The Fixer | Black Books | Series 2 Episode 3 | Absolute Jokes

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  • Опубліковано 15 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 192

  • @poundlandvodka
    @poundlandvodka 5 років тому +625

    when I find myself in times of trouble
    , bernard black comes to me, speaking words of wisdom: "you can find work and sort your life out anytime. the pub closes in five hours"

    • @heresfrankbetches921
      @heresfrankbetches921 3 роки тому +10

      This is deep

    • @Xarfax321
      @Xarfax321 2 роки тому +5

      It sort of fits with let it be... I mean "let it be: just go to the pub and have a pint"

    • @redwarf8118
      @redwarf8118 Рік тому

      @@Xarfax321 thats what Jem Walker intended ;)

    • @Mbnewman087
      @Mbnewman087 Рік тому +1

      reminds me of homer simpson when he eats a bunch of mayo and drinks a bottle of vodka. he says thats a problem for tomorrow homer. man i dont wanna be that guy.

  • @pia91
    @pia91 3 роки тому +169

    The empty bullshit phrases in Fran's "presentation" were such a brilliant parody

    • @Celyncoin
      @Celyncoin Рік тому +13

      Parody?! That presentation got me promoted!

  • @staudinga
    @staudinga 5 років тому +326

    "I'm a quitter. I come from a long line of quitters. It's amazing I'm here at all!"

    • @ninakoscioek4194
      @ninakoscioek4194 4 роки тому +4

      This one sums me up perfectly :D

    • @rasmusn.e.m1064
      @rasmusn.e.m1064 4 роки тому +2

      The oxymoron hiding in plain sight then pointed out in rhythmically similar fashion. It's pretty god-damn genius!

    • @ardantuzunsoy5602
      @ardantuzunsoy5602 4 роки тому +6

      "I come from a long line of quitters" is actually a quote from Seinfeld.

    • @staudinga
      @staudinga 4 роки тому +8

      @@ardantuzunsoy5602 Ah yes, you're right. I hadn't heard that one before I made that comment and only recently got into Seinfeld.
      I think the "It's amazing I'm here at all" part really makes the joke though.

    • @OfficialAnarchyz
      @OfficialAnarchyz 4 роки тому +1

      Seinfeld. Just like I found a lot of Seinfeld in Community

  • @benkruger3743
    @benkruger3743 4 місяці тому +8

    Fran turning over the blank page at the start of her presentation is gold 😂

  • @bezzaderbane9890
    @bezzaderbane9890 6 років тому +225

    Bill's hair is a character all unto itself lol

    • @AghastRaven
      @AghastRaven 5 років тому +9

      ' its a horse in a man costume is what it is!!

  • @MrUppertorso
    @MrUppertorso 4 місяці тому +8

    I can’t tell what I love more: The extended standing ovation for Fran’s winged presentation or Danny’s genuine childish glee and pride in the final shot.

  • @justinreyez5561
    @justinreyez5561 6 років тому +166

    "She's playing with fire, he's not ready for wiggly pig" Lol

    • @justinreyes5042
      @justinreyes5042 6 років тому +15

      Relax man its just a part we all found funny...sorry that ruins your day

    • @luthienprice2949
      @luthienprice2949 6 років тому +18

      It's "Nibbly Pig". But yeah, one of the best lines of the episode.

  • @TheKajunkat
    @TheKajunkat 5 років тому +82

    The ending is classic...reading Pride and Prejudice..hahaha.

  • @Momo74153
    @Momo74153 6 років тому +320

    How many people pretending to be adults like Fran pretends to know what she is doing. She truly is a legend!

    • @censusgary
      @censusgary 5 років тому +35

      MoMo K : The truth is that a great deal of being an adult is pretending to know what you’re doing.

    • @ivo8312
      @ivo8312 3 роки тому

      google bullshit jobs!

    • @gui18bif
      @gui18bif 2 роки тому +1

      I am xd

    • @emriys1334
      @emriys1334 2 роки тому +6

      at my work, I know two. By god I wish I was joking but I am not. One of those guys literally has no idea how to do his job, no clue, he's the facility manager (I'm in maintenance, as in repairing the production machines) and he calls me whenever anything happens, and every time I have to explain to him who to call (plumber, electrician, HVAC etc.). A few months back, he suddenly asked me if I can write a purchase order for him.... he has been in that job for 15 years and can't write a purchase order, I have NO idea how he managed to purchase goods and services for the extremely large facility until now. I am not even remotely in his department but since we need bloody water to produce our stuff, I had to write the order myself so we can get some goddamn water.

    • @LordOfGilneas
      @LordOfGilneas 2 роки тому

      @@emriys1334 Bloody hell, It's a wonder your building is still standing considering that.......

  • @TheFlair4thedramatic
    @TheFlair4thedramatic 5 років тому +189

    The bath scene was very stressful to watch!
    I know none of it was plugged in but I still feel like Bill is lucky to be alive.

    • @simonhollad5511
      @simonhollad5511 5 років тому +5

      Even off it was on there is usually gfci safety plug in bathrooms, which would pop the breaker before hurting him

    • @jenniferpearce1052
      @jenniferpearce1052 5 років тому +7

      @@simonhollad5511 In England? Not sure their electrical standards are the same as the US. I've read that they don't allow outlets near their bathroom sinks & tubs.

    • @darek4488
      @darek4488 4 роки тому +7

      @@jenniferpearce1052 It's true. In UK most of the time there are no outlets in bathrooms.

    • @ivo8312
      @ivo8312 3 роки тому

      @@darek4488 at all?? how do girls straighten/curl their hair

    • @darek4488
      @darek4488 3 роки тому +3

      @@ivo8312 They do it in their room

  • @magnetiktrax
    @magnetiktrax 5 років тому +62

    "She's playing with fire! He's not ready for nibbly pig"
    I almost choked to death on my breakfast. 😆

  • @synthetictiger3544
    @synthetictiger3544 2 місяці тому +2

    it is truth universally acknowledged that this is the most funny tv show. Brilliant writing.

  • @albatroce2324
    @albatroce2324 3 роки тому +51

    "I bet his corn flakes try to crawl out of the bowl" is such a brilliant line!

  • @EnoVarma
    @EnoVarma 6 років тому +55

    The ending is a beauty.

    • @ScoriacTears
      @ScoriacTears 4 роки тому

      An Irony, a famouse first sentence, but more of a plagiarism than a beauty. . . I wouldn't argue with him though haha x ;).

  • @adamg9173
    @adamg9173 4 роки тому +46

    Man, that was great. “ I always get woozy, before the screams start.” That would have made my blood run cold

  • @TheDeppertLasseVogt
    @TheDeppertLasseVogt Рік тому +6

    "Who's Harry? I don't have a boat!" That delivery kills me every time.

  • @hnevko
    @hnevko 6 років тому +46

    "aaaaaaah, who's Harry? I don't have a boat".

  • @mgonzalezamorano
    @mgonzalezamorano 2 роки тому +8

    "She's playing with fire, he's not ready for nibbly pig" HAHAHAHA

  • @fimspeeway
    @fimspeeway 5 років тому +23

    Bill looks very sharp in his gangster suit

  • @linnflame
    @linnflame Рік тому +1

    This is by far the best episode, second place is the grapes of wrath! I love the dynamic between Manny and Bernard!!

  • @reinukius2
    @reinukius2 6 років тому +53

    "..and he can go back to whatever semen shelter he was born in" definitely one of the top 10 meanest tings to say :D

    • @theoriginalchefboyoboy6025
      @theoriginalchefboyoboy6025 5 років тому +33

      probably Seamen's Shelter - common lodging in most seaports for sailors, fwiw

    • @planescaped
      @planescaped 5 років тому +9

      Although telling someone to go back the the sperm bank they came from is pretty mean. XD

    • @maggiepaine483
      @maggiepaine483 2 роки тому

      Born in.

  • @onimoney
    @onimoney 4 роки тому +14

    This show is so underrated underrated tr it's my favorite.

  • @kevinmi42
    @kevinmi42 11 місяців тому +3

    The step ladder used by gus was a brilliant prop

  • @maxmach4361
    @maxmach4361 Рік тому +3

    "She's playing with fire, he's not ready for nibbly pig"
    Almost choked because of that line. Why the writing in this show is so good?

  • @reasonablyserious
    @reasonablyserious 6 років тому +53

    Rob is really great in this^^

  • @coopsterthomas5421
    @coopsterthomas5421 Рік тому +5

    Im amazed fran drew a perfect circle in her presentation hahahha 15:50

  • @goldenretrievereatssh1t
    @goldenretrievereatssh1t Рік тому +2

    that meeting is the best meeting ever lol

  • @keepdancingmaria
    @keepdancingmaria 5 років тому +68

    What happened to Fran's shop? It close because she was never there, so now she's looking for a job?

    • @onimoney
      @onimoney 4 роки тому +7

      Maybe it doesn't get customers

    • @onimoney
      @onimoney 4 роки тому +2

      Maybe it doesn't get customers

    • @AS-yo2uy
      @AS-yo2uy 4 роки тому +14

      i think she sold the shop because she was havin a life crisis i believe

    • @pepperachu
      @pepperachu 2 роки тому +5

      Yep sold it and bought random things including a car

    • @12345NOU54321
      @12345NOU54321 2 роки тому +1

      She did sell a lot of wank, didn't she?

  • @heather3303
    @heather3303 7 місяців тому +2

    I worked at Telstra in Australia for eight months and had no idea what I my job was every day, I was given jobs to do, had no idea what the job involved or how to do it! I found it very stressful- however nobody noticed

  • @MrStephenRGilman
    @MrStephenRGilman 4 роки тому +12

    Rob Bryden's impression of Michael Caine was sneaking through when he was yelling into the telephone.

  • @jailcatjones3250
    @jailcatjones3250 9 місяців тому +3

    Its insane how many adults dont know how to read.
    Also benard sounds like a husky when he cries.

  • @sheilahmercer1637
    @sheilahmercer1637 8 місяців тому +1

    This show has made me realize that I love my thumbs too! 😂

  • @Samts16
    @Samts16 3 роки тому +13

    I've watched the scene at 7:19 a million times. It still cracks me up and i still cant understand what bernard did with that crisp thingi XD

  • @HonestlyAnnaFun
    @HonestlyAnnaFun 3 роки тому +3

    The smack in the head and shut up was all Fawlty towers.

  • @8.3.4.N
    @8.3.4.N Рік тому +2

    16:42
    best moment when manny walks out in his suit lmao

  • @NxDoyle
    @NxDoyle 6 років тому +89

    Here's an odd little thing. Ricky Grover, who plays Danny, was illiterate until his 30's thanks to dyslexia.
    On another note, his performance as Hillary in Getting On was excellent, playing against the thuggish 'geezer' type.
    "GET ON WITH IT!!!"

    • @skullsaintdead
      @skullsaintdead 5 років тому +3

      Omg! Yes, I thought I knew him as something other than a thug! Love Getting On!

    • @mooncat6491
      @mooncat6491 2 роки тому +1

      Dyslexia doesn’t make you illiterate.

    • @Zzyzzyzzs
      @Zzyzzyzzs Рік тому +2

      It can do if you never learn and people give up on you. Tough upbringings and all that.

    • @redneckhippiefreak
      @redneckhippiefreak Рік тому

      @@mooncat6491 User it odse, If oyu anc't ese het lrttes in Hte ocrrtce odrer hwo acn yuo earln ot dear.? Ironically, before it was recognized that the sufferers with dyslexia could not name/see/interpret the correct arrangement of letters, they simply could not be taught how to read so, they in fact remained illiterate. There have only been a hand full of self taught readers and none of them are dyslexic.

  • @QuincyHardaway
    @QuincyHardaway 4 роки тому +6

    "Take care, creepy guy who plays with his balls all the time."

  • @maximillianford9301
    @maximillianford9301 4 роки тому +2

    'But with Harry.... on the boat' cracks me up every time hahahaha. So random

  • @bennylloyd-willner9667
    @bennylloyd-willner9667 3 роки тому +5

    @15:15, How many consultants don't do much more than this for lots of dough 😂

  • @FutureChaosTV
    @FutureChaosTV 6 років тому +34

    Bathroom scene: Don't do this at home, kids! ;-)

    • @maltazor666
      @maltazor666 5 років тому +4

      Your're not my dad, sod off!

    • @eddiegness
      @eddiegness 4 роки тому +6

      I totally agree. Nobody has toast for breakfast when you can get Eggo waffles instead.

  • @calm_compost
    @calm_compost 5 років тому +5

    Lmaoooo...The corporate bit though...😂😂😂😂

  • @owenf6734
    @owenf6734 5 років тому +2

    The boy playing Pocket Billiards at 6:24 hahaha.

  • @troygaspard6732
    @troygaspard6732 8 місяців тому

    A truly classic episode. The great pretender

  • @imokin86
    @imokin86 4 роки тому +3

    Aaaaagh, the ending! Pure gold.

  • @ashx8772
    @ashx8772 2 роки тому +5

    Anyone else notice Nugent as the cop from ep 1? He’s undercover !!

  • @PeterPonomarenko
    @PeterPonomarenko 7 місяців тому

    3:00 A contraption Gary and Tony from MBB would've been proud to have had!

  • @sjdaughteroftheking
    @sjdaughteroftheking 7 років тому +78

    11th time WATCHING Black Books 🤣😁🤣

  • @clumsiii
    @clumsiii 4 роки тому +15

    He eats papadums without breaking them 14:38 as a yank this is hilarious and my countrypeople probably don't get it

  • @Marcus.Halberstram
    @Marcus.Halberstram Рік тому +3

    Well. Well. Well.
    What am I doing here? I ask you that! What's it all about? Any ideas?
    Ask yourself!
    Is this comment:
    A: Efficient?
    And
    B: Productive?
    Is this the best that we can be?
    Are we or are we not?
    A UA-cam comment section?

  • @because_the_internet
    @because_the_internet 2 роки тому +12

    Strict School Ma'am Fran is really making me feel some kind of way

  • @EmeraldLavigne
    @EmeraldLavigne 5 років тому +10

    Wait what happened to Fran's store?

  • @Yoctopory
    @Yoctopory Рік тому +3

    15:34 My theroy is that none of the board members know what they are doing at this company.

  • @sheenak3733
    @sheenak3733 4 роки тому +3

    Best show.

  • @TheMDJ2000
    @TheMDJ2000 3 роки тому +3

    Bonus for the use of "drongo".

  • @Demiglitch
    @Demiglitch 3 роки тому +8

    HOWS ELROY INVOLVED?

  • @susie9893
    @susie9893 3 роки тому +1

    That last scene - I'm dead

  • @FiftiesDad
    @FiftiesDad 3 роки тому +1

    i was at work the other day and i had been sitting for quite some time. finally got up and fixed myself and my pants and thought of the 6:30 guy.

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      if in doubt, imagine your boss standing there watching you.
      so: adjust your fleshy parts in the stalls, like the humans do.
      Not in full view of the entire office.
      We teach our daughters to act wit dignity, not to pee in the streets and not to adjust their knickers when standing among people..
      why do we forget to teach our sons the same basic decorum?

  • @maisam50
    @maisam50 Рік тому +2

    Best show ever maybe ...we all want to be Bernard

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      yeah... do we, though? it's a tad less funny for those of us who grew up with one or more parents who stemmed from the same hellhole that spawned him.. so: cherish the thought, just keep a firm grip on your inner Bernard at all times. Never let it run wild, unless it's a matter of life or death.

  • @SeanVigne
    @SeanVigne 3 роки тому +2

    "GET ON WITH IT!!!!"

  • @denisadenise9309
    @denisadenise9309 Рік тому

    Very simple and no mystery. 😊

  • @Ethan-0000
    @Ethan-0000 Рік тому +1

    Primo Black Books here

  • @eugenelennon2923
    @eugenelennon2923 3 роки тому +3

    Brilliant stuff.

  • @tubbsfarquhar4645
    @tubbsfarquhar4645 Рік тому

    18:32 always cracks me up

  • @eoghanlyng5074
    @eoghanlyng5074 6 років тому +6

    The finest episode of the lot.

    • @EW-cw4ib
      @EW-cw4ib 5 років тому +3

      Eoghan Lyng Nar grapes of wrath was

  • @tasosmob
    @tasosmob 4 роки тому +2

    "He won't, his ears are too small"...

  • @goldenretrievereatssh1t
    @goldenretrievereatssh1t Рік тому +2

    Out of all women Fran looks nice in a suit

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      anyone looks nice in a suit, that's the whole point of the stupid things..
      they literally have no other reason for existing, and are never worn for their protective or practical use, as they have none of those..

  • @denisadenise9309
    @denisadenise9309 Рік тому +1

    Are we, or are we not....a company?? 😅😊😅😊😅😂😂😂😂

  • @BinaryJoe
    @BinaryJoe Рік тому +1

    Rob Bryden, ladies and gents: he was doing Michael Caine. 😅

  • @RageMageD
    @RageMageD 5 років тому +2

    Thanks for uploading

  • @AK-ez4pc
    @AK-ez4pc 2 роки тому +1

    13:45 - ROFL

  • @So-Be-It_890
    @So-Be-It_890 6 місяців тому +1

    The Fixer

  • @katekato8132
    @katekato8132 4 роки тому +1

    15:14 exceptional

  • @Chuckingulrich
    @Chuckingulrich 6 років тому +14

    Jane has no thumbs 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @mhoney7899
    @mhoney7899 2 роки тому +1

    my earilest introduction to brilliant rob brydon until years later again on wilty

  • @kristynacuzova3387
    @kristynacuzova3387 7 років тому +5

    Brilliant

  • @ronpoguephotography1247
    @ronpoguephotography1247 6 років тому +15

    "too boaty"

  • @stevenaleshire7941
    @stevenaleshire7941 Рік тому

    This is great.

  • @newwavex8665
    @newwavex8665 4 роки тому +1

    Hahaha he read the first line from Pride and Prejudice

  • @SeaBee72
    @SeaBee72 6 років тому +12

    If I remember right, brown bread means dead, boat (race) means face but what does Harry stand for in Cockney rhyming slang?

    • @AndrewMottershead
      @AndrewMottershead 6 років тому +15

      spread your man muck on someone's face. Comes from the rhyming slang for Spunk (Harry Monk) on the Face (Boat Race). Urban dictionary

  • @thepayne7862
    @thepayne7862 4 роки тому +1

    I never knew the actor that played Danny was the voice actor for Yagnus in Dragon Quest VIII.

  • @eugenelennon2923
    @eugenelennon2923 3 роки тому +2

    Insane.

  • @katherenewedic8076
    @katherenewedic8076 9 місяців тому +1

    what happened to fran's shop?

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      Goliath Books took it over, didn't they? Fran's shop used to be next door..

  • @anydaynow
    @anydaynow 5 років тому +1

    Nice circle.

  • @Anarchypang
    @Anarchypang 4 роки тому +2

    !!!!!EXACTLY!!!!!!

  • @nostalgiaof98
    @nostalgiaof98 22 дні тому

    4:51

  • @danielcropp8553
    @danielcropp8553 5 років тому +5

    Rob Brydon!

    • @censusgary
      @censusgary 5 років тому +2

      Daniel Cropp : More recently the host of “Would I Lie To You?”

    • @swine13
      @swine13 4 роки тому

      @@censusgary when I watch WILTY, all I see is this episode and him going NOOOOOOO
      When I watch this, all I see is him there with David and Lee trying to decide if Lee once ran a 100m sprint with a goldfish in his mouth or not

  • @EvevanKaat
    @EvevanKaat 5 років тому +1

    I'm 83% sure this is my favourite episode

    • @a.tanner8524
      @a.tanner8524 4 роки тому +4

      I’m 17% sure it might not be.

    • @gerrita4924
      @gerrita4924 Рік тому +1

      I'm 100% sure you are right

  • @frozenhorse8695
    @frozenhorse8695 4 роки тому +10

    Unfortunately i can't give you my thumbs up on this episode.

    • @parthnigam916
      @parthnigam916 4 роки тому

      ?

    • @frozenhorse8695
      @frozenhorse8695 4 роки тому +4

      @@parthnigam916 If you watch the episode again, you'll know what i mean.

    • @tusharjain1801
      @tusharjain1801 4 роки тому

      Why?

    • @frozenhorse8695
      @frozenhorse8695 4 роки тому +3

      Well if i tell you it's a joke would that help at all.

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      @@parthnigam916 ..because of the 'thumbs being chopped off' being a running gag in this episode..?

  • @j.b.booker7912
    @j.b.booker7912 6 років тому +17

    Her tongue is crazy long

  • @keithleeuwen877
    @keithleeuwen877 6 років тому

    Great !

  • @flounder2283
    @flounder2283 2 місяці тому +1

    Kamala Harris must feel like Fran.

  • @LemonCurry.
    @LemonCurry. 6 років тому +4

    but why Jane Austen at the end?

    • @oliverholmes-gunning5372
      @oliverholmes-gunning5372 6 років тому +26

      Presumably the joke being that a big tough gangster is reading 18th century romance novels. Also, a Cockney Pride and Predjudice audiobook would be quite an amusing concept, I suppose...

    • @swine13
      @swine13 4 роки тому +3

      @@oliverholmes-gunning5372 cockney versions of most classic tales would be pretty great
      "'arry Po' 'er and the chamber o' geezers"

    • @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970
      @esmeraldaweatherwaxe970 15 днів тому

      maybe because it is the one most recognisable line in the world? and Jane Austen is the furthest thing from anyone's mind when considering a Cockney gangster reading anything aloud? ..does it even matter?

  • @eugenelennon2923
    @eugenelennon2923 3 роки тому +1

    Father Ted......this way. WAY BETTER!!!

  • @fluffin4bean
    @fluffin4bean Рік тому

    Rob Brydon is.

  • @eugenelennon2923
    @eugenelennon2923 3 роки тому

    Very funny....???

  • @eleSDSU
    @eleSDSU 2 роки тому

    Except for the slurs a great episode.

  • @winonafrog
    @winonafrog 3 місяці тому

    This show is complete garbage…🤦🏻‍♀️🙄; Fran is beautiful.

  • @marciwyrd8905
    @marciwyrd8905 3 роки тому

    I realize this is a British tv show and I probably won't get much in way of answer asking here.
    That aside, considering the racial tension in the US (and probably everywhere else in the world soon because Hollywood is the Kraken)
    Would dumb white farmer guy and that black dude from the ghetto be a good watch?
    I feel like it would be a great conversation. If anybody thinks it's a good idea and has the resources feel free, but genuinely unscripted, like all the racist tension is still there from both sides.
    Hard to explain in comments but neither are racist they just have their own stereotypes about the other.
    If you think black people can't be racist because they aren't in power, ask yourself 3 things. 1:how does Africa work? 2: what are statistics, 3:why are modern white people arguing with numbers and old white people argued with skeletons and fistfights.
    That last part was kind of a joke because I'm drunk, but fuckin....

    • @pia91
      @pia91 3 роки тому +3

      Bruh, lay off the meth

    • @marciwyrd8905
      @marciwyrd8905 3 роки тому

      @@pia91 i don't do meth, was just drunk.