How to Love Someone that is Hard to Love
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- Опубліковано 17 тра 2022
- "Love your neighbor as yourself." We all know the drill. Jesus calls us to love even our enemies. But loving people can be so HARD.
Today Fr. Mike offers us some 3 practical tips and a word of challenge to lean into loving those we find difficult to love and care for.
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Christ loved us when we were unlovable, so let us strive to love _especially_ the unlovable. 🙏❤️🙏
Amen!
I believe this. The people I love the most have also hurt me the most (unwittingly). But I know that our suffering is meritorious and there is no need to whine or complain about it. St. Francis de Sales, pray for me! 🙏🏼🕊️
"Love is a one way street. Relationships are two way streets."
This line can legit can change my life.
Right on, A.D. 2023 A.D. , it's nice to have a reliable source. So refreshing to get an accurate solution to such an important life mucking problem. Amen, go Fatherhood!! A D. Father time, mature Agape Love source!
How is love a one way street??? You have to love to have relationships and friendship too?? So how do you love one way???
@@dennismagee9555 Hey Dennis. The immediate thing I thought of is a mom and a son that I know. The son falls away and never contacts or shows love. However, the mom is ceaseless in the giving of her love. They aren’t having much of a relationship (it’s not two ways) but the mom never stops praying, calling, and asking about her child (one way). Hope that helps.
This is amazing, I just had a big fight with my mother who is an incredibly difficult person. Please pray for me it is hard to love her sometimes.
I’m pretty sure she knows it too. Sad.
Love her anyway, as Jesus loves you!
@Max Kolbe thank you.
Funnily enough, I just had a massive fight with my mother who is also difficult. Praying for you and all those in similar situations.
I will pray. I know how you feel, as I feel the same sometimes. I know it can be very hard. May God bless you and her both and create in her a clean heart. Some Scripture: 2 Timothy 2:24-25: “And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kindly to every one, an apt teacher, forbearing, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant that they will repent and come to know the truth…”
The one who bites or barks, who behaves in an unloving way, is in pain, and will also likely be feeling separate from love, peace, worthiness or a sense of safety - perhaps, all of these. Unloving behaviour is a revelation as to what is UNSEEN, what is being FELT and experienced within. Thus, behaviour helps make what is invisible to the eye, VISIBLE. The one who has behaved in an unloving or mean way, should not be condemned and judged as "less than human" or not worthy of Love. In fact, it is they who are most worthy of Love, which is by virtue of the reality that their NEED for Love is greatest. It has become clear to me that the person behaving in an unloving way is, in their pain and unbearable suffering, ALLOWING others to see this - to see the Truth of their inner world - in the hope that they receive the help - the love, support, connection and the lessening of their suffering - that they indeed need 🌱
Meanness is not an indication of "badness" within a person... Rather, meanness *reveals* pain. Mean Means Pain 🌱 Moreover, at its core... every unloving behaviour is a Call for Love 🙌🏽🕊
If you read this... God loves you unconditionally and has got you, my friend 🌱
This is the best statement. I hope you don’t mind that I share this. I needed to see this today. Thanking the Father for leading you to share it. ❤️
Thank you David for pointing this out. My older sister hated me for being unpleasant/mean when we were growing up. I wasn't bad but just in pain with constant asthma attacks unable to breath.
Thank you. This is what I needed to read. Thank you. God bless you.
I have been going through a tough time personally, i have prayed day and night for over a year now for some sort of sign. I truly believe this is the sign i had been needing, i see it loud and clear. God is so good.
Good luck, Start where your at-I’ve been told this pertaining to studying God and his word.
Does that mean that we're the bigger person, we get to set boundaries and dismiss the other person in our lives?
Setting boundaries is not to dismiss people but to include people in a way that’s manageable
Working in customer service is always a test of my charity for sure😂
Oh I’m sure. So sorry. I really try to be as kind and patient with a smile as possible.sometimes they’re so upset or turned off with their protective mask the service representative is rather cold. It’s a back and forth sometimes.
You think that’s bad, try nursing! 😉
@@vtomc oh man, I can’t imagine!!
@vtomc how many people shout at you,"the customer is always right" or get you fired because you didn't have a smile plastered on your face?(I may have been thinking about bills or argument with spouse). Nurses deserve much praise. 🎉❤
Please pray for my daughter who is hard to love 💕 She has a heart of stone and is avoiding to communicate with her family. When all is said and done, I can only pray for her conversion of heart. May God grant her peace and love. Amen 🙏🏻
Praying
I get it, i am in the same situation. Bless you!
I know how that is… same issue here but I can love & forgive them by willing to wish them all the good of God’s blessings But maintain strict Boundaries! 🙏👀❤️
Maybe she’s hurt by something and needs help healing and feeling safe to live freely again
I have a difficult time with my brother. He never stops talking to let others say anything. He complains almost every single day. If we say anything to him about carrying his cross and/or being more positive or we disagree with him, he snaps. The family doesn't want to be around him or lands up on bad terms because he talks and complains too much and, is a know it all. Even though I try so hard and pray so much for him, he seems to be one of my heaviest crosses. God help us. ✝️
We may have the same brother😂😂
I'm with you and completely understand where you are coming from.
As a recovering chronic complainer, just want to say that my complaining is just a desire to be seen and heard. Good on you for praying for him. Keep fighting the good fight!
I have a husband like your brother:( his controlling bad attitude wanted his views listened to and hurd only
I’m separated from now! And I pray for him! I can’t live with No love and no good healthy communication.
I’m greatful to god for me to be able to life away from him and have peace! 🙏🏼🙏🏼✝️
My husband and I separated. I married a difficult person who is difficult in many ways. I love him and I don’t always understand how to properly love him. My husband made some serious mistakes in our marriage and as a result of all this, I pray like crazy. My husband has turned to lies and cheating because of his personal problems to love. I put my foot down and we’re getting help but it’s not easy. It’s not easy dealing someone who struggles with love. God loves us and I understand it all. The truth has set me free but it hasn’t set my husband free. Prayers! I will practice learning to love him more. Hoping God will help his heart. ❤
Prayers for you 🙏 similar situation
"We Are Always Definitively LOVED by God!!"
I looked up the word DEFINITIVELY ~it means, in a way that is ❣️Definite, ❣️Complete,
❣️Final, or ❣️Absolute! 🙌 WOW!! Soo Beautiful to think about! Thank You Father Mike for this reflection!!
When I heard "definitively" I thought of the word "defining," as in her life now being defined by receiving his love - (and so extending, appropriately boundaried or more fully, depending?) - purely, ;in him.
Dear Father Mike: I have tried for many years tolerating speaking with my brother who is ten years older than me. He’s abrasive and selfish and cruel and abusive. I finally struggled to put up boundaries several times which he overstepped shamelessly and I finally told him he can not speak to me that way. He swore at me and said something vile and told me to never speak to him again. He’s blocked me from reaching him. He’s way too toxic for me so all I can do is to pray for him. I cannot be abused by his narcissistic personality anymore.
Agree with you. I have a husband like that:( I’m separated from him now!
I pray for him . I’m pray you do your inner healing! I’m doing that now. The work begins with me😃
A.D. 2023 A.D. , ask if 2023 is a random number! ..he's free to disagree!
Amazing.
A relationship is a two-way street.
But Love is a one-way street. You just love.
Hey everyone I have important tests coming up this week could you all please pray for me to do well and answer to the best of my ability. Thanks very much🙏✝️ Mary pray for us!!
Prayers
✨✨✨✨
Praying
Imagine what it’s like to be the one people say is difficult to love….they are often treated with indifference and that’s the opposite of love and they know it and feel it.
Trueeee❤❤❤❤❤
The scripture says " Be cunning as Serpents and gentle as Doves. " I really needed this reminder. I have a life full of people who are difficult to love. But I am equally as difficult. Because of this, God gives me plenty of reasons to be patient with those family, friends acquaintances and people that I serve to be patient and love with that one way street. Thank you Father Schmitz.
To love those who hurt us🙏🏽
What a wonderful video! It sounds corny, but honestly this video was uploaded at just the perfect moment in my life. Allelujah! Peace be with you Fr. Mike.
Hahaha! I always listen to you at 1.5x faster speed already!
This video was speaking to me in many ways. Thank you and God bless you!
I have a Co-worker who just drives me Bonkers. Good words and advise … I will put into action
Thanks! I love you father Mike. You helped me come back to the lord God 🙏
Hi David- we are so glad to hear it!
father Mike, we love you just the way you are. When I started watching I found your energy charming and your enthusiasm infectious and still do.
Thanks for giving us guidance on this Father Mike. My parents are difficult to love and I know where they’re coming from. I pray that God grant me the grace to be the “bigger person” so I don’t end up resenting them for what they did to me.
Thank you Fr. Mike. I will be sharing this as a number of people I know have expressed that, to be a good Catholic, we are to continuously turn the other cheek and allow ourselves to be a doormat. Some folks need to be loved from a distance!🙏🙏🙏
For sure! Having healthy boundaries means not allowing someone to use abusive language, call names, publicly criticize, ridicule, give unsolicited advice, or become violent. If a person must keep doing these things, I limit contact greatly.
@@BitsyBee Amen! Just last night I reminded my wife of a quip I heard several decades ago about how Thanksgiving starts that time of the year when we socialize with people we would never dream of socializing with if we weren't related to them! (We have a family too!)
Fr. Mike as always you give the Blessings to receive the Blessing. Thank you for the blessing of love and boundaries 🙏🏽🤗
This is so helpful, I've been struggling with someone in particular and know that the Our Father tells me what to do. I've been angry for so long, I desperately want to let go, but I do try to sincerely pray for and will her good.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂❤ I always changed the video speed when I listened to you, Father, but this, was so funny, I am crying in laughter. I always say, "My goodness, this priest must drink a lot of coffee!"☕️❤
Thank you, father. I was estranged with my dad for a decade by my choice and health and protection of my family. He recently passed away and while most of his side of my family proved they are mad at me at his wake and funeral I know they haven't known that I have prayed for him and offered up sufferings for him for the moment of his death. I didn't pray to be reconciled this side of eternity but rather that he repent and seek God's mercy at the moment if his death in the hopes we could be reconciled in eternity.
We always teach our kids that is someone hurts them where they need to set boundaries and not have a relationship with the person that what they can and should do is pray for that person and pray that they repent and seek God's mercy at the moment of death.
God is definitely talking to me right now. I definitely needed this today god bless you Father Mike. Please pray for me and my fiancé. We are going through a rough patch right now after a bad argument. We still love each other. But need prayers thanks. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻✝️✝️✝️✝️✝️
That would include everyone around me. My solution, love God more. I cannot care about the rest more.
I don't get people complaining about how fast fr. Mike speaks. You listen everithing on 1.5 or 2 anyway! If you can speed up your video, you can also slow it down. Leave poor soul talk in his own pace and be thankful he's still making content! Gosh, some people are really hard to love, arn't they ;)
100% . But there are people with self esteem problems and instead of setting boundaries they prefer to deflect and stay in their comfort zone of being a doormat. Please pray for them Father.🙏
Greetings: ( USA 🇺🇸) : btw: the Very Reverend Father Mike @ Ascension Presents 🎁, thank you: Again, the Very Reverend Father Mike @ Ascension Presents 🎁, thank you
Greetings: ( USA 🇺🇸) : btw: the presentation is outstanding: again, the presentation is outstanding
Greetings from southcentral Texas USA 🇺🇸, Nortb America, Western Hemisphere
Greetings: ( USA 🇺🇸) : Enormous Hug 🤗: Love ❤️: be Very, Very, Very safe, and in Thanksgiving: GOD BLess
Greetings: ( Ireland 🇮🇪, Western Hemisphere) : pray { USA 🇺🇸} for my great grandmother who is from Ireland and pray for my grandparents who are from Ireland 🇮🇪
Father Mike…I am praying for you! When I heard you will have a new Bishop, I am calling St Michael to protect you. Things will change and your joy has helped me. I went to confession after 30 years and it brought joy! I just was educated on Bishop Barrons new post and it is not close to you. I am praying for you both as you each are uniquely blessed.
This is a very important message. Yes, I have come across people who are abrasive, bull-headed, rude and difficult to be around. We come across such people in our families or work place and hopefully not too often in our churches. I never heard of love being a one-way street. That is insightful. "I will will your good. You may not will mine." This is sometimes easier when the person has deteriorated mentally due to dementia or illness that affects thinking and responses. We can give excuses then. "I am not willing to be your door mat." Yes, boundaries. Excellent points -- this video, I will listen to several times. Very excellent point: "I cannot give what I do not have." So, we need to receive the love of God's Holy Spirit. Heavenly love is the only love that facilitates the Kingdom of God within us.
You were not too fast for me before I developed encephalitis, but I have to slow down everyone, and it's not their fault, it's on my end. I found the "setting" on the gear and you can slow it down! You just keep doing what's you're doing. Thank you Father!!
Yhhh......... ✨✨✨✨✨
This is so interesting, Fr Mike. Thank you. We can always love and pray for others, whether they are lovable or not. God created them and He wants us to love them and will their good. Thank you, and God Bless. Claire.
Well said. You reminded me of a post that says Jesus loves the person you hate.
Please pray for me! I committed terrible sins in the past and am struggling to forgive myself, and I find my mind trying to justify those dreadful actions. The person whom I'm finding hardest to love... Is me. Again please please pray for me!
Very difficult to hear this, I thought that if I was loving and supportive that my relationship would work, I did not understand the alcoholic mindset and after both verbal and physical abuse I had to realize that it was time to leave and now I pray for him every day. Hopefully he will realize that God’s love is there for him as a great gift 💝🙏🙏🙏
As a teacher this touches somewhat on what I needed to hear. There‘a a lot of confusion in me as a first year teacher on how to run a class, be respected, and still practice charity. Students are (let’s face it) self-centered, tyrannical, and abusive if you’re a softie.
This could not have come at a better time. Thanks be to God for His insight sent to us through Fr. Mike.
This is such a great message today. It is hard when you love someone and they don't love you back. Boundaries are great advice. 👍 God bless you Fr. Mike.
Keep speaking your regular 60mph way of talking Father. It honestly is one of the ways your Faith in our religion comes across as far as I'm concerned
I've been looking for advice like this. Have had a huge fight and seperation from my oldest brother who I love very much because sometimes he's a bit difficult for wanting to have the last word. Please pray for those who have hurt and anger in their heart, they need Jesus's love. We all do.
This was so helpful! Some upper coworkers of mine can be "hard to love" at times and I never want to come off ugly (I was always raised to "kill em with kindness") but I can never tell the fine line between being loving but firm and trying to be loving but rude. This really clarifies things! Thank you Father!
We are so glad it was helpful, Andrea!
Hahahaha .. it's not too quickly, keeps my attention like nobody, there are no gaps in your speech and the dynamic of your voice keep me awake, my kids say the same! They don't wanna watch Mass with anybody else.
Father Mike, quickly or slowly, your reflection upon anything, any subjects are always good, nourished us , enlightened us
Lately I’ve felt in my heart that Jesus wants me to give more in my relationship with my mother in law she’s not easy to love. She probably feels the same about me. I’m so grateful to her for raising my husband to be the man he is and I want to love her because my husband loves her.
Oh my goodness- I spoke to my father who who is my spiritual director and wow! I m going to tell him to watch this video! Love is a one way street! 💜🙏💜Father Mike God bless your work!
Makes total sense and I'm glad you did this
I needed to hear this. Thank you Fr. Mike.
I needed this subject of video today. Thank you❤️
OMGOSH, this was the thing I needed to hear RIGHT NOW
Thank you so much, Fr Mike!
Thank you so much for this, Father Mike! Would love a follow-up video on how to establish Christian boundaries for the “difficult to love” relationships!
Im so thankful you made these beautiful videos, they are so insightful to watch!!!
Thank you fr. Mike. Needed to hear this.
I really needed to hear this. Thank you.
I like the quick pace. Keep up the good work.
Your videos always seem to be the best thing I need to hear. God bless you Father.
Always interesting Fr Mike, look forward to these every week, thank you
I think this video is very timely, especially with a heated trial between 2 people who said they loved one another, but then grew to hate one another.
Father Mike! This is one of the very best talks, explanations and guidance on true love and how to love. SO grateful you included the boundaries reminder too. Oh! And please, never change your voice nor the way you speak 😇 yours is the best and exactly as it should be. 👍
Going to re-listen to this again now. ❤️
Glad you enjoyed it, Sandra!
Yeah. Be yourself if that is comfortable. Do what Jesus says from your ❤heart.
Your videos are so full of energy and you always make so such funny intros I love it! Many good points… love is one way street, they don’t have to love us as we want to be loved. Loving is definitely a decision. I’ll watch this video again and pray for this. Thank you after Mike! Praying for you to keep you in good health and strengthen your faith, heart and soul. God bless!
Thanks for the video and sharing your point of view. God bless you Father Mike, have a great week.
It makes perfect sense, Fr. Mike!
Thank you Fr Schmitz, I needed this right now.
I really appreciate and respect what you do. It is a difficult field. Tremendous respect.
Thank you Father Mike, God Bless
Thanks Father Mike.
Thank you, Father Mike. I really needed this video as I am struggling with a sibling and his wife. Needed the reminder to "Love your neighbor as yourself". Your videos are always uplifting and inspiring. Don't worry about talking quickly-so do I! I can keep up!
Amen this is a great message!! Love is choosing the good for the other. But we can also set boundaries if the love is not reciprocated!
i love this video. thank you so much Fr. Mike
Thank you Father, you are a wise man. God Bless!!
Your talks are amazing and perfect verbal space.
Love is a one way street. Awesome!
Fantastic insight, Father Mike. Your pal Nick is a wise hombre. Blessings!
Perfect! Thank you! “Love is a one way street. Relationship is a two way street. Remarkable.
Thanks for making this video my man. I was having a very difficult time understanding how to approach someone who began to set tensions with me because of her pride. Thank you for making me understanding what the true meaning of what love is. I hope God can help me to settle the tensions towards common ground so I can help her the best I can.
I love you father Mike. Great outlook it is hard to do but willing to try.
Thank you for the Mike you have helped me come back to the Lord keep up all this beautiful work that you're doing I tell everybody about you have a great day amen
Thank you!! It is a amazing how Divine providence works. Praise God.
Fr Mike, I Love you man !
Thank you Father! Such a timely and true reminder! Praying for the grace to truly love as Jesus loved🙏🙏
So true. Loving someone does not mean that you like them. It's easy to think of love as something that is earned after first liking someone, but they are distinct.
Thank you Father Mike, difficult people need so much love, mercy, understanding, and compassion. I love this channel, I have learned so much from Ascension Presents 🌹
Father I love listening to your voice don’t change please
God Bless you for your advice on loving a difficult person🙏
Great message!
Love is to will the good of others.
‘Tough love’ is surely tough, but it is definitely willing the good of others.
So many points to contemplate in this message.
Love is not reciprocal! WOW
Easy to love if we know we are going to be loved back!
Thanks for the enlightenment!
Thank you for your talks.
Thank you Father for all of the practical daily advice about real life situations.
Don’t change a thing! I love the way you speak and your use of humor. God Bless You
Thank you Father Mike. MAY God richly bless you for your kindness and wisdom.
Treat them in good way , always , this are command of God.
Thank you very much 💕 ⚘️
Thank you. Very well said.
Thank you for the advices! From now on, I will understand how to love troublesome people. Choose to do what means for their good without expectations, and set clear boundaries to not be taken advantaged of by them.
I needed this so much today...
Oh, how hard it is at times to love who doesn't love back. I am just trying to remember God loves me and I love him and that is all that really matters.
Sooooooo beautiful....so healing....so true...Thank you, father....the key is to know that I am soooo deeply loved, no matter what happens in my life, no matter who happens in my life.... thank you!
True Father, very much so. One Way street alright!
Smacks my hand on a table*
You speak truth father Mike! Have a great day and God bless.
Thank you for this! I’ve been struggling with this concept lately and really felt like I was failing to be Christ-like when I set boundaries.
Father, I love your fast talking energy😃It’s awesome!