We Can't Answer This Question | Chosen Family Podcast

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  • Опубліковано 21 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 620

  • @veltii
    @veltii Рік тому +898

    Just wanna acknowledge to Mak that I’m still laughing at these twilight jokes

  • @beardlessdragon
    @beardlessdragon Рік тому +169

    "Your personality is not the things you struggle with." So many people probably need to hear this

  • @ryanflake3481
    @ryanflake3481 Рік тому +505

    It sucks to hearnthat Ashley's special didn't do the sort of numbers that she was hoping for. It was a fantastic special, from its production to its content. The inclusion of the 9/11 bits was *superbly* executed. Here is hoping that it hits a little later.

    • @dewimatthews
      @dewimatthews Рік тому +5

      I thought it was great, very skill fully executed.

    • @Grounded_Gravity
      @Grounded_Gravity Рік тому +9

      I know, it blows my mind that it didn't do better - it was so hilarious and excellent! Idk why people wouldn't watch it...

  • @itsponytime
    @itsponytime Рік тому +340

    I have to say this. We have lost a LOT of great comedians and sketch artists to the podcast genre over the years because the algorithm rewards podcasts over original and costly (time and money) content like sketches and standup shows, possibly because we're suffering a loneliness epidemic and all living in a parasocial nightmare. I watched the special and it was brilliant. Found Ashley's comedy through YT shorts, and then came to this podcast after all of that. Ashley's a brilliant comedian, and the special was better than many recent specials put out by big names. I hope the audience can sort their shit out, but also that Ashley doesn't take the lack of clicks through to the special personally, it's not a reflection of the content or the work, it's a reflection of the programming and zeitgeist.

    • @chelister27
      @chelister27 Рік тому +1

      Is liking podcasts bad

    • @saskia6648
      @saskia6648 Рік тому +8

      ⁠@@chelister27 no we're all here bc we like podcasts (or at least this one). I personally find it more interesting hearing people talk about their stories in a conversational way. I still like stand up but it's harder for it to hold my attention for a long period of time

    • @popsikle1132
      @popsikle1132 Рік тому +3

      Also want to add that it was probably more about COVID than the podcasts. Podcasts were just what was available while people couldn’t go to stand up shows. Plus a lot of venues had to close.

    • @itsponytime
      @itsponytime Рік тому

      @@popsikle1132 It's a phenomenon that existed very much before covid. H3H3 for instance, did brilliant sketches and transitioned to podcasts only because the ROI was better and the effort was lower. It's just a more rewarding format for a variety of reasons, but we're losing other art because of it.

    • @Michael-kp4bd
      @Michael-kp4bd Рік тому +1

      @@itsponytimeIt’s one of those things where there’s a lot factors and multiple motivations/incentives. I think everyone here has made a very good point. I’ll just add that on top of ROI and the need for socialization substitute due to all the factors of Covid, a lot of creators pivoted to (or simply just ADDED) podcasts for their efforts because not only because of demand, but also for some wholesome reasons! For instance, it’s fun to collaborate and interview and get “behind the scenes” looks into all sorts of other creators. It also often turns some creators from a lone worker into someone with an awesome, big, successful team.
      H3 Podcast is kind of a good example because it certainly had way higher up front costs to get going. It wasn’t “sketches are expensive and hard, pod will be easier” .. much likely the opposite, on that front at least. And now Ethan & Hila aren’t all that people come for - every member of the staff/“cast” have become fan favorites for different people, and so many are invested in the “lore” that has come out of the long-running, growing podcast.
      I don’t want the internet to become podcast-world though, we’ve GOT to show up and appreciate the really creative works that people pour their souls into. So we should try overcome the laziness of only tuning into pods. Some of them, like this one this are just so fcking good though 😅
      Everyone - WATCH ASHLEY’s SPECIAL!! lol

  • @potato2337
    @potato2337 Рік тому +166

    Alayna saying she felt like the anxiety was such a big part of her and she asked herself what would be left of her if that’s gone reminded me of her fear of coming out as gay.
    Her bisexuality was such a big part of her. She was literally engaged with a man. But she still made the change and found herself to be more of herself than ever before. I believe the same is going to happen with treating the anxiety.

    • @mariannetfinches
      @mariannetfinches Рік тому +5

      But God help her if she ever gets bored of rock climbing 😜

  • @187942
    @187942 Рік тому +133

    Mak you’re getting so much better at expressing yourself

    • @187942
      @187942 Рік тому +3

      Love you

    • @187942
      @187942 Рік тому +8

      “I didn’t even mean to do that right there” 😂 but seriously you’ve been expressing your thoughts and feelings so well throughout this whole episode

  • @rubyblindheim4572
    @rubyblindheim4572 Рік тому +43

    "Hey son"
    "Hi Dad"
    "I'm proud of you"
    "Thank you"
    I LOVE THIS PODCAST SO MUCH! THAT WAS SO CUTE! AHHHHH!

  • @Elizabeth-qh9lp
    @Elizabeth-qh9lp Рік тому +107

    Ashley's fans who haven't watched her special are truly missing out. I watch a lot of stand-up and was so impressed with her act. Truly one of the best stand-up specials out there.

  • @annemanalisay543
    @annemanalisay543 Рік тому +51

    The moment Alayna disconnects and Ashley jumps immediately to dad mode 😂

  • @kenziewenzieasmr9800
    @kenziewenzieasmr9800 Рік тому +91

    I totally relate to what Alayna said about anxiety-the “oh it’s not that bad “ mentality. When you have chronic anything- and you’ve been dealing with it for so long it becomes your normal. When I was diagnosed with panic disorder I couldn’t believe it. But everyone around me was like “that checks out”

    • @mariannetfinches
      @mariannetfinches Рік тому +3

      Oh man, IKR! Every now & then I say something I assume is relatable about "you know when you have to stop breathing for a bit because of the searing pain", & folks look at me like "No. Normal people do not know what that's like" 😅😅

    • @kenziewenzieasmr9800
      @kenziewenzieasmr9800 Рік тому +7

      @@mariannetfinches it definitely sucks but it’s a hard truth. We get used to suffering and minimize our own (I think due to social pressures) experiences

  • @beardlessdragon
    @beardlessdragon Рік тому +54

    I'm so sad to hear about Ashley's special not hitting the numbers she wanted because it is FANTASTIC. Best comedy special I've seen and it's not even a contest. As a fellow creative (though not professionally yet), I know how much this stuff means and I can't imagine the frustration of advertising it SO much just to have so many fans not watch. That is really rough. I hope your break goes well, Ashley! You are brilliant and will continue to do brilliant things

  • @kennyjac
    @kennyjac Рік тому +58

    The fact that they talked about Hank this week of all weeks 💙

    • @MossyBear
      @MossyBear Рік тому +1

      I was also thinking this 😭

    • @jamesfv1
      @jamesfv1 Рік тому

      Hank is incredible

  • @StargazingDragon
    @StargazingDragon Рік тому +34

    I'm a broke cancer survivor single parent. I can't even afford rent or therapy right now girl. I'm watching your videos constantly though so put more ads on!

    • @philhatch483
      @philhatch483 Рік тому +2

    • @jamesfv1
      @jamesfv1 Рік тому +2

      I wish I could afford to live properly, that would be really nice (as a fellow sick single parent)

  • @FridayRosesTwitch
    @FridayRosesTwitch Рік тому +28

    Mak saying boobies is literally what me and my partner do. We say 'life hard titties soft' at each other when just lying on each others boobs (and on other occasions)

  • @kerizella
    @kerizella Рік тому +61

    For what it's worth, I've finally become a patron of the podcast! I'm at a place where I financially can do so, and was very moved by your discussion of the life changing events in your life/risks you're taking to be happier/struggles with sponsors. You are creators, artists, and have brought me so much peace and fulfillment in my queer journey. You deserve the support of a strong community. Happy to have become part of it ❤

  • @makenzieorozco2789
    @makenzieorozco2789 Рік тому +16

    I’m not gonna lie, I really loved Ashley’s Patron rant 😂 she got me. One less Starbucks and I’m signing up lol

  • @a.o.9839
    @a.o.9839 Рік тому +47

    14:00 Ashley thank you for the special, it truely was great! I live in Spain and was grateful to be able to see the show online :)

    • @Andy-ru2eb
      @Andy-ru2eb Рік тому +4

      Same here! Another Spanish listener that had an amazing time watching the special. So thank you Ashley! ❤

  • @themorales6
    @themorales6 Рік тому +3

    “Danny, roll the clip.” Mak, well done with the insights for Alayna! 👏

  • @xSilverxshadowx
    @xSilverxshadowx Рік тому +35

    "It made me really sad that so many of my audience that want to come see me live are not interested in the art that I made for them for free" Ashley, I have dealt with these exact same feelings. It's a particularly painful kind of rejection to offer something freely that you worked so hard on and for people to not even take the time to look at it. It really stings. You're offering it for free, so the reward you're seeking is validation, it's people's enjoyment of it, and to not get even that, it's like "what did I work so hard on this for? what was it all for?" These things are so hard to predict, as well. I'll work really hard on something that I think is exactly what people want and will get huge numbers...and it performs poorly. And then I'll churn something out that I'm only mildly excited about and it blows up. You just have to keep doing what you're doing, focus on you, focus on what makes you passionate, because the audience's approval is a constantly moving target. And if you base your art or your self worth around that, you will never be happy. I'm so glad you're taking a break! Breaks are so integral to being an artist. I'm sure you'll come back with tons of amazing ideas!

  • @emma_ruth_design
    @emma_ruth_design Рік тому +130

    I'm 17 and i just got broken up with by my best friend and boyfriend of almost 2 years and this podcast has been such a huge help in getting through this.... basically just convincing myself it's a good thing since i can date a girl now whoops. (I'm bi)

    • @Zweigenhaft9
      @Zweigenhaft9 Рік тому +11

      That feels like a fucking eternity at that age but it's really just a blink of the eye.
      Teenage relationships don't work out for a reason.
      You grow into your own too much to stay stuck in the same emotional space you were in when you were still a literal child.

    • @theembersinside1420
      @theembersinside1420 Рік тому +19

      I feel like saying "you'll realize how silly this is when ur older" or something is kinda patronizing. What u go through in life doesn't depend on what age u are. Troubles are a lifetime thing & it doesn't make it easier to hear that stuff. Ur going thru it right now & its painful. To invalidate what ur going thru by saying something patronizing doesn't help anyone. Pain doesn't discriminate. I know ppl mean well, but just validating someone's feelings/experiences can do the most help. I'm glad u have the wisdom at 17 to know u have great options ahead & know yourself enough to know ur sexuality. I wish u all the best! ☮️

    • @williambriggs7037
      @williambriggs7037 Рік тому +5

      I feel you there. Honestly just know that you're doing the right thing and that it's better in the long run. But also just accept that it feels fucking awful. There is this illusion that breaking up with someone is painless whilst being broken up with is awful. I'd argue that they're both just as bad, but for me personally breaking up with someone and watching their love for you desperately try to hold on and process it is heartbreaking, and usually renders me almost useless for a couple of days

  • @faeriesandrainbows
    @faeriesandrainbows Рік тому +40

    Anyone else been watching/playing Ashley's special on repeat since it came out? 🙋‍♀️

  • @makenzieorozco2789
    @makenzieorozco2789 Рік тому +9

    “Your personality is not the things you struggle with!” Freaking love that.

  • @nathanmoranx2105
    @nathanmoranx2105 Рік тому +49

    I want Ashley to know I watched the special and I loved it! I even listened to it a second time while falling asleep as I find Ashley's voice so soothing. Of course 9/11 was mentioned! 🤣😁

    • @williambriggs7037
      @williambriggs7037 Рік тому +3

      Now I know I'm not the only one chaotic enough to go to sleep to comedy specials 😂

  • @JuMixBoox
    @JuMixBoox Рік тому +13

    I felt bad when Ashley was screaming at me until I remembered that I very much have notifications on.

  • @christinaherring9762
    @christinaherring9762 Рік тому +12

    Im disabled and have no income at this time, but I'm still a patron! I love my chosen family ❤

  • @MITCHELLE198
    @MITCHELLE198 Рік тому +35

    Ashley I’m so sorry you’re feeling the way you are regarding your special. I have been watching it daily and will continue to have it on in the morning when I’m getting ready. Not only for views for you but also because it just brightens my day 😊😊😊 thank you for it. Just know that although it didn’t reach expectations for you YET (it may get bigger with time) it has made a fuck ton of people laugh. Wish I could give you a hug xx

  • @airhead771
    @airhead771 Рік тому +13

    This might be an unpopular opinion but I wish Ashley would just make stuff she wants to make without the expectations of it going viral. I can see how putting so much work into making something great and then feeling like it didn't perform well would be discouraging. But on the flip side, it's getting uncomfortable constantly hearing about how well the special is or isn't doing. Making things solely for the numbers is a lose/lose for ashley not seeing the success she wants and for those of us who have been doing our part. I've listened to evey podcast episode (this one and the other one), I'm a patreon subscriber, and I've streamed the special countless times but I still tune in to hear that it's not enough. Obviously I want all three of these folks to be successful and continue putting out content they love to make but I wish it wasn't just about the numbers.

  • @andieheim
    @andieheim Рік тому +8

    I hear this same dilemma in the visual arts culture, too. The more proud of the painting that the painter is, the less popular it is among the public. And the less creative piece that has hardly any personal touch to it, people go crazy over.
    The public isn't always educated enough to "get" the art of an artist.

  • @em-yx5pl
    @em-yx5pl Рік тому +12

    mak im so happy that you’re making your tiktok a comfortable place where you can just be yourself, I feel like your audience will also finally filter and you’ll have people who care about your content not just the thirst traps!

  • @mrc2205
    @mrc2205 Рік тому +15

    Alayna. Meds changed my life. I fought so long against having them. But I couldn’t believe how great I felt after being on them for even a short time. I could start to live more normal.

    • @BrunetteBby13
      @BrunetteBby13 Рік тому +2

      Yes!! I was so scared of not being “me” but when I got on the right anxiety med I still felt like me, but so much more awake and confident for the first time. I was able to go off them too but they really helped when I needed them most.

  • @hipeeps1000
    @hipeeps1000 Рік тому +4

    It hurts my heart that Ashley's special didn't do well when my friend and I got so excited and had a whole little party to celebrate and watch it together 🥺🥺

  • @moony788
    @moony788 Рік тому +6

    Alayna' fear that the meds are going to change who she is really reminds me of how I felt before starting ADHD meds. I felt the exact same things. But now I can say that I understand that the things that were making my life soo hard weren't, in fact, a part of me that I need to have in order to be myself. I actually feel so much better now, and tbh, I feel a lot more like myself

  • @michael_the.girl.
    @michael_the.girl. Рік тому +1

    "Your personality is not the things that you struggle with" - The Great Wise Mak 😂 oooofffff, soooo goood!

  • @orthenight
    @orthenight Рік тому +9

    Hey Ashley,
    1. Feeling disappointed in the numbers on your special is totally relatable to anyone who has created art!! Your business concerns are completely legitimate normal concerns to any small business owner.
    2. I’m not on tiktok, I hate tiktok, I hate short form content. I found y’all through UA-cam and I absolutely adored your special. I thought it was so brilliant. I think maybe the tiktok audience is just not translating because they don’t want to consume long form content. I think you have so much room to grow outside of tiktok and this podcast is a huge part of it. ♥️♥️♥️

  • @roxy4325
    @roxy4325 Рік тому +8

    Bro, I won't lie, Ashley yelling at me to do things always makes me NOT want to do them. I've watched the special and once the berating started I was like, how do I take away my view. And also, yes, this content is free, but if it wasn't, even FEWER people would watch. I certainly wouldn't, can't afford to be keeping everyone else's lights on and not my own. And I know it's a bit but my gosh.

  • @lioneification
    @lioneification Рік тому +21

    I guess I'm in the minority because I this pod and everyone's content through Ashley's special. As someone who is a standup fan, I really enjoy the rest of your guy's videos. Just finished and got caught up on the pod in a week.

    • @SpaceyD
      @SpaceyD Рік тому +1

      Welcome to the Chosen Family! 🌈💖

  • @eyeseajujubee
    @eyeseajujubee Рік тому +10

    I really appreciate Alayna talking about going on meds for anxiety and being scared about it. I’ve been too nervous about taking meds to start anxiety meds for months now. Thanks for helping me feel less alone. I also relate to not knowing what life is like without the anxiety.

    • @mariannetfinches
      @mariannetfinches Рік тому +1

      I was terrified that treating my depression would make me a terrible person because I'd no longer hate myself enough to put the effort into helping others.
      Turns out being less anxious/depressed gives you more time & energy to do what you love & be a great friend/partner

  • @chrisoneill325
    @chrisoneill325 Рік тому +4

    "Daddy has to tour or the whole thing falls apart, but daddy's falling apart from the touring." It truly sucks sometimes, I'm sorry.
    For what it's worth, I watched the special when it premiered. It was awesome! It's shitty that it didn't do the numbers it should have. Hell, when I finish the podcast, I'm gonna watch it again.
    And whenever you do make it back to NJ, I promise to come see your show.

  • @kassidyreece3072
    @kassidyreece3072 Рік тому +3

    I want “Your personality isn’t what you’re struggling with” merch IMMEDIATELY

  • @anniefishbein4758
    @anniefishbein4758 Рік тому +6

    I watched the special when it premiered on UA-cam, and I got my friends to watch it with me again after. Everyone I have shown it to thought it was great! It deserves to be seen more! Once you start the special, you won’t want to stop! The production value is incredible, and Ashley’s set is well constructed. Mad respect to you, Ashley! I can see how much work you put into creating your special. The set was hilarious in person and captured wonderfully in the UA-cam special. It’s a must-see! If anyone seeing this comment hasn’t watched the special yet, please give it a watch 💛

  • @morelikekoolva
    @morelikekoolva Рік тому +2

    "DAD HAS HAD A LONG THREE YEARS AT WORK!" I love the common thread of changes you all are experiencing right now and hearing how you all are navigating and supporting each other through it. Thank you!

  • @kaylynrenee98
    @kaylynrenee98 Рік тому +7

    The special was incredible Ashley. I stayed up on a work night to watch it live, then rewatched it again a few days later. It’s hilarious, the quality is incredible. But I can definitely understand the feeling of not meeting your own expectations. Esp if there’s so much pressure around it, bc it’s apart of this important journey you’re on, of figuring out how to balance everything. You’re doing amazing, I’m so proud of you, you’re the perfect cocktail of vulnerability, and comedic relief that is so deeply appreciated. 11:25

    • @ashgavs
      @ashgavs Рік тому +1

      thank you so much

  • @smaug2396
    @smaug2396 Рік тому +6

    This genuine friendship captured in podcast form is so refreshing and energizing. In a funny and deep way.

  • @rainyrin
    @rainyrin Рік тому +10

    Before I went on medication for my social anxiety I couldnt tell that it was debilitating, but now that ive been on it for a few months I look back and go "oh wow, yea that was infact crippling my ability to function in society." Things that used to seem like a big deal just don't anymore and it's really nice. I know everyone has their own experience with medication and I really hope its able to help alayna in the way that it has helped me. Sending love to my chosen family

  • @kirsty916
    @kirsty916 Рік тому +1

    The moment I realised I had high-functioning anxiety was when a colleague got really hurt while using a piece of machinery. Literally everyone else started freaking out and panicking and I was the only calm one. Turns out, when you live in a perpetual state of anxiety and stress, you can actually handle extreme situations pretty well because you're just expecting them all the time. My doctor put me on a combo of anti-depressants and beta-blockers and I have levelled out so much in about a year, it's incredible.
    Also, Ashley - fucking loved your special. Please come to the UK sometime! And I've just joined your Patreon, because you guys are my safe space and there's a lot of people who need you here 🥰

  • @cariiinen
    @cariiinen Рік тому +1

    To anyone who is apprehensive of going on medication for their mental health: getting my anxiety under control thanks to meds made me feel like myself again.
    As they mentioned in this episode, we get used to things like this, but once I felt better, I finally realised how bad things had been, and how good it is to be able to just breathe and relax again.
    Thank you Alayna for sharing. Wishing you and everyone who needs it all the best

  • @jclark1693
    @jclark1693 Рік тому +1

    The lighting in Ashley’s office makin’ her look like some kinda angry lesbian angel.

  • @Lion-ik6lv
    @Lion-ik6lv Рік тому +7

    It took me 31 weeks to finally laugh at Ashley calling us "a piece of s***". I'm happy now.

  • @tiesthatbind5056
    @tiesthatbind5056 Рік тому +4

    The amount of self growth on this epidosde alone is super inspiring and made me cry more than a couple times😭🙌🏽

  • @brrrrrrrrit2663
    @brrrrrrrrit2663 Рік тому +5

    I gotta say, Ashley’s special made me and my partner snort laughing. Also, Ashley’s hair is 10/10 in this pod. Keep going, y’all!

  • @kurenno477
    @kurenno477 Рік тому +23

    @Ashley - you’re really talented. Please trust that you resting means you will have more juice to give, and that’s what we your audience enjoys. And, a little scarcity creates demand. Looking forward to what you do when you come back. And, I watched the special twice.
    @Mak - you can make a thirst trap fully suited with just a raise of your eyebrow. And as you grow and change, remember, your audience is also growing and changing. You can bring new content. The audience will evolve with you.
    @Alayna - you make awesome content in large part because YOU are awesome. You can make whatever content YOU are interested in, and the audience will arrive. And some of your audience would love content bringing in what you are learning in school, if that’s what you want to make content about.
    @ChosenFamily - each of you and the three of you together are making really important content, and are enriching the diaspora of queer culture with your intelligence, wit and heart.
    Thank you, you all are awesome, truly.

  • @priskr21
    @priskr21 Рік тому +2

    I love the "hey son" "hey dad" moment at 5:26 🥺❤️

  • @kruelfoolie
    @kruelfoolie Рік тому +26

    this episode was honestly so hilarious but also so motivational like wow 😂

  • @alvaeriksson5468
    @alvaeriksson5468 Рік тому +3

    I find that if you put off time, like an hour or two a week, where you do something where you don't need to use your head (avoid reading, watching, listening to some sort of media), and you set an alarm or something else external to tell you when the 'hour' is up, that does a lot to help you disconnect from work. When you're not (and this is just my own experience) trying to think about something in your private life (in the sense of trying to solve it or understand it, or remember it) it is also easier to avoid starting to think about something in your work life.

  • @laurenbarber8579
    @laurenbarber8579 Рік тому +6

    Okay dad your yelling was effective on my deaf ears and I finally became a patreon member, thank u for teaching me how to properly support! Love you guys!!!

  • @kiracurtis8167
    @kiracurtis8167 Рік тому +10

    I've watched Ashley's special twice and I plan to watch it again. I recommend it to everyone. It's so excellent and brilliant! Thank you for providing such art for free ❤️

  • @immapinent7723
    @immapinent7723 Рік тому +6

    Proud of you guys for presenting the podcast right away this time😂

  • @brittanygoodrich9392
    @brittanygoodrich9392 Рік тому +6

    Ashley, I absolutely LOVED your special! I can't even imagine how discouraging it must be to do all that work and be ignored. No matter what you do next, I'm excited for it. And watch the special, guys!

  • @TadiSigaukereacts
    @TadiSigaukereacts Рік тому +1

    Literally listen to the podcast when I eat,shower,clean,going to work,at night in bed when I can't sleep. Y'all are amazing

  • @ComplexHormones
    @ComplexHormones Рік тому +1

    Even though Ashleys special wasn’t as viral as she hoped, I hope she’s really proud of what she made. As a queer person in a rural community it meant a lot to get to see a full show of hers.

    • @ashgavs
      @ashgavs Рік тому

      I am! Thank you so much

  • @MollyVSmurl
    @MollyVSmurl Рік тому +14

    I completely sympathize with Alayna and the chronic anxiety she feels. I was telling my wife that specifically when I go to bed every single night I have to watch cartoons or I have this intense feeling of doom in my chest.
    Especially after letting go of negative family members and having guilt about self care in regards to protecting my own mental and emotional health but also guilt if they ever died after I cut them off. Self care for mental health isn’t easy but it’s worth it because as a whole I feel so much better. Yay for therapy and positive / supportive people still in my life 🎉🎉

  • @piperrobb2346
    @piperrobb2346 Рік тому +4

    Ashley, it’s so sad to hear people didn’t watch the special! I watched it live and it was incredible! It’s completely understandable that you feel a little burned from the experience. Don’t forget you do have fans that care and wish the best for you!

  • @tjwithersauthor
    @tjwithersauthor Рік тому +7

    I definitely need Dad to take more days off so he (she) yells at me less 😭♥️🌻

  • @aliviafletcher8926
    @aliviafletcher8926 Рік тому +4

    These conversations are so important and very much appreciated. Love and support you all❤
    Even dad when she yells at us😭😭

  • @mrfredbasset
    @mrfredbasset Рік тому +3

    I had crippling anxiety (with my ocd), and it got to the point where I could hardly sleep, eating was an issue and my thoughts and feeling really just took up so much time and real estate in my mind that's all I would focus on.
    I was reluctant to use medication, because I thought that I didn't want to become reliant on them and stop being able to actually handle these emotions but it's honestly the best thing I could have done. Once I found the one that worked for me I have never looked back.
    I pop that little white sucker in with my breakfast and go about my day, maybe have a stressful thought or two during the day but I can get over it quickly and move on. It's not a miracle cure, you still need to take the steps and work on reducing the anxiety and stress but for me, it just helps to take that edge off which allows the other things to help

  • @Grounded_Gravity
    @Grounded_Gravity Рік тому +2

    I was basically on meds (well, pharmaceutical grade GABA recommended by a medical provider) for quite a while and it gave me sooo much relief that I sorely needed. Later some friends with a neurofeedback business gave me neurofeedback for cheap, and I was able to get off of it. I can say that dialing down the volume has given me more space to do some of the deeper work on my anxiety too. It's hard to do that when you're constantly in panic mode.

  • @faythshelby7060
    @faythshelby7060 Рік тому +2

    Just wanted to say that I really relate to the struggles with anxiety that Alayna has been expressing in these videos. Her vulnerability has been a huge motivator for me to start making my own progress towards caring for my mental health.

  • @naofg
    @naofg Рік тому +3

    You have no idea how much this podcast helps people. Now I always start my Thursdays listening to the new episode, and it makes me reflect on my own life while I listen to you guys talk about yours.
    I relate to Ashley when she says that going on tour is necessary but doing it so much is taking a toll on her mental health. Last year I had a burn out halfway through the year after a semester of extreme productivity. I'm self employed too, and after that I started to slow down and take less work, and now I'm in big financial trouble, but can barely keep up with the smaller amount of work I've got. I need to work more to pay the bills, but I can't work more because of my mental health, so the financial problems make me feel worse. Being an adult is freaking hard.

  • @pastellewitch
    @pastellewitch Рік тому +2

    On Meds: obviously it's different for everyone but going on my SSRI has been one of the best decisions of my life and I wish I had done it sooner. And in my case my drive as increased because i'm less *stressed* all the time. We did start very slow because of my other health issues I am extra sensitive to side effects and I was (and remain) in constant dialogue with my NP, had clear parameter for what is "normal" and what to "look out for". I also track my symptoms and could see the difference on paper. At worst it's not a good fit and you move on. But Mak is right, you are no just "anxiety"/what you struggle with, if it all goes well, you will be amazed by who you rediscover.

  • @kenziebelak1167
    @kenziebelak1167 Рік тому

    Advice on mentally disconnecting from work that was given to me and has helped SO MUCH: "I am not being paid to think about this right now." There is only so much I can do as one employee, and I'm not the make or break for any given problem or solution. (This also works for non-work related problems; reminding yourself that you're not being paid to think about it can be super liberating from undue stress.)

  • @abigailciske169
    @abigailciske169 Рік тому +1

    If Ashley ever sees this, I am also one of those people that only became interested in stand up because of you. You were one of the first comedians who I felt like I could relate to and you do it in such a way that people can tell you love what you do and you make the audience feel so included, even when the audience is through a screen. I absolutely loved watching your special because ever since I saw your content I have wanted to see a show in person, but I am not 18 yet. So getting to see a full show was something I didn't think would happen without seeing you live and I really truly appreciate all of the work you put into your content and your fans. Your dedication doesn't go unnoticed and we care about you just as much as your content, so please do whatever you need to do in order to feel good and don't feel guilty about taking care of yourself.

  • @kittyinacloud8101
    @kittyinacloud8101 Рік тому +11

    Mak's skin is *glowing*

  • @VinettaVenture
    @VinettaVenture Рік тому +4

    One, I have my first therapy appointment tonight and listening you guys talk about therapy and anxiety is so helpful for me! (And I’m sure so many others) hearing you guys talk about it helps me verbalize my own stuffs.
    Second, you guys are my favorite thing about Wednesdays! I wake up ever Wednesday and immediately can’t wait until I get to watch the new episode. So thank you guys for being truly amazing!

  • @soph7812
    @soph7812 Рік тому

    I just wanted to say Mak’s comment about how your struggles are not your personality was so helpful. I was worried taking medication for PMDD would affect my happiness, but that comment really helped me make that decision for my mental health.

  • @mwernli2886
    @mwernli2886 Рік тому +1

    37:44 The moment when Ashley‘s just had it.
    Alayna and Mak just doing the 😳.

  • @mileswilson6204
    @mileswilson6204 Рік тому +9

    I LOVED the special, it was great and it would be a shame to lose the opportunity for more. Ash you are on the right track with that idea, and even to get a conversion rate of 10% is fantastic! The challenge is to turn that into reliable income - a challenge that is constantly shifting. As a filmmaker and someone who believes in the power of free, I hope you find a way to make it work, because I need to know it's possible :)

    • @yayforfood100
      @yayforfood100 Рік тому +4

      was gonna say, is the 2 million number from TikTok? 20% conversation rate from short form tiktoks to a Hour Long UA-cam video, especially with the homophobic algorithm, is absolutely INCREDIBLE. I know Ash obsesses over her numbers, so maybe she knows something we don't, but still it's honestly amazing. sure, the straight comedians with production companies get multi-million views on their specials, but this is her first one and it's self produced and, again, homophobic algorithm. I think that given the circumstances 500k views is pretty fucking good.

  • @SouthernBell86
    @SouthernBell86 Рік тому

    Ashley's special was truly S tier! Everyone should stop what they are doing and watch it right now! I discovered her through her shorts and made sure to watch the special within 24 hours of it dropping. I'm one of her straight autistic fans that there are apparently so many of. 😅 I'm so sad that she was disappointed with the initial reception, but at least she recognizes that it isn't about her talent or the quality of the special.

  • @whatnowwithkayden
    @whatnowwithkayden Рік тому +3

    As someone feeling very overworked rn I needed to hear this

  • @themorales6
    @themorales6 Рік тому +3

    Damn, Ashley. I’m so sad to hear that about the special. I watched it multiple times, because I shared it with family members. I even just played it on mute when it premiered because I was busy doing something else that night. I’m surprised more of your fans didn’t take the time. I’m a Patreon (of WHGS😬). Glad to hear you’re going to take a little break this summer.❤

  • @belli9281
    @belli9281 Рік тому +1

    this might seem a bit wierd but ashley is such a safe space for me. Especially now where im going through a breakup. I see myself a lot in her but she feels like a more upbeat, fun version of me. Its just comforting to see her - she isnt extremely judgemental, shes honest and its comforting even when she opens up about her struggles because i love seeing her overcome them and say shes trying to get better. This isnt particular to the episode btw - i just randomly felt that way just now

  • @MossyBear
    @MossyBear Рік тому +2

    It's gut-wrenching to know Ashley's special underperformed. It's literally amazing and I've seen it multiple times 😭

  • @emjoy36
    @emjoy36 Рік тому +1

    24:26 THIS!!!! Nothing brings me more joy than being of service, and making positive differences 🥰

  • @WarmSnickerdoodle
    @WarmSnickerdoodle Рік тому +1

    When Mak said breaking dawn part 2 I had just stood up and almost fell laughing too hard.
    This pod is the perfect mix of gay, mental illness awareness and twilight references

  • @AReluctantSeamstress
    @AReluctantSeamstress Рік тому +2

    I had Ashley pop upon UA-cam in my shorts, and I bought a ticket to a show before I saw the special. Now I can’t wait to see the show! I know for me, I had to be in a place (and space) that I could watch it instead of having it on while I do something else.

  • @RowanWolf22
    @RowanWolf22 Рік тому +2

    It makes me so sad to hear your special didn’t do as well as you wanted; I personally absolutely loved it, it gave me SUCH a good laugh and I shared it with friends who also enjoyed it! Since none of us are from the states, we mostly get all of this incredible humour via your UA-cam and shorts!

    • @RowanWolf22
      @RowanWolf22 Рік тому

      (Also I would have PAID for that special, it was SO good!)

  • @meelane
    @meelane Рік тому +2

    i LOVE how Mak jokes about putting a trigger warning for the yelling but there isn't one. I don't want to be yelled at. it's never 'thank you for telling all your friends to watch' or 'thank you for telling people about Ashley's shows' it's always 'this isn't enough you aren't enough you aren't doing enough' well sucks to suck but if i wanted to be treated like that i could hang out with my mom. bye

  • @renee.c.seymour
    @renee.c.seymour Рік тому +2

    I as a youtube watcher of podcasts I have all of my podcasts notify me when another is posted and watch them all the way through and like

  • @hunterpowers2568
    @hunterpowers2568 Рік тому +3

    Y’all now have released enough episodes so that someone could watch one every day for any month😄awesome!!!(imo)

  • @hailey0917
    @hailey0917 Рік тому +3

    Honestly. This conversation was my favorite that I’ve listen to so far. Alayna.. you talking about your anxiety 😮‍💨 dang. That really hit home for me. Ashley is really making decisions to do what’s best for her. Mak’s honoring her feelings and being true to herself no matter how hard. Guys. Honestly. Best one yet! ❤️

  • @muustyx
    @muustyx Рік тому +1

    "UA-cam people, you let it come up on your feed," well, to be fair, I log into UA-cam every Monday and Wednesday knowing I'm about to have a great time, and every single time without exception, it's the very first recommendation that shows up, because they KNOW. That's basically the only thing I watch nowadays!

  • @ninin11
    @ninin11 Рік тому

    dude i’m my mental health ✨journey✨ the hardest decision i had to make was go on medication, which is ABSURD because homie was UNWELL. i used to have just general anxiety from the moment i woke up like alayna and had panic attacks, and the anxiety medication CHANGED MY LIFE and now i’m just less fucked up lol. medication doesn’t change your essence, it just allows it to flourish without stupid obstructions. and if you have issues with side effects you don’t have to live with that OBVIOUSLY. talk to your doctor, you’ll find the right medication and dosage for you together. wish everyone the best!

  • @starsgirly9139
    @starsgirly9139 Рік тому +4

    Aw, you guys are doing such good things! Sending lots of love!

  • @rheron3312
    @rheron3312 Рік тому +2

    I love it when ashley goes all reverse joe rogan on us 😂

  • @gracelarmee
    @gracelarmee Рік тому

    I've properly watched Ashley's special three times and played it in the background on devices several more times than that. It breaks my heart that it hasn't gone as viral as she wanted it to. It's so difficult when you put so much time, money, effort, love, etc. into something just for it to end up letting you down. Ashley I just want to tell you that your special is fantastic and honestly my favorite comedy special I've ever seen and despite it not working out the way you hoped, you should still be immensely proud of yourself for the sheer quality and hilarity of the special. Also most of the people mindlessly scrolling on tiktok/youtube shorts just want a bunch of short videos to quickly occupy their time and attention span. I think it's less an issue of people purposely choosing not to watch your special and more that your shorter videos are popping up in their feeds while they're scrolling through short clips and they won't be in the mood for a longer thing to watch in that moment. Then later, when they are looking for a movie length thing to watch, they often turn to movies and tv shows instead of thinking to turn to youtube. Basically this is just a long rant to say that I think you're loved and supported more than you know and the views on the special will slowly increase as people find time to sit down and watch it.

  • @TheErinbish
    @TheErinbish Рік тому +2

    I watched Ashley's special live, and saw her in Seattle. I wish she would get more support!

  • @atate43
    @atate43 Рік тому

    Things that help me disconnect from work (I work in mental health and am a part time therapist) - changing clothes when transitioning from work to home, a hygiene thing (ex. showering, brushing teeth, washing face), having a specific song/artist/podcast to listen to on the drive home to decompress, have a routine when you get home that you always do (ex. I greet my cat, set my stuff down, and check my plants), doing yoga when my brain needs to chill, have a snack with the intention of being 100% done thinking about work by the end of the snack. Other random things that can help are to have a physical/digital list where if something about work pops into your head on personal time you write it on the list and then when you get to work you have the list (this helps take the cognitive load of worrying about forgetting the thing off your brain because it’s on the list)

  • @myaparker1555
    @myaparker1555 Рік тому

    Ashley…thank you for sharing so much of your life and heart. Just also wanted to mention that when people see your clips/shorts, they’re probably thoroughly enjoying it and then scrolling on to the next video. I really don’t think it’s about your work because people want to attend your shows…I think it’s the addiction to scrolling mindlessly. I’m glad you’re taking time for yourself…you beyond deserve it ❤️

  • @Sara.a.v.Dahlberg
    @Sara.a.v.Dahlberg Рік тому +5

    Is it just me or did this episode feel like one second 😅
    love you 3 ❤
    the high point of this day day ❤

  • @Lolo_Schmidt
    @Lolo_Schmidt Рік тому +1

    FYI for Ashley, I’ve watched your special twice now. Also, when YT recommends Matt Rife content I click not interested. 😂 Your comedy is right up my alley. Found you through YT shorts and then found this podcast and now subscribe and watch all 3 of you. ❤❤

  • @ShijiruP
    @ShijiruP Рік тому +4

    Ashley I loved your special!! I have watched it 3 times.
    Please, if you could, add subtitles. I love to share your special, but for people whose first language isn't English, sometimes they need a little help.
    Keep on being one of the best Milenial comedians ❤️

    • @KimsiePimsie
      @KimsiePimsie Рік тому +1

      There are subtitles! You need to press the button on it on youtube, it's the 6th option on the right corner on the video for subtitles, in the same place as the play button, vulome etc. but then on the right. If you use a laptop or computer you could also just press c on your keyboard for it to work. They are english subtitles, i don't know if you maybe meant subtitles in an other langauge