Setting Boundaries for Yourself and Others
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- Опубліковано 23 лют 2021
- We often receive the behavior we are willing to tolerate, but what does that mean for our daily interactions?
Communication is the clearest way to let someone know how you are feeling. When meeting with someone who you feel is being rude, we may try to give outward signs of our discomfort, but we can’t guarantee they’ll understand unless we tell them directly. And obviously, this isn’t easy.
There aren’t many people who love confrontation, and even some that do anything they can to avoid it. We’re always so afraid that if we bring up something that we want changed, or share something that’s hurting us, that we’ll destroy that relationship. But more times than not, confronting these things head on and setting these boundaries won’t hurt the relationship but will strengthen it.
This isn’t just relevant for our relationships with other people either - it’s relevant to our relationship with ourselves. How many times have we made personal goals or aspirations but never changed our behaviors to make them possible? We get the behaviors that we’re willing to tolerate, even within ourselves.
St. Ignatius of Loyala had an exercise where he would imagine two sides, the side of the evil one and the side of the Lord. In this exercise, he would look at his decisions and choices for his life and decide, based on which side they fell on, who he would ultimately join: the evil one, or the Lord. By birth we belong to the evil one, but by baptism we belong to the Lord. Each side is battling for us to come over to their side, and if we are striving to be on the Lord’s side, then we have to recognize boundaries for ourselves that we can’t tolerate.
This battle does not need to be fought alone-in fact, it can’t be. We must rely on the infinite grace of God, which he is longing to give us every second of our day. What are the behaviors we need to remove from our lives for the glory of God?
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I find myself tolerating bad behaviour and....then getting angry with the person...and then getting angry at myself. Round and round we go.
You're not alone... The only thing at that time i am developing nowadays whenever I couldn't tolerate someone is I silently say "Lord Jesus please help me how to react now" for at least 10 times...
Try it, well this might work for you...
It takes a certain kind of finesse and practice to set healthy boundaries. I write down my response and say it out loud a few time before telling the person.
I find myself constantly being ordered around by people who call what they're doing "setting boundaries" but like, the only way to please them is to leave.
We’re we separated at birth? I’m exactly the same way!
@@ItsViolaRose what are those boundaries they set? Was it ethically good for you? just asking
If you try to set boundaries and enforce them with folks, you will find out rather quickly who will no longer want anything in any way to do with you, just be prepared for that outcome, doesn't mean it's wrong to set boundaries but be ready 👍👍
I told a guy I'm not going to tolerate his lateness anymore.
Reinforced my boundary by refuse to meet him if he is not on time.
Haven't meet him in a long time.
I have a family member who would grossly takes advantage of me, take credit for what I do and also I recently found out spreads lies about me as if I do the things to her that she actually does to me... I keep feeling like "family is everything" but what you've said has definitely been happening when I tried to set boundaries and it seems my home life has become infinitely worse... it's like I now have to fight for her or something. what would you do in that instance?
So very true. Well said.
Well that’s just silly. Okay so take the abuse?
You know, the timeliness of Father’s videos is actually insane sometimes. They always seem to freakishly line up with exactly what I need to hear at the moment...Definitely doing God’s will!!!
As the saying goes, it is not coincidence, it's Providence. 🙏
Holy Spirit is abundantly around us!
@Rejoicing In Hope you don't have a dad or had one? What do you call him? Sir? Or by his name? 🤔
Rejoicing In Hope See 1Cor 4:15 where St Paul calls himself father. Follow the teachings of the Catholic Church upon which Christ founded and you will be not led astray.
What do mean by insane? He’s one of the most sane dudes I’ve ever heard. I must say he is phenomenal it’s one of the reasons why I’m involved in the Church.
At 60, I'm finally learning to put up healthy boundaries. I'm not willing to be stepped on anymore & this includes family. It's difficult because I always want to help others. Unfortunately, my niceness is being equated with weakness.
Yep there’s a difference between being good and nice
Thank you for this Mr Robert! I'm learning this now! Its difficult because it's someone in the family!Need to set my boundaries! :D
@@kelvinroy2782 you're welcome. It's difficult because I tend to be a people pleaser but I'm definitely sticking to my guns.
"60" is the New 30!
When we were '30', that was the time we Should have put up Healthy boundaries and we Might have changed our lives, for the better.
I'm turning 60, in a couple of months too and have realised my many past blunders! God Bless.
@@Cube_Ernator1077 thank you for sharing. I totally agree. Unfortunately, it took years of experience & just being tired, to put a stop to the insanity.
Many Christians seem to believe it’s forbidden to set boundaries with abusers. Thank you for at least hinting that isn’t the case, and that people should be held to a standard.
Wow. I’d never heard that - ever!
@@Donna-cc1kt It’s seldom stated that plainly. It’s the attitude that that one dare not end relationships nor condemn abuse-that forgiveness means denial. That’s very common.
Christians think it's forbidden to set boundaries with abusers? Interesting! never heard that before.
True...it's important to stop enabling toxic behaviour...if we keep enabling it the person doesn't grow and ends up being their worst version
Yes I was always confused about this bc I was told to forgive since being a child
Thank you Father Mike for everything you do.
Amen
@izaak siqueiros 2021 Christian channel why is that?
Enlightening. Thank you father mike
@Rejoicing In Hope What name do you sometimes use for your dad or to refer to your dad (or someone else’s dad)?
I agree. It depends on how much you are willing to put up with.
“You will never change what you tolerate”
Amen
This is an eye-opener. It takes courage to set boundaries! I found myself tolerating rude behaviors, thinking that I wanted to be nice and inclusive. This only generated resentment in my heart. I finally found the courage and started to, little by little, set some boundaries. People said I changed. I am trying to speak up for myself.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,
Scam report this
50 + years, and I am finally applying this technique to my life, it feels so wonderful . . .
@@bishopdavidoyedepo5490 Nice try ‘Bishop’!
I truly have to agree with you on this one Father Mike. As Eleanor Roosevelt once said : “ no one makes a fool out of you without your welcome cooperation.“
Ah! How painfully true this is. A few years ago, I allowed a man (a Catholic man, wonderful in many ways) ghost me, and then come back. I shouldn’t have allowed this first time. We went around the mulberry bush a few more times with the same pattern of behaviour- ghosting and me allowing him back. Each time we were back on, I was filled with anxiety about when he would just one day decide to disappear. Each time, I was more and more careful with my behaviour, less and less free, just to avoid a ghosting. It didn’t change the inevitable - he ended up ghosting me once and for all (well, it’s almost 3 years, so it’s been the longest stretch)... point is, when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
What is ghosting?
Yes like when your spouse has 2 affairs
@@lilyofthevalley4740 like when a person disappears on you
@@lmlmlmlm7627 Thanks. Thought so but just clarifying.
@@Ingrid0410 oohh....that is worse 😥
My narcissistic parent treats me with constant disrespect.
I’m very low contact at the moment & it’s a very freeing feeling.
Hope he/she turns around and seeks forgiveness, praying for you Emma
I've heard of setting boundaries with others, but it was eye opening to turn that back on myself. I tolerate so much negative behavior from others and from myself.
That is really good and helpful insight. Thank you!
Agree. Totally opened my eyed.
People will consistently treat you the way you see yourself
Although this is from a Protestant perspective, the book “ no more Christian nice guy” helped me a lot. There’s one for women too called “ no more Christian nice girl”. Being good instead of nice takes courage.
The challenge arises when dealing with narcissistic personalities; individuals who wield their power and influence as a means to avoid making compromises or recognizing the boundaries of others An authority figure, such as a parent or a boss comes to mind.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
I learned this when I was turning 50 & my life changed
As a non catholic Father Mike is the best a making me sit back and think about things. I thank God for Fr. Mike. He has helped me more than anyone. 🙏🏻❤️
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
God bless you. Which church?
My daughter just said to me your boundaries are too fluid, you get upset with people too often who push you. You need stronger boundaries whether about behavior or speech. I think seeing this was a gift. : )
Boundaries end up being healthier for everyone involved
I’m mildly autistic, so boundaries have always been a sore point, both in terms of me perceiving others' (especially as a woman, where people expect me to be strong in this area,) and in terms of being totally unable to set boundaries without being a jerk 😕
Same for me.
Idk if I'm autistic or not for sure, but I usually just avoid those people and situations without saying why instead of saying whats bothering me. (I'm a man by the way) I guess that can be pretty rude and confusing now that I think about it.
Thanks to people that don't love me ..I learned to forgive. I learn to love my enemy. And because of love I put boundaries and pray for them 🙏 Everything you do do it For Love♥️
Watching his videos always makes me rethink, smile, a strive to be a better person not just for me but for God as well.
Father Mike, your videos touch my soul!! I feel like you’re my friend, you have a perfect balance of humor and seriousness! Yesterday I saw a man running in my neighborhood and he had his phones speaker turned up... When I heard it I was like hey... I know that voice.. it was you Father Mike and your Bible in a year podcast he was listening to as he ran! I’m blown away at how many people you have touched. Thanks for making this Lent a special time of reflection.
Wonderful story.
I have been way too tolerant in my life ... I put up with so many things that stepped over my boundaries and didn’t say anything for fear of losing that relationship . I wish I learned about setting boundaries in my 20’s ... I might be someone different now but we are not supposed to look back. I think we need a relationship etiquette book since the advent of cell phones. It’s hard to resist them.
This is so important. Literally my entire week has revolved around setting clear boundaries and the importance of it! It’s crazy how it has been my main topic of conversation these days and here father Mike posts this video 🤣
Holy Spirit moments 😁. My landlord is about my age and sometimes speaks to me as if I were a child. I plan to respectfully set this boundary. Thanks be to Holy Spirit and thanks be to Fr. Mike. God bless.
Fr Mike I’m a 70 yr old, how I wish I learned this many moons ago, but thank u for this invaluable lesson.
So true! Picking up grandson at preschool today, we wait in line outside, a twenty something mom allowed her 6 year old to pummel her and she just let him. He wanted her attention and she kept talking ignoring him. I had to turn away. Needless to say my grandchildren do not hit me, not after the first time.
I agree with not tolerating bad behaviour..
Perhaps we should be less fragile and more resilient too...
Happens in my family.
And instead of discussing drawing a boundary the person just automatically draws a boundary by ignoring or distancing. That is not ok. Talking honestly about it makes more sense! Yes?
Maybe the person just ignores because sometimes the other person is not ready to accept their behavior is hurtful. And they ignore to avoid a hostile response. Sometimes removing yourself can save a hostile situation.
You don't always have to discuss boundaries although I think that it's good to talk if the person is a family member or a close friend.
That’s called manipulation. Some people feel boundaries are attacks sadly. Happens in my family too. I put up a boundary and am the bad guy. Idc. I need to protect myself.
@@Whitewavewoman I think the issue for me is if you have previously set the boundary but the person continues to cross it. I guess that is what I mean by they are not ready or willing to change the behavior that is causing the rift. My wish is always for mutual love and respect.
As long as the person who is setting the boundaries does it respectfully and calmly. I had a friend scold me big time when she didn’t appreciate my opinion. So then I started keeping my opinions and thoughts to myself, thinking that is what she wants. After many months had gone by, she then tells me that she is interested in my thoughts and opinions. So now, I try to avoid saying anything that I think is going to make her mad. It may not seem like it after reading this but other than that she is a good person and a good friend. I have just accepted this is just how our friendship is. I am fortunate to have several good friends that welcome my thoughts and opinions. So again, if you’re the one that is going to set the boundaries, do it calmly and respectfully.
More than ever today we are in spiritual warfare! Share this with everyone! God Bless!
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
Father Mike: Thank you and God bless you, for all that you do for our youtube community of worshipers. You are sincerely, appreciated.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
This is very true. I have started standing up in a more constructive way ... It's a lot more work than I am used to ... But it is better. Thank uou
@izaak siqueiros 2021 Christian channel Literally nothing to do with the comment
How does one deal with adult children and grandchildren who should know what is right and wrong and do what they want anyway - I am talking prostitution to earn money, bisexual activity and promiscuity, drug addiction, no formal school since junior high ( Grade 7 ) - so many issues I can’t begin to name them all?
They have all been brought in the Church, but only one out of 5 claims to be Catholic.
Do you simply tolerate everything and do what you can?
Without our help, 2 would be on the streets.
I know you are discussing smaller matters, but I never know if what my husband and I tolerate can be changed. We are talking years of behaviour - with promises to change.
Or do we continue to pray for them and be there for them? My daughter thinks prostitution is a valid occupation. My granddaughter claims bisexuality and lives accordingly.
They both ( no surprise ) say they are “ spiritual “ but not religious. This has been discussed with priests and with them, so prayer is my hope. And not to cut them out of our lives.
Pj Smith, never give up hope and continue praying. Try your best to discern what God wills you to do in each family members situation. Don't act unless the way is clear and clearly from God. Pray and trust that God hears every one of your prayers (throughout all the many, many years) and is answering all of your prayers in the most loving and best way for each family member. Wait on the Lord and trust Him completely concerning your family. Be at peace. All is well. Remember, with God, nothing is impossible. Remain in God's peace. Trust God. This is what I have learned in my experience, I hope it helps.
This talk was genuinely sent by God for me today. Thank you Father for this video it was exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for being a great teacher. God Bless
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,
Scam. Report this
The level of tolerance for each person varies according to different situations. For instance when I'm with family I am more intolerant with the little imperfections I see in the behaviour of my close ones because reconciling with family is easier. But when with the people I come across at work, I have no choice but to show more tolerance with them and so I behave accordingly. Even if some things that they do may not be proper or if it annoys me, I'll have to patiently bear with it because it is necessary to be in good relationships with them if you have to survive there and it will give a clearer vision about what your work looks like so that you can function more efficiently.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,,
Scam report this
@Anna Varghse: I'm so glad you said this, because I'm the exact same way (especially with my friends). I don't know if it's because we know our own families more and it's just easier to get more irritated, but I don't know if I'm just "people-pleasing" with my friends. But it's good to know that I'm not the only one like this.
I always let individuals talk down to me. It makes me feel stupid. I always thought if i saw say something i would the bad person. But now hearing Fr. Mike i can stand up for myself and not let people talk to me that way.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
Father this is rlly what I needed. I have been struggling so much with telling people to stop what they are doing. Thank you sm
I really needed to hear this. I just need to regroup my own thoughts and be able to clearly communicate what my boundaries are. I am used to being quiet and trying to be calm. But then things build up. Thank you father Mike, God knows how to communicate through his messengers so very well. May the Lord always Bless you father. Please pray for us all that are here. 🙏🏼
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you.
Thank you Fr Mike, It is truly changing our tolerance to wrongdoing by accepting our identity as Children of God and knowing that we always deserve respect, love and tolerance is the key to a well-being and a life healthy life journey.
God's love surpasses all calousness and casts away any wickedness that dwells within the ignorant.
Came for the thumbnail. Stayed for the message
Fr. Mike, I love your insights, your honest smiles, and especially your laughter. Thank you so much.
@Rejoicing In Hope My dearest brother in Christ. John said, “My little children, I am writing this to you so that you may not sin; but if any one does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous” (1 John 2:1); “No greater joy can I have than this, to hear that my children follow the truth” (3 John 4). John also addresses men in his congregations as “fathers” (1 John 2:13-14). God be with you always, for you are a beloved child of God.
I can totally relate to the “being late” comment. It’s reserved for a special few because they tolerate it! I loved this video :)
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
God Bless you and keep you! Just awesome Father and Priest! I’ve just ordered your Baptism dvd as I trust your great relatable teaching! You are the door , the bridge, the place to come back to church authentically!
Some great points made but you have to choose your battles and often bide your time. When we tolerate bad behaviour, we sometimes have to look at the greater good. It takes true wisdom to navigate around some people and sometimes turning a blind eye to an offense is the better course of action. Proverbs is full of wisdom about dealing with quick tempered fools. We have to always try to be wise, patient and discerning.
This priest is amazing! God bless him !
This is so true Fr Mike 🙏🏻 I needed this! Thank you! God bless you!
I feel like he always knows just what to say, and he says it so eloquently and clear! I love that! ❤
I needed to hear that about changing myself. There's plenty I can see that I don't want from other people. And I have set boundaries on myself because #1 God doesn't want me to be like that. #2. I don't want to be like that. I made those boundaries for myself. I needed this video to remind me. Thank you, Father Mike. I'm going to write the behaviors down that I want to change in myself. And check it often.
Thank you Father Mike. This is exactly what I needed to hear today.
Having this video pop up was such perfect timing! I am pretty good with making it clear to others what I will tolerate, but I am realizing that I am my own worst enemy when it comes to myself. Thank you Fr. Mike!
Thank you for your advice, father! May the Lord continue to bless you and your ministry
Thank you Fr. Mike.
When I tried to be nice, I tolerated rude behaviour of somebody. And it keeps happening again to me from one person in the group to another person. Now I do realise to set that boundary right from the start and also within myself too, or else I will never get out of that tolerance.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
Couldn’t be more truthful. People think that because I practice as a psychotherapist I am required to accept and approve of every opinion/be ok with being insulted or berated if I express personal views. Also yes, there are behaviors/thinking patterns within myself that I have tolerated for too long.
What a great message. One I don’t think I’ve taken time to ponder before. Thank you.
So true, so simple but so hard. "We get the behavior we tolerate". So important to learn boundaries and practice making boundaries early in life.
There are so many kinds of relationships in which this simple act of respect can save. The toxin in a toxic relationship - not the actual people being sociopathic
This is a great practice especially for community groups but also personal relationships like family, friends, pointed spousal issues - needed BADLY.
Thanks again, Fr. S.
How I wish I had known this as a new bride.....I could have saved myself some terrible grief....I'm 81, but it is still good to hear this. You are such a blessing to God's people. Thank you!
Father thank you so much. This is truth. I needed this and I know many others do too
Thank You Father Mike. God Bless You!
Yes Father 💯🙌 this can relate to timeliness, dating expectations, things at work, parenting... the list goes on and on. Don’t settle!
@Rejoicing In Hope this is such a misapplication of text taken out context. if you read farther along in St. Paul’s letters, you will see a variety of examples of Paul exercising a spiritual fatherhood over the different Christians, and tradition reveals to us that this has been practiced even back into that time.
The timing on this is amazing. Were talking with a friend about enforcing boundaries abiut abusive behaviors
Definitely needed this. Put a lot of things in perspective for me. God bless padre!
Love the video. I feel like anyone with family members that argue could set boundaries, especially when arguing with siblings; haha. I find myself tolerating a lot of behaviors that I should try to communicate. Even more important is trying to stop tolerating negative things that we do.
Watching this video helped me make a decision that I was indecisive about and that was in rewards to my job. Now I know what I have to do because I am not willing to tolerate this behavior anymore.
Totally agree Father Mike. Setting healthy boundaries, is important to my peace of mind.
God speaks to me so much through your videos Father! Thank you!!
A very wise Little Sister of the Poor saw an elderly resident being rude to me as a tried to help her. Sister pulled me aside and said, don't let her treat you like that. It's not good for your soul and it's not good for her soul.
This message is so important and have found it to be so true as well. I also like how Father Mike explained how to go about explaining the behaviour that one will not tolerate because a lot of the time it’s not what we say but how we say it. Thanks Father Mike
It's very difficult to set boundaries for yourself towards others who aren't willing to set boundaries for themselves. I find this, heartbreakingly true in my relationship with my mother. Please pray for me and more especially her so I can develop a healthier and more consistently respectful way of speaking with her.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,
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I'd love to see one on over-setting boundaries as well. Often, when people receive the message "you need to set boundaries" they occasionally over-reach in a way that ends relationships for them. If someone is constantly nit-picking your every behavior (turn down the TV, stop chewing gum, don't do your laundry when I'm home, stop making me food I don't like, don't wear clothes I don't like, etc etc) you end up just leaving because there's no pleasing them without basically disappearing.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,
Scam. Dont respond. Report him
This doesn’t sound like boundaries, but like controlling behavior. Boundaries focus on what I need and what I will tolerate, and controlling focuses on the other person and needing to change their behavior. It also doesn’t allow a person to be a person- giving them grace, so to speak.
@@kategenn8944 they call it "setting boundaries". Focusing on what you won't tolerate from others means either telling them (setting expectations) or not telling them and leaving without telling them why. There are always at least two people in a boundary setting situation and we can't really use semantics to forget that.
My friend Annette and I are really enjoying the Bible in a Year podcast. Thank you Fr. Mike! Your UA-cam videos are also an enriching addition to our lives.
Thank you father Mike I really needed to hear this today. I immensely appreciate all of your videos.
So true and important to have courage, tools to hold yourself accountable and perseverance to try, try, try again.
When I stand up for myself it always backfires. That is why I am alone .
With some people, when I set boundaries I get scolded or have assumptions made about me. Just for a simple boundary.
This happened with one of my bosses...I'm ADHD and have HUGE issues with time management. I've had jobs were managers tell me to be on time. I try but still struggle. Over time they just wouldn't say anything. They would mention the work I do is more valuable. Then came the boss that changed my perspective. She told me that no matter how hard I worked if I was not on time it degrades all the work I do and she finds it extremely hurtful. But it gets better she actually took the time to listen to my struggles without judgment. I told her it's been a bad habit for years and after a while I just stopped trying because it felt like there was no point. She did not fire me and actually worked with me. Meaning I would try every day to get there a little earlier than the day before. She even taught me how to prioritize tasks. I really saw God's love, mercy, and discipline through her and I'm so grateful to have met her! ❤
This one hit me hard. I have trouble setting boundaries and when I finally do, the two closest people in my life do not respect them anyway and I have a hard time with the confrontation that always comes about afterwards. I just never thought of it as receiving the behavior I am willing to tolerate, but that is the truth. Just writing this out makes me realize how weak I am. I have a lot to think about and pray about.
You see it everywhere if you pay attention. Someone complains about another’s behavior, but they never set up the boundary to tell them that it wasn’t acceptable. Then you get the extremist who will blow everything out of proportion and cause you to change, it leaves the person feeling desolate when an extreme view of the situation takes center stage.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you.
Great advice to make a positive impact in others as well as ourselves while still being kind and living our Catholic values.
So true,an answer I've been searching for.Thankyou so much Father Mike
Looks like I have swung for awhile from one extreme to another while doing my best to be maintaining healthy boundaries. Now that I am aware of that too I will have no more excuses. For example, I do not tolerate any dates who expect me to act for them like I have no children while they are acting jealous of 1 or more of them while being in my life the rest of the time. Thanks for the encouragement to go on from that while serving the Lord.
Thank you father Mike 🙏😇
Sadly if you are dealing with abusers, you can set firm and clear boundaries but they completely disregard them and keep abusing you. You try to get away and go 'no contact' but they stalk you with texts, calls, emails, and showing up on your doorstep. It is such a powerless feeling.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,
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Thankyou Father Mike. Blessings to you and all💞🙏
Amen. Thank you so much Fr. Mike.
I set the rules for my daughter and she still lies. I cut off her money at college. Rules were explained and she opted to dishonor her parents. Will not tolerate disrespect:
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,,
where is this coming from??!! This is wrong
Fr. Mike, this is unbelievably timely for me, thank you.
Excellent topic. Just being 100% honest. Thank you.
Thank you! This post is exactly what I needed to hear!
@izaak siqueiros 2021 Christian channel CATHOLICS WORSHIP 7 DAYS A WEEK. WE HAVE SERVICES EVERYTDAY AND NOT JUST YOUR ONE. MASS IS SAID EVERYWHERE 7 DAYS A WEEK.
Thank you so much Father Mike. The way you put all these topics you talk about into simple and understandable words is simply amazing. Every video I watched from you so far gives me a boost to be myself and to be better. And I must admit I am not a Christian. But your message is universal. Keep doing what you are doing. We need more people like you!
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
Thank you father Mike! This is all I need to hear and be reminded! It's not only the courage to set boundaries around us but also in ourselves as well!
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,
Scam report this
Thinking of a friend who is striving to be a better person. I pray Mama Mary will give him the strength to follow your advice here, Fr. Mike. God bless.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,,,
Scam report this
I remember explaining this to someone and them saying I have a friend that might need this same advise. When I told the other friend she cried. The truth hurts when we live lies.
You will get what you tolerate! So simple and yet so not obvious for me! Thankyou father Mike, i really needed to hear this! My entire life i've never been able to set bounderies, even my kids walk all over me. Sounds cheesy but this statement is life changing for me.
I will not get what i do not tolerate anymore, i will set bounderies and follow through with the consequences, this is empowering, i will do good, and do good to myself aswell.
Thank you so much for sharing this video father. This is what I exactly needed to hear today. God has blessed you so much with the understanding of His love and to be able to share it with others. Thank you for all that you do.
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you,,
Scam report this
This is what I needed. Absolutely what I needed to hear, Praise our Heavenly Father for watching over us and answering our prayers & questions! Thank you Fr. Mike😊
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you
Oh my gosh. I just went through this with my younger sister, but I didn’t explain my boundaries very well bc I’ve taken her intrusions for so many years. I finally hit my limit and snapped at her. Then I realized I’d had never explained my boundaries so she’d know where to not go with me. I now have, she didn’t take it very well, so we’ll see how it goes in the future, but it was a very necessary step in our relationship even though it’s hard to do.
Thank you for teaching me about me🤓Thank you for your Preisthood Father Mike, May God continue to bless you and our Lady protect you.
Thank you Fr. Mike , a thought provoking presentation. I enjoy all your talks or conversations with others e.g. Matt Fradd.
I found setting boundaries for yourself and others enlightening but in my experience I think it comes with a warning. I am not perfect but try to be patient,loving forgiving etc. One friend is constantly setting boundaries. This , may I say, narcissistic approach causes damage. It has become a dogmatic power tool with little respect for those she expects to tow her line! These are the people closest to her. So may I suggest a judicious and loving approach when setting boundaries . At present I am seriously in the doghouse and will happily remain so while I wait on the Lord. It may be that I speak loving truth or walk away.
So important! Adorable. "Would you please not do that?" and "We get the behavior that we are willing to tolerate..." Some lessons that I WISH I HAD LEARNED AS A CHILD.
Thank you Fr Mike. The Lord just spoke right in to my heart through you , something that I struggled for years with my self and closest people around me. Today I was in deep misery not knowing what to do this issue. It’s amazing how I found your clip today . God bless you .... all the way from Sri Lanka
Child of God as I was praying. God ministered to me in a revelation as I view your profile, to see things around you, I saw blessings but spiritual attacks holding onto them, in prayers, i saw a woman in the realm of the spirit monitoring and plotting delay in your life, with an evil mirror, with a motive to destroy. But as I speak to you now her time is up, for God immediate intervention in your life, Render a seed offering with Anything you can afford or give to the motherless, sow it to ( EGHOSA ORPHANAGE HOME ) in Edo state nigeria before 2DAYS with faith, as I Rise my hands towards heaven and pray for you they shall serve as point of contact wherever you are, you will receive double portion of grace to excel and total restoration of breakthrough in your life and in the life of your family. Ask for their acct details and help, call the MD in charge of the orphanage to get their details on
WhatsApp or call them now on
+2349046099547
Tell him I sent you. For it is not by might nor by power but of the spirit saith the lord (zechariah i4:6). You shall testify to the Glory of God in your life. God bless you.