What Dad Bods Actually Signal To Women
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- Опубліковано 4 лис 2023
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Chris and Alex Datepsych discuss if women actually find dad bods attractive. Do women find Dad Bods attractive according to Alex Datepsych? What body fat percentage does Alex Datepsych say women prefer men to be at? Why do some women prefer the dad bods versus the bodybuilder type according to Alex Datepsyche?
#dating #dadbod #relationships
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Hello you ripped beasts. Watch the full episode with Alex here - ua-cam.com/video/FqFyVdWscEU/v-deo.html
Isn't the theory contradicting itself??? Women prefer dad bods to jacked bods due to less chance to cheat, but most women prefer dad bods so they are more capable of cheating.
@@markmorgan32of 😅😊😊
I'm in my 30's dating , what a woman liked at 20 is what she likes at 40, the only thing that becomes more important as they get older is money and security.
In a relationship, it is effort vs attention, Chris. To maintain a muscular physique with low body fat, a man needs to spend a lot of time building up muscle and draw a lot of dietary boundries. That often leads to less time with his partner and/or of lower quality ( being tired, set schedules, restricted going out when around food, getting snappy, low sex drive, erectile disfunction, etc.). Women usually aren't willing to compromise relationship quality so that their partner can get ripped. That is likely what the lady was refering to when saying she'd rather her partner was doing power lifting. It still had the aspect of physical activity with a goal but removes the intake restriction that often kills relationships via these small compounding changes.
It is as unappealing as dating a woman who is on a starvation diet to fit the smallest jeans size. Hence why normal body fat + reasonable level of fitness is preferred by most.
Well I've never been ripped but when ever my wife says no more boze I say yes your right IAM getting a bit of a gut and I haven't eaten . Suddenly IAM presented with 6 beers and a burger and fries with her saying sorry u work hard and deserve it . What does that tell u
If I had a nickel for every woman that found me unattractive I'd find a woman who finds me attractive!
😂😂😂
Underrated comment
That's seriously funny, man! :)
Bravo, sir.
Every girl I've dated when I'm ripped up gets insecure and tries to sabotage my diet. They always say it makes them feel bad about themselves, even though I don't judge them.
Keep it up . Not every women are insecure
Yeah, I agree with the other commenter. That’s a consequence of an insecure woman.
@@marienmorand True, not every woman is insecure....some are narcissistic!
Calm, steady, quiet confidence is a rare trait in the world, but doubly so with women (in my experience).
It just means they are not in your league. Keep looking.
That's good! Women bang dude they're insecure over. They'll never be insecure over some overweight dude.
My wife always gets mad at me for losing my developing dad bod, because it makes her look bad. The thing is, I’m not doing it for myself and I’m definitely not doing it to make her look bad.. Around the pandemic I made a decision to be the healthiest I can be, even if that means a boring diet with no snacking. I’m in my mid 40s and want to be around as long as possible for my 8 year old daughter.
Why did you choose her and now choose to stay with a woman who prefers you have an early death and for her daughter to go through losing her father all because she's thinking of herself and how it makes her look?
@@alexialira3839 She’s just giving me crap. She appreciates it, just knows she has health issues that make it more challenging for her to be active.
A female version of a man who feels threatened when his wife makes more money than he does.
And what would women say to those guys?
That's why I do it.
@jamesn7156 this is exactly why I do it too. I have 3 kids (12, 10 & 7). I want to provide for them and my wife a husband and father that is physically, mentally and spiritually healthy to help them navigate through life. Working out requires discipline and commitment and I see dad bods as lazy and people who give in to various vices that drag them down. How can that be a more preferable mate and provider than one who actually disciplines themselves to be all around healthy? Keep it up my man, your family will thank you in the end!
If they feel insecure, it's their problem, not ours.
if somebody around you is insecure, it pretty quickly becomes your problem too
@@snoookie456 and they either need to work on their problems, either do something about it or just be confident and not care or they can pretty quickly get kicked out
I had a Dad bod and no women paid attention to me. Now I am lean and muscular and the women pay much more attention to me. Never ask a woman what they want as they will tell you opposite of what is actually true.
exactly. Any kind of "advise" from women is complete garbage. 👍
And if you want to catch a fish you don't ask the fish ... you ask the fisherman!
I’m sure a big bank balance doesn’t hurt though for someone with a dad bod… just saying 😂😂😂
I think it depends on the guy. For example, tall and/or attractive guys can probably get away with more and imperfections (like a dad bod) can be seen as "cute" in a way. Same with short guys. "Dad bod" probably isn't very attractive if you're short. You'd probably look better if you were in slightly better shape than average.
Or what they want to be true or believe is socially acceptable for people to say.
Speaking *solely* for myself, I did better with women when I wasn't hitting the weights. But then again, when I was exercising regularly, my vanity was up and the extra testosterone production probably fueled some unnecessary aggression on my part...
As someone who's rocked a "dad bod" for over a decade now, yea, women don't like it.
I literally didn't receive a single compliment from women I don't know until I lost a bit of weight.
The guys I know that are actually in shape (and not super short or ugly) all have regular dates or an attractive girlfriend.
Don't fall for the virtue signaling.
A lot of women will date guy that their not attracted to and think to themselves he’s replaceable their doing him a favor and maintain a safe ego but they don’t really respect or admire that man its so backwards
Yep I once saw a b-grade celebrity saying she likes dad bods, so I googled her boyfriend and he was jacked, shoooooking.
@@ian9toes
Maybe her own dad was jacked? That's her idea of a "dad bod".
I was average at 34, not super lean but definitely juicy at 35 and got attention from 20 year olds. Now that I'm a tad fluffy women don't look (yes I'm married) so yeah not buying chicks dig dad bods. I'm sure they think they do but gotta go by actions.
Dude, I'm 5'7, not ugly at all but not particularly special looking, and I compensate for it by maintaining my physique and my health as well as working on my mental health constantly. I run my own business, I can pay my way, I'm ambitious and funny. I could have a date with an attractive woman every weekend if I wanted.
Point is, the only barrier for men to date women is themselves. Even being short, or ugly, is just an excuse men give for laziness.
40s and over, fitness strikes me as a strong indicator of socioeconomic class
Ahhhhhh! That makes sense. People always assume that I have more money than I do... maybe it's the fitness?
So, I'm now 60, went from the dad bod to the fit (athletic, not ripped, no abs) bod while away from home on business travel for several months in 2022. My wife's first statement upon seeing me revealed her fear that I'd hook up, or had already, with another woman. Had to explain that I did this as a life improvement for myself. I was tired of feeling like crap, in pain, and unable to fully enjoy outdoors activities. Screw what other people think. Do it for you.
I’m 6’ 5”.
When I was married, I had gotten up to 318 lbs. Since my divorce in 2016, I’ve been immersed in daily exercise and a completely clean diet.
I now hover at around 220 and I’m lean and muscular.
My ex wife constantly takes jabs. Says I look like a cancer patient.
Because you know, cancer patients have biceps with veins and striations through pecs and abs and can run sprint intervals etc…
She regrets being your ex instead of your present
She's hoping you'll take it to heart of what she says and you'll start going the other direction in looks and health so she doesn't feel so bad about herself for you being her ex. That is one of those compliments hidden inside of a insult. Keep doing what you're doing.
She is not ex if she still gets in your head. Get rid of that toxic shit. What's the point of your clean diet if you let people defecate into your soul???
what do you eat?
@@lunard8690Carnivore primarily. Meat, eggs, some Fage Greek yogurt and kefir etc
Find a woman who supports you being your best self.
Not one who is weak and becomes insecure from you being your best self.
Well said!
There are not a lot of them, unfortunately.
This is so true!!! I am a woman and workout and almost 50 and look younger and we want men to care about himself! My ex cheated on me and he was the so called good guy and years when younger didn’t think he was good looking at all.
Also if you’re overweight and not working out you will die earlier!!!! A woman that cares about you wants you to work on yourself!!!
@@Portia620 Yeah most "good" guys are just weak and undesired.
Their loyalty is caused by lack of options. Instead of discipline.
When they finally get the option to cheat they probably will.
"I don't like the jacked body because i worry about him being unfaithful" READ BETWEEN THE LINES! She is worried about him being unfaithful because she knows that that is attractive and so he will get lots of offers. This isn't quantum mechanics.
Maybe she should also get in shape lol
🤣🤣🤣
@@JonathanGonzalez-jz4tdBest reply ever! Salutes to you Bud!
@@vinaymulukutla358 🙏🏽🙏🏽
Met my wife when i was skinny. Got together, got incredibly fat. We had a child, decided I can't be a fat dad who can't play catch with his son. Started working out. A lot. Lost almost 100 lbs now I'm fairly shredded (from 26% to 10% BF), abs and the happiest I've ever been. My wife is still here and loves me no matter what body type I have. My goal is to live as long as I possibly can for my family.
Amen brother! 💪🏽
Smart man, and a lucky one too. Continue to live a great life brother because one thing that can fix this world full of hatred is a happy family and a happy life.
It’s more socially acceptable to verbalize liking a “regular” body. It makes you look bad if you favor “superficial” good looks.
Bingo
This. It’s the less insane version of people going nuts about “fatphobia”
Yep. Surveys are fairly useless. The online dating data is where the truth lies.
also usually "dad bod" means movie star when they're not working on a film...clearly "jacked" but a bit pudgy...they dont actually mean dad bod
Never expect honest blunt answer from women. they always say the least risky answer.
Ok there’s 2 you need to know fellas:
1. What a lot of women consider “Dad bods are basically dudes who are in shape but are bulking. If you really show a woman what a TRUE dad bod looks like, they will give it a thumbs down. So the reality is, No, women are not truly attracted to dad bods.
2. There are women out there who are attracted to dad bods, but not because dad bods necessarily turn them on, but because of the traits and cues that dad bods radiate eg. stability, less likely to cheat due to less competition, more likely to provide to compensate for his lack of physique etc. Usually those traits are tilted towards the dad bod guy having strong stable provider traits.
Couldn't have summed it better myself, this is so true
There you go...read this and save 10min
I was thinking the same. From the past, we see many paintings of fat-to-obese royalties or merchants with a whole lot more than a dad bod, yet at the time, those were the ideals for a man, because it signaled financial stability, ability to provide as well as having high status, most likely through a sought after title or trade.
I mean, when people refer to dudes with dad bods I feel like they mean big husky guys that are kinda fat, not just straight up fat people. So I'd say they might be attracted to them
A lot of 'fellas' seem to forget the muscle, strength part of the 'dad bod'. Having a six pack.. of beer every day is not going to lead you to 'dad bod'. Hard work is a crucial component.
My wife loves me no matter how I look, but she also loves how much I improve my physique. We workout together and she takes care of her body and health as well so that may play into it. But she’s not insecure so that makes a big difference. I’ve dated an ACTUAL narcissist before and she definitely didn’t really want me to grow physically. She wanted me to stay pudgy. After I broke up with her I realized I was in the worst shape of my life. The right person will work with you. Now I’m in the BEST shape of my life, and I’m only getting better and better. Everybody has their own set of issues but when God sends you the right person (if you’re even willing to wait on Him; not everyone believes in Him and offcourse I see that)
But when you find the right person, they make these things MUCH more pleasant experience 👌🏽 just make sure you be with someone that’s actually into YOU and not just an idea.
Becuase a woman who loves a man does not overfocus on merely one aspect such as physicality. If I love a man what matters the most to me is always his personality but when it comes to looks, yes I have some basic prefrences but what the man I love does to his body in terms of being more or less fit is his choice. And many women feel this way. Since training or dieting is someothing someone does in relation to himself and his own body, not in relation to another person and to their body. And women get judged for the way the look so harshly all their lives that they now way too well how hurtful it can be to be judged only on such basics and this is why they do not like passing such judgement of the man they love.
Good for you man that's great! Your comment made me look back upon a past relationship of my own. Was always eating poorly, not supported to focus on mindful or physical activities... I see why a bit more now
I hear this idea that women have different choices when it comes to long-term vs. short-term partners, and I noticed it too in my personal life. But I think one of the biggest issues today when it comes to dating is that women don't actually think "do I want a long-term kind of guy, or a short-term kind of guy" but instead they think: "I want a long-term relationship, with the kind of guy I'd also have a one-night-stand with."
That’s very insightful…you nailed it on the head. You wanna have opposing traits in one person. And when they can’t find it they cheat.
Wow, that’s very well said 👏
Agree.
Yup, and many men would ideally like a beautiful fit girl in her early twenties who is also mature and experienced like someone in her later thirties as well as independently financially secure.
@@Scott-fy7fm That was me. My own career, my own money, my own place that I owned. Never wanted kids and swam and did yoga. I got carded when I was 45 buying a 6-pack of beer. Not kidding.
I'm 72 now and been with a gorgeous guy for 20 years who's 14 years younger and pursued me. I'm 5'1" and still wear an XXSmall dress & size 3 jeans. I can fit into my old hippie mini-skirts too, but I would only wear them at home for nostalgia. He's 6'1" and got long, black curls, plays jazz piano, and cooks (he's Sicilian). I garden and we have an aviary and 6 rescue parrots.
I always wanted the same kind of guy, one who was attractive to me and also witty & intelligent, honest & caring about causes and people and animals. We have our own money so don't depend on each other financially. And we both got to retire early. It's great. We love each other and are both in good shape.
I exercise for myself. It helped me with my mental health over the pass 3 years which leads to better confidence. I am 31 now and it took me a few years to understand that putting yourself as a priority is much more important than trying to find a woman.
Amen Steven. ✌🏾
Hell yeah brother
To paraphrase a now somewhat famous Canadian that is despised by the left, get your room in order.
Woman in the same boat. It's just better to not revolve your life around the opposite gender and just do what's best for you. The right person will come along eventually.
1: Why not do both? Why are you assuming that you can either priorite yourself or find a woman. Do you realize there are men who priorite themselves and still have a girlfriend?
2: Lifting takes like 3 hours a week. You have plenty of time to find a woman.
3: Looks like you are just lying to yourself.
I had an ex who used to get upset when I would get really focused on training and diet. I couldn’t understand why. Then she admitted to me that when I was eat well and getting in better shape she felt obligated to do the same, and she just didn’t want too.
Good that you said "ex". You deserve better.
If a woman tells you she likes dad bods over fit guys I challenge you to wait a week or so when the topic is far out of her mind and find an opportunity to ask her who are the hottest male celebrities in her opinion, make sure to ask who are the hottest or most attractive, not favorite, because even Morgan Freeman could be one of her favorite actors. And the truth of what shes attracted to will be revealed, She will most likely name really fit actors or musicians, athletes than dudes with Dad bods. The reason I think you should wait is if you ask her right after she says she likes Dad Bods there is a chance she might virtue signal, humans tend to say what makes them look better whenever they are put on the spot or when they know their character is being tested, so she might name some actors or celebrities that she might really like but not necessarily attracted to their bodies because they are nothing special.
Also Notice that there isnt a single male influencer with a large following who is known for his physique and looks who has a Dad bod. anytime a man builds a following on social media for his body its always because hes fit. Women do not reward out of shape me UNLESS they provide something else of value, like a comedian, musician or actor. But if his body is his selling point I can guarantee you he's in shape, If you disagree, tell me then where are all the male dad bod influencers who have a million women following them because of how attractive his Dad belly is? In reality many women are intimidated by a extremely fit man (Especially if hes handsome aswell) because beauty is typically something women have more of than men, so in their minds it is their best ability in attracting a respectable man, but when the man looks better than her she feels like her powers are outmatched and probably not enough to truly keep him happy, especially if his other options are hot as well. god forbid hotter than she is. So her emotions and insecurity prefers the Dad bod guy, but her fantasies and desires would like the fit guy. Pay attention to the influencers she follows on IG and the type of love and romance movies she likes, If she was a twilight girl back in the Day or Magic Mike or loves anything Michael B Jordan then she is probably not being entirely honest about what shes attracted to but more so telling you the type of guy that her ego can handle being with.
@CaptainAbmerica I 100% agree with you on that , their ego wants the dad bod because the fit muscular makes them feel insecure. The thing you said about women being more beautiful than men in general but not being able to handle it when a man happens to be hotter than them is true as well , I've come across that mindset a few times from women tbh , also some might feel that a guy being took good looking is feminine if it puts a lot of effort into his clothing or skincare routine to look better than her but others will be into it because it isn't something men usually do but does make them look better
A lady I spoke to on the subject of gym fitness Vs dad bod told me she wouldn't want someone committed to workouts and exercises "if he's spending time in the gym, he's not spending time on me," respect for honesty but I thought, you sound difficult.
Well, some people do not have hobbies or passions, so they do not get along with people who have hobbies and passions since for both sexes pursuing a hobby or passion requires some alone time at times. And some people do not handle it well. So I would say it's not just gym and just females. It's about a romantic relationship or a friendship fof people with interests with people without interests. So it's best to search for people with hobbies if someone is a regular gym goer for example. I do have hobbies myself, so yes, I do need my alone time and I do value people who do have hobbies and need their time alone from me as well.
@@agatastaniak7459 Agreed. And I'd rather have a guy who had a hobby I found a little interesting. If my bf or husband has a hobby we don't share, I expect we will talk about it at least a little! He should be excited about it. But diet and fitness aren't interesting to me. I have no idea how this ended up in my feed.
Never go by a woman's words, go by their actions.
I prefer to call it a “Father Figure”😂😂😂
Lmaoo
Finally someone gets it.
Very Good!!
😂😂😂
Brilliant😂
It's not about the body itself. Most women don't actually care about that. It's what the body represents. Do you have willpower? Can you stick to something? Do you respect yourself? Are you selfish? Can you delay satisfaction? Etc etc etc. Your body reflects these things
If women do appreciate gym going in males yes, it has little to do with body looks. It's more about "he can set goals and achieve them, he can be persistent, he can endure long-term hard effort to reap rewards later". As for bodies, maybe it's thrilling for people who do modelling or bodybuilding for a living but it's very narrow group of entire population.
Great conversation thank you
I once was told a philosophy /saying among woman " no one gets a six pack to sleep with one person" 😂
A perfect example of how philosophy is a really really weak science
@@Zachhatesyoutube /facepalm
Unless she’s really into that particular beer
I’ve always had a good 6 pack! I love being with the one and only woman I’m married to.
@@Zachhatesyoutubelol you completely misread that
"Cheesecake your way into a new relationship" was an absolutely fantastic line 👌 😂
I'm eating cheesecake right now
I make the best damn cheesecake and I'm pretty darn fit!
@@bro7269 you mean't to say 2nd best......I am #1 LOL!
It’s a stupid line. An accurate line would be cheesecake your way into being cheated on.
If you are eating cheesecake you aren’t going to be at the 15-20% range.
I’m 26 and have a pretty muscular physique, not body builder shredded but definitely athletic looking. Some girls love it, some could not care less lol. Everyone has their preferences.
This is very interesting. Thanks for sharing.
They dont want a dadbod, they want an off-season bodybuilder.
They want Daniel Cormier, daddest man alive.
😂
Yeah, most women call 15-20% BF "dad bod"
The term is "Built-Fat"
The term is "Built-Fat"
Personal experience is that as soon as I hit a certain weight I stop having women look at me, then as soon as I drop to a certain weight I get looks again. I was quite ripped for a time and didn't remember getting much attention then, so I would agree that a lean but not crazy body is your best bet to attract someone. And yes, when in a relationship women will sabotage your exercise and diet to make themselves feel more secure, and you can't let them do that because it will kill your self-esteem and goals and then she'll leave you anyway.
Yea like the interviewee mentions it’s around 15-20% body fat and just by looking up some pics of that range, you are lean but not ripped.
The exact same happens to me. It's like a weird kind of spell or something. Glad I'm not the only one. And by the way my "attractive cutoff bodyfat level" happens to be around that ~15-20% they talk about in the clip, so they are definitely onto something.
@@Angel-wo8gv Yep it's for real, I think the strength plus the small layer of fat signals strength but also an ability to survive a period or starvation or a harsh winter or something like that biologically speaking. Also, people who are ripped come off very intense and that can repel women even if they look good.
@@adrianmasters250 Agree!
Bro ugh my mother did this to me LOL...
Im 24 never had a girlfriend, so ive been going to the gym, trying to make myself a better person. 2 years pretty good results. But my mom sabotaged me so much that when i understood what was happening it was too late. It truly destroys your self esteem. They want you to remain a nice guy, and when you are, they leave or don't give a shit. Now, men are not angels either. Both genders are equally prone to polygamy and cheating. Just that men maybe have more sense of "duty" I know a guy who's ripped as fuck and remains loyal to a normal girl. Women as well but it was in the past when they had role models like virgin mary and stuff
Brilliant video! The psychological aspects of bodybuilding are so important to be aware of and to use to one's advantage. Thanks a lot.
Thank you for posting: )
I think it’s possible to want to look and feel good without being narcissistic
Yes
15% body fat is still leaner than like 97% of the male population 😂 you also still have a 6 pack at that body fat percentage . thats also probably were zac efron and jason mamoa were when people were saying they had "dad bods"
15 PERCENT?? 15 percent is exactly the healthy standard for men. There's no way that is a "dad bod".
Crazy to even consider that as "unattractive".
@@Eric149162536 yeah they literally say in this video a "dad bod" is 15-20% body fat 😂
@@Eric149162536agreed dad bod is more like 20% body fat and muscular
@@Eric149162536 people are... firstly delusional...
And secondly they have no efing idea what they talking about. I don't blame them though. It was a time, few years ago, when every single influencer with 10%-15% bf, was rumbling about how his bf is on a 4%-6% level. Most professional athletes have bf between 12 and14 percent but most people think this is actually around 5% because that's what they were told, over and over again.
Chris has no idea what 10% with muscularity actually looks like
I am 51 and have had body fat between 4 and 20% depending on where I was in my life. Never had an issue finding women at any body fat level but definitely have noticed certain women prefer certain body parts. Women that are into chest or abs seem to prefer the leaner type typically, but women who are into arms or legs don't mind a bit of a belly. Between 2015 and 2020 I had a lot of women tell me they were into dad bods (and their actions followed their words - I was around 18 to 20% body fat then). Their reasoning was guys that were super ripped tended to be more narcissistic. Don't know how true that is but that was what I was hearing regularly
Loved this.
it’s important to note that to get away with a dad bod nearly 100% of the time you just need a good looking face. if your face is a little busted you are harder pressed to have a great body
Busted 😂
It’s hard to have a good looking face if your bf % is above 20-25. Almost everyone looks better when their bf is between 15-20%.
This is true …my boyfriend has a beautiful face and it compensates for the extra 25 lbs….
Nah. Just got to have Chadittude. Even a pretty face can be a slug underneath. But if you know you rock, they'll see it in your walk.
@@aelfredrex8354 😆 🤣
Are the women he’s been asking attractive or not? Because I feel like that has an affect on the answer they give to his question.
100%. I've never seen a girl who is super attractive say she prefers a dad bod.
People just project their own insecurities and that tells you all you need to know about the girls picking dad bods
Good ass point
Fit girls do not prefer dad bods. We want someone who is as disciplined as us. We see a sloppy body and assume the rest of their life is sloppy as well. That being said… many fit women do NOT preferred bodybuilder types. It’s too much. Those guys only love themselves.
@@ajrob77well said. I’m fit. My husband is fit. Fitness is important to me because of lifestyle factors.
Bodybuilding is a whole other conversation and those men are not attractive physically to me.
But as a fit woman, I would not feel comfortable sharing my life with a man who didn’t value his fitness.
What excellent content! Insta subbed. Cheers from France!
You spoke about people who train consistently could be looked at as reliable. I have noticed the opposite. They may reliably take care of themselves but may not make it to a couples event due to their self focus. On one hand this may be bad but you have to admire someone who puts their health first.
To be fair, I was in shape when younger surfing 4-5 days a week and later in life work dad bod. What mattered for me most was indifference towards women. They found my indifference attractive but also not hard on the eyes and that helped as well. Don’t chase women. Be busy and be busy on your improvement.
They didn’t find your indifference attractive: they found that you were not intimidating and connected more easily with you because they could relax around you, given that you weren’t all up
In their faces. Guys tend to think they are just giving us attention but if we look minimally alright, we get way too much “attention” which is really aggression. I spent most of my life having them back off. I learned to answer “you’re so pretty” with “yeah, I know,” which has been a handy shortcut to efficiently guarding my personal space (after trying to be more polite and seeing that men conveniently disregarded my obvious attempt to just be respected). Men have no idea the threatening ways guys try to “give us attention.” You are mistaking women feeling comfortable around you for interest and intentions.
Also, “don’t chase women” sounds like the classic advice to play games. If you are interested, show it (without being intensely seductive and without insulting her intelligence). If you are not interested, show it (without being a dick). Be genuine. Otherwise, don’t act surprised when people whine about the loneliness epidemic.
@@Gomba13if you’re a woman which i think you are this answer is definitely truthful and golden! 👏🏽
@@Gomba13 You cannot demand respect, you must earn it.
Also, be less smug in your observations. The world doesn't revolve around women, however much they love to think it is.
@@thefirsttrillionaire2925 What a simp. Just buys her crap all hook, line and sinker. 🤣🤣🤷♂
@@Gomba13 There's nothing wrong with "don't chase women'. The only games being played would be from your end. Men on their mission will invariably attract the right ( and sometimes the wrong) women. But their mission or objective comes first. Wouldn't expect you to understand our perspective.
I am a male romance novelist published under a female pen name. I am not a NY Times Bestseller because their system for tracking is corrupt, but I am an Amazon and Wall Street Journal bestselling author.
Having not only looked at the covers of hundreds of romance novels, but having read over sixty books as of this post, I can safely say that women do not fantasize about dad bods, nor do they fantasize about "nice guys", unless that nice guy is exceptionally better than the average male man.
Physically: 100% of the books I've read, the guy is at least 6 feet tall. I have read ZERO books below this height. He is either in shape or he looks dangerous--he's tatted up or looks like he could serve time in prison and survive--in nearly all of the books I've read.
Non-physically: In every book I have read but five, the man is an alpha male. No question about that. The rare kind of "nice guys" are usually the golden retriever types. A book like "Reckless" by Elsie Silver has one of these types, and even then, the guy starts as a bad boy in the past and becomes a golden retriever in the future. Rather, women like when the guy who does 80% selfish actions, is nice like 20% of the time, and usually just nice to her. An exception is if the guy is a single dad; in that case he does good things for his child, but the rest of his actions are pretty assholish and usually broody.
Those are the numbers from what I've seen, take them how you want.
Edit: Because of the upvotes, I want to say, there is one book that I've read where the guy is a nice guy, and didn't start off as a bad boy. It is called "Before Us" by Jewel E. Ann, and it is an amazing book. But out of the 60+ books that I've read, that is the only book where the guy is a nice guy from start to finish.
Wow. Amazing insight thank you
It's the lover and provider dichotomy.
Women are sexually attracted to the lover first and foremost; badboy archetype who satisfies the sexy son hypothesis(mating preference for males who will pass on to them better mating genes for their sons)
Women also want a provider which is not the lover archetype.
A women's wet dream is "Lover First, Provider Later" scenario; the pivot of the assholish sexy guy from lover to a real relationship.
Women like the idea of a man that is nice to only her. That she somehow brought out the best in him that no one else ever could. That she was special enough for him to change for her. That is what they are attracted to
The day the world takes serious interpersonal advice from escapist fiction novels is the day the world has given up.
Yeah that’s pretty fucked up if anyone’s mind has been persuaded to belive the dad bods are attractive to women they are the equivalent to a baboon dancing for chicken. It’s understandable to find nice guys not attractive but it’s funny how far on the garbage side of the spectrum women go looking for enjoyment. Too many women are damaged beyond repair with lack of relationship skills and just got fantasy’s nothing wrong with a good fantasy either everyone should take care of themselves to their best plenty of guys can do well looking for something short term with most women but something that will last for the long hoal isn’t looking too good thanks for the insight
Im nearly 60, ive had the dad bod, hard bod, lean bod , jaked bod.
During my dad bod Times is when I've picked up the most.
Its more about confidence than what you look like.
Also consider the environment/city you were in at different times in your life. In certain environments the dad bod might be more popular because of the type of women you’re around. In an area where health & fitness isn’t taken as serious the women will usually favor dad bods, but if you go to a gym where most women are in shape they will lean towards in shape guys
Different generation there bud. Times changed, looks matters a lot and people are more shallow and superficial nowadays.
chris! it's so nice to see that you will reach 2 Million subscriber soon!
I’ve lifted weights my entire adult life and any time I go on a cut or clean up my diet, without fail the girl I’m dating accuses me of wanting to step out. Women say they want their man to have goals but the only goals they care about are the ones that directly benefit them. Don’t believe me, tell your girl you’re working extra hard to get a promotion at work and then a few days later tell her you’re training to run a marathon.
Don't let a gf/woman ruin it for you. My husband lijes to train and i prepare 99% home made meals so he knows what's in the food I NEVER sabotage his goals . Women who deliberately want you to fail have their own issues.
Women don’t care about goals, they care about picking up the slack
I think she’s just afraid she’ll leave her.
@@ab-gailwat
You haven't been fortunate to have been with a good woman than. Because any woman that truly loves her man will be their man's loudest cheerleader and be there to for them and help them get back up when times are hard. We don't do it because it is our goal but because it is our husband's goal and we want them to be happy and to achieve what they set out to do, especially because our husband's would do the same for us.
I have had multiple girlfriends try to fatten me up. Each time they say "Oh I like you with a little extra meat" or some other line as they encourage me to eat. A lot of it has to do with Insecurity, when your ripped to the bone and jacked they are afraid you'll draw too much attention from other women. The "Dad Bod" is safer to women if they are feeling insecure.
That is actually sometimes very true. Be healthy, be happy.
That means you probably date women who are overweight and insecure. I’ve dated men who try to fatten me up because they’re insecure. These men were in shape too
Well many women prioritize security in a relationship.
I’ve had the same thing happen with wife whenever I start my cut. I just ignore it and keep pushing forward. About a month in, she starts a cut as well. I’m ashamed to say I’ve lied about being on a cut before just to get her to lose some weight 😂
And this right here is why women actually prefer a little chunkier dude. @@kungfoochicken08
I love that Gabriel Iglesias' use of "fluffy" has been such an influence on us all.
DONKEY!!
After starting to go to the gym regularly, I definitely appreciate people who also take care of themselves more so now
Ive been having a hard time in my marriage, because ive decided to redouble my fitness efforts as i transition into my 40s. It seems like the better shape i get into, the more bitter my wife gets.
Ive never cheated on my wife, or even allowed myself to be in a position of suspicion, but she seems to be bothered that im in just about the best shape of my life, and shes completely let herself go.
Which took me by surprise, because she's always treated me as something of 'an accessory' to her life, and you'd think I am adding value to that.
You already have bad feelings about the marriage. You'll cheat when tested.
She should be happy & supportive that you’ve improved yourself. The fact she isn’t says a lot about her im afraid. My wife is exactly the same and asks me who I’m getting in shape for! I tell her the truth - me!
Put yourself first mate.
As a woman, I’ll tell you: she is insecure. Period.
I am a boxer. Been doing it for 10 years. Most Women are freaked out by people like me.
They like the idea of dating a “ wild animal “, but it is pure fantasy in reality.
Extremes on both ends of the spectrum don’t work.
Finding a decent balance between fitness and being non threatening is the sweet spot for both genders.
Interestingly, I am actually a nerd who analyzes financial markets for a living. Just because I train hard and have competed in boxing does not make me a freak.
I am just a little OCD, and training has been one of my focuses. In reality, I have never harmed anyone outside of the confines of a boxing fight or sparring.
Wow excellent comment please explain more!!!!!!!!!!
Same here, I’m the only bodybuilder in our town
I hear you bro, after years of martial arts and fitness training, my physical, posture and demeaner (relax and confident movements), never have anyone licking a fight with me, this make life a lot nicer too
Man i would LOVE to have you as a friend!
I train bjj, kick box and train with weapons and I've discovered it usually scares women as well.......and people in general. A few women were absolutely terrified after watching me train, which was mind-boggling to me!
"cheesecake yourself into a new relationship with a hottie" - best dating advice I ever heard lol
🤣🤣
I’ve had a few women complement my dad body(I’m a single dad of 2) and dating as a single father. I used to be much better shape. But I’m glad I’m not being completely written off because of where I am in life right now.
I think you have to take into account whether or not the woman is athletic herself. I am a woman who has always been into health and fitness pursuits. Been a personal trainer most of my life. I can honestly tell you I would never prefer a dad bod to a lean male. And many of my female colleagues feel the same way. It's a shared interest thing.
Same. I’m also a trainer and dad bod is a sad bod for me. I dated a guy before I met my husband who didn’t lift weights and was super threatened by my doing so. No thanks.
@@nancybrown8991What about a guy thag has a dad bod but lifts 5 days a week?
Financial status is more important thing for man than his body, by the way,
@@nancybrown8991 what about financial status? Its more important for man.
You don't know what you're missing.
I was never into muscular guys until I started lifting weights myself and I began to associate all those traits you mentioned.
Congratulations on seeing the light.
A very good debate here
Very interesting.
If you want to know the truth of any conversation, you must read between the lines. He said it. The women feel insecure when the man is to shredded, he might cheat. And we all know women actually want a man who’s desired by other women. ( they don’t admit that though) so guys don’t stop keep getting shredded and your women will not leave you.
Once again, when asked if dad bods are attractive, we get nowhere because people constantly conflate the two meanings of "attractive".
When men ask "what do you find attractive?" they usually mean, to put it bluntly, "what get's you horny?"
When women hear that question they will give a long list of non-sexually stimulating qualities they want in a man.
If they do not feel like they'll be judged for their answers, for example if the survey is anonymous, they may also throw a bunch of actually sexually arousing traits in there.
That's how you get "I prefer dad bods because they're less threatening, signal comfort" and so forth. They're not aroused by a dad bod, they prefer it as a body type over the generally more arousing body type of a muscular dude for a bunch of non-sexual reasons.
Now here's the kicker: The list of traits which women will give you upon being asked what they find attractive in a man are for the most part traits they would like to have in a man they're already sexually attracted to, not things that will make the man atractive.
In the same way, a dad bod is not sexually attractive (for most women), but certain women may prefer a less muscles and a higher body fat percentage on a guy they are already sexually attracted to.
I think it’s the classic confusion of what one sex ASSUMES is attractive to the other sex as they value it. Men might think the most muscle bound man will be the most popular physically because they admire it. Women like muscle, but enough to look naturally masculine is fine. A six pack and muscle bound is just not necessary or even desired by most women. They would almost always prefer a reasonably fit man who was kind and funny. Too much muscle can actually be intimidating and frightening to women as it signals aggression.
@@viviennedunbar3374 it's a complicated and multi-layered issue and the very different perspectives of men and women do make the entire topic very confusing for the average person.
Judging by your name I'm gonig to guess you're a woman, so I got a small reqeust:
Can you give me a list of all the traits you find attractive in a man, be it body, mind, character as well as assets like a car, hourse, money etc.?
Just all you can think of. I am not going to judge you, so please be entirely honest, no matter how superficial or shallow you think some of your hidden wants and desires may make you appear.
Interestingly they want some fat and less muscles on guys they ARE already attracted to is about security!
They want MONEY! Lots and lots of money.
The bodyfat adds volume and mass, the body is bigger. This mass and "bigness" associates with power, strenght, protection. A 10-15% bodyfat, may look skinny and weak compared to 20-30% bodyfat. It's the same trait line that pushes women to (sexually and in any other way) to prefer taller men. The same thing it seems pushes them to look for little bit more fat. Another thing is that fat storage and energy surplus is requisite for testosterone production, low fat and caloric restriction equals lower t.
It works the same way in reverse. Ask guys and a lot will say they like a curvy girl or a girl with some meat, not the anorexic look. But then you see who they actually pursue and it’s the skinny girls. I’ve been both super fit and quite chubby. When I’m chubby I don’t get a glance. No one wants to be thought of as shallow so they’ll say they prefer the ‘less perfect’ body types.
What's your definition of curvy? I ask because I just think it's flat out wrong to state that guys only prefer slim girls.
First of all, "never listen to what a woman says they like, watch who actually go for." This is the most obvious when it comes to personality or behaviorial traits where women will say they want "a, b and c," but then you'll consistently find them with guys that do not exhibit any of those things, but instead are "p, t and x." The "comfort" aspect of this is correct, however it's not because she fears he'll cheat necessarily. Always think about the ways in which it benefits the woman and her ego. If she's with a guy that is lean and fit, she feels pressure to keep in better shape both for him and to compete with the other women that will surely be showing their interest. From an evolutionary standpoint, a soft man does not benefit her or the genes of her offspring, so what are you going to believe: the words of women whose minds change based on momentary feelings, emotions and social influences, or their nature formed by evolution?
this.
While that's true, 'ripped' wouldn't be beneficial either. A bodybuilder that is jacked but very lean will be slower and weaker than a guy that does functional fitness/mma/crossfit even though he's not about to be gracing the cover of men's health.
@@tempsoda plenty of the top performing cross fit and MMA athletes easily fit into the ripped category. Many have sub 10% body fat, which is considered ripped by the vast majority of the general populace and even the fitness industry.
Pro Body builder stage lean is a whole other level that even they don't maintain outside of the time period of the competitions. It goes beyond just lean and involves water and sodium manipulation.
@@dukekessler6292 I personally think single digit body fat is what most people would picture when they say ripped. The average body fat percentage women say they find most attractive is around 12%, compared with 5-8% bodybuilder physique. I honestly think most people especially women would prefer the former, even though men might admire the latter. The women saying they prefer upwards of 25% are lying or have some obscure fat fetish!
A person's words reveal what they want to believe, while a person's actions reveal what they truly desire.
I had a dad bod on and off. I started hiking and trail running slash walking at 40 and now do about 5 km each day with a 30 kg pack when my girl friend joins in and started loosing weight the insecurity issues stopped.
losing*
Im glad he mentioned that last part, cause i do think context is important. Who women will marry vs sleep with are two very different things.
Im usually on the leaner side but sometimes i go through bout where i must take prednisone for health reasons and my weight gets more heavy set. Ive found when im leaner, its often easier to hook up with less pressure of long term, but more heavy set, women more widely even older compliment me and see to be interested in long term relationship.
I just like muscular men but not super lean men. Super lean signals to me that they have to keep a very strict diet, and could interfere with what I like to make for dinner. It signals someone that takes themselves a little too seriously. Always thought there was something hot about a guy that will eat my left overs and can still kick some ass. I also prefer men that don't style their hair or have perfect clothes. I like 'em a little rough. They just seem the most masculine. But of course, that's just me. The very lean men out there are still very impressive and I respect it and I'm happy to have such dedicated men in our society.
As a 36yr old I’m not what I used to be, but I have had girls then women chasing me since childhood. I’ve never cheated but most of these women have screwed me over. I’m not a “nice guy” nor a narcissist jerk. There is no point in asking a woman what she wants because she honestly doesn’t know and everything she says is a contradiction.
Truth. Never ask a woman anything about themselves because they really don't know and if they do they will not tell you.
They don’t even know what they want, it depends on the mood at the moment. I say that not with hate, just an observation.
Interesting conversation. In my personal life, I've found that when I've been in a really good shape I get far more women, and the opposite when I'm not in good shape. I think it makes a big difference.
As you get older, it is even more important to keep in good shape; and, because a greater percentage of your contemporaries are becoming unfit, women notice you more. I say that as a man of 62 years with a six-pack. The only women who might appreciate a dad bod are the plus-sized frumps.
@@dpstrialI’m 40 years old and I’ve been in shape for 17 years now. I get hit on by 20 year old women more than ever at my age. I don’t flaunt my money, I do make a good living working in the oilfield. But I don’t wear designer anything or drive an expensive car.
IDK why this video got recommended to me but it’s interesting to hear guys perspective on what they think women like. For the most part I think they were dead on, but too often I see men trying to mold themselves into what women supposedly want taking advice from everywhere, looking for the magic formula. Please remember to do things for your own enjoyment, don’t just do stuff because you think women will like you more because you do x, y, z thing. And psst, yes, women like it when you have other interests outside of “getting women” (we can tell) because once you got a woman we need to know you’re going to spend your time doing something else.
So interesting.
I’ve been a gym rat since I was 14, and I didn’t get laid until I was 25. I ended up marrying her a couple years later, and we’re still together after 15 years now.
The belief that the gym bro is going to cheat or have a bunch of partners wasn’t true for me! 😂 I’ve only been with one woman!
You can get fit without being a gym bro though. If you can tolerate doing it, working out and getting in shape does NOT necessarily have to be your entire identity, and having had sex either recently, or at all, also doesn't have to be the primary staple of your worldview.
That's awesome mab
Based!
Congrats on meeting the love of your life after one try. Stay blessed
You are a unicorn!! Your wife is one lucky lady
I had to deal with the whole insecure spouse, she would constantly bring fast food and act offended when you won't eat it, then they pretend to start exercising with you, and all they're doing is trying to take up your focus when you're lifting heavy and need to focus, then they start wanting to start making food and you find that they're loading it with crappy saturated fats, it got so bad I had to make my own food and also keep my food tucked away from her seeing it or it would be "accidentally" or "they thought the food looked bland so they added some dressing to it" it was constantly trying to sabotage my gains and muscle mass, women are the most insecure when you're leveling up because they suddenly realise that other chicks see your value and that makes them insecure as hell.
Nothing wrong with saturated fats. The crappy fats are the unsaturated seeds oils and other processed foods.
I hope you dumped her, if you have figured this out and you are still with her you need help.
@@chris2790tell that to your arteries, I cook my own food, I don't eat fast food I don't need that soft plague in my arteries.
@@hipsonsogbono I am not with her, she became a total psycho, I had to go through all sorts of hell because of how "her feelings made her feel" completely irrational and she as far as I know still eats crappy fast food. There's a reason they call it junk food. I literally used to go "gee thanks," would drive around the corner after dropping her off, and then throw it out of the window or find a park bin and ditch it there for the wildlife to raid that, I don't need to eat something that doesn't rot when left uneaten, there's no way in hell that can be good for the body, god only knows what it does to your endocrine system but I sure as hell ain't finding that out, people literally paying to destroy their health, that's insane.
@@treesaremadeofwood2145 good lessons to learn about women, many of them have issues they project onto their partners, man up dump them, move on, get stronger. I understand how people get trapped though once you get out of a couple, those light bulbs go off
As a wife speaking on my own husband and preferences, I’m more into the “dad disposition” or a masculine yet nurturing person. Not too worried about a bod, but it’s desirable to be with someone who takes care of their health.
Becoming a father really inspired me to set a good example and get in shape - but I’ve never felt the least inclination to do so for the attentions of a woman.
There is a video were girls said that they prefer dad bods over a fit body. When they showed pictures it appeared that what women classified as dad bod was DANIEL CRAIGS BEACH PICTURE IN JAMES BOND....
Exactly a “dad bod” in ancient times when humanity developed. A lithe and muscular man but not overly so.
@@viviennedunbar3374 No mate. Daniel Craig in that photo is extremely muscular, and way way way above average.
Dad bod = I’m not afraid of him. He won’t hurt me. It’s insecurity and fear.
Fear isn’t love.
The hot guy is the fantasy she doesn’t feel like she’s worth.
It sounds like it’s just insecurity.
Woman will cling to the dad bod guy as a comfort zone. They feel insecure and…it’s their own low self esteem that makes them choose “safe” partners.
I’ve met men that do this too.
Date down because they can “trust” someone less attractive then who they are really interested in.
Fear
I’ve lost woman before as I became more successful. They tried to sabotage my progress and growth because of their own insecurities. Tried to bring me down. So
If you want to grow as a man and be your best self
Make sure the woman in your life is very secure and very supportive
Or they will try to drain you with drama to get attention
Out of their own insecurities
And they will try to make your life worse
So you don’t leave them.
It’s very backwards behavior
Because it will sometimes cause a man to leave them
So if you notice they try to drain you energetically with drama and attention seeking behavior
Take shots at your diet and excursidlze routine
It’s because she’s afraid of losing you
She’s afraid of you getting too good for her and abandoning her
If you let her do this to you
Don’t be too shocked when you get all fat and she leaves toy for a guy on Instagram with nice abs after telling you she doesn’t like muscles
✌️
I used to be shredded and my experience was that girls loved it... But didn't want it in their stable relationship as it made them insecure. They seem to prefer a little bit of a gut BUT with strong shoulders and arms. This is something people forget when they talk about dad bods, you still need to work out. Who used to chop firewood all day? Dad probably... You need to look like you still could do that. 😂
I'm currently returning to my old physique and just like the girls in my 20s, now that I'm about 40 I'm hearing the exact same... But I don't care😂 let's go gym🎉
Be in your best shape for you
Stay strong stay healthy. As far as what women want or don't want they can piss off
Damn right 👍
52 years of marriage have taught me that true love endures all physical challenges, including the bodily changes that come with aging. Marriage for life to a decent, caring, and sweet woman is recommended.
Women dress to impress other women. Men work out to impress other men. Men like clothes that reveal body parts doesn't matter the designer or style. Women like men who are relatively neat and not sloppy fat or mushy. No bellies.
Thing is, being able to impress other men and be somewhat above them conveys status in society, women are attracted to that. Attractive women report being treated bad by other women so it's only useful to attract those high status men and benefit from it.
@@ChiefMane1 however, it's likely it will be men you will be protecting yourself from. If you're scrawny they'll bother you. If not you'll be formidable. I doubt you'll be fighting off women. But who knows in this day and age.
Impressing other men is the first line of defense, the safest fight is the one that doesn't take place.
Men work out to impress other men? Not really. We generally work out because we want to be fit and be able to do physical stuff. We also do it to compete with other men, if they are impressed we can bench press more then they can, great! We do also work out to impress the ladies.
I workout because, I'd like to avoid future backpain. 😭
I'm a former bodybuilder. I did a powerlifter competition once (it was fun to try). I'm fairly lean still and I don't want a man within the 15-20% body fat because that is more than me. I like a muscular man. Needless to say, I've been single quite a while :(
Do you consistently maintain a sub-15% body fat? I know that's extremely lean for a woman.
I’ve had dating success as a skinny bony dude, a chubby dude, and a lean fit dude. So idk what to tell ya except different strokes for different folks. There’s no winning formula or cheat code.
When I was in my best shape, muscular and lean, I got more one or two night stands than I can remember! When gym and extream diet was no longer a priorty and I gained a little fat, then my experiences with women was completely different. Im sure women experience the same when they lean out and change physical appearance.
This video is all over analyitical. Many women dont need you to have an 8pack or 6pack. They just appreciate strength and confidence. Good sex and masculine mindset and frame. Dont live with women either. Dating will go great.
That is true. I remember feeling out of place after having my baby and once the baby weight fell off and then some, male attention returned to its normal rate 😉🤭😂
Translation: Dad bod = anyone not a bodybuilder ready to step on stage. 😂
Also I've noticed that girls that say they like dad bods could never pull a guy who is actually in shape. I think it's their way of acting like they are choosing a guy who looks fat instead of being forced to date them because they themselves are out of shape.
This hit the nail on the head
I've not really noticed this. The woman I was in a relationship with who liked the jacked look was notable for her high sex drive, she wasn't a great looker. The beautiful women I've known seemed to prefer a normal/dad type look.
100... the same way guys who can't accept that they can't actually pull a model will say that they don't prefer those type of women
@@simontmn no it’s true the reason the beautiful women you’ve encountered are looking for a normal/ dad bod look is because they got tired of being on too many in shaped men’s starting line up
I google imaged dad bod and no, those bodies are not good. My male family members don't look like that, and many are dads, Maybe google image has it wrong.
my wife said she likes me having a dad bod but when i ripped up last year i notice she runs her hands over my chest and arms which she never did before
Same
YUP. Watch actions, results, not words. Same for me
Worked out hard for a few yrs Didn't really realize my shape. Took my t-shirt off in company. They noticed. Older now but the effort i put in has lasted. Highly recommended to young men.
Hahaha my partner of 15 years is a natural bodybuilder. REMEMBER there is comp lean for a period of time but they reverse (or should) out. His legs, square pecs and muscles turns heads, men and women! I am not jealous at all, he’s been faithful for 15 years and he’s not vain. What you said around 6min mark is SPOT ON! He is consistent, masculine, he insanely focused, can push himself, he doesn’t drink alcohol or take any drugs, he cares about his diet and the house isn’t full of junk. Geezz a lot of women are too insecure and/or settle too easily. Dad bod is ok if you love him but I’d encourage him to be healthier
I like the way I look at 15%. It feels good and is easy to maintain. I'm sticking with that regardless of what women or anyone else thinks lol.
I have a Dad-bod because:
- I work all day and when I’m not working I’m trying to be a good Dad to my 3 little girls by spending time with them, and what ever energy I have left goes to my wife.
- my physical self image is no longer a priority. I have no desire to be especially attractive. I just want to be healthy enough to be useful to my family for as long as possible.
- I’ve accepted and embraced this new stage in my life where my body naturally shows signs of older age (42). Humans weren’t designed to look one way forever. Life is about experiencing it, not trying to look youthful in your later years. If you look like you’re 20, embrace looking like 20 and living life as a 20 year old; if you’re 50, embrace looking and living life as a 50 year old.
- more power to everyone who’s super fit. That’s important to you, and i absolutely respect it, but family and responsibilities are more important to me and I don’t have the time, energy, or need to be in top shape.
Thank you
It’s not about looking attractive it’s about staying in shape and keeping your body healthy so you don’t have issues when you’re older.
Mah. After you divorce, you wish you did more on the fat belly. Oh, me? How do i know? Well, glad you asked. 32 years of marriage, no cheating, no hate. Just getting divorced for reasons I still don't understand after raising six wonderful kids to adulthood. Best your arse I wish I wasn't a good 70 lbs too heavy! I feel like sheet. I look life a fat guy with the big dad belly, and I'm unhealthy. I am depressed, lonely, and barely find a reason not to jump. STAYING FIT and caring about yourself isn't just for you either. Don't give up everything for THEM! You lose yourself in doing so, and trust me, you kids and wife don't want that either! Taking care of yourself is ATTRACTIVE and important. It means you care about yourself. That is a GOOD THING. I wish I understand this at 42! I'd be married still!
At 40 I didn't have a belly, now at 48 I look like I'm 9 months pregnant with twins, fibromyalgia made me stop moving my body a decade ago.
Then eat more, let yourself go, let nature do its course and charge you for the bad choices you make and naturally select you and let the fit and strong survive.
Read a short book - convict conditioning by Paul Wade, your excuses will evaporate.
I've been training for over 20 years non-stop, but never been lean, I've always been over 20-25% fat and the main reason was, I hated dieting and whenever I tried it, I looked like a saggy scrotum. Never again.
You must have dieted the wrong way.
@@experiencinglifeisthepurpose I never was a n exprt, so probably you are right, but the past year, for the first time in my life I did more than 1 hour a mnth of cardio (4-5 hours per week), little food, I looked absolutely shit.
Saggy body, no muscle, no 6 pack, no strength, no libido.
My gf always complains when I get below 15% body fat. She says I don't look healthy, but it just so happens that's about the same time I get the most attention from other women.
Do you feel healthy or energized at that body fat percentage?
@@michaelajames99 I'm not sure I notice a difference as far as energy. However, when I do cardio, my heart rate does not go up as high as it used to, and it comes back down significantly faster. I also feel more of a spring in my step. Both result in an increase in my desire to exercise more often and for longer periods. So I guess that's a plus.
Maybe a person that eats what they want, when they want is just happier and more pleasant to be around.
Coping
I’m in my 40s and been married for almost 15 years. I got healthy and lost a lot of excess body fat over the last few years and when I started getting abs my wife got insecure. This totally checks out, at least in my experience.
Personally. .I am over 40. .my son is 21 and my daughter is 9. I workout virtually every day. It has nothing to do with being narcissistic. 1. . It is my outlet. As in it is very therapeutic and it also leaves me feeling as though I am capable of achieving goals in all aspects of my life. Secondly and even more importantly. .Some of us (as fathers) have the mindset/thought process "Hey, I don't want to be out of breath trying to spend time with my daughter." "If shit ever hit the fan,I want to be able to actually fight for/protect my family in a dangerous situation." "I dont want to die of a heart attack at a young age and leave my family to fend for themselves." I read somewhere that (allegedly) a lot of women prefer dad bods because it indicates they put their family first. I call bullshit. I would think that if they really put their family first they would make sure they could actually be in decent enough shape to be a protector, physically active parent for their kids,etc. Also its no secret that women feel less threatened by a "dad bod" because their partners are less likely to get hit on. The irony is. .scarcity is a thing. I guarantee the "dad bod" partner would be more likely to give into tempation and cheat than a physically fit man who gets approached regularly and has NO problem telling them he is married/taken. Anyway, just my personal take. Great video. .I absolutely love your content.
Muscular men have more sexual partners, more affairs, and more children. It's fine for women to say they prefer dad bods, but you should always look at what people do rather than what they say.
Women not in media or any comment section would be ready to have that conversation or acknowledgement of that fact so very true statement always watch what they do not what they say
It's absolutely comfort. Many women, when in a permanent ship of any kind will fatten up their man in an attempt to make them unattractive to other women. We have evolved to do this. I prefer a man in his lower teens body fat but it's not just because I think it's more attractive, it's because I know it's healthier. I'm in health and all I see are walking heart attack in dad bods😳 We need to learn to stay healthy together❤️
And male sperm count plummets when a guy gets into a long term stable relationship...is that becuase his partner doesn't want other women getting some? No, its his body.
It's also a badge of honor for wives to feed their husbands. Another reason I've heard is that raising children is exhausting so women bulk up their men so they can endure the sleepless nights. If she is happy cooking though how do you turn down a good meal😅.
Donald Trump is 80 n eats big macs, has a dad bod and has beautiful wives n children.... so its all genetic....
I have a friend who prefers the dad bod to a fit or athletic one. I was surprised to hear that from her because I prefer fit or athletic body type.
I will be 50 in December.
Since I was 15 I have been working out and trying to hit the correct macros for specific goals I have for that moment.
Something that took me a really long time to learn is to not talk about your diet just do it. Don’t talk about your training just do it and try to do it in secret.
My own mother had tried sabotaging my goals and ex girlfriend’s have done the same.
My wife of 23 years now went from 5’3” 105 lbs to 170lbs these days makes it tough but I just treat it all today like a spouse that’s secretly cheating on their husband or wife.
It’s the only way it will work in my life without my goals getting sabotaged .
People will notice a change in your physique and confidence and if they compliment you I just have to say thanks without going into any detail
I prefer the dad bod. I was not attracted to my husband when he was bodybuilding. I’ve never been the kind of girl who liked the muscle man calendars.
Women are not "attracted" to dad bods, period. The ones that claim they do either have a warped understanding of a dad bod (fit with a little extra fat) or they are straight up lying becuase they think it makes them sound more wholesome and less superficial. Its more likely that a women will remain in love with a fit man who eventually develops a dad bod especially if he provides love, resources, stability etc. However, this idea that a women wants to jump a dude who's obese and guzzling beers is silly.
💯
Fact.
Their warped idea of a dead body, is probably a man who was totally in perfect ripped shape, who then let themselves go a little bit. To them, that’s a dad body.
Keep telling yourself that kiddo. I’ve had both and I much prefer Dad bods. Muscles are not snuggly .
For most of my 20s and 30s I was in great shape and actively competed in Judo and local MMA. Almost no dates. It always came back around to what I was driving, that I was past 30 and still rented, the cost of my last vacation or the brand of watch I was wearing. Honestly hit 40 and just stopped, got tired of being given the run-around. It felt like I was constantly being asked a question that had no right answer.
It's good to know these things about instincts and body fat percentage, that is if you're trying to get to know women, if you're trying to attract women, however generally women are not as focused on visual appearance as men are. Your confidence and personality make a MUCH bigger difference on how attractive they see you. That, and your height, wealth, and status lol.