Zoe, I have been critiqued so much. I never feel comfortable with people's perceptions of what I eat and how much I weigh. But you are always happy with me. Thank you for all these videos. You are the only person on UA-cam who really understands this.
Since I was a kid I am skinny Like I am 19 years old and 40kgs, I am not too skinny though But according to Indian beauty standards I am way too skinny But still I have a curvy body My mom and everyone like every single person in my life tell me to eat more. In my house I am literally forced to eat more and sometimes because of this I got sick too... But people are always like having a slim body is privilege and when we say "I want to gain some weight" or something like that we are criticizing the plus size people Like seriously?.....🙄
Origato Zoe. I enjoy all your videos. I love how you inspire & motivate people. I'll like you to know that I admire you & your personality. This is why I look up to you, as my new role model💜💜💜
Hi Zoe!!! I just wanted to share my experience in the means of food, as a currently plus-sized 17 yr old. I used to be afraid of eating things like salads, fruit bowls, or anything that could be classified as "diet food" in public, because I didn't want to be perceived that certain way. When you mentioned not eating certain foods because you didn't want to be stereotyped, I really connected with that. I've made the decision to take care of my body, regardless of stereotypes
It’s all about health, if you exercise the recommended amount and eat the healthiest foods you possibly can and you happen to be thin or thick then who cares? You’ll feel amazing because you’re healthy and that’s all that matters
I never understood why people feel the need to comment on other people’s bodies. No matter if positive or negative, no matter what size. It’s literally no one’s business.
Exactly you just have to mind your own business ,if you have a problem with yourself you should find help but dragging other people won’t make you feel better it will only make it worse
Back when I was "skinny", my mom used to tell me that a real woman has curves and that men wouldn't like my body. Also my sister told me I looked like a starving child from a third world country... I am not sure if that was body shaming, but it hurt and made me self-conscious about my appearance.
That is body shaming, and that is really cold of them to say those things. Wonder what they’re thinking in their heads when they said those hurtful things to you. They probably should’ve apologized on the spot, especially if they saw you hurt.
“Everyone wants to be loved. But the one person everyone wants to be loved by the most is not their mother, their father, friends, or partner. It is the person staring back at them in the mirror.”
can we just appreciate how zoe talks about a LOT of controversial topics, whether popular or unpopular? all are equally important to know and discuss. 💗
I really don’t like when people say “finally, REAL women are shown”. Are skinny women not real? Why should real only mean fat? How is fat shaming not okay but skinny shaming okay? Body shaming is body shaming, regardless of size. And none of it is okay.
Yeah that makes me so mad. I hate how so many people (men particularly say this kind of crap) think a woman’s body is what makes her. Society is crazy.
Yes you are right but just to add an insight I think by « real » maybe it is meant to be or should be the more common¿ at least from what I can tell from the people around me the common look of women aren’t either very skinny or very big but just in between which, at least for me, can be closest to real of that makes sense
My college best friend thought that I was a dysphoric homosexual woman for simply being skinny and lacking curves! I have no issues with getting called lesbian, but she actually thought that I was going to be a pervert to her. I also had a friend telling me that "it's alright, skinny people don't have them." like seriously? They think skinny people actually have no curves at all.
As a skinny black girl, in an African home, having lived all my life in an African country where the beauty standard is curvy I can relate to this title on a spiritual level... My life is a series of backhanded compliments and outright body shaming from friends, family and complete strangers. If I had a dollar for every time I heard "do you even eat?" "You really should eat" "take better care of yourself" and the almighty"y'know no man will ever want you" I'd own a house in the Bahamas lol
I’m sorry! That should NEVER happen, but unfortunately, it does. I hope that it does stop, and that you never take the words to heart because you’re fine, just do what makes yourself happy
Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experience, as I come from a very caucasian tiny, isolated farm town and I never thought about the intersectionality of race and skinny-shaming.
Skinny shaming does exist and it's even more prevalent in people of color. Latinas and African women are shamed for being too skinny or don't have large enough curves. I grew up being shamed my siblings grew up being shamed for being "fat". You can't please anyone. I've had thicker friends who were ashamed of their bodies and I would always tell them they were beautiful. These same people started shaming me for being too skinny....the irony
as a latina, im told that im not a real latina because of my lack of curves like what ??😭 where im from being skinny means you have no money and are from a “bad” area so id have relatives telling me to eat like a pig💀
same with indian women. im told my body doesn't suit my own ancestral and traditional attires because i lack the fat and curves (even though my ancestors look like this too). "too masculine" cause healthy with some muscle definition.
Edit: I was very confused my why people were mad at the use of the word ghettos, because where I live its a place. But I guess not all black communities causally say that word the same way not all black people say the n word 😅
@@methzuckerberg7592 as a Brazilian, I completely agree with what you said, I would go as far as saying that being skinny were I live is a bit worse than being overweight, they have this mentality of "If you are overweight, you have money enough to maintain that type of body" sooooo in the end, skinny people are associated with poverty, it sucks, I got made fun of during middle school and it still going
when I hear people claim "skinny shaming doesn't exist" I think back about how my younger sister was literally bullied for being too skinny, while I was bullied for being fat. Yeah, skinny and fat shaming are two different things, but they hurt all the same! She grew up thinking she wanted to have "curves" like me, I grew up thinking I wanted to be skinny like her. The fact that we both borrowed the same sweater from my mom, and we BOTH thought it looked better on the other really opened my eyes
they do not all hurt the same 😭 i’ve been a size 0 and under my entire life and being called “bone thug” will never hurt as bad as being told “loose weight you look like a whale”
@@nyaxj7149 I recognize that my experience doesn't apply to everyone! I think the fact is that in this society being thin (even dangerously so) it's seen as valuable, so subconsciously it might hurt more to be called fat. What I meant, if I could put it better, is that both types of bullying and abuse are horrible and hurt people's self esteem (to varying degrees, depends on the person). Anyway I'm sorry that you have been made to feel too much and not enough. You are valuable and I hope you have a wonderful day
@@nyaxj7149 stop trying to make it a competition by saying which one hurts more. What matters is both hurt. And you've not been on the other side so you don't know how it feels to be fat-shamed.
I lost 80 lbs, had been overweight and shamed for that all my life. When losing weight, there was not a day people weren't commenting on my body. When I reached my goals, then people began to complain I lost too much weight. You can't win 🤷
Seriously!! Why does your body matter so much to them? We are all on our own life journey, as well as health journey. Vanity is such a huge aspect when it comes to our bodies, and it’s disgusting. My body is not attached to my character. And it is of no concern to anyone else, friends, family, even SO. My body, my choices :)
So true!! This happened to me! Was very skinny my whole life. .got mocked endlessly by the "perfect body females",. . Then I had a hysterectomy years later that messed up my hormones and I gained 25lbs on my 5"2 thin frame and looked quite chubby and got mocked by "friends and family",.. I've lost almost all the weight in a need to get healthy due to poor blood work, and now I'm constantly told by heavy women how skinny I am ( as if I didn't know that myself), I've often wondered, " I wonder what your reaction would be if I told you frequently, how heavy you are, how you would feel?" But, I'm just not that kind of person. Unlike those around me, I don't focus on my friends weight. Isn't it about the person they are? I go way out of my way to compliment ladies everywhere, just to remind them of their beauty. We need to support each other against this trend where women side against each other!!
Also, we need more medium body representation! Now brands have "plus sized models" but they are always placed next to the traditional, super thin model. They reenforce negative mentalities when placed next to each other, without any recognition that there is a wide range of bodies in between!
Right? I don't even know what I am half the time. I am someone who has a naturally big butt and boobs but bcoz I don't have a flat stomach or toned arms or legs I am called plus size, but when I search what plus size is, I see NONE of those representations look like me. And it really pissed me off to the point where I start crying 😂bcoz it makes me think my body isn't normal and there's something wrong with me
@@yourmumschesthair4009 If it makes you feel better, by what you described it seems you have a pretty normal body (I mean all bodies are normal of course). From my experience, most people are more in-between
You mean sizes? I'm sure clothes range from xs to xl or even xxl, xxxl etc. Just buy the size that is yours. The models are only there so you can tell what the clothes actually look like and how is it worn. Or to give you styling ideas.
I remember being called a “size zero whore” in middle school by someone in high school. I think about it from time to time. I hope that person is okay.
Yea, the beauty standard isn’t being skinny, it is being skinny but having huge boobs, butt and hips. This is just nearly unachievable. I have small boobs, but I’m fortunately never body shamed
@@phucbich7581 Actually yes, the western beauty standards is to have wide hips yet a thigh gap, big boobs and ass which is really sad because it's actually kind of hard to achieve naturally.
@@elcb845 do skinny people really get bashed on? Unless you are actually underweight, then people make fun of you for looking unhealthy which isn't ok. But regular slim people aren't body shamed
As a skinny black/African girl, I relate to this title on a spiritual level. People/parents never keep quiet about my body, collar bones, arms etc Plus, there’s a general lack of empathy for skinny shaming that a lot of people have.
I relate to you so much. As a skinny black/African girl with serious body dysmorphia, I've always felt so alone. I've been told that I shouldn't critique the way I look because I fit the "beauty standard" and yet I'm told that I don't have enough "meat on my bones" and that I'm flat. I'm constantly skinny shamed by everyone around me and it affects me both physically and mentally. People have no care in the world about the way I feel because at the end of the day skinny is the "beauty standard". NO IT'S NOT. Slim-thick is the beauty standard. I don't have curves, I don't have thick thighs, I don't have an ass, I don't even have boobs. I'm completely flat. I force myself to eat more food in hopes that I gain weight but nothing is working so I'm trying to accept the way I am. its really hard but I am trying! I hope by sharing this you don't feel alone
Same for me! As an African girl, the beauty standards around here is being thick or slim thick. I am skinny and I get bodyshamed for being flat and not curvy as a "real woman" should be. It really sucks. I cant wear certain outfits, afraid to appear extremely flat and it gives me social anxiety as well as body dysmorphia.
I’m Latina and African but I’m pretty skinny. I hate it so much bc not only do both cultures skinny shame, they also say whatever is on their minds. Like no filter.
I always hear something among the lines of “how does it feel to go shopping and always finding things that fit you?” Like idk… nothing really fits me, I have to fix pretty much every single item I buy.
Yeah they are putt my waaaay too much stock in the fashion industry to make clothing that fits anyone. I’m skinny, I still have to dedicate a day to finding a pair of jeans that fit because fashion can’t agree on what sizes mean.
I think it is kind of encouraged in the body positivity community to see skinny girls as the enemy. As the mean girl that needs to be taken down a peg.
The mentality is literally this: out of everyone skinny girls have the least to be insecure about. Which is fucked up but also kinda true. But I don't think that should invalidate the problems and insecurities skinny ppl face daily.
This topic really needed to be discussed. I'm tired of being compared to a twig or a broomstick or a pencil , even by my parents . People skinny shame others without even realising it
I’m called chopstick 🙃 even before the whole Kim k body type craze. In 2005, I was in first grade and going through elementary during the early 2000s…I was STILL skinny shamed. When that was THEE look of the time. I’m starting to think it’ll never go away, for either skinny or fat people. We just need to preach kindness, I suppose :/
It gets so toxic so fast. My mom, as much as I love her, practically pitted my sisters and I against each other because my mom was plus size and I was more curvy, but my sisters were naturally underweight (to where it raised health concerns). She'd make comments a lot when we were growing up because I was "more like her" and my sisters were "sticks". 1. I felt fat and got scared by the comments and 2. My sisters felt so unfeminine and ashamed due to the comments. Its just all around bad to make the comments. Just give compliments where you mean them and show concern when it's a health matter and otherwise just love and let live
The whole fat vs. skinny shaming situation is that the same people that say "everyone's feelings are valid" get upset when people that they feel are "privileged" try to express their feelings. Having the ideal body type does not magically cure mental health or EDs. It sucks that in order to elevate one group of people we seem to be degrading another.
This is so true. I wonder what the psychological term is for people who get work done and say they are confident. Is it a placebo effect that only last for a bit or does it actually provide long lasting emotional well-being.
I kinda feel that way about people who are conventionally attractive when they try to discuss their experiences with “pretty privilege”. When some say that they necessarily don’t mind the privilege, it really sucks to see someone else immediately try to shame them for not completely being uncomfortable with how they look
because only one body type are victim to regular medical malpractice and are systemically discriminated against and its not skinny people. hope that helps
@@jazzyfacts this is wrong and right tho. Too skinny are also a health risk for some people. However, there are some people who are naturally skinny and fat due to metabolism and other factors their DNA gave them. And they are just a healthy as the other according to Dr. So, people should just do whatever is heathy for them.
@@andromedamessier3176 thats not what im saying though, im saying that skinny people will never be refused medical attention for being too skinny while fat people are extremely frequently denied medical care because their pain is always attributed to their weight. bodyshaming is always bad but skinnyphobia isn't real since it's not an actual system of oppression.
GIIRRRRLLLL!! I felt this in my SOUL because you are not the only one who feels this way. We can appreciate all bodies without making anyone feel bad or less than 💜.
a 'friend' (hes a boy) of mine once grabbed my chest, and when i asked why he did it he said "it's not sexual harassment if there's nothing to touch". even my best friends make a comment at least once a week about my body, whether its calling my flat or commenting about my wrists. i never really had thought about me being 'flat' before, because i didn't think i was. but them showing that they saw me as flat made me a whole lot more insecure, and i changed the clothing that i wore to try and make my body seem different than it is. i've never said anything in response, because what would i even say? i didnt even realize until after watching this video that it counted as body shaming. even my dad tells me that im too skinny and i should eat more :/
That definitely was sexual assault and you don’t deserve any of that treatment. It sounds like he said that to shock you into not retaliating. I’m so sorry.
@@onechubbydoggo9444 your experience is antidotal. There are plenty of communities that shame bodies for not being “enough” for their standards where being skinny is acceptable as long as you have big boobs and a butt
@@darkopacity o no I'm not saying it doesn't exist or that my experience is everyone else's I'm just wondering how skinny some of these ppl in the comments are to be skinny shamed relentlessly because i have lived in America, the uk, and Germany and not been skinny shamed once even though I'm really skinny
I’ve been fat and really thin so I’ve been both fat shamed and skinny shamed. Neither feels good because you are being singled out for how you look. Body neutrality should be the goal. Loving our bodies for what they can do should be the goal.
I was bullied and always accused of having big lips or so called "duck lips" , but now having big lips is the beauty standard and people always accuse / claim that i have had fillers injected. First it angered me how people's opinions can change , but now i only find it funny. (P.S : have lip fillers if u want to , don't if u don't want to but pls don't judge/make it ur business to find out abt other people's surgeries or what not . A person will tell u if they want to. Not that it matters . )
Sameeeee! The duck and the faces! When i was a teen (+ 10yrs ago) a girl asked me why I injected my lips because my bottom lip has a line in the middle.. and i was like: gurl what?!
I was so insecure with my lips before because i have big lips compared to my classmates, but now i love it because it suits me and i look so beautiful specially with lipstick 😭
I have bigger lips too. Ever since like the 6th grade, I’ve been told by boys/men that I have DSLs 😒 poor little 11/12 year old me finding out what that was… while I was still ATTENDING A DAYCARE like damn… (i couldn’t be trusted at home alone bc one time I tried to cook mac and cheese in a pot in the microwave and almost set the house on fire whoops)
I still think it's weird how people don't think that skinny shaming is real. YOU CAN BE SKINNY AND INSECURE since the perfect body has been "tiny waist but with big boobs and butt" years now...You need to be thin but you also need to "look feminine" for many people to think that you look healthy. It makes no sense literally nobody can win who wouldn't be insecure. Can we just leave all women alone and not judge their bodies ESPECIALLY in front of them?Why do some people feel the need to say shit like "oh you need to lose some weight" or "oh eat a burger". This is not "caring for them" this is shaming. I've literally been told "hey stop dieting" when I've never really done it lol. Naturally skinny people exist like heavier people exist. Accept it or at least mind your own business.
you honestly can never win. if you’re fat you’re fat shamed, if you skinny you’re skinny shamed and if you’re the ideal body of skinny waist and curves you get constantly sexualised and reduced down to how sexy your body is and you as a person is completely overlooked. we can never win. that’s why we should just tell people who make comments about our bodies to f*ck off and just live our lives how we want to
gonna be controversial and say that the backlash against skinny people in the body positivity movement is somewhat valid, but let me explain. I want to be clear that I 100% agree that no one deserves to be shamed for their bodies and skinny shaming is absolutely a thing. Nowadays people look at the body positivity movement as something that's about feeling good in your body, which is absolutely important, but that wasn't the intended revolutionary goal. The point was to combat fatphobia as a whole and not just fat shaming and there is an important distinction between those things. Fatphobia is more than just mean comments, its bias in medicine where fat people have to fight to for doctors to take their valid health concerns seriously without them being dismissed as just having to lose weight. Its the fact that the doctor's office only has chairs that are big enough to fit people of a certain size or scales that can only take people up to a certain weight leading them to need to get weighed on industrial scales instead. It's the fact that fat people are discriminated against when in comes to employment opportunities, especially in front facing positions. The body positivity movement has turned into skinny people and small fat people saying things like "buy that dress and f anyone who says something mean about it" but the fact is you can't buy that dress if they don't sell it in your size. I don't deny that skinny shaming hurts or that it can have a real effect on people, but there is a valid reason why some people are so upset that the movement has been co-opted by smaller bodies. The issue is bigger than mean comments, but mean comments are now the focus of the movement because that's the only part that skinnier people have to deal with.
@@amentrison2794 I’m sorry but skinny people absolutely do get discriminated too, in both the workplace and healthcare. My point is just that I sometimes feel that the “body positivity” movement is used as an excuse by some to target another body type and get away with it. There are countries outside the USA (you might’ve heard of some from a few comments maybe) where being “skinny” is seen as being a lot worse than being “fat.” Particularly because body fat is needed by women to have a good reproductive health. Truthfully, this is all just a double edged sword.
@@hi-ls6lt I agree that the context around being skinny is different in non-western countries, with that overlapping with developing countries. I also agree that body positivity can be used in a weaponized way. That being said, genuine question, can you provide some examples on the ways that skinny people are discriminated against in the workplace and in healthcare, outside of just negative comments (which I 100% agree are also bad)?
Why would anyone want to gatekeep having a bad body image? Anyone can have body dysmorphia or eating issues. It’s *not* limited by body size, gender, etc. We all really need to work on supporting each other more.
Thank you. I'm tired of people saying that being skinny is easy. There are two types of "skinny". There is the desired and there is the "true skinny" . When you are skinny with an ectomorph body shape, people WILL bodyshame you, call you a 'twig' , etc.. You will try to gain weight, but with a fast metabolism, that will be very hard! I'm not saying that we have more problems than overweight women (specially because being skinny is more socially accepted than being fat). I'm saying we too have struggles
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans not run out of energy but kind of hard to gain resistance, you can gain muscle mass but without protein pills or shakes to help with that, the change won't be too dramatic
Body neutrality is so important. As someone who has struggled with several types of EDs, a big step in recovery has been to internalize the mentality of "even if i hate my body right now, it still deserves to be taken care of properly"
Same for me! As an African girl, the beauty standards around here is being thick or slim thick. I am skinny and I get bodyshamed for being flat and not curvy as a "real woman" should be. It really sucks. I cant wear certain outfits, afraid to appear extremely flat and it gives me social anxiety as well as body dysmorphia.
You realize being skinny /= not having curves right?? You can be skinny and have curves, and you can be fat and have nothing that's sexually attractive. We're talking about FAT as in HUUGE people not thick or curvy people.
@@glistening7178 I think you lost the memo here. The main subject here is about skinny shaming not fat people. But of course, for context, other sizes are being mentioned. Also, in the black community, it does not matter if you're skinny but have an hourglass figure, you're still seen as someone that needs to gain weight. This person is sharing her experience and it feels like you're trying to invalidate them. Umm and you do realize that thick and curvy people get fat shamed as well right? How did you end up with this video and conversation being about huge people?💀
You should read Fledgling by Octavia Butler! The lead woman character, Shori, is small, petite, and dark skinned and is seen as being incredibly pretty and sexy
Girl i feel you, i experienced that when i visited my family members from coast and they all kept discussing how skinny i was, i was forced to eat more than i can handle and one old lady had the audacity to tell me i cannot get married with that kinda skinny body😭 i cried
I don't care if you're thin, athletic, midsize, or fat. Everyone has the right to love their bodies. People need to stop focusing on gatekeeping other people's bodies, and should worry about themselves instead.
When I was 12yo, a girl mocked me just because I was skinnier than her. She said my clothes are wearing me and I looked ugly 🫠 When I gained weight during uni days, a boy was calling me fat and making me feel bad every time I eat more than what he assumes the portion size a girl would eat. When I got more muscular, people tell me my arms are getting to big for a girl. Everyone’s gonna have something to say all the time, no matter how much you change your body. And I believe it all stems from their own insecurities. So, the most important thing isn’t to become the body you think people want, but to be strong and feel good and healthy in your body.
The fact that being skinny isnt enough, you also need boobs and an ass your back cant support 🤷🏻♀️. I've been naturally skinny my whole life and i was either teased growing up or not fitting in in today's society. Pain is pain always. Skinny/fat shaming is not the same pain but they both are legit pain
Exactly the skinny girls they talk about when they say "it's the norm" still have boobs and ass That's what really matter to people,if you're that skinny that you don't get to have "curves" you get bullied. Talking from personal experience
@@Kaworubeliever Im sure you are beautiful just the way you are. But if you are still interested in gaining weight and getting a big butt. You can get a big butt by lifting even if it is not in your genetics to have a big butt. I would recommend for you to get into weightlifting and track your calories on myfitnesspal. If you prefer to workout at home, all you need is dumbbells in order to start lifting weights. But you can also go to the gym if you want. The healthiest way to gain weight is to lift weights and eat a healthy balanced diet. This is the healthiest way because you will build muscle and exercise which has health benefits and you will be eating a healthy balanced diet instead of eating junk food and being sedentary to try and gain weight. Plus if you lean bulk and lift weights you can look lean and toned when you gain weight. Since some of the weight will be muscle instead of solely just fat. BTW lifting weights will not make you look too bulky or manly or like a bodybuilder. It takes years for female bodybuilders to look the way they do and they have to eat a certain way to look like they do. Women who lift can look feminine and curvaceous like Yanet Garcia, Tiana Musarra, Kaurbeauty (on youtube), Amouranth (on youtube), Alicia Parr, etc. I just want to point this out there because some women do not know this. BTW in order to get a bigger butt through exercise, you have to make sure you are taking in more calories than you burn. This is why I recommended for you to track your calories on myfitnesspal. So that you will get an idea of how much calories you are taking in. Sometimes people think they are eating more or less calories than they are actually eating. Tracking your calories can help you better get an idea of how much you are eating. Also in terms of the exercise, I will recommend for you to follow a personal trainer workout program. A lot of people do not know how to create their own program on their own. You can use bret contreras free workout program on his website or you can work with him or a different personal trainer online or in person to come up with a personalized training program for you. If you want to find out how to gain weight by lifting weights, go to the links below: ua-cam.com/video/UgU4DpJxfFU/v-deo.html bretcontreras.com/how-to-design-an-optimal-glute-training-program/
honestly skinny and flat people have some great advantages 1) they can shop in the kids section 2) they can make themselves clothes and use less fabric 3) they can run faster because they don’t have useless boobage weighing them down 4) they can look fashionable by wearing super loose and drapey layered clothes 5) they could pretend to be a man in emergencies or all the time (would if i could) those are just a couple but i’m jealous of all of the flat ppl. if i could donate my 30F balloons to someone who wants them more than me i would.
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans Well I guess I should only speak for myself on this. But I think it's not a compliment or a good thing to be an adult woman and have to shop in the kids section and pass off as a man to people just because you do not have curves. I'm an adult female, why would I want to look like a man or dress like a little kid? Also just because someone is not curvy does not mean they can fit into kids clothes. For example, if someone is tall and not curvy. The kids clothes will be too short for them. Also kids style is different than adult style. So why would a grown woman curvy or not curvy want to dress like a little kid? Also the man part is especially offensive. Women are very beautiful, whether they are curvy or not. There is an obvious difference between a man and woman's face and women bodies still look different than a man even when their boobs and butts are small. So why would you think that they can pass off as a man to people?
@@compatissantelegante4477 i didn’t think of it that way i guess, that’s all on me i’m sorry. the kids clothes in my opinion would be mainly for shirts. and kid clothes can be cheaper. and second, i guess it’s just me who’d like to be able to pass as a man sometimes then. i thought that was a compliment, to be able to seem boyish enough to be treated as a boy would. i apologize for having said potentially harmful things :/
I just wanted to say how rude it is to hear someone telling you “are you anorexic?” even when you ARE so I can’t imagine how it is when you are not… LOVE YOU ALL
Whenever I said I'm not comfortable with my body I got called out for, because I have the 'perfect' hourglass shape. Like thanks, I didn't ask to be sexualised when I was a kid. Skinny and fat shaming are bad. Body shaming, no matter your body type is bad. I wish more people understood this. Thank you for the video. It means a lot.
no bc dead ass. I have a slim thick body and yeah, I love my body and many have complimented me for it. but you know the downside? being sexualized 24/7. it's uncomfortable AF when everyone just only talks about your body as if nothing else matters about you. that's the downside of it. It's uncomfortable AF.
As someone who’s been bullied for being fat, and doesn’t know what it’s like to go through that.. I’m sorry you did and your struggles are just as valid.
Yeah ive heard even people with the "ideal" slim thick body somehow get instantly categorized as sluts. Same thing with people w big boobs being instantly sexualized even as children. Im a super thin, flat person myself and while i have experienced pretty brutal bullying for being underweight, ive never had to deal with someone calling me a whore or anything. Just goes to show you literally no matter what body type u have, seems othet people will mock or degrade u regardless so u might as well just not give af lol
Can I just say thank you…..THANK YOU!!!! I feel like I can’t even post about my body because it’ll look like I’m bragging about being skinny when all I wanna do is show off my cute outfit. I get so many comments about my weight at work (all meant as jokes) but after a while it gets to you. Thanks for making this video ❤️
I'm so happy this is finally being talked about. Born in a Hispanic household, it's always a burden hearing my mom and female relatives say that I'm too skinny/flat because that's not what men are interested in, like I have to find my validation from what people think about me. There was a comment stating that skinny shaming is more common in people of color, and that's absolutely true. Most of my family is curvy with thick thighs and chest, unlike me, which is why I tend to get targeted more from them. I recently started to ignore them and start working on myself, but the insecurities are still there. Everyone is beautiful in their own way, and you guys are too
I've never been skinny a day in my life, so I've only personally experienced fat shaming. However, I have seen skinny shaming too. I knew a girl in high school that was very skinny and people always shamed her for being so thin and would get called names on a daily basis by men and women alike. It hurt to see how much it affected her and she became so self conscious that she later developed an ED. I always felt bad for her and didn't understand how the same people fat shaming me could be skinny shaming her. It doesn't make any sense. I wish the world would just realize that other people's bodies aren't anyone's business
I had a dysmorphic view of my body when I was my “skinniest” when I was struggling with anorexia in high school. I’ve since recovered, but now I find myself slipping into the same shaming behaviors the girls in the opening clips were engaging in. The other day, I saw a Tik tok in which a girl who was “thin” talked about how she wanted body inclusivity to be a permanent feature of the fashion industry. I reflexively started criticizing her: how dare she make that argument when she’s not even “fat” like me! As I was ranting about this to a friend, I suddenly realized that I was being extremely hypocritical, since in so many ways I hate the claim that someone can’t speak to a particular issue because they don’t “fit in the right category”. I realized that I was simply projecting my own insecurities on her, since I am still quite insecure about my appearance. I think that is one of the root problems of the issue you speak about here. I don’t usually write comments or give my opinions on videos in which I do not know the creator, but I felt compelled to do so this time. You have given me a lot to think about.
when a fat person is complimented on their confidence, it’s so backhanded. they will be complimented on “confidence” for wearing what any thin person would wear as if saying that they are brave to wear that with the body they have. it isn’t a good thing at all
So happy you’re talking about this Zoe! Also it’s not always about how people look at you, it’s being too small to fit into certain clothes or having to buy childish bra because none of the others fit. It’s a huge confidence sink, everyone has insecurities and no one ever deserves to be told they aren’t valid.
At this point I don’t wear bras at all. I don’t need the support so what’s the point. It’s been very freeing and I feel lucky that I don’t need to wear a boob cage like my bestie who has a big bust does.
I remember being told that I look like a skeleton covered in skin, being constantly told that I need to eat more, and to please put on some weight. I have heard the "real women have curves" shit so many times that I would probably be rich by now if they had given me a dollar for each time someone said it to me. Once, while I was in high school, I was at a mall checking some clothes and a girl approached me and asked if I used the toothbrush to help myself vomit... And I wasn't even that skinny. It is painful to have people assume that you have an ED, because it means you look sick, which is in no way a beauty standard anywhere. I was voted one of the ugliest girls in my class when I was 15, and I was one of the skinniest ones. Being skinny does not grant you being beautiful or being popular, if anything, it only enables other people to talk shit about your body without feeling guilty or ashamed like they do when they talk about larger body types. None of my friends who are overweight have ever been told to their faces that they need to lose weight, yet I have been told several times that I should gain some weight... Double standards anyone? I am not saying that skinny people have it harder than fat people, I know we don't, but it is painful because I would never diminish or deny other people's struggles with how society perceives them or discriminate against them, and yet many of those people who have been discriminated for their weight and know what it feels like think that skinny shaming is not a real thing or a problem at all.
I have gastroparesis, I have been on both sides of the scale and people always have something to say. Skinny shaming is just as damaging, especially when health issues are to blame. Countless women in my chronic illness groups feel traumatized by just trying to exist in a sick body and people commenting on their weight.
The bopo movement also tells me I'm not allowed to be body positive because I am not fat enough even though I have a marginalized body as a disabled person.
@@hopehughes2423 I also have a digestive disorder that caused me to loose 150lbs in 10 months. It’s heartbreaking when being skinny/underweight comes from a digestive disease.
@@hopehughes2423 Thank you! I’m sorry you had to experience skinny shaming too. I hope your gastroparesis gets better🙏 I actually went from 300lbs and I’m down to 150lbs maybe even less😖😖but I’m tall so I look deathly skinny even though I eat but my digestive disease/disorder makes me look ill. How do you deal with your gastroparesis? It’s a paralyzed stomach right?☹️😔
I'm a skinny girl with vitiligo, ive gotten so many "anorexic cow" comments when i was younger i forced myself to eat a lot of caloric foods, who made me throw up at the end of the day. As i got older and found good friends, i started to Invest more in what my body can do, than what it can look like, and decided to work out and gain strenght, which helped me out a lot, both mentally and physically. I still have a weird relationship with food, but Im working on improving it more and more everyday.
stop using vitiligo for attention, your pfp clearly doesn’t show a girl with vitiligo. And if it’s a google image,you’re a kid trying to hide your face.you’re trying to love your body? Show your real face.
@@UnicornBySprinkle Im not using it for attention, i have it mostly on my arms and knees, and the patches i had on my right cheek disappeared after puberty, i have it since i was 4yo. What baffles me is how offended you got by someone talking about self-improvement and self-acceptance. I'm not fishing for likes or approval i was only telling my story and my journey, i apologize if i gave the wrong impression.
A doctor asked me if I’d gained or lost weight recently coz i was having stomach issues and i said that I’d gained about 10 pounds and she laughed and said you gained and still only weigh this much? A DOCTOR
a doctor asked me if I ever tried to put a toothbrush to force myself to vomit or anything as such, because I was too skinny I had to be anorexic I was 16 years old, very embarrassing situation
As a person who's both been skinny and fat shamed, I agree that both hurt. But like you, I've come to accept that my self worth isn't tied to others' perception of my body. I'm comfortable in my skin and that's what matters.
My 11 year old daughter was just telling me how she is constantly feeling bullied at school about being tall and thin. We’re talking 5’6, 00/000 jeans size, in 6th grade. Easily a head taller than everyone she knows. She is absolutely beautiful and has such a kind heart. I just told her she’s beautiful and not to let other people’s words define her view of herself or her self worth. I wish this was talked about more.
Your daughter is fabulous and I hope you tell her every day. I was her once and now I’m an adult woman wearing a 0. Same height. We’re graceful and elegant.
"Skinny shaming isn't a thing" Say that to my 18 year-old self who was crying in the school's bathroom because my PE teacher screamed from the other part of the gym that my parents are not feeding me and that I only eat on mondays. (I wasn't even that underweight, I was just training a lot for an admission exam) She wouldn't have dared to say anything to my chubbier colleagues
I think that the problem is that skinny shaming is done with envy and hate because "it's the beauty standard", while the concept of fat shaming is that "fat is ugly". (note that I DON'T FEEL THIS WAY, it's just what I've noticed). I had a friend, very cute, petite frame with some curves, skinny shame one of my other friends because "she's so tall and skinny, she looks like an an0rexic b1tch". She was obviously just envious. I once heard a girl, she had a small chest, talking about that petite friend of mine saying "look, that's when you realize a person is a wh0re. She obviously has a pushup bra and is arching her back", while she just has big but still perky boobs. It's all based in envy. While on the other hand, being fat shamed is just for pure hate and oppression (I was fat myself). I have always had a pretty face, I have to admit it, so I've never been called ugly. But I was called tub of lard, whale, I've been told that I "smell like a fat pig", that I would break chairs, and once an old classmate of mine kicked me in the ass because he wanted to make me fall and "dig a hole till the middle of the Earth". So I agree that in general fat shaming is more of an oppressive thing, but skinny shaming exists too. It's just different.
The only thing I disagree with is the use of the word “oppressive” I think it’s just bad wording tbh, I was fat too I got bullied for being fat but being bullied is not the same thing as being oppressed. If being bullied/shamed for my body is oppression then I personally and now more oppressed now that I lost the weight, no has ever spoken more hatefully, more rudely, more negatively about my body than they ever did when I was fat. I’m obviously not oppressed but I hope you kinda get what I’m saying lol
So being called anorexic, stick figure, and starved, and not a real woman, the walking dead, and being forced to eat twice the amount your whole family eats because "no one will want to marry a twig" is out of envy only? Then my whole family must really be envious of my cousin including her own dad. Hard to agree with that. But I respect your point of view though I feel is very biased. And why are we calling that oppression though? That is not oppression.
I think with some cases of skinny shaming it's because the shamer is envious/jealous of the person they are shaming, whilst with fat shaming this (I assume) never happens because of envy and jealousy. One of my colleagues asked me "have you noticed the increase of body diversity in the media lately? Surely things are getting better" and I replied "I still don't know anyone who wants to be fat." I'm sure a lot of skinny shaming happens not because of envy/jealousy, but because their body is deemed ugly or "not the right kind of skinny" by the shamer. Likewise, many shamers think most fat bodies are ugly, but there is an added element of the moralization of weight which means fat people are thought of as dumb, lazy and greedy (gluttony and sloth). People deemed too skinny or too fat are both food policed, but not in the same way and probably not at the same frequency. Being fat and choosing to get ice cream is seen as a moral failing, whilst being skinny and being told to eat a burger or family members pushing food at you feels more like it comes from an angle of patronizing concern (that you can't eat enough to save your life, you obviously need help eating more).
@@itsalwayshalloweenexceptwh5118 maybe i'm seeing things, but your language on both sides is pretty interesting. Do you mean that you'll only believe body diversity once people start wanting to be fat, orthat when fat people start being looked at with the same envy and jealousy as skinny people? if that's the case i don't understand why people have to desire to be or become fat in order for different body types to be represented in the media, and not forgetting that it's not a matter of aesthetics alone, there's a lot of health concerns surrounding obesity bigger weights. There are people out there that do try and succeed at becoming fat, and many people in Fat acceptance and HAES community (i see them mostly in tiktok) do state that they are happier when fat, and want to remain fat, and while they know they can they're choosing to not lose weight, so there's it. Also not everybody wants to be skinny, or buff for example, but those are all bodies showcased in BoDi. I could go on to more body types, but i'm keeping it at weight related stuff.0 the other side isn't roses either. Skinny people are also thought of as promiscuous, addicts, and disordered. All negative things on the moral aspect too. On the policing of food both examples can be applied to both sides, though I agree that people are more emboldened at fatshaming.
Soooooo relatable 😶 I was skinny shamed for many years and even considered getting breast implants because I wasn't "curvey enough" and men weren't going to want a "stick". It wasn't until my late 20s that my metabolism slowed down and I was able to gain weight. Then I was judged for not being toned enough.. 😑 We just have to appreciate our bodies however they are. They do SO much for us. ❤💕 Thank you for this video!
I am not even done with this video yet at the time of typing this but I am SO glad you are addressing this topic. I as a skinny girl have been on the receiving end of skinny shamming (but fortunately not nearly as much as I have heard others go through). While fat shamming is a huge problem and I really want these people to be treated fairly - we can't completely ignore skinny shamming either. Yes there is skinny privilege but that doesn't mean that skinny people don't get bullied for their body type. The societal beauty standards are narrow in image - most people won't fit this image including the skinny people. We are expected to still have curves and c cup breasts with a round and noticeable behind... We need to realize that we all go through hardships and the best way to make changes and grow is to bond together as one.
why is REAL women plus sized , are skinny women not real to yall body shamming is body shamming there is no in between at the end of the day period .Love this video!!!!
I noticed “skinny shaming” it hits a certain way for East Asians/Japanese folk. I’m an adult Asian female. I used to be kinda chubby throughout most of my childhood and spent a lot of time wearing slightly loose clothes between middle school and high school. I didn’t like exercise and while I did eat healthy foods (thanks to my Japanese mom making healthy traditional meals), I still craved sweets & chips. I went through a phase of gaining way too much weight and no one ever commented about my weight, especially non-Asian people. Most people think I’m “normal” or “average” when I’m 20-40 lbs overweight. Also since I become even more apple shaped when I gain weight (basically skinny arms & ankles, but rounded stomach), I’m more likely to be told I’m not a “real fat person” when I have clothes on. People either scrutinize or celebrate (fetishize) my body type because I’m “not like one of those skinny Asian b***es” (which I overheard once and thought it was extremely rude). Having to hear that makes me want to work out and eat healthy to spite those people. I’ve had health scares in the past including high blood pressure, high cholesterol, pre-diabetes, and had to get surgery to remove a diseased gallbladder. I don’t want people yelling “yah gurl eat that cake/steak!” when I’m legitimately trying not to die early or get a limb amputated.
when I was the “chubby kid” I was fat shamed by my peers and my family. At the age of 16 I decided to start doing sports and eat healthy (whatever it meant at that time). After 2 years, when I’ve lost a lot of weight, I experienced waaay worse body shaming, especially from older people. it truly hurt me, sometimes I went home crying after meeting those people: they always told me that I look like a worm (like wtf), I have lost my “beauty and charm”/my boobs, I look way worse now, they bet that I do not eat normally etc… At that time I was 48 kg and 163 cm and I ran a lot (I still do cause I love it, although I have gained some weight since). As someone who personally experienced way more hurtful skinny shaming (my aquantances still remember and talk about “the ugly and skinny me”), it feels so wrong to know that people think skinny shaming is not that bad/a flex/etc. I am against every type of body shaming and am glad to see You made a video on this topic!
I have had almost exactly similar experience.....it really does mess you up inside....I hope you always keep loving yourself because that is what you deserve love.
Same thing happened to me, my family (who are all obese or overweight btw) talk shit on my body way more than they ever did when I was fat, they have more problems with me eating two good sized meals a day (I don’t eat lunch bc eating makes me tired and I don’t like being tired in the middle of the day lol) than when I ate 3 plates of food for every meal plus loads of snacks throughout they say, I was eating till I was so sick I couldn’t move.
@@EmilyKinny I know, I just... eh, as someone whose body lets them down a lot, this way of thinking doesn't work for me and the way it's worded is almost always centred on abled people. I just like a more really neutral way of thinking, like just, accepting your body exists and doesn't need to meet any standards of look OR performance. Yk, how it's meant doesn't always matter, there's also how it's read. Especially by the people most affected.
@@vivi-ws9yl I've seen contradicting statements about this and honestly cannot figure out where it started... Anyway, I think it's great that fat people have a movement, it's absolutely needed. But there seems to be lacking intersectionality in most mainstream body positivity and that sucks...
That's one of the reasons I didn't want to get on board, my dad was disabled and it automatically made me think of him, and how unfair that would be. I'm also trans and have a very complicated relationship with my body. Having body neutrality sounds good on paper, but I can't just choose to not hate parts of it. Plus, once I do feel comfortable in my own skin, I want to feel positive about that, not just neutral.
I'm happy this topic was talked about. As a not-so-skinny girl and as someone who doesn't support the body positivity movement anymore (body neutrality all the way baby!), the thin side of body positivity is often looked over. It's BODY shaming for a reason y'all! As long as you have a body, whether it's thick or thin, people are going to judge you for it because 1) they are assholes and 2) they don't have anything going on for themselves. Even though I'm not a big fan of the body positivity movement like I used to, I appreciate people like Clara Dao for standing up for thin women and to be proud of her body.
I remember some "friends" & "relatives" even asking me 'why do u workout ,you have no weight to lose' like wth I don't workout just to lose weight .. every body type should be equally respected.let's wish for that
i love the way zoe makes her videos omg! they’re always so well researched and informational. it’s fun to watch, but you’re always learning something new (obviously with the interruption of the la sirens) but i just appreciate how much effort she puts into her videos ❤
same thing for me I've experienced both types of body shaming and i must say that neither is less hurtful than the other- people really need to acknowledge that,, they made and still Today make me feel just as uncomfortable as I've always been when someone comments on my appearance in that manner. i have amazing days when i feel super confident in my body, but very often i wanna crawl out of my own skin. learning how to appreciate my body either way, give it a try
Thank you for this!! As a woman with very little curves and a straight, naturally, thin figure, I have been told so many times to "eat a burger". Also been acused of not eating enough. I eat a lot! I have felt like I am not a woman due to that lack of curves. I also joke (secretly cry inside) that I look like a 12 year old boy. Then when the "real woman have curves" movement arrived, that idea was just validated. I am learning to embrace the figure I have now, but it has been hard.
@@annie1284 its more about lack of curves , a straight figure. It is something I have heard growing up , not my own phrase. I don't identify that way anymore. I finally feel feminine.
@@annie1284 valid points for sure! I did have a natural childbirth though. I hadn't considered the possibility that I was too small or not curvy enough to give birth. Never crossed my mind.
She managed to inverse the stupid “fat people can’t be anorexic” argument. I wonder what size she thinks you stop being anorexic at once you lose enough weight? Like, are you anorexic until you hit size 4 and then you’re cured?
I hate when people claim “skinny shaming does not exist” it angers me so much I have been fat, skinny fat, and skinny and no matter what body shape or type I am in the end there are still people who shame me like “oh you’ve gotten skinny eat more” or “you should go on a diet your getting bigger” When I say “body positive” I don’t only mean plus size people I mean all body types and that’s how it should be… being body positive means to be positive about ur body.
My philosophy professor says " in person , everything needs to be beautiful. Soul and body ". But, it seems that our society cares only about the body and not the state of the soul. People go crazy with their body image. U are what you are , u can try to be lighter or heavier , but body image is an obsession in this crazy society.
I have been both on the heavier and the lighter side but weirdly enough, I never felt like I was skinny-shamed as much as I was fat-shamed until I watched this video. Looking back, many of the passing comments people said about my body when I lost weight, I took as a compliment when in reality, they weren't. Some reflections were made due to this video. Thank you, Zoe! For all the things that you do 🤍✨
As someone who’s been both ‘over’ and ‘under’ weight, I just want to say it’s best to find peace within. And while that’s easier said than done, it is the only stable solution because educating society will take a hell of a lot longer. Love and light for u all 💕
The fact that as a child my overweight friends & their moms were allowed to tell me I was skin & bones or needed to eat a burger and nobody batted an eyelash but if I dare called their daughters fat I was labeled as a mean girl speaks volumes about the real problem with body positivity. Skinny or conventionally attractive girls are taught from a young age to almost completely identify with their bodies/ looks while fat girls are taught to grow different aspects of their personalities and that looks aren’t everything. It was way more common for people to bully the skinny girl with no boobs in school than the fat girls (there were way more fat girls anyways so who is really marginalized)
Being skinny and always supporting your friends who have body issues while they constantly shame you is one of the most annoying things to experience lmao
I had a friend in middle school/early high school that was absolutely relentlessly bullied for being too skinny. All the comments you mentioned, you’re anorexic, eat a burger, you’re flat, etc. it was exhausting for me to defend her, I can only imagine how exhausting it was for her to go through
yeah people think being "skinny" is a good thing but not always, it's not always a compliment . they don't understand, we get so many people saying "eat more", "your arms are so skinny", "stick legs". yeah i totally agree with this video and we need more people to understand this topic.
I have gotten those exact comments so many times from my mother throughout my life. Like I am not even underweight or anything, I just have a naturally thin and petite figure. I can't even "eat more" because I get sick from overeating.
my personal experience with skinny shaming hasn't really been about my body's appearance but rather everybody assuming i had an ED and concern trolling. it got really old after a while.
I used to be very thin, I weighted 45kgs (and even less) at 1,65. People used to make fun of me at every ocasion, that i am just skin and bones, no breasts no bottom. Now I gained some weight and I stand at 63, and gathered a little belly. Everybody I know point it out to me... Like you can't never win with people..seriously. They will always find something to comment about your appearance.
love this so much. i have been shamed for being super thin and flat by so many people especially my parents to the point they'd force me to eat till i got nauseous and I'd be at the dinner table for hours just trying to finish everything. Throughout high school my body image got so bad that I'd constantly be talking about wanting a boob job and a BBL and I'd eat excessive junk food just so i could gain some weight and make the shaming stop. Also i loved what u said about fat and skinny shaming not being a competition, somehow people always bring that up and say that my experience doesn't matter or isn't as 'bad'
Why would someone comment on someone's body in a negative way,I never understood. I was skinny shamed all the time growing up and I remember back in school I didn't even want to wear skirts and shorts cause I was ashamed of how skinny my legs were. There are so many more interesting things that someone can talk about instead of commenting on your body or asking how much you weight. I don't care if someone comments on my body anymore, it's their issue not mine. Well said Zoe 👏
"both hurt" exactly As someone who has been almost 100 kg and then experienced an ED, let me tell u fat shaming and skinny shaming, are body shaming and that shit hurts af Ppl should just stop comenting on other ppl bodies
Not only is it just as bad as fat shaming, but people with EDs thrive off of skinny shaming. It validates that what they’re doing is “working”. It’s a sad, vicious cycle ):
@@thecatsays4666 I should have specified and said restrictive eating disorders accompanied by body dysmorphia. There are all sorts of eating disorders including OSFED, pica, orthorexia, diabulima, and even muscle dysmorphia. I recognize that not all eating disorders coincide with the pursuit of thinness. My comment was more from personal experience rather than a generalization of all eating disorders.
I’ve been skinny shamed my whole tween years and still a little more at teenage years. I’ll never forget those group of boys laughing at my face and saying “YOU are going to the gym?” “Lol, careful not to break yourself” “she’ll never get thick, she’s a stick” “honestly, you’re wasting your time”. It was a conversation between MY FRIENDS AND ME about how happy I was feeling over my progress, I was finally getting stronger and changing to heavier weights. Gosh, I tried to ignore the comments, I really did. But all I could do at the time was cry. And then the teacher came to try and talk to them (I was even more embarrassed when she did that) and they so cowardly denied everything, saying I misheard them and I was being dramatic… so yeah, skinny shaming exists too.
i love how zoe always talks about things that really need to be talked about. i, myself never really put on weight until i was about 14 and was always told how nice and skinny i look. now because i kind of feel as if my worth is based on this "being skinny" i kind of developed an ed. and online people are like "how can you have body dysmorphia if you're already thin" and the thing is i just don't feel well in my body. i know i'm skinny and i also don't really want to put on too much weight but i feel like nowadays people kind of don't take it serious if someone skinny says they don't feel well in their body.
Hey Zoe! I just wanted to thank you so much for discussing these types of topics because I feel like it’s really helped me and so many other people feel more comfortable and confident in our bodies. You’ve literally changed my mindset completely about how I shouldn’t feel pressured to fit into the unrealistic expectations of what an attractive woman should look like. I’m busy learning and exploring body neutrality, while going at my own pace, and have never felt more comfortable and confident with myself. You truly are an inspiration, you’re doing great sweety💛
fr, am underweight and bigger ppl told me i don't deserve body positivity because i "fit into the norm and therefore don't get bullied" like wtf sorry i have a fast metabolism
I grew up with body shaming, and fat shaming specifically. I was the child with “baby fat” or the “chubby kid” and it hurt because I was always made to feel ugly for everything from my curves to my hair to my skin tone. It was difficult, but I don’t hate myself now and I feel like I have a moderately healthy relationship with food. I love the idea of body neutrality though. I’ve never heard the term before but I think that’s what I began doing. I allow myself to criticize my body on some days, if I know I haven’t taken proper care of it and it’s starting to show, and I praise myself a lot, especially when I find an outfit that is absolutely beautiful on my body. I also agree that skinny shaming exists, I’ve seen it and I know it hurts. I feel bad that people don’t like to acknowledge it because they’re focused on fat shaming and the messed up medical system and not the mental health that comes with any type of body shaming. All bodies should be accepted and respected.
Yesss, a great fitness youtuber Natacha Oceane said "how I look is the least interesting thing about me" and it was a game changer. Her whole mindset is that fitness is something to improve your body's performance with and to push the limits of what it can do (be it lifting weights or not feeling out of breath when u walk up the stairs), not once does she mention taking care of your body to look a certain way. Her channel really changed alot for me and I feel so much more confident and inspired because of her
I got so many accusations of eating disorders when I was younger, like an absurd amount considering I was thiccc butt and muscular from dancing and ate mountains of spaghetti and ice cream. It wasn’t even like i was a size 0, I was a medium in like everything and still told I was too thin.
i am so happy to see you talk about this finally! i think it's so important to talk about it. Shaming is shaming, i don't understand how people can say (e.g.) telling a fat person to eat a salad is worse than telling a skinny person to eat a burger. you hurt people with your words either way, this is not about body standards. this is about shaming others for how they look. who cares if someone wants to be skinny? this ! is ! not ! about ! body ! standards ! it's body shaming and bullying and it can seriously have an impact on how a person views themselves. body shaming hurts, no matter what way it goes.
heroin-chic (which was the skinny standard in modeling and basically every romcom of the 90s and 2000s) is such a specific look-very thin, but also with a defined waist, broad hips and really long legs. it’s never been about thinness, it’s always been about genetics. smh.
These people can relax. If you’re not happy with your body mentally, it doesn’t matter what size you are. You won’t be happy. People hate that others can have the same struggles in different aspects. We all need to lift each other even if you wish you had what someone else hates.
Can we just take a moment to appreciate Zoe about taking such an important topic that not many people talks about with such positivity. Since I was only 10 people started commenting about how skinny I am, how fast can I loss and gain fat, even my dad told me Im too skinny and my mom asked him if he would say it if I was fat. That video like all the others, wonderful and I am glad I watched it💗 Keep going your the best❣️
As someone who used to be incredibly skinny and now is teetering on the edge of being overweight: skinny shaming is real. I developed an ED in 8th grade when being bullied because I had no ass. I’ve found it now that people don’t fat shame me as much because I think people have more reservations when it comes to fat shaming vs skinny shaming.
Thank you so much for discussing this topic 😘I have been constantly criticized for being skinny and no one really understood my problems 🥺people should accept the fact that skinny shaming is as toxic as fat shaming
I blame skinny shaming for the reason I look the way I do now. I lost weight and loved how I looked but everyone around me, including family, just skinny shamed me to the point that I gained it all back on purpose. I am 5 2" and got down to 130 from 160. It was the one time in my life that I felt confident in myself. Yet everyone kept telling me that I looked better before, and an after entire year of maintaining my weight loss but being shamed, I decided to just binge and gain it all back. I have been trying to lose the weight again since then but just can't stick to anything. This Summer it will be two years since I gained it all back and the Summer before that was when I lost it. I wish I didn't listen to other people but when someone is hearing that they look bad all day, everyday from multiple people it's hard not to listen. I was a size 8 in jeans, how is that too skinny? ☹️
I’m sorry to hear that. I think people see fat shaming as more toxic because it affects multiple aspects of their lives, like their ability to get a job or health care. Sometimes “fat” people who as medical issues like cancer are turned away because some professionals refuse to overlook their weight and focus on the issue at hand. However, I believe the world is in need of neutrality. Your body should not set the mark of how you are to be treated or respected, and I hope things turn around for you and that you’ll be surrounded by people who appreciate you for you and not your body ❤
I’ve been skinny shamed my whole childhood and teenage years. Today, I’m a young adult with no confidence or whatsoever. Thank you society for making me feel bad in a world where my opinion doesn’t matter :)
im so happy finally someone talk abt this, ive been referenced to a twig, pencil and other thin items heck even point to be bullied on grade 4 causing me to be ashamed on my body and the fact how hard it is to gain weight even when u eat pounds of food
i mean agree to disagree but I don’t like the fact that you’re saying you’ve “experienced both sides of the spectrum” when you’ve never been obese or drastically overweight. I understand that skinny shaming is a problem but i just don’t think it compares to the constant struggles of living your life obese.
Lets work on not trying to invalidate anyones feelings and emotions surrounding themselves. I understand your frustration, the approach maybe not the best. I wish you the best with loving your body.
I was skinny shamed many times but I was afraid to talk about it because it sounded like I was flexing that I'm skinny but this tipe of videos make me fell much better
Hoping to normalize having these uncomfortable discussions🤍 Connect with me on IG to join my growth journey instagram.com/zoeunlimited/
Zoe, I have been critiqued so much. I never feel comfortable with people's perceptions of what I eat and how much I weigh. But you are always happy with me. Thank you for all these videos. You are the only person on UA-cam who really understands this.
Since I was a kid I am skinny
Like I am 19 years old and 40kgs, I am not too skinny though
But according to Indian beauty standards I am way too skinny
But still I have a curvy body
My mom and everyone like every single person in my life tell me to eat more.
In my house I am literally forced to eat more and sometimes because of this I got sick too...
But people are always like having a slim body is privilege and when we say "I want to gain some weight" or something like that we are criticizing the plus size people
Like seriously?.....🙄
Origato Zoe. I enjoy all your videos. I love how you inspire & motivate people. I'll like you to know that I admire you & your personality. This is why I look up to you, as my new role model💜💜💜
Hi Zoe!!! I just wanted to share my experience in the means of food, as a currently plus-sized 17 yr old.
I used to be afraid of eating things like salads, fruit bowls, or anything that could be classified as "diet food" in public, because I didn't want to be perceived that certain way.
When you mentioned not eating certain foods because you didn't want to be stereotyped, I really connected with that.
I've made the decision to take care of my body, regardless of stereotypes
It’s all about health, if you exercise the recommended amount and eat the healthiest foods you possibly can and you happen to be thin or thick then who cares? You’ll feel amazing because you’re healthy and that’s all that matters
I never understood why people feel the need to comment on other people’s bodies. No matter if positive or negative, no matter what size. It’s literally no one’s business.
Say it loud for the ppl in the back!
Exactly you just have to mind your own business ,if you have a problem with yourself you should find help but dragging other people won’t make you feel better it will only make it worse
So true
If it is on the internet it is everybody's business
Yesss ikr
Back when I was "skinny", my mom used to tell me that a real woman has curves and that men wouldn't like my body. Also my sister told me I looked like a starving child from a third world country... I am not sure if that was body shaming, but it hurt and made me self-conscious about my appearance.
That is body shaming, and that is really cold of them to say those things. Wonder what they’re thinking in their heads when they said those hurtful things to you. They probably should’ve apologized on the spot, especially if they saw you hurt.
“Everyone wants to be loved. But the one person everyone wants to be loved by the most is not their mother, their father, friends, or partner. It is the person staring back at them in the mirror.”
That is body shaming. Hope u healed from those nasty comments.
Uh, that was body shaming. 😶
Well the most beautiful models came from the third world countries
can we just appreciate how zoe talks about a LOT of controversial topics, whether popular or unpopular? all are equally important to know and discuss. 💗
Yea! Love her opinions and insights (and even facts that might be controversial to some)
I appreciate her 💖💖
Why did I get a ad about loosing weight in the middle of the video ?
@@supremelordof_fangirling she cant control ads
I really don’t like when people say “finally, REAL women are shown”. Are skinny women not real? Why should real only mean fat?
How is fat shaming not okay but skinny shaming okay? Body shaming is body shaming, regardless of size. And none of it is okay.
Yeah that makes me so mad. I hate how so many people (men particularly say this kind of crap) think a woman’s body is what makes her. Society is crazy.
ikr. it’s ironic how people who claim to be body positive can be so aggressively intolerant of fit or skinny bodies.
Yes you are right but just to add an insight I think by « real » maybe it is meant to be or should be the more common¿ at least from what I can tell from the people around me the common look of women aren’t either very skinny or very big but just in between which, at least for me, can be closest to real of that makes sense
@@FirstLast-ox1vj Yeah but then they should just use the word common because using the word real completely changes the meaning
My college best friend thought that I was a dysphoric homosexual woman for simply being skinny and lacking curves! I have no issues with getting called lesbian, but she actually thought that I was going to be a pervert to her. I also had a friend telling me that "it's alright, skinny people don't have them." like seriously? They think skinny people actually have no curves at all.
As a skinny black girl, in an African home, having lived all my life in an African country where the beauty standard is curvy I can relate to this title on a spiritual level...
My life is a series of backhanded compliments and outright body shaming from friends, family and complete strangers.
If I had a dollar for every time I heard "do you even eat?" "You really should eat" "take better care of yourself" and the almighty"y'know no man will ever want you"
I'd own a house in the Bahamas lol
I’m sorry! That should NEVER happen, but unfortunately, it does. I hope that it does stop, and that you never take the words to heart because you’re fine, just do what makes yourself happy
Same here !
from what ive heard the Bahamas is the same way... its not a vacation island.....
collarbones are like a beautiful natural necklace! if u want boobage i’ll share some of my 30Fs with u
Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your experience, as I come from a very caucasian tiny, isolated farm town and I never thought about the intersectionality of race and skinny-shaming.
Skinny shaming does exist and it's even more prevalent in people of color. Latinas and African women are shamed for being too skinny or don't have large enough curves. I grew up being shamed my siblings grew up being shamed for being "fat". You can't please anyone. I've had thicker friends who were ashamed of their bodies and I would always tell them they were beautiful. These same people started shaming me for being too skinny....the irony
as a latina, im told that im not a real latina because of my lack of curves like what ??😭 where im from being skinny means you have no money and are from a “bad” area so id have relatives telling me to eat like a pig💀
same with indian women. im told my body doesn't suit my own ancestral and traditional attires because i lack the fat and curves (even though my ancestors look like this too). "too masculine" cause healthy with some muscle definition.
Same here! It was the same people I uplifted who threw me under the bus when it was convenient for them!
Edit: I was very confused my why people were mad at the use of the word ghettos, because where I live its a place. But I guess not all black communities causally say that word the same way not all black people say the n word 😅
@@methzuckerberg7592 as a Brazilian, I completely agree with what you said, I would go as far as saying that being skinny were I live is a bit worse than being overweight, they have this mentality of "If you are overweight, you have money enough to maintain that type of body" sooooo in the end, skinny people are associated with poverty, it sucks, I got made fun of during middle school and it still going
when I hear people claim "skinny shaming doesn't exist" I think back about how my younger sister was literally bullied for being too skinny, while I was bullied for being fat. Yeah, skinny and fat shaming are two different things, but they hurt all the same! She grew up thinking she wanted to have "curves" like me, I grew up thinking I wanted to be skinny like her. The fact that we both borrowed the same sweater from my mom, and we BOTH thought it looked better on the other really opened my eyes
they do not all hurt the same 😭 i’ve been a size 0 and under my entire life and being called “bone thug” will never hurt as bad as being told “loose weight you look like a whale”
@@nyaxj7149 I recognize that my experience doesn't apply to everyone! I think the fact is that in this society being thin (even dangerously so) it's seen as valuable, so subconsciously it might hurt more to be called fat. What I meant, if I could put it better, is that both types of bullying and abuse are horrible and hurt people's self esteem (to varying degrees, depends on the person). Anyway I'm sorry that you have been made to feel too much and not enough. You are valuable and I hope you have a wonderful day
@@nyaxj7149 stop trying to make it a competition by saying which one hurts more. What matters is both hurt. And you've not been on the other side so you don't know how it feels to be fat-shamed.
Stop trying to say that being bullied for being skinny hurts More than being bullied for being fat. Both are equally degrading.
@@leah_r3713 They did not say that?
I lost 80 lbs, had been overweight and shamed for that all my life. When losing weight, there was not a day people weren't commenting on my body. When I reached my goals, then people began to complain I lost too much weight. You can't win 🤷
ding ding ding. you can never win lol. this was exactly my experience too
Seriously!! Why does your body matter so much to them? We are all on our own life journey, as well as health journey. Vanity is such a huge aspect when it comes to our bodies, and it’s disgusting.
My body is not attached to my character. And it is of no concern to anyone else, friends, family, even SO. My body, my choices :)
Which is why you should not gaf about what people say!
Same
So true!! This happened to me! Was very skinny my whole life. .got mocked endlessly by the "perfect body females",. . Then I had a hysterectomy years later that messed up my hormones and I gained 25lbs on my 5"2 thin frame and looked quite chubby and got mocked by "friends and family",.. I've lost almost all the weight in a need to get healthy due to poor blood work, and now I'm constantly told by heavy women how skinny I am ( as if I didn't know that myself), I've often wondered, " I wonder what your reaction would be if I told you frequently, how heavy you are, how you would feel?" But, I'm just not that kind of person. Unlike those around me, I don't focus on my friends weight. Isn't it about the person they are? I go way out of my way to compliment ladies everywhere, just to remind them of their beauty. We need to support each other against this trend where women side against each other!!
Also, we need more medium body representation! Now brands have "plus sized models" but they are always placed next to the traditional, super thin model. They reenforce negative mentalities when placed next to each other, without any recognition that there is a wide range of bodies in between!
THIS!!! Like I want to see clothes on a body like mine, they only ever show 2 ends of the spectrum
Right? I don't even know what I am half the time. I am someone who has a naturally big butt and boobs but bcoz I don't have a flat stomach or toned arms or legs I am called plus size, but when I search what plus size is, I see NONE of those representations look like me. And it really pissed me off to the point where I start crying 😂bcoz it makes me think my body isn't normal and there's something wrong with me
@@yourmumschesthair4009 If it makes you feel better, by what you described it seems you have a pretty normal body (I mean all bodies are normal of course). From my experience, most people are more in-between
They should show short girls too. Even the plus sized models are tall as fuck. Meanwhile the majority of women I know are like 5’1”-5’6”
You mean sizes? I'm sure clothes range from xs to xl or even xxl, xxxl etc. Just buy the size that is yours. The models are only there so you can tell what the clothes actually look like and how is it worn. Or to give you styling ideas.
"If you're skinny, you don't have body dysmorphia" I just lost braincells.
ikr, gatekeeping mental illnesses is a new low
thats literally so skinny phobic.
I remember being called a “size zero whore” in middle school by someone in high school. I think about it from time to time. I hope that person is okay.
I hope *you* are okay! 🥰
hope someone will call myself like that, one fucking day.
I’m sorry that was said to you. Not acceptable at all :/
@@lu5681 oh u wanna be harassed? Tf
@@lu5681 why though?
Yea, the beauty standard isn’t being skinny, it is being skinny but having huge boobs, butt and hips. This is just nearly unachievable. I have small boobs, but I’m fortunately never body shamed
No that’s not the standard it’s a trend, it’ll be over and being skinny will still reign.
@@phucbich7581 Actually yes, the western beauty standards is to have wide hips yet a thigh gap, big boobs and ass which is really sad because it's actually kind of hard to achieve naturally.
I had people tell me that I must be a man and no one will want to date or marry me because of my small boobs.
@@phucbich7581 isn’t that the same thing?
@@elcb845 do skinny people really get bashed on? Unless you are actually underweight, then people make fun of you for looking unhealthy which isn't ok. But regular slim people aren't body shamed
As a skinny black/African girl, I relate to this title on a spiritual level. People/parents never keep quiet about my body, collar bones, arms etc
Plus, there’s a general lack of empathy for skinny shaming that a lot of people have.
I relate to you so much. As a skinny black/African girl with serious body dysmorphia, I've always felt so alone. I've been told that I shouldn't critique the way I look because I fit the "beauty standard" and yet I'm told that I don't have enough "meat on my bones" and that I'm flat. I'm constantly skinny shamed by everyone around me and it affects me both physically and mentally. People have no care in the world about the way I feel because at the end of the day skinny is the "beauty standard". NO IT'S NOT. Slim-thick is the beauty standard. I don't have curves, I don't have thick thighs, I don't have an ass, I don't even have boobs. I'm completely flat. I force myself to eat more food in hopes that I gain weight but nothing is working so I'm trying to accept the way I am. its really hard but I am trying! I hope by sharing this you don't feel alone
@@bellelukeman9294 I feel you girl!
Same for me! As an African girl, the beauty standards around here is being thick or slim thick. I am skinny and I get bodyshamed for being flat and not curvy as a "real woman" should be. It really sucks. I cant wear certain outfits, afraid to appear extremely flat and it gives me social anxiety as well as body dysmorphia.
@@michellewoode3402 Girl!!...this is me🤧😭😭
I’m Latina and African but I’m pretty skinny. I hate it so much bc not only do both cultures skinny shame, they also say whatever is on their minds. Like no filter.
I always hear something among the lines of “how does it feel to go shopping and always finding things that fit you?” Like idk… nothing really fits me, I have to fix pretty much every single item I buy.
Yeah they are putt my waaaay too much stock in the fashion industry to make clothing that fits anyone. I’m skinny, I still have to dedicate a day to finding a pair of jeans that fit because fashion can’t agree on what sizes mean.
I think it is kind of encouraged in the body positivity community to see skinny girls as the enemy. As the mean girl that needs to be taken down a peg.
Spot on 👏
Yep!
No I don’t agree with you
The mentality is literally this: out of everyone skinny girls have the least to be insecure about. Which is fucked up but also kinda true. But I don't think that should invalidate the problems and insecurities skinny ppl face daily.
@@lunastarwater9856 why?
This topic really needed to be discussed. I'm tired of being compared to a twig or a broomstick or a pencil , even by my parents . People skinny shame others without even realising it
You're so right
Right?? But when we call them fat, they lose their shittt
my mom doesn't even allow me by some clothes by saying "it won't fit you well, you're like a skeleton it's gonna look bad on you"
I’m called chopstick 🙃 even before the whole Kim k body type craze. In 2005, I was in first grade and going through elementary during the early 2000s…I was STILL skinny shamed. When that was THEE look of the time. I’m starting to think it’ll never go away, for either skinny or fat people. We just need to preach kindness, I suppose :/
It gets so toxic so fast. My mom, as much as I love her, practically pitted my sisters and I against each other because my mom was plus size and I was more curvy, but my sisters were naturally underweight (to where it raised health concerns). She'd make comments a lot when we were growing up because I was "more like her" and my sisters were "sticks". 1. I felt fat and got scared by the comments and 2. My sisters felt so unfeminine and ashamed due to the comments. Its just all around bad to make the comments. Just give compliments where you mean them and show concern when it's a health matter and otherwise just love and let live
The whole fat vs. skinny shaming situation is that the same people that say "everyone's feelings are valid" get upset when people that they feel are "privileged" try to express their feelings. Having the ideal body type does not magically cure mental health or EDs. It sucks that in order to elevate one group of people we seem to be degrading another.
This is so true. I wonder what the psychological term is for people who get work done and say they are confident. Is it a placebo effect that only last for a bit or does it actually provide long lasting emotional well-being.
I kinda feel that way about people who are conventionally attractive when they try to discuss their experiences with “pretty privilege”. When some say that they necessarily don’t mind the privilege, it really sucks to see someone else immediately try to shame them for not completely being uncomfortable with how they look
because only one body type are victim to regular medical malpractice and are systemically discriminated against and its not skinny people. hope that helps
@@jazzyfacts this is wrong and right tho. Too skinny are also a health risk for some people. However, there are some people who are naturally skinny and fat due to metabolism and other factors their DNA gave them. And they are just a healthy as the other according to Dr. So, people should just do whatever is heathy for them.
@@andromedamessier3176 thats not what im saying though, im saying that skinny people will never be refused medical attention for being too skinny while fat people are extremely frequently denied medical care because their pain is always attributed to their weight. bodyshaming is always bad but skinnyphobia isn't real since it's not an actual system of oppression.
GIIRRRRLLLL!! I felt this in my SOUL because you are not the only one who feels this way. We can appreciate all bodies without making anyone feel bad or less than 💜.
Exactly 💜💜
hey I think I saw u in Jaz Tyler's comment section :D
@@azukichiu no bro she is like heck everywhere she is on jaztyler on Linda sun on doobydobap and now here to is she a bot or something??
a 'friend' (hes a boy) of mine once grabbed my chest, and when i asked why he did it he said "it's not sexual harassment if there's nothing to touch". even my best friends make a comment at least once a week about my body, whether its calling my flat or commenting about my wrists. i never really had thought about me being 'flat' before, because i didn't think i was. but them showing that they saw me as flat made me a whole lot more insecure, and i changed the clothing that i wore to try and make my body seem different than it is. i've never said anything in response, because what would i even say? i didnt even realize until after watching this video that it counted as body shaming. even my dad tells me that im too skinny and i should eat more :/
How much ya'll be weighing to the point u be skinny shamed that badly, like my bmi is 17 and i have never been skinny shamed in my life
That definitely was sexual assault and you don’t deserve any of that treatment. It sounds like he said that to shock you into not retaliating. I’m so sorry.
@@onechubbydoggo9444 your experience is antidotal. There are plenty of communities that shame bodies for not being “enough” for their standards where being skinny is acceptable as long as you have big boobs and a butt
@@darkopacity o no I'm not saying it doesn't exist or that my experience is everyone else's I'm just wondering how skinny some of these ppl in the comments are to be skinny shamed relentlessly because i have lived in America, the uk, and Germany and not been skinny shamed once even though I'm really skinny
@@darkopacity thank you
I’ve been fat and really thin so I’ve been both fat shamed and skinny shamed. Neither feels good because you are being singled out for how you look. Body neutrality should be the goal. Loving our bodies for what they can do should be the goal.
I was bullied and always accused of having big lips or so called "duck lips" , but now having big lips is the beauty standard and people always accuse / claim that i have had fillers injected. First it angered me how people's opinions can change , but now i only find it funny.
(P.S : have lip fillers if u want to , don't if u don't want to but pls don't judge/make it ur business to find out abt other people's surgeries or what not . A person will tell u if they want to. Not that it matters . )
Sameeeee! The duck and the faces! When i was a teen (+ 10yrs ago) a girl asked me why I injected my lips because my bottom lip has a line in the middle.. and i was like: gurl what?!
OMG this was me! Literally this boy in my sixth grade class called me "fat lips" and now we have people getting filler LOL
OMG. I FORGOT THIS WAS A THING. The 2000's were so cruel.
I was so insecure with my lips before because i have big lips compared to my classmates, but now i love it because it suits me and i look so beautiful specially with lipstick 😭
I have bigger lips too. Ever since like the 6th grade, I’ve been told by boys/men that I have DSLs 😒 poor little 11/12 year old me finding out what that was… while I was still ATTENDING A DAYCARE like damn… (i couldn’t be trusted at home alone bc one time I tried to cook mac and cheese in a pot in the microwave and almost set the house on fire whoops)
I still think it's weird how people don't think that skinny shaming is real. YOU CAN BE SKINNY AND INSECURE since the perfect body has been "tiny waist but with big boobs and butt" years now...You need to be thin but you also need to "look feminine" for many people to think that you look healthy. It makes no sense literally nobody can win who wouldn't be insecure. Can we just leave all women alone and not judge their bodies ESPECIALLY in front of them?Why do some people feel the need to say shit like "oh you need to lose some weight" or "oh eat a burger". This is not "caring for them" this is shaming. I've literally been told "hey stop dieting" when I've never really done it lol. Naturally skinny people exist like heavier people exist. Accept it or at least mind your own business.
you honestly can never win. if you’re fat you’re fat shamed, if you skinny you’re skinny shamed and if you’re the ideal body of skinny waist and curves you get constantly sexualised and reduced down to how sexy your body is and you as a person is completely overlooked. we can never win. that’s why we should just tell people who make comments about our bodies to f*ck off and just live our lives how we want to
Skinny shaming is a thing
Fat shaming and skinny shaming are both wrong and people need to understand that
^^^ bro i only see ppl taking 1 srsly nd think the other one doesnt exist its annoying. theyre both equally as wrong
gonna be controversial and say that the backlash against skinny people in the body positivity movement is somewhat valid, but let me explain. I want to be clear that I 100% agree that no one deserves to be shamed for their bodies and skinny shaming is absolutely a thing. Nowadays people look at the body positivity movement as something that's about feeling good in your body, which is absolutely important, but that wasn't the intended revolutionary goal. The point was to combat fatphobia as a whole and not just fat shaming and there is an important distinction between those things. Fatphobia is more than just mean comments, its bias in medicine where fat people have to fight to for doctors to take their valid health concerns seriously without them being dismissed as just having to lose weight. Its the fact that the doctor's office only has chairs that are big enough to fit people of a certain size or scales that can only take people up to a certain weight leading them to need to get weighed on industrial scales instead. It's the fact that fat people are discriminated against when in comes to employment opportunities, especially in front facing positions. The body positivity movement has turned into skinny people and small fat people saying things like "buy that dress and f anyone who says something mean about it" but the fact is you can't buy that dress if they don't sell it in your size. I don't deny that skinny shaming hurts or that it can have a real effect on people, but there is a valid reason why some people are so upset that the movement has been co-opted by smaller bodies. The issue is bigger than mean comments, but mean comments are now the focus of the movement because that's the only part that skinnier people have to deal with.
@@amentrison2794 Thank you sm for saying this
@@amentrison2794 I’m sorry but skinny people absolutely do get discriminated too, in both the workplace and healthcare. My point is just that I sometimes feel that the “body positivity” movement is used as an excuse by some to target another body type and get away with it. There are countries outside the USA (you might’ve heard of some from a few comments maybe) where being “skinny” is seen as being a lot worse than being “fat.” Particularly because body fat is needed by women to have a good reproductive health. Truthfully, this is all just a double edged sword.
@@hi-ls6lt I agree that the context around being skinny is different in non-western countries, with that overlapping with developing countries. I also agree that body positivity can be used in a weaponized way. That being said, genuine question, can you provide some examples on the ways that skinny people are discriminated against in the workplace and in healthcare, outside of just negative comments (which I 100% agree are also bad)?
Why would anyone want to gatekeep having a bad body image? Anyone can have body dysmorphia or eating issues. It’s *not* limited by body size, gender, etc.
We all really need to work on supporting each other more.
Thank you. I'm tired of people saying that being skinny is easy.
There are two types of "skinny".
There is the desired and there is the "true skinny" .
When you are skinny with an ectomorph body shape, people WILL bodyshame you, call you a 'twig' , etc..
You will try to gain weight, but with a fast metabolism, that will be very hard!
I'm not saying that we have more problems than overweight women (specially because being skinny is more socially accepted than being fat).
I'm saying we too have struggles
how do ectomorphs gain muscle mass? if they can’t maintain body fat very well do they typically run out of energy?
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans I just eat sweets and sugar everyday lol.
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans not run out of energy but kind of hard to gain resistance, you can gain muscle mass but without protein pills or shakes to help with that, the change won't be too dramatic
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans It’s hard for us to gain muscle mass as well. Gaining any form of weight for an ectomorph is a task.
unless ur asain it is a plus
Body neutrality is so important. As someone who has struggled with several types of EDs, a big step in recovery has been to internalize the mentality of "even if i hate my body right now, it still deserves to be taken care of properly"
i hope your doing well :)
Same for me! As an African girl, the beauty standards around here is being thick or slim thick. I am skinny and I get bodyshamed for being flat and not curvy as a "real woman" should be. It really sucks. I cant wear certain outfits, afraid to appear extremely flat and it gives me social anxiety as well as body dysmorphia.
You realize being skinny /= not having curves right?? You can be skinny and have curves, and you can be fat and have nothing that's sexually attractive. We're talking about FAT as in HUUGE people not thick or curvy people.
@@glistening7178 I think you lost the memo here. The main subject here is about skinny shaming not fat people. But of course, for context, other sizes are being mentioned. Also, in the black community, it does not matter if you're skinny but have an hourglass figure, you're still seen as someone that needs to gain weight. This person is sharing her experience and it feels like you're trying to invalidate them. Umm and you do realize that thick and curvy people get fat shamed as well right? How did you end up with this video and conversation being about huge people?💀
@MegLow she wasn’t extremely skinny, she had a little fat, and that okay.
You should read Fledgling by Octavia Butler! The lead woman character, Shori, is small, petite, and dark skinned and is seen as being incredibly pretty and sexy
Girl i feel you, i experienced that when i visited my family members from coast and they all kept discussing how skinny i was, i was forced to eat more than i can handle and one old lady had the audacity to tell me i cannot get married with that kinda skinny body😭 i cried
I don't care if you're thin, athletic, midsize, or fat. Everyone has the right to love their bodies. People need to stop focusing on gatekeeping other people's bodies, and should worry about themselves instead.
When I was 12yo, a girl mocked me just because I was skinnier than her. She said my clothes are wearing me and I looked ugly 🫠 When I gained weight during uni days, a boy was calling me fat and making me feel bad every time I eat more than what he assumes the portion size a girl would eat. When I got more muscular, people tell me my arms are getting to big for a girl.
Everyone’s gonna have something to say all the time, no matter how much you change your body. And I believe it all stems from their own insecurities. So, the most important thing isn’t to become the body you think people want, but to be strong and feel good and healthy in your body.
well said- !
They are jealous at this point
The fact that being skinny isnt enough, you also need boobs and an ass your back cant support 🤷🏻♀️. I've been naturally skinny my whole life and i was either teased growing up or not fitting in in today's society. Pain is pain always. Skinny/fat shaming is not the same pain but they both are legit pain
Exactly the skinny girls they talk about when they say "it's the norm" still have boobs and ass
That's what really matter to people,if you're that skinny that you don't get to have "curves" you get bullied. Talking from personal experience
@@Kaworubeliever Im sure you are beautiful just the way you are.
But if you are still interested in gaining weight and getting a big butt. You can get a big butt by lifting even if it is not in your genetics to have a big butt. I would recommend for you to get into weightlifting and track your calories on myfitnesspal. If you prefer to workout at home, all you need is dumbbells in order to start lifting weights. But you can also go to the gym if you want. The healthiest way to gain weight is to lift weights and eat a healthy balanced diet. This is the healthiest way because you will build muscle and exercise which has health benefits and you will be eating a healthy balanced diet instead of eating junk food and being sedentary to try and gain weight. Plus if you lean bulk and lift weights you can look lean and toned when you gain weight. Since some of the weight will be muscle instead of solely just fat. BTW lifting weights will not make you look too bulky or manly or like a bodybuilder. It takes years for female bodybuilders to look the way they do and they have to eat a certain way to look like they do. Women who lift can look feminine and curvaceous like Yanet Garcia, Tiana Musarra, Kaurbeauty (on youtube), Amouranth (on youtube), Alicia Parr, etc. I just want to point this out there because some women do not know this.
BTW in order to get a bigger butt through exercise, you have to make sure you are taking in more calories than you burn. This is why I recommended for you to track your calories on myfitnesspal. So that you will get an idea of how much calories you are taking in. Sometimes people think they are eating more or less calories than they are actually eating. Tracking your calories can help you better get an idea of how much you are eating. Also in terms of the exercise, I will recommend for you to follow a personal trainer workout program. A lot of people do not know how to create their own program on their own. You can use bret contreras free workout program on his website or you can work with him or a different personal trainer online or in person to come up with a personalized training program for you.
If you want to find out how to gain weight by lifting weights, go to the links below:
ua-cam.com/video/UgU4DpJxfFU/v-deo.html
bretcontreras.com/how-to-design-an-optimal-glute-training-program/
honestly skinny and flat people have some great advantages
1) they can shop in the kids section
2) they can make themselves clothes and use less fabric
3) they can run faster because they don’t have useless boobage weighing them down
4) they can look fashionable by wearing super loose and drapey layered clothes
5) they could pretend to be a man in emergencies or all the time (would if i could)
those are just a couple but i’m jealous of all of the flat ppl. if i could donate my 30F balloons to someone who wants them more than me i would.
@@EmmaJohnsonShenanigans Well I guess I should only speak for myself on this. But I think it's not a compliment or a good thing to be an adult woman and have to shop in the kids section and pass off as a man to people just because you do not have curves. I'm an adult female, why would I want to look like a man or dress like a little kid?
Also just because someone is not curvy does not mean they can fit into kids clothes. For example, if someone is tall and not curvy. The kids clothes will be too short for them. Also kids style is different than adult style. So why would a grown woman curvy or not curvy want to dress like a little kid? Also the man part is especially offensive. Women are very beautiful, whether they are curvy or not. There is an obvious difference between a man and woman's face and women bodies still look different than a man even when their boobs and butts are small. So why would you think that they can pass off as a man to people?
@@compatissantelegante4477 i didn’t think of it that way i guess, that’s all on me i’m sorry. the kids clothes in my opinion would be mainly for shirts. and kid clothes can be cheaper.
and second, i guess it’s just me who’d like to be able to pass as a man sometimes then.
i thought that was a compliment, to be able to seem boyish enough to be treated as a boy would. i apologize for having said potentially harmful things :/
I just wanted to say how rude it is to hear someone telling you “are you anorexic?” even when you ARE so I can’t imagine how it is when you are not… LOVE YOU ALL
hi! i have trouble with EDs and I'm not really skinny so it's a bit of a double edged sword. love your comment :)
Whenever I said I'm not comfortable with my body I got called out for, because I have the 'perfect' hourglass shape. Like thanks, I didn't ask to be sexualised when I was a kid.
Skinny and fat shaming are bad. Body shaming, no matter your body type is bad. I wish more people understood this. Thank you for the video. It means a lot.
no bc dead ass. I have a slim thick body and yeah, I love my body and many have complimented me for it. but you know the downside? being sexualized 24/7. it's uncomfortable AF when everyone just only talks about your body as if nothing else matters about you. that's the downside of it. It's uncomfortable AF.
As someone who’s been bullied for being fat, and doesn’t know what it’s like to go through that.. I’m sorry you did and your struggles are just as valid.
Yeah ive heard even people with the "ideal" slim thick body somehow get instantly categorized as sluts. Same thing with people w big boobs being instantly sexualized even as children. Im a super thin, flat person myself and while i have experienced pretty brutal bullying for being underweight, ive never had to deal with someone calling me a whore or anything. Just goes to show you literally no matter what body type u have, seems othet people will mock or degrade u regardless so u might as well just not give af lol
@@c-mtz583 the thing is same and I used to get catcalled a lot when I was around 12-15 because I looked mature enough :’)
Errr that's different topic
Can I just say thank you…..THANK YOU!!!! I feel like I can’t even post about my body because it’ll look like I’m bragging about being skinny when all I wanna do is show off my cute outfit. I get so many comments about my weight at work (all meant as jokes) but after a while it gets to you. Thanks for making this video ❤️
do it disable the comments and post to do what makes u happy :)
@@KxmpleteKxllapse im pretty sure she said at work
I'm so happy this is finally being talked about. Born in a Hispanic household, it's always a burden hearing my mom and female relatives say that I'm too skinny/flat because that's not what men are interested in, like I have to find my validation from what people think about me. There was a comment stating that skinny shaming is more common in people of color, and that's absolutely true. Most of my family is curvy with thick thighs and chest, unlike me, which is why I tend to get targeted more from them. I recently started to ignore them and start working on myself, but the insecurities are still there.
Everyone is beautiful in their own way, and you guys are too
receive my hugs from your fellow from Africa🤗. Through your comment I can feel your pain.
I've never been skinny a day in my life, so I've only personally experienced fat shaming. However, I have seen skinny shaming too. I knew a girl in high school that was very skinny and people always shamed her for being so thin and would get called names on a daily basis by men and women alike. It hurt to see how much it affected her and she became so self conscious that she later developed an ED. I always felt bad for her and didn't understand how the same people fat shaming me could be skinny shaming her. It doesn't make any sense. I wish the world would just realize that other people's bodies aren't anyone's business
I had a dysmorphic view of my body when I was my “skinniest” when I was struggling with anorexia in high school. I’ve since recovered, but now I find myself slipping into the same shaming behaviors the girls in the opening clips were engaging in. The other day, I saw a Tik tok in which a girl who was “thin” talked about how she wanted body inclusivity to be a permanent feature of the fashion industry. I reflexively started criticizing her: how dare she make that argument when she’s not even “fat” like me! As I was ranting about this to a friend, I suddenly realized that I was being extremely hypocritical, since in so many ways I hate the claim that someone can’t speak to a particular issue because they don’t “fit in the right category”. I realized that I was simply projecting my own insecurities on her, since I am still quite insecure about my appearance. I think that is one of the root problems of the issue you speak about here. I don’t usually write comments or give my opinions on videos in which I do not know the creator, but I felt compelled to do so this time. You have given me a lot to think about.
when a fat person is complimented on their confidence, it’s so backhanded. they will be complimented on “confidence” for wearing what any thin person would wear as if saying that they are brave to wear that with the body they have. it isn’t a good thing at all
So happy you’re talking about this Zoe! Also it’s not always about how people look at you, it’s being too small to fit into certain clothes or having to buy childish bra because none of the others fit. It’s a huge confidence sink, everyone has insecurities and no one ever deserves to be told they aren’t valid.
This! Being tall and skinny things are always either too short or I was swimming in them.
Yes! Going bra shopping always makes me feel insecure and like I don’t belong bc I have super small boobs
At this point I don’t wear bras at all. I don’t need the support so what’s the point. It’s been very freeing and I feel lucky that I don’t need to wear a boob cage like my bestie who has a big bust does.
I remember being told that I look like a skeleton covered in skin, being constantly told that I need to eat more, and to please put on some weight. I have heard the "real women have curves" shit so many times that I would probably be rich by now if they had given me a dollar for each time someone said it to me. Once, while I was in high school, I was at a mall checking some clothes and a girl approached me and asked if I used the toothbrush to help myself vomit... And I wasn't even that skinny. It is painful to have people assume that you have an ED, because it means you look sick, which is in no way a beauty standard anywhere.
I was voted one of the ugliest girls in my class when I was 15, and I was one of the skinniest ones. Being skinny does not grant you being beautiful or being popular, if anything, it only enables other people to talk shit about your body without feeling guilty or ashamed like they do when they talk about larger body types. None of my friends who are overweight have ever been told to their faces that they need to lose weight, yet I have been told several times that I should gain some weight... Double standards anyone?
I am not saying that skinny people have it harder than fat people, I know we don't, but it is painful because I would never diminish or deny other people's struggles with how society perceives them or discriminate against them, and yet many of those people who have been discriminated for their weight and know what it feels like think that skinny shaming is not a real thing or a problem at all.
I have gastroparesis, I have been on both sides of the scale and people always have something to say. Skinny shaming is just as damaging, especially when health issues are to blame. Countless women in my chronic illness groups feel traumatized by just trying to exist in a sick body and people commenting on their weight.
The bopo movement also tells me I'm not allowed to be body positive because I am not fat enough even though I have a marginalized body as a disabled person.
@@hopehughes2423 I also have a digestive disorder that caused me to loose 150lbs in 10 months. It’s heartbreaking when being skinny/underweight comes from a digestive disease.
@@hrianna5211 I'm sorry you have to deal with stomach problems too. I hope you find relief from your struggles.
@@hopehughes2423 Thank you! I’m sorry you had to experience skinny shaming too. I hope your gastroparesis gets better🙏 I actually went from 300lbs and I’m down to 150lbs maybe even less😖😖but I’m tall so I look deathly skinny even though I eat but my digestive disease/disorder makes me look ill. How do you deal with your gastroparesis? It’s a paralyzed stomach right?☹️😔
@@hrianna5211 we get to be skinny queens RAHHH
I'm a skinny girl with vitiligo, ive gotten so many "anorexic cow" comments when i was younger i forced myself to eat a lot of caloric foods, who made me throw up at the end of the day. As i got older and found good friends, i started to Invest more in what my body can do, than what it can look like, and decided to work out and gain strenght, which helped me out a lot, both mentally and physically. I still have a weird relationship with food, but Im working on improving it more and more everyday.
@@love.coolkid1337 thank you, that means a lot :')
vitiligo is like magnified freckles. *so cute!*
stop using vitiligo for attention, your pfp clearly doesn’t show a girl with vitiligo. And if it’s a google image,you’re a kid trying to hide your face.you’re trying to love your body? Show your real face.
@@UnicornBySprinkle Im not using it for attention, i have it mostly on my arms and knees, and the patches i had on my right cheek disappeared after puberty, i have it since i was 4yo. What baffles me is how offended you got by someone talking about self-improvement and self-acceptance. I'm not fishing for likes or approval i was only telling my story and my journey, i apologize if i gave the wrong impression.
@𝚠𝚎𝚒𝚛𝚍𝚘 ت cows are indeed super cute!!
A doctor asked me if I’d gained or lost weight recently coz i was having stomach issues and i said that I’d gained about 10 pounds and she laughed and said you gained and still only weigh this much? A DOCTOR
Doctor or not. Yess they're like that.
a doctor asked me if I ever tried to put a toothbrush to force myself to vomit or anything as such, because I was too skinny I had to be anorexic
I was 16 years old, very embarrassing situation
Oh god sorry that happened to you :(
As a person who's both been skinny and fat shamed, I agree that both hurt. But like you, I've come to accept that my self worth isn't tied to others' perception of my body. I'm comfortable in my skin and that's what matters.
My 11 year old daughter was just telling me how she is constantly feeling bullied at school about being tall and thin. We’re talking 5’6, 00/000 jeans size, in 6th grade. Easily a head taller than everyone she knows. She is absolutely beautiful and has such a kind heart. I just told her she’s beautiful and not to let other people’s words define her view of herself or her self worth. I wish this was talked about more.
she could be a model with that body type
Your daughter is fabulous and I hope you tell her every day. I was her once and now I’m an adult woman wearing a 0. Same height. We’re graceful and elegant.
"Skinny shaming isn't a thing"
Say that to my 18 year-old self who was crying in the school's bathroom because my PE teacher screamed from the other part of the gym that my parents are not feeding me and that I only eat on mondays. (I wasn't even that underweight, I was just training a lot for an admission exam)
She wouldn't have dared to say anything to my chubbier colleagues
Wait huh why did she say that 💀
Mmm…hun….let be fight that PE teacher😤👊
But seriously that’s very unprofessional of the teacher and definitely not okay.
@@soup_sarah8590 i'll join im bringing lego pieces for her to step on
She should get fired.
That's called jealousy honey, she's dying to have a body like yours.
I think that the problem is that skinny shaming is done with envy and hate because "it's the beauty standard", while the concept of fat shaming is that "fat is ugly". (note that I DON'T FEEL THIS WAY, it's just what I've noticed). I had a friend, very cute, petite frame with some curves, skinny shame one of my other friends because "she's so tall and skinny, she looks like an an0rexic b1tch". She was obviously just envious. I once heard a girl, she had a small chest, talking about that petite friend of mine saying "look, that's when you realize a person is a wh0re. She obviously has a pushup bra and is arching her back", while she just has big but still perky boobs. It's all based in envy. While on the other hand, being fat shamed is just for pure hate and oppression (I was fat myself). I have always had a pretty face, I have to admit it, so I've never been called ugly. But I was called tub of lard, whale, I've been told that I "smell like a fat pig", that I would break chairs, and once an old classmate of mine kicked me in the ass because he wanted to make me fall and "dig a hole till the middle of the Earth". So I agree that in general fat shaming is more of an oppressive thing, but skinny shaming exists too. It's just different.
Hard to say. When I was tall and skinny in highschool I was made fun of and I don't think it's cuz I looked good. I was weird
The only thing I disagree with is the use of the word “oppressive” I think it’s just bad wording tbh, I was fat too I got bullied for being fat but being bullied is not the same thing as being oppressed. If being bullied/shamed for my body is oppression then I personally and now more oppressed now that I lost the weight, no has ever spoken more hatefully, more rudely, more negatively about my body than they ever did when I was fat. I’m obviously not oppressed but I hope you kinda get what I’m saying lol
So being called anorexic, stick figure, and starved, and not a real woman, the walking dead, and being forced to eat twice the amount your whole family eats because "no one will want to marry a twig" is out of envy only? Then my whole family must really be envious of my cousin including her own dad.
Hard to agree with that. But
I respect your point of view though I feel is very biased.
And why are we calling that oppression though? That is not oppression.
I think with some cases of skinny shaming it's because the shamer is envious/jealous of the person they are shaming, whilst with fat shaming this (I assume) never happens because of envy and jealousy.
One of my colleagues asked me "have you noticed the increase of body diversity in the media lately? Surely things are getting better" and I replied "I still don't know anyone who wants to be fat."
I'm sure a lot of skinny shaming happens not because of envy/jealousy, but because their body is deemed ugly or "not the right kind of skinny" by the shamer.
Likewise, many shamers think most fat bodies are ugly, but there is an added element of the moralization of weight which means fat people are thought of as dumb, lazy and greedy (gluttony and sloth).
People deemed too skinny or too fat are both food policed, but not in the same way and probably not at the same frequency. Being fat and choosing to get ice cream is seen as a moral failing, whilst being skinny and being told to eat a burger or family members pushing food at you feels more like it comes from an angle of patronizing concern (that you can't eat enough to save your life, you obviously need help eating more).
@@itsalwayshalloweenexceptwh5118 maybe i'm seeing things, but your language on both sides is pretty interesting.
Do you mean that you'll only believe body diversity once people start wanting to be fat, orthat when fat people start being looked at with the same envy and jealousy as skinny people? if that's the case i don't understand why people have to desire to be or become fat in order for different body types to be represented in the media, and not forgetting that it's not a matter of aesthetics alone, there's a lot of health concerns surrounding obesity bigger weights. There are people out there that do try and succeed at becoming fat, and many people in Fat acceptance and HAES community (i see them mostly in tiktok) do state that they are happier when fat, and want to remain fat, and while they know they can they're choosing to not lose weight, so there's it. Also not everybody wants to be skinny, or buff for example, but those are all bodies showcased in BoDi. I could go on to more body types, but i'm keeping it at weight related stuff.0
the other side isn't roses either. Skinny people are also thought of as promiscuous, addicts, and disordered. All negative things on the moral aspect too.
On the policing of food both examples can be applied to both sides, though I agree that people are more emboldened at fatshaming.
Soooooo relatable 😶 I was skinny shamed for many years and even considered getting breast implants because I wasn't "curvey enough" and men weren't going to want a "stick". It wasn't until my late 20s that my metabolism slowed down and I was able to gain weight. Then I was judged for not being toned enough.. 😑 We just have to appreciate our bodies however they are. They do SO much for us. ❤💕 Thank you for this video!
I am not even done with this video yet at the time of typing this but I am SO glad you are addressing this topic. I as a skinny girl have been on the receiving end of skinny shamming (but fortunately not nearly as much as I have heard others go through). While fat shamming is a huge problem and I really want these people to be treated fairly - we can't completely ignore skinny shamming either. Yes there is skinny privilege but that doesn't mean that skinny people don't get bullied for their body type. The societal beauty standards are narrow in image - most people won't fit this image including the skinny people. We are expected to still have curves and c cup breasts with a round and noticeable behind... We need to realize that we all go through hardships and the best way to make changes and grow is to bond together as one.
why is REAL women plus sized , are skinny women not real to yall body shamming is body shamming there is no in between at the end of the day period .Love this video!!!!
I noticed “skinny shaming” it hits a certain way for East Asians/Japanese folk. I’m an adult Asian female. I used to be kinda chubby throughout most of my childhood and spent a lot of time wearing slightly loose clothes between middle school and high school. I didn’t like exercise and while I did eat healthy foods (thanks to my Japanese mom making healthy traditional meals), I still craved sweets & chips.
I went through a phase of gaining way too much weight and no one ever commented about my weight, especially non-Asian people. Most people think I’m “normal” or “average” when I’m 20-40 lbs overweight. Also since I become even more apple shaped when I gain weight (basically skinny arms & ankles, but rounded stomach), I’m more likely to be told I’m not a “real fat person” when I have clothes on. People either scrutinize or celebrate (fetishize) my body type because I’m “not like one of those skinny Asian b***es” (which I overheard once and thought it was extremely rude). Having to hear that makes me want to work out and eat healthy to spite those people. I’ve had health scares in the past including high blood pressure, high cholesterol, pre-diabetes, and had to get surgery to remove a diseased gallbladder. I don’t want people yelling “yah gurl eat that cake/steak!” when I’m legitimately trying not to die early or get a limb amputated.
Good luck on your journey❤️ Remember it is your journey, don’t let anyone tell you what you should or shouldn't…🌈💫
We don’t know each other but I am so proud of you! I wish you good luck in making your body healthier ❤️
rlly? but its a flex to get told that you should eat a cake coz that means their jealous that ur a skinny queens
when I was the “chubby kid” I was fat shamed by my peers and my family. At the age of 16 I decided to start doing sports and eat healthy (whatever it meant at that time). After 2 years, when I’ve lost a lot of weight, I experienced waaay worse body shaming, especially from older people. it truly hurt me, sometimes I went home crying after meeting those people: they always told me that I look like a worm (like wtf), I have lost my “beauty and charm”/my boobs, I look way worse now, they bet that I do not eat normally etc… At that time I was 48 kg and 163 cm and I ran a lot (I still do cause I love it, although I have gained some weight since).
As someone who personally experienced way more hurtful skinny shaming (my aquantances still remember and talk about “the ugly and skinny me”), it feels so wrong to know that people think skinny shaming is not that bad/a flex/etc.
I am against every type of body shaming and am glad to see You made a video on this topic!
I have had almost exactly similar experience.....it really does mess you up inside....I hope you always keep loving yourself because that is what you deserve love.
Same thing happened to me, my family (who are all obese or overweight btw) talk shit on my body way more than they ever did when I was fat, they have more problems with me eating two good sized meals a day (I don’t eat lunch bc eating makes me tired and I don’t like being tired in the middle of the day lol) than when I ate 3 plates of food for every meal plus loads of snacks throughout they say, I was eating till I was so sick I couldn’t move.
I don't love the whole "focus on what your body can do" thing just because I'm disabled, there's a lot of stuff my body *can't* do, and it sucks.
@@EmilyKinny I know, I just... eh, as someone whose body lets them down a lot, this way of thinking doesn't work for me and the way it's worded is almost always centred on abled people.
I just like a more really neutral way of thinking, like just, accepting your body exists and doesn't need to meet any standards of look OR performance.
Yk, how it's meant doesn't always matter, there's also how it's read. Especially by the people most affected.
100% agree. Im tired of people actively leaving us out of the conversation.
@@vivi-ws9yl I've seen contradicting statements about this and honestly cannot figure out where it started...
Anyway, I think it's great that fat people have a movement, it's absolutely needed. But there seems to be lacking intersectionality in most mainstream body positivity and that sucks...
Your mind is not lacking ! Sharp af 🔥
That's one of the reasons I didn't want to get on board, my dad was disabled and it automatically made me think of him, and how unfair that would be. I'm also trans and have a very complicated relationship with my body. Having body neutrality sounds good on paper, but I can't just choose to not hate parts of it. Plus, once I do feel comfortable in my own skin, I want to feel positive about that, not just neutral.
I'm happy this topic was talked about. As a not-so-skinny girl and as someone who doesn't support the body positivity movement anymore (body neutrality all the way baby!), the thin side of body positivity is often looked over. It's BODY shaming for a reason y'all! As long as you have a body, whether it's thick or thin, people are going to judge you for it because 1) they are assholes and 2) they don't have anything going on for themselves. Even though I'm not a big fan of the body positivity movement like I used to, I appreciate people like Clara Dao for standing up for thin women and to be proud of her body.
I don’t understand why we all feel the need to critique each other physically
I remember some "friends" & "relatives" even asking me 'why do u workout ,you have no weight to lose' like wth I don't workout just to lose weight ..
every body type should be equally respected.let's wish for that
i love the way zoe makes her videos omg! they’re always so well researched and informational. it’s fun to watch, but you’re always learning something new (obviously with the interruption of the la sirens) but i just appreciate how much effort she puts into her videos ❤
same thing for me I've experienced both types of body shaming and i must say that neither is less hurtful than the other- people really need to acknowledge that,, they made and still Today make me feel just as uncomfortable as I've always been when someone comments on my appearance in that manner.
i have amazing days when i feel super confident in my body, but very often i wanna crawl out of my own skin. learning how to appreciate my body either way, give it a try
My own mother and family has always body shamed me. No wonder I've always had insecurities and low self esteem since childhood. Still do.
I've also experienced both: I was fatshamed before losing weight and then after was skinnyshamed, I guess you'll never win
Thank you for this!! As a woman with very little curves and a straight, naturally, thin figure, I have been told so many times to "eat a burger". Also been acused of not eating enough. I eat a lot! I have felt like I am not a woman due to that lack of curves. I also joke (secretly cry inside) that I look like a 12 year old boy. Then when the "real woman have curves" movement arrived, that idea was just validated. I am learning to embrace the figure I have now, but it has been hard.
@@annie1284 its more about lack of curves , a straight figure. It is something I have heard growing up , not my own phrase. I don't identify that way anymore. I finally feel feminine.
@@annie1284 girl💀
without wide hips women die in childbirth
@@xmoreno3366 really? I feel like I know a lot of women without hips that are mothers, myself included
@@annie1284 valid points for sure! I did have a natural childbirth though. I hadn't considered the possibility that I was too small or not curvy enough to give birth. Never crossed my mind.
that girl saying skinny people cant have body dysmorphia made me feel really bad about myself cause i do
She managed to inverse the stupid “fat people can’t be anorexic” argument.
I wonder what size she thinks you stop being anorexic at once you lose enough weight? Like, are you anorexic until you hit size 4 and then you’re cured?
I hate when people claim “skinny shaming does not exist” it angers me so much I have been fat, skinny fat, and skinny and no matter what body shape or type I am in the end there are still people who shame me like “oh you’ve gotten skinny eat more” or “you should go on a diet your getting bigger” When I say “body positive” I don’t only mean plus size people I mean all body types and that’s how it should be… being body positive means to be positive about ur body.
My philosophy professor says " in person , everything needs to be beautiful. Soul and body ". But, it seems that our society cares only about the body and not the state of the soul. People go crazy with their body image. U are what you are , u can try to be lighter or heavier , but body image is an obsession in this crazy society.
I have been both on the heavier and the lighter side but weirdly enough, I never felt like I was skinny-shamed as much as I was fat-shamed until I watched this video. Looking back, many of the passing comments people said about my body when I lost weight, I took as a compliment when in reality, they weren't. Some reflections were made due to this video. Thank you, Zoe! For all the things that you do 🤍✨
It's funny. When People are naturally skinny, people would skinny shame them. But when fat people transform into skinny, they would be praised.
As someone who’s been both ‘over’ and ‘under’ weight, I just want to say it’s best to find peace within. And while that’s easier said than done, it is the only stable solution because educating society will take a hell of a lot longer. Love and light for u all 💕
The fact that as a child my overweight friends & their moms were allowed to tell me I was skin & bones or needed to eat a burger and nobody batted an eyelash but if I dare called their daughters fat I was labeled as a mean girl speaks volumes about the real problem with body positivity. Skinny or conventionally attractive girls are taught from a young age to almost completely identify with their bodies/ looks while fat girls are taught to grow different aspects of their personalities and that looks aren’t everything. It was way more common for people to bully the skinny girl with no boobs in school than the fat girls (there were way more fat girls anyways so who is really marginalized)
it is not. fat girls r bullied all the time and more so than skinny people.
That also was my case when I was a child... they even called me anorexic
YES! THEY ALWAYS DID!@@Anonima-1819
Being skinny and always supporting your friends who have body issues while they constantly shame you is one of the most annoying things to experience lmao
Bruh dump themmm
I would stop supporting them at that point.
I had a friend in middle school/early high school that was absolutely relentlessly bullied for being too skinny. All the comments you mentioned, you’re anorexic, eat a burger, you’re flat, etc. it was exhausting for me to defend her, I can only imagine how exhausting it was for her to go through
yeah people think being "skinny" is a good thing but not always, it's not always a compliment . they don't understand, we get so many people saying "eat more", "your arms are so skinny", "stick legs". yeah i totally agree with this video and we need more people to understand this topic.
I have gotten those exact comments so many times from my mother throughout my life. Like I am not even underweight or anything, I just have a naturally thin and petite figure. I can't even "eat more" because I get sick from overeating.
@@shakirashipslied9721 I totally agree!!
my personal experience with skinny shaming hasn't really been about my body's appearance but rather everybody assuming i had an ED and concern trolling. it got really old after a while.
That’s why I don’t like the “body positivity “ it’s only body positivity when someone isn’t skinny.
I used to be very thin, I weighted 45kgs (and even less) at 1,65. People used to make fun of me at every ocasion, that i am just skin and bones, no breasts no bottom. Now I gained some weight and I stand at 63, and gathered a little belly. Everybody I know point it out to me... Like you can't never win with people..seriously. They will always find something to comment about your appearance.
love this so much. i have been shamed for being super thin and flat by so many people especially my parents to the point they'd force me to eat till i got nauseous and I'd be at the dinner table for hours just trying to finish everything. Throughout high school my body image got so bad that I'd constantly be talking about wanting a boob job and a BBL and I'd eat excessive junk food just so i could gain some weight and make the shaming stop. Also i loved what u said about fat and skinny shaming not being a competition, somehow people always bring that up and say that my experience doesn't matter or isn't as 'bad'
Why would someone comment on someone's body in a negative way,I never understood. I was skinny shamed all the time growing up and I remember back in school I didn't even want to wear skirts and shorts cause I was ashamed of how skinny my legs were. There are so many more interesting things that someone can talk about instead of commenting on your body or asking how much you weight. I don't care if someone comments on my body anymore, it's their issue not mine. Well said Zoe 👏
"both hurt" exactly
As someone who has been almost 100 kg and then experienced an ED, let me tell u fat shaming and skinny shaming, are body shaming and that shit hurts af
Ppl should just stop comenting on other ppl bodies
Not only is it just as bad as fat shaming, but people with EDs thrive off of skinny shaming. It validates that what they’re doing is “working”. It’s a sad, vicious cycle ):
@a e - c h a yeah, anorexia and bulimia arent the only EDs. Bigorexia, BED, Prader Willi syndrome (i think), ARFID, what else did i miss?
@@thecatsays4666 and ARFID as well, although arfid doesn't have to do with body image
@@meurysbonillo4248 i'll add it there :)
Op, anorexia and bulimia arent the only EDs. Bigorexia, BED, Prader Willi syndrome (i think), ARFID, what else did i miss?
@@thecatsays4666 I should have specified and said restrictive eating disorders accompanied by body dysmorphia. There are all sorts of eating disorders including OSFED, pica, orthorexia, diabulima, and even muscle dysmorphia. I recognize that not all eating disorders coincide with the pursuit of thinness. My comment was more from personal experience rather than a generalization of all eating disorders.
guys we literally can’t win, big or small, fat or thin, love yourselves no matter what!
I’ve been skinny shamed my whole tween years and still a little more at teenage years. I’ll never forget those group of boys laughing at my face and saying “YOU are going to the gym?” “Lol, careful not to break yourself” “she’ll never get thick, she’s a stick” “honestly, you’re wasting your time”. It was a conversation between MY FRIENDS AND ME about how happy I was feeling over my progress, I was finally getting stronger and changing to heavier weights. Gosh, I tried to ignore the comments, I really did. But all I could do at the time was cry. And then the teacher came to try and talk to them (I was even more embarrassed when she did that) and they so cowardly denied everything, saying I misheard them and I was being dramatic… so yeah, skinny shaming exists too.
i love how zoe always talks about things that really need to be talked about. i, myself never really put on weight until i was about 14 and was always told how nice and skinny i look. now because i kind of feel as if my worth is based on this "being skinny" i kind of developed an ed. and online people are like "how can you have body dysmorphia if you're already thin" and the thing is i just don't feel well in my body. i know i'm skinny and i also don't really want to put on too much weight but i feel like nowadays people kind of don't take it serious if someone skinny says they don't feel well in their body.
Hey Zoe!
I just wanted to thank you so much for discussing these types of topics because I feel like it’s really helped me and so many other people feel more comfortable and confident in our bodies. You’ve literally changed my mindset completely about how I shouldn’t feel pressured to fit into the unrealistic expectations of what an attractive woman should look like. I’m busy learning and exploring body neutrality, while going at my own pace, and have never felt more comfortable and confident with myself. You truly are an inspiration, you’re doing great sweety💛
fr, am underweight and bigger ppl told me i don't deserve body positivity because i "fit into the norm and therefore don't get bullied" like wtf
sorry i have a fast metabolism
lucky you. embrace your body
I grew up with body shaming, and fat shaming specifically. I was the child with “baby fat” or the “chubby kid” and it hurt because I was always made to feel ugly for everything from my curves to my hair to my skin tone. It was difficult, but I don’t hate myself now and I feel like I have a moderately healthy relationship with food. I love the idea of body neutrality though. I’ve never heard the term before but I think that’s what I began doing. I allow myself to criticize my body on some days, if I know I haven’t taken proper care of it and it’s starting to show, and I praise myself a lot, especially when I find an outfit that is absolutely beautiful on my body.
I also agree that skinny shaming exists, I’ve seen it and I know it hurts. I feel bad that people don’t like to acknowledge it because they’re focused on fat shaming and the messed up medical system and not the mental health that comes with any type of body shaming. All bodies should be accepted and respected.
You and Clara are my favourite people who talk about these topics, you go girls. 💗🙌🏻
Yesss, a great fitness youtuber Natacha Oceane said "how I look is the least interesting thing about me" and it was a game changer. Her whole mindset is that fitness is something to improve your body's performance with and to push the limits of what it can do (be it lifting weights or not feeling out of breath when u walk up the stairs), not once does she mention taking care of your body to look a certain way. Her channel really changed alot for me and I feel so much more confident and inspired because of her
Society needs to stop reducing people down to their physical appearance (which most people have little say on overall)
You have no idea how much i needed this video today! Tysm!!!!
I got so many accusations of eating disorders when I was younger, like an absurd amount considering I was thiccc butt and muscular from dancing and ate mountains of spaghetti and ice cream. It wasn’t even like i was a size 0, I was a medium in like everything and still told I was too thin.
i am so happy to see you talk about this finally! i think it's so important to talk about it. Shaming is shaming, i don't understand how people can say (e.g.) telling a fat person to eat a salad is worse than telling a skinny person to eat a burger. you hurt people with your words either way, this is not about body standards. this is about shaming others for how they look. who cares if someone wants to be skinny? this ! is ! not ! about ! body ! standards !
it's body shaming and bullying and it can seriously have an impact on how a person views themselves. body shaming hurts, no matter what way it goes.
heroin-chic (which was the skinny standard in modeling and basically every romcom of the 90s and 2000s) is such a specific look-very thin, but also with a defined waist, broad hips and really long legs. it’s never been about thinness, it’s always been about genetics. smh.
I have people asking me if I do drugs , fat shaming and skinny shaming are different but it doesn't make one less harmful then the other.
THIS IS A GREAT VIDEO!!!
it is not a competition.
These people can relax. If you’re not happy with your body mentally, it doesn’t matter what size you are. You won’t be happy. People hate that others can have the same struggles in different aspects. We all need to lift each other even if you wish you had what someone else hates.
Can we just take a moment to appreciate Zoe about taking such an important topic that not many people talks about with such positivity. Since I was only 10 people started commenting about how skinny I am, how fast can I loss and gain fat, even my dad told me Im too skinny and my mom asked him if he would say it if I was fat.
That video like all the others, wonderful and I am glad I watched it💗
Keep going your the best❣️
As someone who used to be incredibly skinny and now is teetering on the edge of being overweight: skinny shaming is real. I developed an ED in 8th grade when being bullied because I had no ass. I’ve found it now that people don’t fat shame me as much because I think people have more reservations when it comes to fat shaming vs skinny shaming.
ZOE!!! I AM SO HAPPY YOU ARE ADVOCATING FOR US SKINNY PEOPLE WHO’VE BEEN BULLIED FOR IT!!!
Thank you so much for discussing this topic 😘I have been constantly criticized for being skinny and no one really understood my problems 🥺people should accept the fact that skinny shaming is as toxic as fat shaming
I'm sorry to hear that
I blame skinny shaming for the reason I look the way I do now. I lost weight and loved how I looked but everyone around me, including family, just skinny shamed me to the point that I gained it all back on purpose. I am 5 2" and got down to 130 from 160. It was the one time in my life that I felt confident in myself. Yet everyone kept telling me that I looked better before, and an after entire year of maintaining my weight loss but being shamed, I decided to just binge and gain it all back. I have been trying to lose the weight again since then but just can't stick to anything. This Summer it will be two years since I gained it all back and the Summer before that was when I lost it. I wish I didn't listen to other people but when someone is hearing that they look bad all day, everyday from multiple people it's hard not to listen. I was a size 8 in jeans, how is that too skinny? ☹️
I’m sorry to hear that. I think people see fat shaming as more toxic because it affects multiple aspects of their lives, like their ability to get a job or health care. Sometimes “fat” people who as medical issues like cancer are turned away because some professionals refuse to overlook their weight and focus on the issue at hand. However, I believe the world is in need of neutrality. Your body should not set the mark of how you are to be treated or respected, and I hope things turn around for you and that you’ll be surrounded by people who appreciate you for you and not your body ❤
I’ve been skinny shamed my whole childhood and teenage years. Today, I’m a young adult with no confidence or whatsoever. Thank you society for making me feel bad in a world where my opinion doesn’t matter :)
im so happy finally someone talk abt this, ive been referenced to a twig, pencil and other thin items heck even point to be bullied on grade 4 causing me to be ashamed on my body and the fact how hard it is to gain weight even when u eat pounds of food
i mean agree to disagree but I don’t like the fact that you’re saying you’ve “experienced both sides of the spectrum” when you’ve never been obese or drastically overweight. I understand that skinny shaming is a problem but i just don’t think it compares to the constant struggles of living your life obese.
Lets work on not trying to invalidate anyones feelings and emotions surrounding themselves. I understand your frustration, the approach maybe not the best. I wish you the best with loving your body.
I was skinny shamed many times but I was afraid to talk about it because it sounded like I was flexing that I'm skinny but this tipe of videos make me fell much better