I'm curious if my comment was removed by UA-cam, you Ma'am or if it was pending for your approval.Please let me know at your end.This censorship by progressives is out of control.
There was a video in Australia they tested 180 women experiencing stress during pregnancy 1. Women who reacted positivelly to stress,...which means the stress decreased their kids didnt have any mental or physical issues after the birth 2. Women who reacted negativelly to stress during pregnancy or they experienced long term stress and anxiety their kids had to visit the doctors the first years of childhood. because her body released a stress hormones that get into her blood and into the fetus. I guess if there would be some yoga or pilates classes for pregnant women, where women relax in relaxing positions, exercise their body feel less pain from pregnancy, release stress, pressure do some spa healing or some sound haeling etc maybe this holistic approach would help women. So husbands should be patient with their women during pegnancy, because she becomes easily tired from pregnancy, also being loving husband and women should be also careful and avoid stress, or find a specialist, if they have anxiety.
There was a video in Australia they tested 180 women experiencing stress during pregnancy 1. Women who reacted positivelly to stress,...which means the stress decreased their kids didnt have any mental or physical issues after the birth 2. Women who reacted negativelly to stress during pregnancy or they experienced long term stress and anxiety their kids had to visit the doctors the first years of childhood. because her body released a stress hormones that get into her blood and into the fetus. I guess if there would be some yoga or pilates classes for pregnant women, where women relax in relaxing positions, exercise their body feel less pain from pregnancy, release stress, pressure do some spa healing or some sound haeling etc maybe this holistic approach would help women. So husbands should be patient with their women during pegnancy, because she becomes easily tired from pregnancy, also being loving husband and women should be also careful and avoid stress, or find a specialist, if they have anxiety.
Just some observations as I've struggled with this exact thing: Dating apps turn humans into brands at best or literally act as pimps at worst. The introduction of hookup culture and "corn" has destroyed so much of our culture socially. It's created the illusion of unlimited options and perfect matches. It has also cheapened long term relationships and the sacred nature of intercourse. Polyamory may destigmatize a reality in which humans have complex physical and emotions needs, but it will not address underlying feelings of insecure or avoidant attachment and will act as a lightning rod to draw those in, as well as narcissists looking for a never ending supply. Due to the Coolidge effect, I'm not convinced of the ability to maintain loyalty without resentment bubbling up. Absolutely nobody should be in a relationship with someone who resents them for asking for the bare minimum of commitment. I am not interested in hooking up. I never was, I never will be. I would never cheapen my energy like that. If I'm being honest, serial monogamy just feels like polyamory with more steps. I'm not looking for a companion or experience. I'm looking for a life partner to build with. Someone safe. Someone who can compartmentalize when to be tough and when to be soft. Someone who values growth as a person. Someone who shares my values of longevity, instead of looking where the grass is greener when things get tough. Someone who doesn't suffer from the demons of addiction or believe the world revolves around their wants. Someone who sees the values of responsibility and who would sacrifice now for a better tomorrow. Someone not driven by hedonism, but by care and compassion for others. Someone with hope, instead of nihilism. I am indifferent about having children, because most women I see having them end up as single parents. I am never going to put myself in that position. Children need fathers. Good, present, compassionate fathers. The world is hard. It's easier when we face it together and remember we are on the same team. Choose for values. Don't choose for infatuation masquerading as love. Love is not just a feeling. It's a bond maintained by action of sacrifice. It's also not fair to ask unconditional love of anyone, other than yourself. We read our intentions, but judge the world by its actions. In reality, everyone should be judged by action alone, not hiding behind principles. Good men and good women exist. Now to have a good relationship, we just have to stop being so afraid of each other.
@@indigoneutral 🐲 thank you for that post... it resonates very much... partially perceived as paradox, but still it triggers my most inner aspects. 🤔 🙏🏻🧘🏻♂️🙏🏻
@@indigoneutral In acknowledging that the world is hard, you've inadvertently validated why dating apps and hookup culture exist, as well as why the cultural elements you value are being destroyed: In a hard world, people want their needs to be achievable enough based on where they're at. If that's not possible, they'll either make it easier or give up on/destroy the whole thing. The cultural elements you value don't meet the needs of many, and are thus being devalued accordingly.
I want to share my story. My mother and father were married in a traditional marriage, which means that my mother does not work and my father is the provider, but they are not happy and have been quarreling a lot recently. My mother decided to give up everything and do whatever my father wants because divorce is difficult for women in our society. Their problem is that they are not the same and One of them must submit to the other in order for the relationship to continue on the surface level. Many people in my country suffer from problems in their relationships due to incompatibility. Everyone is forced into one mold. What Teal says is really important, and I read an unfortunate comment that believes that the solution is old traditional relationships, or that women’s work is the reason, but this is not true. I live in a traditional society, and relationships do not work here either.
@@user-qb4eb8vq5uBeside the point. Divorce isn’t an option, it seems. Patience and compromise, also doesn’t seem apparent. Couples in the past made and agreement when they got married to put up with each other’s idiosyncratic behavior. It appears this is not the bar anymore and people abdicate or they don’t talk about it in a healthy way in order up seek resolution. Lack of trust and respect brings this. This fear is the motivation for EVERYTHING whether someone knows it or the fear is subconscious. Hormones are the key to every thought, feeling and action for all of us. Psychobiologically, I mean. The rest is our egos and our identities.
@@OneMountainNinelet’s remember, none of this should be dictated by law. Legislation cannot correct difficult relationships and women tend to be on the losing side when this is attempted.
I am trying to analyse my personal story in the context of this video. My marriage was very "customised". Both my husband and valued honesty. We thought we could have a long term marriage - planned for the long haul - happily ever after. Went to swingers parties as didn’t want each to miss out and always wander - what if. Thought we could have it all while being in a commited, loving, supportive relationship. We had a child 13 years into our relationship. She's five now, so we've been together for 18 years. And now we are divorcing after all that effort. I am the initiator. Things started to get out of hand after we've purchased a beautiful apartment together. He got involved with another woman and couldn't keep boundaries on that relationship. Started to devalue me and abuse me emotionally. I was perpetually busy with all the responsibilities of raising our child, household chores and full time job, while he had the freedom to "entertainin" himself. I complained for the period of 10 months, saying its not going to end well. I dont know what he thought of me - that I'd be his door mat since I valued unconditional love and marriage. Maybe he thought I wouldn't leave so he could abuse me. The moral of the story - if both people want to, they'll make the relationship work and last. It takes two. I think it doesn't matter what model of relationship we pick. Unfortunately, when we get involved with another person we take a risk. There are no guarantees in any scenario. I think that perhaps to be authentic, we shouldn't allow ourselves to be abused and practice self love. The goal is not to have a relationship last forever but perhaps to learn and evolve. Let go easier if it doesn't work.
Wow - that’s quite a ride. I am sorry. Truly. imagine that if and when you get into another relationship, you are going to have clarity about what you want/don’t want. In the meantime, hopefully you’ll love yourself up. One thing is for sure, you learned a lot and this will never happen to you again. Too, you are (still) the prize, so please don’t lose sight of that. XOXO
@@coreycox2345 Thank you for your comment. "Don't want it if I'm sure it won't work". If I undersnad you correctly, yeah sure why get into something if it's not for you. Societal pressure to be in a relationship? One of the models Teal mentioned is to be single. We can have several fulfilling relationships that don't have to be romantic. Even if its romantic but doesn't last yet it is fulfilling for both, why not. Another thing is about taking the risk - having our heart open and being vulnerable to being hurt. Betrayal can come from anyone - close family even. It depends what we take from it - learn and evolve, heal ourself and help others heal.
@@andrew.gardinerhey, thank you for your comment and your heartfelt message. Yes, one thing this ride taught me is to heal from my own traumas by standing up for myself and being more authentic rather than people pleasing. I learned that there are no guarantees, no matter how hard I try. I am ok with being vulnerable to hurt and betrayal - such is a human experience. I won't let fear of it rule my life though - I am much more than that. I can (still) have a good life - I did not betray myself or anyone else so I can live with my conscience. Wish you all the best as well 😉
If you’re intelligent, financially independent and have self reverence, you won’t fall for a poor bargain and if things change, you won’t hesitate leaving.
@@shelbyphan7771 you're right, sometimes it's like that. This has ramifications 1 the fear it's created through conditioning from other relations or just learning how others react to certain things in general etc. 2 the fear is a result of your current partner conditioning it... well that's how the partner actually decided what you are "allowed" to say 🤷 3 the fear is a result of social conditioning using propaganda and even punishment under law... Like for example in some countries, if you call fat a fat person you can be sued 🤷 This is another way someone else decides what you're "allowed" to say or not. 4 you can fear hurting the other person unnecessarily, when you care for them, by saying something that actually doesn't really matter that much to you. Fear is not always bad. Love is all inclusive, therefore includes fear 🤷 Fear is not necessarily opposing love. It's a matter of balance 🤷
I just visited my Aunty and Uncle who are in their late 70s who I haven't seen since my brother's funeral... they are celebrating 55 years of marriage! Which is rare. I listened to his life story and from a very young age, he was abandoned by his own mother at the age of 7, who ran off with another man. They just live in harmony with each other. I love seeing them.
It's not rare to be married 50+ years. Modern people are becoming more selfish that's why they jump from person to person. The "I'm not happy" mantra of modern women is destroying society. My parents - currently 54 years married Grandparents - 50+ Aunt & Uncle - 50+ Aunt & Uncle - 50+ Aunt & Uncle - 50+ Aunt & Uncle - 50+ Aunt & Uncle - 40+ Aunt & Uncle - 40+ Aunt & Uncle - 40+ Aunt & Uncle - 40+ Aunt & Uncle - 30+ Aunt & Uncle - 30+ Aunt - married 3 times Aunt - married 2 times Grandma - married 5 times - you guessed it, the 2 Aunts that did the divorcing came from this grandma
@ronmexico8383 it's great the you have examples of long term marriages. However, just because your family has those examples doesn't mean it's not rare in the overall scheme of things. It means 50+ year marriages are common for you. Zoom out.
You can be married for 50+ years and still be unhappy or abused but unable to leave because you are financially dependent on your spouse. Duration of marriage isn't the only metric of a happy relationship
@@ronmexico8383 people have always been extremely selfish, that is not new. i wish i could be as naive and stupid to truly think being selfish and evil is a new thing
My girlfriend just enjoy lying next to each other or sitting next to each other. We have no other expectation except that we enjoy being in each other's company. It's a VERY simple model.
We just got back from a weekend get away. I paid for dinner on Friday. Then Saturday night she wanted to pay. Sure fine. No problem. We both have jobs.
I feel like people aren’t satisfied or appreciative of what they have. It’s not easy finding a partner you truly get along with who has integrity, is honest, etc. but once they have it they always feel they can do better
Exactly this and I've seen it from both men and women. A woman will find a good man and be happy but after a while, she wonders if she can do better so she tries to climb the ladder to what she thinks is a better man only to realize the grass isn't greener on the other side and she just ruined the good relationship she had. Likewise, a man will find a nice cute girl and be happy but then he gets greedy and arrogant and thinks I can get a hotter girl and ends up ruining his relationship.
How are you always reading my mind? The timing of your videos is phenomenal and reminds me that my individual concerns are shared with everyone - you are TUNED IN.
How could a system created in 1944 with the Bretton Woods agreement possibly have predicted the population growth and planned to provide housing for larger future generations? With what resources would they have acted and to what end?
Yes! I've been saying that last bit so much. If everyone can just be honest with themselves and what they truly want out of life it would be the most gorgeous thing we've ever seen. If you start being honest with yourself you can find an honest partner who matches the same frequency!! ❤
“Love yourself first” sounds like a recipe for selfishness. I would replace that with “Respect yourself first”. Then “find some bigger ideal to which you should subjugate yourself to in the pursuit of meaning”. That can be a number of things: career, society, a cause, family etc. I do believe we should not try to pursue happiness but contentment in life. Happiness is the extra toping on top that creeps up on you. Sounds like what Jordan Peterson would say, still i subscribe to that ethos.
@@teomosu Loving oneself first is not selfishness. The reason most relationships end up failing is because people are looking for another person to fill a gap in their lives. They're hoping that another person's "love" will complete them and make up for their own feelings of abandonment, lack of self-respect unworthiness or insecurity. Since nobody can ever live up to or fulfill those expectations, the relationship eventually disintegrates. A healthy, loving relationship can only happen when two emotionally healthy people come together. That means people who have worked through and healed their traumas, people who have come to love and respect themselves and really get to know who they are. All relationships teach us something about ourselves. And not all relationships are meant to last forever because people grow and change and sometimes people grow apart and that's ok. That said, the healthiest relationships imo are the ones where two people come together because they choose to share their lives, not because they NEED the other for whatever reason.
Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.
Its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 5 years ended, but i couldn't just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back.
The best examples of relationships that I saw in my life were so simple and yet so hard. I mean people who fixed most of their red flags instead of using them to disqualify. These people grew old and gray holding their hands while being gentle but firm with each other. I always had the perception that their love for each other was Godly, unconditional and faithful, and maybe that holy unworldly energy was the fuel for life's transactions and hardships. God bless! 🙏
The first part of this video is probably the best synopsis of what is going on with the state of relationships in 2024. On a personal note, I am 52m never married and no kids; it's just so much easier and less stressful this way.
As always, Teal puts very abstract concepts pulled from science and research into "human readable form". I come from medical/psychtherapy background and I read a lot of scientific literature on topics that Teal is talking about.... but I'm always envious on how she's able to put it right. When I talk about such things... to most people it just sounds boring. There is a paper on this in evolutionary psychology recently published by Danish scientist. But the way Teal puts things together.... is just so amazing. The part where she says something like "if we could only zoom out our perspective on how relationships look like over time....". Huge respect of her work 🙌
@@borishudej691 what narcissists do is they don't feel emotional empathy so they don't naturally give love. They separate emotions from needs. Thus their needs become transactional. This person is expected to do this and I will do this in return. It's a contract. Teal is not subtle at all, she's projecting. This video is for her inner circle as a means to justify their living situation or the living situation she wants. It's very obvious from the examples she is giving. She's looking for validation from her viewers. I wasn't expecting this from this video. click bait. Teal I'm not going to be your flying monkey. Seriously, no one cares if you live a harem lifestyle. Sheesh. If anyone in her inner circle reads this, if you are unhappy reach out and leave. You are not a servant nor should you be treated like one just because Teal gives you a nice place to live. This video is so transparent it's awful. 😬
@@Alazar654hypergamy isn't feminism or the American feminist movement. Hypergamy deals with social status and caste systems when it comes to romantic relationships/marriages. Are you implying that women that have higher status or economic means in America are contributing to the increase in Narcissism? 🤨
I am completely shocked. Well done Teal!, you hit the spot and settled my thoughts. I was always around these ideas but it wasn't really clear in my mind. thanks
Wow, This video summarizes what I have felt about relationships for years. The reasons why traditional marriages don’t work because of the new roles of men and women in society. I recently got divorced after 30 years of marriage. Essentially our needs were not being met. Thank you for your explanation about this topic. It is very healing to understand the truth about relationships and how they need to be looked at!
Yes. Humans evolve but society as a larger unit also evolves as does life in general on a macro level that is far out of the hands of the individual to remotely change or remove themselves from. The individual only has so much power and as a whole we are definitely in an a major shift on a macro level which will unfortunately leave many individuals in its wake even if they did respond as best they could to their individual situation. Individuals do not like to agree with this because for a long time we have been told how powerful and important we are and that concept is sold by thieves and charlatans every day and also people do not like feeling powerless to a fate larger than them. It’s easier to deny that and eye-roll. When it comes down to it Nature is forever playing solitaire with herself and that means variety, change, evolution.
Teal & team! Please do an episode on the invention of dating apps and how it has affected human relationships, I wanna know about it from your (wider? higher?) perspective! Thank you
I can give you the male perspective if you are interested. Some very good looking and high status men get almost all the matches, while the average men get nothing.
@@gregorkerka1235I gave myself to some not so good looking and middle high status men and still they used and rejected me. They probably stay stuck in the thought that whatever they get isn’t good enough.
@@javireyes7333 I guess you are older than me. I should have told you my experience come from as a young man trying to date young women. Middle aged men surely have more options. Its annoying that those who want relationship struggle to get one, while others who have options dont want to commit.
Agree!! Why would you subject yourself to a life full of complete strangers and expose your child to what is a lack of real commitment and companionship.
As someone stuck with a monster who won’t sign divorce papers and lives to mock me and steal $… I wish I was alone. I wish I never met this monster. 12 years of jail. (Mental and spiritual jail).
Girl you speakin my language. This has been a recent awakening for me. I have tried to do the whole fall in love, move in and “settle” and I’m just not happy in that. I don’t want kids, I don’t want to be married and I want to travel and enjoy life. I don’t want to try to stay with someone for 30 years just for legacy. I am so so okay with being single and when I find a guy who aligns with these vibes it’s going to be a new experience for me!
Also a big lie. You can't socially construct a relationship - you build it based on the children's needs (and around the physical limitations) if you want to have a healthy family. This seemed like an effinist wish fulfillment. The reason why we have these so-called traditions is that those are the ways - or social technologies - that _actually worked_ and thus are the result of natural selection. Populations that go through these periods of mating chaos are soon replaced by others either demographically or by being conquered.
This was true in the reality that I chose to date people who didn’t love both their parents and came from broken homes. I’ve been dating a girl for a few years now that loves her parents and they’ve been together throughout her whole entire childhood up until now and they are still together and thriving. So my relationship with her is very easy because of that, and none of this that Teal is talking about in this video is my current reality anymore. Moral of the story, choose people who have had a good role model in terms of what marriage looks like, when you’re vetting someone new today make sure that they have a good relationship with both of their parents first.
@@vettie It’s more so about respect. Everyone is deserving of love and relationships. A man that cannot respect his mother is a man that will not respect women. A woman that cannot respect her father, is a woman that will not respect men & vice versa. In these cases, by default they will end up alone often and have more unfulfilling relationships. It also depends on what exactly you want, you can want the version of what relationship are like based on what teal is describing in this video, or you can want the traditional relationship where you want marriage and you want children the woman is more focused being a good wife and focused on raising the children while the father is the sole provider and being a good husband and a good father. I personally choose a woman that loves / respects her parents because my values are more in line with that route because I came from a broken home and told myself I’d build a healthy relationship that will last. It’s all personal preference, you choose whatever path suits you and your lifestyle.
The balance of light and dark, feminine and masculine within us all is necessary and trying to slowly occur. Balance is the essence of everything. A lot of good points here.
Correction, Dark=masculine, Shadow=feminine, Light=masculine, Wisdom=feminine . The original family= The heavenly Father(Dark) The heavenly Mother(shadow) The heavenly Son(Light) and the heavenly daughter (Wisdom). Positive(Masculinity) negative (femininity). All Males are the incarnation of the Original Male(The Dark/Void). All Females are the incarnation of the original Female(Shadow/chaos) Also known as the first creation of the Void.
Contrast is the essence and balance is what we are trying to achieve between the 2 contrasting and opposite polarities. Without the 2 contrasting sides you have nothing to balance anyway. And people are terrified of contrast because that means something seemingly a total opposite. People get defensive and start compulsively yapping their own perceived stance because they must cling to something for fear of being swept away by the unknown thing that is different. Maybe. I don’t really know but I do know what I’m talking about but on Saturday nights I pontificate and ramble. 😂
You and I are on the same wavelength about almost everything so far. Including the big picture/variables. I've been too scared to speak up like you I'm so terrified of being seen. Not so much from childhood trauma. But from the last four and a half years. Sure did open my eyes to a lot of things
The worst possible outcome for the children's mental development is to be without their father. You can see this in statistics. It's the socialist fantasy to have this breakdown of family - and it never ever worked anywhere. Even the USSR went back to traditional roles after trying this chaos (what we're going through now) for decades.
70-90% of male genome will disappear in the upcoming generations. Self-development is pointless if it doesn't lead to family creation and healthy offspring.
This video makes so much sense yet a lot of people really are not self aware of how a relationship should look like and it is so hard for me to understand why. It is common sense, it is logical yet a lot of people really cant grasp this concept.
There's been a lot of emotional disconnect. Usually we learn love from our mothers. Our parents, grandparents, family and community are meant to teach us how to love. Lately we've become very disconnected and nobody is "there" a sense of community is lost with this new generation.
I have feeling it’s about our core wound of rejection and all other things like fear that sets in on molecular level when woman gets pregnant in this scary world for both parents and that energy stays with us and is universal almost especially in modern world!✌️
I’d love for Teal to make a video about ROCD (Relationship OCD). My husband told me he has it a couple of years ago then kind of backtracked, however given some of his behaviours I would say he shows signs. I have felt so unattractive around him as a result. It’s crushing when you know your partner is struggling with OCD that surrounds whether or not you are good enough for them, attractive enough or if they actually love you. I know it’s a real condition but it’s maddening for the partner. Would love some insight on this.
Thank you for this video. I realize that I've been challenging the 20th century paradigm of relationships without quite knowing it. The man expected me to behave on certain ways amd I would oblige to "keep" him for my security but I cld never keep the status quo. I need comment but freedom at the same time. I can now be more intentional about what I need/want on relationship and no longer be submissive to what the other needs or wants if not compatible.
I'm happy alone. I've learned to be comfortable in my single sovereignty and have instilled that in my son after his mother left us when he was 3. He 20 and now well adjusted for this chaotic world. He understands that another person doesn't complete him.
My newest and best relationship is wonderful. He's a bit shy, and for more serious conversations happen over the phone. My poor guy had a messed up abusive relationship. I respect his choices and also one day our plans went away, he apologized and took full responsibility and flinched. When he apologized he was so sweet and didn't want to disappoint me. When he flinched, I didn't have the heart to be mad, I also hugged him, thanked him, and suggested we regroup for a different plan. I live this man, I never want to hurt him, and I compliment him on all the things I love that he does.
I have a friend in a similar situation to that of 'Parker.' The discontent and anxiety over at that camp is palpable. It's still working, but I always get the sense that if someone sneezes the whole operation will fold.
No way, I found they best partner in my life. He adores, he likes my structure. We are flawed,.. but it is a perfect fit. Still strong after 3 years, it is forever with him.
I absolutely 💜 teal. This video just summarised.my thought process over the last few months and I keep thinking how I could help people see this about relationships. I spent 10 yrs learning about relationships academically and personally and my conclusion is in this video. I found the systems was not working in my own relationship and I needed to create something new. My partner is still in the matrix but I am finding that as I change and expose him to different ideas, we've been able to find a new rhythm. But u will go through a lot on imbalance and uncertainty. Often u will feel like break up is the only option. But it is so worth the work to change dynamics and challenge the status quo.
So refreshing to see that leaders can reflect snd update their teachings. That they see and truly know that there is no one way to be human. And no “right” way to be human.
I do not agree with this at all. In short, today's relationships have lost their meaning, where the place of we has been replaced by me. It's normal that it doesn't work because when we remove the family as the foundation of everything, we turn away from what should be. The Internet is not a safe place, but then again, as humans, we seek connection with others, that's why we write comments.
@selmasvast9911 I come from a large family, all with parents, aunts and uncles who are all married and then if you look at the children, myself, and all of my cousins, none of us are married but we are all much happier with our partnerships and friendships than our parents' are with their marriages (our parents are used to arguing/fighting in the privacy of their homes, and then pretending to be happy couples in pictures and around others, but then complaining or making gossipy, envious comments about others). When me and my cousins all get together with our partners, we are chill, positive, happy for one another - doesn't matter if someone's gay, or has two partners, or has a different partner every week, we actually truly support one another and are there for each other. So it really depends on what "family values" mean, because our parents (gen Xers, boomers) were trying for a model of following the bible and traditional values, but none of us feel accepted or love, and they don't even feel it themselves within their own marriages, they just say they do, but then we kids have to suffer their arguments behind closed doors. Meanwhile, we saw that, decided nope -- and live a more free and accepting lifestyle, but then we're all actually supportive of one another, actually positive, actually trying to grow and be better people - that's real connection and family to me. Also nothing against the bible/traditional values - I think that if people value that, and value the people in their life, than that is wonderful. But for the case of my family, they were disrespecting the people in their life and using the bible to hide behind, that's super shitty.
@@selmasvast9911 Today's relationships have lost their meaning because their meaning didn't meet the needs of the people. "We" has been replaced by "me" for the exact same reason. You want those two values back? Either they adapt to meet our needs or they die off.
@@DaAxiomatic Monkey see, monkey do is not a need - it is surrogate BS. But one thing is for sure, if people who carry contemporary culture don't wisen up fast, we will all pay the ultimate price, and indeed - die off. That is all that will happen. There will be no new norm based on today's vapid nonsense that has a chance at succeeding.
@@audy2174 true. The Dune movies have made me think that, like the Bene Gesserits planting plans since the beginning of time, maybe our current religion/s have been planted to "brainwash" people. In fact, the Bible only has one agenda, to keep the human race reproducing. And then there's a lot of DON'Ts. Like, how are we going to experience the fullness of human potential if we restrict ourselves from doing maximal things per restrictions from the Bible?
Superb! The second part of this video is brilliant. I've noticed these things in myself and my relationships throughout the years. Unconditional love/seeking love and relationships are fundamentally different things. I've grown up being lied to by parents, society and the same Disney movies (also romantic movies and media in general). I learned a lot from Teal about relationships but also a lot of it resonates with me based on my experience and observations. Relationships are fundamentally transactional. Every person's set of needs is different, hence every person's desired relationship is different. Authenticity and honesty with oneself are paramount. Compatibility and reciprocity are crucial. Better alone than in an unfulfilling relationahip that doesn't meet our needs. Thank you, Teal! ❤
Before judging any relationship one should ask two questions: - Is it working for the couple, no matter if straight, gay, married or just "living together"? - Does the relationship cause any harm to another sentient being? If the answer to question1 is Yes and the answer to question2 is No. Great!
I agree, but keep in mind that kids are "sentient beings." Too many poly people just handwave away the damage that polygamy does to kids. Of course if no kids are involved, go ahead.
As always Teal there you go again blowing the roof of the house this was very intuitive and insightful of you as you always are and for me age 69 without any relationship or real desire for 1 due to my failed choices I apprecilove all that you stated.🎉❤
Many good points here, Thank you Teal. Personally I think that the main reason to be in a relationship should simply be companionship. Find people you love, that you love to be around. The more needs and conditions you have to stay in a relationship creates disharmony. It’s no longer about being a yin and a yang - it’s about having your own inner balance and independence. This isn’t a bad thing.
Sure things need to be reimagined but that doesn’t mean undoing everything. Monogamy is definitely ideal. It’s success comes down to the individuals authenticity and good faith, when looking for a person to enter relationship with. It’s always going to come down to the individual, not problems inherent in certain structures. I promise being polyamorous and or swinging isn’t going to be good for your kids or your relationship with your person, or yourself. The idea that two people can truly love each other and go to a swingers party to watch their person be as physically intimate as possible with another person is truly laughable. I think Teal is just too horny and wants to normalize that sort of behavior lol
Mantak Chia's teachings on the Taoist conception of sex and love...beginning in the 1970's...has been a major transformational shift. This knowledge was previously held secret until Mantak's disclosure to the public. Right now still somewhat obscure...but will probably continue to gain momentum in years and decades to come.
22:44 are they thriving? Maybe they are, but sounds like just a NEW Disney tale that didn’t look at the realities/stressors and complex emotions that will arise. So they MAY be thriving. And maybe for a while, but there’s a lot under that rug too.
Beautiful video! I love this topic and all the points made. I myself have had this conversation with many of my friends and partners. Some people agree, others look at me crazy. But at the end of the day, I believe its vital for everyone to learn how to customize and create their own life that works for them. Wipe your programming, start with a clean slate, and follow your bliss.
I love you Teal and I normally agree with absolutely everything you say if not sit with a pen and paper to take notes. And that includes the first half of this video, your analysis of the problem is 100% on the money. I struggle to imagine the suggestions to be very successful though, for the same reason that war is still unavoidable. I.e. the spiritual maturity level of most people. When you genuinely care about universal love, there is always an explanation and solutions. But that necessitates everybody being on the same page. I know of one "seemingly successful" Mr Mom type arrangements and many, many others that failed miserably. I personally think that steering our new modern dating styles in a different way would be better. For example women shouldn't be waiting until in their 30s to have kids, men should be expecting themselves to make enough money to at least be the primary provider, a man who makes the decisions respects himself and is respected by his partner. My suggestion is to honour your gender first and make exceptions later. If you're a man be a provider first and homemaker second, and if you're a woman be a mother first and a professional second. Everyone can have what they want but if we honour the truth of masculine and feminine roles we all do much better than if we don't. Thanks for the video though it's really helpful to keep having this conversation with the public in a productive manner. Keep doing what you do Teal! 💙
Great job in researching this narrative. Everything will change, we must adapt to the changes. Important to remember is need for connections is vital for human existence.
Everything will stay the same since reality binds us. All these values-liberal attempts will disappear due to demographic reasons, and everything will go back to religious and family-oriented - if enough people survive this craziness.
@edheldude YOUR first sentence spilled the beans.True, we are binded by a reality; also we walk with reality everyday. We come to forks in the road, we must make choices. Sending us off into another reality. Reality is here and there ,to stay .We have to chose our livable reality...
@@larrymorrison1025 But over time these individual attempts will be culled by natural selection, and you'll be left with "a tradition" that works the best. Demographics determine the future.
I really appreciate the way you itemized out each of these alterations in societal norms during this time of transition. I always enjoy hearing your very unique perspective and your ability to precisely explore the realities of what is happening around us. Great video!
Relationships aren't about societal norms - they're about survival of the fittest over a long period of time. The traditions we have are social technologies that solved mating problems so successfully we created these high cultures. There is no high culture without focus on family and spirituality. This me me me stuff doesn't work, and all of these relationship deconstructions have been tried already. They didn't survive.
Uuuuhhhh... You have update us with much needed awareness for this time. Thank you so much Teal for your video, information, help, and education. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ I love youuuuuuuu. Btw, I always brag you to my friend as a legit source for spiritual and awareness content
I love you. ❤ So happy you made this video as I've been trying to understand what is the right romantic relationships configuration for me. And kept asking for a video about that. 🙏 And this video makes me realize I cannot just listen to coaches or people's advice, but truly tap into what is my deepest truths and those might still be subconscious to me. Thank you for the kick in the ass to be more sovereign and creating my life as is authentic to my individuality. You're the best. 🔥❤
I've been given that example and I absolutely hate that🤷. I do not want to get super independent at a very young age because for what? I love my parents and they are very important for me and it is also important to have a repaired relationship with them. Trying to get super independent as fast as possible devastated my whole nervous system 🤯.
Thats exactly how I feel. Id rather be alone if he is not gonna work, if hes not going to help me. Im doing everything. Studying, working, taking care of the kids, cleaning the house. I get tired. Im trying to communicate more and I had to learn to put my love to the side and become transactional.
The only relationship model I want is to find a man that will love me back and being with him outside civilization living off the land because at this point, I dont care for the sick society anymore.
It is very hard to meet our needs outside of civilization . If you can find a man to love you who has a similar dream you can find a new way within the constraints of nature and economics.
Let's be clear. Most harems existed in a time and geographical area, where it was not consentual. They were brothel sex slaves, bought and sold, often to men of high economic social status. I wouldn't call that a style of relationship.
I’m 43 and single with no kids or really friends. I stay to myself most times. At first it made me feel lonely and I looked at everyone else’s relationships with each other then once I started really paying to their interactions I realize most people only tolerate each other… they create this imagine if the person in their head and interact with that imagine while not really seeing the real person in front of them… and the continuously do and say things that hurt each other jit because they either justify or deny their behavior …but because they are quick to say I love you , suddenly everything is magically okay… love has became a description instead of a verb. I know that even myself that I isolate from others isn’t healthy and I’m working on that but atleast I can say it’s my honest reality that I’m not trying to dismiss… all these good people waking around harming everything and everyone
Every relationship is unique is my takeaway and it takes communication and understanding of values to explore happiness together and what that looks like for you. I’ve gotten into the habit lately of comparing what my family life looks like to others posting on social media and it can make you feel not enough/sad, but it’s so flawed and I have to redirect myself to what is going well in my own life and family and gratitude
People overanalyze. It leaves them with empty hands and overflowing heads. People need to stop this minmaxing. It is a game concept, not a viable way to experience life.
No relationship is unique. People are 99% the same and it only seems complex because you're focusing on "your happiness" instead of having the frame of family creation. People have worked together since the dawn of time but now everyone speaks themselves out of their main biological function, reproduction.
@@edheldude I don’t think so. Everyone has different levels of trauma and experiences and personalities. Not everyone wants the same thing and it’s a beautiful thing that people have a choice today. Ancestral trauma is also more embedded with the later generations.
Could you do an episode on the low birth rate / low fertility rate trend? I myself am childfree and so are most people I know. I’m curious about Teal’s perspective on this trend that is becoming more and more mainstream and prevalent
My thoughts (also childfree)…I am one of the very few women in my line who has had the opportunity to experience a life that I choose, that is about freedom to follow my intuition and desires and not about raising children or devoting my life to another (a child). I’m honored to be in this position, to be able to choose and shape my life in a way many have not been able to. Looking at this from the perspective of the universe-it Is experience! And a rare form of experience…that is one of my contributions to the universal knowledge
You've adopted the values system that leads to that. You were instructed to remove yourself, and you believed it. It's like getting a serious radiation poisoning. You think you're ok but your body is unable to reproduce, i.e. fulfill it's main biological function.
@@jeez297 For some, sure. But she didn't talk about living in a community with space and nature, she talked about a flat, Friends'style. Try ask her to swap her villas with that and a bunch of kids ...
@@jeez297 We evolved to share our living spaces and the care of children with people of our own tribes, whom we've known all our lives, not some random strangers that we have to vet like in a job interview.
James Lindsey has a lot to say about this- (though I disagree with him on lots). Part of it is natural. Part of it is a purposeful attempt to radicalize the youth-the first step is to turn them against older generations, separating them from the people who care about and protect them 💜 so they can then be groomed as tools
Thank you for this thought provoking video. One significant element contributing to the breakdown of traditional relationships that wasn't mentioned is that modern women have achieved great equality in the sense of rights and social standing, but many still reject the idea of equal responsibilities. A minor example would be the expectation in 2024 for a man to still pay for everything, which I've unfortunately discovered is shockingly common. Nothing justifies such an attitude, it is simply greed and a sense of entitlement. The modern dating landscape looks to me like a bunch of selfish people just looking out for themselves, it is sad.
@@leannaprather2258 They are. As soon as women said they don't care about men and what they want, they transformed themselves into something that doesn't fit together with healthy masculinity. That's why there's so many single mothers too.
Incase you'd rather read about it instead and want to dive deeper into today's topic: tealswan.vip/workbooks
The best breakdown on the Web IMHO. Bravo!
I remember your episode of millionaire matchmaker with Zagros from like 2003! Sucks I can't find it anywhere online at all anymore!
Ok boomer-
I'm curious if my comment was removed by UA-cam, you Ma'am or if it was pending for your approval.Please let me know at your end.This censorship by progressives is out of control.
@@TealSwanOfficial really low vibrational people
Essentially, I need to find someone, who has my level of self-honesty.
That person exists, you need to align yourself with uniting with them within your own being. Then you'll, meet without searching for each other.
The question really is if you truly are being honest or are you mentally ill.
Because diet is the basis behind all of this mass mental psychosis.
@@Bonsqueesquee ua-cam.com/users/shortsxhRA3waSU34?si=pUKz5o4YQQQtUlrh
There was a video in Australia they tested 180 women experiencing stress during pregnancy
1. Women who reacted positivelly to stress,...which means the stress decreased
their kids didnt have any mental or physical issues after the birth
2. Women who reacted negativelly to stress during pregnancy
or they experienced long term stress and anxiety
their kids had to visit the doctors the first years of childhood.
because her body released a stress hormones that get into her blood and into the fetus.
I guess if there would be some yoga or pilates classes for pregnant women, where women relax in relaxing positions, exercise their body
feel less pain from pregnancy, release stress, pressure do some spa healing or some sound haeling etc
maybe this holistic approach would help women.
So husbands should be patient with their women during pegnancy,
because she becomes easily tired from pregnancy, also being loving husband
and women should be also careful and avoid stress, or find a specialist, if they have anxiety.
There was a video in Australia they tested 180 women experiencing stress during pregnancy
1. Women who reacted positivelly to stress,...which means the stress decreased
their kids didnt have any mental or physical issues after the birth
2. Women who reacted negativelly to stress during pregnancy
or they experienced long term stress and anxiety
their kids had to visit the doctors the first years of childhood.
because her body released a stress hormones that get into her blood and into the fetus.
I guess if there would be some yoga or pilates classes for pregnant women, where women relax in relaxing positions, exercise their body
feel less pain from pregnancy, release stress, pressure do some spa healing or some sound haeling etc
maybe this holistic approach would help women.
So husbands should be patient with their women during pegnancy,
because she becomes easily tired from pregnancy, also being loving husband
and women should be also careful and avoid stress, or find a specialist, if they have anxiety.
Just some observations as I've struggled with this exact thing: Dating apps turn humans into brands at best or literally act as pimps at worst. The introduction of hookup culture and "corn" has destroyed so much of our culture socially. It's created the illusion of unlimited options and perfect matches. It has also cheapened long term relationships and the sacred nature of intercourse. Polyamory may destigmatize a reality in which humans have complex physical and emotions needs, but it will not address underlying feelings of insecure or avoidant attachment and will act as a lightning rod to draw those in, as well as narcissists looking for a never ending supply. Due to the Coolidge effect, I'm not convinced of the ability to maintain loyalty without resentment bubbling up. Absolutely nobody should be in a relationship with someone who resents them for asking for the bare minimum of commitment. I am not interested in hooking up. I never was, I never will be. I would never cheapen my energy like that. If I'm being honest, serial monogamy just feels like polyamory with more steps. I'm not looking for a companion or experience. I'm looking for a life partner to build with. Someone safe. Someone who can compartmentalize when to be tough and when to be soft. Someone who values growth as a person. Someone who shares my values of longevity, instead of looking where the grass is greener when things get tough. Someone who doesn't suffer from the demons of addiction or believe the world revolves around their wants. Someone who sees the values of responsibility and who would sacrifice now for a better tomorrow. Someone not driven by hedonism, but by care and compassion for others. Someone with hope, instead of nihilism. I am indifferent about having children, because most women I see having them end up as single parents. I am never going to put myself in that position. Children need fathers. Good, present, compassionate fathers. The world is hard. It's easier when we face it together and remember we are on the same team. Choose for values. Don't choose for infatuation masquerading as love. Love is not just a feeling. It's a bond maintained by action of sacrifice. It's also not fair to ask unconditional love of anyone, other than yourself. We read our intentions, but judge the world by its actions. In reality, everyone should be judged by action alone, not hiding behind principles. Good men and good women exist. Now to have a good relationship, we just have to stop being so afraid of each other.
@@indigoneutral 🐲 thank you for that post... it resonates very much... partially perceived as paradox, but still it triggers my most inner aspects. 🤔
🙏🏻🧘🏻♂️🙏🏻
Well stated 🙏🏼🪷
Wow. Thank you. Beautifully wise and articulate. You speak my soul and thought as a fellow woman traveller of these complex realms.
This is all I would look for in a relationship. Thank you for saying this so beautifully
@@indigoneutral In acknowledging that the world is hard, you've inadvertently validated why dating apps and hookup culture exist, as well as why the cultural elements you value are being destroyed:
In a hard world, people want their needs to be achievable enough based on where they're at. If that's not possible, they'll either make it easier or give up on/destroy the whole thing.
The cultural elements you value don't meet the needs of many, and are thus being devalued accordingly.
I want to share my story. My mother and father were married in a traditional marriage, which means that my mother does not work and my father is the provider, but they are not happy and have been quarreling a lot recently. My mother decided to give up everything and do whatever my father wants because divorce is difficult for women in our society. Their problem is that they are not the same and One of them must submit to the other in order for the relationship to continue on the surface level. Many people in my country suffer from problems in their relationships due to incompatibility. Everyone is forced into one mold. What Teal says is really important, and I read an unfortunate comment that believes that the solution is old traditional relationships, or that women’s work is the reason, but this is not true. I live in a traditional society, and relationships do not work here either.
If you're posting comments on UA-cam, you don't live in a traditional society.
@JeffCaplan313 What? People with traditional values can be modern and have things like the internet and running toilets.
@@JeffCaplan313you want a caliphate? Move to Afghanistan to find a wife then.
@@user-qb4eb8vq5uBeside the point. Divorce isn’t an option, it seems. Patience and compromise, also doesn’t seem apparent. Couples in the past made and agreement when they got married to put up with each other’s idiosyncratic behavior. It appears this is not the bar anymore and people abdicate or they don’t talk about it in a healthy way in order up seek resolution. Lack of trust and respect brings this. This fear is the motivation for EVERYTHING whether someone knows it or the fear is subconscious. Hormones are the key to every thought, feeling and action for all of us. Psychobiologically, I mean. The rest is our egos and our identities.
@@OneMountainNinelet’s remember, none of this should be dictated by law. Legislation cannot correct difficult relationships and women tend to be on the losing side when this is attempted.
I am trying to analyse my personal story in the context of this video. My marriage was very "customised". Both my husband and valued honesty. We thought we could have a long term marriage - planned for the long haul - happily ever after. Went to swingers parties as didn’t want each to miss out and always wander - what if. Thought we could have it all while being in a commited, loving, supportive relationship. We had a child 13 years into our relationship. She's five now, so we've been together for 18 years. And now we are divorcing after all that effort. I am the initiator. Things started to get out of hand after we've purchased a beautiful apartment together. He got involved with another woman and couldn't keep boundaries on that relationship. Started to devalue me and abuse me emotionally. I was perpetually busy with all the responsibilities of raising our child, household chores and full time job, while he had the freedom to "entertainin" himself. I complained for the period of 10 months, saying its not going to end well. I dont know what he thought of me - that I'd be his door mat since I valued unconditional love and marriage. Maybe he thought I wouldn't leave so he could abuse me.
The moral of the story - if both people want to, they'll make the relationship work and last. It takes two. I think it doesn't matter what model of relationship we pick. Unfortunately, when we get involved with another person we take a risk. There are no guarantees in any scenario. I think that perhaps to be authentic, we shouldn't allow ourselves to be abused and practice self love. The goal is not to have a relationship last forever but perhaps to learn and evolve. Let go easier if it doesn't work.
That's excellent. I don't want it if I'm sure it won't work, though.
Wow - that’s quite a ride. I am sorry. Truly. imagine that if and when you get into another relationship, you are going to have clarity about what you want/don’t want. In the meantime, hopefully you’ll love yourself up. One thing is for sure, you learned a lot and this will never happen to you again. Too, you are (still) the prize, so please don’t lose sight of that. XOXO
@@coreycox2345 Thank you for your comment. "Don't want it if I'm sure it won't work". If I undersnad you correctly, yeah sure why get into something if it's not for you. Societal pressure to be in a relationship? One of the models Teal mentioned is to be single. We can have several fulfilling relationships that don't have to be romantic. Even if its romantic but doesn't last yet it is fulfilling for both, why not. Another thing is about taking the risk - having our heart open and being vulnerable to being hurt. Betrayal can come from anyone - close family even. It depends what we take from it - learn and evolve, heal ourself and help others heal.
@@andrew.gardinerhey, thank you for your comment and your heartfelt message. Yes, one thing this ride taught me is to heal from my own traumas by standing up for myself and being more authentic rather than people pleasing. I learned that there are no guarantees, no matter how hard I try. I am ok with being vulnerable to hurt and betrayal - such is a human experience. I won't let fear of it rule my life though - I am much more than that. I can (still) have a good life - I did not betray myself or anyone else so I can live with my conscience.
Wish you all the best as well 😉
After 18 years your value has gone way down and his has gone up. He has the right to explore partners who aren't old, used, and nagging
If you’re intelligent, financially independent and have self reverence, you won’t fall for a poor bargain and if things change, you won’t hesitate leaving.
Amen, that is exactly what I did!
PERIOD
In that order and you can’t remove even 1of those
The problem is entitled women
Yes keep leaving those women men! Man power!!!
We prevent a person's authentic expression when we don't allow them to say uncomfortable things to us or in our presence. 😂😂😂😂
Lol sad unfortunate truth
also, it’s important that both people in the dynamic are allowed to say uncomfortable things in the other’s presence.
You are always allowed to say whatever you want. It’s our partner’s response that we fear and that fear makes us decide to keep quiet.
@@shelbyphan7771 you're right, sometimes it's like that.
This has ramifications
1 the fear it's created through conditioning from other relations or just learning how others react to certain things in general etc.
2 the fear is a result of your current partner conditioning it... well that's how the partner actually decided what you are "allowed" to say 🤷
3 the fear is a result of social conditioning using propaganda and even punishment under law... Like for example in some countries, if you call fat a fat person you can be sued 🤷 This is another way someone else decides what you're "allowed" to say or not.
4 you can fear hurting the other person unnecessarily, when you care for them, by saying something that actually doesn't really matter that much to you. Fear is not always bad. Love is all inclusive, therefore includes fear 🤷 Fear is not necessarily opposing love. It's a matter of balance 🤷
Basically putting a bullseye on our face.
I just visited my Aunty and Uncle who are in their late 70s who I haven't seen since my brother's funeral... they are celebrating 55 years of marriage! Which is rare. I listened to his life story and from a very young age, he was abandoned by his own mother at the age of 7, who ran off with another man. They just live in harmony with each other. I love seeing them.
It's not rare to be married 50+ years.
Modern people are becoming more selfish that's why they jump from person to person.
The "I'm not happy" mantra of modern women is destroying society.
My parents - currently 54 years married
Grandparents - 50+
Aunt & Uncle - 50+
Aunt & Uncle - 50+
Aunt & Uncle - 50+
Aunt & Uncle - 50+
Aunt & Uncle - 40+
Aunt & Uncle - 40+
Aunt & Uncle - 40+
Aunt & Uncle - 40+
Aunt & Uncle - 30+
Aunt & Uncle - 30+
Aunt - married 3 times
Aunt - married 2 times
Grandma - married 5 times - you guessed it, the 2 Aunts that did the divorcing came from this grandma
@ronmexico8383 it's great the you have examples of long term marriages. However, just because your family has those examples doesn't mean it's not rare in the overall scheme of things. It means 50+ year marriages are common for you. Zoom out.
You can be married for 50+ years and still be unhappy or abused but unable to leave because you are financially dependent on your spouse.
Duration of marriage isn't the only metric of a happy relationship
@@ronmexico8383 most of these marriages last because women arent allowed to leave when harmed.
@@ronmexico8383 people have always been extremely selfish, that is not new. i wish i could be as naive and stupid to truly think being selfish and evil is a new thing
My girlfriend just enjoy lying next to each other or sitting next to each other. We have no other expectation except that we enjoy being in each other's company. It's a VERY simple model.
What about financial responsibility? Do you pay for everything?
We just got back from a weekend get away. I paid for dinner on Friday. Then Saturday night she wanted to pay. Sure fine. No problem. We both have jobs.
Life demands growth
@@matthewmichaelcrown3643Ugh. I hate it when life does that!
I feel like people aren’t satisfied or appreciative of what they have. It’s not easy finding a partner you truly get along with who has integrity, is honest, etc. but once they have it they always feel they can do better
@@DHarma1923 Progress requires dissatisfaction.
@@DaAxiomatic meaningless comment in this context.
Exactly this and I've seen it from both men and women. A woman will find a good man and be happy but after a while, she wonders if she can do better so she tries to climb the ladder to what she thinks is a better man only to realize the grass isn't greener on the other side and she just ruined the good relationship she had. Likewise, a man will find a nice cute girl and be happy but then he gets greedy and arrogant and thinks I can get a hotter girl and ends up ruining his relationship.
@@jibberism9910 It's meaningful. And also not something we wanna acknowledge due to rejecting the fact that pain is a fundamental part of life.
@@Cookiesrfood Cliches. If they wonder about what else is out there, the relationship was never right or satisfying in the first place.
How are you always reading my mind? The timing of your videos is phenomenal and reminds me that my individual concerns are shared with everyone - you are TUNED IN.
No
FINALLY someone is bringing up the current housing fiasco. Thank you for that.
Very accurate analysis. I am a sociologist ans historian. She’s on point there.
Same in Australia
Everyone ls been talking about it 🤨
How could a system created in 1944 with the Bretton Woods agreement possibly have predicted the population growth and planned to provide housing for larger future generations? With what resources would they have acted and to what end?
@@Ac90854 Bretton Woods ended in 1971.
Teal is one of one. There is nobody else like her doing this work.
Yes! I've been saying that last bit so much. If everyone can just be honest with themselves and what they truly want out of life it would be the most gorgeous thing we've ever seen. If you start being honest with yourself you can find an honest partner who matches the same frequency!! ❤
Know yourself first.
Love yourself first.
Everything else is SECOND
You _are_ everything else. and everything is a part of you
We actually know ourselves within relationship… That's why it's so hard
I disagree
“Love yourself first” sounds like a recipe for selfishness. I would replace that with “Respect yourself first”. Then “find some bigger ideal to which you should subjugate yourself to in the pursuit of meaning”. That can be a number of things: career, society, a cause, family etc. I do believe we should not try to pursue happiness but contentment in life. Happiness is the extra toping on top that creeps up on you. Sounds like what Jordan Peterson would say, still i subscribe to that ethos.
@@teomosu Loving oneself first is not selfishness. The reason most relationships end up failing is because people are looking for another person to fill a gap in their lives. They're hoping that another person's "love" will complete them and make up for their own feelings of abandonment, lack of self-respect unworthiness or insecurity. Since nobody can ever live up to or fulfill those expectations, the relationship eventually disintegrates.
A healthy, loving relationship can only happen when two emotionally healthy people come together. That means people who have worked through and healed their traumas, people who have come to love and respect themselves and really get to know who they are.
All relationships teach us something about ourselves. And not all relationships are meant to last forever because people grow and change and sometimes people grow apart and that's ok.
That said, the healthiest relationships imo are the ones where two people come together because they choose to share their lives, not because they NEED the other for whatever reason.
Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.
Its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 5 years ended, but i couldn't just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back.
Intriguing! I'm curious, how did you find a spiritual counselor, and what's the most effective way for me to reach him?
Meet Owen Abiola, a renowned spiritual counselor acclaimed for his talent in bringing back ex-partners.
Thank you for this valuable information.
Dr Owen abiola is a very powerful man
The best examples of relationships that I saw in my life were so simple and yet so hard. I mean people who fixed most of their red flags instead of using them to disqualify. These people grew old and gray holding their hands while being gentle but firm with each other.
I always had the perception that their love for each other was Godly, unconditional and faithful, and maybe that holy unworldly energy was the fuel for life's transactions and hardships.
God bless! 🙏
Wow Best comment in this thread
@@javireyes7333 ❤️ thank you!
If those people want to fix the red flags yes…
@@javireyes7333 thank you! ❤️
@@Lifeofadognowotherwise it's wasted time
The first part of this video is probably the best synopsis of what is going on with the state of relationships in 2024. On a personal note, I am 52m never married and no kids; it's just so much easier and less stressful this way.
As always, Teal puts very abstract concepts pulled from science and research into "human readable form". I come from medical/psychtherapy background and I read a lot of scientific literature on topics that Teal is talking about.... but I'm always envious on how she's able to put it right. When I talk about such things... to most people it just sounds boring. There is a paper on this in evolutionary psychology recently published by Danish scientist. But the way Teal puts things together.... is just so amazing. The part where she says something like "if we could only zoom out our perspective on how relationships look like over time....".
Huge respect of her work 🙌
This could all be summarized by simply stating that narcissism is on the rise. That’s it.
No doubt. All relationships are transactional
@@neveragain733Narcissism is about extreme selfishness, not transactions. But its subtle.. like most gurus.
that's what happens when you let hypergamy free. (feminism)
@@borishudej691 what narcissists do is they don't feel emotional empathy so they don't naturally give love. They separate emotions from needs. Thus their needs become transactional. This person is expected to do this and I will do this in return. It's a contract.
Teal is not subtle at all, she's projecting. This video is for her inner circle as a means to justify their living situation or the living situation she wants. It's very obvious from the examples she is giving. She's looking for validation from her viewers.
I wasn't expecting this from this video. click bait. Teal I'm not going to be your flying monkey. Seriously, no one cares if you live a harem lifestyle. Sheesh.
If anyone in her inner circle reads this, if you are unhappy reach out and leave. You are not a servant nor should you be treated like one just because Teal gives you a nice place to live.
This video is so transparent it's awful. 😬
@@Alazar654hypergamy isn't feminism or the American feminist movement. Hypergamy deals with social status and caste systems when it comes to romantic relationships/marriages.
Are you implying that women that have higher status or economic means in America are contributing to the increase in Narcissism? 🤨
I am completely shocked. Well done Teal!, you hit the spot and settled my thoughts. I was always around these ideas but it wasn't really clear in my mind. thanks
Wow, This video summarizes what I have felt about relationships for years. The reasons why traditional marriages don’t work because of the new roles of men and women in society. I recently got divorced after 30 years of marriage. Essentially our needs were not being met. Thank you for your explanation about this topic. It is very healing to understand the truth about relationships and how they need to be looked at!
Yes. Humans evolve but society as a larger unit also evolves as does life in general on a macro level that is far out of the hands of the individual to remotely change or remove themselves from. The individual only has so much power and as a whole we are definitely in an a major shift on a macro level which will unfortunately leave many individuals in its wake even if they did respond as best they could to their individual situation. Individuals do not like to agree with this because for a long time we have been told how powerful and important we are and that concept is sold by thieves and charlatans every day and also people do not like feeling powerless to a fate larger than them. It’s easier to deny that and eye-roll. When it comes down to it Nature is forever playing solitaire with herself and that means variety, change, evolution.
A must-watch for everyone struggling with relationshios and social norms right now.
Thanks Teal
Teal & team! Please do an episode on the invention of dating apps and how it has affected human relationships, I wanna know about it from your (wider? higher?) perspective!
Thank you
I can give you the male perspective if you are interested. Some very good looking and high status men get almost all the matches, while the average men get nothing.
Good idea
@@gregorkerka1235I gave myself to some not so good looking and middle high status men and still they used and rejected me. They probably stay stuck in the thought that whatever they get isn’t good enough.
@@javireyes7333 I guess you are older than me. I should have told you my experience come from as a young man trying to date young women. Middle aged men surely have more options. Its annoying that those who want relationship struggle to get one, while others who have options dont want to commit.
Yessss pleassse
The relationship example at the end of the video sounded like a nightmare. Would rather be alone forever.
Agree!! Why would you subject yourself to a life full of complete strangers and expose your child to what is a lack of real commitment and companionship.
I think her point was just that there's other options out there
A nightmare for you, a dream to another.
@@jackalx2154 well said, it sounds like a great idea!
As someone stuck with a monster who won’t sign divorce papers and lives to mock me and steal $…
I wish I was alone. I wish I never met this monster. 12 years of jail. (Mental and spiritual jail).
Girl you speakin my language. This has been a recent awakening for me. I have tried to do the whole fall in love, move in and “settle” and I’m just not happy in that. I don’t want kids, I don’t want to be married and I want to travel and enjoy life. I don’t want to try to stay with someone for 30 years just for legacy. I am so so okay with being single and when I find a guy who aligns with these vibes it’s going to be a new experience for me!
Just curious how old are you?
@@Femininemusic571 26
I had a blast on my 20. My thirties have been awful 😢
@@Femininemusic571 I’m 26, almost 27
@@carolinapadron1486why?
people often negatively judge and shame people for desiring what they were taught to believe is normal and what to expect
Her chuckle always gets me… thank you 🙏🏽 ❤
possibly the most important work you've done to date - a really well thought out, structured and delivered piece - thank you Teal
Also a big lie. You can't socially construct a relationship - you build it based on the children's needs (and around the physical limitations) if you want to have a healthy family. This seemed like an effinist wish fulfillment. The reason why we have these so-called traditions is that those are the ways - or social technologies - that _actually worked_ and thus are the result of natural selection. Populations that go through these periods of mating chaos are soon replaced by others either demographically or by being conquered.
This was true in the reality that I chose to date people who didn’t love both their parents and came from broken homes. I’ve been dating a girl for a few years now that loves her parents and they’ve been together throughout her whole entire childhood up until now and they are still together and thriving. So my relationship with her is very easy because of that, and none of this that Teal is talking about in this video is my current reality anymore. Moral of the story, choose people who have had a good role model in terms of what marriage looks like, when you’re vetting someone new today make sure that they have a good relationship with both of their parents first.
So people who have tumultuous relationships with their parents should remain alone?
@@vettie It’s more so about respect. Everyone is deserving of love and relationships.
A man that cannot respect his mother is a man that will not respect women. A woman that cannot respect her father, is a woman that will not respect men & vice versa. In these cases, by default they will end up alone often and have more unfulfilling relationships.
It also depends on what exactly you want, you can want the version of what relationship are like based on what teal is describing in this video, or you can want the traditional relationship where you want marriage and you want children the woman is more focused being a good wife and focused on raising the children while the father is the sole provider and being a good husband and a good father.
I personally choose a woman that loves / respects her parents because my values are more in line with that route because I came from a broken home and told myself I’d build a healthy relationship that will last.
It’s all personal preference, you choose whatever path suits you and your lifestyle.
The balance of light and dark, feminine and masculine within us all is necessary and trying to slowly occur. Balance is the essence of everything. A lot of good points here.
Correction, Dark=masculine, Shadow=feminine, Light=masculine, Wisdom=feminine . The original family= The heavenly Father(Dark) The heavenly Mother(shadow) The heavenly Son(Light) and the heavenly daughter (Wisdom). Positive(Masculinity) negative (femininity). All Males are the incarnation of the Original Male(The Dark/Void). All Females are the incarnation of the original Female(Shadow/chaos) Also known as the first creation of the Void.
Contrast is the essence and balance is what we are trying to achieve between the 2 contrasting and opposite polarities. Without the 2 contrasting sides you have nothing to balance anyway. And people are terrified of contrast because that means something seemingly a total opposite. People get defensive and start compulsively yapping their own perceived stance because they must cling to something for fear of being swept away by the unknown thing that is different.
Maybe. I don’t really know but I do know what I’m talking about but on Saturday nights I pontificate and ramble. 😂
Still idiotic
You and I are on the same wavelength about almost everything so far.
Including the big picture/variables.
I've been too scared to speak up like you
I'm so terrified of being seen. Not so much from childhood trauma.
But from the last four and a half years.
Sure did open my eyes to a lot of things
Teaching single mothers to work and live together, contributing financially as a team and helping with their 'herd' of children.
The worst possible outcome for the children's mental development is to be without their father. You can see this in statistics. It's the socialist fantasy to have this breakdown of family - and it never ever worked anywhere. Even the USSR went back to traditional roles after trying this chaos (what we're going through now) for decades.
Men are learning to be men again and the evolution of our genuine selves is beautiful as a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. ♾️🌀❤️🔥
70-90% of male genome will disappear in the upcoming generations. Self-development is pointless if it doesn't lead to family creation and healthy offspring.
Couldn't have been more resonant to this moment in my life.
This video makes so much sense yet a lot of people really are not self aware of how a relationship should look like and it is so hard for me to understand why. It is common sense, it is logical yet a lot of people really cant grasp this concept.
There's been a lot of emotional disconnect. Usually we learn love from our mothers. Our parents, grandparents, family and community are meant to teach us how to love. Lately we've become very disconnected and nobody is "there" a sense of community is lost with this new generation.
I have feeling it’s about our core wound of rejection and all other things like fear that sets in on molecular level when woman gets pregnant in this scary world for both parents and that energy stays with us and is universal almost especially in modern world!✌️
@Whattimeislove-cd8xn You're bullshitting . Plenty men barely raise their own😂
I’d love for Teal to make a video about ROCD (Relationship OCD). My husband told me he has it a couple of years ago then kind of backtracked, however given some of his behaviours I would say he shows signs. I have felt so unattractive around him as a result. It’s crushing when you know your partner is struggling with OCD that surrounds whether or not you are good enough for them, attractive enough or if they actually love you. I know it’s a real condition but it’s maddening for the partner. Would love some insight on this.
Not many people are totally whole within themselves to be in a relationship. If not it’s too much work.
Thank you for this video. I realize that I've been challenging the 20th century paradigm of relationships without quite knowing it. The man expected me to behave on certain ways amd I would oblige to "keep" him for my security but I cld never keep the status quo. I need comment but freedom at the same time. I can now be more intentional about what I need/want on relationship and no longer be submissive to what the other needs or wants if not compatible.
Not much Hope here.
we need to be very very honest with ourselves
I'm happy alone. I've learned to be comfortable in my single sovereignty and have instilled that in my son after his mother left us when he was 3.
He 20 and now well adjusted for this chaotic world. He understands that another person doesn't complete him.
This is a laser accurate assessment of the current dating scene
we are on our way to becoming enlightened again ❤
Thank you again for looking at the gray and the whole picture. 🙏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
My newest and best relationship is wonderful. He's a bit shy, and for more serious conversations happen over the phone. My poor guy had a messed up abusive relationship. I respect his choices and also one day our plans went away, he apologized and took full responsibility and flinched. When he apologized he was so sweet and didn't want to disappoint me. When he flinched, I didn't have the heart to be mad, I also hugged him, thanked him, and suggested we regroup for a different plan. I live this man, I never want to hurt him, and I compliment him on all the things I love that he does.
please do make an episode on how dating apps have changed the relationship landscape! I'm super curious to hear your thoughts on this topic!
She did
I have a friend in a similar situation to that of 'Parker.' The discontent and anxiety over at that camp is palpable. It's still working, but I always get the sense that if someone sneezes the whole operation will fold.
I wonder if "Parker" doesn't actually exist, but is Teal Swan's idea of what she'd like a man to be.
No way, I found they best partner in my life. He adores, he likes my structure. We are flawed,.. but it is a perfect fit. Still strong after 3 years, it is forever with him.
Good luck but just fyi 3 years is nothing in the long run, your relationship is still a baby. I hope you can make it 20+ years
Teal, Excellent in-depth clarity on why relationships can be so challenging and complicated to comprehend and understand. Excellent review Teal.
I like this, it reflects a lot of the thoughts ive been having lately. It's very clarifying to hear someone else say it
I absolutely 💜 teal. This video just summarised.my thought process over the last few months and I keep thinking how I could help people see this about relationships. I spent 10 yrs learning about relationships academically and personally and my conclusion is in this video. I found the systems was not working in my own relationship and I needed to create something new. My partner is still in the matrix but I am finding that as I change and expose him to different ideas, we've been able to find a new rhythm. But u will go through a lot on imbalance and uncertainty. Often u will feel like break up is the only option. But it is so worth the work to change dynamics and challenge the status quo.
So refreshing to see that leaders can reflect snd update their teachings. That they see and truly know that there is no one way to be human. And no “right” way to be human.
I do not agree with this at all. In short, today's relationships have lost their meaning, where the place of we has been replaced by me.
It's normal that it doesn't work because when we remove the family as the foundation of everything, we turn away from what should be. The Internet is not a safe place, but then again, as humans, we seek connection with others, that's why we write comments.
@selmasvast9911 I come from a large family, all with parents, aunts and uncles who are all married and then if you look at the children, myself, and all of my cousins, none of us are married but we are all much happier with our partnerships and friendships than our parents' are with their marriages (our parents are used to arguing/fighting in the privacy of their homes, and then pretending to be happy couples in pictures and around others, but then complaining or making gossipy, envious comments about others). When me and my cousins all get together with our partners, we are chill, positive, happy for one another - doesn't matter if someone's gay, or has two partners, or has a different partner every week, we actually truly support one another and are there for each other. So it really depends on what "family values" mean, because our parents (gen Xers, boomers) were trying for a model of following the bible and traditional values, but none of us feel accepted or love, and they don't even feel it themselves within their own marriages, they just say they do, but then we kids have to suffer their arguments behind closed doors. Meanwhile, we saw that, decided nope -- and live a more free and accepting lifestyle, but then we're all actually supportive of one another, actually positive, actually trying to grow and be better people - that's real connection and family to me. Also nothing against the bible/traditional values - I think that if people value that, and value the people in their life, than that is wonderful. But for the case of my family, they were disrespecting the people in their life and using the bible to hide behind, that's super shitty.
@@selmasvast9911 Today's relationships have lost their meaning because their meaning didn't meet the needs of the people.
"We" has been replaced by "me" for the exact same reason.
You want those two values back? Either they adapt to meet our needs or they die off.
@@DaAxiomatic Monkey see, monkey do is not a need - it is surrogate BS.
But one thing is for sure, if people who carry contemporary culture don't wisen up fast, we will all pay the ultimate price, and indeed - die off.
That is all that will happen. There will be no new norm based on today's vapid nonsense that has a chance at succeeding.
@@audy2174 true. The Dune movies have made me think that, like the Bene Gesserits planting plans since the beginning of time, maybe our current religion/s have been planted to "brainwash" people. In fact, the Bible only has one agenda, to keep the human race reproducing. And then there's a lot of DON'Ts. Like, how are we going to experience the fullness of human potential if we restrict ourselves from doing maximal things per restrictions from the Bible?
@@audy2174 I'm sorry for your experience, but the Bible has nothing to do with it. But human behavior
Superb! The second part of this video is brilliant. I've noticed these things in myself and my relationships throughout the years. Unconditional love/seeking love and relationships are fundamentally different things. I've grown up being lied to by parents, society and the same Disney movies (also romantic movies and media in general). I learned a lot from Teal about relationships but also a lot of it resonates with me based on my experience and observations. Relationships are fundamentally transactional. Every person's set of needs is different, hence every person's desired relationship is different. Authenticity and honesty with oneself are paramount. Compatibility and reciprocity are crucial. Better alone than in an unfulfilling relationahip that doesn't meet our needs. Thank you, Teal! ❤
Before judging any relationship one should ask two questions:
- Is it working for the couple, no matter if straight, gay, married or just "living together"?
- Does the relationship cause any harm to another sentient being?
If the answer to question1 is Yes and the answer to question2 is No. Great!
I dont have any source, but heard lesbians have a even higher divorce rate.
👏
I agree, but keep in mind that kids are "sentient beings." Too many poly people just handwave away the damage that polygamy does to kids.
Of course if no kids are involved, go ahead.
@@lightworker2956 Never once have I seen a healthy poly group. Everyone has blatant attachment issues, everyone's hiding their pain etc. etc.
As always Teal there you go again blowing the roof of the house this was very intuitive and insightful of you as you always are and for me age 69 without any relationship or real desire for 1 due to my failed choices I apprecilove all that you stated.🎉❤
Please do a video on dating apps and the effect of technology in general on relationships ❤
Many good points here, Thank you Teal.
Personally I think that the main reason to be in a relationship should simply be companionship. Find people you love, that you love to be around.
The more needs and conditions you have to stay in a relationship creates disharmony. It’s no longer about being a yin and a yang - it’s about having your own inner balance and independence. This isn’t a bad thing.
Sure things need to be reimagined but that doesn’t mean undoing everything. Monogamy is definitely ideal. It’s success comes down to the individuals authenticity and good faith, when looking for a person to enter relationship with. It’s always going to come down to the individual, not problems inherent in certain structures. I promise being polyamorous and or swinging isn’t going to be good for your kids or your relationship with your person, or yourself. The idea that two people can truly love each other and go to a swingers party to watch their person be as physically intimate as possible with another person is truly laughable. I think Teal is just too horny and wants to normalize that sort of behavior lol
Mantak Chia's teachings on the Taoist conception of sex and love...beginning in the 1970's...has been a major transformational shift. This knowledge was previously held secret until Mantak's disclosure to the public. Right now still somewhat obscure...but will probably continue to gain momentum in years and decades to come.
22:44 are they thriving? Maybe they are, but sounds like just a NEW Disney tale that didn’t look at the realities/stressors and complex emotions that will arise. So they MAY be thriving. And maybe for a while, but there’s a lot under that rug too.
Spot on Teal!!
I got the message in 2019, that any relationship that works for me, would be Very Unconventional
Do you have children?
Great video. We are in a time of great confusion on what is working and not in relationships
Beautiful video! I love this topic and all the points made. I myself have had this conversation with many of my friends and partners. Some people agree, others look at me crazy. But at the end of the day, I believe its vital for everyone to learn how to customize and create their own life that works for them. Wipe your programming, start with a clean slate, and follow your bliss.
I love you Teal and I normally agree with absolutely everything you say if not sit with a pen and paper to take notes.
And that includes the first half of this video, your analysis of the problem is 100% on the money.
I struggle to imagine the suggestions to be very successful though, for the same reason that war is still unavoidable.
I.e. the spiritual maturity level of most people.
When you genuinely care about universal love, there is always an explanation and solutions.
But that necessitates everybody being on the same page.
I know of one "seemingly successful" Mr Mom type arrangements and many, many others that failed miserably.
I personally think that steering our new modern dating styles in a different way would be better.
For example women shouldn't be waiting until in their 30s to have kids, men should be expecting themselves to make enough money to at least be the primary provider, a man who makes the decisions respects himself and is respected by his partner.
My suggestion is to honour your gender first and make exceptions later.
If you're a man be a provider first and homemaker second, and if you're a woman be a mother first and a professional second.
Everyone can have what they want but if we honour the truth of masculine and feminine roles we all do much better than if we don't.
Thanks for the video though it's really helpful to keep having this conversation with the public in a productive manner.
Keep doing what you do Teal! 💙
Great insightful video Teal accurately portraying the current landscape of relationships.
Had to pull out my popcorn for this😂 🍿🍿
😂
Great job in researching this narrative. Everything will change, we must adapt to the changes. Important to remember is need for connections is vital for human existence.
Everything will stay the same since reality binds us. All these values-liberal attempts will disappear due to demographic reasons, and everything will go back to religious and family-oriented - if enough people survive this craziness.
@edheldude YOUR first sentence spilled the beans.True, we are binded by a reality; also we walk with reality everyday. We come to forks in the road, we must make choices. Sending us off into another reality. Reality is here and there ,to stay .We have to chose our livable reality...
@@larrymorrison1025 But over time these individual attempts will be culled by natural selection, and you'll be left with "a tradition" that works the best. Demographics determine the future.
I really appreciate the way you itemized out each of these alterations in societal norms during this time of transition. I always enjoy hearing your very unique perspective and your ability to precisely explore the realities of what is happening around us. Great video!
Transition. Trans mutation.
Relationships aren't about societal norms - they're about survival of the fittest over a long period of time. The traditions we have are social technologies that solved mating problems so successfully we created these high cultures. There is no high culture without focus on family and spirituality. This me me me stuff doesn't work, and all of these relationship deconstructions have been tried already. They didn't survive.
Uuuuhhhh... You have update us with much needed awareness for this time. Thank you so much Teal for your video, information, help, and education. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I love youuuuuuuu. Btw, I always brag you to my friend as a legit source for spiritual and awareness content
I've been waiting the whole day for a new video 😂❤
A life might help.
@@roses6564 oh, you're suggesting me to kill myself? Thank you.
Most important relationship video of this decade
I love you. ❤ So happy you made this video as I've been trying to understand what is the right romantic relationships configuration for me. And kept asking for a video about that. 🙏 And this video makes me realize I cannot just listen to coaches or people's advice, but truly tap into what is my deepest truths and those might still be subconscious to me. Thank you for the kick in the ass to be more sovereign and creating my life as is authentic to my individuality. You're the best. 🔥❤
Love this! The example is spot on! ❤ we need diverse voices and people in our lives! Great job!
I've been given that example and I absolutely hate that🤷. I do not want to get super independent at a very young age because for what? I love my parents and they are very important for me and it is also important to have a repaired relationship with them. Trying to get super independent as fast as possible devastated my whole nervous system 🤯.
@@arts_alchemyexpression444 So act accordingly. Do what works for you, discard what doesn't.
In other words, customise.
Wow! I really resonated with a lot of the example you gave! Makes me feel a great sense of comfort.
You described my beliefs on relationships to a T, it was almost scary!
So excited for the shifting paradigms
People often negatively judge and shame people for desiring what they were taught to believe is normal and what to expect.
Such norms are vague lines at best, and to be treated as such.
We learned what actually worked for centuries, and now people try to reinvent the wheel with terrible results.
thanks for articulating so well what I have been thinking and observing lately about the changing nature of relationships that society is in now...
It all boils down to what you value… you can not serve two masters….
You shouldn't serve any masters, but rather stay true to yourself.
@@SerenaEMorganEveryone serves a master. The only question is, do you pick your master or does it pick you?
@@NJGuy1973 "My one dream, my only master."
Thats exactly how I feel. Id rather be alone if he is not gonna work, if hes not going to help me. Im doing everything. Studying, working, taking care of the kids, cleaning the house. I get tired. Im trying to communicate more and I had to learn to put my love to the side and become transactional.
The only relationship model I want is to find a man that will love me back and being with him outside civilization living off the land because at this point, I dont care for the sick society anymore.
precisely, me also🤘🏻
good luck 🍀🙏🏻
@@elena-jp6ge Thanks! To you too. 🥰🍀🌞
@@jpeters868 Exactly. 90's and early 00' sound perfect. 🌞🍀
It is very hard to meet our needs outside of civilization . If you can find a man to love you who has a similar dream you can find a new way within the constraints of nature and economics.
I love you Seal. I’ve only been listening to you for the last 15 yrs . Almost constantly. What a beautiful woman and a beautiful mind.
this is a topic i needed so much recently
To finding joy in what works, respects & supports ♥️.
Let's be clear. Most harems existed in a time and geographical area, where it was not consentual. They were brothel sex slaves, bought and sold, often to men of high economic social status. I wouldn't call that a style of relationship.
I’m 43 and single with no kids or really friends. I stay to myself most times. At first it made me feel lonely and I looked at everyone else’s relationships with each other then once I started really paying to their interactions I realize most people only tolerate each other… they create this imagine if the person in their head and interact with that imagine while not really seeing the real person in front of them… and the continuously do and say things that hurt each other jit because they either justify or deny their behavior …but because they are quick to say I love you , suddenly everything is magically okay… love has became a description instead of a verb. I know that even myself that I isolate from others isn’t healthy and I’m working on that but atleast I can say it’s my honest reality that I’m not trying to dismiss… all these good people waking around harming everything and everyone
Every relationship is unique is my takeaway and it takes communication and understanding of values to explore happiness together and what that looks like for you.
I’ve gotten into the habit lately of comparing what my family life looks like to others posting on social media and it can make you feel not enough/sad, but it’s so flawed and I have to redirect myself to what is going well in my own life and family and gratitude
People overanalyze. It leaves them with empty hands and overflowing heads.
People need to stop this minmaxing. It is a game concept, not a viable way to experience life.
No relationship is unique. People are 99% the same and it only seems complex because you're focusing on "your happiness" instead of having the frame of family creation. People have worked together since the dawn of time but now everyone speaks themselves out of their main biological function, reproduction.
@@edheldude I don’t think so. Everyone has different levels of trauma and experiences and personalities. Not everyone wants the same thing and it’s a beautiful thing that people have a choice today. Ancestral trauma is also more embedded with the later generations.
So fascinating and intelligently shared. Thank you!
Could you do an episode on the low birth rate / low fertility rate trend? I myself am childfree and so are most people I know. I’m curious about Teal’s perspective on this trend that is becoming more and more mainstream and prevalent
It’s called being poor and having better birth control than in the past
My thoughts (also childfree)…I am one of the very few women in my line who has had the opportunity to experience a life that I choose, that is about freedom to follow my intuition and desires and not about raising children or devoting my life to another (a child). I’m honored to be in this position, to be able to choose and shape my life in a way many have not been able to. Looking at this from the perspective of the universe-it Is experience! And a rare form of experience…that is one of my contributions to the universal knowledge
You've adopted the values system that leads to that. You were instructed to remove yourself, and you believed it. It's like getting a serious radiation poisoning. You think you're ok but your body is unable to reproduce, i.e. fulfill it's main biological function.
Everyne has to honestly look at themselves and do the work. Everyone has traits of both genders but when integrated they become whole.
Each of them are THRIVING while sharing their living space and privacy with 8 other people?? Give me a break.
The cost of living is making that inevitable but then the hidden hand of economics has a lot to do with this.
@@dr.strangelove5708 They want us like this. But at least let' not pretend it's all right and even IDEAL!
That's how we evolved as a species, it's easy to find out why it's worth a try for some
@@jeez297 For some, sure. But she didn't talk about living in a community with space and nature, she talked about a flat, Friends'style.
Try ask her to swap her villas with that and a bunch of kids ...
@@jeez297 We evolved to share our living spaces and the care of children with people of our own tribes, whom we've known all our lives, not some random strangers that we have to vet like in a job interview.
Your vids are gold dust! So much packed in 1!
So beautiful and elegant❤
Video on dating apps and social media would be 👌🏻👌🏻 love your content and youre such a great intelligent communicator. Thankyou!!
There seems to be a new phenomenon of young adults choosing to become estranged from their parents. I would love to hear more about that.
Well, part of it is that young people have it way tougher than their parents did, and parents aren't acknowledging that, leading to resentment.
James Lindsey has a lot to say about this- (though I disagree with him on lots). Part of it is natural. Part of it is a purposeful attempt to radicalize the youth-the first step is to turn them against older generations, separating them from the people who care about and protect them 💜 so they can then be groomed as tools
Thank you for this thought provoking video. One significant element contributing to the breakdown of traditional relationships that wasn't mentioned is that modern women have achieved great equality in the sense of rights and social standing, but many still reject the idea of equal responsibilities. A minor example would be the expectation in 2024 for a man to still pay for everything, which I've unfortunately discovered is shockingly common. Nothing justifies such an attitude, it is simply greed and a sense of entitlement. The modern dating landscape looks to me like a bunch of selfish people just looking out for themselves, it is sad.
Brilliant video Teal! Thank you very much for these insights ❤
Relationships are dead. Everyone is too busy. Too much work. Not enough caring & kindness.
They aren’t dead…they don’t have to be.
@@leannaprather2258 They are. As soon as women said they don't care about men and what they want, they transformed themselves into something that doesn't fit together with healthy masculinity. That's why there's so many single mothers too.