you feel better soon. Remember, social media makes these things worse!! (Insta mainly)
My goodness I needed to see this video. Intrusive thoughts are horrible!
Indeed. I felt the same.
Thank you! I have a nasty habit of catastrophizing the future, creating my own suffering in most cases as the things I worry about never come to pass. However, many times in my life, my worse case scenario DID happen, therefore I am conditioned to catastrophize. Your tips will be helpful to me! Thanks!
What an absolutely amazing approach! I cannot thank you enough! I have spent days literally watching videos on this topic and yours was the first to hit the points I needed to hear. Anyone who gets to work with you on a personal level is very lucky. I wish more people were aware of the bit about validating the persons present state and that their fear could in some sense be true. I often find myself feeling worse when I share with other and now I understand why. Too bad we dont teach some of these things in basic psych classes in high school... it would be a much better world if we did! Thanks!
I like it that u dun deny things might be tough but help your client realistically and rationally visualise what they have to go through and help them realise they can live through the difficult period, or even thrive.
Thanks mate, you make me feel sane.
Huge weight lighted knowing I’m not the only one that does this
I am a 47-year-old disabled person. Right now I rely on my mom to have to help me do everything. At 68 years old I know she doesn't have a ton of time left. That scares the crap out of me. I mean I can't even get out of bed by myself. And I think about it all the time.
I tend to catastrophize now and then, and this really helped, I share these with my therapist and others taking care of me, and it really helps! I think you're a wonderful guy, and am so glad that I can share these with my caregivers and I'm also am going through EMDR, and thinking about this and practicing what you're saying with my therapist really adds an "extra point" to what we're trying to do to get me better, my therapist subscribed to your channel, and it's nice that she is willing to incorporate what is here into what we're doing. Thank you so much for all of your help! :)
I’ve had so many traumas in my life it’s hard to imagine a better future.
I really appreciate you sharing this knowledge with the world.
Thanks for your help, this is exactly what I do.
Im tired of these catastrophizing videos, always examples like ”what if i lose my job” or ”what if he/she leaves me” ... uhm im sitting here with WAY crazier scenarios (like horrific) and i cant relate at all and I get even more depressed
Same I think of maybe the worst scenarios possible AND CANT STOP
So did I. The concept is still the same.
Same. I catasrophize about crazy things which are very very depressing and these videos don't help at all.
I was wondering if anyone else was thinking that cause most are saying how helpful it was.
Nothing is Always …. 🚩
Another good video. I especially like that you spent the effort to validate the client's feelings all along the way.
I know I need to stop catastrophizing. It's utterly destroyed my life. It's impossible to even exist
Thank you very much, it is truly helpful!
Sometimes the future is a catastrophe. Sometimes there is no hope for anything good.
I understand how you feel, don't look at screens much, that's what I had to do.
Excellent advice and timely for me.
Really good. !! Mark explains in such a clear way, that makes it easier to cope with our issues.
Finally, someone who is honest!! Thank you so much!! This really helped me.
Loved this video. It helped me through a tough moment in my life.
This is the only helpful video I have watched on this subject. I find that simplicity is key in psychology. Thank you!
Yup..This is what I want people to tell to me 😊👍 i will do the same to people who feel bad about their future. Thanks doctor
Ironically, no event is worse than sever anxiety or depression!
Yes are you still there? What can we do?
@@theamalgamatedtheory What can we do? FIGHT!!!
Fabulous. Thanks. So helpful.
Your voice is so soothing and calming. Thanks I feel much better
Excellent video! thank you
A great video Mark, and especially relevant at this Pandemic moment. Thank you for all of your valuable work.
Really helpful. Very thoughtful. Practically applicable. Thank you 🙏
This is broken down and explained in a really clear and helpful way.
I've always feared what would happen if my relationship would ever end. I knew it wouldn't be me who would end it, and that it would be a catastrophe for me. So when the relationship actually ended, all my fears and associated pain came true. And now, almost one year after the event, I still feel pretty much the same. I don't want anyone else, because, to me, that person was the love of my life, and I never go for 'second best'. I rather remain alone and sad.
If you lived a hundred miles away you prob would have never met “the love of your life “ but you would have met another love of your life . You are limiting yourself with this way of thinking and it’s causing unnecessary pain
@@tazpoochie Thanks for your words! I'm still alone, but I find refuge in my hobbies. I'm pretty comfortable this way, actually.
@@Zoydian you will discover a strength you didn’t know you had !. I have been where you are a couple of times ( unbelievably painful and lonely ). Some of us feel deeply unfortunately. Please don’t make the mistake of saying to yourself “ she was the one “ . I wish you all the best my friend . You was probably the better person . Her loss I say !
I love your definition of emotional security
I've come to the conclusion that my mind has a mind of its own & likes to be in control! It goes towards the negative & what if that happens (it's going to be soo bad!) I try & encourage my mind to think about the positives but it's not interested...my mind knows what I'm up to (trying to change course) & won't have any of It! My mind likes to upset me & pops bad memories into my head (which it knows I don't want to think about ever again) so I've decided to let the memory walk through my head to the other side & not get upset about it, meanwhile thinking about something else or just concentrating on what I'm doing at the time😊 it's a work in progress!
Dude you are awesome! Thanks for giving me great advice :)
This was brilliant!!! Thank you for helping me deal with my anxiety.
Good content! Thanks!
This is so calming and useful.
Congratulations for the catastrophizing videos. It has helped me to deal with some ways of thinking. I relate to some of them like: "What happens if I lose my mom ?" She's 80 now. She's my life. What happens if I get an incurable disease ? 😮😮😮
Thanks ❤️ Helping me alot. I've suffered GAD and been off work for a month. Now shy to go back to work. Having low self esteem
Thank you sir for your wise words!!
Thank you for this! I’m a big catastrophizer!
this video is really helpful. thank you❤
I use to have this kind of thinking and I never thought I would get rid of it but I was so wrong. I think just like a "normal" person now.
What did you do cz I'm suffering a lot I spend my whole doing predicting catastrophies cz of a problem I faced 2 years ago I'm living in the past and predicting black future I'm exhausted
Dude I'm not even your client and I feel calm and at ease just listening to you talk about other people's baggage.
Great video, Mark. Thank you for this.
I have being having anxiety about my future in the getting a home and job. Been freaking me out a lot.
same 😩
You are amazing! My boyfriend and work partner died 3 weeks ago and I can not stop catastrophic thinking. I hope it subsides
excellent contribution
Thank you Mark! I love this!!
This helped me so so much....thank you
Thank you very much sir - I've just got a puppy and I have severe tinnitus too. This is going to be such a blessing, and I'm rehearsing for myself how I'll thrive with her. Bless you.
My dad is going through a rather serious blood condition but it is very treatable...but yet I can't help Catastrophising about the worst possible outcome :')
Realistic thinking is what I neeeedd
This is me . I need to take notes on this video!!!
What about reality-based catastrophising? What about people who live with their elderly parents and sooner or later will have to take care of them, day in day out? What about those who fear war or those who become extremely anxious because populism, racism and religious intolerance are on the rise in their country?
Stoicism.
We would be in a bad place if it wasn't for those that hope for the best but plan for the worst. Imagination of bad things happening is key to humanities survival. Not only do these superheros have to fight the uncertain future but they often have to fight the overoptimistic.
Well, those people should develop plans instead of thinking about it repeatedly. If you fear for having to caretake your parents then learn about caretaking laws and best practices and what the alternatives are to doing it yourself so your future self has less overwhelm once it happens. For the other examples the solutions range from growing resilience to fleeing the country. If a worry is real life based you make plans so it's less catastrophic.
For me, its a current situation with multiple potential outcomes and I default to the worst case scenario of the situation I am going through.
Me too my friend
I love that the youtube alogrithm recommended your channel to me.
Your tips and lessons are heaven sent
Thsnk you so much for talking some sense to my brain and also explaining how to cope in these times
Be safe and healthy
Hi mark. I usually don't ingest this type of content but stumbled across a couple of your videos and they've all been great. Your insights have proved to be fruitful for me. How should I pronounce the word "root"?
excelllentttt
Hi you are a great healer.
thanks
I think you're fantastic
Many of my clients are unwilling to really think about their fears. They're afraid they will "invite" that particular event into their lives because of the "law of attraction". Or they will quote a "mind control" course they once took that said they mustn't think about bad things. Kind of ruining their own options for getting rid of fear.
I had to confront this by myself
The "law of attraction" is soooo powerful.
It does and will manifest what you're giving attention to.
People truly were taught so much wrong stuff about the law of attraction that I'm genuinely sorry for them. They bypass the processing of their worst emotions still stuck in the nervous system on loop (which by theirs definition of it would kinda be the reason it continues on endlessly).
It was best video on the subject so far!
I'm always going to fear the future it makes me fucking paranoid 😢😢😢😢. I just want to stay young forever and never die because that stuff really affects me all the time. I also hate it because I think time is going way too fast.
What about now? Is it catasrophizing when there’s a worldwide pandemic?
It is the pickle I am at. I understand, usually catastrophizing is easy to overcome, but if you are afraid to dead for this virus, to the point of constant anxiety it is way harder, because in my case it would mean actually having to face getting it, with a chance it might actually kill u. COnsidering I am overweight, and the fact all that stressing also lowers the immune responses, that puts me in a higher risk category.
The odds are less than a million
You do have a certain amount of control over the pandemic by following the guidelines: wearing a mask, washing your hands, avoiding close contact with people, remaining six feet apart from people, etc.
@@TerranigmaQuintet my heart goes out to you
I tend to catasrophize everything. Health job especially i work in a high stress job family theft problems getting into troubles everything. Lately I'm trying to challenge myself. Starting with the small things like eating without washing the spoon again. Challenging the absurd thoughts
As the wise dialogue in "My Best Friend's Wedding" goes: this too shall pass.
I wonder if he has similar video about intellectulizing.
Here wondering how this applies to those of us who worry globally- will there be a true banking crisis etc. one one hand it’s based on rational risks because the financial system is risky and yet it could be worrying for no reason- or at least won’t happen in the near future.
This is good advice considering we're all completely screwed anyway....
This is essentially "regression towards the mean." Our highs and lows ultimately return to center.
I don't think this works is the feared event turns out to be traumatic. It's been 9 years since my abusive husband left me and I'm still not thriving due to PTSD. Sonetimes we don't thrive. Which makes me catastrophize about future events as I know that not-thriving is a real possibility.
Hello thanks so much I have a question I recently lost my husband and I'm having a difficult time trying to retrain myself through this new journey that I'm on I speak to several widows is there any advice for us. Thank you so much in advance
For me, I'm catastrophizing on the new job whether I can do well or not. And thinking to the extent of get fired from the new job.
3 Steps: 5:15, 6:17, 10:10
If i feel something at peace im getting always scared what if i dont feel it anymore
‘Americans’ pronounce route both ways. For example, Route 66 is pronounced “root” 66. If someone lives on a rural route we pronounce it as “rowt”. This also varies depending on what part of the country we live in. Be careful with generalizations.
LOL We do say 'root' for 'rout', at least in my region of America. Upper midwest. We're not all country bumpkins.
Funny this was BC. (before covid) makes these issues seem too simple
I am afraid of people's expectations of the future and how scary it is
Im always catastrophizing about the future im broke and i dont have a car so im always worried my bike tires gonna pop or the bus will be unreliable and ect
I once catastrophized before traveling across the country to my cousin's wedding that I would be anxious and puke in front of everyone. Meanwhile, the rational part of my brain kept saying "who the hell cares". IRRATIONAL thinking at its best.
My problem with 2021
What if my past mistake will happen again?
What if it will happen and i cant overcome it?
I dont wanna lose my cat, i dont wanna lose tablet, i dont wanna lose my freedom.
I dont wanna those thing happen again.
What are you doing about your mistakes so they don't happen again? And what can you learn from your mistakes so they won't happen again?
@@Historytellings i sometimes keep overthink about some moment that kinda remind me of year that i hate for.
And when it happen its like those bad moment come back to ruin my life again.
Thats why i need to overcome so i didnt ended up like my old self
Do people in the UK say the word "out" as "oot"? If not, why say "root" instead of "route"?
Lmao me currently crying because I’m 15 and dont know what job i want
I understand. I graduated highsxhool 2 years ago. You have time i promise. Feel free to message me if you need 💗
same 🥺
Becca Krackow 🤗
Becca Krackow this video is really helpful . What job did u get?
@@tonyissue4730actually, I thought I needed to have my wgole life planned, im about to finish cosmetology school in a few weeks and then move with my boyfriend ina. Few months 💕
I try and watch this video
but my mind is so distracted,
I'm in sheer paralyzed panic.
I've got no money.
what the fuck am I going to do?
I'm in paralyzed terror.
I'm desperate for a miracle...
I know me too sorry
How can we apply this to wider calamities, like climate change?
trust in God
@@joshuab2437 a god that lets these things happen?
@@joshuab2437 god created satan. Its the same as someone making a poison and then blaming the poison for the harm and not himself
@@frenzysporetv3431 It was humanity that disobeyed God in the Eden garden of God by taking the forbidden fruit
@@joshuab2437 if you created a robot to specifically be flawed, how can you blame it for said flaw? It's like dropping an apple on the ground and being mad that the apple splattered all over.