10 Principles of Healing from Trauma
Вставка
- Опубліковано 4 жов 2024
- If you want to know the story behind what I've been saying, I had a difficult experience with LSD which I reacted negatively to. I got sectioned as a result, the stress of which triggered a psychotic break. These are the principles I've taken from the experiences I had.
![overcoming malignant shame [cc]](/img/n.gif)
“My depression is the most faithful mistress I have known - no wonder, then, that I return the love.”
― Kierkegaard, Either/Or.
Fuck that shit. I definitely do not return the love, as there isn't any love to return. I take my fistful of antipsychotics and antidepressants every day and have never been happier to be rid of chronic depression, and still almost daily marvel at how much I can actually do and accomplish when I'm not chronically depressed.
The world needs more people like Cameron
@@peri5966 ...and fewer people like you. Dinlo.
"And he said unto them, Ye are from beneath; I am from above: ye are of this world; I am not of this world." - John 8: 23
@@tubthump "I will make a man more precious than fine gold" - Isaiah 13: 12
As someone who is just starting to recognize and work through a multitude of traumatic experiences, this was honestly a huge weight off my shoulders to watch. Thank you for this, and all the best in your continued healing and thriving.
Hey sorry if this is offensive or rude, but I'm autistic and your very plain, unemotional presentation was really helpful. A lot of times people present this kind of information with a lot of emotional flourishes and it makes it hard to listen to. I needed this advice and a more sentimental presentation would have made it hard for me to listen.
@@atozed932 people misconstrue 'flat expression' with aloof arrogance inside... But its not, its just flat externalising right?
I totally agree.
Can we just stop pathologizing everything? You are just a factual, logical person, moreso than average. Often this gets in the way of being able to relate to other people. I think the 'high functioning autism' label does people more harm than good.
[cw: sexual assault]
I'm still recovering from the trauma of being repeatedly sexually assaulted over the course of last year, being homeless, then moving across the world. It's been a journey for sure. The way my mind copes is through derealization, which ends up making me feel like I'm in some kind of dream whenever I'm stressed.
I had to look up what being "sectioned" meant, which turned out to be more of a British term. Solidarity, comrade. Glad to see you seem to be coping well.
You're a sweet pie of a comrade. Thanks for opening up to us. I've dealt with traumatic experiences as well and listening to you (a person I look up to) talk about it is very comforting. Keep it up, brother ♥
My wife and I are both survivors of some horritic traumas that we still content with. As such, out of all the videos and people talking about these experiences, I must say, you are one of the most sincere and insightful. So many videos on trauma survival or mental illness feel so contrived. Posdibly becaause so many focus on a more capitalist concept. Get well enough to get back to work and being another cog in this society. Or a complete absense of personal understanding. I am sure many of these people have good intentions, they just lack what you do. Thank you.
Thank you for taking the time to make this video!! Your analysis is so insightful. Thank you
Emotional/psychological wounds are often deep and will remain infected until opened, drained and healed properly.
I am glad you did this, I really appreciate it, both you opening up about your own experiences and you genuine desire to help others. I don't want to diminish that at all, so please keep that in mind. These aren't objections, just clarifications and revisions and extensions on things you may not have thought of.
Some of these principles are contingent. You did mention a couple times about having a decent circle of friends, and that is important to recognize, but a lot of people are just not going to know how to deal with someone like me, talking openly about something like 7 months of "administrative segregation" (yes, it is exactly what it sounds like, they just don't call it "solitary confinement" anymore, because calling it by a different name makes it somehow less horrible). The way I behaved *during* this experience will tend to make people look at me like I have no sense. The CO's working the admin-seg block weren't even *allowed* to talk to us. If you asked for the time, they'd put their watch against the window. After a while, that got to me. So, I would wait until they brought the lunch trays, and I'd throw mine back out the trap (a small opening in the door) at them, because when it has been months since you've heard a voice other than your own, you just want someone to say something to you, even if it is "STOP RESISTING!!!!" while they pin you to the floor with a shield.
If you've read this far, then (congratulations?) you have more of a stomach for this shit than most.
I don't think there will ever be a time when I've truly "adjusted" to this, and I am pretty sure I'm not supposed to. I don't want to live in a world where this kind of shit is just something to be incorporated into ones psyche. I'd rather let it further radicalize me, and hold onto the remote possibility, that I will live to see the day, that the people responsible for torturing me, can be shot into a fucking ditch.
Meanwhile, I take pills, not daily doses of some neurochemical roulette cocktail, but benzos when I am in a state of panic. I have some sticky letters that I got at a little craft store, spelling out "I am Here, It is Now" on the back of my guitar so I don't dissociate on stage. I have animals. I write songs. I watch youtube videos and read and talk to like-minded people. It's all maintenance though, not even approaching healing in an meaningful sense. I am probably the exception, not the rule, but nonetheless, meaningful healing, for me, does not appear to be on the menu.
Thanks for all you do.
Solitary confinement is one of the worst things you can do to a human being. You're absolutely right when you say you're pretty sure you're not supposed to adjust to that.
I suppose you're right, I've had an awful lot done to me, but only one thing still gets me broken down like this. One way or another, it's gonna be answered for, I don't care if I die. At some point, the offer of reform has to expire.
I had a quite bad reaction to taking drugs recently, and I was really distraught, upset and couldn't sleep for the whole night, but I decided that I'd use that pain to try and figure out what I need to do in my life- as someone who's never had much experience with romantic partners in the past, and spends nearly all my time in my room not socializing, I realized that I wasn't satisfied with living like that anymore, that things needed to change. I managed to gather the courage to let my girlfriend know how I really felt towards her, and started to see the importance in going out and socializing. I still don't go out too often, but my perception has changed, I'm no longer uncomfortable or upset about going out to meet people.
A good strategy for dealing with trauma is- rather than to disassociate, or to block out the pain, try to find a use for that pain, try to find a way of using it to improve your life, or to help others. If something happened that was out of your control, it could motivate you to go out and raise awareness about whatever it is that happened, to convince people to be safer doing that thing so that they can avoid that happening to them.
I’m supposed to be working but hey, LSR uploaded!
As a person dealing with multiple traumas, thank you for your openness and your insight.
I fell away from you after you drifted away from your initial rants, but as a budding anarchist, I am back and have really fallen in love with your channel and your morals.
I grew up in the middle of the crack epidemic in NYC, was stabbed, slashed while incarcerated, shot once and shot at on multiple occasions with 2 that I ended up takin a ricochet and fought, was jumped and just saw incredible violence and inhumanity from the day I was born til the day I was released from prison for the last time a few years back and the biggest issue I had all along was even acknowledging or admitting that I had even experienced any trauma. It was always played off as not that big a deal or just a part of life. But the reality of the situation was that I was more fucked up than I could handle on my own. Over the years I became badly addicted to opiates and later booze on top of it but used just about anything that would remove me from reality. Once I finally got in tune with myself and realized I needed to get professional help was the time I was able to really become whole for the 1st time. It's still a daily struggle. And there's still a lot of shit that trigger bad reactions of panic and anxiety or dope cravings. I still can't do large crowds and can't deal with people walking up behind me or sitting somewhere that I can't see the room or whatever. But it's a little better every day. This is a solid list. Keep it up, fam! ✊
Thanks, Cam. Your videos are great, and I've found them really helpful though I don't comment often (actually i'm not sure if i've commented at all before, i can't remember rn.) Glad you're feeling better about what you've been through and appreciate your thoughts and tips!
Dealing personally with my mental health over the years has meant coming to terms with the fact that the causes of my suffering weren't something to dismiss or trivialise. If you hold that logic, you extend that opinion to yourself as a whole very quickly.
Thank you for taking the time to make this video. I’m trying therapy again, albeit over a decade later, and trying to figure out how I can “reactivate” a lot of aspects about myself that shutdown a very long time ago. I’m hoping to find success this time around, as I’ve lived like this for a little over twenty years now.
Happy for you that you're healing. I have CPTSD and these principles are spot on.
Thanks as always, glad to see you back making thoughtful content like this-hope you’re doing well
thank you for this video
I was in a relationship. It did not work out she got hurt badly hurt mentally and physically. Then because she got hurt mentally and physically got hurt me mentally and physically. It was a long distance relationship we were going to get married. I read the psychologist RD Lang when I was young. He discussed something called “the double bind.” You go left or go right, they’re both bad choices. It’s like having to choose between which child has to live or die. It was highly stressful. I’m trying to do art photography. I’m a photographer. Thanks for the advice. You’re a bright young man.I’m also on the left politically and economically. Take care.
Thank you. I really needed to hear this right now...I'm going through some stuff...
Thank you so much for sharing. The more people open up about trauma, the less we all feel so alone. I still have to remind myself that it’s okay to get close to other people, since I expect irrationally that they will take vulnerability as an excuse to physically hurt me. I’m with you.
There is always so much benefit to be found in your videos, but this bare honesty is extremely humbling and to see you taking your experience as an opportunity to mentor others is imo the most admirable way to handle stress in the end. Recently had a rough few years wasted trying my hand at various SSRIs, very heartfelt solidarity with you brother and it’s inspiring to see you kicking ass about it.
Very courageous, Mate! Never stop uploading your great insights... I really appreciate this ... Greetings from a senior Amsterdam-based anarchist!
You deserve all the best, dude.
3:02 I legitimately thought you said "CRIME does a lot of good and hugs as well ...." it was only on the second to third listen that I realized it was CRYING not CRIME...
more importantly nice to see you're doing okay and hope you continue to.
(even if I'm 2 years behind on watching this)
(side note crying and hugs as an autistic individual who deals with (yes deals with not suffers from) sensory processing hugs are my best friends also being a genetic female my anatomy goes straight to crying with very little to no anger so I relate to the cry a lot as well)
Wonderful video, like always. This one helped me out in finding ways to process and aid in coping with my own traumatic experiences, so thank you.
I don't feel up to watching this right now but I'll try to remember to come back when I can. Thanks for the video!
Good video
I am glad you made this video and that you are feeling better. I do want to say that my one criticism of this video is ignoring the option of how getting prescribed medication could help someone dealing with depression, anxiety or PTSD. I'd like to tell you more about that, I have been meaning to contact you about collaborating to promote some of our shared ideas, I can explain details, thinking along the lines of infographics. I also made what I think is a more visually pleasing Anarcho-syndicalism flag that I want to take a look at. Please message me or email me.
Thank you for uploading this, I really needed it.
Personally if you d like to do it too,I want a video with your arguments against individualist-''Stirner''-anarchism,post left anarchism etc.I dont know it would be fun and educational too.
This was a powerful video. Thanks for sharing your experience and wisdom.
Your words are very wise and help a lot! thankyou
Thank you for sharing
Yes. Really good
Thank you
Thank you for this video. It's helpful for childhood sexual assault victims of which I am one.
Love your voice and accent.
It might help if you taped the script to something so that it would be next to the camera.
Awww. Hugs.
X x
My traumatic experiences were domestic abuse by my father and bullying at school. I was bullied entirely by male classmates in often times physical ways. While sometimes they were legitimate jokes I couldn't help but assosiate them with the domestic abuse as their over-all behaviour to others in our class, sense of humor and choice of vocabulary mirrored my father's quite closely. The kids (though this was still happening when we were adults in late high school) who weren't active bullies did nothing to stop it from happening (to anyone, not just me) either with the excuse of "boys will be boys" or with the idea that if they don't give them an audience, the bullies will stop. My mom's advice was to ignore their mean comments and they'll just get bored which, big shock, didn't work. When my dad saw me crying once after I was bullied, in the same breath as telling me that real men don't cry he suggested that I just beat them up - I was one of the shortest kids in class back then, but was also the heaviest, which lead to me getting fatshamed a lot, dad thought I should use my weight to my advantage to make them stop with violence.
It's gotten to the point where I either carefully observe the people around me to look for some indication that they are trustworthy or just put my headphones on and ignore the whole world. Father has also managed to pass on at least some of his violent tendencies to me, I don't want to have kids while I still have that aggression, because not only would I risk hurting them, but teaching them to hurt others in turn and continue this vicious cycle. The wheel stops with me one way or another. I've been around mostly people who have these toxic beliefs and behaviours and I have never had the option to not engage with them because it's either that or perpetual loneliness and depressive episodes. I've picked up their bad habits and I still talk and behave like these toxic people so it's been very difficult for me to make friends with those whom I want to engage with and would trust with seeing my vulnerability. In fact, that sort of toxic behaviour has just recently driven away a woman I wanted to ask out. Right now what I believe is at odds with how I behave around other people - I'm a self-aware hypocrite.
I know I should and I want to clean up my act but its been a challenge as my network of friends is small and hard to access.
Just from reading your comment you seem like a really intelligent and responsible person. What I will say is that you shouldn't necessarily assume that having kids will mean that you will treat them in the way that you were treated. That's a common idea but it might be the case that having had the experience you had, you certainly wouldn't wish that on anyone else.
It sounds like you have a lot of anger and frustration and you might find you benefit from channeling that anger into something constructive. Your dad sounds like a dickhead if he's telling you that 'real men don't cry'. Being bullied is a good reason to cry.
Thanks man. I know that it doesn't necessarily mean that I will mistreat any kids I may have. I wanted to say that I needed to be sure that I definitely won't do it before I have children. Having kids seems like a really far off idea anyway - I'll be 22 in January and I'm still a virgin and have never had a girlfriend. It just makes me even more uncomfortable around women whom I don't know whether they'll judge me for it and it makes me do this silly macho posturing around men, since they are far more likely to judge me for it.
Honestly, virginity is a silly idea constructed by a patriarchal society. It means shit all. It's what's inside that counts. I'm 23 myself.
Yeah, it's a concept that's been beaten into my head from before I really knew that my penis was meant for more than just making going number 1 easier (it had always struck me as strange back then that girls had to do it in such an impractical manner). I'm trying not to make a big deal of it. What's actually bugging me about it now is that I just want to experience sex as I've heard a lot of good things about it.
Are you going to put up some of your compositions again? I really enjoyed them in the past.
I have a soundcloud which you can check out here:
soundcloud.com/user-993657196
Would be interested to hear people's thoughts on the practice of sectioning and non-authoritarian ways serious mental health crises could be dealt with in an anarchist society. Of course the use of force is not alien to anarchist societies when necessary to protect, but could sectioning be comparable to policing, where an alternative organisation method (ie with policing, militia) could be found that avoids the systemic issues associated with it?
I got a lot from this ✅
First! For the first time ever I'm first! It means nothing I know!
Savour the moment my friend
@@ElectricUnicycleCrew I will!
This is truly, a momentous event.
You were 1st? That's fantastic, mate! :D
I just read the notes and realised that I'm not entirely happy with my last comment. I'm tired though. I will return.
I have been disassociated for 5 years now. Im too scared to see a therapist, plus it would be a lot of money that i dont want to burden my parents with paying. Does anyone have any advice on what i should do? I know looking for advice in the youtube comment section isnt the greatest idea, but I'm so desperate at this point and this video inspired me.
Check out 'the mindful way through depression' audiobook by Mark Williams. I found it really insightful and beneficial to use the meditative practices.
@@ElectricUnicycleCrew thank you so much!
You should look into the possibility for you to get free care of a psychiatrist or psychologist or therapist. I don't know your situation but you might qualify for Medicaid for example. Don't overlook the possibility that medication could help, if so then you need to see a psychiatrist which is one who can prescribe medicine. A psychologist can't prescribe medicine and so may not be considering that as an option as much as they should consider it.
I'm guessing Lib-Soc's recommended book is about mindfulness, but one specific part of it that helped me was fully focusing on physical sensations, what I can hear, smell, and feel. It works as a sort of grounding to bring you back to what's happening in the moment, not what's going on in your head.
Love youu
Thank you for sharing. In the midst of all the political madness around, its especially important to care for ourselves. I struggle with principle 6 and 7 myself. How do you define trauma?
That's a really difficult question because there are so many factors involved. For me for example I was in fight-or-flight when I had the difficult LSD trip, but I wasn't being mistreated by anyone at the time, I just had a freak out. But when I was sectioned I felt like that was mistreatment because I needed care and someone to talk to and hierarchical society is ill-equipped to provide those things. There I felt really powerless.
I also feel like the duration of the experience is important. The difficult parts of the LSD trip lasted for a few hours, but it was okay. Sectioning was different because there was an intensification of feelings which built up until I formed the attachment, which temporarily brought about feelings of safety and security. Once I had the attachment my brain just went wild trying to contextualise and understand it, and my mind was kept busy for several months. So there are very different experiences.
Wow. Timing
What does "sectioned" mean?
Good advice. CPTSD, its a lot about time and boundaries. Is it happening now, are these separate people etc. I had ptsd induced psychosis too and its probably not as rare as psychiatrists may describe (may say, oh it must be a psychotic predisposition etc. But aside from a higher schizotypy (i. E. Creative person) it is the description of mental breakdown that stems from neurotic not underlying psychotic traits. 'complex' ptsd is relatively new diagnosis that describes long term circumstancial trauma that isnt a single major event such as witnessing death. Its features are closer to depression, anxiety disorder, dissociative disorder, ocd or personality disorder
It would be interesting to hear a socialist stance too. Does capitalism make it tabboo to experience the grief and depression needed to work trauma out? I mean, its simply 'unproductive' to take a healthy break to go through it.
Deja vu
Were you dealing with derealisation/depersonalisation? Where Maybe you felt like you weren't you? Or maybe you were questioning what was "reality"?
I was experiencing those symptoms at the time as a result of the dissociation, but someone else happened to be there and I quite rapidly formed an attachment to that person as a coping strategy. I spoke to them in a way that said, "I can't deal with this." They responded and I felt cared for. That was more or less it. I'm not experiencing those things now and the psychotic episode was really just a misreading of the situation whereby I struggled to accept the basic reality of what my life is like, a key part of which is that forming emotional bonds with other people is something I find really difficult. It was hard for me to see that the attachment was just a self-preservation strategy and not a real bond based on shared experience.
Stick to cannabis edibles... Much safer. Just close your eyes and listen to Prodigy - Climbatize (or something similar) and you'll have amazing psychedelic experience. 🍄
LSD is safe. You just need to have the right set and setting. I'm not against cannabis though.
@@ElectricUnicycleCrew I agree, and PTSD/Trauma is helped by cannabis too ua-cam.com/video/psg5GDUBhLs/v-deo.html
Both can be dissasiciative in high doses TBF which can be therapeutic or damaging sometimes. It's good to be able to easily step out of your current worldview by totally dissolving it and reinforce/add foundations to your existing one or to review it in from a different PoV.
For me the benefits of using milder psychoactives like edibles are having steadier mental models to come back to, while having more freedom to explore others.
Thanks for all the great vids BTW!
Well, depending on some variables and conditions (for example dealing with a stressful situation at the time), eating pot could also result in a psychotic break. See: "Nobody would question that marijuana can make some people temporarily experience psychotic symptoms, says Dr. Nora Volkow, the director of the National Institute for Drug Abuse at the National Institutes for Health. " www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/06/390143641/pot-can-trigger-psychotic-symptoms-for-some-but-do-the-effects-last
I know, that's why I suggested it. Trippy but safer.
Ok
do you have any advice for someone who hasn't tried LSD yet? i have a friend who wants me to try it at a EDM show someday, maybe even Infected Mushroom which is Progressive PsyTrance. anyways, i like your videos, thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience ~hugs~
The first time I tried LSD was one of the two best days of my life. I took it with a trip sitter and I had done a great deal of planning and forethought about the kinds of personal questions I wanted to ask myself. I think you will get more out of it if you take it in a private setting with someone you trust, even better if it's someone with experience who understands how tripping works, make sure your environment isn't too messy and you've got things to stare at. Grainy textures are good. If I were you I wouldn't make your first time at an EDM show because LSD is not a party drug, at least in my experience. Plus you'd have very loud noise to contend with and you might not be the sort of person that enjoys that. But I don't know you and it is up to you how you want your first time to be. Personally I'd be really careful and think it through.
@@ElectricUnicycleCrew thank you, and these are fair points, i actually had a feeling that maybe a concert might be a bad idea for a first time, especially since i'm not the most emotionally stable, i have esteem issues, so maybe a safe environment would be better.
if you don't mind a follow-up question, have you ever tried marijuana in any form? flowers? wax? edibles? etc? if so, do you enjoy seeing shows when high on weed or anything else?
Hello there! I haven’t yet watched the video but I would like to inform you about earthstrike! A movement to save the planet! Go check out the reddit page and website if yoh have time!
Thanks!
(Btw I love your channel)
Do you think libertarian socialists can still support the existence of a state?
Hey have you heard of Jordan Peterson?
How old where you when you took LSD? I'm guessing really young as you look young now and you said it was a while ago?
I should say, I've taken it multiple times and had both positive and negative experiences with it. Hence why I prefer to say 'difficult' rather than bad. The best day of my life was on LSD, hands down.
I see you’ve become a self help channel. Time to drop politics lol
Politics and trauma are related topics my friend
Libertarian Socialist Rants they are the same topic, along with philosophy, economics and psychology. I was only able to see the connections from Richard Wolff and the psychologist Harriet Fraad you can see other charlatans and demagogues like Jordan Peterson making this important connection although a right wing perspective on it. Intelligence is being able to see the connections of everything to everything and staying sane is being able to communicate the connections effectively to other individuals.
this video is important
thank you
very helpful. thank you