Funny Disabilities | Tom Segura Stand Up Comedy | "Disgraceful" on Netflix
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- Опубліковано 4 чер 2024
- Tom Segura agrees the most disabilities are terrible and not funny… but some are. Ever heard of Foreign Accent Syndrome? Watch the full stand up comedy special “Disgraceful” on Netflix.
tomsegura.com/ - Комедії
As a disabled person, I approve this message. If you can't laugh at your issues, then you're defeated by them!
I’m a burn victim and my favorite line to use when someone brings it up is “I’m not burnt! I’m well done.”
@@BlitzkriegBryce cute
The same ...
@@BlitzkriegBryce right after my amputation, I posted on FB to ask if I could officially enter an ass kicking contest as a one legged man. Then after I had 2 toes amputated on my remaining foot, I told everyone that I can now only count to 13! (10 fingers and only 3 toes) 🤣😂
@@jasonsabbath6996 always been a fan of the “one legged man in an ass kicking contest” since I heard Jim Ross say it back in WWF. I know it’s constantly difficult and that these things do cause the occasional sad/angry mood swings but I’m happy to hear you’re keeping good spirits and not letting it make you a bitter, miserable person.
I'm convinced Tom as a child was like Cartmen from South Park
Just not as good at Basketball.
But cooler and less of a sociopath.
Was?
@@nodiggity9472 there’s an episode where cart man is good at basketball.....?
Yeah seriously it does seem that way
I worked with a kid who had touretts, when I worked at a fast food place back in highschool for three years. He started small with the little ticks and sometimes he would say fuk or shit. I never acknowledge them, at the time I didn't know what it was called exactly. But for three years I pretended that I didn't notice or hear them, I'd even continue talking to him as if nothing was happening. We got along quite well, then he heard I was leaving. I came in to pick up my last check, he was on the grill and made me my favorite mushroom burger and sat down with me. We talked for a while and he finally asked why I never said anything about his touretts. I told him I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable or different around me. He smiled and said because I never acknowledge them he was at ease and he never went full blast like he had at other places.
You’re an awesome guy
🔥🔥🔥🔥
I think he might have gotten the last laugh lol; because it’s a myth that people with Tourette’s Syndrome curse. It does happen occasionally but it’s suuuper rare.
@@ericray7173
Well you might be right, but him swearing doesn't mean it was brought on by the touretts, he could of just had a potty mouth and I just assumed it was from it. Then again thinking back working at a fast food place. Swearing on the occasion was not unheard of. Burn yourself on the grill or the deep fryer, get 10 orders right before closing, boss makes you stay 2 hours over your leaving time. Honestly wish I had kept in touch with him. He was real chill for the most part. But we didn't even go to the same highschool and then after college, who knows. I don't even have a Facebook, but I wish him well. If you're reading this Bryan from Beef o Roo, wish you well. ✌️
@@ericray7173 it’s called coprolalia. It’s not uncommon for someone with Tourette’s to have verbal tics of an obscene nature. And for many people it happens multiple times a day.
As someone who's best friend has Tourette's, that shit does not ever get old
Gets old quick when you’re the one that’s got it. :)
Trust me, if you had my tics for a day they would get old fast
@@crittertracker Very true
@@purplepickles34 0:15 what's quilt and 10k mean ?
@@-chenlanying5818 I don't know. Also, why are you asking me? 😂
“ do you know how hard it is to do that accent without squinting “… got me😂
“impression”
I died at that part too 🤣 🤣
I fucking scream laughed
@@canadiankiddownunder5376 I had mountain dew come out my nose
No she's white this is fine
"And she killed herself, she's dead, so." 😂
Seriously 😳
That got me good 🤣
"Shes out of teaching.... she fine so.."
People might accuse Tom of being callous making fun of Foreign Accent Syndrome but honestly the biggest problem these people face is lack of awareness, and everyone thinking they're faking.
He's legitimately doing a great service here.
Fair point. It is true that there's nothing actually impairing about Foreign Accent Syndrome whatsoever other than the social behaviors it creates in others. That makes it truly one of the most unique conditions in neuroscience.
Foreign accent syndrome is just Gods sense of humor.
In HS there was a dude who spoke in an Aussie accent. Everyone just assumed he was an Aussie until they met his family.
He also had a full beard in 7th grade so we were so fkn confused in general anyway we just chalked it up to being a strayan.
@@JarthenGreenmeadowit's true, our beards come in early here in straya. Maybe it's the humidity or the fact that we're always living upside down. Check out Fairbairn, I think they're called & upside down Australia.
"and she killed herself, she's dead"
*hysterical laughter*
I have tourettes, and I think it's hilarious...I fully believe that every exorcist movie is just someone with tourettes AND foreign accent syndrome 🤣🤣
Same here: UpsettyTouretty since kindergarten. Those were the days, also had some substitute teachers who couldn't handle me at first 😂
@@royroos8036 thankfully my tourettes was barely noticeable until I was 21...like I was undiagnosed...but now people randomly tell me bless you all day long bc they think I'm sneezing 🤣
I don’t know what’s better: your comment, or your username 😅😂🤣
Yesssss!!!
@@highmaintenanceredneck4810 oh its toned down a lot now I'm older. I also sometimes get the bless you thrown at me. I just say thank you 😅
Tom: "physical disabilities are funny"
Also Tom: *breaks arm and leg*
Never seen a comedian so dedicated to a joke before
Frfr and now that he right hooked jeans down the stairs for calling out when he is sneezing
LMFAO
Which was fucking hysterical... he's still right.
Bikes!
That's a disability?
You can just TELL Tom was holding in his Asian impression for like 30 years.
Skip skip skip skip
I’m disabled and can’t stop laughing at this. True as hell. Some disabilities are just funny. Great set.
I wish I could erase my memory to only rediscover Tom‘s standups..
Happened upon him on a Kreischer podcast. Click as soon as he appears. Hilarious
Understandable
We can arrange for that to happen
Same me and my friends used to cycle through all his specials everyday after school
Amen brother
The only thing funnier than Tom doing stand up is Tom laughing uncontrollably.
I agree!
I don’t know listening to Bert is equally amusing
Or Tom Dunking.
@@jmanxoom yes! Absolutely yes!
Yeah, at Bert especially
"That's Kevin. Why are you crying so much right now.".."She killed herself, she's dead now."
The Alabama farmer impression had me roaring with laughter on the floor
Yeah my face hurt after that joke
I'm from Alabama and that shit killed me 😂. He actually came to our city and did some shows a year ago or so. The first jokes he did when he came out on stage, were mocking the way we talk. Everyone in the room went crazy laughing.
I'm British and the British woman impersonation had me creased
Do do do do do do
Ahh tell you hhhwhat 🤠
My aunt and uncle have a kid with moderate Cerebral Palsy. He does funny shit all the time and he actually encourages other people to laugh at it because he loves the attention and he knows they are laughing because he has the disability.
That kid is amazing and he doesn't care because, in his own words, "it is what it is". He gets through it using humor. He even laughs at himself when he watches home movies.
What a champion he is.
Edit: He is not my cousin, he is fostered and not yet adopted. Aunt and Uncle can't have children so they are fostering children.
I am getting lots of people asking so I thought I would clear the air.
respect to that kid tbh
That's excellent, what a power champion !
Humor is such an amazingly healthy coping mechanism. My therapist straight up told me that if I hadn't been using humor to cope with my shit since like third grade, I probably wouldn't be alive today.
Major props to your cousin.
That’s beautiful tbh
You can try to have your cousin do a collab with Ricky Berwick
"Do you know how hard it is to do that impression without squinting?" 😂
Hilarious! 😂😂😂
Bobby Lee ~ "Hold my Redbull"
Probably the best line in this bit.
Oh O Hot Dog?
Oh white people
This is why we need comedians. We need to talk about serious stuff. But I'm a fun way.
apparently there are people with a special sense of humor who don't agree. it's a damn good thing i'm not one of 'em
Exactly
we've been raised to no talk about stuff. so things that really are not a thing turn in to problems. if we talked about, if we had a laugh, it might not turn in to a tragedy.
Laughing in church is the best kind of uncontrollable laughter
Tim went for an easy lay-up and now he parks in the blue spaces.
Right next to Bert 'Special Ed' Kreicher.
You mean Tom?
@@seanriopel3132 he means Sam
@@seanriopel3132 he means Todd
@@EljaeHD Who is Randy?
His pacing is absolutely fucking amazing.
Just because you recently taught yourself a term doesn't make you correct when you use it tard :)
@@r0br33r your comment history in this comment section is just sad lmao, touch grass for once in your miserable life
@Gustavao Apreciador de mamaco yo you actually told this kid to touch grass LOL my guy
@@gupinarelo kinda hypocritical to say touch grass to someone on the internet
@@Magst3r1 yeah. We should hunt him down and tell him in person, right? Dude said some dumb tough guy shit and got called out. What else can you do?
"If there's a 10k or a Quilt, it's pretty bad" ...FM that's hilarious.
I don't get it but English isn't my first language
@@Khramo What he means is donations for serious illnesses (such as Malaria, HIV, Cancer) can be made through 10ks (run races) and quilts. For the 10k's you can pay to sponsor the runner in the race and that money will go towards the charity/foundation and purchasing quilts will go towards the charity/foundation too. So the joke is basically serious illnesses aren't funny but syndromes like the cum*ing disorder he is talking about is funny
@@FragranceEuphoria Thank you for explaining to us slow individuals. 😅
@@FragranceEuphoria ohh thank you I was looking for this comment
My mate does stand up and he has Celberal Palsy, he's absolutely savage about it, one of his old shows was even called "CripLash"
Any chance he does stand up in San Diego ? I saw a comic with Celberal Palsy in a club years ago that was so funny
Gold bro.Does he have his material somewhere online we can see??
Oh my god I want to see him live
Josh Blue is a stand up with CP, it's even part of his jokes
"Can I see that shir-"
*AND I JIZZED IN MY PANTS*
Congrats momo! You've cracked the unoriginal code! You're subscribed to an unfunny hack!
@@r0br33r does it bother you much? You clearly put effort into that comment
People who have been using youtube a long time will understand your reference. I salute you for even remembering that lmao
Fuck dude I have to sleep tonight and now I have that in my head
At the end when he shouted: "What is happening?!" I genuinely spat out my coffee laughing.
Reminded me of micheal Scott, lol.
That was when I lost it too. Rewinded a few times 😂
God it really is the funniest fucking part. The way he goes from monotone, to a recording from inside Chernobyl's reactor control room with how authentic it was!
I’m dyslexic (which is technically a mental disability) and my brother is autistic, I joke about dyslexia the most, and my brother would be canceled with how many jokes he makes about autism.
People with disabilities make more jokes then anyone else. I love it
Yeah, unlike neurotypicals who are so up in arms about “oppression” and “prejudice”, we actually know what we are, and we’re able to joke about ourselves because it puts humor in our weaknesses.
If anything, I’d argue that it helps us with our disorders and other people’s understanding and awareness of it, and these everyday people are taking away an oppressed group’s coping mechanism against corporations investing on elimination of our existence, which IMO seems very ableist to me…oh the irony.
Joe, I’m not gonna lie
I’m kinda retarded
That laugh he did when he was ten had me in tears
HOW COME NOBODY ELSE… Tim’s timing is always amazing.
I don’t know who Tim is, but that’s funny! (Tom Segura)
Love Tim ! Way better than that hack Tom.
Timoy.
@@commaJim You mean that Japanese guy right?
seGURRRRAAAAA
"She's white, is fine". Oh lord! XD
This is the first time ive ever watched any Tom Segura stand up, and it had me howling with laughter!! 10/10.
'And she killed herself, shes dead' got me wheezing man, that shit was so good!!
All time fave is still steven Segal impression
I live in Australia and 25 years ago I had a friend who was hot by a bus and when he came out of his coma he spoke with a Canadian accent and still has it to this day.
Traded one of the sexiest accents for one of the worst. That bus knocked him into Toronto.
"Some people experience head trauma. Not funny."
As if we haven't seen 90% of YMH episodes 😂
Ayo right lmfao! Tom got us to bomb garth brooks ig
YMH?
@@radioactive_baby0706 Your Mom's House, Tom's podcast.
@@manovonor Ahhhhh okay. Thanks.
His "having a stroke" laughter got me. I busted a gut at that one. I remember trying to not laugh in serious situations as a kid, and how everything was 10 times funnier during those times, and the feeling of holding it in with everything you have so you don't ruin things. Good times.
One of the hardest things to do…..hold in a laugh when something is extremely funny. A little always comes out through your nose. Been there way too many times.
I'm sitting in a religious home watching this on a Sunday before work. The increase was tenfold lol
That’s where I lost it too. 😂
I'm trying not to laugh so I don't wake the family, now I'M HAVING a stroke!
I remember being unable to suppress a giggle when a dude in the psych facility I was temporarily at says"Anwar Sadat was in TV last night and he told me to kill infidels". He wasn't Muslim just schizophrenic. I got in trouble for laughing 😳. Can't help it, me and impulsivity are very close buddies.
My Sunday school teacher fell off her horse and now has an Irish accent. Shes Canadian.
She could just tell people she’s from Newfoundland and no one would bat an eye.
@@millacernemusic lol. She already kinda had the Newfie lilt to her voice. Maybe she went Irish cause it was already so similar?
@@millacernemusic I was gonna say... Some Canadians sound a bit Irish already.
i am in AWE of how funny this dude is.. ive known about him for a couple years via podcast but for some reason never checked out his stand up.... he is a LEGEND!!!
One of the best bits ever man. I was born with cystic fibrosis and the “10k or quilt” fucking killed me. So goddamn true. I’ll never understand how people don’t think this is funny. Have some humility for fucks sake.
Same here ( lhave a disability and think it's funny) the only time I don't think it's funny is when they are actually making fun of it to be mean
One of my favorites. But I don’t get the 10k or quilt joke? Sorry I’m slow lol
@@d-rock100 10k like the cancer marathons or quilt like AIDS
@@macsalama right on. I get it now. Thank you!
Oh sorry next time I’ll laugh when I finally understand what “10k or quilt” means
"she's white, it's fine" LMAOOOO
Like what a world we live in for Bert and Tom to make a podcast together. Two of the funniest guys to have ever graced comedy.
Perhaps my favorite stand up in the world right now
When I was in 8th grade we had a substitute we all hated. My buddy knocked something over and she went to yell at him. He decided to stutter a little bit and told her he had tourettes. The entire class silently decided in that moment that my buddy had tourettes and we messed with her every time we had her as a sub moving forward. Nothing major but he'd knock shit over and start twitching a little and one of us would volunteer to help him to the nurses office to take his meds. We'd actually just take a bathroom break and come back. I'm still proud of my class for never snitching
Wow. You all have a unique bond to be able to pull that off! That's a really good story. Thank you for sharing. :)
@@mmacaine it was a combination of it being a small town and the power of shared hatred towards this substitute lol
Dude that's fucking epic. I would've died.
When was that? Before smart phones and uploaded videos I'm thinking.
Joking aside, you had a real education. Tom Sawyer, not the sniveling cousin.
@@l.w.paradis2108 this was late 2007/early 2008 so the first iPhone was less than a year old. Makes me feel kind of old lol
I have Tourette’s and I have never laughed so hard in my life 😂🤣😂
...besides randomly in a library?
Lol! Nah really I joke and you are awesome for having a great sense of humor. Peace and love.
That must've felt good.
I can just imagine all the weirdos on Twitter losing their goddamn minds over his jokes calling him ableist and all that crap LOL
They did
This comment with the Joker profile pic to match... peak "we live in a society" moment over here lmao
@@bucket399 I mean people literally did that, I remember it very clearly
Finally gave this guy a shot. He delivers jokes so well. Good stuff.
"She killed herself shes dead..so"
"I watched a 10 year old break an old woman's spirit"
that's a brittle spirit
So sayeth the dave
grown, not old
@@mnemonichotpocket praise the dave
No, that was a really rough day, dude. They didn't even tell her. Substitutes make peanuts and only have high school diplomas. I'm sure he's exaggerating too. But if it was private school maybe he didn't have his own aid.
you try sustituting, you superior goober
“If there’s a 10K or a quilt.” 🤣🤣🤣
God, the wheezing thing when he's in mass?
Dude... I can never stop laughing at this. My wife thinks I'm insane but my stomach tenses up like a puking cat.
I have some disabilities including cerebral palsy and autism and was prepared to be offended. There are tears in my eyes from laughing. I love this guy. I have watched this clip so many times and laughed hysterically every time 😂
I'm re watching it again😅
Boondock Saints: "Fook! Ahss!"
The Mexican: "Hi Fook! Ahss! I'm Romeo!"
AHHHH MY FAVORITE MOVIE
As someone who has Tourette Syndrome, this was hilarious!
Would’a been cooler if you wrote fuck, for no reason………
I know it shouldn't be glamorized but sometimes the things that are said are really cute and sometimes really funny. I've heard that some ticks can be painful n I'm sorry for that. Thanks though for being of good cheer about it. Sometimes we laugh because it sounds funny not because you have the condition. Honestly yall sometimes say exactly what were all thinking but too afraid to say.
If you ever need to go to the DMV I will gladly take you for free.
@@nazz2406 As a person who has severe Tourette's thanks for remembering that it is still a disability as well. Don't worry about laughing it's really funny we can laugh too. Just thank you for knowing that it's a disability too.
I grew up in an old school Italian family in the 70’s. we used to have dinners with 35 people and 25 kids were everybody said profanities every second word. So when I actually met somebody with Tourette’s…it didn’t even phase me, I just thought he was my cousin 😆
This dude can always make me laugh no matter how shitty my day has been. He is a treasure.
The way everyone laughed at the end was so pure and kind of messed up. But pure 😂
100s of stand-up routines. First time I’ve cried laughing.
“Did you hear what I just fucking said?” Gets me every damn time 😂
I said "issabitovawiffleidn'it?" to a random Britsh person and straight away they said back "itISabitofawiffleIDn'it!?"
"That's Kevin, why you crying so much right now?" Lmfao 🤣🤣
I wish people would stop calling mocking an accent "racist". Accents are regional, not racial.
Meh they're still kinda racial due to segregation
ua-cam.com/video/iwDgA9LUVMA/v-deo.html
@@JonesySurvived ty for proving my point. Think for a second about why the video was even being taken in the first place.
@@NecroPyroLion I'm not actually arguing with you. I was just proving an unusual example. I appreciate it often _aligns_ commonly with a race due to historical geographic isolation.
But my point remains, an accent is merely regional. There is nothing about genetics that makes you speak a particular way. It's immediate surrounding culture that does that.
@@NecroPyroLion meh it’s not racial at all. Chinese people born in Australia speak with Australian accents and Indian people born in England speak with English accents so gtfo
I will never not laugh at Tom Segura’s jokes man 😂
7:41 I don't think I've ever heard a better punchline holy shit
"First of all ...do you know how hard it is to that impression (Chinese)...without squinting??" Funny shit.
The Tourette’s part made me howl uncontrollably mid flight, and that never happens. Maybe the funniest bit of all time.
I’m so stoned I’m in FOOKIN tears mate, FOOKIN hell.
that is the most amazingly accurate sweet chinese grandma imitation i have ever heard
I think MacKenzie Dern, a professional UFC fighter, is another possible example of foreign accent syndrome. A girl born and raised in Phoenix, whose probably taken a lot of big shots to the dome, speaks with a crazy Brazilian accent.
In all seriousness tho I think you’re right. She’s full blown Brazilian accent
That Brazilian 🍆 got her acting funny
Her father is Wellington "Megaton" Dias, he is brazilian and her jiu-jitsu instructor. So, obviously she got that accent from him
@@rolandovaldivia9847 but like her accent went from typical white girl to almost 2nd language English accent. Yeah she did probably get it from her dad, but she’s put some dedication towards that sus accent
She is half brazillian with a brazillian husband, every house in witch she ever lived speaks portuguese as native, and you are shocked that she has an accent?
The funniest disabilities are the ones as a result of 40 year old men trying to do a lay-up to defeat Burnt Chrysler
Aaaaaaaaaaaay 😂👌🏻
Lmfao if you knew anything about it youd say he already won. Had no need to do that last one.
@@holymacarenafin2319 Defeat him emotionally. Stop being so low and loose ya chodester
7:08 Tom saying "she doesn't know" is my new ringtone
To say this dude is funny is an understatement. He killed it. I haven’t laughed that hard in forever. 😂
This gave me hope, comedy isn’t dead
Yeah.
Tom is pretty damn funny.
@Foofy Foofer AH yes. The Southpark smelling farts and Ike tripping balls 😆
Not all tics are verbal. Some are physical. Imagine having to physically tic after having surgery.
I could have sworn you wrote "psychic"
@@user-gn4ts8jb7n 🤣
I have physical tic too due to some medication I was on for a really long time. My whole body will just seize up sometimes (which is terrifying when I'm driving)
As a disabled person, I appreciate you making jokes about disabled people because I feel the more you can relate to a joke the funnier it is. And the only people that get offended are…. People that arnt even disabled 💀💀💀
Every Tom Segura clip making me more of a fan with each of his bits. I love a good, screwy effed-up comic perspective to life.
I watched this while eating meat and rice. That was a mistake. Almost died choking on the rice from laughing so hard
You almost did a good thing, damn!
did you make stroke noises?
How is your, um, nose?
"and she killed herself, shes dead" LMFAOOOOOOO
I love the way he makes those grunting sounds and bops around a little, it's just funny af
"And she killed herself, she's dead, so..."
That delivery was priceless!!!!
*WHERE ARE THE BODIES, GARTH*
I’ve never really watched his stand-up before, but this is unbelievable! I had tears rolling down my face from laughing so hard😂🤣🤣🤣
Your life must be a giant unfunny joke
i’m in tears watching this tom is too funnt
"10k or a quilt" took me like 10 sec which made it even more hilarious
Im glad I was not at this special because I would’ve been gotten out of there in an ambulance due to damage to my abdominal wall breaking for laughing so hard!
Tom Segura, you are doing the Lord's work
The lord of low T and closet gays! Hey yah!
Check out your moms house podcast
Well he did go to church when he was at school
I had a patient who came back from her stroke with a funny accent lol. She says "what the hell" but it always sounds like " oh wat da hai-o" lol, she's so awesome.
“That shit never got old”
🤣🤣🤣
Underrated comedian for the past 10 years... He's one of the greatest
Really isn't, and isn't a comedian either.
I laughed so hard. This might be the funniest 8 minutes I’ve had in years. Thank you!
Haven’t laughed out loud in a while 😂 Thanks Tom
I watched this on a flight and cried with laughter, and the hostess brought me tissues because she thought I was sad. And the look she gave me when I showed her the title of the clip ….
Tom he's soo natural...his jokes hits you differently...he's crazy
I love Tom's side eye!
As an English person I have NEVER heard ANYONE said "it's a bit of a wiffle" - But I'm gonna start using it!!!!! :)
I laughed so hard at the Turrets bit my head hurt after.
Drawing circles on your face and saying “fuck you”
I love life
Ok here's the thing, if something like that doesn't get old after 3 years that means that shit was really funny and no one there has a sense of humor
this joke had me laughing harder than I ever had
"She killed herself she's dead" made me burst out laughing lmao
5:40 I had tears running down MY eyes lmfao LOL!
That poor kid with Tourette’s. As someone who’s had to deal with it all my life I can tell you that it SUCKS when people make a big deal of your tics.
"How come..... nobody else.... is laughing" lol
I dont normally laugh at comedians but the dark humor got me HOWOLIN