I married a Filipina with a kid treated her daughter just like one of my own. The twist is I was a single parent of 2 girls from a previous marriage. She helped raise both of them. Besides having 2 daughters with her makes 5 daughters. Been married 32 years.
A point you failed to make is that it is illegal to live with a woman if she was married, because she can't get a divorce and you can be thrown in jail for living with a woman that is married to another man, even if he has abandoned the wife and any children. The other man may even come back and blackmail you into paying him to not having you put in jail.
Brian, Great audio-visual quality and one of your finest vlogs ever, acutely perceptively analyzing the many complex, multi-faceted issues attending either marrying or dating a Filipina with child/children with reasoned fairness all round. Congratulations, and keep up the great thoughtful work in exploring the pros and cons of important cultural relationship issues involving men, women, children, and family life in the Philippines. You hit a home run right out of the park, Brian, bravo, you nailed all the key relevant issues down, as few before you ever have!)
I met a Filippina with children in America in 2018 and have been happily married to her since 2019. She has 3 kids in their 20s and I am now semi-retired in the Philippines with her and her children.
I've heard of guys who get their lady to quit her job, promising to pay everything, then they get bored or something better comes along and leave her without a job or support. So many people carry on endlessly this and that about Filipinas, but no one ever questions the integrity or intent of the one with the money. A significant percentage of visitors and expats treat the country as a sex playground to the point where human beings become a commodity. The rush of social and financial power seems to make some people do things they would never do at home. I've always been a marriage type of man so I guess my view is somewhat biased, but I can't abide seeing bright-eyed hopeful young women being treated disrespectfully by men who never hang around to see the devastation they leave behind, especially in small provincial towns... many tales to tell from the last 13 years.
Thanks Brian , you gave a good insight on what are the pitfalls of dating a single mother. The biggest one for me would be the lack of discipline of the kids. You are expected to pay all of the expenses of the child but you have no say in installing discipline and accountability in the child because you are told that you are not their father and cant tell them what to do.
You couldn't have said that better, well done been there now and it's an impossible mission...the kids of Filipina are simply angels...not children that need boundaries in life 🤔🤗♥️
One of your best talking-head vlogs. I think guys will gain a lot if you do more of them in the future. Thank you for your perspective, and for manning up to take care of Lot, HG, and BB. Stay safe and healthy.
Hey Brian what’s up buddy I like very much your video & visual I learn a lot from your advice your cool keep it up You always show us new things & the reality of life .. u got it goin on
Probably one of your best videos. Very informative Phil. Good job. I'm in that boat you described. Married a woman here in the states with a child in the Provinces. You are absolutely correct. Plus you raised some interesting points. Thanks.
Brian…I share your opinions on this subject. There may be exceptions, but your takes are generally true. I hope that your subscribers that are beginning or thinking of starting a relationship with a Filipina listen to this video closely.
Fantastic video Brian. I really hope foreign guys take note of the excellent advice your giving. What your saying is excactly how it is in the Philippines.
OMG Brian. Hitting the nail on the head. I married my wife 18 years ago this Dec. and granted neither one of us had kids at the time there is one other factor I think you missed. When you marry a Filipina you marry the family :-) . Its defiantly a different culture that we in the USA would need to be open to if we are to have a successful relationship. That took me a while to accept and honestly still is at times. but love your vlogs and hope to catch up with you in Oct. 2022. Take care and hope you and your family stay healthy and safe.
Great vid on relationships in the PI. Clark tours always a WINNER! So many nuggets on the "ole yard/base" like Sitting Bull with the chicken fried steak Southern Breakfast....yum! Thx Brian. 👍🏾✌🏾
Great video Brian there's also the unulment part if you want to marry a separated Filipina. Now that is a headache. Filipino court's and laws will absolutely do your head in.
Hi Brian, great subject about marriage and kids because it affects everyone involved. My wife who I met here in the US didn't really want to have children and just wanted to work full-time and continue her education so our nieces and nephews were kind of our kids. Both of us have large families and are very close. Once you have children your live really changes. Have a great day!!
Brian that was the best video I've heard you do, straight from the heart, and such a difficult subject to have, without upsetting those around you 🤔🤔🤗👍♥️
My wife doesn't have any kids but we talked for about 4 years before we decided to meet and that's because we were just friends at first then things got more serious as time went on. I'm the same age as you are and I have the same views on many things just like you have. I guess that dating or marrying a Filipina with kids can be great as long as you get to know her and visit her first before you take that next step as we must think things through first before making that commitment. Best not to hurry into any relationships so that it doesn't come crashing down from things that you might not have known.
I decided at 15 to not have or live with children. It isn't for me. When my brother moved out that was the last time that I lived in a house with a kid. Best decision I ever made. The child free life is great. I won't date a girl that has, or wants, kids. My vasectomy frees me from the argument. That zero swimmers report seals the deal.
I have done it for 5 years with one single mom. i like the experience and am seeking another one. I know one channel discourages men from pursuing them and darkskinned beauties, but it's up to the man's preference and positive experiences.
As a Filipina, I agreed, 99.9% you’re right, it is what it is. Most women has an agenda, for better or for worse, because being poor, and a single mother, you’re on your own. Here comes a knight and shining armor, thinking it will change your life for the better. I had friends that did bad things to those guys just to milk them for money, while pretending those guys are out of there lives. Still sleep with their exes , while living their foreigner partners. Not all, but most of these women stays to enrich themselves . I also have friends brought to the US by their husband thinking that their submissive and loyal, down to earth. But boy, surprise, surprise, the little innocent naive girl starts to change, more demanding and materialistic to boot.Very rarely they stick to them. Like they say, more Kano, ( slang for American man ) to choose from, they drop those old men like a hot sack of potatoes.
Good topic and yes it can be a bad thing to get involved with a lady that has kids. Not only can they hide how many kids they have but have heard some hide that they are already married. You are right the some fathers find out and come back just to get some cash to go away but you can also get into legal trouble depending on the circumstances and for sure legal trouble if the lady you are with is married. I know there are lots of Filipinas that are honest out there and things can work out really good but they can also go really bad. I am planning to move there in the next few months but will not be getting involved with anyone that already has kids or wants kids. I am getting too old for that.
Good topic Brian👌it has been happening in the Phil.and I think some old folks has to think about it🤔I always thought Hannah is your biological daughter, you got a lot of similarities and you treated her like your own🥰I agree on everything you said👌
I am married to a Filipina and we live In the USA..There is a 30 yr.age diff..When we first got together,I was not really sure..I told her, the only way our relationship will work, I will promise to send her to school, to find an occupations as I would be around forever.We have been married 15yrs,I am now retired 8yrs and my wife is a registered nurse..We both still contribute to family, it is part of what you sign up for..We have no children together, so we support some of our nieces and nephews, for me it is a joy to watch them from..
Brian your points on whether to Date or Marry a Filipina with "a Child" or children is a highly subjective individual decision. Your points are all valid, however from an individual perspective anyone who wants to Date/Marry a Filipina should as matter of conscience and Moral Integrity be clear on what he will or won't accept. Once that hurdled has been cleared and understood by both parties then clear eyed individuals should be at ease with their decision. In your particular situation you wholeheartedly accepted your spouse's child. It no doubt was based on a honest and fully disclosed conversation with her, and you stood up for both as a man should once you understand the implications of your choice and make a commitment. When one makes a morally conscious decision to step up to the plate, it strengthens your bond if you move forward to accept a package deal. Even if she knew or said it was okay if you did not want her Child in your relationship it would not last long. The bond/relationship with most Mothers with their Child/Children is lifelong bond and unbreakable. So understanding that of kind of bond is key to a successful relationship with any woman if you want this Woman in your life for a lifetime.
Hi Brian, I always enjoy watching your videos, especially those when you visit Clark. Having been assigned to Clark for five years, your visits there always bring back fond memories for me of my time in the Philippines.
Sensible topics to bring up when the relationship starts to look steady. Payoff for peace and quiet are not a great idea because it seldom stops so definitely something to consider. Doing the right thing is important for longevity in considering the new country or current situation. I've been having these same thoughts as I contemplate a future relocation. Thanks for the birds eye view !
Thanks for sharing. I've been under the impression that Hannah was your child. She looks like she is mixed American/Filipino. I thought you and Lots have been together for the past 14 yrs which is Hannahs age. Glad this cleared it up in my mind.
Yea her daddy is a white guy as you can tell....I can't remember where Lut said he was from not sure if he was American it's mentioned in some of there first videos. They got married here in the states she came on a 1 yr. visa....go back and check his earlier videos it shows them packing up and travelling to the Philippines. cheers :)
You're a better man than I am Sam because I don't think I could raise another man's child regardless of how much I love the woman. Now don't shoot this commentator because it's just me.
I completely agree with you. When I go into a relationship I am #1 priority. Now with children and the dog or cats I’m now not a priority, they are. I have no say in correcting the child. It’s a great video though. It makes you look at the reality of life.
good perspective on coming into a different culture, way of thinking. i almost married a filipino with 2 kids. it didn’t work out, and i feel that was a blessing because i met and married a filipino with no kids and now we have a 7 year old and am glad i chose to wait
For those of you that are not here..just one example. My wife is a midwife. She has 28 volunteer workers in her health center. 27 married. 15 of the 27 have foreign boyfriends online who send money. This is all approved of by their husbands. Why wouldn't it be. You are an extra income for their family. They know that 99.5% of foreigners will never come to the Philippines. And if you do and build a house, raise their kids, give them a better life then so much the better. The husband will have his girlfriend and visitation with the wife if he wants. Uncle Paul stays in the guest room sometimes.
Very good subject and a lot of great insight. I’m married to a Filipina with a child and to me that’s okay and my wife’s daughter is a great kid. I also take care of my wife and her kid and I love taking care of them.
IMO any single male with no kids is making the worse decision ever in dating single moms. Besides her losing her guy to disease or accident, usually you will just be the guy cleaning up her mess. Whether she didn’t do what she was supposed to in previous relationship or she picked the wrong guy and got burned, even thou signs were there. You should just say no to single moms
If you're happy with the woman and with the kid or kids and they are happy with you, why stop being happy? If you're happy making a baby and your wife is happy too, then why let age stop you from being happy? A baby is a gift from heaven.
Come on everyone who watches, this is one of the best down to earth, honest vlogger. Hit that sub button for his goal. Thanks Brian, another well informative video 👍👍👍
Very excellent and informative video here Brian. I would argue that you are an expert on the subject. I guarantee you helped someone further their thoughts about the many aspects of dating a Filipina, with or without kids.
I know 2 for 2. Where the fathers suddenly appeared out of nowhere and wanted paid to have nothing to do with his kids, because the mother was dating a foreigner. The fathers were not active in the child's life.
I met my wife online through a friend of mine who was chatting with her best friend. We chatted everyday for about a week before she(very shyly) told me about her almost 3yo daughter. She told me about the sperm donor(married,wealthy,Filipino), who she worked for as a housekeeper.And how he fired her as soon as she told him she was pregnant. We chatted everyday for 7 mo.(except 5 when either she or I had to work).She was a waitress there in Angeles(saw her work permit,and compared it to the “gro”’s permit),before I spent 3 weeks with her,a few days in Manila,a week with her family,and 10 days in AC. I was and am fine with supporting her daughter.Some people will think I got scammed/am a fool after this next part of our story,but as Brian said”Its the Philippines.” It took me another 10 years to save the money(my inheritance from the death of my father) to return.I moved her back to the provinces and assumed responsibility for their needs.Unbeknownst to me I was actually supporting 3 people(my wife,her daughter,and her son).She was actually pregnant and did not know it when I was there. I remember about 1.5 months before I arrived(the first time) her telling me she was having “trouble” at work,but she would not go into detail,she just told me she had found a new job. After I returned home, she complained of a painful period(possible ectopic pregnancy???)and that she wanted to go back to her family,”because her daughter called her aunt “mommy”,while on the phone with her.” When I arrived after 10 yrs., to marry her,I was introduced initially to her “nephew”. But something about their interactions and the fact that he had her last name,and did not have any brothers or uncles with children made me suspicious. One evening, she went out with her family and friends to plan our wedding,leaving me alone with him.(Note: I am not proud to say this) I searched her room and found his birth certificate and that he was her son. I had a choice to make, 1. Walk away and break everyones heart and throw 10 years together away. or 2. Accept what had happened and move on together. I was hurt that she didn’t think I would accept what happened,BUT I also understood the reality of life in the Philippines. When she returned,I told her I knew the truth about her son(she started crying),I told her “I would accept him as my son.””He is as much a part of her as her daughter,how can I love her and not love them too.” That is what you have to ask yourself when she tells you she has children. “Can I love them,as a part of her?” Because they are part of her,no mother should ever be asked to give up her children for companionship/support. That is my experience with loving a Filipina with children.We have been married now for just over 4 yrs.And we plan on growing old together(she promised to “change my diapers” when I am old!😂😂😂).
Brian great points , i have seen all of what you said and even a few more. You have yourself a great little family. Question how old was Hannah Grace when you and Lot's brought her back to live with you? I see how you live and like all you say in the vedio's Topics are what people need to learn about. thank you for sharing. keep safe
Howdy, yes I am one of the guys in you story. I met my sweetheart online. It was hard to get information from her about anything in her past. Finally after asking a few hundred the, she opens up, yes she had a child, yes the dad is a bum! Refused to take the step up. Since then my step son finally met him face to face. He found out all about him….. I loved him as if he was my own son, I helped him through school. His Mom was a teacher at the time. When I first arrived there, his friends saw us both riding in a truck, he would tell everyone this is my Dad! He was proud to show everyone that I was real. We were married in ‘03, I brought my gal to the US, in ‘06. Our plan is to return back to the Philippines in few years from know, personally can’t be soon enough. Yes, there is a lot to consider , only wisdom I can offer is that’s it slow, don’t be in a hurry. You have to ask yourself a lot of questions, about how you really feel about not just her, cause you won’t be marrying here but her in-laws as well.
I’ve been a longtime subscriber and love the genuine honesty in your videos. I’d love to travel to the Philippines one day and can live vicariously through you with that common fantasy of being with a beautiful Filipina and living abroad.
Hooking up with a woman who has children can be a big plus in a couple of ways. Children can be a lot of fun, but, if they're not yours you simply give them back when you're tired of them. If the lady is busy with the kids, it gives you an opportunity to get out on your own. Are 2 who are now grown up have been fantastic, as a matter of fact when my stepson came to Toronto, for the 1st couple of years he was always rushing outside to shovel the snow off of the driveway (major bonus) & he & his sister are also great cooks.
You are so right, here in the Philippines there is a big difference in relationships Don't rush into one, learn about how things are here first please respect there beliefs there Coulter and there Law's.
You marry a Filipina, you marry her whole family. I've seen it. Yes, there are some who are not like that but majority of them are like that so be wise.
Brian, very informative video. You hit most all the key points for foreigners wanting to hook up with a lady there, and the same applies here in Thailand.
Of course if you marry Filipina, you marry her family also. Because Filipinas are family oriented. Most Filipinos visit their parents, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts, nephews, nieces, cousins at least once a month or year, especially if they live in the same city. It's mostly the women who want their family to visit their kinfolks. Some men like to socialize with their relatives unlike how they stereotypically play in movies how Americans dread meeting their relatives on Thanksgiving Day.
Thanks for the info on this subject. I am learning every day about my birth country. At times, I wonder how some people can live their life. Now, I know how things come and go around.
Pay as you go.... no contract IMO. Freedom, enjoy the place & culture. So many clueless guys in Phi & Thai who say 'this ones different'. Of course some success stories ... and very best to the guys who've found a good one & good fanily.
I've been in a relationship with my GF and her 2 kids for two and a half years. We plan on getting married in the Fall of 2022. Two things I would like to bring up: 1) realize that the kids have been required to stay in the house for about 18 months due to Covid-19 restrictions 2) most of them require medical attention (especially dental). Number 1 required funds for a school tablet. Number 2 required braces and tooth extractions. All of course funded by myself. I might also mention when birthdays come along count on the neighbors to show up for food/swimming outings.
The braces most of the time are a fashion statement and a sign of supposed wealth most of them don't even need braces it is just a keeping up with the joneses thing.
I'm 59 and my Filipino wife has 3 butifull girls and the girls love me as I was there birth father but then again my Filipino wife is 38 and youdont have To be blood to love her kids thanks for the content brian
Love your videos Brian. I hope to come visit the Philippines and meet some of my Facebook friends. I been listening to some of your advice/suggestions and been a subscriber since maybe when you back with 50K subs
That would be the best video you have done. you show an understanding of what the situation is for these women. You also have the right attitude to take on a family. There is an old saying any fool can make a child but it takes a real man to be a father. maybe see you at tequila reef
Backstory: I have recently retired. I am clearing up a few last-minute medical/dental issues. I wanted to get the temperature, mindset, and yes pictures of the local girls looking for a foreigner BF I have lived in the Philippines before when I was "Station Dito" in Cubi Point many years ago. I married a Philippina and we lived in US for 20 mostly happy years together. I was reading (and occasionally posting) on a group where gals were looking for a foreigner BF. One day I get a FB message from a gal and we start chatting nearly daily. She did not ask for anything and I did not offer. Within 2 hours she tells me she "Loves" me. Red Flag 1. I tell her I am planning to retire in the Philippines in a couple months. She tells me we should build a house on her families property. By we should build, that means me. Major Red Flag 2. Even though she lives outside of Manila, she wanted to meet me in Cebu. I am expected to pay her expenses for her getting there. Kind of expected that. Once we met in person, then we are a couple. Once I take her to the hotel and do the wild thing, we see no one else. We are a couple. She is 38 which doesn't matter to me. Since we are now a couple, if she lived with me, we (meaning me) would need to send her children P5K a month each (Yes $200US each month) Red Flag 3 and we have not met in person yet. Now since we will live in Cebu, she would need P5K a month to go see her kids ($100 US, each way, so another $200US). Then she would need some "spending" money to spoil them while she is there. (another $200US) Red Flag 4. She is telling me she has already determined that I should spend $600 month on her and her kids. That did not work for me. I never send her a dime. I was done. I was out. I was not falling for it for a minute. I told her it would not work, bye! It was an interesting 4 days.
your right everyone probably has a different story...I got lucky, or maybe she got lucky,hehe...I married a highly successful Filipina who comes from a political family with multiple degrees...no kids 12 years and still going.....nice advice Brian
I never dated women with kids before I married my wife. Why would I raise her know kids? I wanted my own. Never support the extended family or the hands never go away. If you do marry a woman with kids, it's more likely she'll be a more responsible partner. because she needs that security blanket. Also, women can use their kids against you and accuse you of abuse if she gets upset with you. Be careful.
I did go through the US Embassy get all documents to legally marry . While i was away working she found a new home in Friendship Plaza in Korean town i told ir had to have western influences hor water showers and AC 4 beds 4 baths that was 2005 The thing is if you married Filipena look at your budget to support the kids Ny step children l put them in West Field international school they went threw graduated elementary and High school And my oldest 27 grad collage Practicing CPA my youngest is in her 2nd year collage at University of Missouri USA I did pay to finish up my wife's 2 years medical school I tell the story because if you married a Filipina with kids you have step up and do what dads do . BRIAN HATS OFF BROTHER YOU STEPPED UP DOING A FANTASTIC JOB WITH THE KUDS
Brian. great video. As always you said what you have learned. One thing you are a lucky man. Your wife is a wonderful woman and mum you are lucky. Hannah is like her mum she knows what she wants and is going for it 👍👍👍 for Hannah. What you talked about is your feelings. Which I like about your videos. Thanks for beaning truthful. All the best for you and your family. One thing you didn’t mention was Bing Bing. What the 2 of you do for her is amazing.👍👍👍 Just keep it up and thank you Bill
All people have value, but a childless Pinay has more potential. All things being equal, it is less stressful to not have an instant family. A child is a non-starter for me. Your mileage may vary.
So , my wife had a son in PI & u bet she strongly encouraged & helped guide him to the US , & the story is like a fairy tale life, now . BTW, she was in the States when I met her. & there r a lot here , for sure , but some of u may mis-catorgorize them , & not know it. P.S. - ur VERY close to 100K!!
Most guys don't give it much thought when they get involved with a woman in regards to long term or marriage(No Divorce). You're married to her whole family that is poor in need of help generally speaking. Get off western mentality and know the culture before making lifetime decisions.
I’m not sure about that’s the culture to take care of her family that’s not one’s responsibility for being married cmon this would make no sense. Even if it’s trend like many bad trends this would be one. Just like people say don’t bring western ways to the Phil’s don’t speak Filipino ways and expect one to do it because you claim it’s part of the culture that’s bologna 😎
I have a filipina girlfriend and we've been dating for 7 years. I was supposed to move there in May of 2020 but here comes covid. She has 2 sons and a daughter. Her sons are married now and one is paying his way to go to college in Canada and the other is working in Singapore as a airplane mechanic. She didn't have a lot of money and the father did send money for support most every month. Her sons worked very hard to be in the positions they're in. She did a great job in raising them to be men. Her daughter is 13 now and she wants to go to college and after graduating she wants to be a missionary. She will only ask for assistance from me if she absolutely needs it. If I feel she needs it I will send anyway if she doesn't ask. I hope to move there later this year or the beginning of next year. I watch all of your videos and Lot's too. Would love to meet you both when I get there.
The things you bring up Brian, can be said for anywhere. Yes there are a lot of Americans who come to the Phillipines to have some young beautiful GF... but these same men need to set boundaries for themselves. Remember you're there to have a good time. Some times those relationships grow strong but you have to set boundaries and make sure that its what you want. No one should feel pressured to do anything they dont want. If you do, then its more then likely time to make your exit... as you said... this I s just my opinion.
I married a Filipina with a kid treated her daughter just like one of my own. The twist is I was a single parent of 2 girls from a previous marriage. She helped raise both of them. Besides having 2 daughters with her makes 5 daughters. Been married 32 years.
I married my American wife with a kid. I adopted her and we just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary last Monday.
Thanks for sharing 👍
20 years involved with Philippines...I learned my lesson about other men's children..never..ever again..
A point you failed to make is that it is illegal to live with a woman if she was married, because she can't get a divorce and you can be thrown in jail for living with a woman that is married to another man, even if he has abandoned the wife and any children. The other man may even come back and blackmail you into paying him to not having you put in jail.
That question can be asked about ANY woman with kids. Not just Filipina women.
Brian, Great audio-visual quality and one of your finest vlogs ever, acutely perceptively analyzing the many complex, multi-faceted issues attending either marrying or dating a Filipina with child/children with reasoned fairness all round. Congratulations, and keep up the great thoughtful work in exploring the pros and cons of important cultural relationship issues involving men, women, children, and family life in the Philippines. You hit a home run right out of the park, Brian, bravo, you nailed all the key relevant issues down, as few before you ever have!)
True true👍👍👍
Providing financial support can be very important. Providing emotional support and love can be priceless.
Brain, great video. Great content and thanks for touching on this subject. Thanks for sharing your story as well .
I met a Filippina with children in America in 2018 and have been happily married to her since 2019. She has 3 kids in their 20s and I am now semi-retired in the Philippines with her and her children.
That was such a good video. Really thought provoking
Good video, thanks for sharing Philly
👍🇺🇲
I've heard of guys who get their lady to quit her job, promising to pay everything, then they get bored or something better comes along and leave her without a job or support. So many people carry on endlessly this and that about Filipinas, but no one ever questions the integrity or intent of the one with the money. A significant percentage of visitors and expats treat the country as a sex playground to the point where human beings become a commodity. The rush of social and financial power seems to make some people do things they would never do at home.
I've always been a marriage type of man so I guess my view is somewhat biased, but I can't abide seeing bright-eyed hopeful young women being treated disrespectfully by men who never hang around to see the devastation they leave behind, especially in small provincial towns... many tales to tell from the last 13 years.
If a filipina with or without kids go to you guys, it means she is looking for a provider, that's it
Often very right
Very true
He's looking for a beautiful young girl, she's looking for money. That's the deal - if you don't understand that you're a fool.
Thanks Brian , you gave a good insight on what are the pitfalls of dating a single mother. The biggest one for me would be the lack of discipline of the kids. You are expected to pay all of the expenses of the child but you have no say in installing discipline and accountability in the child because you are told that you are not their father and cant tell them what to do.
You couldn't have said that better, well done been there now and it's an impossible mission...the kids of Filipina are simply angels...not children that need boundaries in life 🤔🤗♥️
100% agree with you.Not being able to discipline when you are the head of the household isn’t a good situation to be in.
Good subject and info from you someone with experience. Many people don't take everything into consideration when making decisions.
I married a filipina with 2 boys. Been married 10 years and must say it was the best decision I've ever made.
One of your best talking-head vlogs. I think guys will gain a lot if you do more of them in the future. Thank you for your perspective, and for manning up to take care of Lot, HG, and BB. Stay safe and healthy.
Hey Brian what’s up buddy I like very much your video & visual I learn a lot from your advice your cool keep it up You always show us new things & the reality of life .. u got it goin on
Probably one of your best videos. Very informative Phil. Good job. I'm in that boat you described. Married a woman here in the states with a child in the Provinces. You are absolutely correct. Plus you raised some interesting points. Thanks.
Brian, the artillery memorial was the right choice in location for this topic- marrying or dating a filipina with kids- INCOMING!!!!
Best comment today! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 INCOMING!!!
Brian…I share your opinions on this subject. There may be exceptions, but your takes are generally true. I hope that your subscribers that are beginning or thinking of starting a relationship with a Filipina listen to this video closely.
Fantastic video Brian. I really hope foreign guys take note of the excellent advice your giving. What your saying is excactly how it is in the Philippines.
OMG Brian. Hitting the nail on the head. I married my wife 18 years ago this Dec. and granted neither one of us had kids at the time there is one other factor I think you missed. When you marry a Filipina you marry the family :-) . Its defiantly a different culture that we in the USA would need to be open to if we are to have a successful relationship. That took me a while to accept and honestly still is at times. but love your vlogs and hope to catch up with you in Oct. 2022. Take care and hope you and your family stay healthy and safe.
Great vid on relationships in the PI. Clark tours always a WINNER! So many nuggets on the "ole yard/base" like Sitting Bull with the chicken fried steak Southern Breakfast....yum! Thx Brian. 👍🏾✌🏾
Great video Brian there's also the unulment part if you want to marry a separated Filipina. Now that is a headache. Filipino court's and laws will absolutely do your head in.
Brian you always do a good job on a sensitive subject regardless of the situation some men man up!
Hi Brian, great subject about marriage and kids because it affects everyone involved. My wife who I met here in the US didn't really want to have children and just wanted to work full-time and continue her education so our nieces and nephews were kind of our kids. Both of us have large families and are very close. Once you have children your live really changes. Have a great day!!
Brian that was the best video I've heard you do, straight from the heart, and such a difficult subject to have, without upsetting those around you 🤔🤔🤗👍♥️
Thanks for being candid with sharing your own experience. Please share more so we can get to learn more
My wife doesn't have any kids but we talked for about 4 years before we decided to meet and that's because we were just friends at first then things got more serious as time went on. I'm the same age as you are and I have the same views on many things just like you have. I guess that dating or marrying a Filipina with kids can be great as long as you get to know her and visit her first before you take that next step as we must think things through first before making that commitment. Best not to hurry into any relationships so that it doesn't come crashing down from things that you might not have known.
I decided at 15 to not have or live with children. It isn't for me. When my brother moved out that was the last time that I lived in a house with a kid. Best decision I ever made. The child free life is great.
I won't date a girl that has, or wants, kids. My vasectomy frees me from the argument. That zero swimmers report seals the deal.
I feel the same way too. Kids are expensive...
Very well said.
You two have 2 great kid's
I have done it for 5 years with one single mom. i like the experience and am seeking another one. I know one channel discourages men from pursuing them and darkskinned beauties, but it's up to the man's preference and positive experiences.
As a Filipina, I agreed, 99.9% you’re right, it is what it is. Most women has an agenda, for better or for worse, because being poor, and a single mother, you’re on your own. Here comes a knight and shining armor, thinking it will change your life for the better. I had friends that did bad things to those guys just to milk them for money, while pretending those guys are out of there lives. Still sleep with their exes , while living their foreigner partners. Not all, but most of these women stays to enrich themselves . I also have friends brought to the US by their husband thinking that their submissive and loyal, down to earth. But boy, surprise, surprise, the little innocent naive girl starts to change, more demanding and materialistic to boot.Very rarely they stick to them. Like they say, more Kano, ( slang for American man ) to choose from, they drop those old men like a hot sack of potatoes.
Valuable comment and excellent English. Thank you, Beth!
@ChinesePlastic well said and very true
Good topic and yes it can be a bad thing to get involved with a lady that has kids. Not only can they hide how many kids they have but have heard some hide that they are already married. You are right the some fathers find out and come back just to get some cash to go away but you can also get into legal trouble depending on the circumstances and for sure legal trouble if the lady you are with is married. I know there are lots of Filipinas that are honest out there and things can work out really good but they can also go really bad. I am planning to move there in the next few months but will not be getting involved with anyone that already has kids or wants kids. I am getting too old for that.
Good topic Brian👌it has been happening in the Phil.and I think some old folks has to think about it🤔I always thought Hannah is your biological daughter, you got a lot of similarities and you treated her like your own🥰I agree on everything you said👌
I made it clear with my wife I will support her and the two kids but not her family
I am married to a Filipina and we live In the USA..There is a 30 yr.age diff..When we first got together,I was not really sure..I told her, the only way our relationship will work, I will promise to send her to school, to find an occupations as I would be around forever.We have been married 15yrs,I am now retired 8yrs and my wife is a registered nurse..We both still contribute to family, it is part of what you sign up for..We have no children together, so we support some of our nieces and nephews, for me it is a joy to watch them from..
Brian your points on whether to Date or Marry a Filipina with "a Child" or children is a highly subjective individual decision. Your points are all valid, however from an individual perspective anyone who wants to Date/Marry a Filipina should as matter of conscience and Moral Integrity be clear on what he will or won't accept. Once that hurdled has been cleared and understood by both parties then clear eyed individuals should be at ease with their decision. In your particular situation you wholeheartedly accepted your spouse's child. It no doubt was based on a honest and fully disclosed conversation with her, and you stood up for both as a man should once you understand the implications of your choice and make a commitment. When one makes a morally conscious decision to step up to the plate, it strengthens your bond if you move forward to accept a package deal. Even if she knew or said it was okay if you did not want her Child in your relationship it would not last long. The bond/relationship with most Mothers with their Child/Children is lifelong bond and unbreakable. So understanding that of kind of bond is key to a successful relationship with any woman if you want this Woman in your life for a lifetime.
If you're 75 and your girlfriend has a baby it might make things easier. After she changes the baby's diaper, she can change yours!
Haha! Needed a good laugh.
Good words Brian! Keep the vlogs coming!!!
Hi Brian, I always enjoy watching your videos, especially those when you visit Clark. Having been assigned to Clark for five years, your visits there always bring back fond memories for me of my time in the Philippines.
Sensible topics to bring up when the relationship starts to look steady. Payoff for peace and quiet are not a great idea because it seldom stops so definitely something to consider. Doing the right thing is important for longevity in considering the new country or current situation. I've been having these same thoughts as I contemplate a future relocation. Thanks for the birds eye view !
Thanks for sharing. I've been under the impression that Hannah was your child. She looks like she is mixed American/Filipino. I thought you and Lots have been together for the past 14 yrs which is Hannahs age. Glad this cleared it up in my mind.
Yea her daddy is a white guy as you can tell....I can't remember where Lut said he was from not sure if he was American it's mentioned in some of there first videos. They got married here in the states she came on a 1 yr. visa....go back and check his earlier videos it shows them packing up and travelling to the Philippines. cheers :)
I’m a first timer subscriber I’m glad I did 😊🤓👍
Great insight, thanks for sharing something me and many men didn't realize.
You're a better man than I am Sam because I don't think I could raise another man's child regardless of how much I love the woman. Now don't shoot this commentator because it's just me.
There’s so many reasons to not date/marry a single mom. Marriage already has no benefit for a man then adding on a child that isn’t yours… no thanks.
I completely agree with you. When I go into a relationship I am #1 priority. Now with children and the dog or cats I’m now not a priority, they are. I have no say in correcting the child. It’s a great video though. It makes you look at the reality of life.
good perspective on coming into a different culture, way of thinking. i almost married a filipino with 2 kids. it didn’t work out, and i feel that was a blessing because i met and married a filipino with no kids and now we have a 7 year old and am glad i chose to wait
For those of you that are not here..just one example. My wife is a midwife. She has 28 volunteer workers in her health center. 27 married. 15 of the 27 have foreign boyfriends online who send money. This is all approved of by their husbands. Why wouldn't it be. You are an extra income for their family. They know that 99.5% of foreigners will never come to the Philippines. And if you do and build a house, raise their kids, give them a better life then so much the better. The husband will have his girlfriend and visitation with the wife if he wants. Uncle Paul stays in the guest room sometimes.
Very good subject and a lot of great insight. I’m married to a Filipina with a child and to me that’s okay and my wife’s daughter is a great kid. I also take care of my wife and her kid and I love taking care of them.
Oh and I just retired yesterday and headed out to be with them now.
Very honest and I appreciate it. I know it makes me think twice about getting serious with a Filipina.
I really enjoyed this one probably because I agree with most of what you said
IMO any single male with no kids is making the worse decision ever in dating single moms. Besides her losing her guy to disease or accident, usually you will just be the guy cleaning up her mess. Whether she didn’t do what she was supposed to in previous relationship or she picked the wrong guy and got burned, even thou signs were there. You should just say no to single moms
If you're happy with the woman and with the kid or kids and they are happy with you, why stop being happy? If you're happy making a baby and your wife is happy too, then why let age stop you from being happy? A baby is a gift from heaven.
Come on everyone who watches, this is one of the best down to earth, honest vlogger. Hit that sub button for his goal.
Thanks Brian, another well informative video 👍👍👍
Very excellent and informative video here Brian. I would argue that you are an expert on the subject. I guarantee you helped someone further their thoughts about the many aspects of dating a Filipina, with or without kids.
I know 2 for 2. Where the fathers suddenly appeared out of nowhere and wanted paid to have nothing to do with his kids, because the mother was dating a foreigner. The fathers were not active in the child's life.
HEY just wanted to remind you i watch daily,,Enjoy The Show....today as allways you were spot on again with your honest OPINION....thanks
I was blessed to be with my step daughters and sons. I’m grateful. Keep up the good work. Stay safe n be safe too. God blessed
I met my wife online through a friend of mine who was chatting with her best friend.
We chatted everyday for about a week before she(very shyly) told me about her almost 3yo daughter. She told me about the sperm donor(married,wealthy,Filipino), who she worked for as a housekeeper.And how he fired her as soon as she told him she was pregnant.
We chatted everyday for 7 mo.(except 5 when either she or I had to work).She was a waitress there in Angeles(saw her work permit,and compared it to the “gro”’s permit),before I spent 3 weeks with her,a few days in Manila,a week with her family,and 10 days in AC.
I was and am fine with supporting her daughter.Some people will think I got scammed/am a fool after this next part of our story,but as Brian said”Its the Philippines.”
It took me another 10 years to save the money(my inheritance from the death of my father) to return.I moved her back to the provinces and assumed responsibility for their needs.Unbeknownst to me I was actually supporting 3 people(my wife,her daughter,and her son).She was actually pregnant and did not know it when I was there. I remember about 1.5 months before I arrived(the first time) her telling me she was having “trouble” at work,but she would not go into detail,she just told me she had found a new job. After I returned home, she complained of a painful period(possible ectopic pregnancy???)and that she wanted to go back to her family,”because her daughter called her aunt “mommy”,while on the phone with her.”
When I arrived after 10 yrs., to marry her,I was introduced initially to her “nephew”.
But something about their interactions and the fact that he had her last name,and did not have any brothers or uncles with children made me suspicious.
One evening, she went out with her family and friends to plan our wedding,leaving me alone with him.(Note: I am not proud to say this) I searched her room and found his birth certificate and that he was her son. I had a choice to make,
1. Walk away and break everyones heart and throw 10 years together away.
or
2. Accept what had happened and move on together.
I was hurt that she didn’t think I would accept what happened,BUT I also understood the reality of life in the Philippines.
When she returned,I told her I knew the truth about her son(she started crying),I told her “I would accept him as my son.””He is as much a part of her as her daughter,how can I love her and not love them too.”
That is what you have to ask yourself when she tells you she has children.
“Can I love them,as a part of her?” Because they are part of her,no mother should ever be asked to give up her children for companionship/support.
That is my experience with loving a Filipina with children.We have been married now for just over 4 yrs.And we plan on growing old together(she promised to “change my diapers” when I am old!😂😂😂).
mug.
Brian great points , i have seen all of what you said and even a few more. You have yourself a great little family. Question how old was Hannah Grace when you and Lot's brought her back to live with you? I see how you live and like all you say in the vedio's Topics are what people need to learn about. thank you for sharing. keep safe
Howdy, yes I am one of the guys in you story. I met my sweetheart online. It was hard to get information from her about anything in her past. Finally after asking a few hundred the, she opens up, yes she had a child, yes the dad is a bum! Refused to take the step up.
Since then my step son finally met him face to face. He found out all about him….. I loved him as if he was my own son, I helped him through school. His Mom was a teacher at the time. When I first arrived there, his friends saw us both riding in a truck, he would tell everyone this is my Dad! He was proud to show everyone that I was real.
We were married in ‘03, I brought my gal to the US, in ‘06.
Our plan is to return back to the Philippines in few years from know, personally can’t be soon enough.
Yes, there is a lot to consider , only wisdom I can offer is that’s it slow, don’t be in a hurry.
You have to ask yourself a lot of questions, about how you really feel about not just her, cause you won’t be marrying here but her in-laws as well.
Great informative video Brian the breakfast looked yummy. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👌🇬🇧
I’ve been a longtime subscriber and love the genuine honesty in your videos. I’d love to travel to the Philippines one day and can live vicariously through you with that common fantasy of being with a beautiful Filipina and living abroad.
Hooking up with a woman who has children can be a big plus in a couple of ways. Children can be a lot of fun, but, if they're not yours you simply give them back when you're tired of them. If the lady is busy with the kids, it gives you an opportunity to get out on your own. Are 2 who are now grown up have been fantastic, as a matter of fact when my stepson came to Toronto, for the 1st couple of years he was always rushing outside to shovel the snow off of the driveway (major bonus) & he & his sister are also great cooks.
You are so right, here in the Philippines there is a big difference in relationships Don't rush into one, learn about how things are here first please respect there beliefs there Coulter and there Law's.
You marry a Filipina, you marry her whole family. I've seen it. Yes, there are some who are not like that but majority of them are like that so be wise.
Very true
Great topic Brian. I am with you bruh on that topic. Keep discussing those issues in the P.I. You, Lott and Anna Grace y’all stay safe.
Brian, very informative video. You hit most all the key points for foreigners wanting to hook up with a lady there, and the same applies here in Thailand.
Of course if you marry Filipina, you marry her family also. Because Filipinas are family oriented. Most Filipinos visit their parents, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts, nephews, nieces, cousins at least once a month or year, especially if they live in the same city. It's mostly the women who want their family to visit their kinfolks. Some men like to socialize with their relatives unlike how they stereotypically play in movies how Americans dread meeting their relatives on Thanksgiving Day.
All-in-all, a good thought-provoking video.
Good morning brian very good info I agree totally on make pay child support thanks for sharing this video take care
Great overview - congrats!
Thanks for the info on this subject. I am learning every day about my birth country. At times, I wonder how some people can live their life. Now, I know how things come and go around.
Pay as you go.... no contract IMO. Freedom, enjoy the place & culture.
So many clueless guys in Phi & Thai who say 'this ones different'. Of course some success stories ... and very best to the guys who've found a good one & good fanily.
Looking forward to catching up brian,regards john hall
I've been in a relationship with my GF and her 2 kids for two and a half years. We plan on getting married in the Fall of 2022. Two things I would like to bring up: 1) realize that the kids have been required to stay in the house for about 18 months due to Covid-19 restrictions 2) most of them require medical attention (especially dental). Number 1 required funds for a school tablet. Number 2 required braces and tooth extractions. All of course funded by myself. I might also mention when birthdays come along count on the neighbors to show up for food/swimming outings.
The braces most of the time are a fashion statement and a sign of supposed wealth most of them don't even need braces it is just a keeping up with the joneses thing.
I'm 59 and my Filipino wife has 3 butifull girls and the girls love me as I was there birth father but then again my Filipino wife is 38 and youdont have To be blood to love her kids thanks for the content brian
Love your videos Brian. I hope to come visit the Philippines and meet some of my Facebook friends. I been listening to some of your advice/suggestions and been a subscriber since maybe when you back with 50K subs
That would be the best video you have done. you show an understanding of what the situation is for these women. You also have the right attitude to take on a family. There is an old saying any fool can make a child but it takes a real man to be a father. maybe see you at tequila reef
You are spot on in what you are saying…..
Backstory: I have recently retired. I am clearing up a few last-minute medical/dental issues. I wanted to get the temperature, mindset, and yes pictures of the local girls looking for a foreigner BF I have lived in the Philippines before when I was "Station Dito" in Cubi Point many years ago. I married a Philippina and we lived in US for 20 mostly happy years together.
I was reading (and occasionally posting) on a group where gals were looking for a foreigner BF. One day I get a FB message from a gal and we start chatting nearly daily. She did not ask for anything and I did not offer. Within 2 hours she tells me she "Loves" me. Red Flag 1.
I tell her I am planning to retire in the Philippines in a couple months. She tells me we should build a house on her families property. By we should build, that means me. Major Red Flag 2.
Even though she lives outside of Manila, she wanted to meet me in Cebu. I am expected to pay her expenses for her getting there. Kind of expected that. Once we met in person, then we are a couple. Once I take her to the hotel and do the wild thing, we see no one else. We are a couple. She is 38 which doesn't matter to me. Since we are now a couple, if she lived with me, we (meaning me) would need to send her children P5K a month each (Yes $200US each month) Red Flag 3 and we have not met in person yet.
Now since we will live in Cebu, she would need P5K a month to go see her kids ($100 US, each way, so another $200US). Then she would need some "spending" money to spoil them while she is there. (another $200US) Red Flag 4.
She is telling me she has already determined that I should spend $600 month on her and her kids. That did not work for me. I never send her a dime. I was done. I was out. I was not falling for it for a minute. I told her it would not work, bye! It was an interesting 4 days.
LOL she is not a very good con woman.
your right everyone probably has a different story...I got lucky, or maybe she got lucky,hehe...I married a highly successful Filipina who comes from a political family with multiple degrees...no kids 12 years and still going.....nice advice Brian
Hey Brian my dear friend, also, awesome breakfast. It's definitely a breakfast for champions yes!!!!👍👍👍😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️
Single women with kids...not for me.
Good info Brian ! Thanks !
I never dated women with kids before I married my wife. Why would I raise her know kids? I wanted my own. Never support the extended family or the hands never go away. If you do marry a woman with kids, it's more likely she'll be a more responsible partner. because she needs that security blanket. Also, women can use their kids against you and accuse you of abuse if she gets upset with you. Be careful.
Good job
Philly in the Philippines
I love your blog shows
Keep it up
Good luck
I did go through the US Embassy get all documents to legally marry .
While i was away working she found a new home in Friendship Plaza in Korean town i told ir had to have western influences hor water showers and AC 4 beds 4 baths that was 2005
The thing is if you married Filipena look at your budget to support the kids
Ny step children l put them in West Field international school they went threw graduated elementary and High school
And my oldest 27 grad collage Practicing CPA my youngest is in her 2nd year collage at University of Missouri USA
I did pay to finish up my wife's 2 years medical school
I tell the story because if you married a Filipina with kids you have step up and do what dads do .
BRIAN HATS OFF BROTHER YOU STEPPED UP DOING A FANTASTIC JOB WITH THE KUDS
i learned early never be afraid to say no...walk away....
age doesnt matter...health does
Brian. great video.
As always you said what you have learned.
One thing you are a lucky man.
Your wife is a wonderful woman and mum you are lucky.
Hannah is like her mum she knows what she wants and is going for it 👍👍👍 for Hannah.
What you talked about is your feelings.
Which I like about your videos.
Thanks for beaning truthful.
All the best for you and your family.
One thing you didn’t mention was Bing Bing.
What the 2 of you do for her is amazing.👍👍👍
Just keep it up and thank you
Bill
Spot on Brian
All people have value, but a childless Pinay has more potential. All things being equal, it is less stressful to not have an instant family. A child is a non-starter for me. Your mileage may vary.
Thanks for sharing Brian
So , my wife had a son in PI & u bet she strongly encouraged & helped guide him to the US , & the story is like a fairy tale life, now . BTW, she was in the States when I met her. & there r a lot here , for sure , but some of u may mis-catorgorize them , & not know it.
P.S. - ur VERY close to 100K!!
Most guys don't give it much thought when they get involved with a woman in regards to long term or marriage(No Divorce). You're married to her whole family that is poor in need of help generally speaking. Get off western mentality and know the culture before making lifetime decisions.
I’m not sure about that’s the culture to take care of her family that’s not one’s responsibility for being married cmon this would make no sense. Even if it’s trend like many bad trends this would be one. Just like people say don’t bring western ways to the Phil’s don’t speak Filipino ways and expect one to do it because you claim it’s part of the culture that’s bologna 😎
I am lucky too with my Filipina stepdaughter, she's 11 and does great in school and she doesn't ask for alot.
I have a filipina girlfriend and we've been dating for 7 years. I was supposed to move there in May of 2020 but here comes covid. She has 2 sons and a daughter. Her sons are married now and one is paying his way to go to college in Canada and the other is working in Singapore as a airplane mechanic. She didn't have a lot of money and the father did send money for support most every month. Her sons worked very hard to be in the positions they're in. She did a great job in raising them to be men. Her daughter is 13 now and she wants to go to college and after graduating she wants to be a missionary. She will only ask for assistance from me if she absolutely needs it. If I feel she needs it I will send anyway if she doesn't ask. I hope to move there later this year or the beginning of next year. I watch all of your videos and Lot's too. Would love to meet you both when I get there.
The things you bring up Brian, can be said for anywhere. Yes there are a lot of Americans who come to the Phillipines to have some young beautiful GF... but these same men need to set boundaries for themselves. Remember you're there to have a good time. Some times those relationships grow strong but you have to set boundaries and make sure that its what you want. No one should feel pressured to do anything they dont want. If you do, then its more then likely time to make your exit... as you said... this I s just my opinion.
Well your doing a good job with the family, God bless 🙏🍀