Adrian is my half-brother. Watching this interview is the first time that I have seen him in about 8 years. This is not the same person that I grew up with as a child nor is this the same person that my mother raised. I can't speak to his prison life but I will tell you the life he spoke of was not entirely true. He grew up in Albuquerque until he was about 4 then my mother moved them to California where he did live in the cities named until my mother met my father and they had me. Home life wasnt this picture of violence he portrays. We had all that we needed and then some. My father is/was a great provider. The uncle he speaks of in the beginning,Randy Castillo is not our uncle he may have been a family friend of our ACTUAL uncle who is also a drummer. And no our uncle isn't dead nor has he ever had cancer. He was not with Ozzy Osbourne for 16 years. Yes he is a drummer, he is a renowned drummer in a lot of circles but he is not dead. Adrian has struggled with alcohol addiction and substance abuse since he was about 14. He has four confirmed children in which he never played a part of their life because the drugs played a larger part in his. He has deeply hurt all those around him all those who attempted to help him. He has stolen from, lied to, manipulated, and deceived all those that love him. He says he's ashamed and that he doesn't want his daughter to see him this way but I will tell you this his children are who they are not because of him but in spite of him. The only children that he has lost are the ones that have opted to not be apart of his life. NONE OF HIS CHILDREN ARE DECEASED. He has also has NEVER had cancer. .My mother spent most of her life trying to save him. She died 4 years ago while he was doing yet another term in prison.When she passed his only words to me were that "mom used to send me money whatcam i gonna do now" He has now remorse for anythingvhe put her through or thecstress he caused till her last breath. I know that he is an addict and that his addiction is essentially stronger than his own will to live. His story leaves out the turmoil and heartbreak that it caused everyone around him. Being an addict he has the luxury of forgetting or not being able to remember all the things he has done where as those who have loved him remember it all!
His story felt off for a lot of reasons. It’s a shame so many of the Soft White Underbelly interviewees feel the need to lie or greatly embellish their life stories since the truth is usually far more captivating than any surface-level lie. Anyhow, thanks for commenting and allowing us viewers to understand another perspective.
Selfishness, entitlement, and running away from suffering that is inherent to life is the modus operandi of addicts. Depression, trauma, and anxiety befall us all. It has since time immemorial. Addicts don’t think they should have to suffer. They leave only a wake of devastation wherever and to whomever they touch. I wish Mark would stop pitying these people. They made their choice, and continue to every moment they’re alive. Addicts have given themselves over to evil. They are evildoers.
This is my favorite so far. The glaring contrasts - Adrian looks like both a little boy, and an old man. He looks the part of a hardened criminal, but has such a deep and amazing insight and sensitivity. I’m rooting for you, Adrian. Get clean before the cancer takes you. Tell your wife you’re sorry. Kiss your daughter. Leave light and peace when you go- please give yourself a break and step away from the darkness. You. Can. I’ll be keeping you in my prayers, Mijo ⭐️🫀⭐️
Today I lost my oldest brother to a fentanyl overdose. They found him under a bridge. I am so sad. Today I pray for recovery for all addicts of all drugs.
Sorry to hear that, man. There’s a reason so many ppl are hooked on drugs, though: to try and cover up the pain, physical or emotional. It’s sad, but at least he’s not in pain any more. I lost my best friend to an overdose 11 yrs ago. You will eventually get through this, it’s gonna hurt for a while though. Best regards.
I'm so incredibly sorry to hear this. I lost my brother to a fentanyl overdose too. It's hard, but I'm here for you. I pray that you find some comfort and peace.
Adrian, when you cried about your daughter and how you don't want her to be ashamed of you it broke my heart. You are her father and her heart longs for you and your love. You deserve to be healthy enough to provide her with what she needs from you. You are a valuable person who is worthy of love, health and happiness. If you are strong enough to live this lifestyle you are strong enough to fight for your sobriety. You are not defined by your past, your trauma, or your mistakes. All of the power to change your life and improve your circumstances are within you. Sending you my love and encouragement 💞
@John Smith spreading negativity and hate is a hobby for some people unfortunately. Imagine what would happen if they used that energy to be nice and spread love instead 🤔
@John Smith absolutely right, I know if I was backed into a corner I'd do all I could to survive, especially now I'm a mummy, I definitely know I'd kill for my daughter if need be. End of......
It is never too late! I always thought I could never do it. Everyone that loved me thought that too, that there was something else wrong with me. I just couldn’t stop, but then one day I saw a sign. I was trying to sleep in my car but couldn’t because I was right down the street from a hospital, and the flashing red ER sign was keeping me awake. Then I broke down and realized that maybe it was a sign from God. I went and asked for help. Yesterday I had 4 years and 6 months clean from a 27 year addiction. I have my amazing husband and children in my life, the rest of my family too. I know that if I could do it, anyone can. Thank you, again, Mark for another awesome interview! We can and do recover!
I've watched alot of your stuff..really powerful. Thankgod I had a stable upbringing..not perfect but loving. 95% of the people I listen to on here unfortunately haven't. It tells you how fundamental it is to have love and nurturing around you as a child. The ripple impact into adulthood can be truly devastating. Take care Adrian, I hope you find peace. The path you took was through no fault of your own. You were just a kid thrown into the clusterfeck of choas around you.
It’s so true! I had a hard childhood and I started going down a wrong path and then got tired of it and changed at 22-25. Now I’m married with two beautiful girls and an amazing husband and I feel really lucky. I make sure to do everything opposite and make sure my kids are loved. Everyone says I’m too nice because I’ll sit there when my daughter is upset and get to the root of it instead of dismissing her or telling her to stop crying etc. i do everything for my girls and honestly I need to give myself some self care which I’m really needing, but I feel for these people who have lives broken since they were young. I get really sad seeing the young girls/boys it breaks my heart. All of theeee people deserve a chance at a wonderful life, and I love that mark let’s them at least share their story and be heard even for that moment. I remember feeling like crap on drugs and for people to just sit and listen and be empathetic to me meant the world. It takes one listening ear to change someone’s life.
Adrian, Sending you so much love, encouragement, & grace. I hope you find the healing & strength you very much still deserve. You are loved, this I promise.
From the perspective of a 46 year old who’s parents were addicts, this interview brought tears to my eyes. This was a very powerful interview and thank you for sharing your story.
One of my favorite interviews to date. His story broke my heart in every way. I wish him nothing but healing and peace. Mark, thank you for doing what you do.
This one hit different. Thank you Adrian for sharing your story. Listen to your own wisdom. Every time you want to score, "change that bad decision" and think of your daughter. Get into a program, find a sponsor, do the work to stay sober. We are rooting for you 🖤 Thank you Mark for what you do. Update on Adrian in the future please.
It’s incredible how you find so many people who’ve been through situations like this. You never know what people have gone through and what leads them to this type of lifestyle. Its truly incredible to see the ripple effects of a broken home. As someone who comes from one it always humbles me to know that my life could have been very different and it’s the way you deal with trauma and hardship that makes all the difference. But I don’t blame this man or anyone who lives like this because they deserved a better childhood plus Mixed with poverty it’s easy to make these bad decisions 🥺 I wish him all the best
@@Obiamajoyisrmd Well. I didn't even start watching yet. I like to get an impression from the comments first. Why are you going after me though? Don't you see the point I'm making? 😄 These people don't deserve to be exploited. You as an MD should know, shouldn't you?
@@James-ck4bg (1) asked you a question - why do you care. That’s not coming after you. (2) by asking if they “deserve to be exploited” requires the acceptance of the false presumption that they Are being exploited. So one has to contend with that first. Are they being exploited yes or no. I’m sure you have an opinion on that.
@@Obiamajoyisrmd man you're just telling me in way too complicated and correct language that I don't have enough proof. Well, where I come from we listen first before we react. It's an act of respect. And if someone is 3 minutes in of telling his life story of 30+ minutes, while the other person with (surprise surprise) a growing channel has already posted her long ass overly empathic conclusions at the 3 minute mark, it will just come off as a fraud. She couldn't even bother to listen to the rest of the story, but immediately started typing her comment. You can tell me there's lack of evidence, I'll tell you you're just looking away.
Your raw truth is admirable. I lost my brother to fentanyl on August 2, 2020. He was my best friend. He left behind my two wonderful nephews. Trust me when I say your daughter would rather have you alive than not. My brother died alone. Not a day goes by that I wish I would have done more to help, if I'd known he was going to relapse. Don't give up. Go see your daughter no matter way. It's never, ever too late, my friend!
Wow Adrien, sending you lots of healing energy. I hope you can listen to your body and get some healing soon. You’ve got an awesome energy, despite all you’ve gone through. I wish you peace.
Thank you for giving respect to those forgotten. He’s very genuine and introspective. It could easily be me. I am able to keep my depression hidden by fitting into general society. That’s due to the resources at my disposal. Not everyone has that. And that’s what your work does. Reminds us how easily it could be anyone and that we are all human. It’s clear you didn’t do this for notoriety. You tapped into something special that connects us all as humans. ❤️
I hope he gets the help he needs. I hope this is your reminder, if you forgot, that there is a human behind each and every one of these stories. Sending love Adrian, your stronger than you know.
What a real sweetie Adrian is. Funny, full of plenty of stories and also loves his kids and is aware of the situation he's got himself in. God I wish he could muster up the strength and courage to kick the fent. I hope he overcomes his cancer. Thanks Mark for another awesome vid. 🙏
This interview is one of the most touching. He is grateful and knows how to overcome, I hope he makes that choice. Wish him the best. Sending prayers for him. If you haven't used an outhouse, carried water to cook, clean and bathe with, then you should be more than grateful. I didn't know indoor plumbing until 6th grade. I didn't know we were poor until society told me I was. I was shocked to hear this happened in other parts. I grew up Appalachian and only thought that level of poverty existed in the Mtns.
I was born and raised in DDR (East Germany) before the wall came down. I had to smile when he talked about the younger kids always got the clean water in the tub. It was the complete opposite in my world. I was the youngest and got the old dirty water at the end.
Thanks Adrian. It got thru to me when you said it's never too late to change and find the place you are Meant to be - not the place you Want to be necessarily. I needed to hear that. Thank you Mark for a place to hear Adrian's story.
Adrian, like you said, it's never too late. Dude, call your daughter. I promise she won't care about your drug use ,she just wants her dad. You need to take care of your health and get straight with your child. Take care of yourself ❤
Randolpho Francisco Castillo (December 18, 1950 - March 26, 2002)[2] was an American musician. He was Ozzy Osbourne's drummer during the mid-1980s to the early 1990s, and later as drummer for Mötley Crüe, from 1999 to his death in 2002.
Adrian you said it yourself, “it’s never too late”! You have more life to life. Make the change. Run, don’t walk, to your daughter and your wife. I am praying for your healing, happiness & peace. This interview was one of the best Mark. 🤍
That life gave me the same war wounds. My head looks like a F’n road map now that I’m bald. But it looks like his new one might be getting infected. He ain’t lying about fentanyl being waaaay harder to quit than heroin. Adrian, I hope you can get on your feet. I wish you the best and I hope you make it brotha. From a dope fiend in NYC. Stay up!
@@sabrinachamberlain5150 by stopping. The same way with any drug. Resolve. Utter pain with complete resolve. Here in Chicago it’s not only fentanyl. It’s also xylazine. Tranq dope. It’s literally killing us. The usual go to’s like methadone and subs barely work. The heroin supply is forever ruined. Thanks to the war on drugs and greed. It’s possible to stop. It’s just been made even harder. Evil.
I remember one time In school I took a Xanax that had fent in it next thing I know my friends were telling me I was crawling in the hallways so messed up during passing period. Three years later I’ve had multiple seizures due to Xanax withdrawal, all separate times so I’ve had probably 6 seizures, 2 in front of my mom and one in front of my dad. Sober now though and lucky dodged jail time for the things I did on Xanax a year ago. Don’t do it. Take it from someone who doesn’t listen to anybody’s advice. Being only 18 I realize I might need help later.
Xanax withdrawal is more dangerous than heroin withdrawal. Also there’s no Xanax version of Suboxon to help you through. Hope ur doing better now. A friend of mine had seizures and he also started turning yellow from his kidneys were starting to fail.
I’ve been prescribed Xanax for 6 years and use it responsibly as needed. I use a quarter of the recommended dose, when needed; rarely, not daily. If you use it responsibly it’s great for overwhelming stress or moments that can lead to panic attacks.
Thanks for sharing mate, please never abruptly stop Xanax “alprazolam” make sure if you ever relapse’ make sure you taper off it gradually & slowly so you’re body doesn’t get a shock… stopping any benzodiazepine suddenly can & will cause these seizures. So awesome you’re sober, we are Human & not perfect, we all make mistakes! Don’t ever blame yourself, it’s about intent at the end of the day… & being addicted to a substance doesn’t mean you have bad intent to hurt others, sad thing is you were hurting yourself, so many people are addicted, you’re not alone! I wish you all the best, love from a person from Australia :-)
Mark, Excellent work! God bless you, Adrian. You are aware that you are dying and your pain is being disconnected from your daughter. Call your daughter, Adrian! Let her know how much you love her before it is too late.
I love all the videos! Mark you have a with people that’s amazing. You speak very soft and genuine These videos are truly a wake up call for me! It’s sad people make choices like this
Mark you have a true natural ability to communicate with all kinds of people and pass absolutely no judgment, thank you for all your hard work & dedication to showing the World that everyone has a story… & for many life can be extremely tough, & growing up in a broken Home & Un healed trauma seems to be the root cause for mental illness & substance abuse….. I myself am a chronic pain sufferer & have CPTSD- the most horrible form of PTSD you can have…So I am on prescription medication for pain & some serious anxiety. I was diagnosed with M.S at 18yo & other serious chronic illness, so i have had many years to research about substance being 35yo now, & in my case it’s “pharmaceuticals” which are basically legal illicit substance. In my case i have never abused my medication & I don’t like being on meds’ but sadly in order to function I require it. Everyone has a story’ Life isn’t easy & I’m sure if I came from a “Broken home” I would probably abuse my medication & probably drink alcohol too… Watching these interviews makes me realise how truly blessed I am to have a beautiful home & family I absolutely adore.! I’m fully aware Big Pharma is a BIG business! But we have to do what we have to do to survive. I feel so sorry for people hooked on illicit drugs that live rough, & on the streets as I lay in my warm big bed :-( these people are often treated less than animals & they must feel “invisible” lots don’t have families & have so much trauma that hasn’t healed, they have seemingly “fallen through the cracks in the broken system”. God bless these poor wounded souls…! They must feel absolutely lost in a cold world. I never judge others, regardless of their situation, race, sexuality, mental stability & “social status” a soul is a soul- a homeless heroin addicts soul, or prostitute that’s hooked on meth is just as valuable & equal to a millionaire that lives in a mansion & drives a Lamborghini, when all Humans realise this’ the world would be a much better place. Blessings to all these beautiful lost souls, may they know they are valued & loved by many people who have big hearts & no judgment. Peace & Love from a Person from the land down under! :-)
Randy was a badass drummer. My friend Sarah used to have a big crush on him. Slash & Randy were 2 rockers she wanted to marry when we were in high school back in 92~96
As someone who knows the addiction struggles with opiates , being high and thinking about your kids … being ashamed of being High but needing to get high to not feel only to feel harder it’s so hard to explain. I consider myself lucky
Why doesnt anyone mention getting high because they're waking up sick in withdrawl every day? I wasted 20 years chasing withdrawls away.. in the beggining, at 19, I was trying to get high, within a few months I was trying not to be sick! Then 20 years went by doing the same thing everyday..
Adrian 🏆 you are more than you give yourself credit to be. AmAzing journey - keep going. A great fentanyl story- the best. Good vibes and Blessings and Healings 🙏🏻
Imagine how it would be if every person who decided to “make a statement”, and who also did everything “ten times” as extreme, chose a course of conduct to solve the problems of the world.
Oh man, my heart goes out. Listen to me Adrian, your daughter needs you. And you need her. Recovery from Fentanyl is possible. People are doing it everyday. The question you gotta ask yourself is, "How willing am I?" It's time to get honest and stay that way...
I used a outhouse for several years in my earlier years. It was so cold in the heart of winter. At my granny’s she had a 2 seater outhouse and the grandkids were piling up so my dad and uncle built a 4 seater. We thought we was walking in high cotton now. It didn’t go all the way to the ground and that cold wind would come under the outhouse and right up the seat we were setting in. I wouldn’t trade them memories for this stinking world.
Adrian, Use that emotion you're feeling when your thinking about your daughter to kick addiction in the ass. There is a higher power, God, who is ready to help you
Real deal right here. I can tell..wow.. I can see he used to be Alot bigger/ heavier too. Hope he can finally sometime soon?.. Find some Peace.. Godspeed man.. Never say die or quit trying to get ok.
Mark, you should really go to Albuquerque some day. There are so many interesting people here and I bet they have some amazing stories to tell. It’s an amazing city and there are people from all walks of life here!
Changing your attitude towards life is tough when you live in a "comfort zone" like Los Angeles. A guesstimated 20,000 more comfort zone seekers are expected to relocate to the L.A. area in 2022. Always interesting, thanks!
Yup…three meals a day…sometimes free housing…free showers, washroom, cell phones……hard to think how any of this helps since its clearly not helping. People don’t need free things….they need purpose…they should be made to work for things. They’d feel better about themselves….I’ve even read some idiot liberals want to give them free drugs and safe places to shoot up..absolutely insane.
That story about the cops murdering him and then ruling it the way they did….I had never thought about that before……but it makes all the sense in the world.
What is super sad is “fentanyl pills “is so common in my area we all carry narcan and when my dog tasted puke outside a bar before I could stop him.. as gross as it was 🤮I was more worried he ingested fentanyl. So much sadness!
Wow i never thought of how that could endanger dogs in that way. The fenty crisis in America is ridiculous. I'm shocked every time I go back at the number of urban zombies.
Ace, I don't know if you'll ever read these comments but Kaylyn and I miss you so much. Please reach out to one of us. We love you and could get you the resources you need. I love you, Asia Marie
I knew his biggest fear would be something pertaining to death.. always these guys who are "killers", have no problem taking the lives of others but cant bear the thought of their own mortality.. i saw a vid where a death row inmate that killed his girlfriend and her young daughter was crying like a baby the day before execution.. these men are something else! Never heard of consequences, karma ?
I've never, ever known any instance where an adult forces a kid to smoke to teach a lesson and that kid doesn't end up smoking later in life...never. It does the exact opposite of teaching a lesson every time.
It's not that it kicked in. Fentanyl hits right then and there. The video is cut because mark gave him a break and he used. Many of the addicts in these videos take breaks to use.
@@tyriexs5 me too, i cant function without medication, and its been 5 yrs, but i like to believe that its Never too late , and that there's Always an open door.....
“How did you get that bruise on your head?” “I don’t know man.. I was fighting this dude.. next thing I know, I’m just sitting there at the park” That’ll do it 😂
Look ,one of the reasons you can't quit is because in your wors you would use then quit. Use then quit. What happens is each time we use then quit. The next gets harder. Now if you want to quit you are going to have to work. And it will take a lot. I know I was where you are at my man. I was dope sick for a year. It came back.
Adrian is my half-brother. Watching this interview is the first time that I have seen him in about 8 years. This is not the same person that I grew up with as a child nor is this the same person that my mother raised. I can't speak to his prison life but I will tell you the life he spoke of was not entirely true. He grew up in Albuquerque until he was about 4 then my mother moved them to California where he did live in the cities named until my mother met my father and they had me. Home life wasnt this picture of violence he portrays. We had all that we needed and then some. My father is/was a great provider. The uncle he speaks of in the beginning,Randy Castillo is not our uncle he may have been a family friend of our ACTUAL uncle who is also a drummer. And no our uncle isn't dead nor has he ever had cancer. He was not with Ozzy Osbourne for 16 years.
Yes he is a drummer, he is a renowned drummer in a lot of circles but he is not dead. Adrian has struggled with alcohol addiction and substance abuse since he was about 14. He has four confirmed children in which he never played a part of their life because the drugs played a larger part in his. He has deeply hurt all those around him all those who attempted to help him. He has stolen from, lied to, manipulated, and deceived all those that love him. He says he's ashamed and that he doesn't want his daughter to see him this way but I will tell you this his children are who they are not because of him but in spite of him. The only children that he has lost are the ones that have opted to not be apart of his life. NONE OF HIS CHILDREN ARE DECEASED. He has also has NEVER had cancer. .My mother spent most of her life trying to save him. She died 4 years ago while he was doing yet another term in prison.When she passed his only words to me were that "mom used to send me money whatcam i gonna do now" He has now remorse for anythingvhe put her through or thecstress he caused till her last breath. I know that he is an addict and that his addiction is essentially stronger than his own will to live. His story leaves out the turmoil and heartbreak that it caused everyone around him. Being an addict he has the luxury of forgetting or not being able to remember all the things he has done where as those who have loved him remember it all!
His story felt off for a lot of reasons. It’s a shame so many of the Soft White Underbelly interviewees feel the need to lie or greatly embellish their life stories since the truth is usually far more captivating than any surface-level lie.
Anyhow, thanks for commenting and allowing us viewers to understand another perspective.
This comment should be pinned to the top of the comment section.
Seriously, so people don't fall for his "bull shit. Some people are just selfish a holes..End of story.
Selfishness, entitlement, and running away from suffering that is inherent to life is the modus operandi of addicts. Depression, trauma, and anxiety befall us all. It has since time immemorial. Addicts don’t think they should have to suffer. They leave only a wake of devastation wherever and to whomever they touch. I wish Mark would stop pitying these people. They made their choice, and continue to every moment they’re alive. Addicts have given themselves over to evil. They are evildoers.
I believe you 100 percent. So basically hes just a rambling junky at this point full of nithin but bullshit licin hos dope life... So sad
This is my favorite so far. The glaring contrasts - Adrian looks like both a little boy, and an old man. He looks the part of a hardened criminal, but has such a deep and amazing insight and sensitivity. I’m rooting for you, Adrian. Get clean before the cancer takes you. Tell your wife you’re sorry. Kiss your daughter. Leave light and peace when you go- please give yourself a break and step away from the darkness. You. Can.
I’ll be keeping you in my prayers, Mijo ⭐️🫀⭐️
Indeed..
Sweet truth. He’s definitely got a very genuine energy. I wish him peace too
Today I lost my oldest brother to a fentanyl overdose. They found him under a bridge. I am so sad. Today I pray for recovery for all addicts of all drugs.
Sorry to hear that, man. There’s a reason so many ppl are hooked on drugs, though: to try and cover up the pain, physical or emotional. It’s sad, but at least he’s not in pain any more. I lost my best friend to an overdose 11 yrs ago. You will eventually get through this, it’s gonna hurt for a while though. Best regards.
@@viciousdope66 thank you so much!
My condolences. Lost my brother to heroin laced with fentanyl back in September 2019.
I'm so incredibly sorry to hear this. I lost my brother to a fentanyl overdose too. It's hard, but I'm here for you. I pray that you find some comfort and peace.
lost my brother to fentanyl overdose - august 22, 2014.
Adrian, when you cried about your daughter and how you don't want her to be ashamed of you it broke my heart. You are her father and her heart longs for you and your love. You deserve to be healthy enough to provide her with what she needs from you. You are a valuable person who is worthy of love, health and happiness. If you are strong enough to live this lifestyle you are strong enough to fight for your sobriety. You are not defined by your past, your trauma, or your mistakes. All of the power to change your life and improve your circumstances are within you. Sending you my love and encouragement 💞
Aww how nice. He's such a sweet (murdering) boy
@John Smith spreading negativity and hate is a hobby for some people unfortunately. Imagine what would happen if they used that energy to be nice and spread love instead 🤔
@John Smith absolutely right, I know if I was backed into a corner I'd do all I could to survive, especially now I'm a mummy, I definitely know I'd kill for my daughter if need be. End of......
@John Smith bloody right 🇬🇧 💞 🇺🇸 ✌🏻 💗
@John Smith agree. The man has suffered greatly. Don’t judge him until you have walked out his shoes.
It is never too late! I always thought I could never do it. Everyone that loved me thought that too, that there was something else wrong with me. I just couldn’t stop, but then one day I saw a sign. I was trying to sleep in my car but couldn’t because I was right down the street from a hospital, and the flashing red ER sign was keeping me awake. Then I broke down and realized that maybe it was a sign from God. I went and asked for help. Yesterday I had 4 years and 6 months clean from a 27 year addiction. I have my amazing husband and children in my life, the rest of my family too. I know that if I could do it, anyone can. Thank you, again, Mark for another awesome interview! We can and do recover!
Congratulations 🎉 It's always inspiring to hear about those that fought through, and came out on the other side. Respect and love, to you.
I've watched alot of your stuff..really powerful. Thankgod I had a stable upbringing..not perfect but loving. 95% of the people I listen to on here unfortunately haven't. It tells you how fundamental it is to have love and nurturing around you as a child. The ripple impact into adulthood can be truly devastating. Take care Adrian, I hope you find peace. The path you took was through no fault of your own. You were just a kid thrown into the clusterfeck of choas around you.
It’s so true! I had a hard childhood and I started going down a wrong path and then got tired of it and changed at 22-25. Now I’m married with two beautiful girls and an amazing husband and I feel really lucky. I make sure to do everything opposite and make sure my kids are loved. Everyone says I’m too nice because I’ll sit there when my daughter is upset and get to the root of it instead of dismissing her or telling her to stop crying etc. i do everything for my girls and honestly I need to give myself some self care which I’m really needing, but I feel for these people who have lives broken since they were young. I get really sad seeing the young girls/boys it breaks my heart. All of theeee people deserve a chance at a wonderful life, and I love that mark let’s them at least share their story and be heard even for that moment. I remember feeling like crap on drugs and for people to just sit and listen and be empathetic to me meant the world. It takes one listening ear to change someone’s life.
@@theblackschaos ❤️👏👏👏
Adrian,
Sending you so much love, encouragement, & grace. I hope you find the healing & strength you very much still deserve. You are loved, this I promise.
From the perspective of a 46 year old who’s parents were addicts, this interview brought tears to my eyes. This was a very powerful interview and thank you for sharing your story.
Adrian, you're an amazing person going through what seems like hell, and as an addict, myself- we really have to keep on keeping on. Love, and peace
He seems like such a cool dude. I am so sad to hear his sory I really hope you get better man. I will pray for you ❤
This was truly the best interview you have done! I truly believe this guest was sincere and honest . awesome video 👍
One of my favorite interviews to date. His story broke my heart in every way. I wish him nothing but healing and peace. Mark, thank you for doing what you do.
“It’s easier to lay down than to fight anymore” 🖤
This one hit different.
Thank you Adrian for sharing your story. Listen to your own wisdom. Every time you want to score, "change that bad decision" and think of your daughter. Get into a program, find a sponsor, do the work to stay sober. We are rooting for you 🖤 Thank you Mark for what you do. Update on Adrian in the future please.
Addiction is a powerful thing that does not listen to reason. It's a horrible cycle!
It’s incredible how you find so many people who’ve been through situations like this. You never know what people have gone through and what leads them to this type of lifestyle. Its truly incredible to see the ripple effects of a broken home. As someone who comes from one it always humbles me to know that my life could have been very different and it’s the way you deal with trauma and hardship that makes all the difference. But I don’t blame this man or anyone who lives like this because they deserved a better childhood plus Mixed with poverty it’s easy to make these bad decisions 🥺 I wish him all the best
Lol. Did you just cut, paste and delete your past comment because I told you you placed it after only 3 minutes the video was up?
@@James-ck4bg why do you care? Watch the video.
@@Obiamajoyisrmd Well. I didn't even start watching yet. I like to get an impression from the comments first.
Why are you going after me though? Don't you see the point I'm making? 😄
These people don't deserve to be exploited. You as an MD should know, shouldn't you?
@@James-ck4bg
(1) asked you a question - why do you care. That’s not coming after you.
(2) by asking if they “deserve to be exploited” requires the acceptance of the false presumption that they Are being exploited. So one has to contend with that first. Are they being exploited yes or no. I’m sure you have an opinion on that.
@@Obiamajoyisrmd man you're just telling me in way too complicated and correct language that I don't have enough proof.
Well, where I come from we listen first before we react. It's an act of respect. And if someone is 3 minutes in of telling his life story of 30+ minutes, while the other person with (surprise surprise) a growing channel has already posted her long ass overly empathic conclusions at the 3 minute mark, it will just come off as a fraud. She couldn't even bother to listen to the rest of the story, but immediately started typing her comment.
You can tell me there's lack of evidence, I'll tell you you're just looking away.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“I don’t know, my eyes just want to cry.” 😭
Your raw truth is admirable. I lost my brother to fentanyl on August 2, 2020. He was my best friend. He left behind my two wonderful nephews. Trust me when I say your daughter would rather have you alive than not. My brother died alone. Not a day goes by that I wish I would have done more to help, if I'd known he was going to relapse. Don't give up. Go see your daughter no matter way. It's never, ever too late, my friend!
He's so tried ..of feeling pain you can feel it for him sending you a BIG HUG from Toronto Canada 🇨🇦
Wow Adrien, sending you lots of healing energy. I hope you can listen to your body and get some healing soon. You’ve got an awesome energy, despite all you’ve gone through. I wish you peace.
Thank you for giving respect to those forgotten. He’s very genuine and introspective.
It could easily be me. I am able to keep my depression hidden by fitting into general society. That’s due to the resources at my disposal. Not everyone has that.
And that’s what your work does. Reminds us how easily it could be anyone and that we are all human.
It’s clear you didn’t do this for notoriety. You tapped into something special that connects us all as humans. ❤️
This is by far the most powerful interview ive seen and i watch you everyday mark
I feel for him. You can tell it's got a hold on him, when he started talking about it his demeanor completely changed
I hope he gets the help he needs. I hope this is your reminder, if you forgot, that there is a human behind each and every one of these stories. Sending love Adrian, your stronger than you know.
u never ceaze to amaze me anymore Mark, a great interview with Adrian, wish him peace and solumn
*cease
*Peace and Solace
What a real sweetie Adrian is. Funny, full of plenty of stories and also loves his kids and is aware of the situation he's got himself in. God I wish he could muster up the strength and courage to kick the fent. I hope he overcomes his cancer. Thanks Mark for another awesome vid. 🙏
This interview is one of the most touching. He is grateful and knows how to overcome, I hope he makes that choice. Wish him the best. Sending prayers for him. If you haven't used an outhouse, carried water to cook, clean and bathe with, then you should be more than grateful. I didn't know indoor plumbing until 6th grade. I didn't know we were poor until society told me I was. I was shocked to hear this happened in other parts. I grew up Appalachian and only thought that level of poverty existed in the Mtns.
I was born and raised in DDR (East Germany) before the wall came down. I had to smile when he talked about the younger kids always got the clean water in the tub. It was the complete opposite in my world. I was the youngest and got the old dirty water at the end.
This breaks my heart, may the universe provide healing for you Adrian.
Thanks Adrian. It got thru to me when you said it's never too late to change and find the place you are Meant to be - not the place you Want to be necessarily. I needed to hear that. Thank you Mark for a place to hear Adrian's story.
Very powerful. I wonder how many of us could live with the shame/pain that Adrian deals with. I salute you Adrian.
Adrian to hear u laugh at different experiences in life shows u still have what it takes to prosper in this thing called LIFE
These interviews humble me so much 🙏🏾
That's the point..... Use this information to keep you humble, grounded, kind and caring... Never forget how blessed you are, How much your Loved...
@@llamaArdiente most definitely
@@GnosticCushite thanks
Adrian, like you said, it's never too late. Dude, call your daughter. I promise she won't care about your drug use ,she just wants her dad. You need to take care of your health and get straight with your child. Take care of yourself ❤
The best interview with a guy on fentanyl he’s so prolific and a good speaker. Cool dude
One of the most powerful videos out there and in this channel it’s saying a lot.
Randolpho Francisco Castillo (December 18, 1950 - March 26, 2002)[2] was an American musician. He was Ozzy Osbourne's drummer during the mid-1980s to the early 1990s, and later as drummer for Mötley Crüe, from 1999 to his death in 2002.
Thanks for sharing that!
I don’t understand the relevance of this comment. Did I miss something?
@@AntiPlatitude you certainly did. Starts at 2:57
@@tmckenny2994 I thank you
Thank you very much for confirming this.
Adrian you said it yourself, “it’s never too late”! You have more life to life. Make the change. Run, don’t walk, to your daughter and your wife. I am praying for your healing, happiness & peace.
This interview was one of the best Mark. 🤍
That life gave me the same war wounds. My head looks like a F’n road map now that I’m bald. But it looks like his new one might be getting infected. He ain’t lying about fentanyl being waaaay harder to quit than heroin. Adrian, I hope you can get on your feet.
I wish you the best and I hope you make it brotha. From a dope fiend in NYC. Stay up!
Get off that fen shit mate stick around
How did you get off fetanyl?
@@sabrinachamberlain5150 by stopping.
The same way with any drug.
Resolve.
Utter pain with complete resolve.
Here in Chicago it’s not only fentanyl.
It’s also xylazine.
Tranq dope.
It’s literally killing us.
The usual go to’s like methadone and subs barely work.
The heroin supply is forever ruined.
Thanks to the war on drugs and greed.
It’s possible to stop.
It’s just been made even harder.
Evil.
8:28 "what did you....NO MOMMY!" followed with that laugh LOL that cracked me up...what a nice guy.
That made me laugh too
I remember one time In school I took a Xanax that had fent in it next thing I know my friends were telling me I was crawling in the hallways so messed up during passing period. Three years later I’ve had multiple seizures due to Xanax withdrawal, all separate times so I’ve had probably 6 seizures, 2 in front of my mom and one in front of my dad. Sober now though and lucky dodged jail time for the things I did on Xanax a year ago. Don’t do it. Take it from someone who doesn’t listen to anybody’s advice. Being only 18 I realize I might need help later.
You must have used a while with real benzos for a minute to get prolonged seizures I’m no doctor I could be wrong but if yu have em a lot
Xanax withdrawal is more dangerous than heroin withdrawal. Also there’s no Xanax version of Suboxon to help you through. Hope ur doing better now. A friend of mine had seizures and he also started turning yellow from his kidneys were starting to fail.
I’ve been prescribed Xanax for 6 years and use it responsibly as needed. I use a quarter of the recommended dose, when needed; rarely, not daily. If you use it responsibly it’s great for overwhelming stress or moments that can lead to panic attacks.
Thanks for sharing mate, please never abruptly stop Xanax “alprazolam” make sure if you ever relapse’ make sure you taper off it gradually & slowly so you’re body doesn’t get a shock… stopping any benzodiazepine suddenly can & will cause these seizures. So awesome you’re sober, we are Human & not perfect, we all make mistakes! Don’t ever blame yourself, it’s about intent at the end of the day… & being addicted to a substance doesn’t mean you have bad intent to hurt others, sad thing is you were hurting yourself, so many people are addicted, you’re not alone! I wish you all the best, love from a person from Australia :-)
God bless you for kicking the addiction. ❤️
Mark, Excellent work! God bless you, Adrian. You are aware that you are dying and your pain is being disconnected from your daughter. Call your daughter, Adrian! Let her know how much you love her before it is too late.
Wishing inner peace for you Adrian.
I love all the videos! Mark you have a with people that’s amazing. You speak very soft and genuine
These videos are truly a wake up call for me! It’s sad people make choices like this
This interview left me breathless
Another top notch interview Mark. Thank you for sharing your story Adrian. I hope you can beat the fentanyl demon. I wish you the best!
Mark you have a true natural ability to communicate with all kinds of people and pass absolutely no judgment, thank you for all your hard work & dedication to showing the World that everyone has a story… & for many life can be extremely tough, & growing up in a broken Home & Un healed trauma seems to be the root cause for mental illness & substance abuse…..
I myself am a chronic pain sufferer & have CPTSD- the most horrible form of PTSD you can have…So I am on prescription medication for pain & some serious anxiety. I was diagnosed with M.S at 18yo & other serious chronic illness, so i have had many years to research about substance being 35yo now, & in my case it’s “pharmaceuticals” which are basically legal illicit substance.
In my case i have never abused my medication & I don’t like being on meds’ but sadly in order to function I require it. Everyone has a story’ Life isn’t easy & I’m sure if I came from a “Broken home” I would probably abuse my medication & probably drink alcohol too… Watching these interviews makes me realise how truly blessed I am to have a beautiful home & family I absolutely adore.!
I’m fully aware Big Pharma is a BIG business! But we have to do what we have to do to survive. I feel so sorry for people hooked on illicit drugs that live rough, & on the streets as I lay in my warm big bed :-( these people are often treated less than animals & they must feel “invisible” lots don’t have families & have so much trauma that hasn’t healed, they have seemingly “fallen through the cracks in the broken system”. God bless these poor wounded souls…! They must feel absolutely lost in a cold world.
I never judge others, regardless of their situation, race, sexuality, mental stability & “social status” a soul is a soul- a homeless heroin addicts soul, or prostitute that’s hooked on meth is just as valuable & equal to a millionaire that lives in a mansion & drives a Lamborghini, when all Humans realise this’ the world would be a much better place. Blessings to all these beautiful lost souls, may they know they are valued & loved by many people who have big hearts & no judgment. Peace & Love from a Person from the land down under! :-)
Randy was a badass drummer. My friend Sarah used to have a big crush on him. Slash & Randy were 2 rockers she wanted to marry when we were in high school back in 92~96
Love Slash
Mark 🥇 you are just unbelievable. Thanks for giving us these life stories, learning so much from it ♥️
I wish these addictive drugs could just go away. Ugh heartbreaking man. He's a fighter and still has lots of life in him.
Adrian, I hope you get help find peace,love, and happiness. ❤️
As someone who knows the addiction struggles with opiates , being high and thinking about your kids … being ashamed of being High but needing to get high to not feel only to feel harder it’s so hard to explain. I consider myself lucky
Why doesnt anyone mention getting high because they're waking up sick in withdrawl every day? I wasted 20 years chasing withdrawls away.. in the beggining, at 19, I was trying to get high, within a few months I was trying not to be sick! Then 20 years went by doing the same thing everyday..
I wish he'd go to his daughter and tell her how he feels. 😓 So sad.
Praying for this man and all of the people that’s going through this Amen 🙏
The most important lesson he learnt in his life was great and well said
Adrian 🏆 you are more than you give yourself credit to be. AmAzing journey - keep going. A great fentanyl story- the best. Good vibes and Blessings and Healings 🙏🏻
Imagine how it would be if every person who decided to “make a statement”, and who also did everything “ten times” as extreme, chose a course of conduct to solve the problems of the world.
Prayers to this guy. Breaks my heart 😭
Can't help but cry with this guy and I don't even have a kid.
Oh man, my heart goes out. Listen to me Adrian, your daughter needs you. And you need her. Recovery from Fentanyl is possible. People are doing it everyday. The question you gotta ask yourself is, "How willing am I?" It's time to get honest and stay that way...
You should get repeat back on,such a fascinating guy to listen too,could listen to him all day
Your daughter loves you
Her love for you far surpasses your addiction
Call her let her know your love
I used a outhouse for several years in my earlier years. It was so cold in the heart of winter. At my granny’s she had a 2 seater outhouse and the grandkids were piling up so my dad and uncle built a 4 seater. We thought we was walking in high cotton now. It didn’t go all the way to the ground and that cold wind would come under the outhouse and right up the seat we were setting in. I wouldn’t trade them memories for this stinking world.
Adrian,
Use that emotion you're feeling when your thinking about your daughter to kick addiction in the ass. There is a higher power, God, who is ready to help you
Heart breaking interview.
It's amazing how he talks with so much passion and energy but nodding out a minute later 😮
I hope he finds the right path he speaks of
Real deal right here. I can tell..wow.. I can see he used to be Alot bigger/ heavier too.
Hope he can finally sometime soon?..
Find some Peace.. Godspeed man..
Never say die or quit trying to get ok.
Mark, you should really go to Albuquerque some day. There are so many interesting people here and I bet they have some amazing stories to tell. It’s an amazing city and there are people from all walks of life here!
Sending you love and light from your hometown of ABQ, Adrian 💞
The human conscience can break a man and some will never know the weight
Changing your attitude towards life is tough when you live in a "comfort zone" like Los Angeles. A guesstimated 20,000 more comfort zone seekers are expected to relocate to the L.A. area in 2022. Always interesting, thanks!
Yup…three meals a day…sometimes free housing…free showers, washroom, cell phones……hard to think how any of this helps since its clearly not helping. People don’t need free things….they need purpose…they should be made to work for things. They’d feel better about themselves….I’ve even read some idiot liberals want to give them free drugs and safe places to shoot up..absolutely insane.
That story about the cops murdering him and then ruling it the way they did….I had never thought about that before……but it makes all the sense in the world.
What is super sad is “fentanyl pills “is so common in my area we all carry narcan and when my dog tasted puke outside a bar before I could stop him..
as gross as it was 🤮I was more worried he ingested fentanyl. So much sadness!
Wow i never thought of how that could endanger dogs in that way. The fenty crisis in America is ridiculous. I'm shocked every time I go back at the number of urban zombies.
I hope he cleans up one day. He knows about our Creator and signs, which tells me he’s an intelligent man. Good interview 👍🏽
May God give your heart the peace that it needs Adrian. Hang in there. Sending you a big ass hug 🫂 ❤
The Burque is awful too, all of NM is really. You’d get some crazy interesting stories from ppl in New Mexico, Mark!!
I'm rooting for you Adrian.
The silence was deafening once he stopped speaking.
This was an amazing watch.
Ace,
I don't know if you'll ever read these comments but Kaylyn and I miss you so much. Please reach out to one of us. We love you and could get you the resources you need.
I love you,
Asia Marie
Hi babygirl....love you guys...I send my love to you all
@@arianphol7298 please message me, let's catch up and figure things out together.
Hey Uncle Ace, I love you and miss you. Feel free to reach out to me as well I would love to hear from you.
Thank you for sharing
him crying broke my heart
I knew his biggest fear would be something pertaining to death.. always these guys who are "killers", have no problem taking the lives of others but cant bear the thought of their own mortality.. i saw a vid where a death row inmate that killed his girlfriend and her young daughter was crying like a baby the day before execution.. these men are something else! Never heard of consequences, karma ?
You told it well adrian.. Good luck.
His uncle was in Ozzy. That’s awesome
Your daughter would rather hear from you and know you’re okay and love her, than nothing at all!
this is the first thing i’ve seen or heard of my dad in 5 years
I've never, ever known any instance where an adult forces a kid to smoke to teach a lesson and that kid doesn't end up smoking later in life...never. It does the exact opposite of teaching a lesson every time.
My dad showed me how to drink whiskey at 13 and now I’m an alcoholic with 14 mths sober thank God, yes parents need to protect their children
New Zealander here Kia Ora 🇳🇿
What about NZ
@@xeftones come for a visit 😆
@@itsjustme9354 I'm from Hamilton
🇳🇿
Hello from Brooklyn NY
Incredible story.
Broke my heart
I'm guesing he popped out at the 23:28 edit? Articulate, insightful guy. Wish him the best
What a coincidence - I'm from Albuquerque and my cousin is Randy Castillo. I'm just wondering if I'm related to this guy. 🤔
Sooooooo HEART~WRENCHING.
You can see the high kick in about halfway through the interview. Hopefully this guy finds to strength to kick that stuff for good.
It's not that it kicked in. Fentanyl hits right then and there. The video is cut because mark gave him a break and he used. Many of the addicts in these videos take breaks to use.
adrian keep your head up sending you positive vibes 🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾
Idk why the first exchange got me. Before he even explained the fight. It’s when he said he came to and he was “alone”. Fuck….
Whoever is Reading this you matter alot and you Can change whatever is bothering you
Thank you, you too.
It’s easier sad than done I’ve been STUCK for 4 years.
@@tyriexs5 me too, i cant function without medication, and its been 5 yrs, but i like to believe that its Never too late , and that there's Always an open door.....
“How did you get that bruise on your head?”
“I don’t know man.. I was fighting this dude.. next thing I know, I’m just sitting there at the park”
That’ll do it 😂
Look ,one of the reasons you can't quit is because in your wors you would use then quit. Use then quit. What happens is each time we use then quit. The next gets harder. Now if you want to quit you are going to have to work. And it will take a lot. I know I was where you are at my man. I was dope sick for a year. It came back.
Everything about him is really raw. I can't listen to the whole interview.