“I’m fading it in so that you don’t get scared” that is so kind and considerate, even though I’m not that scared of spiders, I appreciate that so much.
I had an American housemate at uni who didn't grow up in Australia and would go running through long grass on hot days. He didn't seem to understand why all the Australians thought he wanted to die of suicide by eastern brown snake.
As an Australian, sometimes I think we overplay how dangerous it is here. Then I realise I'd forgotten why I consider it a death sentence to run in tall grass in the summer... or pick up firewood. 'Tall Grass + Snake = Death' had turned into 'Tall Grass = Death' and I didn't even think twice about it.
That's the hardest part of a hot day. Do you wear thongs for comfort, or do you get all hot wearing boots because you don't want to die just because you have to walk around the side of the garage for something?
Then there was the great Drop Bear campaign back in the 80's. No one really knows the details, they're kept well under wraps, but the casualties among our boys were catastrophic. As is the cost of PTSD counselling for the survivors (not many of those) and making sure that there are no breaches of security concerning that campaign. But it had to be done, the safety of the nation was at stake like never before!
Well he did mention the drop bears but for got the hoopala snake from the hills of North queensland....they usually found higher up on the hills and when the see their prey below they bite their tails form a loop and roll themselves down hill straight at u in attack mode.🐍
This is a masterpiece. 1) I love talking about them like they're videogame bosses with super-moves 2) I adore the upside down/life subtractor joke to an absurd degree 3) I learned that Australians felt the need to call sprinkles "hundreds and thousands" like that was simpler than a single word.
North Americans see a platypus: Stereotype: "Beaver go Quack" Reality: _"Ah Perry the Platypus what an unexpected surprise. And by unexpected I mean completely expected"_
That's because they're not that common where most of us live. The Bull shark needs to be there sadly, big chunk of our GWS attacks are probably misidentified Bulls, and those bastards come up the rivers.
fun story about kangaroos, their nails are also pretty deadly. I had a friend who owned a farm in rural western australia, she saw a massive male kangaroo in her paddock that was causing a ruckus for her animals and decided she needed to ride back to her house to take it out with a rifle, her son (who was like 12 or something) decided that he could sneak behind and knock it over the head with a plank, she told him not to do that (obviously) and just wait here while she got her rifle, instead as you could imagine, he did it anyway, as she was coming back she saw him try to sneak up on the kangaroo, the kangaroo in a split second turned around grabbed him and was about to gut him with his claws, when her sheep dog jumped on the roo with all four legs and knocked him over, giving them both time to escape. The moral of the story is dont mess with roo's
Yeah. I've heard plenty of stories of dogs getting gutted when trying to save something. We have both the Western grey and Red kangaroos here, which are the largest of the macropods. RIP Roger.
Yeah, that was my first thought when they popped up too! But he does also have a fair point about their flammability... Given all of that: even though I love their smell & patterns/colours of their bark I would NEVER plant one anywhere near a house, even in usually-less-on-fire environment we got over here... 🙄
@@PWLfr There are trees on an island called Lady Musgrave and they create a sticky goop that birds nesting on the island get stuck too them during the nesting season. That sap builds up eventually enough that the birds can no longer fly, die on the ground and become the nutrients for the trees. You can visit the island to see it and can confirm shitloads of shit and dead birds.
Fun fact: Australia has a spider season, where spiders are so numerous you can barely see the ground. Literally nightmare fuel. Somehow, Australian see this as perfectly normal.
I've spent most of my life in Melbourne which doesn't have a spider season. Although while I lived in the Riverina region (N.S.W-Vic border) I saw the spider season you speak of. As an Australian I can tell you it's even horrifying for us. It's breeding season for various spiders who use threads of silk to fly on the wind, the birds take a bunch of them out but it's possible to end up with whole areas coated in millions of orb weaving spiders a couple of days after it starts. Imagine a tree coated in snow... until you realize it's spider webs and it's not a tree it's all the trees and the shrubs and the grass and your car and your house and your shoes and I think you can get the picture. Honestly I'm getting shivers just remembering. Within a short period of time the numbers drop drastically because the strongest eat the rest, but the survivors end up pretty fucking big and because they're Australian they're also venomous. Not deadly but still enough to make you have a bad day.
When I was about 12, many years ago, one of me mates got his nut sack caught in a trampoline spring. The poor bastard's scream is still echoing around the hills!
You forgot a couple. The Emu. In the 1930s Australia fought a war against Emus and lost. The Cassowary. Kind of like an Emu with big talons that hate you and want you to die. The Gympie Gympie. While it could be put under the tree category, it deserves a special mention. This is the most painful tree in the world. If you touch it you will be in agony for weeks or months. There is no relief, only pain. Also, the Australian Magpie deserves a mention. If you go near their nest when they have young, they will repeatedly dive bomb you until you go away. Not lethal, but very scary.
points you missed: - eucalyptus trees can drop their branches randomly. they were know has widowmaker trees back in the 19th century due to dropping heavy branches on men and killing them. - not only do irukandji jellyfish cause enough pain to make you suicidal, they're also about the size of your thumbnail, and their tentacles can reach up to 1 metre. they're also translucent in the water :) - australia contains the entire top 10 most venomous and dangerous snakes in the world. - you can smear vegemite behind your ears to prevent dropbear attacks. the smell is very strong and dropbears tend to avoid it. thanks for coming to my ted talk
Love when he lets his old accent out here and there. The Australian accent, like the South African accent, is such a unique and pleasant thing to listen to
@@senshikazemachinima8223 so for you being 20 is being old? because it's my age and I can totally tell what it's about. I have younger siblings who can tell as well
2:38 I think my favorite part about the accent for the platypus segment is it actually takes a few seconds to fade out as you reassert a North American accent rather than being a hard cut.
But we did tell America about 100 years ago. They planted a bunch in Cali. Takes about 100 years for them to mature so we're kinda at fault for sending them a bunch of exploding trees and burning the state to the ground.
Kinda surprised you didn't mention the gympie-gympie, the plant so painful if you touch it, and *sometimes for months*, that people have killed themselves because of it.
in my family we spent several years naming any we found after harry potter characters "Oh look George just moved a bit" or "I saw a new one in the toilet, should we call it Voldemort?" "Nah that name's already taken. What about Hagrid?"
Once we had a funnel web near the door of our house, so dad hit it with a cricket bat. It went flying into the nearby garage wall, where it was promptly assaulted by a couple of big huntsman spiders. Good day.
@@lachlanmckinnie1406 who knew? I’d shit my organs out if I saw either but it’s good to know that huntsmen will protect you from the actually dangerous big spiders
I'm amazed there are people that didn't get the joke. They must either be a lost generation or they haven't yet seen a TV. Guess which group are commenting on this video?
I as anxious about watching this one because I knew Huntsman Spider was gonna be on here but when I saw he was fading it in so we wouldn't get scared I almost cried. How thoughtful
Huntsman spiders are pretty dangerous when, like what happened to me, one emerges on the inside of your motorcycle helmet visor because it got too cold near the air vents at 120kph down the highway. I didn't stack my bike, but I did set a Guinness world record forr fastest controlled dismount and dishelmeting record.
😂😂😭😭😭😭😭 SO MUCH NOPE. I nearly veered across the highway ditch into oncoming traffic one day because a jumping spider decided he wanted to drive me to work. If a Hu team came down INSIDE my motorcycle helmet against my face…well that’s why I don’t own a motorcycle or live in Australia.
Exactly for situations like this I think spontaneous death is an underrated superpower. No way in fuck am I going to deal with that situation and live with the trauma, I’d rather just die on the spot
@@TheDonutMan3000 @Moritz R Well when such thing happens to you, you become a stunt rider instantly and you go 140 to 0 in 0.1 seconds with a stoppie then you break the helmet taking off record as well, at least i know i did.
As an Australian I can confirm trees are really dangerous for many reasons: -They easily fall and kill people -Always on fire -As they are on fire, they limit a character’s ability to see more than 50m away
Camping rule No.1 in australia is to never camp under a gum tree because every australian gum tree follows murphys law and WILL fall on your tent. Also gumtrees were the cause of the first ever recorded fire tornado in my home town so pretty cool (hot actually) ey?
I know you didn't put anything in F-tier as a joke, but I think budgies and bearded dragons definitely belong there (along with the iconic quokka, because come on, how can you say to that smile?) For a decade I kept two budgies (one blue/white, one yellow) named Elvis and Presley, and while they couldn't talk (though I've tried getting them to many times), they loved kissing my fingers, flying around in our apartment (including at the top of kitchen cabinets by cookie jars and all we'd see is them looking down at us when we enter), and people/wildlife watching from the windows. My blue budgie in particular loved trying to camouflage with the curtains and the window trims since the curtains were blue and the window trim paint was white. I've kept a beardie named Frank (after Frank Lloyd Wright; my favorite architect) since 2013 and he's the most chill lizard I've ever come cross. Never bites, love to climb onto me, and when I pet him, he makes the cutest grin. However, beardies get a few points deducted for one biting Steve Irwin in the nose Another mention for F: The rhinoceros roach, the world's heaviest roach and it is native to Queensland. While people think roaches are pests, the vast majority of them actually aren't. This includes the rhinoceros roach. Completely harmless, they don't even have wings, they're kept as pets in their native country, and they help the ecosystem by consuming dead eucalyptus leaves and recycling other matter
"Be very wary if they seem to have something in their pouch because it's probably a Glock." Can confirm, I've sold many Glocks to Kangaroos in my lifetime.
Your Mate Tom nooo! Magpies are cute. I feed they in my backyard. Magpies can share meal with other small birds, but Ravens don’t. Ravens always bully other birds.
@@johnyrocket0015 Yarp... Less so though. Compared to Alabama, where it's truely believed even around the world, it's more just a jab at Tasmania than anything, all countries have the place that's made fun of. However it is still believed by some, as all stereotypes are.
And on my roof, my fence, and my Hills hoist. I had 8 around my house in Port Augusta, planted by an idiot, and after 10 years of guerilla dropping, Housing Trust finally lopped them
Here in Italy, if you lie on a meadow, the worst it can happen to you is getting a tick stuck to an uncomfortable place. In Australia you can die several painful deaths by several different animals. Or suffer immensely because of non deadly but painful bites.
Paralysis tick and Shellback are deadly. some have lime disease that will affect you for life. Bush tick are annoying but when they are young not so bad. As a kid I went rolling in the bush and ended up head to toe. After a tea tree bath there was over 300 of the little suckers on the bottom of the bath like a silt layer.
@@cloudcretang2920 In the north west, at the border with Austria, ticks appear to be infected with encephalitis but it seems you don't get it if you manage to remove the tick in the first few hours. Don't know why. That said, I hate ticks with a passion, useless nasty critters...
6:38 this might lead to a misunderstanding. It doesn't like Vegemite in the way that it becomes more aggressive, it hates it as in it won't go near anyone who has had Vegemite within the last 24 hours. This also pairs with its ability to target non-australian accents as a way to kill tourists.
Yeah I visited Australia as a tourist, we had all eaten Vegemite except for my longer brother, who refused saying it was nasty. One of them attacked him and killed him. I miss you every day, John.
As an Australian, can confirm trampolines are one of the most deadly animals in Australia. Edit: Thanks for the likes, it would mean a lot if just 1 person checked out my daily jokes :)
FunFact: It wasn't the Stingray who killed Steve, it was Steve who killed Steve, first by invading the Stingray's space, and then Steve killed himself by pulling out the stinger after catching it in the chest. Another fellah got stun through the heart and they left it in to come out naturally without doing more damage to the heart and he's just fine now. If Steve woulda just left it in... anyhoo.
Absolutely gobsmacked that not only were magpies not included at all, but that they weren't S tier. I fear for my life on a daily basis at their hands (or should i saw claws)
@@pirahna0145 Launceston native bro, magpies are pretty much only attracted to bogan cunts and rarly swoop as much as they do in places like QL Plovers though, swoopy fucks can and WILL ruin your bbq pretty bloody quick
I watched his show every week when he was alive and I was a little kid. Was literally a huge part of my childhood and to this day I can remember the commercials paying tribute to him. I cried for days and I hated sting rays passionately for a while.
Crystal so Steve knew every time that he picked up an animal it would try to kill him. Sting rays are no different. Sting rays are honestly awesome. This just shows how dangerous all animals are not to handle them unless a professional.
I lived in Australia for three years. We had funnel spiders on our patio, but we ignored each other. NBD. The worst, though, was the *Telstra.* It hunts you down where ever you go, and when you least expect it, refuses to allow you to keep your old phone number when you get a new phone. Worse, it will then send its horrifying double edged bill to destroy you, by charging you for both phones simultaneously. Thank the Lord I moved back to the US, where I can at least dump AT&T into the ocean when I want.
@@dkt5992 there's a UA-camr called videogamedunkey who has a spin move meme. It started when he was doing league of legends but he still occasionally sneaks a spin move reference into his video. The meme was that, in league there was some dumbass character that could do this BS op spin or something and just get himself out of any situation.
I knew he was from Tassie because of the jack jumpers. I've lived all over the mainland and never seen a jack jumper outside of Tassie. Also I love how to be a successful Tasmanian all you need to do is leave...
*sad quoka noises*, literally the only non deadly, cute animal in australia. let's ignore the fact that they are native to a smaller island with zero natural predators so they never developed a fear instict so they are extremely friendly with humans,
I mean, tbh the only danger that possums posses is the terrifying noises they make but they do fall on cars when they get electrocuted on the power lines so maybe that counts for danger factor
@@peepeetrain8755 Bearded dragons are nice if you tame them properly. Used two own two of them, but they sadly passed away from cancer. Very affectionate lizards
Along with constantly being on fire, you failed to mention that eucalyptus trees have a tendency to decide they're tired of their branches and randomly just hurl them at cars and unsuspecting people camping.
The scary thing about this video is that although everything he said is true, there are still things he missed. The Cassowary: a 6ft chicken that has a claw so sharp it will rip your heart out with one kick. The Stinging Bush AKA The Suicide Plant: This innocuous looking fern is covered in thousands of tiny hairs that, when lightly touched, deliver a neurotoxin in to your body. The hairs get lodged in your skin and often leave an open pathway straight to your nerve which becomes incredibly painful when touched by wind or water. The agonising pain can last months if untreated, leading to people choosing death as the easier option - thus being dubbed the suicide plant. The Redback Spider: Well known to be one of only a few venomous spiders in the world. This tiny spider is only around 3mm long but has a penchant for residing in large cities which often brings it in close contact with a large population base. Although an effective antivenom now exists, if left untreated a bite from this spider will often lead to death. The Magpie (added by popular demand): I kid you not, the magpie is a fucker. This bird is common around the world, but for some reason the magpies in Australia are particularly teritorial and will attack anyone found cycling or running near their nest. A common defence many Australians have taken to deploying is the use of cable ties on their bike helmet (Google: cable tie bike helmet) to deter the Magpies from swooping. Yes, this is 100% normal. In September 2019, a 76-year old man was killed by a swooping Magpie that made him crash his bike. These are no joke. The Puffer Fish: Although not native to Australia, this fish is commonly found along the shores of the more tropical regions such as Northern Queensland, Northern Territory and Western Australia. They contain a neurotoxin which is up to 1,200 times more poisonous than cyanide, with enough toxin in one fish to kill 30 adult humans. Oh, and did I mention no known antidote currently exists? The Bull Shark: They don't receive as much attention as their cousin The Great White, but the bull shark is actually a lot more feared among Australian citizens. The Bull Shark is notoriously aggressive and, unlike the great white that tends to only attack humans by accident, the bull shark hunts humans for sport. They can reside in shallow coastal waters and often swim up to 100 km inland via rivers making swimming in rivers dangerous, even in the parts where crocodiles don't frequent. Textile Cone Snail: This snail grows up to 15cm in length - but don't let its diminutive size fool you. The Textile Cone Snail contains enough venom to kill up to 60 human adults, and their venom-injecting tooth is sharp enough to penetrate gloves AND wetsuits.
Been living in the bush for 20 years, I’ll still scream bloody murder and promptly destroy the thing if it exists near me, same goes for every other spider/snake. Fuck those guys.
Casually Explained: Even the trees are dangerous Vietnam veterans: *I KNEW IT* The Sun being in S-tier makes perfect sense because as a wise man once said, the Sun is a deadly lazer. This also doesn't change the fact that the Australian flag is nothing more than a British reaction vid
@@MapsaiLiv One common name for Aussie is "The land down under". Common joke is that everything is upside down or reversed from northern hemisphere. Therefore you get: Death//Life Adder//Subtractor For Adder, think maths, "to add" TL:DR It's a pun of sorts.
@@silverdragon122 Venomous and no not really, they're pretty much completely harmless. It's the redbacks that will give you a hard time despite being like 10% the size.
For some reason my primary school in Australia never talked about the murderous wildlife. “Yeah jimmy go swim my with the poisonous platypus, not like it’s our job the educate you” so much one holiday my family went walking up a wombat trail completely unaware that we could be runned at any moment.
Yes, they are an internet and mobile provider, notorious for bad customer support. Funnily enough, I think others are worse but Telstra is the best known and not that great anyway
“I’m fading it in so that you don’t get scared” that is so kind and considerate, even though I’m not that scared of spiders, I appreciate that so much.
I am incredibly Arachnophobic, and I appreciate you pointing it out. That's what I came to comment.
@@TheZenMaster420 i should have read the comments first
I am a recovered arachnophobe (got therapy), and he was being so considerate. Not enough people do it.
@@ryuuseiSoul where the hell do you get therapy for that?
Yeah, very considerate indeed... And then, boom! Scorpions! And, bam! Snakes! All over the place!
"Death Adder -> Life Subtracter" is a god tier joke
God, laughing in the background.
I was expecting him to make a shitty 'life adder' joke for some reason, so when he said that I literally died laughing
Agreed
Had to pause to finish laughing. Absolute gold.
Was about to say, the writing on that one is incredible.
“They’re basically wasps but they can’t fly. Except for ones that can fly.”
they only have wings when they are mating. they fall off right after.
Reads like a Portal 2 quote lmao
How is that fair
Use bracken on the bite to ease the pain. It's a type of fern.
One of those buggers got me on the heel just the other day. Not happy.
I had an American housemate at uni who didn't grow up in Australia and would go running through long grass on hot days. He didn't seem to understand why all the Australians thought he wanted to die of suicide by eastern brown snake.
Maaate... 😱😱
As an Australian, sometimes I think we overplay how dangerous it is here. Then I realise I'd forgotten why I consider it a death sentence to run in tall grass in the summer... or pick up firewood. 'Tall Grass + Snake = Death' had turned into 'Tall Grass = Death' and I didn't even think twice about it.
@@wafflingmean4477 Look, he's revisiting the pokemon of his childhood.
That's the hardest part of a hot day. Do you wear thongs for comfort, or do you get all hot wearing boots because you don't want to die just because you have to walk around the side of the garage for something?
"I'm fading it in so you don't get scared."
**Editor of the year**
Definitely
For real, i hope he lives a long life
Oyasumi Punpun?
I always avoid those videos that MIGHT show big spiders without a warning. But this guy knows what's up ...
Bless his soul
“His favourite food is a Woolworths sausage laid diagonally on a plain white slice of bread”
Man, this guy really did live in Australia
Made me want to go to bunnings
I don't know mate. He said "faucet" and he did not say "woolies snag" and also he didn't even once call someone a sick cunt
But he didn’t call it fairy bread
He didn’t even call it a snag plus should be from bunnings so it shows he wasn’t here long enough
@@dimipats258 woolies sells the sausages that bunnings uses though right?
the “fading it in so you don’t get scared” was such a good add and probably for his mom who watches his videos and that’s adorable and i respect it
Nah, his mum wouldn't be frightened of a Huntsman.
his mom is tassie she probably kills them with bare hands
Somehow it was even more frightening as it faded in
That definitely helped me. Best thing I've seen anyone do when talking about spiders
@@liquidtotem77 exactly as if it's creeping up on me
I'm glad he mentioned drop bears. People often forget them but they're just as nasty as the snakes. Its true, my cousin once got attacked by one...
Then there was the great Drop Bear campaign back in the 80's. No one really knows the details, they're kept well under wraps, but the casualties among our boys were catastrophic. As is the cost of PTSD counselling for the survivors (not many of those) and making sure that there are no breaches of security concerning that campaign.
But it had to be done, the safety of the nation was at stake like never before!
@@danielharvison7510 what
Those things are terrifying, my brother almost got attacked by one. Really dangerous creatures.
Well he did mention the drop bears but for got the hoopala snake from the hills of North queensland....they usually found higher up on the hills and when the see their prey below they bite their tails form a loop and roll themselves down hill straight at u in attack mode.🐍
drop bears are why I don't hold bears..
"A Tier: Telstra"
Yep, he definitely did live in Australia
Work for Telstra, can confirm, 100% A tier
Can you explain what Telstra is and why its so bad?
@@FiLpLokko Australian Telecommunications Company, doesn't have a great reputation in general.
yeah, it's like it's mandatory for every country to have a telecom company everyone hates.
@@dernahstudent2891 Ok, thanks, I was thinking it could be something like that hahahaha
I like the fact that no one here expected a single F-tier animal to exist in Australia.
Childrens python
qokkas exist in australia
I wasn't even surprised
human
was expecting ibis
"Guess what the opposite of Death Adder is - *LIFE SUBTRACTOR!* " LMAOOO
i fucking died on that one
That one was hilarious lmao
@@stefancraft1 Me too, mate. XD
Best joke
This was goddamn gold
This is a masterpiece.
1) I love talking about them like they're videogame bosses with super-moves
2) I adore the upside down/life subtractor joke to an absurd degree
3) I learned that Australians felt the need to call sprinkles "hundreds and thousands" like that was simpler than a single word.
It's the opposite I'm pretty sure we don't call then hundreds of thousands I think that's a British thing and we call that delicacy fairy bread
No different to calling "Smarties" M&M's.
@@95rav But.. Smarties and M&Ms are two different candies...
@@kylefrank638 and sprinkles and 100's and 1000's are also different.
@@JustDeLuca Oh. I was just going off of what the video was telling me; I had never heard of 100s and 1000s before.
North Americans see a platypus:
Stereotype: "Beaver go Quack"
Reality: _"Ah Perry the Platypus what an unexpected surprise. And by unexpected I mean completely expected"_
Yeah lol I thought of Perry first too 😆👌
Doobiedoobiedoobah doobiedoobiedoobah *A-gent P*
*reveal latest -inator
*give tragic backstory
*platypus presses self-destruct button
As an American, I immediately thought of Perry-
@@justinlumpkin1874 HE'S A SEMI-AQUATIC EGG LAYING MAMALE OF ACTION
You know it’s bad when crocodiles are in the b tier
Lmao
Yea no shit
Well I am pretty sure skin cancer kills more than everything else on this list combined.
*Feels superior*
@@EatMyShortsAU the sun is on the list
That's because they're not that common where most of us live. The Bull shark needs to be there sadly, big chunk of our GWS attacks are probably misidentified Bulls, and those bastards come up the rivers.
8 year old Casually Explained’s adorable Australian accent was definitely S+
quack beaver
S for swoons the ladies
Actually it would be F- because Australia is upside-down
Time stamp
@@vivaciousmyosotis ua-cam.com/video/V0EwM9h-7VM/v-deo.html 0:39
fun story about kangaroos, their nails are also pretty deadly. I had a friend who owned a farm in rural western australia, she saw a massive male kangaroo in her paddock that was causing a ruckus for her animals and decided she needed to ride back to her house to take it out with a rifle, her son (who was like 12 or something) decided that he could sneak behind and knock it over the head with a plank, she told him not to do that (obviously) and just wait here while she got her rifle, instead as you could imagine, he did it anyway, as she was coming back she saw him try to sneak up on the kangaroo, the kangaroo in a split second turned around grabbed him and was about to gut him with his claws, when her sheep dog jumped on the roo with all four legs and knocked him over, giving them both time to escape.
The moral of the story is dont mess with roo's
Yeah. I've heard plenty of stories of dogs getting gutted when trying to save something. We have both the Western grey and Red kangaroos here, which are the largest of the macropods. RIP Roger.
Holy shit
kangaroos are literally harmless all they do is eat your grass this is not an australian commenting istg
@@jrrhkrny4953 What?
good doggo
I actually really appreciate you fading the spider, like fr. You're a real homie
Yeah, that pretty much saved me from getting a panic and heart attack at the same time!
Honestly I’m so thankful
As someone constantly traumatised by all the whitetails and redbacks at home.. couldn't appreciate this more. Instant subscribe
You know he lets his guests in on the Brita water
Actually a g. What a solid move
You also forgot to mention how gumtrees will randomly drop entire branches on you with no warning or visible signs.
Yeah, that was my first thought when they popped up too! But he does also have a fair point about their flammability... Given all of that: even though I love their smell & patterns/colours of their bark I would NEVER plant one anywhere near a house, even in usually-less-on-fire environment we got over here... 🙄
Ah yes. The
*WIDOW MAKERS* 😌
even the trees try to kill you
and large cockatoos will drop pine cones like bombs
@@PWLfr There are trees on an island called Lady Musgrave and they create a sticky goop that birds nesting on the island get stuck too them during the nesting season. That sap builds up eventually enough that the birds can no longer fly, die on the ground and become the nutrients for the trees. You can visit the island to see it and can confirm shitloads of shit and dead birds.
_"eucalyptus trees contain oil-"_
*USA to Australia: *looks like someone needs some FREEDOM**
*Freedom Intensifies* 🇺🇸
Mohammed Al Islam bald eagle screeches in the background 🦅
@@maalisl1 Idk man that username looks like it needs some freedom. (Joke)
Guess which freedom-hating US state is full of Eucalyptus trees? Hint: It's the one that's always on fire.
US wouldn't be interested, its renewable, plant based, and the fumes smell healthy.
Fun fact: Australia has a spider season, where spiders are so numerous you can barely see the ground. Literally nightmare fuel. Somehow, Australian see this as perfectly normal.
I'm guessing thats not in the mid west. Atleast I hope considering I've been living here for my whole life without seeing it
No, that's just on tuesdays
Not true. I have been in Australia my whole life and never seen that.
I've spent most of my life in Melbourne which doesn't have a spider season. Although while I lived in the Riverina region (N.S.W-Vic border) I saw the spider season you speak of. As an Australian I can tell you it's even horrifying for us. It's breeding season for various spiders who use threads of silk to fly on the wind, the birds take a bunch of them out but it's possible to end up with whole areas coated in millions of orb weaving spiders a couple of days after it starts. Imagine a tree coated in snow... until you realize it's spider webs and it's not a tree it's all the trees and the shrubs and the grass and your car and your house and your shoes and I think you can get the picture. Honestly I'm getting shivers just remembering. Within a short period of time the numbers drop drastically because the strongest eat the rest, but the survivors end up pretty fucking big and because they're Australian they're also venomous. Not deadly but still enough to make you have a bad day.
this is bull, never seen that here
Fun fact: Australia is home to 21 of the world’s 25 most venomous snakes
The other four considered moving there but thought, 'This neighborhood is too rough'.
@@dcoy8666 The Black Mamba considered it, but given Australia's historical issues with non-white immigrants it had second thoughts.
I could have sworn there were more than 25 venomous snakes.are they all related?
How was that a "fun" factor, more like another 2020 fact.
Yeah but that’s only in the middle of Australia (the place ppl don’t live in).
Im Australian and I aint lying when I say that the trampoline with the exposed springs gave me chills.
When I was about 12, many years ago, one of me mates got his nut sack caught in a trampoline spring.
The poor bastard's scream is still echoing around the hills!
@@Rob-fc9wg Thanks now I can't sleep.
@@patoverton2199
Aw don't worry mate,
his pain was relatively short-lived and we still laugh about it to this day.
@@patoverton2199 same
one of my friends was playing on their trampoline and a spring snapped and stabbed into their leg. They have a pretty wicked scar from it
You forgot a couple.
The Emu. In the 1930s Australia fought a war against Emus and lost.
The Cassowary. Kind of like an Emu with big talons that hate you and want you to die.
The Gympie Gympie. While it could be put under the tree category, it deserves a special mention. This is the most painful tree in the world. If you touch it you will be in agony for weeks or months. There is no relief, only pain.
Also, the Australian Magpie deserves a mention. If you go near their nest when they have young, they will repeatedly dive bomb you until you go away. Not lethal, but very scary.
You forgot one, Ex- girlfriends
Even when he just talks _about_ Australia his accent shifts at bit. Cool.
First comment
@@youpena7375 nobody cares
@@youpena7375 bruh
@@youpena7375 shush. No clout for you
That’s how it is
“The trees are literally made of oil”
*Star-Spangled Banner starts playing intensely*
ua-cam.com/video/DHLlwiLebkc/v-deo.html
😅
The us meets the tree " careless whisper starts playing "
*fortunate son starts playing*
‘Australian trees found hiding weapons of mass destruction’
points you missed:
- eucalyptus trees can drop their branches randomly. they were know has widowmaker trees back in the 19th century due to dropping heavy branches on men and killing them.
- not only do irukandji jellyfish cause enough pain to make you suicidal, they're also about the size of your thumbnail, and their tentacles can reach up to 1 metre.
they're also translucent in the water :)
- australia contains the entire top 10 most venomous and dangerous snakes in the world.
- you can smear vegemite behind your ears to prevent dropbear attacks. the smell is very strong and dropbears tend to avoid it.
thanks for coming to my ted talk
put forks on your hair, drop bear dilemma solved
or a hedgehog hat will do i guess
niosonwii wasn’t planning to
TL;DR: don't go to australia
Drop bears are myth. Still smeer the vegemite on your ears I want to see it happen
@niosonwii ok!
Love when he lets his old accent out here and there. The Australian accent, like the South African accent, is such a unique and pleasant thing to listen to
Girl: I BET HE'S CHEATING ON ME WHILE STUDYING ABROAD IN AUSTRALIA
Boy: Dies
@@AxxLAfriku It's you again.
"Stingrays"
**Silence**
"See, I haven't even said anything yet and you're already sad."
Damn, didn't expect that joke comin ngl
I don't get it, pls explain
@@ttime441 it's a joke for those of us who are old enough to remember Steve Erwin
@@ttime441 Steve Erwin the Crocodile Hunter died while interacting with a stingray
@@senshikazemachinima8223 So like 20?
@@senshikazemachinima8223 so for you being 20 is being old? because it's my age and I can totally tell what it's about. I have younger siblings who can tell as well
Actually when North Americans see a Platypus they say "Oh, there you are, Perry"
@Isaac Radeka Agent P never kills
@@asgarazwad8724 without hiding the bodies.
@@asgarazwad8724 perry doesnt kill people, people kill people
Only if it's wearing a hat, otherwise I always think "oh it's just an ordinary non-spy platypus"
@@jeepersmcgee3466 True this guy spreading misinformation, it has to have a hat, a fedora is preferrable
2:38 I think my favorite part about the accent for the platypus segment is it actually takes a few seconds to fade out as you reassert a North American accent rather than being a hard cut.
"Stingrays"
I am not crying
You are
*sobs in Steve Irwin fan*
Rip steve
i am incapable of producing that amount of tears.
rip steve irwin
First thought that comes to mind when you hear “stingray”
Aussies: Steve
"I'm fading it so you don't get scared"
My dude, heaven is not worthy of receiving you
He's a chad🔥🔥
Dude, so grateful as well
The trees are literally made of oil
Me: don't tell America
Need some freedom?
*bomb noises in background
@@markosg3424 *fortunate son plays in background*
But we did tell America about 100 years ago. They planted a bunch in Cali. Takes about 100 years for them to mature so we're kinda at fault for sending them a bunch of exploding trees and burning the state to the ground.
REDDIT MOMENT
Kinda surprised you didn't mention the gympie-gympie, the plant so painful if you touch it, and *sometimes for months*, that people have killed themselves because of it.
"The trees in Australia are literally made of oil"
USA: *You know the rules, and so do I*
Yep
www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/oct/23/gough-whitlam-1975-coup-ended-australian-independence
"Say goodbye."
*_LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS~_*
Time to free Australia...
SAAAAY GOODBYEEE
i see why he doesn't post often, it must be real hard to do this level realistic of animation.
It's mostly the beautiful jokes, and dont r/whoosh me
@WrappedDoor............................. r/woooooosh....
Whats a name? r/wooooshwith4os lol
UA-camrs who post infrequent but great content are the best. Examples:
Internet Historian
TierZoo
Casually explained
he's probably thinking a lot of jokes, laugh at it for a while and then thought "nah, this isn't gonna work" and has to redo
You know you’ve met a true Aussie when they speak about Huntsmans as their pets to keep around so they kill other insects
in my family we spent several years naming any we found after harry potter characters
"Oh look George just moved a bit"
or "I saw a new one in the toilet, should we call it Voldemort?" "Nah that name's already taken. What about Hagrid?"
Once we had a funnel web near the door of our house, so dad hit it with a cricket bat. It went flying into the nearby garage wall, where it was promptly assaulted by a couple of big huntsman spiders. Good day.
😐 "promptly assaulted" 😂 I see a cartoon of this in my head and it's wonderful
@@lachlanmckinnie1406 who knew?
I’d shit my organs out if I saw either but it’s good to know that huntsmen will protect you from the actually dangerous big spiders
Legit seeing my house spider is the best part of my day ♥️ spooder fren
You forgot Emus. We lost two wars to them.
"Now, when North Americans see a platypus, they all say the same thing."
*P E R R Y T H E P L A T Y P U S !?*
nop he has no hat
@@vanferuli3 a platypus?
@@cy7231 no a cat
In french it's called an ornithorynque, which is one of the funniest word in thr language attributed to a weird cross-over with beaver and a duck
Only if they seek off to fight really dumb villains.
"Stingrays, i haven't even said anything about them yet, and your already sad"
This hit me hard :(
I dont get this joke :(
@@kamenidriss Steve Irwin
I'm amazed there are people that didn't get the joke. They must either be a lost generation or they haven't yet seen a TV.
Guess which group are commenting on this video?
@@RealCadde Hey I'm just hearing about him for the first time too. And there are things my friends don't know that I thought is pretty universal
Theres a reason it ranks above crocodiles, if ya know what i mean
I as anxious about watching this one because I knew Huntsman Spider was gonna be on here but when I saw he was fading it in so we wouldn't get scared I almost cried. How thoughtful
same bruh
That was highly considerate of him. It's annoying how people rarely take arachnophobia in consideration even tho it's super common.
This is honestly one of my favorite UA-cam channels, it's up there in the top. Pure Grade Addictive, Funny, short and genius content.
He didn’t even talk about the emus they literally lost a war with them
He didn't talk about emus for the same reason American military don't talk about Vietnam
@@Dv0rak404 Ouchie
Yeah well, superchooks are bloody tough bastards!
I think he made a video about that already.......... actually I think that was Oversimplified
*white peace
Huntsman spiders are pretty dangerous when, like what happened to me, one emerges on the inside of your motorcycle helmet visor because it got too cold near the air vents at 120kph down the highway.
I didn't stack my bike, but I did set a Guinness world record forr fastest controlled dismount and dishelmeting record.
😂😂😭😭😭😭😭 SO MUCH NOPE. I nearly veered across the highway ditch into oncoming traffic one day because a jumping spider decided he wanted to drive me to work. If a Hu team came down INSIDE my motorcycle helmet against my face…well that’s why I don’t own a motorcycle or live in Australia.
I always check my helmet for this terrifying reason
@@crumblymunky Wow same thing happened to me with a bee I can't even imagine what would I do in that situation.
Exactly for situations like this I think spontaneous death is an underrated superpower. No way in fuck am I going to deal with that situation and live with the trauma, I’d rather just die on the spot
@@TheDonutMan3000 @Moritz R Well when such thing happens to you, you become a stunt rider instantly and you go 140 to 0 in 0.1 seconds with a stoppie then you break the helmet taking off record as well, at least i know i did.
Someone edgy: “Death is my middle name”
Death adder snake: “Amateur”
@My penis is very small. Lol when people reply to you they have to admit how small their penis is with proper punctuation.
Whoopsy
Quake Jake *wHooPS!*
The life subtractor thing was so good
@@WakeNBakeBro 👀
LMFAO DUDE THE HUNSTMAN SPIDER "I'm fading it in so you don't get scared" HAHAHA
As an Australian I can confirm trees are really dangerous for many reasons:
-They easily fall and kill people
-Always on fire
-As they are on fire, they limit a character’s ability to see more than 50m away
They also fucking explode occasionally
you mean really* not rarely
ANZACxLAG basically biological oil barrels
@@danielwang2795 basically a living and growing bonfire
Camping rule No.1 in australia is to never camp under a gum tree because every australian gum tree follows murphys law and WILL fall on your tent. Also gumtrees were the cause of the first ever recorded fire tornado in my home town so pretty cool (hot actually) ey?
Casually explained: stingrays
Everyone: why you gonna hurt us like that
This is way too low, or the average audience is too young to understand
I knew what was coming and still was sad
please explain
@@abelton20 Steve Irwin (a beloved Aussie wildlife conservationist and nature tv presenter) was killed by a stingray
@@abelton20 he's basically considered a Aussie legend
Correction: Americans look at a platypus and go “Where’s Perry?”
damn straight
There's* Perry
@@tortor2883 no it's usually "where's perry" lmao
@@spooktspeek uhh you didn't get it mate
He is saying like phineas saw perry
@@staroboom4880 you sure lad
usually i get these things....
guess i'm jus stoopid lmao
I know you didn't put anything in F-tier as a joke, but I think budgies and bearded dragons definitely belong there (along with the iconic quokka, because come on, how can you say to that smile?)
For a decade I kept two budgies (one blue/white, one yellow) named Elvis and Presley, and while they couldn't talk (though I've tried getting them to many times), they loved kissing my fingers, flying around in our apartment (including at the top of kitchen cabinets by cookie jars and all we'd see is them looking down at us when we enter), and people/wildlife watching from the windows. My blue budgie in particular loved trying to camouflage with the curtains and the window trims since the curtains were blue and the window trim paint was white. I've kept a beardie named Frank (after Frank Lloyd Wright; my favorite architect) since 2013 and he's the most chill lizard I've ever come cross. Never bites, love to climb onto me, and when I pet him, he makes the cutest grin. However, beardies get a few points deducted for one biting Steve Irwin in the nose
Another mention for F: The rhinoceros roach, the world's heaviest roach and it is native to Queensland. While people think roaches are pests, the vast majority of them actually aren't. This includes the rhinoceros roach. Completely harmless, they don't even have wings, they're kept as pets in their native country, and they help the ecosystem by consuming dead eucalyptus leaves and recycling other matter
Yeah, that's just what Quokka wants you to think of them.
quokkas hurl their babies when encountering a predator, then run away.
"Be very wary if they seem to have something in their pouch because it's probably a Glock." Can confirm, I've sold many Glocks to Kangaroos in my lifetime.
Ladies and gentlemen, we got him
Glock more like c😂ck
@@vyws Have you ever heard of the famous Scottish festivity, Glockencock?
how much ????
Stop doing that guy.
Top tier better be the Australian Magpie otherwise it doesn’t count :p
My area has friendly magpies
Your Mate Tom nooo! Magpies are cute. I feed they in my backyard. Magpies can share meal with other small birds, but Ravens don’t. Ravens always bully other birds.
@@FearlessMagpie Jaguars are cute too, doesn’t mean they’re not dangerous lol.
It's the Ibis.
I have been swooped over a dozen times in the past week. Scariest shit I ever see.
“When I was growing up in Tasmania...”
That explains a lot.
The inbred capitol of australia
Lmao
We all love to bash on tassie
Is Tasmania the Alabama of Australia?
@@johnyrocket0015 Yarp... Less so though.
Compared to Alabama, where it's truely believed even around the world, it's more just a jab at Tasmania than anything,
all countries have the place that's made fun of. However it is still believed by some, as all stereotypes are.
Thank you so much for making the spider pictures either indistinct or non-existent. You saved me from minutes of skin crawl and hyper awareness.
“Now when North Americans see a platypus they all say the same thing...”
Perry the platypus?
“...heh beaver go quack”
Oh.
I dont even watch that show, and that's the first thing I thought of
"A Tier: Will Kill You"
*Ad Plays*
"Hi, I'm a Verizon engineer"
Ublock Origin, thank me later.
same ad bro xD killed me
UA-cam Premium user: “is this a joke I’m too rich to understand?”
Coronavirus is no joke
Mine played the air force😭😭
"Thankfully there are no snakes where I live. Because I live in a house."
I don't know why, but that was hilarious
The fact he didn’t mention how scorpions would survive an entire week in water just blew my mind even 2 years later
Kangaroos have a top speed of 70km/h. Even the strong won't make it.
And can clear fences over 8 feet high in a single leap.
The strong will fight and take with them as many as possible.
"the trees are literally made of oil"
*American has entered the chat*
aussies also have strict gun laws
How can my man bring up trees that want to kill you without mentioning the Gympie-Gympie; the tree that drives people to suicide ?!
JackFrostNCola oo
well time to bring freedom and democracy to these brits, i mean aussies
Why do you think california is on fire? They imported eucalyptus trees to use as railway sleepers and now they burn every year
“When beavers look at a body of running water and think.... stop”.
I was expecting “Damn”.
Rachaun Holland me too!
i think supressing our expections was the joke
I laughed way too hard at the death adder > life substractor joke
Eucalyptus trees will also NOT hesitate to drop a branch on your head so if you're going camping don't put your tent underneath one I'm not joking
Or on your car, or on you having a picnic under one. Avoid.
And on my roof, my fence, and my Hills hoist. I had 8 around my house in Port Augusta, planted by an idiot, and after 10 years of guerilla dropping, Housing Trust finally lopped them
Why the hell would you ever go camping in Australia !
hence why they are called widow makers
they also like to combust when it gets too hot and start fires
Here in Italy, if you lie on a meadow, the worst it can happen to you is getting a tick stuck to an uncomfortable place.
In Australia you can die several painful deaths by several different animals. Or suffer immensely because of non deadly but painful bites.
Paralysis tick and Shellback are deadly. some have lime disease that will affect you for life. Bush tick are annoying but when they are young not so bad. As a kid I went rolling in the bush and ended up head to toe. After a tea tree bath there was over 300 of the little suckers on the bottom of the bath like a silt layer.
@@cloudcretang2920 In the north west, at the border with Austria, ticks appear to be infected with encephalitis but it seems you don't get it if you manage to remove the tick in the first few hours. Don't know why.
That said, I hate ticks with a passion, useless nasty critters...
when i was younger, we went on a holiday to the coast with some friends who brought their dog. The dog got a tick and died 2 weeks later :(
As a Canadian, tick = Lyme disease or if you're really unlucky (and in the west) Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever.
Isn't Australia one of those places where people shake their clothes after coming back home to make sure there are no insects on them?
“Just another weird guy at the beach peeing on his daughters leg-“ I think humans should go higher on the list
6:38 this might lead to a misunderstanding. It doesn't like Vegemite in the way that it becomes more aggressive, it hates it as in it won't go near anyone who has had Vegemite within the last 24 hours. This also pairs with its ability to target non-australian accents as a way to kill tourists.
Yeah I visited Australia as a tourist, we had all eaten Vegemite except for my longer brother, who refused saying it was nasty. One of them attacked him and killed him. I miss you every day, John.
Bonus points if you wear some toothpaste for extra safety
“The trees are made of Oil”
America: “SOMEONE SAY OIL”?!
Would explain why there are so many gum trees in the us, and thus why there are so many fires.:p
Don’t do it John, the Viet Cong are trying to lure us. Here have this napalm
I mean there's a USMC rotational force up at darwin so I'm guessing the invasion has already started
Oh yeah fire time bois
America: is for me?
As an Australian, can confirm trampolines are one of the most deadly animals in Australia.
Edit: Thanks for the likes, it would mean a lot if just 1 person checked out my daily jokes :)
Boink!
I've broken my arm 4 times because of it.
I got a hole through my thigh falling through the side where the nails and screws stick out by the springs
FunFact: It wasn't the Stingray who killed Steve, it was Steve who killed Steve, first by invading the Stingray's space, and then Steve killed himself by pulling out the stinger after catching it in the chest. Another fellah got stun through the heart and they left it in to come out naturally without doing more damage to the heart and he's just fine now. If Steve woulda just left it in... anyhoo.
I have broken multiple bones from that shot square trampoline lmao
Absolutely gobsmacked that not only were magpies not included at all, but that they weren't S tier. I fear for my life on a daily basis at their hands (or should i saw claws)
He's from Tasmania, I need a Tasmanian to respond and clarify if they swoop there too
Australians with the majority of the deadly animals : I sleep
Australians seeing a magpie : REAL SHIT ?!
@@UntoldHistoryAnimations ACTUALLY THOUGH :')
@@pirahna0145 Launceston native bro, magpies are pretty much only attracted to bogan cunts and rarly swoop as much as they do in places like QL
Plovers though, swoopy fucks can and WILL ruin your bbq pretty bloody quick
@@littlesmallhugebigguy i see and ty for responding
"Hey Fred."
Fred,
The Steve Irwin joke actually hurt
He predicted my emotions perfectly. I was sad
I watched his show every week when he was alive and I was a little kid. Was literally a huge part of my childhood and to this day I can remember the commercials paying tribute to him. I cried for days and I hated sting rays passionately for a while.
I like how he never mentioned it nor implied it killed Irwin but we all already thought of it
Keep on rocking in heaven, steve irwin
I’ll teach my children about what sting rays have done
This beef is generational
Ever since he died the world has been on a constant decline. Are stingrays the Illuminati? Prolly
What did stingrays do?
@@Vador-ft5xo they killed Steve Irwin
Crystal so Steve knew every time that he picked up an animal it would try to kill him. Sting rays are no different. Sting rays are honestly awesome. This just shows how dangerous all animals are not to handle them unless a professional.
Classy Kermit • 69 Years Ago yea but that’s no reason to keep hating on stingrays.
“When North Americans See aPlatypus they all say the same thing”
Me: PERRY THE PLATYPUS
Only if it's lookin' real sharp in a 1940s fedora.
Damn..
Same
dubidubiduba perrryyyy
Agent p!
I lived in Australia for three years. We had funnel spiders on our patio, but we ignored each other. NBD. The worst, though, was the *Telstra.* It hunts you down where ever you go, and when you least expect it, refuses to allow you to keep your old phone number when you get a new phone. Worse, it will then send its horrifying double edged bill to destroy you, by charging you for both phones simultaneously.
Thank the Lord I moved back to the US, where I can at least dump AT&T into the ocean when I want.
My favourite once a month 5 minutes of fun.
DJ Akademiks Supreme Hoodie
How much of that 15 minutes is spent crying?
Sir Apple 14 minutes 😭😭
When he said “ then I get them with my spin move” why did that immediately remind me of videogamedunkey
it did2me2
I knew it was familiar, but forgot why. Thank you for reminding me!
@@Mythis1 super tornado slam
@@Emily12471 spaghetti paunch
@@robertmcdowell6084 PASTA POWAH
"Crocodiles are the venus fly traps of reptiles"
This one resonated with me on a primal level
Life subtractor joke may be his BEST joke ever on youtube. Never laughed this much. Totally unexpected.
can’t believe you didn’t mention that a crocs “spin move” is quite literally called the death roll
Awwww
It's a videogamedunky reference.
@@poogle9368 What?
@@dkt5992 there's a UA-camr called videogamedunkey who has a spin move meme. It started when he was doing league of legends but he still occasionally sneaks a spin move reference into his video. The meme was that, in league there was some dumbass character that could do this BS op spin or something and just get himself out of any situation.
@@poogle9368 I mean its actually called the death roll if not by scientist most people do use it dunno about the youtuber tho might look
Clearly forgetting the most dangerous and terrifying creature of all...
Magpies.
Bobby J Yeah but we have those in Canada too
True. Those things are scary as hell
@@dracoexeltior7353 the Australian magpie is on a whole other level, mate.
O fuck it is spring now
They are literally suicide bombers
A guy from Tassie who's successful? So there is hope
Good to know webbed feet don't hold you back
@Oskar Hansson Successful? That is debatable.
Double the heads, double the thinking power
I knew he was from Tassie because of the jack jumpers. I've lived all over the mainland and never seen a jack jumper outside of Tassie. Also I love how to be a successful Tasmanian all you need to do is leave...
@TheLindo98 don't forget Ricky Ponting
Never run over a wombat. You'll fuck up your car, it'll probably flip over, and now you've got a pissed off wombat outside.
"So first off in the F tier we have all the animals that are actually nice and completely harmless...so next in the E tier" 😂😂
*sad quoka noises*, literally the only non deadly, cute animal in australia. let's ignore the fact that they are native to a smaller island with zero natural predators so they never developed a fear instict so they are extremely friendly with humans,
I mean, tbh the only danger that possums posses is the terrifying noises they make but they do fall on cars when they get electrocuted on the power lines so maybe that counts for danger factor
@@peepeetrain8755 i looked it up, AND IT LOOKS SO CUTEEEE!!!!
@@peepeetrain8755 Also Bilbies and a few of our other smaller insectivores.
@@peepeetrain8755 Bearded dragons are nice if you tame them properly. Used two own two of them, but they sadly passed away from cancer. Very affectionate lizards
Along with constantly being on fire, you failed to mention that eucalyptus trees have a tendency to decide they're tired of their branches and randomly just hurl them at cars and unsuspecting people camping.
and that the fire will literally make them explode into burning shrapnel of sticky doom
The scary thing about this video is that although everything he said is true, there are still things he missed.
The Cassowary: a 6ft chicken that has a claw so sharp it will rip your heart out with one kick.
The Stinging Bush AKA The Suicide Plant: This innocuous looking fern is covered in thousands of tiny hairs that, when lightly touched, deliver a neurotoxin in to your body. The hairs get lodged in your skin and often leave an open pathway straight to your nerve which becomes incredibly painful when touched by wind or water. The agonising pain can last months if untreated, leading to people choosing death as the easier option - thus being dubbed the suicide plant.
The Redback Spider: Well known to be one of only a few venomous spiders in the world. This tiny spider is only around 3mm long but has a penchant for residing in large cities which often brings it in close contact with a large population base. Although an effective antivenom now exists, if left untreated a bite from this spider will often lead to death.
The Magpie (added by popular demand): I kid you not, the magpie is a fucker. This bird is common around the world, but for some reason the magpies in Australia are particularly teritorial and will attack anyone found cycling or running near their nest. A common defence many Australians have taken to deploying is the use of cable ties on their bike helmet (Google: cable tie bike helmet) to deter the Magpies from swooping. Yes, this is 100% normal. In September 2019, a 76-year old man was killed by a swooping Magpie that made him crash his bike. These are no joke.
The Puffer Fish: Although not native to Australia, this fish is commonly found along the shores of the more tropical regions such as Northern Queensland, Northern Territory and Western Australia. They contain a neurotoxin which is up to 1,200 times more poisonous than cyanide, with enough toxin in one fish to kill 30 adult humans. Oh, and did I mention no known antidote currently exists?
The Bull Shark: They don't receive as much attention as their cousin The Great White, but the bull shark is actually a lot more feared among Australian citizens. The Bull Shark is notoriously aggressive and, unlike the great white that tends to only attack humans by accident, the bull shark hunts humans for sport. They can reside in shallow coastal waters and often swim up to 100 km inland via rivers making swimming in rivers dangerous, even in the parts where crocodiles don't frequent.
Textile Cone Snail: This snail grows up to 15cm in length - but don't let its diminutive size fool you. The Textile Cone Snail contains enough venom to kill up to 60 human adults, and their venom-injecting tooth is sharp enough to penetrate gloves AND wetsuits.
6 foot chicken sounds scary
@@goatman9894 It is, although it is quite rare.
I’m Australian, I thought most spiders were venomous?
And red backs live in my backyard, they’re normal and I’ve never been bitten
@@peppercornowl1182 Most Spiders are non-venomous a few are poisonous but a red back stores "Venom".
You forgot about the most dangerous thing, the thing that can successfully wage war on all human kind... *The Emu*
You know a person’s an Aussie when they say: “AHH! A HUNTSMAN! Oh wait, it’s only a huntsman
Been living in the bush for 20 years, I’ll still scream bloody murder and promptly destroy the thing if it exists near me, same goes for every other spider/snake. Fuck those guys.
"The trees are literally made of oil."
USA: Let's bring them democracy
They could actually use some lol.
The CIA already deposed our Prime Minister in the 70s. We're good thanks
We actually have more democracy than you lot tbh. Everyone votes and there's no fucken stupid electoral college.
@@chellybub while technically not wrong, I'm no fan of mob rule, but you do you.
@@chellybub ok do you even know what electoral college is?
North Americans say "haha beaver go quack"
Me, an American: "He's a semiaquatic egg-laying mammal of action!"
Doobie Doobie dooba do doobie doobie dooba
He's got more tjan just plain skill!
He's got a beaver tail and a bill.
An Iron-will, nerves of steel, and several other metal-themes attributes...
His fur is water-tight,
And he's always up for a fight!
and the women swoon whenever they him say
>"I haven't said anything about them, and you're already sad"
Right in the feels, bruh.
Casually Explained: Even the trees are dangerous
Vietnam veterans: *I KNEW IT*
The Sun being in S-tier makes perfect sense because as a wise man once said, the Sun is a deadly lazer. This also doesn't change the fact that the Australian flag is nothing more than a British reaction vid
remixed by New Zealand
Not any more there's a blanket!!!
I'm legally obligated to like your comment due to the bill wurtz reference.
That life subtractor joke is honestly one of the best you've done. Fucking hilarious!
I need an explanation, didn’t get it 😔
@@MapsaiLiv One common name for Aussie is "The land down under". Common joke is that everything is upside down or reversed from northern hemisphere. Therefore you get:
Death//Life Adder//Subtractor For Adder, think maths, "to add"
TL:DR It's a pun of sorts.
@@Damoinionit was actually a double entendre.
Tasmanian devil: "Look like cute miniature dogs and just like cute miniature dogs they are completely filled with evil."
Enter Sam O'nella video of dog breeds.
"AH! Oh it's just a huntsman" Is painfully accurate. It happens every single time.
Are they poisonous, because they seem pretty big.
@@silverdragon122 Not in the slightest, mild tolerable pain for about an hour then it goes away.
@@silverdragon122 the bigger the spider, the less poisonous it is, but the bite hurts more cause they have bigger fangs ofc
@@silverdragon122 Venomous and no not really, they're pretty much completely harmless. It's the redbacks that will give you a hard time despite being like 10% the size.
@Bob the Fish And they eat rats and mice, so, that's a plus...
I was expecting him to mention the emu and cassowary as well. Even the kangawallafox would have been a good addition.
Ok. "Life Subtractor'" is brilliant.
Anyone else pointed out he forgot the most formiddible animal yet?
- the emu
They don't talk about the emus.
Part of the post-war treaty they forced the Aussies to sign...
The emu isn’t an animal. It’s a demon
Not even mentioning the cassowary
Nah mate. Cassowaries. Emus with extra weapons.
Cassowary?
The Australian server is playing in hard mode.
Well the random encounters are the absolute worst, but the working actually isn’t too hard though the ping suuckks
African server is suicide difficulty.
you think we have servers in australia? fuck our internet is barely functioning.
we have to deal with all this shit and play on 400 ping
Dude turkey is on the economy crisys questline
They don't even have guns
For some reason my primary school in Australia never talked about the murderous wildlife. “Yeah jimmy go swim my with the poisonous platypus, not like it’s our job the educate you” so much one holiday my family went walking up a wombat trail completely unaware that we could be runned at any moment.
I've never lived in Australia, but I somehow immediately understood the pain behind the Telstra joke.
Yes, it's universal. Something that translates across cultural and language barriers.
can you explain it?
What is Telstra? Are they the Verizon down under?
@@indianawesomeness i think it's their internet provider, i only australians have shit internet cos of some of my australian friends themselves
Yes, they are an internet and mobile provider, notorious for bad customer support. Funnily enough, I think others are worse but Telstra is the best known and not that great anyway