Omygoodness this is me. God wanted me to see this today because we have a serious problem in my family right now. This is my issue trying to get ahead of the train reck 😢. Thank you for this.
Another great discussion! Profound words for us to really think about. Lysa says, "What's my problem with their problem?" Jim says, "When I try to control what I cannot control, I will be controlled by what I cannot control."
I love the term "thought spirals" I do that aaaaaalllll the time. I FEEL you, Lysa. I do that AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL the stinkin' time. and yes .... after it was said that I need to feel safe ... YEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS ........... THAT is me SPOT ON
This was exactly what I needed to hear. I have a family situation that sometimes keeps me up. I’ve been praying for wisdom. I perceive this is my answer from the Lord. Thank you and God bless you.
My husband passed away 5 years ago, we have three daughters and this is exactly how I live and have lived my life for the last 10-12 years as I raised them. I remember thinking, "If they will just behave and do what I know is right, what I have taught them God says is right, then everything will be fine. Control doesn't work, it doesn't change the unwanted behavior and can even cause the opposite. This has helped me so much as I am struggling so much with my faith, I have the mustard seed tightly gripped in my palm. I promised God I wouldn't deny him, but I am fighting to get back to the faith I have had since I was 12 years old. Because of my husband's death and the story, the journey, we had leading up to it, and since, I am just numb and have taken the "There is NOTHING I can say or do that will change what people do so I do nothing, nothing including praying because of the numbness. Thank you for sharing so openly and teaching skills to cope and overcome.❤
This is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m such an out loud processor! My hubby not so much. I need to cast my cares to the Lord not my poor hubby. ❤❤Love you all for thinking out loud. I wish I could go to lunch with you ! My best friend’s away 😅😊😂. at night when I feel the need to process before going to sleep I’ve learned to put my earbuds in and listen to a book or a podcast I set the timer for 30 minutes and usually I go to sleep. My husband mutes the TV when the political commercials come on because that’s usually what makes me need to process! 😂😂😂Sometimes I listen to you guys then my husband can go to sleep. Sorry for any typos I’m on the elliptical!😂😂
When we are trying to take control of others, we are being manipulative and we probably are needing them to be okay with themselves or with us in order for us to be okay. Thinking we can control others is an illusion. Of course, we may have an influence, but we are not in control of, nor are we responsible for their thoughts, feelings and behavior. Catch ourselves at this. Let God be God. Focus on what is my problem with their problem, what is my responsibility, what do I need. I only have agency over my own thoughts, feelings and behavior.
I love how Joel humbily speaks truth for us to take inventory of what we do, say and think and what God's word said to guide us. God's in control, we need to be obedient and practice stewardship🙏🙏♥️
Thanks Lysa, I love that question " What is my problem with their problem" Self therapy, taking counsel with yourself so good Jim❤❤❤ I practice what I can and can't control love this video, definitely helping me especially my current journey going through divorce
Thank you so much Lysa for this deep and real psychological subject ! Please LORD Help us to change our thoughts 💭 thanks to the HOLY SPIRIT🙏🏾🥹 We just want to live a real free life with JESUS Our Savior and it’s an everyday battlefield in our minds 😫 WE NEED YOU JESUS because we can’t change by ourselves ! ✝️❤️🩹
Lysa I can relate. Thank you for being vulnerable on here.. it helps others (like myself) learn better ways to process. I'm sorry some people are so critical with their comments on here, they should put down their stones and realize we all struggle with different things.
So good! Right now I'm in a low so i needed to be reminded of these things. Some days i just want to give up but I'm holding on to Him. Since 2020, our adult son has been estranged from us and 2021 our adult daughter. What my Papa God has been teaching me is how to live in the grace for one day and sometimes the grace for one minute. This has been one of the hardest seasons I have ever walked through. On top of that, I lost one of my best friends in 2021 and my dad in 2023. All different kinds of grief. I'm allowing the magnifying glass to be turned on me so I can be healthier mentally for the time when my kids do come back. (We have talked to our daughter, off and on) talk about surrendering, trust, letting go everyday to what I can't control. It has been a roller-coaster but in it all, my husband and I have grown closer and are realizing how much our PAPA truly loves us. Thank you for this❤
Conversation is phenomenal!!!! Can you do some programs on empty 🪺 nest and adult children!!! SOS need help on how to do the work on empty 🪺 nest emptiness ❤
I am going through so much similar to you Lisa Terkeurst. So much so I will have to write you a letter with my laptop on your website to capture it all.
Lysa! My bible study group are slated to see you in Bentonville on the 27th - We are praying for God to move in a mighty way! We call on the Holy Spirit to to bring His word to your voice. We pray for souls to be led to the GREAT I AM. We plead for breaking of bondage and loosening of captivity of the mind I am recovering from a life of being overrun and abused emotionally and physically by my mother and my narcissistic alcoholic now ex husband. I have been leaning into and learning how desperately God loves me. I have set boundaries in my life and I have never felt so free and loved by God. I’ve not started dating since my divorce because I am so scared. But if God chooses a spouse for me, I am grateful for His words through your voice to help me be a better woman and wife for him.
How about exchanging all that need to control for learning and practising trust. I am thinking, humbly so, that perhaps set up some trust scenarios and practice a trusting response, might be helpful. Just as a suggestion to get your brain out of the control rut. But don’t practice by learning to trust yourself or others, but trust the ONLY one that is deserving of your complete trust, GOD! No one else, not even yourself, is worthy or deserving of your complete trust!
hello, i’m sorry for this long message. although, this feels wrong/inappropriate to comment on a public comment section… im seeking hope, help, and support in any way that i can. please pray for me. i feel far from God. and i’m struggling with believing the lies of the enemy, about myself, about God and His word. i sometimes open up the word and have so much shame and fear of God and fear of punishment that i end up hearing His word as if everything was aimed at me. i understand that His word convicts and i need conviction.. (well i know i have a ton to work on, i feel like a mess). but it leaves me feeling helpless and condemned. this happens when i listen to some sermons and podcasts too. it’s gotten better but fluctuated. i believe it scrupulosity & religious Ocd. thankfully i have one or two people in the church i can reach out to (they’re not close friends but lovely people) because this feels so isolating. and honestly frightening and overwhelming. i’m struggling to discern what is truly guidance from the Holy Spirit because i’ve been hearing a lot of different things (having so many thoughts). many that accuse. many that make me feel abandoned and without help. many that make me feel incredibly bad about myself. im struggling. i’ve had a lot of spiritual warfare. and this is hard. especially emotionally, it hurts. please keep me in your prayers. this is affecting the way i see God and i don’t want it to. not because of the way it makes me feel but because i start to believe that maybe those thoughts are from Him… simply because i know how imperfect i am, i know i need His grace. truly, i do.i start thinking that maybe im just trying to deceive myself if i don’t believe those thoughts. i want to love Him and love His word. but i need help and support. thank you so much. thank you in advance for any prayer🤍 🤍😭🙏
Ultimately u are trying to controll the person u are insisting on processing your spiraling thoughts. I love u and your work but I do see u as controlling. Those of us who are concerned ab our safety and protection are controlling. U sound like me and I am 76yo. My husband was not happy when I felt I needed to process and he did not. I live to hear you bc I so relate
For once I don’t agree with this. I think what Lysa is doing is she’s almost like a mentor. When I see what my sisters or daughters are doing with their life like who they are dating or things they are doing (they are all 12-19 years younger than me)… I will share with them stories and scenarios. Most of the time I have been right. This is called wisdom & not being passive.
Omygoodness this is me. God wanted me to see this today because we have a serious problem in my family right now. This is my issue trying to get ahead of the train reck 😢. Thank you for this.
Another great discussion! Profound words for us to really think about. Lysa says, "What's my problem with their problem?" Jim says, "When I try to control what I cannot control, I will be controlled by what I cannot control."
I love the term "thought spirals" I do that aaaaaalllll the time. I FEEL you, Lysa. I do that AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL the stinkin' time. and yes .... after it was said that I need to feel safe ... YEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS ........... THAT is me SPOT ON
This was exactly what I needed to hear. I have a family situation that sometimes keeps me up. I’ve been praying for wisdom. I perceive this is my answer from the Lord. Thank you and God bless you.
My husband passed away 5 years ago, we have three daughters and this is exactly how I live and have lived my life for the last 10-12 years as I raised them. I remember thinking, "If they will just behave and do what I know is right, what I have taught them God says is right, then everything will be fine. Control doesn't work, it doesn't change the unwanted behavior and can even cause the opposite. This has helped me so much as I am struggling so much with my faith, I have the mustard seed tightly gripped in my palm. I promised God I wouldn't deny him, but I am fighting to get back to the faith I have had since I was 12 years old. Because of my husband's death and the story, the journey, we had leading up to it, and since, I am just numb and have taken the "There is NOTHING I can say or do that will change what people do so I do nothing, nothing including praying because of the numbness. Thank you for sharing so openly and teaching skills to cope and overcome.❤
This is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m such an out loud processor! My hubby not so much. I need to cast my cares to the Lord not my poor hubby. ❤❤Love you all for thinking out loud. I wish I could go to lunch with you ! My best friend’s away 😅😊😂. at night when I feel the need to process before going to sleep I’ve learned to put my earbuds in and listen to a book or a podcast I set the timer for 30 minutes and usually I go to sleep. My husband mutes the TV when the political commercials come on because that’s usually what makes me need to process! 😂😂😂Sometimes I listen to you guys then my husband can go to sleep. Sorry for any typos I’m on the elliptical!😂😂
I will pray for you
I understand completely what you are saying. Go listen to the song "He Will Hold Me Fast." I pray it will strengthen and comfort you.
Lysa - thank you for your transparency! You’re a gifted communicator, appreciating the content you share. Relatable ❤😢😊
So pleased you remarried
I couldn't agree more!
This was so unbelievably and incredibly helpful! My thanks to all three of you! 👏🏻🙏🏻👍🏻❤️😁
When we are trying to take control of others, we are being manipulative and we probably are needing them to be okay with themselves or with us in order for us to be okay. Thinking we can control others is an illusion. Of course, we may have an influence, but we are not in control of, nor are we responsible for their thoughts, feelings and behavior.
Catch ourselves at this. Let God be God. Focus on what is my problem with their problem, what is my responsibility, what do I need. I only have agency over my own thoughts, feelings and behavior.
I’m praying you find peace where there has been pain in your life! 🙏🏼
Needed this today ❤
I love how Joel humbily speaks truth for us to take inventory of what we do, say and think and what God's word said to guide us. God's in control, we need to be obedient and practice stewardship🙏🙏♥️
Thanks Lysa, I love that question " What is my problem with their problem" Self therapy, taking counsel with yourself so good Jim❤❤❤
I practice what I can and can't control love this video, definitely helping me especially my current journey going through divorce
Thank you for this. Your transparency is a precious gift. I am in tears, being led back to the heart of God while I listen.
Thank you so much Lysa for this deep and real psychological subject !
Please LORD Help us to change our thoughts 💭 thanks to the HOLY SPIRIT🙏🏾🥹
We just want to live a real free life with JESUS Our Savior and it’s an everyday battlefield in our minds 😫 WE NEED YOU JESUS because we can’t change by ourselves ! ✝️❤️🩹
Lysa I can relate. Thank you for being vulnerable on here.. it helps others (like myself) learn better ways to process. I'm sorry some people are so critical with their comments on here, they should put down their stones and realize we all struggle with different things.
Can you recommend a self therapy book and also the book Lysa was talking about (Leslie)?
100% this is how I feel!
So good! Right now I'm in a low so i needed to be reminded of these things. Some days i just want to give up but I'm holding on to Him.
Since 2020, our adult son has been estranged from us and 2021 our adult daughter. What my Papa God has been teaching me is how to live in the grace for one day and sometimes the grace for one minute. This has been one of the hardest seasons I have ever walked through. On top of that, I lost one of my best friends in 2021 and my dad in 2023. All different kinds of grief. I'm allowing the magnifying glass to be turned on me so I can be healthier mentally for the time when my kids do come back. (We have talked to our daughter, off and on) talk about surrendering, trust, letting go everyday to what I can't control. It has been a roller-coaster but in it all, my husband and I have grown closer and are realizing how much our PAPA truly loves us. Thank you for this❤
Whoa! This is brilliant! Thank you guys for another incredible episode!
Thanks for watching!
I needed this so much!
Thankyou
Conversation is phenomenal!!!! Can you do some programs on empty 🪺 nest and adult children!!! SOS need help on how to do the work on empty 🪺 nest emptiness ❤
Wow!
So good! Took notes. Thank yall
Amen Different can still be good
Yep. I so understand, sadly.
Absolutely loved this! Wisdom and discernment ❤
I am going through so much similar to you Lisa Terkeurst. So much so I will have to write you a letter with my laptop on your website to capture it all.
Lysa! My bible study group are slated to see you in Bentonville on the 27th - We are praying for God to move in a mighty way! We call on the Holy Spirit to to bring His word to your voice. We pray for souls to be led to the GREAT I AM. We plead for breaking of bondage and loosening of
captivity of the mind
I am recovering from a life of being overrun and abused emotionally and physically by my mother and my narcissistic alcoholic now ex husband. I have been leaning into and learning how desperately God loves me. I have set boundaries in my life and I have never felt so free and loved by God.
I’ve not started dating since my divorce because I am so scared. But if God chooses a spouse for me, I am grateful for His words through your voice to help me be a better woman and wife for him.
Jim Cress is a GOAT
🙏❤
Da squad
How about exchanging all that need to control for learning and practising trust. I am thinking, humbly so, that perhaps set up some trust scenarios and practice a trusting response, might be helpful. Just as a suggestion to get your brain out of the control rut. But don’t practice by learning to trust yourself or others, but trust the ONLY one that is deserving of your complete trust, GOD! No one else, not even yourself, is worthy or deserving of your complete trust!
hello, i’m sorry for this long message. although, this feels wrong/inappropriate to comment on a public comment section… im seeking hope, help, and support in any way that i can. please pray for me. i feel far from God. and i’m struggling with believing the lies of the enemy, about myself, about God and His word. i sometimes open up the word and have so much shame and fear of God and fear of punishment that i end up hearing His word as if everything was aimed at me. i understand that His word convicts and i need conviction.. (well i know i have a ton to work on, i feel like a mess). but it leaves me feeling helpless and condemned. this happens when i listen to some sermons and podcasts too. it’s gotten better but fluctuated. i believe it scrupulosity & religious Ocd. thankfully i have one or two people in the church i can reach out to (they’re not close friends but lovely people) because this feels so isolating. and honestly frightening and overwhelming. i’m struggling to discern what is truly guidance from the Holy Spirit because i’ve been hearing a lot of different things (having so many thoughts). many that accuse. many that make me feel abandoned and without help. many that make me feel incredibly bad about myself. im struggling. i’ve had a lot of spiritual warfare. and this is hard. especially emotionally, it hurts. please keep me in your prayers. this is affecting the way i see God and i don’t want it to. not because of the way it makes me feel but because i start to believe that maybe those thoughts are from Him… simply because i know how imperfect i am, i know i need His grace. truly, i do.i start thinking that maybe im just trying to deceive myself if i don’t believe those thoughts. i want to love Him and love His word. but i need help and support. thank you so much. thank you in advance for any prayer🤍
🤍😭🙏
Ultimately u are trying to controll the person u are insisting on processing your spiraling thoughts. I love u and your work but I do see u as controlling. Those of us who are concerned ab our safety and protection are controlling. U sound like me and I am 76yo. My husband was not happy when I felt I needed to process and he did not. I live to hear you bc I so relate
We are NOT God! Sometimes we need a reminder.
I need that reminder daily
For once I don’t agree with this. I think what Lysa is doing is she’s almost like a mentor. When I see what my sisters or daughters are doing with their life like who they are dating or things they are doing (they are all 12-19 years younger than me)… I will share with them stories and scenarios. Most of the time I have been right. This is called wisdom & not being passive.
Maybe take some time off and just learn to be married all over again….❤