What? Which IQ test is that that provides 4 sub-categories? The current up to date theoretical model provides like 17 sub- cognitive abilities beyond general IQ
does not explain why I have your song stuck in my head for the last 14 years or so but can't figure out division (which one goes where ?? up or under????)
Dude, you had me until "if you're a worthy person you'll figure out how to deal with it" - that crushes the souls of adhd people who are already dealing with more mental overhead to get through the day.
Or psychologists who tell you, "Well, just do it." Dude, that's the very reason I'm on _your couch_ , because I lack the gd _motivation_ to "just do it!" That psychologist just did not get me or it, so I moved on... Be well.
Agreed , I find some of Dr Barkley’s information so helpful but you have to extract the gems from a sea of harsh judgement and highly unpleasant delivery that’s like a cross between being yelled at by a parent or scolded by a work superior. I barely made it through this video
He does not mean “just do it and pretend to be neurotypical and feel bad about yourself more for failing to attain that standard” he means accept and acknowledge that you have ADHD, but do not see it as a terminal illness, instead learn and implement tools to live well with this disorder.
Look, ADHD can be challenging, but understanding it as an explanation rather than an excuse can really empower you! Dr. Barkley would agree that once you’re aware of ADHD’s impacts, it’s on you to dig into the strategies and structures that can help manage it. That means owning it, staying informed about the disorder, and working with experts who can offer individualized medication and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Success here isn’t about having solutions drop from the sky; it’s about digging in and committing to self-improvement. And in my experience, if you’re struggling with motivation-often a clear sign of dopamine-related issues-finding the right psychiatrist and focusing on medication should be your first priority. The right meds can make a huge difference, helping you establish a foundation of focus and motivation so that other strategies, like therapy and structure, actually stick. I know the “if you’re a worthy person” part hit a nerve, but it’s worth considering as motivation. By facing ADHD head-on and fully owning your role in managing it, you can take control over your life and show that, even with the disorder, you’re more than capable of building a fulfilling, productive life
hello! i know this isn't related to this video in particular but i wanted to say how grateful i am for all of the work you have done! i found out about you just a few hours ago and i want to cry my eyes out out of happiness, i was diagnosed adhd almost two years ago after it almost completely destroyed my life, now i'm on the journey of owning my adhd and acepting what i can do with it... either way, thank your for sharing all of the information and for making it accesible for people who are across the seas 💗 lots of love from Argentina! you got yourself a new fan over here ❤️ thank you so much for everything you have done
Leo U have lots of homies in the world. I'm in USA. My story is a lot like yours and through Dr. Barkley's work I'm finding ways to live a better life. Remember that we have compensating qualities - like our creativity, and we are really fun people that put the sparkle in parties. 😊 Join the club. ❤
Hi Moose... Good boy! The deficit in motivation / activation is, for me, more of a problem than distractibility. I completely subscribe to the "it's an explanation and not an excuse" line.
I don't understand how to bootstrap this stuff. Like on an intellectual level I figured all these things out at some point but that doesn't make them happen for the same reason every other plan, need or goal in my life never happened. And like you said, people just see it as a personality defect, a lack of integrity or something. The weight of shame and rejection rivals the weight of everything left undone.
Find and ADHD coach to help with implementing the things you know and to help wite the shame.
Місяць тому
You don't understand it because it's not physically possible to bootstrap yourself. All of these tips to "fuel up" are just attempts to gaslight you into thinking that you are somehow responsible for chemicals in your brain that determine your behavior. Don't feel bad, you can't help it.
My ADHD is so severe that I only clicked this video and could not go pass 10 seconds while having many tabs opened and experiencing time dilation without accomplishing anything at all for hours. I was doom scrolling for 30 minutes reading the comments in all the tabs.
But for me, I certainly have long term motivational goals, and I intellectually understand what microsteps I would take to achieve them, but: there is almost always a black hole between thinking and doing. I can barely explain how this black hole fels like, but I remember telling people when younger about my lofty plans, and they asking: "Well, what are you doing to try to achieve them?" and I would answer: "Uh... Nothing." and they would say: "Why?" and I would say: "I... I honestly don't know." and they would respond: "I guess you are just not motivated enough then, huh?" But that was usually not the actual case: it was not a lack of motivation, it was just a black hole between thinking and doing, that I never saw other people my age struggle with to nearly the same degree. But now when older, it is even worse, as doing a relatively simple task can be a hugely organisationally demanding event for me, so now by age 25 it really feels like my brain has learnt to send me the signal: "Trying is not even worth it." (well, it feels like my brain learnt that fairly early, but it gets more entrenched in to my psyche with age). So actually doing the first step, for example figuring out what I am even supposed to study for this module, is such a demanding task to do in a time efficient manner that it almost feels like I am about to run a marathon, both in mental energy spent and in anticipatory anxiety. Basically, it feels like I have taught myself that there is no point in actioning on my motivation, since I will just fail before I even start, rather than lacking motivation in the first place. As I have gotten older I have made myself extremely anxious about it. Just THINKING about a relatively simple task like figuring out how to clean my room fills me with anxiety and dread, since I know how horrible I am at it, and the anxiety in turn makes me want to avoid activities which makes me anxious, which I am already failing to do due to the ADD, going in to a really bad feedback loop, and that is not exactly conducive to acting on motivation. Sorry if this is ranting and kind of incoherent, but I guess being unstructured is par for the course for us haha!
I can't believe how exactly and with such fitting words (black hole) you describe "my" situation. Also the dread even jsut thinking about or trying to motivate myself doing a minor task is exactly what I experience on a daily basis, more or less all day long, most of the time not being able to accomplish anything. I'm wasting away while feeling totally high on motivation, ideas and drive, but I can't put it into action. I hate my life so much and I find there seems to be nothing I can do about it, since ofcourse I tried everything I can think of, from punishment to "self-blackmailing" to rewards, samller tasks, ... you name it. There is just almost always this black hole as you say. I often say it's as if my motor is running on the highest rpm close to the rev limiter but I just can't find any traction or as if there is no clutch. This video really made me think. I do not know if I have ADHD, there are/might be other mental health issues I struggle with and so many things of ADHD do not seem to fit, since I am in general more of a non impulsive controlled person. I just don't know what's going wrong and I'm not sure if I even understand this video. Just as you said, it seems so odd people should only be able to be motivated by goals some months in advance. I mean: How would someone ever be able to save for a house, loose weight, or similar, if their motivation would only reach that far? Also I'm pretty sure even as a child I had longterm goals far beyond those few days or hours stated. I always was good at waiting or postponing a reward for a bigger / another one. So now I am thinking about whether there is something else to the term motivation and if it might be that people really do not have to use that much willpower to accomplish their things in the given timeframe. This idea is so confusing. I can't think of anything I wouldn't use mor or less sheer willpower to di it, or at least start it. I think I might have gotten the whole concept of motivation wrong. FOr me motivation is an idea and kind of an urge to do something, not really the train/flow of movement to do it. As you said it is so hard to describe. I'm really confused now but glad, that there is at least one person who seems to experience the same, although ofcourse I wouldn't whish this to anybody.
This is the main thing about ADHD, too. If you've watched his other videos, he has one on this exact subject. Performance vs. Knowledge. We know what we need to do, but we can't...just do it.
@@ignoreme1141 Not exactly, it gets better with maturity but not perfect (but as I mentioned it can also get worse due to secondary effect entrenchment). Sleep well, train hard, try to establish routines of stability: try to outsource executive function to your routines as much as possible. Try as best you can find to find and cultivate mindsets which work against the ADHD which are not dependant on high levels of stress; WAY easier said than done though. But I do find that trying to be relaxed internally, almost meditative, can work, but it is HARD to consistently do it. Pumping myself up with stress works in the short run, and is easier to access, but it ruins you in the long run, and becomes positively counter-productive. It isn't easy because there is a huge catch 22 ADHD, but what can one do? Hopefully medication will help me in the future.
Thank you!! I have known I have ADHD since 1982. I have 3 teenage daughters - one with ADHD. I have my masters degree and, 2 weeks ago, dropped my ADHD teen off at a named University with a huge scholarship in her pocket. My mom taught me the term ""Compensating Skills" and I have taught it to my daughter. (you used it here). One reason I find your channel so helpful is because you are telling me what, exactly the problem is using peer reviewed research so I know it's trustworthy. Once I understand WHAT the problem is, I can figure out ways to compensate. My ADHD daughter is in the process of learning how to do the same thing without my help now. I really wish insurance covered executive functioning coaches in college. It would provide a level of scaffolding that I can't because I'm mom. Actual working won't be a problem but college hits right where ADHDers are weakest. With regulating their sense of time. BTW - the most valuable information you shared was that ADHD is a regulation disorder - not an attention disorder. The problem is regulating a person's attention, emotions, their sense of time, their motivation, their reaction to criticism, activity level, - all of it. It's too much or too little and it's by using compensating skills (timers calendars, external reminders, annoying ourselves etc) that allow us to function.
Because learning how to motivate yourself, can take sometime, and the objective of treatment is to improve your quality of life while you are learning to understand your brain, and building your own hacks, although in theory, treatment for adhd, can help with that.
I have NEVER heard anything that remotely comes close to explaining ME than this video. Thank you,.Dr, from the bottom of my heart. This has explained EVERYTHING I simply cannot put into words. ❤
Simply the fact that you took the time to fulfill a request fills me with joy! You have a great way of explaining things that we might not be able to organize and reproduce easily in our own.
Thank you so much for this, sir! It helps to understand WHY it’s so difficult to get/stay motivated, particularly with regards to personal goals, rather than job related ones.
Thank you so much, Dr. Barkley! It's humbling to see the lack of future orientation written out like that and encouraging to know that 1. it's not a personal failing that my brain works this way, and 2. there are interventions that are proven to help get my brain back on track.
Thank you Dr. Barkley for setting up a UA-cam channel with all your priceless knowledge. I've been consuming your lectures, interviews, book and you have been the source of eye-opening information and explanations for me. I also want to take the opportunity to say that watching your older lectures were not only extremely valuable but very funny too. You could do stand-up comedy and fill up theaters of ADHDers !! I'm a 52 (female) officially diagnosed 3 years ago but investigating on my own for the last 10. I've been doing group BT and this helped a lot with identifying that I was not a lazy, My major issues are inconsistency, time blindness -where I hyperfocus on watching UA-cam for hours to acquire MORE knowledge on ....well...everything, on what now seems my way on trying to crack my brain. It's like I'm searching for the next video that will be better explained or understood because I forget the 95% of what I just watched, read, listened to. - Then my brain is overwhelmed with do-lists that I can never put into the right order, I cannot focus, I'm easily distracted by all the post-it sticky notes that I have on my desk and cannot even prioritise them, and at the end of the day I end up having done 1-2 things that could have been done in 10 minutes. My doctor didn't want to give me stimulants due to my mothers bipolar disorder (for the fear of some kind of worst disregulation?) and my premenopausal /hormonal situation that might be causing my memory/brain fog lack of motivation and energy to feel worse. Do you think I should ask for a new visit ? I'd love to try some meds. Thank you again
Thanks! I am glad you are finding this so informative. I would speak to your doctor again as I know of know evidence where use of prescription stimulants is likely to provoke bipolar manic episodes. It would be quite rare. Even if you had bipolar, expert psychopharmacologists I know would still treat the ADHD with meds assuming that the bipolar disorder was stabilized. Be well,
Hello, friend. At 73, I found this presentation a breath of fresh air and life-affirming. So many plans, so few accomplishments... At least I have an explanation. It's like the old joke about women "having to be twice as good as men." I felt I had to give it three, four times the effort as that of a "normal" person just to get to that finish line... The stress was killing me and led me to opt for early retirement. When one is young one overcompensates, with age, well.... Be well.
To add to my other comment, I've never really thought about time preference as you've laid it out, partly I think because it *requires* time to think it through.... but you've hit the nail on the head; I have ADHD and my entire life seems to be lived in RAM like a computer, it's the 'what's going on right now' that matters to my brain, it's incredibly dynamic every single day. People with ADHD always have long term goals, they just never really make meaningful progress on them because something else comes up and becomes the 'new thing'. I'm lucky I have a supportive and loving wife who gets it. Two of my kids have ADHD (I was diagnosed in the last couple of years), but I'm at least thankful they know what they have and can work from that foundation, rather than waiting 40 years to find out and start getting things on track. Informative video :)
I remember seeing this in a larger lecture and it made so much more sense of my choices throughout my life. Really helpful having it in a shorter form to share! Just knowing about it is helpful, it also means you can put in your supports and accommodations to account for it because you’re then addressing the right problem.
Wow, the info about time and gratification was spot on! I was diagnosed a few years ago at fifty and have virtually no external control over this. My life has always been a mess and out of control. While it frustrated me to some extent, the eternal living in the moment component always made me think everything is fine, all the while not noticing the future ship was sinking. Living in the moment isnt really bad but I get depressed when I think of all the failures it has caused. Meds worked wonderfully for the first two on your list but here in canada we have doctor shortage and they wont prescribe it over the phone, so going without again and back to trying to learn more about it. Appreciate your channel because its not all about pull up your socks, stop being lazy etc. Or an overachiever with mild ADHD giving advice, not that some of their material isnt good but some of us are at baby steps while they are taking giant leaps. Thank you.
Thanks doc, that clears up some worries i had. knew most of these tricks, but it is hard to implement it into our lives. hope everyone who have been feeling low, self-doubting, guilty find a way
I’m 60 and just find out I have adhd. I knew something was not right but was always going after the depression problems. I Took a on line test and checked all the boxes. I can’t tell you the mixed feelings I had. I did get tested and was diagnosed. I’m on stimulates and this is like opening the shades of the world. I Would like to know how I can get into a group to help me move forward. My therapist is real busy and hard to get appointments with her. A direction would help. Thanks for showing us who we are as we seem to have blinders on.
my partner got diagnosed with adhd at 60, same as you. we have kind of the same problem as in how to move forward. i suggested starting with joining facebook/instagram groups like ADDitude or for us here ADHD IRELAND. connecting with people who have same often seems helpful,because at least one doesn t feel so alone. the other thing to do is keep watching adhd related youtubes, asking your general doctor for CBT certified therapists maybe ,instead of relying o just the one you know. the waiting period between diagnose and actual help can be a nightmare,and it feels as if no one is there to help,but remember...baby steps. EVERY little step brings you a little further towards the light at the end of the tunnel❤ also, we find it helpful to bridge the "horrible long-term wait with no gratification" with a huge sense of humour,joking together about being stuck momentarily , sometimes we even play a game..." if you were stuck in a hole 12 feet deep with mud around you, how would you get out?"...the funniest ideas are coming up and we end up laughing so hard,it literally takes away the "doom" mood. i wish you the best and can only say do not give up! ps...we are still waiting for professional help,on a "waiting list"..🙈 bless you🙏
Thank you. This video is like balm to my soul. I have beat myself up for more years than I care to count for my lack of self-discipline (and lived with depression since my teens). I only realised I might have ADHD relatively recently - I haven't sought out assessment yet because if I'm told I don't have it I feel that it would crush me. I do have most of the symptoms. And thinking of it as a neurobioligical disorder is helping me accept myself and find strategies to work around me executive function deficits. Thank you again.
So how did it go? I'm an adult but I'm so tempted to share this because my Dad doesn't understand why it's so hard to keep things clean. He thinks it's a phone addiction or computer addiction. Did your parents understand? Did they have a light bulb moment?
I'm 29 now (female), unmedicated and have struggled with this stuff all my life. Was diagnosed with 10 due to always having emotional issues, being bullied since kindergarten and later on in my teens barely being able to function in a school setting without getting into trouble or people bringing trouble to me (teachers included). It's so wild to me how other people without ADHD don't have much or any of this, let alone to a debilitating impairing extent. I really hope the German health system will allow me to get medicated soon. Found my ADHD diagnosis again 3-5 years ago or smth and I'm glad I can receive help (when/if I ever get meds or even a psychiatrist since everything's full since, well, years, ugh). Like others have already said here and below other videos; thank you so much for educating people here on YT as well and uploading new stuff. It's really much appreciated! :)
ya germany isnt fun, nor is adhd, but we do have abilities that ppl without adhd dont have like being a thuinktank nad comming up with lots of solutions fast and then also troubleshooting them in our heads. it would take at least like 3-5 people a whole week to brainstorm what we can in half an hour so if i had a choise to be "normal" or keep my adhd brain, i would keep what i have
Hey there! @chizuru94 i'm salah, i'm 27 a phisician, with adhd seit 2 years ago. I live in algeria and i'm planning to move to germany in about 6 months. for instance i take atomoxetine ( the only medication available here) and it isn't really helping me, can i get a proper medication once there (in germany) since you said you hope the German health system will allow you to get medicated. is it not recognized there? is the amphetamines available in germany? thank you for tanking the time to read my comment. ❤
Thank you for this video.i was searching for the ways to motivate myself to get my study done which is due in 90 days approx. I would incooperate this tips for next 3 months until im done with my competitive exams. Thank you for all that youre doing. I appreciate every bit of your efforts. Im myself a med student. And i cannot rap around the thoughtoff blindedness for adhd in psychiatrist in india. I have visited 2 doctors and both refised to medicate me. Thank you for the lifestyle tips. I would come back and tell you my results which will be due in mid november. 😊 You are like guiding light in the darkness for me. Thanks for everything!
I find the point with telling others of your plans to motivate you quite interesting. I tried that like a million times and it always failed. I do adhere to my plans if I don't talk about them more often. I feel like my brain thinks talking about something is the same as doing and achieving that thing. So stupid tbh.
@@erwvhkasdkvhsdjajsdhcadsh9055 I join both of you. I entered that same mentally soothing rabbit hole of imagining accomplishment and feeling the satisfaction of getting it done. Sadly, it satisfies _me_ but brought no project into the world for others to enjoy. I got solace and a perverse satisfaction from the fact that my fantasies did not involve extracting resources nor polluting the planet nor exploiting others. A harmless narcissism, I suppose. Be well.
Are you talking about when you talk to yourself to self motivate? I do it and it pushes me forward when I can’t find external motivation. I’ve learned that I’ve got to work on myself and stop pleasing others before me. In my head I use the lifesaving techniques-put your mask in first and then you can help the person next to you.
Thank you for all you do for people with ADHD and those who love us. You have been such an important source of research-based information for me and I'm sure for hundreds of thousands of others. I can't put into words how grateful I am for your immense contribution in the world of ADHD research and the dissemination of all the knowledge you have acquired on the topic. You have had a huge positive influence on so many people's lives. Thank you. 🙏
@ hey Ive had 3 businesses, built and sold each. The ONLY way each one was able to suceed was when or after I found a partner. I LITERALLY gave one friend half the equity just to come work with me. By having just 1 person Im responsible to do my part for as a partner I work and get things done like no one anyone has seen. Left alone to just myself as the only benefactor, I almost could care less. The partner doesnt even have to be great, and I dont do less if we arent getting along. Im 100% if someone else would be cheated by me not doing my part. Im 2 % if its just me.
@@ScottPBrown thank you for the insight! I am doing the same right now, not with friend but worker from my previous project. The problem is, he is junior I am senior and he waits for me to guide and inspire him. And I tend to only do that as my work day and not do any of the other work, feeling satisfied that I’ve done management that day. Some days we just talk online about progress and I do nothing else in a day. I’m afraid he may see through it, that I don’t do much, and be losing interest because of that.
@@ScottPBrowni am this way. I seem to be a lot more motivated in a team setting where each of us can contribute our part of the total mission to reach the same goal. My problem is I seeking the motivation from others and not just me being the only person responsible for its success or failure. Finding someone else who I can “hold my hand” through the process that I can truly trust is the difficult part. I can’t be lead blindly without knowing the ins and outs. There’s plus and minuses to that as well so ultimately everything gives me anxieties and it’s easier to play dumb. I have a LOT of integrity so I would never purposely cheat someone out if I HAD a business or even get one started.
@@rebeccaherrera6006 it's just something about having one other person around but to be casually accountable to. Either that or probably like we all are, subjects of intense interest im all in. Deep. If it is not stimulating, I can still manage, but struggle to get energized.
I must admit, I rewound this and most UA-cam info videos, at least 8-10 times as my listening brain "drifts." Worse with textbooks, sometimes I'll re-read the same sentence 4-5 times! Drives me batty... Be well.
Thank you so much doctor! I desperately needed this. Currently medical student and preparing for entrance exam for postgraduate course and i find it difficult to accomplish long term preparation goals.😢 Thought i lack motivation and am ungrateful for my parents sacrifice for my studies.
Hey Sir, thanks for putting all this content over here on UA-cam. This will help me immensely in my journey through my recently diagnosed ADHD (in my mid-40s). Thanks, I have no words to express how immensely generous and welcome this is. Thank you. I'll be watching your videos for a while, I guess.
7:42 Funny it is like that for people. For me, some past experiences or even the next class I am or would be heading to felt like smth new every time that I couldn't see coming or smth like that. And people were - understandably so, I guess - confused why I still didn't know what to do and to bring etc. every time/every class, sometimes. Oh, what I'd give to live like someone without ADHD for a week or smth :') I can just hope medication might give me even a glimpse of that. I already had 29 years of pain and suffering due to this disorder :(
Thank you for this presentation Dr Barkley. I truly appreciate all your efforts and the content you make available. I just got diagnosed last month because I started to feel like I was struggling to stay focused while studying even though I thought the content I wasn't that difficult. My math skills are quite good so that's been carrying me in my Electrical Engineering program but the theoretical parts are really hard for me. I just thought it was my anxiety keeping me from focusing then I went for an assessment and the psycholgist and explained that my working memory was abysmal but mostly everything was above average. I started taking my 18mg of Concerta last week and wow what a game changer, especially the first three days. I was so calm and my anxiety disappeared. I felt very robotic, I did not smile or laugh as much as I regularly do which was actually nice. It made me think maybe I laughed too much because I was always anxious. At work I wasn't frantic, and I was moving so efficiently throughout the day. I felt extremely motivated and I wasn't having to convince myself to do things like clean the bathroom or do the laundry or wash the dishes. I just thought it and did it. I did notice though that the Concerta only lasted about 7 hrs the first and second day. It's only been lasting about 5 hours or less in the second week and sometimes I can't notice if it's working. The random songs and fake scenarios and just popping into my head again but when I become aware of it, they just go away now. Gonna see my GP next week to see about the dosage.
This explanation was so easy to understand, thank you! I would love another video if you could go more in-depth on ADHD and how it can combine with autism, as I feel that some of the resources recommended here aren't as applicable to auDHD folks (like taking 10 minute breaks between tasks, if I take a break it's much too hard for me to pull out of the task overwhelm slump, I need to focus in and not stop until I've completed my project)
I needed this one today! No disrespect intended that I refer to you as “our Russell” in my therapy sessions! God blessed me to choose a therapist who specializes (and has!) ADHD. She diagnosed me as I turned 55. I’ve had it all my life but became completely unmanageable when I hit a period of too much stress and menopause. I’m struggling to do the things I need to do and she holds space for me, defends me and yes, challenges me. Your comment about not using as an excuse and you need to figure out a way to do “it” hit the nail on the head. Currently unmedicated for multiple reasons, but will re-address with PCP this week after having the GeneSight test (irony that after 3 months of crazy side effects on Strattera, it showed up in red 😁) Thank you so much for your love of this subject and your continued research and sharing! We love you!!! ❤️
The ADHD is not an excuse but an explanation is very enlightening. I’ve been following Dr. Barkley for more than 10 years and it really has helped me to know much more about the whys of how In am. I was diagnosed with ADHD in Japan, when I was 32. I’m 43 now and been living in Japan since I was 19. Japan is a society that won’t accept any excuses, even if they are real. Yes, there might have been a train accident and you were late but that is not excuse. Let alone saying you have ADHD, they won’t waste their time trying to understand something they don’t see and have no reason to. By itself it is a very hostile society when it comes to LDs. Emphasizing that you are a failure and that’s it just blows away all your self-esteem to a point that is so devastating that you eventually believe it and you end up feeling pity for yourself, play the “ADHD excuse” as self-preservation and convince yourself it is indeed true. Eventually you go down the rabbit hole of depression, substance abuse, isolation. So shall be this a reminder that there’s no excuse and I must fix this somehow. About substance abuse, drugs are just a no-no here, just testing positive would ban me from being in Japan forever and lose everything I have, my wife, daughter. But alcohol was an issue. I was drinking specially when I was bored and I was doing it while watching Netflix. Then I quit cold torquey a year ago. Didn’t struggle at all, I don’t know why. Please don’t do it like I did, it’s like playing with fire. I just realized about that now. Wow… So yes, it’s time to use ADHD as an excuse. The other one that really is an excuse and very devastating having severe protanopia. So being color blind and having ADHD together is a whole different story.
I find one thing that really helps with learning for the future is setting a very appealing (and likely unrealistic end goal) one that sounds so juicy I can't help but make small adjustments to get there overtime.
I showed it to my boyfriend 💜thank you so much. He finally understood some things and I hope will stop calling himself and me lazy. Hate that word. I don't make alarms because I'm lazy, but bcs of executive dysfunction and this is one of many coping skills that help. I need an accountability person near me while I clean, bcs without buddy doubling it's too hard. But I get it done, jzst my way
I'm sorry I'm so late, but wow holy crap this is right! I thought that having an accountability buddy helping you get chores(or almost anything else) done meant you were becoming dependent on them to help you function, and I was worried about that! But then I remeber I'm Adhd and this is a huge coping thing. Like I don't even *want* to make a meal without my partner being there, even if I'm feeling like a bottomless pit. My partner doesn't seem to understand that I literally need him to help me out with things so I can be motivated. Then again....maybe I need to explain that to him🤨🧐
Dr. Barkley, thank you for your ongoing work to clarify ADHD's impact. I’ve read that ADHD is significantly more prevalent in incarcerated populations compared to the general public. Could you elaborate on the factors that might contribute to this? Specifically, how might challenges like impulsivity, emotional regulation, and executive functioning issues increase the risk of involvement with the justice system? And what role do social factors, like family instability or lack of early diagnosis, play in this context? Thank you for your insight on this important issue.
I really enjoyed this video Dr Barkley. Some great & practical tips for replenishing the EF tank. Regarding the 'take frequent break' strategy; what would you reply to clients that say something like 'if I take a break I won't want to go back to it.'
Thanks. That is certainly a possibility with frequent breaks but can also happen even without them. Re engaging tasks after a break can be a challenge but we found that when adults had longer tasks to do, breaking them down into smaller chunks seemed less overwhelming to do. Be well
I have always had problems in my life with time management. I considered myself time colorblind, unable to understand whether an activity would require 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 1 month, 6 months to be carried out. I spent years dealing with this in therapy. Apart from several other issues of energy spikes, and other moments without energy to keep me going, lack of motivation. I never thought about ADHD. Until I went to a doctor who alerted me to this possibility. I didn't accept it, I went to someone else who told me the same thing. I was diagnosed recently. I'm still in the acceptance phase
Thanks for viewing my work. I have visited your country several times, even back when it was the Soviet Union, and again after that and loved the people and country. It's a shame our governments demonize each other when our people and what they value are so similar. I wish you well in finding help there.
I’ve heard to watch out for periods of hyper focus on partner and then disinterest. And then that disinterest leads to resentment if you view them as interrupting you when you are hyper focusing on something else (isolating to dopamine chase).
@@RyanFurunessI think you unintentionally just helped me figure out why I’m so bad with relationships, that just made so much sense and everything just clicked, thank u! I will definitely be looking out for this in the future now that I know what to look for exactly! Much appreciated
@@bansheewolfps4864 Definitely! I saw this on reddit one time and saw how important it was and have tried to remember and spread it since. People with ADHD need to know how it affects this area of their life
@RyanFuruness this is me during reading! If I'm reading (or even listening to an audio book) and I get interrupted: I'm am so close to exploding on you and tearing you a new one.
@@RyanFuruness Agree. I was raised with four sisters and did not want to end up as a heartbreaking SOB. I stumbled into the strategy of prompting girlfriends who wanted to "take it to the next level" initiate the break. I knew the relationship would not work in the long term due to my ADHD lifestyle complications, i.e. lack of follow through in academics and professional life, which would mean wedded to a failure... I feigned distancing, other plans, inconsiderateness, selfishness, etc. They eventually got sick of me and "dumped" me. What a relief. I knew or suspected that if I was incapable of long-term goals, I was incapable of long-term (life time) commitment. I misfired once and one of them hates me or so her relative later told me. I felt really, really bad when I heard this unpleasant news. Be well.
You have a dog and he's not a Russell Terrier called 'Barkley'???? For shame! For real though, Moose is ridiculously cute ❤ Edit: This is the perfect video to show my family and friends!
I usually talk to myself when alone has if I where speaking to a different part of me, really helps to put into conciousness the tasks and causes of events to then write down solutions and time frames. Hope this helps someone.
Three things I find that are really helpful for me (I do not medicate for my ADHD), are 1) regular exercise that gets my heart rate up, 2) lowered sugar in my diet and 3) writing things down, drawing or doodling while I'm thinking / processing (helps with visualising). I have a large family and a successful IT career, and over the years I have learned to compensate, purely by trial and error and having to as a necessity to survive.
Dr Russell, thank you so much for all the work you share, i have a question about adhd overlapped with traits of bpd and taking medication for both as in ssri in the evening and concerta in the morning. Of course prescribed by a psychiatrist. I would like to hear your opinion about the overlaping and medications.
Thank you, Dr Barkley, for these lectures and videos. As an adult with ADHD, I find this enlightening and so helpful. I wish all adults with ADHD and parents to ADHD children see this. I have a question. Do you maybe have books or videos translated to Hebrew? If it is possible to add Hebrew subtitles to your videos, I'd be happy to contribute.
Yes, and the time preference truncation is linked to the short term memory issue. We won't be able to "contain" by way of preparation for that time now so we will address it in our Now moment later when we can "contain" it.... it's a coping function of the short term memory challenges.
Dr. Barkley, I'm so glad you created a channel and are offering up these videos. I want to ask about the last part of the video where you discuss making ourselves accountable to others. With ADHD's high comorbidity with other disorders (eg anxiety/depression) how would you suggest we walk the fine line of holding ourselves accountable to others versus while not becoming "people pleasers"? Is the defining factor being a goal for ourselves rather than a goal for others? I know that can also be difficult to sort out in the immediate moment, but I personally feel like I blurred that line myself as I was growing up and that carried over into adulthood, eventually exacerbating my anxiety and depression to the point of burnout. I am working with a therapist to work on these issues, but I would love to hear your thoughts on how we can hold ourselves accountable while ensuring that we are working to be motivated towards *our* goals. Thank you!
Yes, it’s for your own personal or occupational goals or tasks primarily. And it should be arranged to be supportive an d motivating not judge mental. Be well.
Agree! Is people-pleasing a sociological and unwelcome "side-effect" of ADHD? One does not want to let people down. I still have regrets after 50 years that in some rather, now trivial circumstances, I did. Do not wish to alienate/disappoint people and feel I often overcompensate. Or is this my defensive narcissism talking? Be well.
I feel like my biggest over-arching issue with ADHD is the fact that I can't visualise 😮💨 I am a trained Illustrator but I can never envision an artwork before I create it. I honestly have no idea how I make anything. It feels like a massive struggle every time, and I don't have any say over whether a piece works out or not 😮💨 Yet I have an almost obsessive compulsion to create, not just artworks but jewellery, objects, anything that attracts my attention. And I do create them and people always love them and want me to make more but I can't sustain any consistency because nothing about the process feels linear! I'm just along for the ride and I have no idea if I'll be able to stay connected long enough to finish the thing 😬 I can't really see any pictures in my mind that I can pull up to encourage motivation to stay on task in work or in life in general. No visions of how the piece will end up looking, no visions of the desired outcome in terns of fulfilling a brief, and no visions of a career path! 🤦♀️ Is it possible to learn to visualise?? I currently rely on Pinterest etc and will be making some vision boards later this week but it really sucks to not be able to imagine something independently. I have no idea why I would have both the technical ability to create plus the compulsion to do so, but without the corresponding visualisation?
Are you on medication? I found adhd meds really hindered my ability to do this. Lots of lawyers will do some work on meds and more creative work off of meds. Hope this helps!
@@BobrLovr thanks for the response! No I'm not on meds, I'm always fearful of medication 😗 I have felt desperate enough to consider them especially recently, but I've also heard from others who say the meds further dampen creativity 🤔 Did you continue with the meds on the days when you didn't need to think creatively?
@leanneart as of recently I've began to experiment with taking creative days off. I'm a musician and I have been my whole life, but I completely quit all music when I started taking meds, it just no longer did anything for me.but luckily because of its short half life it's totally okay to just stop taking the meds and rest assured your normal self comes right back, for better or for worse . Medication helps a lot with paying attention, but I highly suggest going back and forth for maximum productivity.
Watching this a second time to really wrap my brain around it. I paused it on the slide of the 4 developmental transitions in control of behavior to think about this. The problem I have is with Time. I am famous for saying "in a minute" when what I really mean is in 30 minutes or more. At the same time I may be relating a story to someone as something that happened "the other day" but if I really stop and try to pin down when it happened (which is hard) it may have been a year or several years ago. For delayed gratification I am perfectly able to delay gratification. The problem arises in coming back to harvest the fruits of my delayed gratification. And gardening is a perfect example. I can grow peas from seed. I can nurture them in the early days. But at a certain point they don't need constant attention. Once I don't have to go out and care for them on a daily basis I may never come back to eat the peas I invested so much in at the start. Before I know it it's August and the peas are over grown and inedible. I try to be philosophical about it and think of how much my garden has contributed to the ecosystem if not to my larder. But part of me knows that if I delay self gratification I may never reap the rewards. So maybe the next time I think about growing peas I just shrug and tell myself I won't succeed and so therefore I should just buy a bag of peas for immediate gratification. So does a preference for immediate gratification maybe just come down to a learned behavior caused by a memory deficit?
That is a very interesting point because it's not clear about the chicken and egg here. Some people do describe the fact that by not being able to hold ideas in mind as well or as long as others, they opt to do things now or they will forget about them. So they seem impulsive and opt for the immediate reward because of a working memory problem. But then we also know that poor inhibition contributes to some extent to that kind of working memory problem, especially through being so distractible. So I think it's an interaction of the two more than just a simple one way explanation. Also, people vary markedly in their time preference, like on a bell shaped curve, and it seems to be related more to genetic and biological factors than social ones. Yet cultural and situational factors can affect time preference or choice behavior. So, it's complicated, but you raise an interesting possibility for some people. Thanks!
7:14 Nope. My sense of time never advanced normally. This illustration of how other people develop is so crazy. I can’t believe how different I am! I never knew!
Regarding 15:00 : Are there any tips on how one should do that, if medidation and "mindfulness" itself feels like something you need to force yourself to? I personally found that the act of letting my brain wander around or simply getting up and walking around helps myself way more than any other practice.
I think that the accommodations and coping strategies can be highly individualistic, as you noted and what works for some, such as mindfulness, won’t work for others. Be well.
The longer lecture with this slide is super helpful. Would you still consider glucose/blood sugar levels to be a major contributor to EF/motivation ability? I’m also curious if protein plays a role, since my understanding is that the amino acids from protein are what our brain uses to make dopamine and other neurotransmitters. Great video as always!
The work on blood glucose was done on typical people. Consuming small amounts over time did help them to sustain their EF on tasks. So when I suggested it I was extrapolating from that work in the book, Handbook of Self-Regulation by Kathleen Vows and Roy Baumeister. But since the work wasn't done with people with ADHD I needed to be careful about recommending it until such a study was done with ADHD specifically.
I'm always in the here and now. Currently in College. Meds allow me to sit through class without losing my sht or falling asleep 5 minutes in. But I do no assignments. 500 word essay was due last week lol. Time flys! Next thing I know its the next class. I'm literal out of sight out of mind lol. I need a daily schedule and routine let's go!!!
I have no time to leave my desk and its killing me. I struggle with time horizons too, I want dearly to quit my job; I will have no shame being poor as long as I don't have to sit in that chair chasing customers and expecting to know 8 different schedules going on. Then I get yelled at for hyper focussing on a task and not talking because I'm meant to be juggling other plates... I won't quit but its so draining having to rationalize to myself each time why it'd be a bad idea to quick now and torch my work history. I often think getting fired would be a blessing for my sanity.
Hi, I think if the task is simple or "rote" ... that little breaks are beneficial. But when I was working as an RN geriatric psychiatric clinician with frequent admisions, or an RN weekend evening supervisor in charge of a 60-bed convalescent center, both of which generated various types of emergencies .... uhh, no ... mental breaks were disruptive to keeping everything going in my head, re-prioritizing, shifting focus from patient care to family communications and education to staff needs and problems and back again. No, I stayed completely focused constantly. Maybe some others who don't have adhd can stop and start in such environments, but not me. I needed to maintain 100% focus for hours, just to perform as well as those without adhd. But often, I out-performed others due to more conscientious attention to all details. (Another thing .... in nursing school I "over-studied" in order to deeply embed the information in long term memory, to recall it very quickly, and that saved a lot of time and helped compensate for my adhd 👍)
I live in Japan, and a normal greeting would be to ask someone if they're "genki" or energetic. I always have deep thoughts whenever someone ask me this since I couldn't fathom why anyone would be energetic to go do their job. I'm only there to get paid, and the only day I'm a bit energetic is when it's payday. Videogames and hobbies however are the only times where I can truly feel motivated. If I play a game for hours without going out to pee or eat, I'll consider that a good day as a human. It's only when you deliberate that you need to work tomorrow that depression rises it's head. Without work I feel like I'm finally becoming a normal person.
I understand that instant reward issue with something so simple as my writing. I am more constant with fanfic writing because I post it chapter by chapter, but with the novel/book I'm writing the motivation is not as good because my reward will be meet in the longtime and not after finishing one chapter.
As I posted above, I need _serious_ help with this issue. Stuck writing (bad) poetry, letters to the editor and OpEds. These have their rewards but I consider them very confining. Be well.
It’s funny because ADHD also looks like it could be that somebody’s in a state of trauma or PTSD where they in their survival mode can only think more immediately than somebody who is in a non-stressed situation
Hence, the reason UA-cam hosts the "crappy childhood fairy" my other go-to on line counselor... Like Dr. Barkley she addresses PTSD/ADHD-like issues (i.e. Childhood Development Trauma) not recognized in the DSM-V! But nonetheless very _real symptoms_ continue to surface to disrupt one's sanity and mental well-being. Be well.
I am amazingly motivated to pursue my OWN goals and my OWN creativity. I just don't want to pursue what society wants me to pursue. If you stop trying to force kids to obey and conform you'll learn what ADHD really is. It's not a disorder. It's just an inability to fit into this messed up, backwards, harmful civilization. I am not "distracted", I just follow different routes and do what I want along the way. If you stop trying to force us into a box, we're much happier AND we do amazing things. Please study the social model of disability.
Agreed ADHD is only a problem if you want to be well integrated in modern society. If you qere totally self sufficient theb there will be no issues, your ducks and goats will tell you they need to be fed on time, so there is always external motivators
Hi Dr Barkley. Great video. Something that comes up in your videos is problem solving difficulties for ADHD patients. And I want to understand that more because I have always thought my greatest skill was problem solving. But maybe it is actually problem identification. How are great minds who most likely had ADHD like Steve Jobs able to problem solve and work on long term projects? Maybe he was just good at identifying the problem? But how do these CEOs with ADHD work on long term projects? Like the CEO of JetBlue? Would love to know more about link between ADHD and problem solving. Thank you!
@Osvath97 Thanks for putting words to my thoughts and actions. Also appreciate all the replies. I’m new to learning about ADHD but it’s been part of life since forever (I’m now 60) It’s comforting to know that it’s not “just me”.
sometimes my days feel like this: I'm a dog-walker responsible for, lets say, thirty dogs on leashes and I'm walking thru a rabbit farm. 😂 All kinds of dogs - large and small, starving and overweight, very energetic and totally sluggish - a few are dragging behind trying to potty, different pairs are fighting, some seem injured or sick, a few have slipped their collars and are running loose, and many leashes are tangled around my legs and arms. So...now I just need to choose what is most important to address first and break it down into a few steps and tell a friend for accountability and plan a reward for myself all the while keeping up some positive self-talk...got it 👍👏👏👏
Hi Dr. Barkley! Thank you for this great video. I have a specific video request: can you do a video on Alcohol an ADHD? Obviously alcohol must impair Executive function, but to what extent? Should ADHD individuals avoid alcohol moreso than regular people? Can ADHD people drink occasionally and suffer no further problems than regular people? I ask this partially because I feel that even small amounts of alcohol destroys the EF tank far more in ADHD people than in regular people. Yet, some people seem to get more work done with a small drink than they would otherwise.
This helps explain why my processing speed is 30th percentile on IQ tests and the other three categories are 99th percentile.
The actual one and only Mr Zonday, one of the UA-cam OGs. Finding a comment from you on this side of UA-cam is quite unexpected!
Chocolate Rain! Some Stay dry while others feel the Pain! Chocolate Rain!
What? Which IQ test is that that provides 4 sub-categories? The current up to date theoretical model provides like 17 sub- cognitive abilities beyond general IQ
@@williamhamilton5868 I looked it up, the WAIS III and IV does. No need to be rude also
does not explain why I have your song stuck in my head for the last 14 years or so but can't figure out division (which one goes where ?? up or under????)
Dude, you had me until "if you're a worthy person you'll figure out how to deal with it" - that crushes the souls of adhd people who are already dealing with more mental overhead to get through the day.
Don't get me wrong, I kept listening to see what you'd follow it up with, which is good stuff but damn that's harsh
Or psychologists who tell you, "Well, just do it." Dude, that's the very reason I'm on _your couch_ , because I lack the gd _motivation_ to "just do it!" That psychologist just did not get me or it, so I moved on...
Be well.
Agreed , I find some of Dr Barkley’s information so helpful but you have to extract the gems from a sea of harsh judgement and highly unpleasant delivery that’s like a cross between being yelled at by a parent or scolded by a work superior. I barely made it through this video
He does not mean “just do it and pretend to be neurotypical and feel bad about yourself more for failing to attain that standard” he means accept and acknowledge that you have ADHD, but do not see it as a terminal illness, instead learn and implement tools to live well with this disorder.
Look, ADHD can be challenging, but understanding it as an explanation rather than an excuse can really empower you! Dr. Barkley would agree that once you’re aware of ADHD’s impacts, it’s on you to dig into the strategies and structures that can help manage it. That means owning it, staying informed about the disorder, and working with experts who can offer individualized medication and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Success here isn’t about having solutions drop from the sky; it’s about digging in and committing to self-improvement.
And in my experience, if you’re struggling with motivation-often a clear sign of dopamine-related issues-finding the right psychiatrist and focusing on medication should be your first priority. The right meds can make a huge difference, helping you establish a foundation of focus and motivation so that other strategies, like therapy and structure, actually stick.
I know the “if you’re a worthy person” part hit a nerve, but it’s worth considering as motivation. By facing ADHD head-on and fully owning your role in managing it, you can take control over your life and show that, even with the disorder, you’re more than capable of building a fulfilling, productive life
hello! i know this isn't related to this video in particular but i wanted to say how grateful i am for all of the work you have done! i found out about you just a few hours ago and i want to cry my eyes out out of happiness, i was diagnosed adhd almost two years ago after it almost completely destroyed my life, now i'm on the journey of owning my adhd and acepting what i can do with it... either way, thank your for sharing all of the information and for making it accesible for people who are across the seas 💗 lots of love from Argentina! you got yourself a new fan over here ❤️ thank you so much for everything you have done
Thank you!
Focus now
Leo
U have lots of homies in the world. I'm in USA. My story is a lot like yours and through Dr. Barkley's work I'm finding ways to live a better life. Remember that we have compensating qualities - like our creativity, and we are really fun people that put the sparkle in parties. 😊 Join the club. ❤
Hi Moose... Good boy!
The deficit in motivation / activation is, for me, more of a problem than distractibility.
I completely subscribe to the "it's an explanation and not an excuse" line.
Moose says "hello" in his own way back at you. LOL
I don't understand how to bootstrap this stuff. Like on an intellectual level I figured all these things out at some point but that doesn't make them happen for the same reason every other plan, need or goal in my life never happened. And like you said, people just see it as a personality defect, a lack of integrity or something. The weight of shame and rejection rivals the weight of everything left undone.
If you get properly diagnosed with ADHD (not as easy to find a.skilled.doc.as.it.should be) meds could result in a big improvement.
Find and ADHD coach to help with implementing the things you know and to help wite the shame.
You don't understand it because it's not physically possible to bootstrap yourself. All of these tips to "fuel up" are just attempts to gaslight you into thinking that you are somehow responsible for chemicals in your brain that determine your behavior. Don't feel bad, you can't help it.
My ADHD is so severe that I only clicked this video and could not go pass 10 seconds while having many tabs opened and experiencing time dilation without accomplishing anything at all for hours. I was doom scrolling for 30 minutes reading the comments in all the tabs.
But for me, I certainly have long term motivational goals, and I intellectually understand what microsteps I would take to achieve them, but: there is almost always a black hole between thinking and doing. I can barely explain how this black hole fels like, but I remember telling people when younger about my lofty plans, and they asking: "Well, what are you doing to try to achieve them?" and I would answer: "Uh... Nothing." and they would say: "Why?" and I would say: "I... I honestly don't know." and they would respond: "I guess you are just not motivated enough then, huh?" But that was usually not the actual case: it was not a lack of motivation, it was just a black hole between thinking and doing, that I never saw other people my age struggle with to nearly the same degree.
But now when older, it is even worse, as doing a relatively simple task can be a hugely organisationally demanding event for me, so now by age 25 it really feels like my brain has learnt to send me the signal: "Trying is not even worth it." (well, it feels like my brain learnt that fairly early, but it gets more entrenched in to my psyche with age). So actually doing the first step, for example figuring out what I am even supposed to study for this module, is such a demanding task to do in a time efficient manner that it almost feels like I am about to run a marathon, both in mental energy spent and in anticipatory anxiety.
Basically, it feels like I have taught myself that there is no point in actioning on my motivation, since I will just fail before I even start, rather than lacking motivation in the first place. As I have gotten older I have made myself extremely anxious about it. Just THINKING about a relatively simple task like figuring out how to clean my room fills me with anxiety and dread, since I know how horrible I am at it, and the anxiety in turn makes me want to avoid activities which makes me anxious, which I am already failing to do due to the ADD, going in to a really bad feedback loop, and that is not exactly conducive to acting on motivation.
Sorry if this is ranting and kind of incoherent, but I guess being unstructured is par for the course for us haha!
I can't believe how exactly and with such fitting words (black hole) you describe "my" situation. Also the dread even jsut thinking about or trying to motivate myself doing a minor task is exactly what I experience on a daily basis, more or less all day long, most of the time not being able to accomplish anything. I'm wasting away while feeling totally high on motivation, ideas and drive, but I can't put it into action. I hate my life so much and I find there seems to be nothing I can do about it, since ofcourse I tried everything I can think of, from punishment to "self-blackmailing" to rewards, samller tasks, ... you name it. There is just almost always this black hole as you say. I often say it's as if my motor is running on the highest rpm close to the rev limiter but I just can't find any traction or as if there is no clutch.
This video really made me think. I do not know if I have ADHD, there are/might be other mental health issues I struggle with and so many things of ADHD do not seem to fit, since I am in general more of a non impulsive controlled person. I just don't know what's going wrong and I'm not sure if I even understand this video.
Just as you said, it seems so odd people should only be able to be motivated by goals some months in advance. I mean: How would someone ever be able to save for a house, loose weight, or similar, if their motivation would only reach that far? Also I'm pretty sure even as a child I had longterm goals far beyond those few days or hours stated. I always was good at waiting or postponing a reward for a bigger / another one. So now I am thinking about whether there is something else to the term motivation and if it might be that people really do not have to use that much willpower to accomplish their things in the given timeframe. This idea is so confusing. I can't think of anything I wouldn't use mor or less sheer willpower to di it, or at least start it. I think I might have gotten the whole concept of motivation wrong. FOr me motivation is an idea and kind of an urge to do something, not really the train/flow of movement to do it. As you said it is so hard to describe. I'm really confused now but glad, that there is at least one person who seems to experience the same, although ofcourse I wouldn't whish this to anybody.
This is the main thing about ADHD, too. If you've watched his other videos, he has one on this exact subject. Performance vs. Knowledge.
We know what we need to do, but we can't...just do it.
@@ignoreme1141 Not exactly, it gets better with maturity but not perfect (but as I mentioned it can also get worse due to secondary effect entrenchment). Sleep well, train hard, try to establish routines of stability: try to outsource executive function to your routines as much as possible. Try as best you can find to find and cultivate mindsets which work against the ADHD which are not dependant on high levels of stress; WAY easier said than done though. But I do find that trying to be relaxed internally, almost meditative, can work, but it is HARD to consistently do it. Pumping myself up with stress works in the short run, and is easier to access, but it ruins you in the long run, and becomes positively counter-productive.
It isn't easy because there is a huge catch 22 ADHD, but what can one do? Hopefully medication will help me in the future.
This is so relatable… horrible
Damn that sounds familiar. It seems like everything will go to shit, so why even bother in the first place.
I need to find a way to save these posts.
Thank you!! I have known I have ADHD since 1982. I have 3 teenage daughters - one with ADHD. I have my masters degree and, 2 weeks ago, dropped my ADHD teen off at a named University with a huge scholarship in her pocket. My mom taught me the term ""Compensating Skills" and I have taught it to my daughter. (you used it here). One reason I find your channel so helpful is because you are telling me what, exactly the problem is using peer reviewed research so I know it's trustworthy. Once I understand WHAT the problem is, I can figure out ways to compensate. My ADHD daughter is in the process of learning how to do the same thing without my help now. I really wish insurance covered executive functioning coaches in college. It would provide a level of scaffolding that I can't because I'm mom. Actual working won't be a problem but college hits right where ADHDers are weakest. With regulating their sense of time.
BTW - the most valuable information you shared was that ADHD is a regulation disorder - not an attention disorder. The problem is regulating a person's attention, emotions, their sense of time, their motivation, their reaction to criticism, activity level, - all of it. It's too much or too little and it's by using compensating skills (timers calendars, external reminders, annoying ourselves etc) that allow us to function.
thanks to you as well. I appreciate your support.
Every time i talk to drs about lack if motivation i get anti depressant recommendations.
That can be their go to. Depression should be carefully diagnosed, not a default position.
@@jon123xyz But it IS their go to. Everytime.
Because learning how to motivate yourself, can take sometime, and the objective of treatment is to improve your quality of life while you are learning to understand your brain, and building your own hacks, although in theory, treatment for adhd, can help with that.
Because that's part of depression. ADHD isn't a lack of motivation; it's a specific manifestation of motivation.
@@Heyu7her3 i don't think that's correct. Adhd can present differently....my hyperactivity presents as intrusive thought patterns.
WOW!! This is so helpful to understanding some of my behaviors. But surely explains my sons behavior. Thanks so much!!
I have NEVER heard anything that remotely comes close to explaining ME than this video. Thank you,.Dr, from the bottom of my heart. This has explained EVERYTHING I simply cannot put into words. ❤
Exactly 💯.
Simply the fact that you took the time to fulfill a request fills me with joy! You have a great way of explaining things that we might not be able to organize and reproduce easily in our own.
Thank you so much for this, sir! It helps to understand WHY it’s so difficult to get/stay motivated, particularly with regards to personal goals, rather than job related ones.
Thank you so much, Dr. Barkley! It's humbling to see the lack of future orientation written out like that and encouraging to know that
1. it's not a personal failing that my brain works this way, and
2. there are interventions that are proven to help get my brain back on track.
I love how Moose tried to find whoever you started talking to at the start of the video
Thank you Dr. Barkley for setting up a UA-cam channel with all your priceless knowledge. I've been consuming your lectures, interviews, book and you have been the source of eye-opening information and explanations for me. I also want to take the opportunity to say that watching your older lectures were not only extremely valuable but very funny too. You could do stand-up comedy and fill up theaters of ADHDers !! I'm a 52 (female) officially diagnosed 3 years ago but investigating on my own for the last 10. I've been doing group BT and this helped a lot with identifying that I was not a lazy, My major issues are inconsistency, time blindness -where I hyperfocus on watching UA-cam for hours to acquire MORE knowledge on ....well...everything, on what now seems my way on trying to crack my brain. It's like I'm searching for the next video that will be better explained or understood because I forget the 95% of what I just watched, read, listened to. - Then my brain is overwhelmed with do-lists that I can never put into the right order, I cannot focus, I'm easily distracted by all the post-it sticky notes that I have on my desk and cannot even prioritise them, and at the end of the day I end up having done 1-2 things that could have been done in 10 minutes. My doctor didn't want to give me stimulants due to my mothers bipolar disorder (for the fear of some kind of worst disregulation?) and my premenopausal /hormonal situation that might be causing my memory/brain fog lack of motivation and energy to feel worse. Do you think I should ask for a new visit ? I'd love to try some meds. Thank you again
Thanks! I am glad you are finding this so informative. I would speak to your doctor again as I know of know evidence where use of prescription stimulants is likely to provoke bipolar manic episodes. It would be quite rare. Even if you had bipolar, expert psychopharmacologists I know would still treat the ADHD with meds assuming that the bipolar disorder was stabilized. Be well,
Thank you . I’m 79 yr old . I knew it before but now I understand!
Hello, friend. At 73, I found this presentation a breath of fresh air and life-affirming. So many plans, so few accomplishments... At least I have an explanation. It's like the old joke about women "having to be twice as good as men." I felt I had to give it three, four times the effort as that of a "normal" person just to get to that finish line... The stress was killing me and led me to opt for early retirement. When one is young one overcompensates, with age, well....
Be well.
To add to my other comment, I've never really thought about time preference as you've laid it out, partly I think because it *requires* time to think it through.... but you've hit the nail on the head; I have ADHD and my entire life seems to be lived in RAM like a computer, it's the 'what's going on right now' that matters to my brain, it's incredibly dynamic every single day. People with ADHD always have long term goals, they just never really make meaningful progress on them because something else comes up and becomes the 'new thing'. I'm lucky I have a supportive and loving wife who gets it. Two of my kids have ADHD (I was diagnosed in the last couple of years), but I'm at least thankful they know what they have and can work from that foundation, rather than waiting 40 years to find out and start getting things on track. Informative video :)
recently diagnosed here at 40yrs old. Your videos are amazingly helpful. Suddenly I don't feel broken and can see how to adjust things. Thank you Dr.
I remember seeing this in a larger lecture and it made so much more sense of my choices throughout my life. Really helpful having it in a shorter form to share!
Just knowing about it is helpful, it also means you can put in your supports and accommodations to account for it because you’re then addressing the right problem.
So true. Thanks!
Wow, the info about time and gratification was spot on! I was diagnosed a few years ago at fifty and have virtually no external control over this. My life has always been a mess and out of control. While it frustrated me to some extent, the eternal living in the moment component always made me think everything is fine, all the while not noticing the future ship was sinking. Living in the moment isnt really bad but I get depressed when I think of all the failures it has caused. Meds worked wonderfully for the first two on your list but here in canada we have doctor shortage and they wont prescribe it over the phone, so going without again and back to trying to learn more about it. Appreciate your channel because its not all about pull up your socks, stop being lazy etc. Or an overachiever with mild ADHD giving advice, not that some of their material isnt good but some of us are at baby steps while they are taking giant leaps. Thank you.
Thanks doc, that clears up some worries i had. knew most of these tricks, but it is hard to implement it into our lives. hope everyone who have been feeling low, self-doubting, guilty find a way
I’m 60 and just find out I have adhd. I knew something was not right but was always going after the depression problems. I Took a on line test and checked all the boxes. I can’t tell you the mixed feelings I had. I did get tested and was diagnosed. I’m on stimulates and this is like opening the shades of the world. I Would like to know how I can get into a group to help me move forward. My therapist is real busy and hard to get appointments with her. A direction would help. Thanks for showing us who we are as we seem to have blinders on.
I am 71 and got diagnosed this year. This gives me hope for my grandchildren so we don't put them through what we went through.
my partner got diagnosed with adhd at 60, same as you.
we have kind of the same problem as in how to move forward. i suggested starting with joining facebook/instagram groups like ADDitude or for us here ADHD IRELAND. connecting with people who have same often seems helpful,because at least one doesn t feel so alone. the other thing to do is keep watching adhd related youtubes, asking your general doctor for CBT certified therapists maybe ,instead of relying o just the one you know. the waiting period between diagnose and actual help can be a nightmare,and it feels as if no one is there to help,but remember...baby steps. EVERY little step brings you a little further towards the light at the end of the tunnel❤
also, we find it helpful to bridge the "horrible long-term wait with no gratification" with a huge sense of humour,joking together about being stuck momentarily , sometimes we even play a game..." if you were stuck in a hole 12 feet deep with mud around you, how would you get out?"...the funniest ideas are coming up and we end up laughing so hard,it literally takes away the "doom" mood.
i wish you the best and can only say do not give up!
ps...we are still waiting for professional help,on a "waiting list"..🙈
bless you🙏
Thank you. This video is like balm to my soul. I have beat myself up for more years than I care to count for my lack of self-discipline (and lived with depression since my teens). I only realised I might have ADHD relatively recently - I haven't sought out assessment yet because if I'm told I don't have it I feel that it would crush me. I do have most of the symptoms. And thinking of it as a neurobioligical disorder is helping me accept myself and find strategies to work around me executive function deficits. Thank you again.
Seeing him with his dog gave me the motivation to watch this video
I love science based information. This help a lot of us who have been struggling our whole life to get things done
Your videos are fantastic and giving me more techniques to offer in my practice. Thank you!!
Thank you for this. I’m going to share it with my parents and partner, and reflect on it myself.
Very kind of you to do so.
So how did it go? I'm an adult but I'm so tempted to share this because my Dad doesn't understand why it's so hard to keep things clean. He thinks it's a phone addiction or computer addiction. Did your parents understand? Did they have a light bulb moment?
I'm 29 now (female), unmedicated and have struggled with this stuff all my life. Was diagnosed with 10 due to always having emotional issues, being bullied since kindergarten and later on in my teens barely being able to function in a school setting without getting into trouble or people bringing trouble to me (teachers included). It's so wild to me how other people without ADHD don't have much or any of this, let alone to a debilitating impairing extent.
I really hope the German health system will allow me to get medicated soon. Found my ADHD diagnosis again 3-5 years ago
or smth and I'm glad I can receive help (when/if I ever get meds or even a psychiatrist since everything's full since, well, years, ugh).
Like others have already said here and below other videos; thank you so much for educating people here on YT as well and uploading new stuff. It's really much appreciated! :)
ya germany isnt fun, nor is adhd, but we do have abilities that ppl without adhd dont have like being a thuinktank nad comming up with lots of solutions fast and then also troubleshooting them in our heads. it would take at least like 3-5 people a whole week to brainstorm what we can in half an hour so if i had a choise to be "normal" or keep my adhd brain, i would keep what i have
Hey there! @chizuru94
i'm salah, i'm 27 a phisician, with adhd seit 2 years ago.
I live in algeria and i'm planning to move to germany in about 6 months. for instance i take atomoxetine ( the only medication available here) and it isn't really helping me, can i get a proper medication once there (in germany) since you said you hope the German health system will allow you to get medicated. is it not recognized there? is the amphetamines available in germany?
thank you for tanking the time to read my comment. ❤
Thank you, Dr Barkley for all of your work in this. I and those around me are better for your work.
The Coton de Tulear is the best dog ever! I have a whole family of them. Congratulations on your taste in this dog breed.
Thank you for this video.i was searching for the ways to motivate myself to get my study done which is due in 90 days approx.
I would incooperate this tips for next 3 months until im done with my competitive exams.
Thank you for all that youre doing. I appreciate every bit of your efforts.
Im myself a med student. And i cannot rap around the thoughtoff blindedness for adhd in psychiatrist in india.
I have visited 2 doctors and both refised to medicate me. Thank you for the lifestyle tips.
I would come back and tell you my results which will be due in mid november. 😊
You are like guiding light in the darkness for me. Thanks for everything!
I find the point with telling others of your plans to motivate you quite interesting. I tried that like a million times and it always failed. I do adhere to my plans if I don't talk about them more often. I feel like my brain thinks talking about something is the same as doing and achieving that thing. So stupid tbh.
Same! If i just imagine that i did something i am absolutely satisfied and chances are i will never do that in real life
@@erwvhkasdkvhsdjajsdhcadsh9055 I join both of you. I entered that same mentally soothing rabbit hole of imagining accomplishment and feeling the satisfaction of getting it done. Sadly, it satisfies _me_ but brought no project into the world for others to enjoy. I got solace and a perverse satisfaction from the fact that my fantasies did not involve extracting resources nor polluting the planet nor exploiting others. A harmless narcissism, I suppose.
Be well.
Are you talking about when you talk to yourself to self motivate? I do it and it pushes me forward when I can’t find external motivation. I’ve learned that I’ve got to work on myself and stop pleasing others before me. In my head I use the lifesaving techniques-put your mask in first and then you can help the person next to you.
Excellent information! Especially time orientation.
I have a daily routine to try to compensate, a little over time on a schedule
this explains alot about me it also explains why i need videos to play 2x - 3x speed just so i can retain what is said in the videos
Thank you for all you do for people with ADHD and those who love us. You have been such an important source of research-based information for me and I'm sure for hundreds of thousands of others.
I can't put into words how grateful I am for your immense contribution in the world of ADHD research and the dissemination of all the knowledge you have acquired on the topic.
You have had a huge positive influence on so many people's lives.
Thank you. 🙏
Only the last one works - making yourself accountable to others. And it’s so incredibly hard when you want to start your own business.
That doesn't work for me. Everything won't work for everyone.
@ hey Ive had 3 businesses, built and sold each. The ONLY way each one was able to suceed was when or after I found a partner. I LITERALLY gave one friend half the equity just to come work with me. By having just 1 person Im responsible to do my part for as a partner I work and get things done like no one anyone has seen. Left alone to just myself as the only benefactor, I almost could care less. The partner doesnt even have to be great, and I dont do less if we arent getting along. Im 100% if someone else would be cheated by me not doing my part. Im 2 % if its just me.
@@ScottPBrown thank you for the insight! I am doing the same right now, not with friend but worker from my previous project. The problem is, he is junior I am senior and he waits for me to guide and inspire him. And I tend to only do that as my work day and not do any of the other work, feeling satisfied that I’ve done management that day. Some days we just talk online about progress and I do nothing else in a day. I’m afraid he may see through it, that I don’t do much, and be losing interest because of that.
@@ScottPBrowni am this way. I seem to be a lot more motivated in a team setting where each of us can contribute our part of the total mission to reach the same goal. My problem is I seeking the motivation from others and not just me being the only person responsible for its success or failure. Finding someone else who I can “hold my hand” through the process that I can truly trust is the difficult part. I can’t be lead blindly without knowing the ins and outs. There’s plus and minuses to that as well so ultimately everything gives me anxieties and it’s easier to play dumb. I have a LOT of integrity so I would never purposely cheat someone out if I HAD a business or even get one started.
@@rebeccaherrera6006 it's just something about having one other person around but to be casually accountable to. Either that or probably like we all are, subjects of intense interest im all in. Deep. If it is not stimulating, I can still manage, but struggle to get energized.
i'm glad i'm not the only person who was unreasonably excited to see your dog lol
thank you very much for this video. it summarises some important aspects of how adhd works.
definitel says something.. when I was trying to multitask while listening to this and paused it and rewinded 3x before the 2 min mark... 😅
I must admit, I rewound this and most UA-cam info videos, at least 8-10 times as my listening brain "drifts." Worse with textbooks, sometimes I'll re-read the same sentence 4-5 times! Drives me batty...
Be well.
Thank you so much doctor! I desperately needed this. Currently medical student and preparing for entrance exam for postgraduate course and i find it difficult to accomplish long term preparation goals.😢 Thought i lack motivation and am ungrateful for my parents sacrifice for my studies.
Hey Sir, thanks for putting all this content over here on UA-cam. This will help me immensely in my journey through my recently diagnosed ADHD (in my mid-40s). Thanks, I have no words to express how immensely generous and welcome this is. Thank you. I'll be watching your videos for a while, I guess.
Thank you for worth sharing about ADHD. That’s whatI am facing with Motivation Deficit Disorder
7:42 Funny it is like that for people. For me, some past experiences or even the next class I am or would be heading to felt like smth new every time that I couldn't see coming or smth like that. And people were - understandably so, I guess - confused why I still didn't know what to do and to bring etc. every time/every class, sometimes. Oh, what I'd give to live like someone without ADHD for a week or smth :') I can just hope medication might give me even a glimpse of that. I already had 29 years of pain and suffering due to this disorder :(
Excellent! Thanks for making your videos, they’re so helpful for me personally and in my work as a professional helping others with ADHD.
Thanks, Doctor Barkley.
Thank you for this presentation Dr Barkley. I truly appreciate all your efforts and the content you make available. I just got diagnosed last month because I started to feel like I was struggling to stay focused while studying even though I thought the content I wasn't that difficult. My math skills are quite good so that's been carrying me in my Electrical Engineering program but the theoretical parts are really hard for me. I just thought it was my anxiety keeping me from focusing then I went for an assessment and the psycholgist and explained that my working memory was abysmal but mostly everything was above average. I started taking my 18mg of Concerta last week and wow what a game changer, especially the first three days. I was so calm and my anxiety disappeared. I felt very robotic, I did not smile or laugh as much as I regularly do which was actually nice. It made me think maybe I laughed too much because I was always anxious. At work I wasn't frantic, and I was moving so efficiently throughout the day. I felt extremely motivated and I wasn't having to convince myself to do things like clean the bathroom or do the laundry or wash the dishes. I just thought it and did it. I did notice though that the Concerta only lasted about 7 hrs the first and second day. It's only been lasting about 5 hours or less in the second week and sometimes I can't notice if it's working. The random songs and fake scenarios and just popping into my head again but when I become aware of it, they just go away now. Gonna see my GP next week to see about the dosage.
Yet another excellent, easy to follow advice video for adhd. Some of these things really make sense to me.
This explanation was so easy to understand, thank you! I would love another video if you could go more in-depth on ADHD and how it can combine with autism, as I feel that some of the resources recommended here aren't as applicable to auDHD folks (like taking 10 minute breaks between tasks, if I take a break it's much too hard for me to pull out of the task overwhelm slump, I need to focus in and not stop until I've completed my project)
I needed this one today! No disrespect intended that I refer to you as “our Russell” in my therapy sessions! God blessed me to choose a therapist who specializes (and has!) ADHD. She diagnosed me as I turned 55. I’ve had it all my life but became completely unmanageable when I hit a period of too much stress and menopause. I’m struggling to do the things I need to do and she holds space for me, defends me and yes, challenges me. Your comment about not using as an excuse and you need to figure out a way to do “it” hit the nail on the head. Currently unmedicated for multiple reasons, but will re-address with PCP this week after having the GeneSight test (irony that after 3 months of crazy side effects on Strattera, it showed up in red 😁)
Thank you so much for your love of this subject and your continued research and sharing! We love you!!! ❤️
The ADHD is not an excuse but an explanation is very enlightening. I’ve been following Dr. Barkley for more than 10 years and it really has helped me to know much more about the whys of how In am. I was diagnosed with ADHD in Japan, when I was 32. I’m 43 now and been living in Japan since I was 19. Japan is a society that won’t accept any excuses, even if they are real. Yes, there might have been a train accident and you were late but that is not excuse. Let alone saying you have ADHD, they won’t waste their time trying to understand something they don’t see and have no reason to. By itself it is a very hostile society when it comes to LDs. Emphasizing that you are a failure and that’s it just blows away all your self-esteem to a point that is so devastating that you eventually believe it and you end up feeling pity for yourself, play the “ADHD excuse” as self-preservation and convince yourself it is indeed true. Eventually you go down the rabbit hole of depression, substance abuse, isolation. So shall be this a reminder that there’s no excuse and I must fix this somehow. About substance abuse, drugs are just a no-no here, just testing positive would ban me from being in Japan forever and lose everything I have, my wife, daughter. But alcohol was an issue. I was drinking specially when I was bored and I was doing it while watching Netflix. Then I quit cold torquey a year ago. Didn’t struggle at all, I don’t know why. Please don’t do it like I did, it’s like playing with fire. I just realized about that now. Wow… So yes, it’s time to use ADHD as an excuse. The other one that really is an excuse and very devastating having severe protanopia. So being color blind and having ADHD together is a whole different story.
I find one thing that really helps with learning for the future is setting a very appealing (and likely unrealistic end goal) one that sounds so juicy I can't help but make small adjustments to get there overtime.
I showed it to my boyfriend 💜thank you so much. He finally understood some things and I hope will stop calling himself and me lazy. Hate that word. I don't make alarms because I'm lazy, but bcs of executive dysfunction and this is one of many coping skills that help. I need an accountability person near me while I clean, bcs without buddy doubling it's too hard. But I get it done, jzst my way
I'm sorry I'm so late, but wow holy crap this is right! I thought that having an accountability buddy helping you get chores(or almost anything else) done meant you were becoming dependent on them to help you function, and I was worried about that! But then I remeber I'm Adhd and this is a huge coping thing. Like I don't even *want* to make a meal without my partner being there, even if I'm feeling like a bottomless pit. My partner doesn't seem to understand that I literally need him to help me out with things so I can be motivated. Then again....maybe I need to explain that to him🤨🧐
Thank you Dr. Barkley, this is so helpful.
Dr. Barkley, thank you for your ongoing work to clarify ADHD's impact. I’ve read that ADHD is significantly more prevalent in incarcerated populations compared to the general public. Could you elaborate on the factors that might contribute to this? Specifically, how might challenges like impulsivity, emotional regulation, and executive functioning issues increase the risk of involvement with the justice system? And what role do social factors, like family instability or lack of early diagnosis, play in this context? Thank you for your insight on this important issue.
I really enjoyed this video Dr Barkley. Some great & practical tips for replenishing the EF tank. Regarding the 'take frequent break' strategy; what would you reply to clients that say something like 'if I take a break I won't want to go back to it.'
Thanks. That is certainly a possibility with frequent breaks but can also happen even without them. Re engaging tasks after a break can be a challenge but we found that when adults had longer tasks to do, breaking them down into smaller chunks seemed less overwhelming to do. Be well
would love more info on this topic. i feel this is way bigger of an obstacle then focus ever was.
Moose/miniMoose is very cute.💛And I LOVE the focus of this video!!!!!thanksdoc Thank you very important!
@12:20 commenting just as I want a personal time stamp/reminder of this key part.
Thanks Russell!
thanks a lot doctor I have been fan of your speeches ever since I was diagnosed
THANK YOU! This is a fantastic summary.
And thank you for watching.
I have always had problems in my life with time management. I considered myself time colorblind, unable to understand whether an activity would require 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 1 month, 6 months to be carried out. I spent years dealing with this in therapy. Apart from several other issues of energy spikes, and other moments without energy to keep me going, lack of motivation. I never thought about ADHD. Until I went to a doctor who alerted me to this possibility. I didn't accept it, I went to someone else who told me the same thing. I was diagnosed recently. I'm still in the acceptance phase
Thank you Doctor Barkley for writing for adults. Your reader is from Russia.
Thanks for viewing my work. I have visited your country several times, even back when it was the Soviet Union, and again after that and loved the people and country. It's a shame our governments demonize each other when our people and what they value are so similar. I wish you well in finding help there.
Would love a talk that points out how these EF issues might specifically manifest in romantic relationships.
Thanks for your video.
I’ve heard to watch out for periods of hyper focus on partner and then disinterest. And then that disinterest leads to resentment if you view them as interrupting you when you are hyper focusing on something else (isolating to dopamine chase).
@@RyanFurunessI think you unintentionally just helped me figure out why I’m so bad with relationships, that just made so much sense and everything just clicked, thank u! I will definitely be looking out for this in the future now that I know what to look for exactly! Much appreciated
@@bansheewolfps4864 Definitely! I saw this on reddit one time and saw how important it was and have tried to remember and spread it since. People with ADHD need to know how it affects this area of their life
@RyanFuruness this is me during reading! If I'm reading (or even listening to an audio book) and I get interrupted: I'm am so close to exploding on you and tearing you a new one.
@@RyanFuruness Agree. I was raised with four sisters and did not want to end up as a heartbreaking SOB. I stumbled into the strategy of prompting girlfriends who wanted to "take it to the next level" initiate the break. I knew the relationship would not work in the long term due to my ADHD lifestyle complications, i.e. lack of follow through in academics and professional life, which would mean wedded to a failure... I feigned distancing, other plans, inconsiderateness, selfishness, etc. They eventually got sick of me and "dumped" me. What a relief. I knew or suspected that if I was incapable of long-term goals, I was incapable of long-term (life time) commitment.
I misfired once and one of them hates me or so her relative later told me. I felt really, really bad when I heard this unpleasant news.
Be well.
You have a dog and he's not a Russell Terrier called 'Barkley'???? For shame!
For real though, Moose is ridiculously cute ❤
Edit:
This is the perfect video to show my family and friends!
Thank you for sharing Moose as well as this clear content.
Thanks for the doggy dopamine hit!!! 💖
I usually talk to myself when alone has if I where speaking to a different part of me, really helps to put into conciousness the tasks and causes of events to then write down solutions and time frames. Hope this helps someone.
This explains why it took until my 40s before I got my personal finances in some sort of 'not completely awful' state
Three things I find that are really helpful for me (I do not medicate for my ADHD), are 1) regular exercise that gets my heart rate up, 2) lowered sugar in my diet and 3) writing things down, drawing or doodling while I'm thinking / processing (helps with visualising). I have a large family and a successful IT career, and over the years I have learned to compensate, purely by trial and error and having to as a necessity to survive.
This is the problem that have caused most problem in my life
Excellent video. Thank you
Dr Russell, thank you so much for all the work you share, i have a question about adhd overlapped with traits of bpd and taking medication for both as in ssri in the evening and concerta in the morning. Of course prescribed by a psychiatrist. I would like to hear your opinion about the overlaping and medications.
Thank you, Dr Barkley, for these lectures and videos. As an adult with ADHD, I find this enlightening and so helpful. I wish all adults with ADHD and parents to ADHD children see this. I have a question. Do you maybe have books or videos translated to Hebrew? If it is possible to add Hebrew subtitles to your videos, I'd be happy to contribute.
Yes, and the time preference truncation is linked to the short term memory issue. We won't be able to "contain" by way of preparation for that time now so we will address it in our Now moment later when we can "contain" it.... it's a coping function of the short term memory challenges.
You are amazing! Hugs of Brazil
Thank you.
Dr. Barkley, I'm so glad you created a channel and are offering up these videos. I want to ask about the last part of the video where you discuss making ourselves accountable to others. With ADHD's high comorbidity with other disorders (eg anxiety/depression) how would you suggest we walk the fine line of holding ourselves accountable to others versus while not becoming "people pleasers"? Is the defining factor being a goal for ourselves rather than a goal for others? I know that can also be difficult to sort out in the immediate moment, but I personally feel like I blurred that line myself as I was growing up and that carried over into adulthood, eventually exacerbating my anxiety and depression to the point of burnout. I am working with a therapist to work on these issues, but I would love to hear your thoughts on how we can hold ourselves accountable while ensuring that we are working to be motivated towards *our* goals. Thank you!
Yes, it’s for your own personal or occupational goals or tasks primarily. And it should be arranged to be supportive an d motivating not judge mental. Be well.
Agree! Is people-pleasing a sociological and unwelcome "side-effect" of ADHD? One does not want to let people down. I still have regrets after 50 years that in some rather, now trivial circumstances, I did. Do not wish to alienate/disappoint people and feel I often overcompensate. Or is this my defensive narcissism talking?
Be well.
I feel like my biggest over-arching issue with ADHD is the fact that I can't visualise 😮💨 I am a trained Illustrator but I can never envision an artwork before I create it. I honestly have no idea how I make anything. It feels like a massive struggle every time, and I don't have any say over whether a piece works out or not 😮💨 Yet I have an almost obsessive compulsion to create, not just artworks but jewellery, objects, anything that attracts my attention. And I do create them and people always love them and want me to make more but I can't sustain any consistency because nothing about the process feels linear! I'm just along for the ride and I have no idea if I'll be able to stay connected long enough to finish the thing 😬
I can't really see any pictures in my mind that I can pull up to encourage motivation to stay on task in work or in life in general. No visions of how the piece will end up looking, no visions of the desired outcome in terns of fulfilling a brief, and no visions of a career path! 🤦♀️ Is it possible to learn to visualise??
I currently rely on Pinterest etc and will be making some vision boards later this week but it really sucks to not be able to imagine something independently. I have no idea why I would have both the technical ability to create plus the compulsion to do so, but without the corresponding visualisation?
Thank you for putting this into words!!!!
@@kristenkiste6372 I would never wish it on anyone, but there's some comfort in knowing I'm not alone! 🥴💜
Are you on medication? I found adhd meds really hindered my ability to do this. Lots of lawyers will do some work on meds and more creative work off of meds. Hope this helps!
@@BobrLovr thanks for the response! No I'm not on meds, I'm always fearful of medication 😗 I have felt desperate enough to consider them especially recently, but I've also heard from others who say the meds further dampen creativity 🤔 Did you continue with the meds on the days when you didn't need to think creatively?
@leanneart as of recently I've began to experiment with taking creative days off. I'm a musician and I have been my whole life, but I completely quit all music when I started taking meds, it just no longer did anything for me.but luckily because of its short half life it's totally okay to just stop taking the meds and rest assured your normal self comes right back, for better or for worse . Medication helps a lot with paying attention, but I highly suggest going back and forth for maximum productivity.
Watching this a second time to really wrap my brain around it. I paused it on the slide of the 4 developmental transitions in control of behavior to think about this. The problem I have is with Time. I am famous for saying "in a minute" when what I really mean is in 30 minutes or more. At the same time I may be relating a story to someone as something that happened "the other day" but if I really stop and try to pin down when it happened (which is hard) it may have been a year or several years ago. For delayed gratification I am perfectly able to delay gratification. The problem arises in coming back to harvest the fruits of my delayed gratification. And gardening is a perfect example. I can grow peas from seed. I can nurture them in the early days. But at a certain point they don't need constant attention. Once I don't have to go out and care for them on a daily basis I may never come back to eat the peas I invested so much in at the start. Before I know it it's August and the peas are over grown and inedible. I try to be philosophical about it and think of how much my garden has contributed to the ecosystem if not to my larder. But part of me knows that if I delay self gratification I may never reap the rewards. So maybe the next time I think about growing peas I just shrug and tell myself I won't succeed and so therefore I should just buy a bag of peas for immediate gratification. So does a preference for immediate gratification maybe just come down to a learned behavior caused by a memory deficit?
That is a very interesting point because it's not clear about the chicken and egg here. Some people do describe the fact that by not being able to hold ideas in mind as well or as long as others, they opt to do things now or they will forget about them. So they seem impulsive and opt for the immediate reward because of a working memory problem. But then we also know that poor inhibition contributes to some extent to that kind of working memory problem, especially through being so distractible. So I think it's an interaction of the two more than just a simple one way explanation. Also, people vary markedly in their time preference, like on a bell shaped curve, and it seems to be related more to genetic and biological factors than social ones. Yet cultural and situational factors can affect time preference or choice behavior. So, it's complicated, but you raise an interesting possibility for some people. Thanks!
muchas gracias!
7:14 Nope. My sense of time never advanced normally. This illustration of how other people develop is so crazy. I can’t believe how different I am! I never knew!
It took me till I was 55 to believe in the concept of compounding interest.
I have learned that I respond better if I thank higher power for helping me after I’ve completed something. It freaks me out to pat myself on my back.
Could ADHD be a long-successful strategy for dissociation from traumatic environments?
Regarding 15:00 : Are there any tips on how one should do that, if medidation and "mindfulness" itself feels like something you need to force yourself to? I personally found that the act of letting my brain wander around or simply getting up and walking around helps myself way more than any other practice.
I think that the accommodations and coping strategies can be highly individualistic, as you noted and what works for some, such as mindfulness, won’t work for others. Be well.
The longer lecture with this slide is super helpful. Would you still consider glucose/blood sugar levels to be a major contributor to EF/motivation ability? I’m also curious if protein plays a role, since my understanding is that the amino acids from protein are what our brain uses to make dopamine and other neurotransmitters. Great video as always!
The work on blood glucose was done on typical people. Consuming small amounts over time did help them to sustain their EF on tasks. So when I suggested it I was extrapolating from that work in the book, Handbook of Self-Regulation by Kathleen Vows and Roy Baumeister. But since the work wasn't done with people with ADHD I needed to be careful about recommending it until such a study was done with ADHD specifically.
Thanks ❤
Thank you so much. For ALL your work. 💞
I'm always in the here and now. Currently in College. Meds allow me to sit through class without losing my sht or falling asleep 5 minutes in. But I do no assignments. 500 word essay was due last week lol. Time flys! Next thing I know its the next class. I'm literal out of sight out of mind lol. I need a daily schedule and routine let's go!!!
I have no time to leave my desk and its killing me. I struggle with time horizons too, I want dearly to quit my job; I will have no shame being poor as long as I don't have to sit in that chair chasing customers and expecting to know 8 different schedules going on. Then I get yelled at for hyper focussing on a task and not talking because I'm meant to be juggling other plates... I won't quit but its so draining having to rationalize to myself each time why it'd be a bad idea to quick now and torch my work history. I often think getting fired would be a blessing for my sanity.
Hi, I think if the task is simple or "rote" ... that little breaks are beneficial. But when I was working as an RN geriatric psychiatric clinician with frequent admisions, or an RN weekend evening supervisor in charge of a 60-bed convalescent center, both of which generated various types of emergencies .... uhh, no ... mental breaks were disruptive to keeping everything going in my head, re-prioritizing, shifting focus from patient care to family communications and education to staff needs and problems and back again. No, I stayed completely focused constantly. Maybe some others who don't have adhd can stop and start in such environments, but not me. I needed to maintain 100% focus for hours, just to perform as well as those without adhd. But often, I out-performed others due to more conscientious attention to all details. (Another thing .... in nursing school I "over-studied" in order to deeply embed the information in long term memory, to recall it very quickly, and that saved a lot of time and helped compensate for my adhd 👍)
I live in Japan, and a normal greeting would be to ask someone if they're "genki" or energetic. I always have deep thoughts whenever someone ask me this since I couldn't fathom why anyone would be energetic to go do their job. I'm only there to get paid, and the only day I'm a bit energetic is when it's payday. Videogames and hobbies however are the only times where I can truly feel motivated. If I play a game for hours without going out to pee or eat, I'll consider that a good day as a human. It's only when you deliberate that you need to work tomorrow that depression rises it's head. Without work I feel like I'm finally becoming a normal person.
I think I compensated my lack of motivation with being overly energetic so I got burnt out instead.
I understand that instant reward issue with something so simple as my writing. I am more constant with fanfic writing because I post it chapter by chapter, but with the novel/book I'm writing the motivation is not as good because my reward will be meet in the longtime and not after finishing one chapter.
Luck you, I've been working on the same god damned techno track for 4 years lol.
As I posted above, I need _serious_ help with this issue. Stuck writing (bad) poetry, letters to the editor and OpEds. These have their rewards but I consider them very confining.
Be well.
It’s funny because ADHD also looks like it could be that somebody’s in a state of trauma or PTSD where they in their survival mode can only think more immediately than somebody who is in a non-stressed situation
Hence, the reason UA-cam hosts the "crappy childhood fairy" my other go-to on line counselor... Like Dr. Barkley she addresses PTSD/ADHD-like issues (i.e. Childhood Development Trauma) not recognized in the DSM-V! But nonetheless very _real symptoms_ continue to surface to disrupt one's sanity and mental well-being.
Be well.
The reason I’ve started looking into how ADHD therapy works is that I believe those tactics will help my CPTSD.
I am amazingly motivated to pursue my OWN goals and my OWN creativity. I just don't want to pursue what society wants me to pursue. If you stop trying to force kids to obey and conform you'll learn what ADHD really is. It's not a disorder. It's just an inability to fit into this messed up, backwards, harmful civilization. I am not "distracted", I just follow different routes and do what I want along the way. If you stop trying to force us into a box, we're much happier AND we do amazing things. Please study the social model of disability.
Agreed ADHD is only a problem if you want to be well integrated in modern society. If you qere totally self sufficient theb there will be no issues, your ducks and goats will tell you they need to be fed on time, so there is always external motivators
Hi Dr Barkley. Great video. Something that comes up in your videos is problem solving difficulties for ADHD patients.
And I want to understand that more because I have always thought my greatest skill was problem solving. But maybe it is actually problem identification.
How are great minds who most likely had ADHD like Steve Jobs able to problem solve and work on long term projects?
Maybe he was just good at identifying the problem? But how do these CEOs with ADHD work on long term projects? Like the CEO of JetBlue?
Would love to know more about link between ADHD and problem solving. Thank you!
@Osvath97 Thanks for putting words to my thoughts and actions. Also appreciate all the replies.
I’m new to learning about ADHD but it’s been part of life since forever (I’m now 60)
It’s comforting to know that it’s not “just me”.
sometimes my days feel like this: I'm a dog-walker responsible for, lets say, thirty dogs on leashes and I'm walking thru a rabbit farm. 😂 All kinds of dogs - large and small, starving and overweight, very energetic and totally sluggish - a few are dragging behind trying to potty, different pairs are fighting, some seem injured or sick, a few have slipped their collars and are running loose, and many leashes are tangled around my legs and arms. So...now I just need to choose what is most important to address first and break it down into a few steps and tell a friend for accountability and plan a reward for myself all the while keeping up some positive self-talk...got it 👍👏👏👏
Thank you so much for this.
Could you please link here to the longer video on motivation? Thanks!
Hi Dr. Barkley! Thank you for this great video. I have a specific video request: can you do a video on Alcohol an ADHD? Obviously alcohol must impair Executive function, but to what extent? Should ADHD individuals avoid alcohol moreso than regular people? Can ADHD people drink occasionally and suffer no further problems than regular people?
I ask this partially because I feel that even small amounts of alcohol destroys the EF tank far more in ADHD people than in regular people. Yet, some people seem to get more work done with a small drink than they would otherwise.