How to Respond When A Student Disrespects You

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 194

  • @SpicyExpressions
    @SpicyExpressions Рік тому +84

    Ooooeee they be so disrespectful not just to teachers but to each other it's sad to see. Thank you for creating a video like this

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +2

      You're welcome:)

    • @SpiritWolf209
      @SpiritWolf209 Рік тому +10

      This is my first year teaching and I was absolutely shocked at how mean and disrespectful the students are toward each other.

  • @rajeshadvani4194
    @rajeshadvani4194 3 місяці тому +30

    I come from India and teachers are respected as much as God. No room for all this in Indian classrooms - Thankfully.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  3 місяці тому +7

      Yes, count your blessings :)

    • @rainstew
      @rainstew 2 місяці тому +2

      Are you a teacher? If not then i think your view is skewed 😅 the students are as bad in behavior as anywhere else. Especially in city schools, regardless if its pvt or govt. They won't listen they would throw things, they'll talk back, they would ignore, they would make atrocious noises and wont listen when told that they are misbehaving.

    • @mizzbambam2008
      @mizzbambam2008 Місяць тому +3

      ​@@rainstewthey said in India. I'm sure the students behave differently based on what the teachers are allowed to do. Schools in the US were better when teachers were allowed to actually punish students.

    • @rainstew
      @rainstew Місяць тому +1

      @@mizzbambam2008 im from India and a teacher here in a city 💀 i wouldn't have replied otherwise.

  • @TheKnallkorper
    @TheKnallkorper 7 місяців тому +50

    I’m a kindergarten teacher and I’ve tried EVERYTHING. Call backs don’t work, asking for a level 0 doesn’t work. Taking a preferred activity away doesn’t work, calling parents comes back and bites me in the butt. I’m screaming into my pillow trying to teach a lesson for the 3 kids who care enough to learn how to build words

    • @watermelonraccoon636
      @watermelonraccoon636 7 місяців тому +9

      Same, kinder and everything, i cant figure it out at all

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому +12

      Hi @TheKnallkorper, see me an email, let's work this out :)

    • @bonniegracevictoria6968
      @bonniegracevictoria6968 3 місяці тому +2

      My heart goes out to you! That is a challenging age....can feel like babysitting 30 some kids.....

    • @Certified_Art_Teacher
      @Certified_Art_Teacher 3 місяці тому +4

      Calling out students in front of the entire class is a big no-no. They are in their comfort zone being around 2 other kids who share the same mentality. I pull that kid out into the hallway, get on their level visually and tell them what they have done and how behavior like that wont be tolerated. At the end, I tell them I'm not offended and lets start over when we get back into class. If need be, I'll get the principal to stand next to me while I correct them. Respect is mutual in the classroom, they will respect you if you respect them and remind them that.

    • @rajeshadvani4194
      @rajeshadvani4194 3 місяці тому +6

      @@Certified_Art_Teacher If you have to all this, when do you complete the coursework which has to be taught ? 🤔

  • @ElainaWilliams994
    @ElainaWilliams994 2 місяці тому +4

    Thank you so much! I just became a TA at a middle school after working at an elementary school for 11 years. I have never seen so much disrespect coming from children in my entire life.

  • @KMAJewelry1208
    @KMAJewelry1208 Рік тому +14

    Thank you for sharing this advice. I subbed for the first time in middle school and I was in complete shock. I’ll try this next time and I already know what consequences I need to set in place if they don’t stop🙃

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому

      You are so welcome! Wishing you success :)

    • @CR-pf1es
      @CR-pf1es Рік тому +2

      ditto to what you just said, I'm sub for paraeducator I and II _ please help us out with naming examples of consequences - thank you!

    • @RosalindWalker-p8i
      @RosalindWalker-p8i Місяць тому

      Please help some of us others out. What are your consequences?

    • @emtz4352
      @emtz4352 24 дні тому

      Ik, middle school is the worst for subs. It took me a couple of tries, but then for the sake of my mental health, now I stick to elementary. So much better and healthier!

  • @melanieevans9206
    @melanieevans9206 13 днів тому

    “Nothing is personal.” Yes, it is personal. When you go above and beyond and actually invest your heart into those kids and in their undeveloped lack of social “ skill” they break your heart. THAT- IS personal. I no longer have the heart for them.

  • @dawng1783
    @dawng1783 Рік тому +16

    Nothing is personal.

  • @marquitakey5555
    @marquitakey5555 9 днів тому

    Thank you thank you I drive BD ( four middle school boys to and from school) I am trying so hard make our ride somewhat pleasant.

  • @conradreyes5391
    @conradreyes5391 Рік тому +4

    Thank you for sharing this video, you gave me ways on how to manage a student.

  • @myoung6067
    @myoung6067 Рік тому +74

    The problem is, I've watched a gazillion youtube videos on classroom management and they all say "use your consequences" but that's the part I have trouble with. What should the consequences be? Nobody gives suggestions on consequences and as a new teacher, I don't know what to do. If there's no consequence, there's no classroom management.
    Edit: I'm coming back because I feel like my comment came across rude. I love your videos! I'm just frustrated, have a very difficult class and had a horrible day. I'm going to watch some of your other videos for ideas.

    • @anonymous-ms4lv
      @anonymous-ms4lv Рік тому +15

      I've seen teachers
      1) give a verbal warning
      2) send student to different class for a bit
      3) if behavior continues, send them to front office

    • @donettethorpe3187
      @donettethorpe3187 Рік тому +8

      Hi there,. I am teacher in Jamaica. So my consequences going to be their play time. Am gonna try that. Let them sit with me during their break.

    • @doreenchambers9579
      @doreenchambers9579 Рік тому +3

      Punishment is taking something they want, or iike away from them temporary.

    • @starforbes4596
      @starforbes4596 Рік тому +11

      Exactly no one seems to have the answers to logical consequences in classroom!

    • @AlumniQuad
      @AlumniQuad Рік тому +5

      @@starforbes4596 Sounds like a complete and utter dereliction of duty of college and university Education departments, state education departments, school districts, and individual school leadership.

  • @LaceyWires
    @LaceyWires Рік тому +5

    Question: I’m an art teacher, in a school that has not had an art teacher in two years. I don’t work for the school I work for a nonprofit whenever I showed up for my first day admin just put me in a room 20 minutes before my first class, and gave me a schedule of classes. I have K4 through eighth grade., because I don’t work for the school teachers are supposed to sit in during the period, and a lot of my teachers are frustrated because specials are usually a planning time for them, so sometimes they just dump them. On top of that this is a school that is entirely behavior problems. There are some classes that I still have not been able to get through expectations and I’ve been seeing them for three weeks now. I should also mention that I have a couple of education credits, but I am not an accredited teacher. I’m working really hard to come up with fun lessons to fill our 40 minutes with, but sometimes teachers won’t even bring their class by the time that I do get them we only have 20 minutes left, or there are a few students who still are testing me and are being majorly disruptive. So my question is how do I navigate all the negativity towards my art program and also establish rules and boundaries in the little time that I do see the students?

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +2

      Hi Lacey, here are some suggestions: In regards to the negativity, ask to have friendly conversations with the teachers (1:1 if you can) to talk about what's happening on both sides. Let the goal be to work out expectations and actions (i.e. compromise) that both of you can take to make it work for everyone. Let them know your plan with the 40 minutes and maybe they can lesson plan or grade papers while in your classroom so they can see some benefit to being timely. To establish rules and boundaries you will have to teach, practice and give feedback. I have online 1 hour workshop that shows you how to set up a classroom management system that you can customize. I'll leave the link. When I say teach, I mean introduce your rules an expectations, support your teaching with activities (maybe an art project or cartoon that demonstrates the rules or one rule at time) , also it's important to be proactive and review the rules and/or expectations before activity (if you can do it in a fun/creative way). This effective especially in the beginning. Then provide consistent encouraging and constructive feedback when they follow or don't follow the rules/expectations. I would be happy to help you come up with something specific to your needs if you want.
      ROOTING FOR YOU!!!
      Check out these links:
      michele-s-school-e13f.thinkific.com/courses/free-mini-workshop-strategies-for-the-first-month-of-school
      www.feedtheirneeds.com/classroom-management-framework-workshop
      www.feedtheirneeds.com/consultations

    • @tbaker729
      @tbaker729 3 місяці тому

      With any class, it's a good plan to have choices of different activities for students and examples of finished art work so students can see the end result. Maybe try having a few different stations for your classes? I have worked in classes where there's 5 different activities going on during a subject class. It also helps to differentiate the activity so every kid feels they can achieve something. Ask your classes what interests them. With Art classes there are plenty of options. Good luck!!

  • @thebehaviouristguy
    @thebehaviouristguy Рік тому +11

    This is great information. Thanks for sharing it with the community. Keep up the good work Michele.

  • @incamannngham3537
    @incamannngham3537 3 місяці тому

    Love this! It was the familiar cultural "That is not ok!" with the MOMMA LOOK for me! I use it and it does work! Firmness and love! Awesome video!

  • @LenaEarley-x3l
    @LenaEarley-x3l 2 місяці тому +1

    You always manage to make tough topics feel easy.

  • @Shinebright-by9dh
    @Shinebright-by9dh 11 місяців тому +15

    The problem in many districts if not all, students is never to be blame and teachers cant give consequences, it is only on paper but not in real practice. I have been written up for making a student after numerous warning to behave and i made him standing facing the wall for 8 mins. written up for this is a serious matter because teacher are not allowed to give consequences, this will take away teachers authority to disicpline thus could result a teacher who is going to care less because of not want to deal with the principal.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому

      Hi, I think the key in your situation is to find strategies that work at your school. I know that having a student face the wall for 8 minutes would have never been supported at the different schools, I've worked in. That's why I provide typically school-approved examples in my workshops. I do have some videos on my channel that give specific consequences, maybe they could work for you.

  • @31415926535equalspi
    @31415926535equalspi 9 місяців тому +62

    But they talk over you and don’t even listen

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  8 місяців тому +22

      Yes, you're right. It's a challenge. This is where attention-gettering strategies come in handy.

    • @ibphysicsclassroom
      @ibphysicsclassroom 7 місяців тому

      Respect is only with Asia and Africa. The few Africans that mingled with the west we are really struggling to put up with them. The human right spoilt everything

    • @Certified_Art_Teacher
      @Certified_Art_Teacher 3 місяці тому +10

      If you've addressed it to the student(s), and it continues, then it's time to visit the principal with them.

    • @kaymure
      @kaymure 3 місяці тому +2

      @@Certified_Art_Teacherexactly

    • @shafe098
      @shafe098 3 місяці тому +1

      I did that...but still stdnts are misbehaving

  • @maverickhistorian6488
    @maverickhistorian6488 3 місяці тому +2

    As a.person with Aspergers Syndrome, I was bullied mercilessly and treated in a most appalling manner by my teachers. I went to school in the UK in the seventies and eighties, I still bear the psychological scars that will never heal, and I'm now in my mid fifties. Some how I managed to educate myself and I eventually earned a Bachelor of arts degree in history. The thing is, I was always a good kid and respected the teachers, but I was also disproportionately punished compared to the other children.

    • @hiendarinenkoray
      @hiendarinenkoray 2 місяці тому +1

      Those teachers were not 1) good teachers 2) good people. They were ablists. Sorry it happened to you. I've been mistreated at school in the 2010s as well

  • @CocoChanelle-1
    @CocoChanelle-1 Рік тому +6

    👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾Keep it coming!

  • @juliuswilliams1438
    @juliuswilliams1438 Рік тому +16

    When something is not ok and won’t be tolerated, what does that mean. It seems there aren’t consequences that they even care about.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +6

      Hi, when I say it's not ok and it will not be tolerated, that is communicating to the student that their behavior will not go unaddressed in my classroom. That also means there will be consistent consequences coming their way. Sometimes I feel like it's a student's job to make it seem like the consequence does not matter on the front end. The consequences I've used for even the most challenging students were not effective because they were severe but because I was consistent.

  • @themindestmonarch_
    @themindestmonarch_ 7 місяців тому +6

    Maybe it is up to us to help TEACH what respect looks like so we can have a respectful generation! 🙏🏻🌞❤️ thank you for your videos.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому +2

      Yesss!! That's is what I have been advocating. Or at least TEACH what respect looks like in a class setting. We can't afford to wait for the respect to simply show up in our current society.

  • @jungletheme2094
    @jungletheme2094 6 місяців тому +2

    New teacher here, thank you.

  • @darlenewright3847
    @darlenewright3847 Рік тому +1

    Thank you so much for this information! I will be utilizing this site!!!

  • @OliverGearhart-j3n
    @OliverGearhart-j3n 2 місяці тому

    You always make tough topics feel easy!

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Місяць тому

      I try. I have found it to be easier when I am prepared mentally and strategically :)

  • @mpmcd81
    @mpmcd81 Місяць тому +2

    Outstanding video. Bad academic behaviors lead to bad consequences. This is just axiomatic.
    Not every action needs immediate action. Some do. Natural consequences can be a great teacher.

  • @correct-wb1je
    @correct-wb1je Місяць тому

    Great advice thank you

  • @elizabethcollins4537
    @elizabethcollins4537 8 місяців тому +2

    Does this work? If so, why? How? While getting into a power struggle is pointless (and never works), I am not convinced that this method is going to get results...the disrespect is so bad.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  8 місяців тому +1

      You're right the disrespect is bad. I was not sure these methods worked until I was forced to try them myself (i.e. out of options). And the disrespect was out of control! But when I did I was surprised by how much my mindset played a part in the success of using them. You have to take a risk and try it out, I did.
      NOTE: Not saying this works with every student.

  • @StaceySummers-k9e
    @StaceySummers-k9e Рік тому +7

    I found this video extremely helpful! Thank you!

  • @patricemcjett3183
    @patricemcjett3183 9 місяців тому

    Thank you for your professional advice. I thought everything that you said was appropriate and wise. However, I would Really like to see your suggestions depicted with Real dialog that I can utilize. Please and thank you!

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  8 місяців тому +1

      Are you talking about actual verbiage to use in the classroom?

  • @neetaramesh7512
    @neetaramesh7512 Місяць тому

    This was very helpful.

  • @dotcosmo9238
    @dotcosmo9238 Місяць тому

    How did you become a behavior strategist? Im interested in that career path!

  • @roneddy6976
    @roneddy6976 Рік тому +2

    I would like to up my skills as it relates to student behavior. Students sleeping in class and can't be involved with learning activity. 14 year old boys/Girls who refuse to participate in class.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому

      Yeah, this is challenging! Thanks for sharing.

  • @jobethk588
    @jobethk588 Рік тому +3

    Great advice.

  • @asmitaawaghade9575
    @asmitaawaghade9575 Рік тому +2

    Thanks for this... 🙏

  • @yoreshirechristianpreschool
    @yoreshirechristianpreschool 2 місяці тому +1

    So brilliant

  • @windybrown2122
    @windybrown2122 3 місяці тому

    Excellent advise 💫

  • @autumnskillman2767
    @autumnskillman2767 7 місяців тому +1

    This was very helpful, thank you.

  • @GodWokeMeUp
    @GodWokeMeUp 9 місяців тому +20

    It's not just teachers.... We got them in my neighborhood. I had to go outside (because I heard a child cursing like a sailor) and told this 11 year old to stop cussing around the other children (my son is 7 and was out there). He was so horrible and rude. He's like, "I don't have to listen to you, you're not my mom and I can do whatever the hell I want!" Oh my gosh I couldn't believe it... I tried reasoning with him and explaining why he shouldn't curse. He absolutely didn't care. He just kept on and then I said, "I've never seen you in this neighborhood before, where's your mother?" He refused to tell me and just kept talking back. He was just awful... I literally ended up saying,"You're so rude and disrespectful! What kind of people are raising you!? You should just go back home because other parents don't want that behavior rubbing off on their children." 😅 My neighbor ended up coming out and saying he should stop with the foul language too...but he just spoke back to him too. I just can't believe it. Absolutely horrible kids and no respect for anyone. I just don't know what we're supposed to do outside of the classroom and home when we see them out running the streets and being so awful. Realistically there's no repercussions for them at all. I hate to say this.... But parents are failing these kids. That little boy had a brand new bike, a mohawk helmet... And so I know he's not going without. However his parents probably spoil him and ignore him which is why he's so awful.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому +1

      You're right. It's not just in the schools. We are seeing troubling behaviors in different areas of our community.

    • @BinoDist
      @BinoDist 2 місяці тому +2

      All of this came about after children were seen as special and Unicef said we must listen to children but no-one told the children they must listen to their elders.
      "You're not the boss of me" came out of one boy's mouth. I marched him to the principal and he rapidly found out that yes, I was the boss of him. Hoorah for a sensible principal but unfortunately, too often, their hands are tied and we all end up being forced to be beholden to the potty mouthed little dictators.

    • @bernardohiomoje9220
      @bernardohiomoje9220 Місяць тому

      Once upon a time the cane corrected everything faster

    • @shanninrenee8617
      @shanninrenee8617 Місяць тому +1

      Spoiled kids are the worst behaved in my experience.

    • @jamesbaggett7223
      @jamesbaggett7223 17 днів тому

      @@BinoDist Had one cuss me out on Friday and what really infuriated him was the fact he wasn't the only one swearing, just happened to be the only one I heard. I tried to tell him on the way to the office that it wasn't the correct behavior and was told "Shut up and stop talking to me" and then he proceeds to bellyache to any one of his friends in the hallway about what got him in trouble. To his credit he did come and apologize to me later on. But several of his classmates think it's comical to set off the T.Aide so they deliberately say disrespectful things to me, ask inappropriate questions....it's depressing. I come home and have a drink once a week to decompress from their antics.

  • @Lookitsapanda24
    @Lookitsapanda24 Місяць тому +2

    What about when the consequence doesn’t matter to them even when it’s implemented? Parents who don’t care and blame you? Or when a large portion of a class feed off one another and there are too many to single out and consequences aren’t realistic given the number of kids who disrespect or disrupt?
    Singular instances of disrespect are easy to manage. But a large class feeding off of one another as far as volume and meeting classroom expectations, it feels impossible to regain and maintain order and teach.
    I’ve tried everything I can think of. Seating charts… revised multiple times… silent lunch… losing a portion of their PE. Contacting home and involving admin. These kids enjoy ILC because they normally get to sit in there and do nothing but play computer games or watch UA-cam. It seems like an impossible battle when there’s almost no option to apply effective consequences to students who deserve them.

  • @makavelli480
    @makavelli480 6 місяців тому +1

    What about if you have lost control of your classroom?

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  4 місяці тому

      Hi, that's a loaded question, but here are 3 key starter steps: 1. Reflect on the class misbehaviors, and choose the top 3. 2. Determine what perspective, social, behavior or academic skills they need to reduce or overcome the top 3. Create a plan to teach and reinforce the top 3. Bonus step: Join my email list where I offer workshops for teachers. I am adding more this year. See the description area for the email list link.

  • @Channelx503
    @Channelx503 6 місяців тому +12

    It’s worse when The Principal or Assistant Principal ask students to tell their version of a story involving a teacher and what the students say is the GOSPEL TRUTH. You better best believe respect has gone out of the window.

    • @rajeshadvani4194
      @rajeshadvani4194 3 місяці тому +1

      @@Channelx503 Very Sad. Students will always spice up and cut a sorry figure for themselves. A relook is an absolute must in the system. A teacher is also human and is trusted with the noble job of transformation of children to good educated human beings. Hardly a reward for a job like that.

    • @BinoDist
      @BinoDist 2 місяці тому +1

      Been there, lived through that. The worst behaved kid from the bottom stream class was believed over me, never mind that I'd been at the school for a decade.
      A colleague covered herself by always obtaining witness statements from other kids in the room. This, of course, wasted valuable teaching time but at least it made it difficult for the student to be seen as being in the right where she was, of course, in the wrong.

    • @bernardohiomoje9220
      @bernardohiomoje9220 Місяць тому

      😂 The customer, they say are always right

  • @asmasmc6235
    @asmasmc6235 6 місяців тому +1

    Would you please give examples of everything you talk about. Thank you the video was great

  • @2_blAck
    @2_blAck 6 місяців тому +2

    I’m staff support my students know I will write you up so quickly. I work with Seniors I will snatch that GPA down some notches. And erase those senior privileges🤷🏽‍♀️ They don’t play with me now

  • @glennwatson3313
    @glennwatson3313 Рік тому +2

    I teach in Alabama and have done so for over 30 years. My students are better behaved than they have ever been.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому

      That is amazing!!! Woot Woot!

    • @CR-pf1es
      @CR-pf1es Рік тому

      If so then explain what you do to keep it so, dont just brag for nothing...thank you for tips

    • @glennwatson3313
      @glennwatson3313 Рік тому +2

      @@CR-pf1es Its not me. I'm terrible at classroom management. Its the kids. They are just very well behaved, for the most part.

  • @zaebos0079
    @zaebos0079 Рік тому +2

    You're amazing, your videos are extremely helpful! Greetings from Vienna

  • @williampowell3378
    @williampowell3378 3 місяці тому

    Excellent

  • @kevinjones283
    @kevinjones283 Рік тому +1

    I love this video!!

  • @MrPk266
    @MrPk266 8 місяців тому +1

    I really needed this message, thank you. I'm taking notes.

  • @silversurfer4441
    @silversurfer4441 8 місяців тому

    Honestly, I think the best approach is to be like Data in Star Trek-and android with no feelings but instead approach your assignment goals and classroom management strategies with patience and with a long-term mindset. Select one of several disrespecting students at a time for focus. Go through the tiers. Ask for private time to discuss. If that fails, talk to parents. If that fails, talk to admin and a parent conference. And if all that fails, repeat again and again until the student realizes you're just as steadfast at making their lives miserable as they are yours. In time they'll get the message.

  • @jbjamie24
    @jbjamie24 5 місяців тому +2

    This is why they say teaching is a calling not everyone can be a teacher if you don't treat your kids like equal humans too that have different backgrounds and level of emotion.... If you can't handle it don't be a teacher this is not just a Job! I'm talking to some here that moans and complains sweeping generalization that all kids now are like that, You are the teacher teach what Respect looks like in a classroom setting not embarrass but correct them in a respectable way too.

    • @BinoDist
      @BinoDist 2 місяці тому

      Thanks for your suggestions. Have you been teaching long?

  • @sheseesfortress1719
    @sheseesfortress1719 6 місяців тому +1

    Thank you for the wise tips, and it was short and to the point as well. I'm a contract private music teacher, and I have experienced a bit of disrespect from a student, who is not being as co-operative as I would like, he is smart, but I think he does'nt understand the meaning of practicing with good habits, I'm going to try to comunicate that, but he has this level of disrespect, that I'm trying to understand why is he being that way, I feel like he has a know it all type of vibe. Or who cares about this lesson it won't affect my grades. (I teach private lesson at a private school) so anyways, I will have to learn to work on my communication skills, and hopefully see a improvement.

  • @sharperfisel
    @sharperfisel Рік тому +16

    There’s really no point guys. I’m a teacher and students are shit these days. There’s nothing you can do. Times have changed.

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +12

      There is ALWAYS something we can do!! Yes, times have changed and our students are a reflection of that. However, there are thousands of teachers who are willing to step up to the plate and be the change. I get your frustration. And NOBODY is saying it is easy, but giving up on our students as a whole is not an option. PERIOD.

    • @samuelamizade9395
      @samuelamizade9395 8 місяців тому +6

      Many of the students come from home already convicted that they do whatever they want cause this is how their parents raised them. The bad behaviour has provinience and it is the kids home.

    • @emtz4352
      @emtz4352 24 дні тому +1

      I agree with you- many times the disrespectful behavior is a reflection of the parent or home environment. Many times, you meet the parent then understand why their kid acts the way they do. Unfortunately, teachers are more than ever expected to be the “parent” nowadays. That’s why I like how in this video, she mentions to not take it personal and see it as a teaching opportunity. I like to tell students, their classroom is also their home and I like to make learning connections to their lives outside of school bc they need to hear it clearly. If parents don’t teach them manners, then they have us to learn from.

    • @Peg-rm4jx
      @Peg-rm4jx 3 дні тому

      Secular Humanism has ruined schools

  • @deniseralonso5289
    @deniseralonso5289 4 дні тому

    What if it's three students at the same time feeding into each other? How do I handle all at the same time?

  • @brendasmith6505
    @brendasmith6505 Рік тому +2

    Great information!! Thanks so much for sharing.

  • @morganevans246
    @morganevans246 3 місяці тому

    Good advice for high school

  • @Maree-clurr
    @Maree-clurr 9 місяців тому

    what do you do if there are two students who are being disrespectful to me and then arguing with each other at the same time. This happens after they’ve come in after lunch. I have tried everything but I really don’t know what to do. I’m not a teacher but a classroom assistant

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому

      Hi, not sure what the behavior is exactly, but I would determine which one is the most disruptive first and address that one. Then address the second one later in the day or week.

  • @markmcmahon8338
    @markmcmahon8338 7 місяців тому +1

    Thank you for the very helpful and practical strategies you shared. These are very realistic and treat students with respect while still holding them to high behavior expectations!

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  6 місяців тому

      You're welcome :)Glad it was helpful!

  • @woowiii
    @woowiii 10 місяців тому

    When teaching secondary school students I used to struggle with student backchat after I had alerted them of their disrespectful behaviour - I had many instances where students would follow up with 'i don't care' when I verbally corrected their behaviour, and I would pull them up on this which would escalate the issue further. Would it be better to ignore this and carry on with my teaching? And if so, I'm not sure if this would send the message to the rest of the class that it is acceptable to do this?

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  8 місяців тому +1

      Hi, I don't know what "pull them up means", but when I am working towards shaping a specific behavior, a few things...(1) I fully expect students to respond negatively because change can be hard and they may be using this response to discourage me from keeping the boundary or expectation set. , so I don't not let those initial responses deter me (2) I make sure I have taught, modeled, possibly role played the replacement behaviors. (3) I continue to give feedback (correction, redirection or encouragement) consistently, however I may change the format to planned ignoring or signals to decrease the disruptive impact on the class. But also explaining ahead of time that just because I did not respond in the moment does not mean the behavior was not noticed or accepted. (4) I follow up with 1:1 conversations with the student to get an idea of why they are having difficulty or pre-determined mostly classroom-based consequences from my classroom management system.
      Hope you can pull some nuggets from this :)

  • @zohrehnemani9508
    @zohrehnemani9508 Рік тому

    Could you please give more examples
    Thank you

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому

      Not sure what type of examples you mean. Examples of student behaviors? Or strategies?

  • @nnumesiumesii2123
    @nnumesiumesii2123 Рік тому

    Been there done that but these methods really don't work for my students.

  • @Robier1447
    @Robier1447 3 місяці тому +18

    What about when other students start chiming in with additional disrespect to support that student. It disrupts the entire class. Plus it’s pretty scary to have 20 students screaming at you.

    • @kris78787
      @kris78787 3 місяці тому +3

      If this is a daily occurrence, I would just quit. No one deserves to be treated like trash everyday

    • @Robier1447
      @Robier1447 3 місяці тому +2

      @@kris78787 Sadly, it’s not always easy to do.

    • @firesagi
      @firesagi 3 місяці тому +3

      @@Robier1447im in the same situation after changing to a new school… highly discouraged and unmotivated but I can’t quit due to financial issues… agree with the video to take the pupils' disrespectful behaviours less personally, which is a tough but a positive mindset shift.

    • @kris78787
      @kris78787 3 місяці тому +1

      @@Robier1447 I understand, but keep trying and looking to find another career if the verbal abuse is ongoing. No one deserves to be treated like trash everyday

    • @Robier1447
      @Robier1447 2 місяці тому +1

      @@kris78787 It’s not always that easy.

  • @morestuff75
    @morestuff75 6 місяців тому +3

    I’m here because I’ve been insulted by people that are younger than I am and I always wanted to know how to handle it also to put the exact words in a searchable context.

  • @bernardohiomoje9220
    @bernardohiomoje9220 Місяць тому

    I think rude students behaviour can be traced back to the parents who failed to instill the right behaviours in their kids. Even the government has taken away the parents ablity to do that as well. In the 80's children were more respectful.

  • @jamesbaggett7223
    @jamesbaggett7223 17 днів тому

    I'm a teacher's aide at a middle school and to be honest none of this really works in a group setting. I have a few groups of students that just refuse to be respectful, or to follow instruction. If I attempt to encourage corrective behavior I'm told to "Mind my business" or "You're not a REAL teacher" and my personal favorite "You need to check your caucasity"....The current generation coming up has zero interest in learning, and essentially no respect for others or themselves. It's infuriating, depressing, and heart breaking at the same time.

  • @ShanzoShanzo-v5u
    @ShanzoShanzo-v5u 3 місяці тому

    My best friend is currently having this problem & I want to help them come up with ways to deal with such students in a positive manner without letting them walk all over you. They're an art teacher & the school they work at has a rule where teachers cannot scold or hit children. And while they would never hit a student, being told that they aren't supposed to "scold" the students leaves room for confusion on how they're supposed to respond to rude students. They don't know how to deal with disrespectful students in an acceptable way by teacher standards & the girl's friends seem to be just as rude as her. They often ask inappropriate questions or even try to square up on the teacher. Slamming on my friend's desk and asking "Are you deaf?" in a rather rude tone when they ask the student to repeat a question they didn't hear the first time. And my best friend doesn't know how to deal with this because of the rules put in place & no one is giving them an answer on how to deal with it. Now from what I know, the main student we talked about has siblings both older & younger than her & the siblings aren't rude. She's 10 years old & she's a middle child. Her brother described her as "the troublemaker". I don't know what her home life is like, but I know that her friends are extremely rude. How does my friend respond to students like this in a healthy way that won't get them (the teacher) in trouble?

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  3 місяці тому

      Hi great question :) Let’s start with the definition of scold. To scold means to reprimand or criticize someone angrily, often for a mistake or wrongdoing. It involves speaking to someone in a harsh or disapproving manner to express dissatisfaction with their behavior.
      Two key words I see are “angrily” and “harsh”. So would say, give correction and redirection in a calm matter-of-fact tone of voice. Almost as if she is teaching a math equation.
      Second, I would focus more on redirection when giving feedback to the students. This means responding with speaking on the behavior you want the student to demonstrate instead of the behavior they are demonstrating.
      For example, if a students yells, “Are you deaf?”, she can tell the student what she wants to see instead. For example, she can respond (in a matter-of-fact tone, ie. don’t meet their same verbal energy) “ When you are ready to speak in a respectful tone I will respond”, “Change your tone of voice”, or “ I don’t respond to rudeness”…followed by moving on to another student or activity or simply ignore until student speaks appropriately. [no anger or harshness=scolding here]
      A few other examples:
      When student yells…….”Use inside voice, thank you”
      When student running around….”Move to your seat, starting now..3, 2, 1”
      When student not working…”Pick up your pencil and begin with #1, thank you”
      If the admin still disapproves or does not support this method, give specific scenarios and ask for the effective way to respond. I do offer teacher consultations, so if she needs further or more specific help here is a link: feedtheirneeds.com/consultations/

  • @luxuryforfun396
    @luxuryforfun396 Рік тому

    new sub, i like your chanel. question!
    If is student communicated inappropriately how you would respond?
    What would you do if the student ever persisted would you involve parents and the principle?
    thanks

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +5

      When students communicate inappropriately, I tend to respond in 3 tiers.
      First time: I verbally correct the behavior, then redirect behavior. For example, " That's not acceptable (or you are being disrespectful/ inappropriate, etc.), instead you can say... or you can respond with (Fill In The Blank...)
      Second time: In the moment I will give the student options. For example, "Try again." or "Change your tone" or " You can... or be quiet." Later in the period or day, I will have a brief 1:1 conversation where I ask the student about the behavior, remind them of the expectation or rule then ask if they are willing to change their behavior or follow the direction.
      Third time: I may or may not verbally redirect briefly. But usually I simply implement a specific consequence from my classroom management system.
      I would probably communicate with the parent after the third time (which not a consequence from my perspective).
      I would involve the principal if the behavior significantly disrupts instruction for the class or if the behavior escalates to something more disruptive.
      Hope this helps:)

  • @Shaara1
    @Shaara1 2 місяці тому +1

    This only work with obedient kids. If they are rude they want to insult you on purpuse. It's obvious they aren't worried about the consequences because they know they will ignore it too.
    I asked a boy 3 times to swap seat in class because he couldn't stop talking and laughing loud. He just said no. He doesn't want to. End of story. I lost. They won't do anything they don't want to. They dictate the rules. 16 year olds.
    The other, a smaller boy from another class, turnd his back while I was informing him about tomorrows program. I call him back, he looks at me with cold eyes and turns back just to close the door on my face so he doesn't have to hear me.

  • @nosheenansari450
    @nosheenansari450 Рік тому +2

    students cant dare to disrespect me... i hv been a teacher of teenagers sincd 23 years.

    • @kaycampbell364
      @kaycampbell364 Рік тому

      what's the secret

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Рік тому +1

      I think she/he hinted at it. With 23 years of experience and still in teaching, you will definitely pick up some effective strategies and practices to manage student behaviors.

  • @jansonciereszko4968
    @jansonciereszko4968 2 місяці тому

    I only disrespect teachers when they're disrespectful themselves

  • @Sunflowerbunny8388
    @Sunflowerbunny8388 4 місяці тому +1

    The thing is I know I'm the problem but I don't know how to fix it

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  4 місяці тому

      Hi there, I get it. If you want to talk it out and get some suggestions/strategies. I do offer teacher consultations. Here is the link if you are interested: feedtheirneeds.com/consultations/

  • @silversurfer4441
    @silversurfer4441 8 місяців тому +1

    And when you say, that's not acceptable in the classroom, they reply, "F"-YOU!

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  8 місяців тому +2

      I say don't be moved by their initial response. In fact, expect a negative reaction to boundaries being set with challenging students. Continue to be consistent in using your management system. I have taught and worked with many students who started with and "FU" to end with "Thank you", " I love your class", and " You're the best".

  • @janacardwell875
    @janacardwell875 Місяць тому

    No this will not work!

  • @FlyTy5
    @FlyTy5 6 місяців тому +1

    I feel link I’ll need to put this on my desk to guide me in those moments. What do you think about sharing these steps with students at the beginning of the year?

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  4 місяці тому

      Hi! I don't believe in waiting until you see or experience disrespect before you address respect when it comes to teaching. So, yes, I think it's a great idea to share with your students steps on how to be respectful to you, their peers, and other staff in the first month of school. You can also have them add their own steps if they're appropriate, also they can roleplay and practice in different activities as well.

  • @absbse
    @absbse Місяць тому

    2 hours detention straight away for anyone that messes around after 2 warnings they will never do it again

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  Місяць тому

      Wow, when do they serve the 2 hours?

    • @absbse
      @absbse Місяць тому

      @@FeedTheirNeeds after school

  • @user-if1in3he2k
    @user-if1in3he2k Рік тому +2

    👍👍👍

  • @zedphotoediting
    @zedphotoediting 6 місяців тому

    One thing i noticed is that pupils don't like bice teachers they wabt rude and those who don't tolerate nonsense

  • @davidross5305
    @davidross5305 6 місяців тому

    What are some strategies for not taking things personally from students disrespect? Ive had one student in particular who has been giving me a really hard time and it seems targeted at me

    • @FeedTheirNeeds
      @FeedTheirNeeds  4 місяці тому +1

      Hi David, here are a few: 1. Make a decision to not take it personal, even if you are the target. Refuse to carry it in your life backpack 2. Remember that the disrespectful behavior often speaks more about the student's inability to cope and communicate appropriately than you ability as a teacher. 3. Talk it out with someone, it has helped me to talk it out with a TRUSTED respected friend and/or peer. Allow them to ask clarifying questions, it may help you get some insight. Hope this helps :)

    • @davidross5305
      @davidross5305 4 місяці тому

      @@FeedTheirNeeds thanks so much, this is really helpful advice!

  • @yamhweeyeo3089
    @yamhweeyeo3089 11 місяців тому +8

    Sorry, your suggestions are well-meant but ineffective.

    • @tamikafreeman2422
      @tamikafreeman2422 5 місяців тому

      Tell us how you do it, then

    • @catst9927
      @catst9927 4 місяці тому

      Admittedly, I'm not a teacher. But I could see that there might be some issues with the advice in the video.
      If you go up to a student saying that you're a [insert negative term here], you are making it personal. You're not calling out the behavior, you're saying that that student is rotten. If they don't feel like they're rotten, they're going to call you out on it. You can tell them to calm down, but since you're not giving them strategies to that just adds to the tension that the students already feeling from being directly insulted by you. I anticipate that this could cause a very heated fight. If the student does already have a mentality that the rotten to the core, then you've also just contributed to the student's mental health issues. In fact, I think I was one of those students. I didn't think I would live past 18 partly because of teachers doing this method. It certainly not going to matter what I was taught in high school if I'm not going to live long enough to actually use it.

    • @catst9927
      @catst9927 4 місяці тому

      ​@@tamikafreeman2422I'll try to levy you. In fairness, I'm not a teacher. But I also am looking at these videos for a reason.
      I'll try to bullet point it.
      -anticipate
      -engagement
      -look at the emotion first
      -offer support
      -prevent
      Things that you do can contribute to behavior within their classroom. For example, if the rules are not clearly stated, then don't expect them to be followed. If the rules are unreasonable, or vague, don't expect them to be followed. You can do this by having your first day making those rules with your students, or just use your best judgment and see what works. If it doesn't work, it will be added to prevent.
      If you do not make your lessons engaging, then no one will engage with you. Try to make it an active activity. Not one with a worksheet. Make it so that it engages with the students want for fun. Another teacher I knew to teach One of the world wars in history class, designed her classroom for today to look similar to what the battlefield would have looked like. This created curiosity among the students and everyone was engaged. If you make the lessons engaging, then the students will engage.
      If you tell a student to do something, and they get upset. The first thing you need to do is address the upset, not the something. "I see that you're feeling [blank]". Then you should move on to a calming activity. Such as breathing exercises. You can also make this a game as well. The one that I use is the fire breathing dragon. Breathe in to get all of that fire for 3 seconds, and then we're going to blow out the fire for another 3. It doesn't have to be the breathing exercises, and I would suggest mixing it up, as if you're constantly having to do this activity, it may become apparent that you're on a script. That would make you come off as inauthentic, so try to look up more calming activities other than breathing exercises. This also shows to the student that you care about them, and they might care about you in return. Also, if you're doing breathing exercises with the child, it will also give you a chance to calm down and look at the situation objectively.
      So, a student has just brought up a concern. They may have not have said it in a nice way, but they have brought up an issue with your classroom. This is something that should be added to the prevent section. But just for right now, try to offer them support. They are struggling with the assignment. If you need to ask more whys, do so, as he can help you provide better support by getting down to the root problem. So if a student gets upset you by you looking at their worksheet. You can ask them why, or if you figured out the issue. You can offer support. To try to make up a scenario. A student doesn't fill out the worksheet, but rather just stares at it. They get upset at you every single time you come near. By asking why, you realize that the reason why the student doesn't do the worksheet, is because they feel like they're going to fail anyways. So there's no point in trying. In the moment, you could offer support by doing the worksheet step by step with them.
      So now, that you've identified an issue with the classroom. It's now time to add that to the anticipate section. Or I'm going to call this prevention since this is a direct response to a behavior. So some students feel that the worksheets are too hard, or does they don't really understand the material before being questioned on it. You could lower the difficulty, or you can make it clear to class that you're there to help. Acknowledge the difficulty of the worksheet, and tell your students before we give out the worksheet that if they need help with anything that they can ask.

    • @catst9927
      @catst9927 4 місяці тому

      For at least what I am trying to do with these videos, that comment above is what I'm trying to aim for. Honestly, I don't think it's worth risking any student's mental health for them to pay attention. And, even though I'm not a teacher I can cite some teachers that got this method to work
      So I mentioned a history teacher who used engagement to teach about world history. I also remember a teacher who actually got me engaged in government. The only thing I disagree with is how much it would be levied against grades. I don't think he actually was going to change anyone's grade based on the results of an activity. But again, I would rather not risk it, as grades are very important to students as it will directly affect their future. There was one activity where one side of the room said that they get a higher grade on the activity, the more words they found in the crossword. The other half of the room got told that it doesn't matter how well you do it the crossword, you'll get the same grade no matter what. He pointed out that The students who was not pressured to do well in the crossword, took their time doing the crossword. Those who grades were attached, got a lot more panicked. This was the teach the difference between capitalism and communism. It's a lesson I still remember today, because I was engaged with it. Again though, I would not levy people's grades though. That history teacher did not have to make it about grades, to engage. there are other teachers I had in the past who Levy grades in such a bad manner, that all I can remember is how much I hated them. I don't remember a single thing they taught, only that they were a bad teacher.

  • @stelladavis7832
    @stelladavis7832 2 місяці тому

    If the kid s one short of a six pack, nothing will work, usually the parents are nutters and you having them for a bit five days a week only makes it worse.

  • @marcmeinzer8859
    @marcmeinzer8859 7 місяців тому

    It’s too late in the day to be trying to finesse this sort of nonsense. And if the kids don’t have any respect then it automatically follows that they don’t have any for you either. Kids who only respect physical violence are uneducable and perhaps belong in daycare for the maladjusted but certainly in nobody’s classroom. It is inevitable at this point that in person teachers will be automated out of existence, and that the only remaining teachers will be the ones inside the kid’s computers who perhaps consult with hundreds of kids per day. What the school will still have is custodians, security guards, child care works and perhaps one hourly tutor per computer lab, and these tutors will not be teachers who develop curriculum or lecture but merely help the kids when they get stuck. And there will no longer be grades either.

  • @AAhmed-hk3jg
    @AAhmed-hk3jg 7 місяців тому +1

    satan is busy.

  • @necek6317
    @necek6317 6 місяців тому +2

    Thank you for sharing educator in training ❤ I’m trying to do better as well bc I can come off strong with delivery and tone and with an attitude bc of the disrespect the student gives. I wanted to find another approach, so thank you. I think a meeting should be had between me and the student. Even though I was minding my own business when all of a sudden that student said what are you doing to me bc I was sitting down thinking about what to do next and that student kept a grudge ever since, and tells my what she is not going to do.