My struggle right now is that my 2 year relationship ended. It was the first time in my life that I felt properly supported and loved. Basically everyone else abandoned me or made me feel like I was deeply flawed. My ex partner always reassured me and told me that my fear of being abandoned is unrealistic and that they'll not lose feelings out of nowhere because that's not how a healthy Person works. And then exactly that happened. I left to visit my parents for some weeks and before that everything was as it always was and they made Plans with me for when I'm back and told me to not be scared about not seeing each other and then 1 1/2 weeks after I left they broke up with me out of nowhere and told me they don't love me as much as I love them. So now I feel like my biggest fear that I always told myself was just in my head and wasn't realistic became reality and I don't know how to ever trust and believe anyone again, because I can't trust in what people tell me about how they feel about me.
Please we definitely need part two like practical things to actually heal from the abandonment as more resources that are available are all about the problem and not about the actual solution. Also it will be a great help if u can do videos on healing from childhood traumas in general and to be able to stop attracting toxic and wrong romantic partners
I’ve read a lot it’s about regulating the nervous system(2x at least daily breathwork) being aware of the beliefs driving your behaviors and then meditating on the new beliefs, affirming and embodying the new identity.
Therapy is the key here it needs to be done with a securely attached person who could teach you what it feels like to feel safety emotionally it’s about getting reps in with this type of person to repattern your subconscious it’s really not possible alone we need the safety of this type of connection regularly to teach ourselves how to reparent ourselves I feel
I think that is the hardest part of knowing that my mom did her best and I still have issues. My dad wasnt there so I can blame him completely(I dont hate him, but it gives a understanding) but with my mom its harder to wrap my head around because she was there and did the best she could and I dont want her to feel like what she did wasnt good enough, but I still dont understand how I have abandonment issues because I know she did her best and I appreciate it.
Oh poor my daugther 😢i dont want her to feel safe with me but i Been sick when she got 6 yrs ! 😢but im been there for here , but i have trauma inside i dont now how deal with
I learned to be my own hero. Now I'm older and due to medical issues I'm not very mobile anymore and unable to do the things I used to without relying on others. My issue is that when I try to bond with people I am always the one to initiate contact. I used to be popular and had no trouble socialising. Now I never get invited anywhere. My own invitations are also rejected. I'm 66 and use a cane so it's becoming harder to go out alone cos I feel like damaged goods. The hardest part is when I hurt myself trying to do a thing that used to be easy and injure myself. My grandfather was my rock in a family that I never felt part of. He died when I was 10 and I learnt to be self sufficient and not rely on people. I used to be pretty and popular because I was kind and caring. I always bounced back from rejection and moved on. Now I'm stuck. Unable to occupy myself and nobody seems to have any desire to connect with me even though I'm still well groomed and friendly. I just feel obsolete and I am aware that this is causing emotional pain and social anxiety but each day is harder to get through. All the podcasts seem to focus on younger people.
Hey Bela, really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with Best Quality Editing in your videos better than your Editor with good pricing and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail which will help your videos to reach to a wider audience ? Pls let me know what do you think ?
How self regulate. Meditation, imagination? Hmm. It's not that easy. Well try something I guess won't hurt. Seems like a lot of thought work that could be exhausting. How about prayer and some self inventory. Keep it simple more.
It feels like my nervous system are stucked in fight flight
My struggle right now is that my 2 year relationship ended. It was the first time in my life that I felt properly supported and loved. Basically everyone else abandoned me or made me feel like I was deeply flawed. My ex partner always reassured me and told me that my fear of being abandoned is unrealistic and that they'll not lose feelings out of nowhere because that's not how a healthy Person works. And then exactly that happened. I left to visit my parents for some weeks and before that everything was as it always was and they made Plans with me for when I'm back and told me to not be scared about not seeing each other and then 1 1/2 weeks after I left they broke up with me out of nowhere and told me they don't love me as much as I love them. So now I feel like my biggest fear that I always told myself was just in my head and wasn't realistic became reality and I don't know how to ever trust and believe anyone again, because I can't trust in what people tell me about how they feel about me.
This has been the best and most informative video on this subject EVER!! Thank you for sharing and explaining in such great detail.
i've watched a lot of videos on abandonment but your explanation was by far THEEE BEST! loved this queen!!!
Please we definitely need part two like practical things to actually heal from the abandonment as more resources that are available are all about the problem and not about the actual solution.
Also it will be a great help if u can do videos on healing from childhood traumas in general and to be able to stop attracting toxic and wrong romantic partners
I’ve read a lot it’s about regulating the nervous system(2x at least daily breathwork) being aware of the beliefs driving your behaviors and then meditating on the new beliefs, affirming and embodying the new identity.
Therapy is the key here it needs to be done with a securely attached person who could teach you what it feels like to feel safety emotionally it’s about getting reps in with this type of person to repattern your subconscious it’s really not possible alone we need the safety of this type of connection regularly to teach ourselves how to reparent ourselves I feel
I am so afraid to be alone , be left that i do everything for others, so i dont now how who I am again
I think that is the hardest part of knowing that my mom did her best and I still have issues. My dad wasnt there so I can blame him completely(I dont hate him, but it gives a understanding) but with my mom its harder to wrap my head around because she was there and did the best she could and I dont want her to feel like what she did wasnt good enough, but I still dont understand how I have abandonment issues because I know she did her best and I appreciate it.
Thank you for creating these videos, i'm sure I'm not the only one excited about this podcast from you! Would love a part 2 of this episode.
Thank you 🙏🏼
hmm this feels like a warm hug of encouragement 💝
Hi i have abandontment trauma , i got Fatigue, Brianfog , stiffeness etc
Can i have contact you ? I want to heal
Thank you very much for this. I'm very grateful, for how this is helping me navigate some challenges.
What kind of camera are you using? ❤ great video 🙏
Oh poor my daugther 😢i dont want her to feel safe with me but i Been sick when she got 6 yrs ! 😢but im been there for here , but i have trauma inside i dont now how deal with
I learned to be my own hero. Now I'm older and due to medical issues I'm not very mobile anymore and unable to do the things I used to without relying on others. My issue is that when I try to bond with people I am always the one to initiate contact. I used to be popular and had no trouble socialising. Now I never get invited anywhere. My own invitations are also rejected. I'm 66 and use a cane so it's becoming harder to go out alone cos I feel like damaged goods. The hardest part is when I hurt myself trying to do a thing that used to be easy and injure myself. My grandfather was my rock in a family that I never felt part of. He died when I was 10 and I learnt to be self sufficient and not rely on people. I used to be pretty and popular because I was kind and caring. I always bounced back from rejection and moved on. Now I'm stuck. Unable to occupy myself and nobody seems to have any desire to connect with me even though I'm still well groomed and friendly. I just feel obsolete and I am aware that this is causing emotional pain and social anxiety but each day is harder to get through. All the podcasts seem to focus on younger people.
Thank you for Sharing your Story!! Sending love to you, you are Not alone ❤️❤️
Is it to realese emotions who are the key , everybody say i should seat with them but ?! It just be more and more anixty
Thank you for creating and sharing.
please do part 2! loved this!!
Thank you so much for this information 🙏🏽
Part 2! 💝
please, part two ❤
Do you think this would work for men too?
Was to express feelings a part ?
Thank you!!
please help me :(
Babe thank you
Hey Bela, really nice video ! I was wondering if I could help you with Best Quality Editing in your videos better than your Editor with good pricing and also make a highly engaging Thumbnail which will help your videos to reach to a wider audience ? Pls let me know what do you think ?
How self regulate. Meditation, imagination? Hmm. It's not that easy. Well try something I guess won't hurt. Seems like a lot of thought work that could be exhausting. How about prayer and some self inventory. Keep it simple more.
Did You have brainfog ..its like my nervous system are så sensitive now