Paternity Leave Ends! And I Find Myself...
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- Опубліковано 27 сер 2024
- ...in an airport.
In which John discusses his paternity leave, travel, the digging of holes, cursing during Liverpool matches, the strange memories of children, and Germans.
THANK YOU TO THE GUEST HOSTS:
Hannah Hart: / myharto
Grace Helbig: / dailygrace
WheezyWaiter: / wheezywaiter
Rosianna: / missxrojas
MagicTurtle643: / magicturtle643
NerdyAndQuirky: / nerdyandquirky
I'm a German and if I'm at a beach I'll start digging. I don't know why. It's a urge. I have to.
I'm half German so it's really a toss for me. My German side wants to grab a shovel but my British side wants to a grab a kettle of tea.
codextraordinary a kettle of tea,now thats german efficiency right there.
codextraordinary
Well you have two hands don't you? One is for digging the other is for holding your cup of tea.
Kind of like whenever I am outside of Canada's borders I suddenly HAVE to use the word "eh" about 5 times as much as normal? I don't know why I do it, I just do and I'm not doing it on purpose.
I find myself in that exact same position, everytime I visit a beach. Maybe its because of an innate urge to engineer...
Paternity leave ended and John Green once again found himself...in an airport. Paternity Leave Ends! And I Find Myself...
I'm almost certain he didn't but I like to imagine Henry said "Germans" in that tone.
i laughed SO HARD at the german thing
Another stereotype: A friend's kid doesn't like Asian people. This is because when he lived in China as a very young child, the only thing he could understand is when they were laughing. Because he could understand it, they must be using English, which to him meant that the only time they made sure he could understanding was when they were laughing (in English), and why would they bother to laugh in his language, unless they were laughing at him?
Child logic is a wonderful thing.
I find the idea that stories about other people's kids are boring to be strange. I love stories about other people's kids. Then again, I like hearing about people's dreams too, and people tend to say that's meant to be boring.
Me too! Dreams can be so wild
I find it a bit strange that people think dreams are inherently boring. Some of them can be boring, but on the whole they are very interesting and there are many other things that can be called boring, but no one says they are boring.
same
Despite my last name, I am not German. However, my husband is. Where does this put me on the hole digging front? Should I support my husband in his hole digging endeavors? Should I dig a shallow ditch, or maybe provide spades? These are questions that come up in an interracial marriage.
You should dig a set of stairs to facilitate a deeper hole. Now I think about it, it's basically Minecraft in real life; so if he's digging holes, you should be punching trees!
Depends on your nationality as to your own twist on the hole digging
As a Dutch person I find this the best vlogbrother story so far
This is one of my all-time favorite vlogbrothers videos. It's the one I show people who don't know anything about vlogbrothers. When John looks dead at the camera and says "Germans"... I crack up every time.
I feel kind of guilty as I am German and digged holes at the beach in the Netherlands when I was around 7 years old. I didn't know about this stereotype before but when I think of it I notice that we sometimes might dig quite big holes at beaches... oooops :D
Same of there was a beach i wanted to make 1. A big hole and 2. A sandcastle and it was really good to use the sand of the hole for sand castle... also if there is water in the hole you can stick your feet into it and wash them before going home
i live in the netherlands and the story about the hole dinging germans is very true, the problem is not that they do it, they can do whatever entertains them, the problem is that they dig to deep so the instable holes colapse and they simply "drown" and die because they get trapped in the sand and you can imagine it is not fun to find a corpse on your sunny day on the beach. also in the netherlands it is common and almost oblygatory for kids of the age of 4 to get swimming classes , so when they are 6 they can swim perfectly fine and they will less likely drown because a matority of the netherlands has water everywhere. but in germany this is not common because the ground is higher so they wont be in danger that fast , so when the not-being-able-to-swim-properly-germans come to the beach and make holes near the sea they will drown in them when the tides change. that is the problem dutch people have with german-tourists C: hope this clears this up
yes of course not aallll germans do it, it would be a ballefeild. no just almost all the people who do this are germans , because the rest of the tourists go to sities as amsterdam C:
Bbbut why? Why are they digging holes? I hoped it's just some kind of an american slang thing for ruining the beach. I know some people are walking with metal detectors to find some lost rings and stuff. But actually digging holes?
PS. I saw lot's of young germans in Spain but they usually weren't equipped with anything bigger than glowsticks
i actualy dont know why they do it, like they dig it and then they sit in it for the day, picnick or whatever, and then the next day they come back to the hole and sit in it again, but when its taken they demand that the people leave. so like they think that they make a spot? or they like it? i asked around but nobody realy knows
ronnepony this is insane! It's like a plot for an Adventure Time episode %)
aha so thats why, thank you!
The tippy tippy bottom
Emily L the opposite of the tippy tippy top
There are worse stereotypes to have about Germans
Why were the Germans digging huge holes in beaches, may I ask?
You know, that's quite an interesting story involving 17th century law, the British Crown, Sir Isaac Newton, and two people fighting over a stuffed turkey. Needless to say it is a really, really long story, so I can't be bothered writing it down now.
Oh I forgot, It also involved involves Tulips.
***** It wasn't a joke, it is history.
Daan Dekker Even so, you wrote it in a humorous manner, so I agree! Well done!
***** Its deep in our instinct. Every second, the english could come and land on the beach. We like to be prepared.
***** Gotta build some defenses. Can't be at a beach without a bunker.
Does anybody else think John looks really good in this video? Like his hair is working with him for once, and his skin is all glowy. Dang, even the the 5 O'clock is working for him. This was a really good time for him it seems.
I think I can say without hyperbole that this is one of the greatest things on the internet.
Nothing can be more fun than the regular you, John!
I want John to ask Henry about the germans digging holes again and watch Henry not remember this at all. I forgot the term and scientific things behind it but it happens to us once we hit five we dont remember anything before five years old.
Sooo proud of our german bunker builders all around the world!
OMG it's true... I'm German and last year during our family holiday I dug several holes into the beach. I don't know why, I never thought about it, I just did it...
German here, haven't digging any holes in beaches since I was 5 years old
I see I started watching vlogbrothers about 5 years late, or there would actually have been a chance that I'd meet you. Greetings from the Netherlands (thank you SO much for NOT calling it Holland!)
Yep, three is about when our oldest daughter started surprising us with all the stuff she remembered. Random things that we might forget or take for granted. She's 4 1/2 now and still doing it. I expect our 2 1/2 year old to start doing that any day now (she already surprises us with a pretty decent sense of humor -- for a 2 y.o. that is).
They are called Strand Burgen, sand walls with a mound "BURG" in the middle you put a beach chair and possibly a tent or other temporary dwelling. They were more common back in the 30's and earlier. We have black and white pre WW2 pic's of my great grandparents on a dutch beach making one. It's an old and dying German tradition.
i didn't know that i'm supposed to dig holes, but i'm going to start right away
This is indeed a very prominent stereotype in the Netherlands. I'm not quiet sure how accurate it is. But I wouldn't say there is any bad blood between the Dutch and the German. Maybe a few years ago because of football, but as far as I know we all get along. It may differ from region to region, but here in Amsterdam the Germans are probably our most popular neighbor. Unlike the French they speak English, and unlike the English they aren't obnoxious. (No offence to the UK, but you guys send the worst tourist to Amsterdam)
WOO rubbish tourists prize! Sorry about them, but it's kinda of our thing. And it's not just to Amsterdam, we send them all of Europe, it's pretty embarrassing but what can you do?
Max White The prize for rubbish tourists usually goes to the Australians. That is, unless you really need to get drunk and speak a lot of English. Then find the nearest Australians. They will help.
They always seemed friendly drunk to me. I have a lot of time for friendly drunk.
Lily Monster Us Aussie's aren't that bad. The crazy ones maybe but not all.
Remembering my holiday experiences as a kid (I'm German) I think the hole digging is not just a stereotype, I did that a lot, my dad and my brother did that a lot, if there's sand, we dig.
John, Hank, everything you guys do makes me happy, makes me smile and makes me believe that the world ia still wonderful in some sort of way. You trigger my curiousity and help me endure through hardships using laughter and inspiration. I want you guys to know that you make me want to be a better son, friend and person. Thank you for being amazing.
Ya!!!! He was in Michigan!!!! Love him forever now!!!!
I just want to say, I am German and have spend two summers on beaches in the Netherlands and I did not dig one hole! Stereotype broken, yes! :D
Are you the exception, not the rule though my friend?
So, now I now know that I should never ever ever EVER take a drink from any beverage of any sort, because I did this before you made the "airport or monastery" remark, and I nearly died. I had the option of spitting out my water, or choking on it, and I have kids and a dog so I didn't want to clean up another liquid of hopefully not gross nature, so I choked on my water. It was painful, but a lesson well learned.
I'm German and I've never been to Denmark but I can tell you something. We really like to build sand castles and we also just generally like to do something with the beach while we're on the beach. And I did some research and found out that some of the hole diggers like to sit in them, which kinda makes sense because in a hole you're safe from too much sun and also cooled by the often wet sand down there.
this was posted on my birthday. BEST GIFT EVER. I've missed you, John.
One does not simply snort Heroin.
IMO, a monastery in an airport is an intriguing idea.
Honestly, the videos in which you talk about your children and parenting are some of my favorites. My wife is due to give birth to our first in live 5 weeks and I'm freaking out a bit and these videos are great.
Only you, John, make stories about your children NOT boring. I once had an English teacher who, unfortunately, rarely did much teaching, but she would constantly tell us about her newborn baby. Especially poop stories. Ooooh the poop stories. Thanks Ms. T... I really needed the comparison of poop to chocolate frozen yogurt.
And this is why we love you John- because you can tell baby stories that are interesting, adorable, and lack any poop-food comparisons.
Your kid has to be the best. I almost woke my parents up laughing do hard about hole-digging Germans.
You laugh about the Germans-Digging-Holes thing, but you should check out Scandinavia and the World. It's a webcomic that neatly encapsulates all the weird little european eccentricities when it comes to how each country thinks of the ones nextdoor.
Welcome back! Interesting about your son. FYI - I have very clear memories about conversations and situations from my toddler years. I'm 45! Very clear. My mom told me I was NOT to talk to the new neighbors because they weren't the same as us. I remember realizing WHY they weren't the same. First stereotype. 2yrs old. You are right to worry!
Stories about your kids are absolutely fantastic, not boring.
Saw an ad for "Head + Shoulders for Men" on this video - I've been using head and shoulders all this time shit have I been losing my masculinity without noticing
BUT ITS TRUE THEY DO DIG HOLES IN OUR DAMN BEACHES!!!
Sorry😂
This reminds me of a story about my little sister. When she was 2 we were watching Pirates of the Carribean and she was present but not really paying attention, or so we thought. About a week later, my mom caught her sitting on the kitchen counter eating brown sugar out of the bag. When my mom started to scold her, she put her hands up and yelled "Parle!" It's funny what they pick up on at such a young age.
Welcome back! You were missed! Congrats on your newest bundle of joy!
It might be genetic. I dig big holes on the beach, and I'm 1/4 German.
There is a German exchange student at my school, and my sister has observed him carrying sandwiches in his pockets. Not even in a baggie, just stuck into his pocket. He then pulls it out and takes a bite every so often. Is this another interesting German quirk, or is he just weird? I'm very curious.
Lily Wood I know that it's a bit late, but he definitely is just weird.
I'm Dutch and I find all these comments hilarious. I applaud you all. Also would like to point out that just because we're a bit annoyed about a few untimely dug holes in our beaches, we don't hate our German neighbors.
I am so glad your back! However I also really enjoyed while you were gone. After watching Grace's video on your channel I discovered so many amazing UA-camrs! So thanks for that!
This made me smile so much!!! So glad you are back John!
They dig holes to protect beach chairs+themselves against water+wind. In Germany people can rent beach chairs for the duration of their holiday. S(tr)andburgen allow Germans to talk to neighbours, while having their own private place. In the Netherlands, it's not usual to rent beach chairs for more than 1 day, therefore it's not a Dutch tradition: people would have to dig a new hole every day. (got this from a book, have no idea if it's the correct explanation)
Something about imaging cute little Henry innocently digging at the beach with Daddy and casually conversing about hole-digging Germans is just so damn funny and adorable to picture in my mind.
Henry is adorable. I played this to my mom and she smiled and laughed.
I'm just... can't believe you're back!!. Welcome back, glad you're here.
Welcome back John!! Hope you had a wonderful month with your family
The tippy tippy bottom, the opposite of the tippy tippy top AWWHWHWW that is actually the most adorable thing!
they do dig holes in our beaches! Growing up next to the Dutch beach I saw it all the time. And when they leave and you don't pay attention where you are going you fall in them. A lot.
It's so nice to see and hear you again, we missed you!
I missed John. What a simple yet satisfactory video.
John! I just finished reading The Fault in Our Stars and I'm sure you've heard it a million times but it's AMAZING!!! I'm reading for the third time in the last two days. I can't wait to get my hands on the other novels you've written!!!
I like how you count driving home in 1 day a road trip where you had time for lunch and play, and my family didn't even call 20 hours driving and a 5 hour ferry over 2 days a road trip.
As a German living like 3 km from the dutch border, I enjoyed this video quite a lot. I really can relate.
When I was a kid and we were on holiday in the Netherlands we always dug holes to have enough sand for our sandcastle. In the end the hole was all the way around the sandcastle to protect it from the water but yeah.
I'm surprised the Dutch see us that way :D
I never thought I would cry over an author.
Just returned to the internet after two weeks of no wifi due to moving house, and I find Nerdfighters making John Green quotes into quotes about holes. I love you guys
I just about started jumping around because I was so stoked that that John is back. Yay!
That is adorable indeed. I know my daughter said a lot of weird things she remembers from being little, and continues to do this. Don't worry too much.... they forget more and more as they get older. :)
We dig holes, because it's fun! I always loved digging two holes and connecting them under the ground, creating a bridge that could carry a fully grown ..child..
Oh, now I really want to go to the beach!
I think stories about kids tend to be more interesting, regardless of if those kids are other people's or not.
And not because they're "adorable" but because they tend to teach us the things we've forgotten.
I loved the videos that everyone posted while John was gone, but I'm so glad that John is back!!!
I died when you explained the digging holes thing. It's amazing, the things that will stick in a toddler's mind.
....ummm...I'm from NJ and this was something we did pretty much every time we went to Wildwood. All of the kids would get together and dig the biggest hole possible, sometimes with help from a parent or two. Once we actually had a construction crew like organization with supervisors. We could have set up a couple tents in it that time.
I am Dutch, I support Henry's message
As a fellow Dutch person, I completely agree.
I did some research..
This hole-digging business is actually called a 'strandburg' and it involves digging up a huge hole (they call it a 'trench') and watering the sand to form a solid ring around it. They then proceed to decorate it and sit on it. They return the next day and claim their hole, threatening anyone who dares to occupy it. It's a common thing among German tourists and often leads to quarrels at the beach. lol
Anyway, welcome back John.
The fourth on the great lakes is so much fun. My family once had our own little fireworks competition with Canada.
how much I missed your videos. great to have you back
YES. Definitely. We need that to happen.
Welcome back!!! *hug* we enjoyed the Tuesday Substitutes but so happy to have you back :) Always love to hear children stories. Kids say the darndest things.
I am dying of laughter oh my goodness. John, you're wrong about one thing: stories about other people's kids being adorable are absolutely my favorite.
Oh yes! That would be brilliant! Could be one of the best cameos ever.
Also, I really liked the Henry-and-Germans-digging-holes-in-the-beach story. They (the Germans) do that in Sweden too, and pinch road signs warning for elks.
Researched it. They dig holes for the purpose of sitting in them and can be very defensive of the holes. They love to sit there as opposed to just on the beach
So excited that you're back! And so glad that you had a great break
Exactly. WHATEVER THEY'RE ADORABLE.
We Germans do have dialogue with the Dutch. Namely, in the form of game shows where both nationalities attempt to prove their superiority in disciplines such as holding cheeses within a light barrier and answering as many trivia questions as possible before dropping the cheeses.
I just applaud the fact that John can tell the difference between Dutch an German by listening, some of their respective dialects get pretty similar and as Americans we don't get the best rep for understanding and speaking anything that isn't American English.
We've missed you dearly, John! WELCOME BACK!
I am German, and I spend my childhood summers on dutch beaches and the stereotype is very true.
the german equivalent to building a sandcastle is building a sandcaste you can actually inhabitate. that is a big hole, wide enough to put your towels in, and a circular wall around it. the rationale behind this is that is protects against the wind.
these dutch beaches are very windy and very cold. :-D
I didn't know people are enoyed by this, I find it to be a perfectly rational practice :-P
This CRACKED ME UP. I replayed the "punchline" over and over! There is something so radically funny when a small child says something unexpected!
stories about your kids are amazing KEEP TELLING THEM
Honestly, if you wanted to share more Henry stories, I would watch every one. My daughter turns 4 in a couple weeks, so I complete understand and can relate to the surprises that come with our children becoming truly independent people with their own thoughts, opinions, and understandings of the world. More Henry!
Aww :) As a Michigander, I'm so happy you enjoyed your time here!
Just stumbled upon some of your books in the smallest bookstore I have ever seen here in Germany. Was happily suprised to learn, that the seller was a 41 year old nerdfighter
I Can say - as a German - that also Dutch kids dig holes when I am there for vacation. And I'm often in the Netherlands. It's much harder that the most German expect Dutch people to understand them speaking German.
Oh, my goodness, how did I NOT just put together that you wrote "Fault In Our Stars"? I finished it about a week ago and adored it. Thank you! Also, love your videos :)
Too short! That was too short! We missed you, John!
There was a comment earlier that I can't find, but a real German explained to me that their version of building a sand castle is to build one that people can fit in, so they dig a giant hole with a little wall around it and hang out in there with their towels. The beaches are windy and can get cold, apparently.
JOHN!! So glad you're back and enjoyed your 'time off.'
Lovely to see you again John!
I MISSED YOU!!! John, I'm so happy you're back!
Joohn I missed you I'm so happy you're back nothing against hannah or wheezywaiter but there's just no second John Green! Have an amazing time at VidCon.
PS I'm Dutch and a sketch I saw years ago on tv about someone digging a hole and speaking in a very strange accent with a lot of z's and das ist's makes a lot more sense now.