Shame and Not Feeling Good Enough: 3 Ways To Stop Both

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  • Опубліковано 24 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 54

  • @zakiamwoma4647
    @zakiamwoma4647 4 місяці тому

    Yes. Yes. Having grown up being gaslit,condemned and rejected. Shame and self doubt took over

  • @nikkimckay860
    @nikkimckay860 2 роки тому +10

    I don't like getting caught up in my emotions and yes I often ask myself what's wrong with me I have been very judgemental towards myself

  • @AlexandraMorneau
    @AlexandraMorneau 9 місяців тому

    Sending love to those who were raised on shame and are learning and reversing this mindset ❤

  • @debipotter9136
    @debipotter9136 2 роки тому +11

    This was so helpful and came at a great time. Being raised by a fragile narcissistic mom really has messed with my head. I was the invisible child...so not feeling good enough is a daily thing. Thank you for this video.

  • @clairebears2013
    @clairebears2013 2 роки тому +4

    Being comfortable with the uncomfortable

  • @adamdenard7573
    @adamdenard7573 2 роки тому +5

    Thanks Julia...this was a timely reminder..it's amazing how after everything I've learnt..shame fires up so easily and automatically.. radical acceptance!!

  • @raiderlove5923
    @raiderlove5923 2 роки тому +7

    I'm someone who tends to follow my emotions or let them run my life, Julia. I am feeling this is the perfect talk/video for me to listen to. You are a great help.

  • @tanishapetertv2298
    @tanishapetertv2298 2 роки тому +6

    Thank you for helping us to break down these barrier that hold us back from experiencing life freely

  • @susanwheeler-hall
    @susanwheeler-hall 2 роки тому +12

    Well said Julia, this certainly is the experience I know from growing up with a physical disability. When one is constantly asked, ‘what’s wrong with you?’ it takes real intention to reframe such experiences and not believe one is wrong for simply being in the world. Learning to celebrate differences does take intention and helps to deflect unwanted feelings of shame. Acceptance is paramount to well-being. You rock!

  • @nikkimckay860
    @nikkimckay860 2 роки тому +5

    Julia Kristina. Very interesting and helpful video I have a lot of shame and often feeling like I'm not good enough with Meany things I do ❤️

  • @carolynpepper
    @carolynpepper 2 роки тому +5

    I shared your video with my son and daughter in law. Thank you for all that you do ❤

  • @rongike
    @rongike 2 роки тому +5

    this is such a good video, these things should be mandatory for parents to learn to teach their children before they have children 👍

    • @lesliengo8347
      @lesliengo8347 2 роки тому +3

      100% agree. I feel this would also be valuable in schools too

  • @johnykryll
    @johnykryll 2 роки тому +4

    Thanks for this video, everything you do here helps so much. I wish you would do some TED talks, I think they would be brilliant

  • @Mary-1111
    @Mary-1111 2 роки тому +6

    I am struggling these last two days. I had a disagreement withy significant other. Now I just feel meh.

  • @cfjohnson7369
    @cfjohnson7369 Рік тому

    I saw this 4 months ago, came back to see it again!

  • @richardparks9347
    @richardparks9347 2 роки тому +3

    Needed this video, it could not have come at a better time for me! I have been, for the past few years, really working on the relationship I have with myself and working hard to establish a strong sense of self. In many ways I have done some good and am incredibly proud of the work I’ve done. But lately one thing I have noticed is that in my journey if a feeling or emotion comes up that I am thinking I should be past I try to fight it and treat it as though me feeling this way is going back to that part of life where I was on rocky road with my mental health. I’ve been really trying to get more secure with my insecurities and the full range of human emotion a bit better. This video highlighted the need for that journey with me and was intensely emotional but in a good way, I felt some emotions come up and I allowed myself to feel them and be ok with them! Thank you Julia, I am so loving all of your work!

  • @lesliengo8347
    @lesliengo8347 2 роки тому +6

    I wonder why emotional intelligence is not taught in schools. It may be difficult to talk about, but there are things that are taught in school that are uncomfortable but important
    For me, the first step is to let myself feel my emotion and catch judgements.

  • @kin2him
    @kin2him 2 роки тому +2

    Golda-shifter
    Julia…..I soooo needed this today! I will post more on FB. THANK YOU for addressing this topic. Would sure love a master class with more on this!!! 👍🏻👍🏻

  • @blackfang441
    @blackfang441 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you for being you.

  • @flyingrhinofilms
    @flyingrhinofilms 2 роки тому +5

    I struggle with this a lot, just listening to this made me upset...Not in a bad way, just that you hit the nail on the head, as you do with most of your videos. Working through it I suppose.....thank you 🙏

  • @victoria2226
    @victoria2226 2 роки тому +2

    Thanks Julia. I live tapping into your vids. Highly recommend CoDa to anyone who struggles with this stuff. A great program for those with trauma/codependency. 🙏✨♥️

  • @thomas4857
    @thomas4857 2 роки тому +1

    Thank you maam

  • @locust334
    @locust334 Рік тому

    Julia, you are incredible. I don't have the words to express how valuable these videos are to me. I was a bit lost in some overwhelming emotions and I now have somewhere at least to start. Like you said one foot in front of the other.

  • @thenebraskan6977
    @thenebraskan6977 2 роки тому +1

    Hi Julia, thanks for the awesome video. I watched it twice in a row! It really hit home with me. Shame on you is a term I heard often as a kid growing ⬆️ up. Two other ones I heard were real men don’t cry and what will the neighbors think? I have been a big fan of yours for the last three years or so and as soon as I tap comment added I am signing up for The Shift Society!

  • @daniellejones6339
    @daniellejones6339 Рік тому

    Your videos are so great. I have been watching you for years and this one in particular resonates with me. Thank you for being there To help any time of day.❤️ I watched the social Isolation one... I haven't had friends in About nine years. I'm gonna try to work on that.

  • @harleyvincent7917
    @harleyvincent7917 2 роки тому +1

    Julia, are you able to cover something on Abusive Behaviour.. what may cause it and how to overcome it (both as an abuser and as a victim) please?

  • @lloydrprather4765
    @lloydrprather4765 Рік тому

    Thank you all your share of this compassion. ❤

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Рік тому

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @Dina-ou1ft
    @Dina-ou1ft 2 роки тому

    1. Allow yourself to feel a full range of emotion
    2. Be open-hearted and acceptance of your feelings. Good or bad, this is what we are feeling
    3. Learn how to soothe and settle unpleasant emotion
    Really appreciate your work, Julia

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Рік тому

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @denisewhitlock357
    @denisewhitlock357 2 роки тому

    Soothing and settling upsetting emotions is definitely something I need to work on. Thanks for this video❤

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Рік тому

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @michaelgilbert2717
    @michaelgilbert2717 2 роки тому +1

    Hi Julia I'm Michael I learn a lot from you thanks

  • @Skilledddgirliee643
    @Skilledddgirliee643 9 місяців тому

    Hii Julia!
    I'm 16 from India. I've been through sexual abuse many times and have tons of trauma. Can you please make a series on healing the childhood sexual abuse and healing cause I can't afford therapy rn and your vedios have helped me alot. I'm literally struggling alot, can't even spend a normal day without feeling gross

  • @ray60723
    @ray60723 2 роки тому

    Very helpful, thank you so much!

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Рік тому +1

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @francesbeth2077
    @francesbeth2077 2 роки тому +1

    Great topics discussed in your video. I never knew what shame was until now. i wonder why I have it. Or does everyone have it but know how to control it?

  • @SOGSouljah
    @SOGSouljah 2 роки тому +5

    Julia is so beautiful!!

  • @jessicashaw7143
    @jessicashaw7143 2 роки тому +3

    I don't understand how emotions are not part of you? The thoughts and pain running through me seem to be so real I don't see how you separate from them. The worst part it's like a lifetime of the same event happens the you feel your being ripped in half and no one cares.
    Can any try to help me understand?

  • @blackfang441
    @blackfang441 2 роки тому +1

    I am morbidly obese and I feel ashamed of myself for going thru depression and these human experiences. This video was very helpful, it will take a long time before I am comfortable with these emotions, but should I accept them? Will accepting them be a positive reinforcement that will allow me to change and be healthy? The opposite can also be said that when I am feeling them it leads to further destructive eating behaviors.

  • @stevecatanio8532
    @stevecatanio8532 2 роки тому +1

    But these videos are invaluable

  • @brendarees3600
    @brendarees3600 2 роки тому +1

    Can you join the shift society from the UK. If so how? Thank you great videos

  • @martymaker
    @martymaker Рік тому +1

    Why black and white? It feels strange...

  • @sandbar3000
    @sandbar3000 2 роки тому +2

    8:16 can't really allow it...not all the way if at work talking to ppl ...kinda I guess "allow the feeling" of being ______ ______
    _______
    What? Incompetent
    Slow learner?
    Quiter.. wanting to quit!
    Then just walking through that shitty feeling.
    I don't want to allow the feeling of "I think I should quit my job. It's hard" to go through my mind what I'm working a case or talking to someone. I'd rather hsve that after work. Customers don't need that vibe.

  • @kikininja613
    @kikininja613 2 роки тому

    What about when you feel shame within a relationship? As in someone else is blaming you, and you feel guilty and shamed because of that.

    • @anita_benz90
      @anita_benz90 Рік тому

      Thanks..Glad you Love My Content, Write ✍️ Me Up 💬 Above 🔝 I'll Shear You Some beneficial Analysis'''update & enlightenment....

  • @sandbar3000
    @sandbar3000 2 роки тому +1

    How about feeling "I can't do this job. I didn't sign up for this! Cuz in training they didn't tell you everything you need to do. Uh and you just totally put yourself down. I mean training may teach 1/8th of what is needed or 1/10th..right after training!
    And a person (me) maybe able to do 1/2 of it all and learn that much after 4 months on the job.
    Well doing /understandingb50% of the position & responsibility....50% is way more than knowing 1/10th right after training! Right.
    I'm here now. 1 month after training. I'm saying "I can't do this stuff" and I don't even give myself a chance! Huh? What? I mean probation period - some jobs 6 months. Some job it's 12 months. This position? 18 months.

  • @infinity-mn4eo
    @infinity-mn4eo 2 роки тому +1

    Hi 🥰

  • @stevecatanio8532
    @stevecatanio8532 2 роки тому +1

    But also smart. Your husband should be lucky

  • @songsforsale427
    @songsforsale427 2 роки тому +1

    I honestly couldn't connect with this one it was just too much "buy my product and services"

  • @stevecatanio8532
    @stevecatanio8532 2 роки тому +1

    I think you're very attractive