How Ego Controls us and How to Control Ego
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- Опубліковано 20 лип 2024
- 0:00 facilitating change with ego
8:15 cure for ego
10:40 personal permanent identity
16:10 how much meditation to see results
17:50 you being better than other people, elitist mindset
21:30 Vairagya, disinterested in success
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How does ego affect our decisions? How does ego make us worse? How do you deal with ego? Our interview with Krusif brought up the idea of ego and how it is impeding his progress. Dr. K has a few ideas about how ego is controlling him and how he can control ego.
In this video, Dr. K answers a few questions about ego.
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#MentalHealth #Ego #Elitism
Dr. K might be the best thing that ever happened to the internet. I'm not even kidding.
Seconded
Thirded
@Kevin Che i used to watch them and they just spout conservative ideology, Joe rogan is far more centrist but I would say healthy gamer is by far the superior option and dr k is extremely intelligent. Jordan Peterson is an intellectual fraud especially when it comes to politics, with religious people, if they believe in an illogical idea like god without burden of proof, who knows what else they would believe in that is illogical...
@Kevin Che who
@@dragonplayz6606 if u believe in god. youre an illogical person?
Dude, more people need to watch this guy, he's legitness.
Čuti i Prićaj he’a gonna blow massively soon
@@sneedmasterflsh pričaj means talk, ćuti means shut up, so my name is like thut up and shalk
He is blowing up currently. Look at where he was 1 month ago. like less than 5% of the views
man he's often much to vague and lacks a real presentation in these videos. If they would be redone, condensed based on his talks with clarifying powerpoint or so supporting the argumentations and examples, that would be greatness.
@@xxsuper99xx but it's a livestream, he isn't focusing his efforts on making 10/10 youtube videos. Also remember that he can't go into details or he'll get banned for giving medical advice :D
8:53 "CONFIDENCE & EGO are actually like on
a SEESAW:
the MORE CONFIDENT you are,
the LESS your EGO is active;
the more your ego is active,
the less confident you are
because the sense of confidence
isn't a sense of self that's based on comparison;
it's a sense of self that's based INTERNALLY."
This man is singlehandedly changing lives. Much love
Unhealthy Gamer: How does one cure ego ?
Dr.K: Reject Humanity, return to Monke
We knew it all along
Monke has ego, progress to crab, be without ego, scuttle scuttle scuttle into the future!!
Move into the woods and send people mailbombs
Dude just yesterday i learned that i have a very unhealthy way of always comparing myself to others and generally letting my ego get the best of me.
I do the same thing. I have waves of motivation and then episodes of overthinking about my future. Watching this helps so much.
1:41 "You try to change, and then
you notice that when you try to make a
change, you start to become uncomfortable;
that's the issue"
Last year I watched a ton of these videos and made so much personal progress. Some shit went down and I fell so far backwards, but I'm back to watching Dr. K's content again, and it's nice.
Glad you're doing better now friend. It's one thing to start and it's another to fall and rise from the ashes.
Same here.
theres always something to learn from dr.k
I realize now that I have a huge ego, yet I can't pinpoint where it exactly comes from. Surprisingly, no-one has ever accused me of being egotistic but I have been called cold and arrogant before.
Most People think ego is being braggadocio but its more of a cover up for insecurity
ye from my experience too, being cold to others is like 100% ego when i was scared or smth
The answer is probably “when was there a time where you felt like you needed to be egotistical.” Like, that and most things about people are a form of defense mechanism, the answer to where it comes from is what it’s defending.
@@HelixMaster12 Underrated comment. What are we defending? That's the real question.
You sir have just pulled the words I’ve always wanted to say out of my mouth
Healthygamer is the first big step in humans being effective at helping themselves and others in a massively accessible way
0:35 - 0:45: "Our mind prefers the comfortable to the good. This is important to understand: your mind prefers that which you know to that which is good."
12:51 - 14:28 Just a personal timestamp. This part was super salient for me so I'm saving it for if I have to come back to it later 😌
Thanks it was totally divine to me thank you
"Nature doesn't care, nature is gonna be nature" that's some golden sentence there, and also meme applicable
Mark my words, if you keep at it you’re gonna be huge! This is so important, and gives so much value to so many people at a time where it’s the most important. So happy I found you man, these last two days I’ve found so many valuable insights. Just thank you man.
Spot on!
Hes blown up a ton now
oh how right you were
669k subs at the moment. I watch their videos pretty much daily and I see how they're getting 1k to 2k new subscribers each day. It's great because it's really well deserved and it's content that everyone should, I won't say watch, but know that it exists and consider consuming it. The other day I watched a video from this guy from 2019 and he mentioned he had 45 viewers (the video is "What is ego - Dr K explains" or something like that, if you're curious) and I found it so great that the content from those times and the newer content are just as legit and well intended.
Yep
I'd like to take a moment to thank UA-cam for changing the recommendation algorithm and showing me Dr.K. I can finally work on myself now
A lot of these early videos are so insanely helpful man. Can't find info like this anywhere and the video only has 53k views. Incredible.
all of these videos just become more and more relatable omg im actually scared and frightened
"So if our teacher speaks of the renunciation of ego, we attempt to mimic renunciation of ego. We go through the motions, make the appropriate gestures, but we really do not want to sacrifice any part of our way of life." - Chögyam Trungpa
Maybe the paradox is that our society thinks the way to acceptance is through feats and accomplishments, but really the only way to even enjoy those feats and accomplishments is to feel like a success, feel like enough, before you even get there.
Reminds me of the hedonic treadmill
One thing I’ve learned is that if I want to be somthing else than what I am at this present moment then I have no choice but to deny myself what is comfortable. I’ve found a sense of freedom from worry about making no progress in life. As long as I deny myself bad food and deny myself freee time to go to the gym and deny myself alcohol I feel this sense of freedom from worry. This is what I’ve been missing out. And ironically I’m paying less attention to my progress as a result because I know where it will end if I keep going.
It seems a lot what Dr K is saying is to stop identifying with your conceptual schemes of how things are and instead identify with your ability on a consistent basis to transcend obstacles that present themselves when you decide to move toward something. This is the basic cure for nihilism that I think Nietzsche spoke about.
Dr K has had such a positive impact on so many people it's incredible
8:53 The confidence and ego seesaw analogy was like a fucking sniper just sploded my head
yep same
Fantastic stuff. The last part about bring detached from the result, while still putting in 100%, has been my goal as of late. Thanks.
Such helpful content. I really appreciate your presence on this platform
Dr. K's definition of Vairagya = "To do your best and leave the result up to a higher power"
Japanese translation of "Nintendo" (任天堂) = "Leave luck to heaven" (actual translation)
So Dr. K is saying that in order to relinquish the Ego, we must play Nintendo games? XD
Wii would like to play.
You are beyond indian and japanese philosophers
😂
damn so many uploads lately! keep it up, thanks for what youre doing
Beautifully put. Well done Dottore!
I've been feeling absolutely awful lately. I can't do anything, and I've come to think that all the stuff I have to do is beneath me. I'm currently in college, and it's not exactly a 'good' college. I was accepted at a 'good' college, but we couldn't pay for it. So I just lost all motivation and drive to do anything. This video really helped me understand what I can do to set my head straight. Thank you.
Have an interview with Vegan Gains!! He's been dealing with suicidal depression for a large portion of his life, and is very open about his problems.
Would love a conversation with him, please reach out to Richard!
He's a gamer also.
This is a much needed topic. Gamers like me tend to be alone as I don't like to play online and that creates an isolation and only further enforces the me vs them mentality. Thank you so much!
My notes on the video, please comment and share yours, or your thoughts
The mind prefers the comfortable over the good or unknown.
To do the good, try and change, even a little and take notice of what happens.
Do you get uncomfortable? Good. The first step to the path of change is being aware of what's going on.
What stopped you from striving towards your goal? What helped cause that stop?
For example if you try to eat good, but still go out to eat badly, figure out why? What was your mental state at the time it happened and what caused that mental state to happen and so on.
The end goal is to not be on autopilot and separate the yous within. You are not necessarily your immediate thoughts, but they are important and need to be acknowledged in order for you to detach and move on.
Like being afraid the water is cold in a pool. Acknowledge you are cold and jump in anyways.
The ego relies on comparison and is sort of inversely related to confidence. The more confident you are the less your ego is active. The ego also relies on comparisons. With this in mind one immediate way to experience an inactive ego is to get out in nature. It's hard to have an ego in nature, as there is no one around for you to compare yourself too, and nature itself doesn't care about you.
The root of ego is negative emotion. For example, if you have the mentality of being a smart kid, and a big ego to go along with it, ask yourself why. For me it was fear of failure and that if I actually tried I may not be as smart as I thought. Then the one thing I have "going" for me would not actually be true....
That said, don't get attached to your aspirations or "identity". Identity is not fixed and should not be part of your contentment. External sources, including identity may bring you happiness but it is only short lived. There is always more to strive for externally and one may never be happy.
You might be unhappy with aspirations of a future identity or having an identity that is not what you want. A way to fix this is to acknowledge that what is "good enough" in your mind, or what you should do may never be real. And you need to focus on what you can do today, even though it may not live up to your expectations and its okay. After all, even the worst put work, is better than the best imagined work that never gets acted upon
Remember that contentment comes from within. Learning to become attached to the results of your own actions and accepting yourself for who you are is ultimately how you become content.
How do you learn do detach and become more aware? It is a practiced skill that should be developed slowly over time, and one way is through meditation. Dr. K recommends 20 minutes a day, 5 times a week for at least 8 weeks. Go from there.
I wrote this more for myself and is not a direct relation of the video, but rather my own interpretation of it.
thanks !
You shouldn't become attached to the results. You should be striving to be detached from the results. Focusing on results is focusing on external validation.
8:53 - confidence and ego
12:41 - aspiration above what hes capable of right now
12:57 - just do your best everyday
Solid info. Thank you.
Wow, really glad that I stumbled on this...subbed.
I learn so much from this man, ik idk you Dr.K but i love you and all u do! Ur amazing :) Thank you
The ego trying to get rid of the ego is like trying to look at your own eyes. I mean knock yourself out but don't at the end of all this say that no warner came to you.
"I'm not good enough" is an ego.
Identity is NOT permanent.
Thank you bc this is what I deal with sometimes a lot of us have built alter egos consciously to combat the negativity the resistance to accepting our goals
I remembered the quote from Deus Ex Human Revolution "Change doesn't come without pain"
Can you make videos about youtube addiction? I literally quit gaming because it just got boring, but youtube is so diverse and interesting I could stare at videos for hours, not to mention all the music I consume...
I feel like we need more of dr. k dan he can humanly provide
We need to be our own Dr k
@hollow bastion this is actually 5Head
Listening to this a 0.5x makes Dr. K sounds like a really wise drunkard
You weren't even kidding, he sounds exactly like a drunk man at that speed. Amazing.
wait this is so funny 😂
just what I needed I watched the other ego video for a couple times today
Thanks Dr. K. Thanks to your motivation I went running to forest to higher up my self esteem, fell on the muddy ground and ended up with bloody arm and leg FeelsBadMan
did you do it again?
did you do it again?
Did you do it again?
Please make more content about the ego, a specially in regards to anxiety. This video out of context is all over the place and I feel like I can’t grasp/understanding anything you’re trying to explain.
Today I watched your boot camp to anxiety which was quite enlightening and then tried to look for videos on minimising ego. I saw that really old stream of yours (from before you had the disclaimer before every video and back when your stream setup was yellow instead of black and green.)
I agree with what you are saying. It seems like the content out there on this topic might not be enough
Dude,you're as real as they come !
When he says not good enough so often you instinctively start thinking about batteries and RAM
Dr k you saved this life of mine
I swear i wil strive for better shredding my hideen ego just for the sake of contentment
thank you
this is pretty epic
Recently decided my therapist wasn't a fit for me, glad my pal sent me a Dr k vid cuz he speaks to me lolol
I want to make what I think is a useful distinction in ego: (1) a defensive/emotional ego, and (2) constitutional ego.
I make this distinction because I thought that in a sense a big ego can be a good thing. I was trying to have this make sense in the face of defining ego as a defensive mechanism.
I think a defensive ego is like a shield that one more actively uses, and a constitutional ego is like health, more passive. A defensive ego tries to find and block attacks on the person. A constitutional ego endures attacks.
If one wants to endure attacks and not have them bother them as much, that I would imagine having a big constitutional ego means that more attacks are less effective. What this means in practice is to think highly of yourself in such a way that if an attack were true, you have a psychological frame/mindset/way of thinking that can handle being wrong there. You have a good philosophy for dealing with failure and being wrong.
You find value in acknowledging the truth when it hurts you. It turns out that it actually doesn’t objectively hurt you to discover that you made a mistake. The hurt was in making the mistake, not in discovering it. In fact, discovery of the mistake helps by taking a step towards fixing the problem.
I have heard the point of having a high enough self-esteem is good for cases when people might say things that attack your value.
I am not sure how helpful the advice is, because it does not seem to apply to me
I really wished I started watching dr. k 2 years ago.
It should be a requirement that all millennials and genz need to subscribe to this youtube channel. I have been living in a cage, you sir opened that door for me and i'll be forever grateful.
Personal notes:
The mind prefers the comfortable rather than the good.
If you want a change in your life you have to make a change in the process and stop focusing on the end result.
Subtle kinds of ego: Recognize thoughts of Im too good for this or Im better than other people. Ego pumps yourself up, and knocks other people down. Ego makes comparisons. If you derive solice or sense of identity out of being better of other people, that's ego. Ego is triggered by negative emotions; shame, hurt or someone else is better than you, the more egotistical you become. Ego is a defense mechanism.
Spend time in Nature to stop comparing yourself with others, it builds confidence. Confidence is a sense of self based internally.
Being able to recognize an emotion is important but its purpose is not to the end where the emotion disappears, it's to be able to see it and be able to sit with it, and not listen to it, eventually learning to control it.
It takes 20 mins, 3x - 5x a week for 8 weeks of meditation to see a clinical improvement.
Devote yourself to the action, as opposed to the result.
I always fell like even tho I suck and hate myself, I am also better than everybody else, like ?????????? I mean, I don't truly hate myself, and consciously I am very aware that nobody is better than anyone. But I can't help itttt, hate this feeling. Who can relate??
I have the same feeling and its pretty normal but as long as you respect others and yourself you'll be fine
maybe you are putting other people down to feel better about yourself? It's like "yeah I suck but at least I'm not like THOSE people." You might not actually believe that you are better than everyone else, but your mind just comes up with it to make yourself feel better.
Hey dr.k. Can you to release a book list. I'd love to read the books that you read.
He recommended Krishnamurti's books.
I recommend something like the gym or a sport you love, I started of pretty weak. And comparing wasn’t really what gave me motivation cause ofc I was weaker. So I was forced to compare to my self and celebrated every pr and now I’m extremely confident. And I think it’s really because of that, I also feel way more happy with how I look
Dude you deserve 1M subs, so much quality content here.
Such a legend
Confidence is important and so is humility. I try to use humor as a middle point. I read somewhere if you have never been humbled by a great challenge than you are yet to travel far enough beyond your comfort zone to know your true limits. So then after you have been down that road long enough and your beaten and exhausted how do you recover? Some say good food and humor.
14:02 "Being good enough is not about anything you do out there; it's what you feel INSIDE."
The title is misleading but content is great tier
Thank you
Hard thanks !
In my opinion this is the most important channel on UA-cam. Also if you want to see pure ego please check TechLead, I think it would be amazing if you finally succeed giving us an answer if is he is faking it or is he really made from pure ego.
broo i just checked the channel and literally its all about how rich he is HAHA, yeah its prolly pure ego xd
Your smile is the most precious treasure of Twitch ma dude!
Yojimbo711 gay
@@100kejimaeda you just have to be a twat dont you?
Le Baheeg 😂😂
@@100kejimaeda Get your ass on Alok's stream, you apparently need it.
But how do i deal with my ego when i'm with other humans? For example, when dancing?? How can i get confident, when i think i suck?
14:30 "He needs AWARENESS of the processes that goon within his mind."
Dr K. "Yeah calm down guys, I'm not here to earn money" lmao
4:28 "You need UNDERSTANDING and
AWARENESS of what is going on INSIDE YOU,
because what I'm hearing is
the end result.
I'm not hearing the PROCESS;
and if you want to make a CHANGE in your life,
it's NOT about focusing on
the end result;
you have to make a change
in the PROCESS.
if you want a different
outcome, you need to change your PROCESS."
FeelsAmazingMan
I read the title as eggos and threw my waffles away. 🤦♂️
0:33 "Our mind prefers the comfortable to the good."
What is the episode that this is related to? Thank you!
Do you still go bouldering Dr.K? I would love to go climbing with you
Ayyy Dr. K, do you think Super Smash Brothers can be a game that improves mental health (especially at a competitive level of gameplay).
9:24 Example - Spending time in nature when you're not near other people; hiking
My Ego turned me into a terrible human being. I didnt Just Hurt myself but also people arround me.
I hope you found a better way of interacting with people.
Who asked?
5:59 "RECOGNIZE when you have thoughts of
"I'M TOO GOOD for this" or
"I'M BETTER THAN other people".
Here is the CLUES of EGO:
Ego pumps yourself UP
and knocks other people DOWN,
and ego makes COMPARISONS;
so anytime you make a comparison
between two people,
that's EGO."
Who has such thoughts? Never had such thought in my life, what are you on about? Sounds like some hollywood line.
Where can I learn more about Vairagya?
4:48 "WHERE did the decision to make bad food START?
Did it start by skipping lunch?
Did it start by skipping dinner?
Did it start by working too much?
Did it start by not packing your bag?
Did it start by not waking up early enough?
Where did that start?
Did it start because you are in love with someone and they don't text you back?
It can start in all kinds of places.
You have to look at where the PROCESS STARTS
and HOW IT PROGRESSES.
That's how you make a CHANGE in the end,."
A sure way to defeat ego is delete social media like facebook, IG, snapchat
maybe for some people, but I'm sure there were plenty of egos before the 2000's
13:40 i got a 10,000 usd grant while my other colleagues got 100,000 usd grant. I get insecure a lot because of this. Still working with my anxi3ty and ego
How does this translate to sports? Or is it a completely different thing with different behaviors, etc?
Where can one find the Krusif interview?
Anyone know where the crucif video is? Is that how you spell it btw? Thanks
what about pride isn't ego and confidence combined?
If only i have watched ur videos earlier in my life. 😢
Hey buddy. You found them now. It's never too late to make a change. I believe in you.
The second best time is 'now'!
21:47 Detachment from success = the opposite of ego
"Vairagya" is detachment from the outcomes of your actions.
bro your fking amazing
Abuse is all I've ever known of love
Learned helplessness feelsbadman
Can you make a video about porn addiction ? it seems to be a bigger problem then people think , and it seems to go hand in hand with gamers
I dislike seeing "successful" people shoved in my face when I don't care about their accomplishments because they're in a field I value very little (acting, pop singing, etc.).
I've heard people say that I'm just "jealous" or that it's just ego but they would feel the same if successful people in the fields I value (independent 3D and so on) were shoved in their face on a regular basis.
don't get it. people weird
Spend time in nature.
8:45 "When you spend time in NATURE,
that's not going to build ego;
that's gonna build CONFIDENCE."
Does anyone know if it has to be 20 minutes straight for clinical benefit or would like twice a day for 10 minutes, something like that also work?
Better if its 20 min straight man rather than break it up. But if you are starting out 10min would be fine. Judt work it up to 20 min.
0:49 "People who get into abusive relationships often times get into another abusive relationship;
they have strings of abusive relationships and it's because it's something that they're familiar with; it's comfortable."
9:30 climb on top of that boulder and make a selfie to show off on insta.
BOXBOX NEXT PLEASE
Vairagya is detachment. It is letting go of everything. A person who is vairagi wouldn't care about a single thing. Shiva is the god of vairagya apparently also the god of destruction.