End a Toddler Tantrum in 30 seconds with Gentle Parenting & Positive Discipline
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- Опубліковано 17 вер 2020
- They're on the floor, they're crying, they're screaming, kicking... I've got you! Here is an EFFECTIVE and QUICK method to help your toddler calm down following the principles of gentle parenting, respectful parenting and positive discipline. The tips I will share with you today will help you soothe your crying toddler without giving in AND without yelling and using timeout. This is a technique that I use all the time and that works every single time. This video is part of a series on self regulation and social emotional learning in early childhood.
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Instagram: @upwegrow_soraya
The more we learn about child development, the more compassion we have, and the better parents we will be.
I am a nanny for five little boys who often have big emotions and take it out on each other. The hardest part is keeping my own emotions in check. One of the little boys was upset that his brother took his favorite toy and I caught him right before he went to hit him, got his attention and named his emotion, validated and then ma knows how to use his words. He later randomly said "you know a lot about emotions" 😂 best compliment ever!
My toddler tends to get upset whenever we call her out when she does things that can get her hurt. She hits herself on her face then throw whatever she can reach. She sometimes hits me as well. She's only 19months. But when I hug her every time she gets upset, she stops. I hope she grows out of that behavior. It's kinda suprising
I use this method on adults. This works great 👍
I’m not sure how effective talking will be with my 2 year old while she’s super angry and freaking out - we do talk once she calms down enough to listen… but I love the idea of asking her to jump up and down or run around to get it out, we will try this.
Starts at approx 3:20
So I have been working on not giving in. But 95% of time I get down on her level and comfort her when she is having a meltdown. ❤
Thanks for this video. Very helpful reminders. Admittedly, I'm a newly single parent and having to approach a healthy way of de-escalating my LO's tantrum can be very challenging. It worked! Describing her emotions while validating them and giving hugs. We added some deep breathing too lol
I love the implications this method has on how to treat people who disagree with you- you need to empathize with the other person and recognize when they are in a position to listen to you. I can imagine that a kid would totally pick up on that from this.
Much love! ♥️♥️
I love this video. Thank you!
The best video I've been learning. Helps me , my baby and even my family❤❤
Your video was very helpful I'm a first time mom and my daughter is 2. Thank you it helped a lot!
THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO!!
Right on point!
Nice video , but most kids are just not gonna listen to anything once they activate tantrum mode. You deal with it according to the kid's personality. Good luck to all.
Very Helpful, thank you
Just subscribed, thank you so much for the content
Yes 👍.that's true.
Tellement précieux de savoir ce qui les apaise, merci ;-)
Good video! Thank you!
I love your videos
thank you for this, I am learning the tools to positive gentle parenting after suffering severe abuse and neglect as a child never learning the proper tools. thank you for your videos, this helps majorly. ❤
Super video..Really love this..This is ver very informative ❤
Great channel 👍
Amazing video
Hello Soraya! Where can I get the emotional intelligence curriculum for pre-schoolers?
So how do we even know if we're doing the right thing? If our parents were terrible people but they raised us, and we're good hearted... Then how do we know that being a good hearted parent is even the right way to raise kids ...isn't there a possibility that they just end up the opposite of what they received?
You are raising an interesting point here! In my opinion, if your parents were hard on you (like mine were on me) I didn’t turn out good-hearted BECAUSE of their education but IN SPITE OF it. I fully agree with the positive discipline approach and I reckon that if you treat your child with respect (which I was not always treated with) they will return the favour.
7:00 Which children's books about behavior do you recommend?
Love this ❤
Thank you dear ❤️
The technique is quick the video is not
How to help a 14 month old through a tantrum while trying to cook or go to toilet? Not soothed unless picking up.
Will these strategies work as a kindergarten teacher?
My 3 year old throws a tantrum this morning because I didn’t get up right away from bed. She wants to play first thing she got up and I was still in my dreams, needs a minute to get up but she wont allowed it. Just wants to play. She’d even say she’s hungry. Knowing she just want to play.
Same here 🙋🏽♀️ play first thing in the morning and also forced to read a book, my eyes can barely see anything.
What if they learn if they have a tantrum you both have to leave so they have a tantrum in all the places they don’t want to be but you need to be?
Yeah, I was wondering that too... depending on the context and the child's behaviour, I guess you can just ignore other people's reactions and wait for the child to calm down in the outdoor settings? (the road one would need intervention but a supermarket might not). Going straight to the car every time seems extreme to me.
How about 7 year olds?
So if you're outside do you drag them kicking and screaming to your car?
When my son has his „big feelings“ as we call it, for example at the zoo, and after I had told him that we would have to go to the car until he had calmed down, I first asked him if he wanted to walk alone to the car or if I should carry him. Since he was deep in his emotions he understandably didn’t react to it, so I explained to him that I would carry him to the car now (so no dragging). It’s important to me to show him that he ALWAYS has choices but he needs to make them, too. Then we went to the car and waited there, I held him and explained to him that what he was feeling was always okay but that how he reacted wasn’t always okay. We are „lucky“ in a way in that our son always allows us to hug him or hold him while he has a tantrum, which makes things easier. I am absolutely prescribed to positive discipline and I can understand up to certain point that some people might find this style permissive but frankly the opposite is the case. PD is all about setting boundaries and NOT allowing the child to behave as he pleases with no repercussions whatsoever, but this is done in a way that is respectful to the child (and the parent).
Wts th things tat v do do.. Then...
when my granddaughter (20 months) screams for no reason, I just look at her and let her cry it out, I'm not rewarding her bad behavior with giving her attention. By Bad Behavior I mean she doesn't get what she wants or she'll just walk up and scream to be picked up. If you pick her up, she stops but the second you put her down, scream.....nope, not doin that. Luckily, she knows better than to try that with me, she does it with her mama all the time and her mom picks her up, I tell her that is giving in to her bad behavior but she can't stand the screaming.
When they are having a meltdown they are not hearing you. They don’t want any comforting. Talking calmly doesn’t work.
Haha agree. My daughter in between crying says “mommy don’t talk”, so I’ve tried the empathizing, using your words, take a deep breathe methods. Basically she doesn’t want me around when she’s having a tantrum. Works for me
Agreeeee. Talking is easy, but they dont want anything, they dont want the hug, they dont want to be comforted, they dont want shit,
If you try to leave room they start to scream, you try to be a good mom and hug them they push you out and hit you , greaattttttte
Take some time away and then come back and try again. I think in these moments it's important to remember you're trying to teach your child how to cope. If they don't learn when they are little they will rage as teenagers/adults.
OMG thank God it's not just mine! First time mom hitting 2 years old and she seriously makes me freak out like to the point of tears i get so emotional thinking i have no idea how to control my baby😭 super intense
@@Jesusita1869 just know it is normal and we all go through it as parents. It doesn't mean we did something wrong or are bad parents
I'm sorry I appreciate the positive spin on all of this but if you're a parent how can you possibly think this is realistic? When my daughter is having a tantrum she can't hear me telling her that I know how she feels loll? She's screaming? She also won't let me touch or hug her and she hits me and tells me to go away? You have good intentions with this video but it's unrealistic.. so silly
Honestly? Just go. If it's not urgent, give her some space. Kids are just small adults, and I'm sure you can relate to not wanting someone watching you when you're crying and want to be alone. If it isn't an immediate problem, it's okay to solve it later.
Took 4 min to get to the point
No offence this does not work. My 3 year old scratched and slapped my face like a dog fight when I tried to comfort her. This works with dead and sober kids. If you have strong willed kids forget it.
Also any ASD/adhd in house this DEFINITELY does not work
Yeah, don't go near angry kids or angry dogs 😅. Imagine if you were angry, would you want physical comfort or someone in your space? probably not... likely they need space to vent or something else to focus on. the comfort part i think needs to happen after they've calmed down a bit, and should be a choice you offer them rather than obligation. 🤔
Don’t forget the “there’s always the belt” people
There really is no need for the belt we can learn more effective ways
@@parentingbeyondbehaviours6382 I’m just saying that there’s gonna be someone that will comment “if that don’t work, then there’s always the belt” or “a good old fashioned spanking”
A light tap on the backside never hurt anyone it’s called discipline not abuse big difference I agree using a belt is not necessary and a good way to get you’re kids taken away but a light spanking is not the end of the world would be nice if we could go back to a time when we could discipline our children because let’s face it talking to a toddler who’s having a total meltdown isn’t always the way to go as they are already aggravated as it is and don’t really want anyone talking to them
spanking, whether it’d be a light tap or not is ineffective, a toddler will never understand why you’re hitting them, all they will think is “mommy hit me and I didn’t like it”, and what discipline really means is to teach, and spanking teaches them nothing, other than to hit someone whenever someone does something they don’t like, and no communication skills whatsoever
Ok I hear you lol
A whip always work.