I discovered the book this year (2024) and it instantly changed my life. I’m 55 years old and it was as if the book was written about me. I could post an essay, but suffice to say one story: a job opening came up just after I finished it I would not have had the courage to take. I was “helpless” And” trapped” in a job in which I felt taken advantage of. There was a lot of luck in the timing but I increased my salary 35% and have a much better job. That’s only the surface, the changes within myself are profound. I feel like a man. If only I found this book when it first came out, I might have the world at my feet.
@@5Fractures Thank you. And yes, I’ve personally battled with boundaries for years. Dr. Robert Glover will be with us for Front Row Dads Live in Austin if you want to come hang in person. FrontRowDads.com/live
Can we please stop using the word Nice to actually describe something bad. I know that he's pointing out that this version of nice isn't actually nice, but still I don't like the sound of it because it reenforces the idea that being nice is bad. While I respect Glover, have read the book many times and have even highlighted sections, and have also heard him interviewed so many times I could probably do the interview for him, a problem I have is the same with so many other authors, coaches, therapists or whatever title. It seems most of them are describing women that I've never met or maybe they've just never met the women that I've known. I could give countless examples but let me mention this one. In talking about boundaries and "standing up to her", he's often told the story of crossing the shoelace on the ground and how she'll respect you if you enforce boundaries and that women actually want you to enforce them and stand up to her. That's not my experience. Women I've known, if presented with a boundary, much like the shoelace, will boldly step over it, get right in your face and say "now what". I know that most coaches will say that women will test you and your boundaries, but to simply say test implies that you might be able to pass. With most women I've known, it's not a matter of seeing IF you pass, it's to see how long it takes before you fail. So for something as simple as the string on the ground example, a woman will boldly step over it and the "now what" ultimately has to end with you ending the relationship, no matter how minor the issue was. In the book, he gives the example of Jake and Tisha where, when they go out, Tisha usually has too much to drink and winds up dancing and flirting with other men. Jake calls her on it and at first she gets upset but Jake holds fast and is telling her that if she wants to stay married to him, she has to stop that behavior. She eventually relents. I'd love to know where that type of woman is because I'd see that scene ending with Tisha bringing another man into their bed and her intentionally letting Jake find them, just to let him know that he can't tell her what to do. Of course to something like that, Glover or any other author would tell you that you shouldn't be with that sort of woman and tell you to leave her, but so many women are incredibly strong willed to the point that you'd just wind up with another one just like her. Anyway, again, respect him but like with every other coach out there, I have no idea what women they're talking about because it's not the human ones from the planet Earth.
I discovered the book this year (2024) and it instantly changed my life. I’m 55 years old and it was as if the book was written about me. I could post an essay, but suffice to say one story: a job opening came up just after I finished it I would not have had the courage to take. I was “helpless” And” trapped” in a job in which I felt taken advantage of. There was a lot of luck in the timing but I increased my salary 35% and have a much better job. That’s only the surface, the changes within myself are profound. I feel like a man. If only I found this book when it first came out, I might have the world at my feet.
@@chetp8423 appreciate you sharing your experience
That nervous system is no joke. That’s probably a good time to take notes on what boundaries we want to commit ourselves with.
@@ScotHarris-c2z True.
I just finished reading a book on boundaries. I didn't realize that there were so many different ones.
Great stuff men. Boundaries are always a challenge.
@@5Fractures Thank you. And yes, I’ve personally battled with boundaries for years. Dr. Robert Glover will be with us for Front Row Dads Live in Austin if you want to come hang in person. FrontRowDads.com/live
1:00:48
Ground
Breathe
Open
Get Curious
@@AlxndrHQ that’s it!
Great video. Keep up the good work 👏 🙌 👍
@@dja-juicepowersourceproduc2887 Thanks so much.
Can we please stop using the word Nice to actually describe something bad. I know that he's pointing out that this version of nice isn't actually nice, but still I don't like the sound of it because it reenforces the idea that being nice is bad.
While I respect Glover, have read the book many times and have even highlighted sections, and have also heard him interviewed so many times I could probably do the interview for him, a problem I have is the same with so many other authors, coaches, therapists or whatever title. It seems most of them are describing women that I've never met or maybe they've just never met the women that I've known. I could give countless examples but let me mention this one.
In talking about boundaries and "standing up to her", he's often told the story of crossing the shoelace on the ground and how she'll respect you if you enforce boundaries and that women actually want you to enforce them and stand up to her. That's not my experience. Women I've known, if presented with a boundary, much like the shoelace, will boldly step over it, get right in your face and say "now what". I know that most coaches will say that women will test you and your boundaries, but to simply say test implies that you might be able to pass. With most women I've known, it's not a matter of seeing IF you pass, it's to see how long it takes before you fail. So for something as simple as the string on the ground example, a woman will boldly step over it and the "now what" ultimately has to end with you ending the relationship, no matter how minor the issue was.
In the book, he gives the example of Jake and Tisha where, when they go out, Tisha usually has too much to drink and winds up dancing and flirting with other men. Jake calls her on it and at first she gets upset but Jake holds fast and is telling her that if she wants to stay married to him, she has to stop that behavior. She eventually relents. I'd love to know where that type of woman is because I'd see that scene ending with Tisha bringing another man into their bed and her intentionally letting Jake find them, just to let him know that he can't tell her what to do.
Of course to something like that, Glover or any other author would tell you that you shouldn't be with that sort of woman and tell you to leave her, but so many women are incredibly strong willed to the point that you'd just wind up with another one just like her.
Anyway, again, respect him but like with every other coach out there, I have no idea what women they're talking about because it's not the human ones from the planet Earth.