A Limit to "Love Your Enemies"?
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- Опубліковано 7 лют 2025
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I’m a survivor of trafficking as a child, and I struggle with this every day. When I heard about Nassar’s attack, my first thought was, “Good, now can that guy go stab my abusers a little bit?” I caught myself and said a prayer. St. Bakhita is my confirmation saint because I admire her ability to love and forgive her kidnappers and traffickers. Thank you for addressing this very hard topic, Father. I’m praying for you.
You're not alone. Remember, the Bible also says those who thirst for justice shall be blessed by God. Proper justice, mind you not vigilante type justice. We can forgive and still want justice.
Thank you for your courage. What I've described is not easy and no one would fault you if you still harbored some anger. But remember that anger destroys us from the inside out. You are right to let it go.
I know it’s hard for victims to feel safe while their abuser roams the world. I’m reading The Book of Forgiveness by Desmond Tutu who lives thru Aparteid. It’s been helpful
@themobbit9061 thank you for the recommendation. Forgiveness truly isn't a problem for me and I pray for my enemies daily. It's the lack of justice here in the material that can be hard; hard not to ask why, but when I do, I'm reminded why not me... Exposing the darkness purifies it. It also stops the occult from having legal ground to continue to harrass you.
Edit- God allowed me to see certain things so I could testify and witness about them. I see ehats truly happening- genocide, trafficking, euthanasia and it's all here in America. It's difficult. Ty for listening.
@@Witness03 All great thoughts. I agree. Why not me? It seems that suffering is perhaps the main experience of existence, therefore it must have the most meaning if we can use it as Jesus taught - with acceptance, love and forgiveness - hard and long a journey that can be!
Father this is tough. You picked a great example. I struggle with this when I think of people I disagree with, but men like this one are the toughest to consider worthy of any kind of peace. I'm going to pray on this today. I know I wasn't cheering when I heard he was stabbed, but I suffered from I think the worse sin of indeference when I heard it. I was neither "Oh great" nor was I "Oh that's terrible". I was just "Meh". I want to stop feeling "Meh" when others suffer, regardless of who they are. Pray for me.
I believe a more reclusive and silent life can help a lot with that. When I feel that feeling you just described, I know for myself i’m way too fed with all the noise and busy life around.
Silence or at least some detachment from this world along with prayer elevates me back closer to Him, and then natural love and care flow much more fluently through me.
When you do it enough it becomes much easier
“The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult; and left untried.” - G. K. Chesterton
why you calling him father
god is our heavenly father
@@reignellwalker9755What do you call your biological father?
I’m discerning became a Franciscan priest pray for me please
Praying
IMO Carmelites are the more authentic and sincere.
Paz et Bonum ! 🙏🙏 from Portugal 🇵🇹
I'll keep you in prayer until your decisions is made or you are ordained.
May the Holy Spirit guide you . Praying for your vocation.
I'm a survivor of parental abuse--my mother. There were times when I wanted revenge, badly, but I no longer do. thank GOd. when I saw the news about Nasser, all I could think was how awful it was. I'm with you, Father. I don't understand God's love at all, but it extends to everyone, or nobody gets it.
As a survivor of significant abuse, and I don’t always agree with everything you say Father… I couldn’t agree more ❤️ if we desire pain upon those who caused so much pain, we just hurt ourselves more. The biggest flex against something that hurts is to love. It took some time to get to this point of view, but to love rather than to hate is the biggest step to healing ❤️ thank you for sharing this brave message Father ❤️
He has reaped what he has sown. Had he not done these things, he would not be in this situation. However, what he "deserves" has nothing to do with it. Wicked people profit off of exploiting the innocent, children get sick with cancer and die. People will cry "they don't deserve this," but nobody deserves or is owed anything, really. We all suffer and face challenges and trials and consequences. In this man's case, what has happened is a consequence of his actions, one which was a foreseeable possibility when he willingly took those actions. Nothing more. If I stepped off of a balcony, I wouldn't expect anyone to be surprised that I fell.
Forgiveness is available to everyone, though, and he's welcome to take it. I hope he does. However, we must all live with the things we've done and the consequences they carry, even when we repent. I'm reminded of Jeffery Dahmer, who did some of the most heinous crimes in recent history. He's said to have repented in prison and excepted Christ, and I really believe he did. However, he knew that he could not undo his crimes and expressed to his family that he would accept whatever happened to him. He was killed in prison by a reportedly schizophrenic man that said God had told him to kill Dahmer. Dahmer did not deserve to be killed, but he accepted that his actions may bring this upon him. I'm grateful that he had the opportunity to repent before that time, however.
As for Nassar, I am not happy. I am not sad. I don't feel satisfied, nor that justice has been done. I don't feel this was deserved or undeserved. It's just a consequence of his imprisonment for his crimes. May God's will be done, whatever that may be.
I think that the biggest problem here is that we mix up “love” and “like”. “Liking” is all warm and fuzzy. “Loving” is far deeper. It recognizes that all of us are loved by God. It has the hope that all of us will wind up with God in Heaven. It hopes for repentance for ourselves and everyone else. This is a very tough post, but true!
AMEN AMEN AMEN
Mother Angelica used to say if we wait for feelings nothing would get done.
This video for example has such a nice sentiment on the surface, but if I stop to think about it logically for a moment I can't help but thinking Father Casey's limit is to love the sexual abuser and not the violent offender, not the system that put them together. He loves the man who abused innocent people and not the one who attacked a guilty party. He's with the system of oppression and against the one subjected to it doing his time in the cell. Creepy clergy -- and I'd think I were biased towards the Church, believe it or not, wanting to repair its reputation. Am I just getting the wrong message somehow?
Perhaps we should not blame either side and love each equally if we want to call ourselves Christian?
@@Sean-tb2zz I think that is what Father Casey is talking about There are many examples just in the United States of families and people who forgave the worst of the worst because that is what Christ told them to do. Most found that it was very freeing to not have the hate eat their soul. One dad got to know the man who murdered his daughter, I think by accident, but I’m not sure. He basically wasn’t an evil person, but someone who did an evil thing, but that wasn’t his life. I find reading the stories very inspiring, even if I can’t quite fully grasp the sentiment all the time
Beautifully said, and so true. I was abused by my father and uncle. I have forgiven them both, one I don't see but my father I love with all my heart. He has changed with the help and guidance of Our Lord and I am so thankful and have so much peace in my heart. I want my father to go to heaven with me. Thank you Fr. Casey for addressing this.
You’re a strong woman of God may he continue to bless you for following his scripture 🙏
You are one kind Soul and a true follower of Christ. God bless you always.🙏🙏🙏
Yikes, I really needed to hear this. I very recently found out that a man that I trusted and looked up to (I even called him uncle) sexually abused multiple girls and even raped someone I knew. It has caused so much pain and nearly torn my community apart. I’ve gone back and forth between trying to forgive and wanting to punch him in the face and when I try to pray for him it usually becomes something along the lines of “Lord help him to see how much pain he caused and feel guilty”. At this point I’ve just been asking the Lord to help me want to forgive.
That’s a great start & prayer for him. If you can refrain from hate & pray for his repentance, what more do you need to do to love him? You can yearn for justice, nothing wrong with that just not revenge.
and what do you feel towards the victims? are you there for them, pray for them? do you do anything for them? dont let him become the main victim of his actions towards others, taking center stage. he is not that important. why not let him go, and give all the time you would spend on him, on his victims.
@@TrixRNthis is what I was thinking. Praying for him to understand the harm he has caused and feel guilty is so very close to praying for his repentance and salvation. What a mercy for his soul! If the best you can do right now is pray to be able to forgive, that's okay. God will honor your desire to please him; I cannot imagine that this is a prayer that will go unanswered, especially if you persevere. ❤
@@uselessstrawberry737 You nailed it. It seems like the needs of the victims always get ignored.
For what it’s worth praying for humans to have empathy for others and to recognize their intentional actions caused isn’t a bad thing… From a Catholic perspective this would ideally cause him to have atonement and seek the Sacrament of Reconciliation for his sins. May God send him to the priest who can stomach such sins-maybe that’s why priests avoid having people go into detail.
Regardless, I pray you keep your children away from him.
God I am a sinner... help me to love my enemies... who am I to condemn
Who am I to condemn. Most important line. Besides the fact you’re repenting my fellow brother.
Here's a little orthodox prayer we use in our church.
"Lord Jesus Christ,son of God,have mercy on me,a sinner."
People who do hideous things should not be hated and we should pray for them. On the other hand, we should defend against him and defend society against him (or her). Part of that, is protecting them from being harmed unjustly.
Thank you for making this. This is the hardest teaching for me to follow. There are days when I can't even forgive someone and show mercy for even the smallest slight-let alone something as horrific as this. I've realized I can be very inpatient. That said, I do think there is something within all of us that craves justice, but In those moments I try to remind myself that no one is getting away with anything, including me! Hurt people hurt people, and unless those people grow they will continue to hurt themselves and others. Whenever I've treated someone badly out of anger or in patience, I regret it. In those moments I am separated from God,-which is Hell. We are all punished by our sins-justice takes care of itself, at least to an extend. some call it Karma. But God craves restorative justice. When we fall off course, he wants us back. If he does truly "punish," I think its always for the sake of discipline-to help us grow towards Him. Thoughts?
Fr Casey I was one of those on your Twitter post who said I had no sympathy. That was me being in the heat of the moment. I’ve since calmed down.
Very human. When we had killers break into a home in CT and kill 2 teens and their mom, many wanted death, but they got life. I asked an older priest if I should pray for them too and he said in confession to concentrate on family. I think that was his human, raw moment. We try to rise above it.
Whilst I largly agree with you, I think it's important to understand how the victims feel, and not judge them for feeling angry or hateful towards those who have greatly wronged them.
I'm a CSA and DV survivor. For the longest time I wanted to hurt the people who had hurt me. I wanted them to suffer like they made me suffer. One day I spoke to a dear cousin of mine, a theologian and a former priest himself, and he said that loving our enemies doesn't necessarily holding love for them in our hearts; sometimes it means giving up the hate we hold there instead. Those words helped me start on my path to healing, and I think of them whenever I hear of stories of monsters like this guy
The problem is if that hate gets worse and it leads to someone taking the law into their own hands it can cause even more trouble for themselves. For maybe a sense of momentarily pleasure if that person even experiences it, but a prison sentence awaits.
Forgiveness doesn't mean Forgive and Forget, it is just important to just Forgive.
This is hard, but this is GOSPEL! Thank you, Father!
Give it up for the preacher. This guy is awesome🤗
Like in the time of Jesus Himself: ''Therefore, when many of his disciples heard this [about Eucharist: ''I am the true bread that came down from heaven''] they said 'This teaching is hard. Who can accept it?' '' John 6:60
Not that there are true Christians and fake Christians, but this is one of the ways I think we can see who has actually understood the message and who hasn't. I agree 100% with everything you said, and so should every Christian.
Oh, you tackled a tough one here, Fr. Casey! Kudos to you! I struggled with this teaching for many years. Let's face it--sins of others make us angry, whether they're committed against us directly or not. What got me past it was realizing that my anger was just another offense to God, and hadn't He suffered enough already? Hard as it is to do, after praying for the victims, I pray for redemption of the sinner, not for them so much, but for God; that the offense to Him is removed by the sinner's repentance. Maybe it's a selfish thing, but to me, what matters to God matters to me, regardless of whether I understand it. I leave judgement to Him. He's much better at it than I'll ever be! 😉🙏✝
@@michaelmurdock4607Even St. Paul got his redemption
Righteous anger (within reason) isn't necessarily bad. Sounds like you handled the situation admirably.
Thanks! It took a while!! 😅@@TacticalTerry
Thank you, Fr.
I saw your Twitter post on this and I am most grateful that you have also posted a UA-cam video.
You are so right in everything you say in this video, and you broached the topic with all the appropriate sensitivity and caveats.
My heart sinks whenever I hear people who claim to be Catholic or Christian and they exhibit a lust for blood, a thirst for vengeance. We can be horrified by a crime, a sin, and yet still not hunger for equal or greater suffering to be visited on the perpetrator.
It isn't easy, especially when you or a loved one has been the victim. But such an attitude only damages ourselves and our relationship with God. It ossifies our heart, and that never draws us closer to the God that is love - it always damages and destroys that relationship.
Any punishment that is given out by humans - parents, teachers, courts, whatever - should never be about revenge or "payback". it must be about protection for society from criminal acts, about reform of the criminal and maybe about deterance - though I am still working on that one.
It does not mean that we remain indifferent to crimes. It does not mean that we don't share viscerally in the horror of abuse.
But it does mean that we try to immitate Christ.
And, in case anyone out there is sharpening their knives for me, I speak as a survivor of abuse.
@@sergesavard636 I am hoping that that is a humorous quip!
@sergesavard636 Well, I'm not sure about never, but I will agree with not always. And it depends on what you mean by justice. Nasser will not leave prison alive.
The pain and the damage that he inflicted remains, but the point that Fr Casey is making is that even Nasser's status, his dignity as a creature of the Almighty must be maintained and that a hunger for revenge doesn't actually do anyone any good.
As a Buddhist, I found this video so fascinating and heartwarming. Although our beliefs do not involve any God(s), Buddhists arrive at this same outcome in a different, yet similar way. In Buddhism we have a concept known as Metta (in English, "loving kindness"), and the Buddha taught that no matter how someone else treats you or others, even if they cause you grievous harm, we should subdue any feelings of hatred and instead practice metta towards them as we do for all other beings. At first, it seems really difficult or even impossible to practice kindness and good will towards those who have wronged us so severely, but the Buddha did not mean that this is something we can just do overnight; with time and continuous practice, we can one day reach this point. There's a wonderful sutta (one of our types of scriptures) that explains how we can work our way up to it, that I often like to remember. To paraphrase it:
When you feel hatred arise, instead develop good will and kindness towards that person.
If you cannot do that, instead develop compassion for that person.
If you cannot do that, instead develop neutral feelings towards that person.
If you cannot do that, instead pay no mind or attention to that person at all.
If you cannot do that, instead focus on yourself, and remember that letting hatred dwell inside you will only make you feel worse. So subdue your hatred for the benefit of yourself, not for the benefit of the other person.
_(Aghatavinaya Sutta, Anguttara Nikaya 5.161)_
Videos like this exemplify why I love learning about religions other than my own. Thank you Fr Casey!
@kingbradley9066 I am also Theravadin, thanks in part to the wonderful Thai people! I was raised in a very atheist, anti-religious Australian family, but lived in Thailand for a while as a teenager where I was introduced to Buddhism. As I grew up and understood more about myself, I felt very called to Buddhism; it's hard to describe, but I feel like it filled a hole in my life that had thus far been empty. After learning a lot about the many different branches, I decided that Theravada aligned most closely with my own beliefs. I'm 28 now and have been practising for 10 years, and I will never look back :)
I turned away from Buddhism because I couldn't love everybody and didn't believe everyone is good.
My Dad always said "If any of us makes it to Heaven, he/she would be astonished of which people we´ll meet there: Usual sinners who repented and suddenly a face we couldn´t imagine seeing here (in the magnitude of Hitler or Stalin) because he/she became aware of his/her sins, asking for forgiveness just before death". My Dad is still alive and for many years, I didn´t understand these words. Now at 43, I do. Kind regards from Easrern Austria, Mathew
I hope his victims are doing okay and this doesn't trigger another round of pain in them.
This reflection is (rightly) focused mostly on the fundamental principle that loving the worst of enemies never justifies rejoicing in their misfortunes. Meanwhile, let’s remember that “loving our enemy” does not equal condoning the enemy’s hurtful deeds, nor allowing evil to happen without consequences. That’s not love either. You briefly touch on that, yet I’m sure many will benefit from deeper look. I look forward to that Part 2 if this reflection.
The hardest ones to love are the ones we see or remember and have done us wrong personally…it’s easy to forget some face on the news…it’s much harder to love an enemy who has abused us or hurt us physically and emotionally directly…an abusive ex or parent or someone who hit us and disabled us or even killed our child or spouse in a dui incident or something less dramatic. We must learn to love that enemy also. Those are the hardest.
And yet another bullseye video by father Casey 🎯
Loving [or at least not-hating] your enemies is, indeed, one of the hardest things to do.
I think it's that people think mercy and justice are completely opposites. If purgatory is any indication, they go hand-in-hand.
I think we err when we think forgiveness is befriending the offender. It is not. It is merely treating them with respect, and allow them to go in peace in hopes they will find their own salvation. It took incredible courage to give this message, Father. Scripture supports you. Luke 6:37 suggests that we are forgiven how we are willing to forgive. Thank you for being a man of such courage, and God bless you.
Thanks for that
This opened my eyes and gave me a lot to pray about. Thank you for being gentle but firm while addressing such a difficult topic. May God bless you and your ministry!
Hate the sin not the sinner. Thank you Fr. Casey, this is a hard teaching but one we much learn if as country and world we are to recover the insanity that the world is spinning in.
Listening to this message today was the best thing that happened to me! Thanks so much! 🙏🏻
Dear Father Casey, you are so young and WISE; thank you for making this world a better place!👍🥰
What a beautiful video/teaching. Thank you for sharing this Father Casey.
Differentiating justice from vengeance on the plane of human affairs is hard, but I can believe that God discerns which deathbed conversions result from true repentance and which are motivated by an desire to secure freedom from consequences in the hereafter; therefore, ultimately, justice will be served.
I am reminded of a quote from Batman Begins when Rachel is talking to Bruce. "Justice is about harmony. Revenge is about you making yourself feel better."
May The Mighty Lord keep you with us as long as possible Father Casey.
Father, thank you. The moment I saw the title of this video, I KNEW I had to watch it. I KNEW you could enlighten me in this regard. I taught myself, a long time ago, not to pray for the wrath of God against my enemies. Rather, I pray for Him to help them. Truly, I thought this was enough. But, now I see that this was a step in the right direction. By no means is it where I want to stop working toward being as our Lord wishes us to be. When you stated that we are to love our enemies BECAUSE the Lord loves them - it hit me! Jesus died on the cross for the sins of ALL OF US - that includes my enemies. If He can make that kind of sacrifice, then I must honor that sacrifice and remember to love my enemies as well. Thank you Father, thank you for helping me to grow in Christ.
The absolute worst of the worst? Molesting or killing a child. That is probably the worst thing I can think of that somebody can do to another.
Keep it coming. Your work means so much.
The love and forgive everyone line has also contributed to abuse, even to child abuse within the church. What do you think the priests who protected child abusing priests thought they were doing? What do you think victims of spousal abuse think they're doing when they forgive endlessly and stick around for more abuse? Exactly that. This subject requires a great deal more time and detailed theological exposition to properly cover....much more than is possible within a ten minute video.
This is so true. My childhood priest molested a young boy. A letter was published that a bishop wrote to the boy encouraging him to be like God and forgive that priest and not so subtly implying that there was no need to get police involved because it’s better for the soul to respond with love and forgiveness. Pure manipulation.
Thank you, Father Casey, for this sobering reiteration of the Gospel message which is, at its core, about forgiveness. Our proclivity to seek revenge is so strong, and that is why the admonishment to "love ones enemies" is the hardest command for us to follow. That does not mean that we should not seek justice. Justice should redress the wrong when possible, reform the perpetrator, and should prevent future transgressions by the perpetrator. However, when exacting that justice goes beyond this to be some cathartic act born of inflicting suffering on the transgressor for our pleasure, that is when we crossed the Rubicon from justice to retribution. When taken that far, our actions damage us as much as it damages the offender.
Very well said. This is the same thing that I have encountered years ago. Anger can mask the goodness of our heart. When we are filled with anger, we spread it to other people and the chain reaction continues. Whenever I feel negative emotions I stop it by offering a short prayer. I ask for wisdom and the heart to forgive those who are causing me pain or other negative emotion.
Thank you for uploading this video.
Thank you Fr., for addressing tough topics and using them to catechism. You are right on. It reminds me of Corie Ten Boom encountering a former Nazi guard (who had abused her family in a concentration camp) and had become a Christian.
Demanding that people suffering psychological injuries forgive their abusers is abusive in itself. It is a boundary violation in the process of recovery. It is re-abusive. Don't do this. Instead care for people with these injuries, believe them, prioritize them and refuse to compromise in the safeguarding of children and vulnerable adults.
You nailed it 👏
Thanks.
No. Quite the contrary. Forgiveness helps, actually it seals, the healing process. You are right, though, that it cannot be DEMANDED. It must come from within, and it will generally take time. But it can and should be gently suggested, at an appropriate point during therapy..
You can't make someone do something they don't want to, so no, you can't demand, you can suggest. Because you will find peace in forgiveness, you would be doing it more so for yourself than your enemies if you look at it that way.
Thank you, Father. This is so, so important. It's heartbreaking what Larry Nassar did to all those women and girls, but it breaks my heart to hear what happened to him, too.
Amen brother!
Matt 6:12 - "And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors."
We forgive both to be forgiven and because we have been forgiven.
Eph 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
Eph 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
We forgive because bitterness and anger are destructive to our souls.
Rom 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.
Rom 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Rom 12:19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
Rom 12:20 On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
Rom 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
We forgive because vengeance does not belong to us and neither does justice - both belong to God and we are not Him!
So, this evangelical minister stands with you on that hill and I also would be willing to die there!
Amen. Daily rosaries are a great help. I've slacked off in the last month, I need to be more consistent. I pray God forgives me.
The same Jesus who spoke the words "love your enemies" also prescribed the death penalty for rapists. These are not contradictory positions nor is the latter abrogated by the former.
In what verse does he say this? I’m intrigued.
@@TitusCastiglione1503 Deuteronomy 22:25, see also Matthew 5:17.
@@JamesLewis98 I don’t see that that automatically proves your case….
Im kinda atheist but I do bekoebe in Love - and salvation through healing
and this video is a great speech about loving and seeing clearly the truth - that we all deserve to live a happy loving life, and that no one should suffer in vein
While a very hard thing to fully take into one's heart, you made it so much easier for it to be understood. As someone who has hated a lot of people over the years, all I can say is that at the end all that did is make me miserable. Mind you, I'm pretty young (24 y/o) and yet I've wasted a big chunk of my teenage years and early youth holding grudges against some family members and ex friends. In a way, I feel old. Hatred is a disease which torments one's days and nights. At the end you end up hating even the good things God throws in your way, making you feel lonely and empty. It's still hard, specially considering hatred and resentment was a big part of what I witnessed growing up. But I'm willing to finally let Christ heal my wounds and replace the evil thoughts which torments me with love, of which there can never be enough. Thank you Father.
Thank you for sharing this. I am not a Catholic, but an evangelical, and though I disagree with you on some theological matters, I’m right with you on this. We have value because of whose we are.
Anyone who hasn’t watched Rachel Denhollander‘s victim impact statement should do so. I’m paraphrasing her, but she says that God’s ability to forgive Larry is what makes the gospel of Christ so sweet. Because there is grace, hope, and mercy where none should be found. The Larry’s crimes are despicable, there is no sin too big for God to forgive.
@@sergesavard636 We don't "presume": it's stated in the Gospel. What we cannot "presume" is the ultimate destiny of the sinner's soul, but without doubt God's offering his mercy to him too. Then it's to him to accept and repent or to refuse and be damned.
Thank you Father Casey. I try really hard to follow the teachings but it is very difficult and I know there are times I fall short on this one and other teachings. But I do believe in treating people humanely and with dignity.
Maria Goretti … a saint. On her deathbed she forgave the man who killed her.
Her murderer imprisoned and let go. Alessandro Serenelli went on to become repentant and had an active life in the church. People are now petitioning for him to become a saint.
When I first was learning of this story it was horrifying. You would want him to spend his life in jail. What he did after was better for helping to save many others … and that made me realize that who am I to judge who gets forgiveness or not.
Even Jesus used Saul for his attacking the body. Paul went on to evangelize many gentiles which led to the rapid growth of the church. And it was not easy for him as he suffered while doing it.
In my opinion, one of our enemies who best exemplifies this principle is Nazi SS Lieutenant Colonel Herbert Kappler. He is shown in the excellent film "The Scarlet and the Black" where his role is played by the brilliant actor Christopher Plummer. Kappler was the head of police in Nazi-occupied Rome during the Second World War. He committed many heinous crimes, ranging from perpetrating the Ardeatine Massacre to deporting Jewish people to death camps.
Kappler was opposed by a priest based in Vatican City, Monsignor Hugh O'Flaherty, who was sent by Pope Pius XII to try to rescue victims of persecution. Thanks to O'Flaherty's brilliant use of disguises, he builds up an escape network that hides in the Vatican and/or smuggles across Allied lines Jewish people, escaped Allied prisoners of war and political prisoners of the Nazi regime. O'Flaherty's efforts come to the attention of Kappler, who unsuccessfully tries to assassinate him.
As Rome is being liberated by Allied Forces, Kappler is worried that his wife and children will be the victim of reprisals by Italian partisan forces. So he reaches out to his enemy, O'Flaherty, and asks him to rescue his family. O'Flaherty initially refuses this request.
After the war, Kappler is put on trial for Crimes Against Humanity and sentenced to life in prison. He learns that his wife and children were smuggled over the border to safety in Switzerland by O'Flaherty.
As the subsequent years go by, O'Flaherty visits Kappler in prison every month. 14 years later, in 1959, he repents and is baptized by O'Flaherty.
It is my opinion that Herbert Kappler does an excellent example of showing why Jesus commands us to love our enemies. Acts of love, such as rescuing his family and visiting him in prison, led him to repent of his sins and to be baptized. "As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that they turn from their ways and live." Ezekiel 33:11.
I was struggling with hate bitterness and resentment... But after listening to your whole video I must commend you and say thank you for clarity... This made a lot of sense and definitely, what Jesus would want us to do... So thank you!
I am in awe of families, parents, who forgive their child's killer, in part for religious reasons, but they also say that hate does nothing for their healing. The Amish forgave the man who shot their children in school and visited his wife. I tear up at the thought of it.
Thank you for this video. This kind of mercy, grace, compassion, and hope is exactly why I subscribed to this channel and why I always watch your videos right away. I really believe you’re making the world a better place
I have struggled with this concept for a while due to my own experience with this type of abuse as a child when I found out one of my abusers who had also abused my sister was sick and going to pass away soon I struggled to feel anything for him and I still feel pain because he was family and it made me upset seeing all my family mourn and pray for him but now 2 years later I find myself praying for him too and working through forgiving
He should expend his all life in jail so will not hurt anyone anymore.
We misconept „loving another“ it does not mean to treat others with romantic love or superficial kindness but to be honest and be a part of an environment in which they can repent and grow.
1. I can imagine WAY worse than what this guy did.
2. I don’t feel good about anybody getting stabbed.
This is very helpful. The path of the least resistance leads to nowhere. Mathew 7 verse 1 to 6 (I have read it in the Dutch Bible, so I don’t know the exact English translation) says that we shall not judge. This verses where very helpful to me in this same regard.
I think we have all heard about the need to love our enemies at some point from the pulpit. But I think the complexity of forgiveness needs to be shared.
I work with abuse victims who stay in abusive relationships because they interpret this passage as needing to constantly “forgive” their abuser after each abuse, n hence their “forgiveness” allows the abuse to continue. Forgiveness doesn’t mean we allow people to continue hurting us.
Forgiveness is a process n a journey. I had a teen once come up to me to ask me to pray for her to forgive her father who she had just discovered the week before had another family outside her own. She was trying to jump to forgiveness n struggling to forgive because it was still so raw n she wouldn’t give herself permission to acknowledge that she is angry with her father, that she feels hurt n betrayed, n allowing Jesus to hold that. It is ok that forgiveness takes time, n we don’t need to expect ourselves to be able to do it instantly, n we don’t need to beat ourselves up if we can’t.
N the last thing I learnt… is that forgiveness is grace. It is something that can only be done with the grace of God n not on our own. When I was in my late teens, I was emotionally, mentally n sexual abused almost daily by a leader from my church community for over three years. Took me over 15 years after to have the courage to make a police report but the case was dropped due to lack of evidence (as is the case of many sexual assault… it’s his word against yours). I wanted “vengeance”. I wanted him to rot in jail because of what he did to me, n how I continue to struggle with the psychological damage of what he did to me, even till today. But I couldn’t even get that. N I would go for confession each month n tell my confessor that I still can’t forgive him. N one day my confessor just said: if u can’t forgive then don’t. N my spiritual director told me that forgiveness is a grace from God, not something I can try to do on my own. N so, just offer that desire to God, n pray for the grace, rather than try to do it on my own.
I eventually saw a documentary on the inhuman conditions of prison, n I realised that despite what he did to me, I didn’t desire him to go through that. N I dun desire that he be thrown in hell either. But I wished that he at least acknowledged how much pain he caused me (post abuse, i went into severe depression, I have over 200 cuts n 100 stitches, n attempted suicide 3 times). n was at least sorry. Took me over 20 years after the abuse to now come to the point that I dun even need him to be sorry. (Jesus forgave the people who killed him from the cross, even when they weren’t sorry… at least not at the point of the crucifixion). I can now say that I can go on living my life, even if he is never sorry. The damage he did has controlled my life for so long, but i don’t want to let him control it anymore. But all of this was a journey of over 20 years… n only by the grace of God.
I guess I would love to hear your story Fr Casey, of how u struggled with forgiving your enemy. Cos it is easy to preach from a “theoretical” point of view. But living it, is a different story. N maybe it can help people who struggle to forgive to be more gentle with themselves n rely on the grace of God.
A decade ago, my brother was killed. The man who did it did everything in his power to avoid consequences for his actions and the court only gave him a slap on the wrist. I still have nightmares, and general anxiety, and I currently still need to take therapy and antidepressants. My parents didn't do so great either. I can't forgive this man. I can't love him. I don't have it in me to do that, and I don't believe I have the right to grant forgiveness on behalf of someone else. The best I can do is be indifferent to him, live as though he died that day. Anything more would tear my heart about and feel like a betrayal of my dead brother. I've stopped saying the lord's prayer because of the 'as we forgive those who trespass against us' part - I'm not going to lie to God.
Father Casey, you came very close to saying "You're not a Christain if you don't love and forgive your enemies." I don't know if that's what you meant, but it's what you said. I hope you weren't telling me that I'm going to Hell, or that I should leave the church. Not even if you think I should, though I hope that's not what you think.
I don't know what the point of my comment is. Just that some of the discourse around 'forgiveness' make it feel like only the inflictor of harm needs comforting and help, and that the victim of it need to provide. At times, the idea of 'forgiveness' can feel like a crudgel to brute-force social harmony more than anything else.
I think this is one of the most difficult lessons in this life. I also struggle with it. If I am in anger, that's what I am offering to God and myself at that moment. Not good.
Forgiveness is not for the murderer's sake, it is for yours.
Just keep trying
Much love ❤🕊🙏
Hate will eat you. Letting go of it is hard, but wise.
@@isoldam How do you define hate? If it's an active emotional state, then I very rarely hate others. I've found that, the easiest way to avoid hating someone, is to be physically away from them and to focus my mental energy elsewhere.
I was abused when I was child frm molested in a young child until with a friend to use me in darkness but instead of hate them I forgive the and I go confession and pray and I starting forgive my self and it was beautiful peace I get forgive people who hurt me
Well said Father Casey.
Thank you for this very needed video.
Elizabeth from NC
I basically agree with everything you said here. I myself had some of the same vengeful thoughts as many other people did and I know I was thinking wrong.
I do think there is a little room for nuance here. To give an example from my own life a few years ago someone close to my family was addicted to drugs and abusing his kids. Not in the same way Larry Nassar was. He was hitting them and leaving marks often enough that the family and the school started to notice.
A few friends and I preyed about it and what we did wasn’t perfect, but was effective. I got aggressive with him… basically bullying him and told him if he hits the kids I’d hit him. Then we all dragged him to 12 step meeting sometimes kicking and screaming. It was a difficult time. Life for him and those kids has gotten much better since.
Of course stabbing people is wrong. Of course! It’s crazy to me that it even needs to be said. However tough love in situations like these is often necessary and more effective than police or jail.
“It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble.”
Luke 17:2
👏🏻 yeah let’s debate on how to love our enemies!!
This will always be the hardest teaching to uphold. I'm always dismayed at the crowing you find in relatively liberal places (I use Reddit for example) when news stories about rapists/paedophiles etc. getting beaten up, stabbed etc. in prison get posted.
Look, i get it. They've committed horrendous crimes. They deserve to be imprisoned. But we did not sentence them to torture. And we should not be condoning random criminals doling out such punishments arbitrarily. We wither believe in human dignity or we don't.
Thanks for the video. It's a hill worth dying on. We do not for ONE SECOND condone these criminals behaviour. They committed heinous crimes, and deserve their sentences. But they still have rights. They still habe dignity. And we should try to love them.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”
Romans 12:19
Yeah, well, I want to see some major league repaying in this life, not just in the afterlife.
Why would Jesus say what he did in Matthew 26:52 Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place: for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword.
Shouldn't Jesus have said something like "He who take the sword will be loved and forgiven by man and then God will exact vengeance later if God sees it fit"?
@@br.mJesus is forbidding St. Peter from disobeying the law, as well as chastising him from interfering with his mission.
@@TitusCastiglione1503 no
@@br.m …. ok, well “no” right back at you.
Brother, I almost turned this video off, but Im glad I didnt. It changed my life! Thank you!
"What if we say to the people who hurt us _'I know you hurt me but I am going to show you love. anyway. I am going to let my heart break for you because you don't only realize how lost you are. It is not hate I feel for you but sadness. You are worth so much more than this.'_ If we were to act like this, it is possible we could change their entire world. We free them from the chains that bind them. Show them a completely different way of living."
This can be strong healing and powerful. It can also make you stronger as a person.
But it needs to be tempered with caution.
There are people with illnesses, for example, psychopathy that are not amenable to this and will instead devour you and your family.
Not in the abstract but in real life.
I have met evil people.
This is a thought provoking video. My key thought is I appreciate that invitation, "Catholics, if you're going to say these things can you also admit you disagree with Jesus?" My question is, is there room in the church for those who, in their journey, have periods of disagreeing with Jesus? All too often I see a desire for conformity at the earliest possible opportunity and it often robs people of an organic faith journey in which they wrestle, grapple and question the faith as any critically thinking adult ought to. Can we reach a point as a church where we give people the space to disagree with Jesus for a time and not disregard them, invalidate them or tarnish them with a reputation that they're untrustworthy as a Catholic?
Another great video, Father. I would enjoy hearing your thoughts in a new video on the way that we handle how the governors of Texas and Florida treat immigrants and refugees. Especially since Jesus was a brown skinned middle eastern refugee with a teenage mother.
Thank you Father Casey. I needed your words.
It is indeed a hard teaching, but who would we be to refuse it 🙏
I’ll pray for you guys as I hope we all pray for each other
Forgiveness is the hardest thing to do and I struggle a lot in this space. Hearing the verse from Matthew, it just solidified that I have no option but to strive to always forgive, no matter how difficult.
You have understood a profound truth. Yes extending forgiveness is very hard and requires a decision of our will sometimes on a daily basis. We may need to go further and forgive hourly because unlike our God we cannot forget the offense. Forgiveness is a process and the result is you will be setting yourself free.
I would love to like this video a hundred times over. Well said. Amen.
Thank you for this teaching! I'm so disappointed in my brothers when they make weird exceptions to "love your enemy."
When I listen to the phrase "love your enemy", I don't think the best interpretation is "don't do anything against your enemies, as it constitutes vengeance". If the enemies in question are evil, they shall certainly be opposed as we should, of course, be opposed to evil. At the same time, however, this opposition shouldn't be done from a place of hate but from one of love. We hate evil, and love evil-doers as we shall will their good (communion with God), but love obviously doesn't mean people shouldn't face consequences or that these consequences are purely utilitarian. If a child misbehaves, his mother loves him no less if she punishes him for it, and this is not vengeance or hate in any way; retribution is not the same as vengeance.
For those reasons, I think it is possible for a catholic to ultimately support policies such as the death penalty, which, mind you, have only been condemned recently. Moreover, Pope Benedict XVI said that diversity of opinion was allowed on this subject (while not allowed on topics like euthanasia and abortion).
I always believed in karma. What goes around will come around. It means that I want to get even on what others did badly on me. And that's pure evil. But when I watched this video, I realized that I was always wrong. Cursing my enemy is also committing a sin. Thank you for this inspiring video. With this, I know God is trying to talk to me.
I believe in the biblical karma what you sow is what your reap
@@dolphjan6267 very true
Its not karma. Its God himself doing that
Catholics don’t believe in karma , in any sense of the word. It contradicts our faith and concept of Grace. most people that do believe in karma in Western society just use it as an excuse to be petty or illicit revenge:
“Cutting to the point, there’s no such a thing as karma. No one believes in it, including those Westerners who say they believe in it. If they did, they wouldn’t complain when they experience pain or inconvenience. According to karmic theory, whatever happens to an individual is what he deserves. A person who truly believes in karma wouldn’t complain about anything in life. They also wouldn’t celebrate anything ― they would just accept everything that came their way with grim aplomb.”
“1. Karma is essentially a fatalistic and deterministic philosophy. It neither accepts questions nor provides answers but merely urges acceptance. It teaches that one can’t escape a mechanistic universe. It’s essentially a passive system not suited for cultures that recognize individual moral responsibility.
2. If karma were actually a function or mechanism built into the fabric of the cosmos like the Universal Constant, gravity (or the other three Fundamental Forces of Nature) or time’s unidirectionality, then scientists would have been able to identify it by now.
3. If karma is built into the physical structure of the universe, as it’s claimed, it is essentially an anti-spiritual force like gravity or inertia. Physical things without consciousness can’t lend themselves to spirituality, nor can something lacking consciousness decide what is and what isn’t good. And without a moral sense, how can karma then understand what is justice let alone dispense justice? Further, to dispense justice, karma would have to be in control of the physical and emotional aspect of the entire universe.
4. Karma recognizes only its own standard of morality and justice, but which one is it? Who is at fault: the Muslim terrorist who kills thousands of Iraqi Christians and Yazidi, or the Christians and Yazidi who’ve apparently done something so horrible as to deserve such treatment? It sounds like an explanation that explains nothing.
9. If karma is in charge of the universe and it can control the minds and hearts of those around us as it dispenses cosmic justice on all sentient beings everywhere and throughout all of time, it would mean there was no such a thing as free will because we all merely tools at the disposal of karma.
10. How does karma understand what is moral and just let alone dispense justice? To dispense justice, karma would have to then be in control of the entire physical and emotional aspect of the entire universe. Thus, a spirituality based on karma is fundamentally not a spirituality. It’s merely a science. And sciences can be demonstrated objectively and tested. Karma is none of these things.
11. Virtue isn’t possible within a karmic system. In such a system, one is “virtuous” because of one’s previous lifetimes experience, not because of God’s grace or perseverance.
13. Karma teaches, “good things happen to good people, and bad things happen to bad people.” This is nonsense and very judgmental. Those who bully children act unjustly. Children aren’t bullied because they are immoral. Bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people. The sun shines and the rain falls upon the good and wicked alike. (Matthew 5:45)
14. My pet peeve in dealing with the karmically-inclined is their sheer ignorance of Jesus and Christianity. “Jesus believed in karma and taught it!” they’d cry, desperate to win an unwinnable argument. Jesus not only didn’t teach karma but railed against those who believed in it. When a group of Jews who were executed by Pontius Pilate are accused of having been evil, Jesus says, “Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered in this way? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. Or those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them: do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who lived in Jerusalem? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish” (Luke 13:2-5).
15. An impersonal karma is a bit anti-climactic. Human consciousness, morality and free will are inexplicable mysteries of the universe and make human beings exceptional. They point to a Creator who is outside of this materialist plane of existence. But, according to those who believe in karma, they are second rate to some mechanical mechanism built into universe. What created our magnificent and exceptional human selves? Can karma ― something without a soul or will or consciousness ― create a soul, a will or a consciousness? That seems unlikely in the face of it.”-National Catholic Register
“A karmic approach says that, by a cosmic spiritual law, we are punished or rewarded according to our moral activities. If we do bad things, we will suffer, either in this life or a life to come. And if we do good things, we will be rewarded, again either here or in the hereafter. Karma might not be immediate, as is the law of gravity (remember John Lennon’s playful song “Instant Karma”), but in the long run, people are rewarded or punished according to merit. And this satisfies our sense of fairness and justice.
Now a religion of grace is different. It teaches that all people are sinners and hence deserving of punishment, but that God, out of sheer generosity, gives them what they don’t deserve. Think of one of the most popular lines in Christian poetry: “Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me.” In terms of a karmic religion, wretches deserve a wretched fate, and it would be unfair for wicked people to be given a great gift. But devotees of a religion of grace exult in this generosity.”- The Catholic World Report
From 🇸🇬 Singapore,Fr, like most, I too stand in the precipice of judging and forgiving those who have hurt us and are hurting us. We can avoid such people but what if we cannot and for the sake of family, we do or say the unthinkable is that wrong? The other extreme in NOT saying or doing anything is being indifferent. Being a Catholic Christian is a hard and difficult road. May the precious blood of Jesus wash over us.🙏🏼
It's difficult for me to effectively communicate this position when I'm talking to people who themselves have been victims of abuse or other similar traumatic events. I sometimes feel like I'm making light of their suffering
Please, continue to talk on this topic. You articulate the topic of forgiving our enemies well.
"Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12:17-21
I really appreciate this one, Father Casey. I know so many people just think it's okay to hate someone because of their past or their beliefs. I struggle with hating people on the wrong side of history and morality. But I do my best to forgive everyone because I want them to forgive me. I want them to love me. So, I try to love them. As He loves me. It's hard to get people to understand that sometimes.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion have mercy on us and on the whole world.
There are many things I cannot agree with Catholics on, but the importance of not letting violence perpetuate a cycle of violence is one of those I can agree with. The question I always face is, how to ensure the marginalised who have faced violent repression are not further marginalised by a lack of justice? Telling them nit to be angry with their oppressors could be seen ask asking them to be complicit in their repression.
He does deserve all the bad that's coming his way. That is a fact. The question is - should he get it? No. That's the Christian response.
That's the point of Christianity, that as sinners we deserve everything crashing upon our heads. It's just that God has called us to not dispense judgement that belongs to Him. Mostly because we have to start with ourselves.
Honestly I think one of the biggest moral dilemmas comes in the case of Gary Plauche. His preteen son was rxxed by his soccer coach. Following the coach’s capture by law enforcement, he was being extradited, and at the airport after just having landed, Plauche shxt the coach in the head killing him. Plauche got away with a slap on the wrist because the judge ruled he wasn’t likely to murder again and this was special circumstances.
As a Catholic I obviously believe that all human life has value and that killing someone when not absolutely necessary to defend oneself/others is wrong. That being said, I don’t know what decision I would’ve made if I were Gary Plauche and I had to ability to get the guy who rxxed my son.
Real forgiveness is wanting everyone to be in heaven with us.
This really touched my heart. Thank you ❤
The story of Saint Maria Goretti is very relevant to this situation.
“Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement.” - Gandalf
I don't find any joy in knowing that another human being is suffering. It is wrong for the prisoner to attack this person, regardless of what he has done.
Great commentary. As you were explaining, I was thinking also of my thoughts on the matter and what my comments would be. By the end of the video, you had made all my points for me except one. Beyond what you talked about loving our enemies and such, we shouldn't be happy when a person who has done evil things dies because we also should hope that they will repent before their time is up. I know this coach didn't die, but I was thinking of the folks dancing in the street celebrating when Bin Laden died or the folks who cheer when famous killers like Ted Bundy are executed. I admit, I have less sadness for the loss of those who have done great evil than when a good person dies, but it should never be a time of rejoicing.
I always assumed that it wasn't rejoicing that someone died so much as the relief that all of those who are still alive are now safe from a threat that couldn't or wouldn't be controlled.
what you say is RIGHT and JUST as we say during the Mass, my brother. thanks for this precious video from South Korea :-)
How I feel about that: I've heard before that people who abuse children, especially sexually, often become the targets of violence in prison. The reason is that many of the people there were also victims of abuse, and they know that's part of the reason why their lives have turned out horribly. They were the victims of people who could not or would not control their worst impulses, and they themselves lack the ability to control their own impulses as they have responded to that treatment and other circumstances throughout their lives. They may not longer be able to reach the people who once hurt them, but if they're in reach of someone very like that, they lash out at them in the way they wish they could at the people who hurt them. It's not a happy thing, but it's an understandable and predictable thing. It's not about anybody being deserving or undeserving of anything. It's about the natures of the people involved.
Maybe Nassar couldn't help himself, couldn't stop himself from doing what he did, if he ever tried in the first place, but maybe the person who attacked him also couldn't stop himself from doing what he did because of his own mental defects/damage. According to the reports of the incident, the guy who attacked Nassar did it because Nassar was making lewd comments while watching women's sports. Nassar has not learned from his experiences or maybe lacks the capacity to ever learn, and the guy who stabbed him probably hasn't learned anything from whatever it was that originally sent him to prison or has no capacity to stop himself when provoked. When you really think about it, if either of the two people involved had the mental capacity for impulse control, neither one of them would have been in the place they were - in jail for their crimes - when this incident took place.
In the end, it just speaks to the true natures of the people involved, which are probably more similar to each other in certain respects than either of them would want to consider. They were both being what they are, brought to the same place by the choices each of them made, based on their own inner natures. They were both there specifically because neither one of them is functional out in society unsupervised. Knowing that, my main concern is, where were the people who were supposed to be watching them, the ones who are supposed to know better and be in control, people who are being paid specifically to police the people who can't police themselves? I'm never going to feel the warm fuzzies for anyone like Nassar, but you don't have to love someone in the warm sense to do your basic duty by them, and some days, especially with some people like this, that might be the best any of his fellow humans could do and all that might be required at that particular moment.
Thanks for that
The righteous will rejoice when he sees the vengeance;
He will wash his feet in the blood of the wicked. - Psalm 58:10
Before Christs teaching. And only one aspect of the Mosaic teachings. The call for Mercy was there also.
@@kathebridges4736 Christ very well taught condemnation of the wicked. Doesn’t matter if it was before Christs teachings because he’s God and he is the word of God. Mercy and justice, you can’t have justice without mercy. It’s two sides you have to take into account.
@@elizabethschuster6420 But not by us. By God.
@@Laurelin70 That verse refers specifically to God's vengeance, there's no need to object.
Everyone is guilty of being wicked especially the ones who think they’re good or righteous they’re the most wicked
YES YOU MUST SEE AND UNDERSTAND THAT THEY ARE HURTING AND LOST THEY KNOW NOT THE KNOWLEDGE YOU HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH
You really have some great points man!!!❤
Reminds me of the parable of the unforgiving servant. Forgiveness is supposed to flow from God through each of us and onto the next person. It doesn't just stop when it comes from God to us. Like a mountain stream, it has to be able to flow or else it gets stagnant. When praying it may be helpful to think of one famous person who has done something truly bad, and spend some time praying for their repentance and salvation. There's no shortage of people to pray for in this world.
I wish abusers and rapists could feel what their victims felt, not because it would be a punishment, though it would be, but how could you ever hurt someone deliberately again if you knew you would be forced to feel the pain they felt.