Table News: Project 25
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- Опубліковано 26 чер 2024
- The news of the week! Project 25 might be the biggest grift in the nation, Kristi Noem can't walk in 12% of her state, and CICADAS!!!!!
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Ah, nothing as ominous as starting with a name like project 25
brown 25 😊
at least it's funnier than project 24
Minnesota couldn't make it to the Table this time. They're currently trapped under water.
And dealing with a damned dam situation. Hello from Mankato! (Yes the dam is in Rapidan, but still)
Has Minnesota made an appearance since we got a new flag?
Good thing we have plenty of boats in Minnesota. Who wants to go tubing?
I can vouch for that. Like half the state’s underwater.
You only need one word to describe the new flag: BORING!!!
34 convictions? Try not to commit any more felonies on the way to the parking lot!
I understood that reference.
Trial one out four.
There’s still three more rounds of convictions to sit through
I would like that comment, but I'm not even supposed to BE here today!
Trump has so many felony convictions. They made a law about him just look up Trump rule 34.
Don't worry. He will.
The voters in Florida passed a Constitutional Amendment that certain felons could regain their right to vote by serving their prison sentence. However, the governor and legislature, not liking the fact the voters won, made a law that the felons also have to pay every penny of fines/monetary awards, plus the costs of arresting them, trying them and convicting them
I would say that sounds unconstitutional, but that wouldn't stop Florida from anything. 🤷🏼♀️
Seems to be a running theme these days of republican legislatures trying to override successful/popular ballot initiatives
Ah, you mean "legal for the rich" laws. Yeah, that tracks.
So poll taxes are back...
@@GoErikTheRed I think their plan is to make these ridiculous laws _knowing_ that they'll be challenged in court, then play the lawsuit game all the way up to their stacked SCOTUS where precedent will be set, affirming the "constitutionality" of the blatantly unconstitutional law.
That Sioux line was gold! 😂
I feel like the line didn't get enough of a reaction in the sketch
Ah yes, project 2025. Back in my day we called it the night of the long knives, but you do you cheeto in chief
Cheeto in Chief is hilarious and I'm stealing that lol
Same!
The people trying to fight to implement the Night of the Long Knives: America Edition, know what they're doing they just don't care or are all in on the Holocaust: America Edition.
Just lately learned this phrase had a Nazi association. (1934)
I still think of Britain's in 5th century: Saxon invader Hengist invited Vortigern and his crew to peace talks, then slew them, apparently on Salisbury plain.
@@axolirvin971I'm a fan of Orange Julius Caesar or Tangerine Palpatine myself.
The cicadas were WILD, dude. Even all the way up by Chicago. So excited to have a new sketch!!!
Cicadas are certainly nuts, we had em in Maryland a few years ago. One nearly died at my feet, so I took my shoe and tried to end its suffering, only for it to get up and crawl away
My walk to work was so loud it was nuts. I had to walk carefully around certain bushes or else the whole cicada orgy would take flight
They made it all the way to St. Louis too, it was insane
I live in Chicago (near the lake), work in the Loop, and haven’t heard a single one yet.
Of course, maybe it’s more due to all those years as a percussionist … and a few spent in really loud dance clubs, lol!
idk much about the cicadas here (twin cities minnesota) but my iowa pals sent me cicadas on the bar menus, so that should say something about the situation
[Speaks New York] those [speaks Boston] cicadas.
If you're speaking New York or Boston, you prob'ly don't have to worry about cicadas. Is speaking Chicago a thing?
@stevena105 [Speaks Chicago] yeah, it is. 😁
Yeahhhh, the Cicadas are Cicading. They’re loud, slow, and dumb as rocks. They do NOT dodge cars, and they make only slightly less noise and mess than hitting a deer, so…
Sorry, are you talking about Cicadas, or Project '25 supporters?
@@shavedwookie699 Yes.
Had that happen on the way to work the last time the broods came out. Had my window open. I was only going 40 and it hit the door so hard I thought a rock had hit.
@@annbuccieri1267😂😂😂😂😂
Hey, at least it's not a moose
Fun fact in the United States native American lands are considered there own independent micro nations meaning they do not have to follow their state or federal laws thats why a large number of native lands have casinos on them even if in that state gambling is illegal
No the feds still have power over them, the casinos are a part of a deal made with the USFG that allows them to have them but the casinos have to put back into the tribe - source my friend that literally lives on a native reservation.
So what did the governor do? I feel like we could have gone deeper on that one
@@tesseracttitan6445She's just a terrible person. I'd ban her from my house too, if I lived in South Dakota.
@@tesseracttitan6445She claimed tribes were working with cartels to traffic guns and drugs
@@tesseracttitan6445see the previous episode? I think he explained, but basically the governor of SD has made a series of disrespectful, racist, and blatantly false comments in speeches in public appearances about Native tribes.
Haven’t been this early in a long time. Let’s avoid project 2025 being a thing
There's a 95% chance it won't, even if Trump wins.
Eternal vigilance is the price of freedom!
Or as Jon Stewart pointed out, democracy is a lunch pail job. Have to keep doing it.
As a Mainah, when Massachusetts showed up and greeted everyone with "F*** you, f*** you, f*** you and f*** you", I just started cackling...
"I can think of 34 things..." I am so glad Im from NY.
the hair game is amazing
it took me way too long to realize last admin was shirtless
I had to re-watch it because I was completely distracted by the lack of shirt and the hair.
@@user-cn3xb1yn4n thought I found neckline of flesh toned t shirt.
Now I'll have to rewatch it! Ow! Ow!
I just like how his American Flag pin is upside down. Really classy.
@@user-pt3gi5ul2e
No, he just shaved a straight line over his chest-
@@LucanVaris
It's like an inverted pentagram if both versions just represented evil anyway.
I have lived in South Dakota for 37 years and have a very literal mind. How have I never thought of that pun before?
I love news from the table
Absolutely brilliant, crowdsourcing the employees for your next administration. Exactly the level of foresight I would expect from the leader of a failed coup.
Hey! I'm pretty sure you still have to answer honestly about whether you're competent _and_ Republican! I mean, it's not like people are allowed to _lie_ on the Internet, right!?
...R-right? ;~;
"She should Sioux" Bro that's a good pun
Ohio lights a river on fire every year right?
How do you appease an angry water god?
- Minnesotan
Now we need Fl to find out Panthers won the Stanley cup.
replying so ben sees this!!!
nearly 1000 pages of terrifying documentation, pull it up and use the find feature to navigate.
I still get told it's fake. Or sensationalist.
@@stevena105 doesn’t surprise me. They think it’s not real until they get a right taken away and it suddenly affects them.
The Pillars joke really got me
Same, subtle but brilliant
It is a...Loss cause.
I've missed this! ❤
Last time I was this early Ben was still in the Army!
Finally the cicadas and the stench of their decomposing bodies are gone. They were so loud people were coming to my town to hear them. Cicada tourism
My ears are still buzzing from the noise
😅 I once had a hotel guest call down to lobby to ask when the construction noise would stop. I was confused as I did not know of any construction going on nearby. I had to go outside to figure out what noise he was talking about...
He apparently had no idea what cicadas are, and I had to explain the whole thing and that there was nothing I could do about it
Got cicada cookies?
Hey, Illinois resident here. At their peak the cicada noise was 94 decibels. That's as loud as a band saw. Constantly sawing outside your window. According to OSHA that's only safe for 15 minutes a day and it's 5 decibels away from permanent hearing damage with sustained exposure
Turn off your autocorrect if it doesn't believe in decibels!
Western Washington State: "What Cicadas?"
Hearing about the insane bugs and other critters is what keeps me from leaving this state😅.
As a western Washingtonian, my first experiences with cicadas was through anime...
as someone who currently lives in the state of illinois the cicadas where crazy there where so many if them that you couldn’t go outside because they would maul you. but luckily for me they are finally gone after a while month of my suffering
Please check in on WV and the latest with a certain governor’s dog being memorized in a newly revealed mural in our Capitol that’s supposed to represent historic West Virginia.
OK but be honest, would you rather have a real historic West Virginian 'hero' or a dog? I personally would pick the dog.
I'm afraid to google this because it is, after all, WV. Is the dog at least wearing a historical costume? Nah, forget I asked
@@eristhechaosspirit9707 Is it a cute dog??? 😏
Cricket of SD?
not going to lie I think I'm fine with that.
Love how Florida once again forgot that a team there won the cup
What's a hockey?
"Buy my book, buy my book, buy my book" to quote The Critic.
YAYYYYY Back to the table
For a Florida guy, I can't believe you missed the Panthers winning Lord Stanley's cup!
"She should Sioux" thank god for captions or I would've missed that gem.
Thank you I missed these this is the best way to get my news
Also I love the hats in the background
This is exactly what I needed to see after that debate 😬
Within a minute! Thank you UA-cam!
The Sioux joke Was great
The reason he can still run for office while being a convicted felon is so people in office don't make up false charges and convict their rivals. Or something along those lines.
WE ARE SO BACK
"She should Sioux"😂👏 Class A Joke
This project is really summed up in this parody: "And they really just want to change the pace/ of destroying everything for the human race."
Let’s go Celtics!
Florida also says the right to vote if convicted in another state depends on the laws of that other state. In NY, a felon only loses their right to vote WHILE SERVICE THE SENTENCE. Since there is no way the Convict from Florida will serve time prior to the election, he will be eligible to vote in his "home state."
Serving their sentence includes probation and community service.
@@elaexplorer For New York: If you are on parole, probation, or have fully completed your sentence, you may register to vote and cast a ballot. Your voting rights can be revoked again if conditions of your parole are violated.
Just in time for the geriatric fight tonight, perfect
Oh how i missed them.
Ben is one of only 2 people I have ever met that immediately understood how siouxsen was pronounced
Ben is a genius!
glad to see you , sir.
what a time to be alive.
I always wonder if there is a picture or a list of which state has to look where. Is that even specified? And what shape is the table? The only thing I know is that Florida is infront of DC
And Alaska's always there. Somewhere.
"She should Sioux"
LMAO
I hate political stuff so much most of the time lately. I’ve just reached my limit. Even when it’s in joke format. But these are still amazing. (Don’t worry people I still stay informed just don’t let being informed trump my well-being).
Rase of hands who watched the presidential debate last night and has decided we're all screwed 🖐
“WHO THE F- IS TINGUS PINGUS?!”
"At least he's documented" "mostly my pride"... Texas with some bangers this episode
Man. Im glad this is how i get my news, idc if i already knew half of it lol
First president convicted of federal crime?
Me: ...how was Nixon not convicted via the Watergate scandal?
Like Cali said, they all resigned beforehand
Impeached by the house, RMN scampered before conviction by the senate.
He was pardoned before a conviction
He can still run for president is kinda logical. It was a measure to stop imprisoning of poltical opponents as a measure to knock them off the ballot.
I'm OK with the legal ability of felons to run. I'm aghast that THIS candidate is encouraged and supported by a major political party. And further, that any of the People are expecting him to work in their best interets.
@@andiward7068 exactly lol
This one had me laughing pretty hard. I'm looking forward to seeing you live later this year!
As a Illinois citizen can I hear more about the cicada stuff, because from my experience I don’t think the bugs have made it down to the south yet
Hello from Madison County. They were across the river in St. Louis. For the most part they didn't come out on our side. But we're due.
I think it depended on your locality. Near my house, I barely heard any. But when I went to the local university, which is on the edge of town with a lot of trees, they were there and LOUD.
@CortexNewsService It’s not so much the amount of trees but the age of trees. Cicadas do their hibernation thing in the root systems of trees. The two big broods are the 13 and 17 year broods this year which means that you have to have trees that are at least 17 years old to have the massive amounts of cicadas.
@@kathrynredmond5294 which is why I was surprised we had so few. I live in a dense, historic neighborhood near the city center. Most of the trees are big and old, actually towering over most of the homes. And it was silent.
Two broods of cicadas this year (every 13th and every 17th) near where I live. Very loud.
Glad to see you back at it
She should Sioux is a great line 😆
Welcome back! ❤🎉
Love the subtle "5 pillars of Islam" reference in the opening
This was a banger of a video. Keep it coming, Ben!
The table is backkkkkkkkk
"she literally could not" 10/10
it hurts my brain so much
You should do a skit on the fact that some states are now requiring state IDs to access adult sites
I feel like at least part of the motivation for this video is showing off that glorious head of beautiful, bouncing, gleaming, lusciously thick locks. I wish that hair was my hair, but I would only mistreat it if it were.
Great video.
Nice Lilo & Stitch reference. You did your homework!!
New table idea. I wanna see Oregon say you're welcome to Tennessee for Dutch Brothers' coffee. There's now several locations here and as a former Oregonian, I love it
The Cicadas are basically gone. Now it's toooo quiet!!!!! Another one. Good to see u back bud.😃
Lol im from Boston and never heard anyone call them the C's
That Sioux joke at the end was real smart. Surprised to see nobody talking about it down here
Loved the 5 pillars insert there. Wasn't expecting it, but well played.
thank you for makeing this comdecial
THANK YOU
I’m just surprised he has said nothing about Idaho.
Oh, so it was just Illinois.I feel so validated.
Fabulous! Love this. 🎉
Not loving that you have more than enough inspiration for the first part.
Although the "more orange" quip is priceless 😂😂😂
"They legally cannot" lmao
That good quality work
Please cover the Debate!
Save us, Ben!
im glad i rewatched that as i missed the soiux joke
It's about time!!!!!😂🤣
The jokes rocked
The more I read or hear about Project 25, the more I find it terrifying.
The table is my favorite
Please do the library in Idaho that is now adults only.
In Louisiana, we have voted for felons who are still in jail.
Damn Cicadas invaded Illinois
Wake up, babe. A new Table News dropped.
Unanimously convicted.. XD
No Florida winning the Cup? Revoke this man's pubsub privileges.
as a south southern illinois you got that right
It does make sense that the Stanley Cup wasn't mentioned-Floridians don't know about it, and the team they faced isn't American. Loved the cicada mention.