Outsiders & Outcasts (For Those That Don't Belong)
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- Опубліковано 25 чер 2024
- From the moment we are born as human beings, the people around us prepare us to fit the herd. We start out as being part of a family, and then we expand our social life with friends, acquaintances, colleagues, and, in many cases, a significant other. People tend to work together and spend time with each other, and thus, they form a well-oiled machine called society.
Living among the herd has many benefits, like safety, security, access to other people including potential mates, and a shared identity that creates a sense of self. But in some cases, the herd doesn’t want you anymore, and you become an outcast. Or you don’t want the herd anymore, and you become a recluse. Or, perhaps, a little bit of both.
No matter what the reason is: some people just don’t seem to belong. And when you don’t belong, you’re an outsider; an outcast. So, how do we handle being an outsider? What about those that don't belong?
This video explores the fate of those outsiders and outcasts that live outside the herd.
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#loner #solitude #outsider
00:00 Intro
01:21 The outsider: choice or condemnation?
03:07 The herd versus solitude
05:07 Hermits & recluses
06:25 Wrap-up
The more I'm surrounded by people the more I feel alone.
I felt that
Really waste my time to listening all the rubbishy
💗
I know DAT fellin
I always say “I don’t feel lonely when I’m by myself, I feel lonely when I’m with a lot of people I don’t know.”
Since childhood, i always felt that i did not belong to any group. I'm always outside any group, even if i have a circle of friends it doesn't last long and mostly i choose outside.
I genuinely feel you
I’ve been an outcast since childhood I’m talked about there’s those people who try to approach me to see my “reaction” it’s impossible to make friends with anyone at my school they’re all in the same friend group
Same here!
That's why I'm watching this because I always felt this way
same dude but the thing that worries me more is if a friend fits in a certain group they are not the same anymore
One who looks outside, dreams. One who looks inside, awakens.
Carl Jung
Do both?
Who dreams outside? Look, that one. Which one doesn't wake inside?
-Me horribly misunderstanding Jung
@@Aklemvaeo I believe the answers are inside of us. To look outside of us is illusory.
@@sallyforth7232 Oh I agree! I was trying to bring a bit of absurd humour to it all! Such is my calling and curse!
I do really like Jung, your take on the ideas and the video.
I always feel that in times of strife, humour must always be present. I know, too, that it is not easily conveyed through efficient, yet bland text :)
@@Aklemvaeo 😂😂😂 I have this same dilemma. It doesn't seem as hilarious once you have to explain it.
Although I did observe your way of explaining it quite the unexpected punchline of that whole scenario. Thanks for the laughter in such an unexpected way.
Let's make a society of outsiders.
First meeting: No one shows up
Excellent.
Hilarious! You better have a sense of humor if you're going down this lonely road. Visit my chan you get a chance.
😂
Love it.
count me in. just start without me.
😄
For those who don't know, 'Einzelgänger' (German) means loner.
Thanks for telling :))
@@pixiedust0874 you welcome buddy
(no) Gang Gang!
Nice
'Alonegoer' is my humble translation
I never belonged anywhere, i thought it was weird. Glad to know I'm not alone.
sucks to be an outcast, how do I overcome this
@@leilamshawarmaaa it doesn't suck at all n believe me you are very lucky
You must know that you are alone.
One of my lovely daughters said, "Mom, where are we going to bury you? You don't really belong any where! I smiled and suggested that they scatter me over a mountain meadow from a hot air balloon ...I kinda hope they cremate me first. 😳
The irony of that statement...😂
The freedom to make my own mistakes was all I ever wanted.
"There is no greater freedom than the freedom to err" -Mahatma Gandhi
Yeah me too
Are you saying that you no longer want, or that you wanted and still do, or it was something you wanted which was denied you, or is this commentary on COVID? Or, do you mean by acts inflicted upon you you were forcibly prevented, or by way of chiding or shaming or emotional abandonment you were threatened... what do you mean. I do not pretend to have mastered the art of assumption and subsequently having been exposed to a wide variety of people am clueless as to exactly what that means when you say it, I’m so curious
Yeah i know: Mance Raider, Game of Thrones.
Lucky you, that you were born into this world then.
I was pushed away, I was pushed away over and over and over again. There comes a point when you are pushed away and ignored so much that you just stop trying to even get a simple hello.
It's better, to rule your own spirit than to rule a city.
I like it 👍
But what is it like to rule both? Then again one cannot serve two masters
@@mjolninja9358 yet, isn't that the line which the introverted/extrovert considered to be walking to some extent🤔? Serving two masters? Serious observation and question...
Lao Tzu
@Matt and Self is reached
“Do not EVER let anyone make you feel like you DON’T MATTER.” 🙌🏽
But what if they are right?
Remember that you are unique.
Just like everyone else.
Sorry. Old joke. ❄️
@@sunnysal3889 i remember once when ppl used snowflake as something insulting. It kind of amused me. Bc snowflakes really are built differently. I remember having to explain to someone what that meant to me.
When Frank Sinatra sang "you're nobody unless somebody loves you", my dad said: "what a beautiful song"
Then again, he also believed in the existence of a religious Deitiy, so I didn't trust his judgement.
@@path4318 not that I'm arguing with your statement, but I'm a nillhist, and when I can't find any meaning, I wonder if anything matters.
I feel severely disconnected from human society. I have nothing in common with them.
I've lived as an outsider my entire life. Even in childhood it seemed as I couldn't connect with people of my age easily. All my friends and cousins, they all seemed to fit into the system of family really well and I thought that there was something wrong with me. I have no close relationship with either of my parents or any other grown ups. When I try to talk about something openly people accuse me of being a radical intentionally trying rebel to make others uncomfortable. My mother said my thought process is weird and twisted. It is hard to survive in environments that actively discouraged critical thinking. Even in school I had very few close friends. I used to spend hours trying to explain myself to others. Now everything is alright. I no longer take the effort to explain anything and I'm OK with being misunderstood. Now I know that there are others suffering the same internal conflict like me, it doesn't seem so alone.
Agree. Very few places encourages critical thinking
Yeah I'm the same exact way, everytime I try opening up to my parents, I just get shut down immediately. Even like whenever I try to explain things to some people, I'll sometimes get them looking at me funny. Or they wouldn't even know what to say.
I feel the same sometimes we aren’t born into where we belong and that’s not always a bad thing we would probably hate to fit in somehow with them with the way we think and see things more introspectively
I enjoy being a loner, it's the best thing to have solitude.
When you think about it it's impossible to be around people because being around leads to too many obligations on how to act and how to think
The worst part about people going into madness is that it can easily be prevented if someone went out of their way to show simple acts of kindness such as asking about their day or being there for them
The people with no freinds or barely any freinds have the most unique personalities and when I talk to them they seem to do very adventurous life's . Personally I love being alone times I feel disappointed in people but I try to remind myself it's ok to be the outcast
Being alone has a power that very few people can handle
A bird that flies alone has the strongest wings
Wow.. what a Insight.
In fact most lonely people can't even handle it either.
@@slr-dthey’re not naturally an introvert my advice is learn to communicate and get along with people but alway get out and go back to society once in a while u are not meant to be there for a long time u will hurt urself
@@slr-d i handle well since my childhood im introvert for me its normal.
I think what saved me from my lifetime of black sheep syndrome was heavily lowering my expectations of everyone and to stop giving of myself so freely. I have been preyed upon by a lot of cheats, gossips and selfish prats and gotten hurt trying to be their friends. Now I take care with who gets to sit at my table. I let people come to me and I expect nothing of them so I am not disspointed if I need to show them the door.
That's sad. I'm sorry you have to trudge through your life in this way.
Here I am at university, 4 months in no friends, havent attended a single party, I find it difficult to relate to the drama of college life and thus I have become an outsider, cut off from the herd, but also blessed with the oppurtunity to discover myself in solitude...
Hey, good luck.
ify
“Many outsiders have a deep concern for humanity.” I can totally relate to this.
I myself have never followed the herd mentality and I’ve always been more than happy about it. There is no need to suffer from not belonging to the herd, on the contrary you might even develop an intuitive sense of superiority.
Looking from the outside gives you an unique and unbiased perspective
I would say getting a feeling of superiority is not a good thing either. For example,I don't watch tv, netflix,etc,simply not interested,but I do know people who (allegedly)don't either,and act like that makes them a better person then people who do. I don't think that is a very good way to be,either.
@@thehighpriestess978
You are absolutely right, Ziegfeldgirl! I hate arrogant people. But I just don’t see any gain in watching Netflix or any „must have seen“ series only because everybody does.
Thank you for saying this! We can all use some humbling once in a while:) I feel at times I have felt that superiority, out of anger that came from feeling that the people in the herd, had something that I lacked, and were more superior than I was. I’ve caught myself though, I know that I’m no better than anyone else, and vise versa
Well said 🙌🏼
I've been an outsider my whole life. The older I get, the more I like it.
"The Path To Greatness Is Through Non Conformity."
- Me
Love this
Now we just have to figure out how to beat the paradox of conforming to a non-conformist viewpoint.
@@kylemurphy9696 exactly
A Path. 😁
Hahaha
I can never have true friends at school, I just love being near nature and silence. i wonder why I watched this backwards, my soltitude led me to beautiful places people of my town never knew existed, like the quiet wall behind the church surrounded by beautiful flowers, undisturbed silence of old school buildings, the kind evening air of the cemetery. Lots of it builds up into one mysterious destiny.
It's difficult when you learn you're one who needs to walk a solitary road.
Yeah for some people it just occurs to them one day, especially if they had some sort of illusion of social acceptance before
Go with it...it’s the correct road.
Especially with no family there, I was attempted to be moulded to conformity. Why. All I wanted is to be loved. I think that path has come knocking.
Yes it is .. but it is a road worth walking .. there is short term pain..
Lol
I suddenly had a breakdown, i was thinking about my classmates(i'm in my teen years) and how i had to switch schools, because i didn't fit in. But guess what? I didnt fit in second school either. I came to realise that you can't always fit in society, and that's okay. Watching this video made me feel very good as an outcast and i will try not to whine about being "lonely". I have family members, 3-4 friends that i trust and i should be grateful for that. I don't have active life, like some teens I know my age, but now I see that I'm not the only one and i feel better.
Thank you for this video
Been through a lot in my life and still young. I’ve kept my distance because it seems most people, at least around my age, tend to make bad choices or seem very shallow. They have to learn for themselves. Been let down and hurt a lot but instead of being bitter when something goes wrong I want to help by being a humanitarian : )
Your on a different path to your peers .. keep being you .. stay true to that .. you will build a great life
You are an inspiring soul. As a mother of two beautiful outsiders I am impressed by your insight. You know yourself well and sound like an old soul.
The rewards are in the struggle. Those who make bad choices build great resilience.
Well said..good attitude..
Warmed my heart to see this. Took this goofy old man a very long time to finally develop these same feelings. Visit me here if you can, you will find you're not alone. Stay strong friends.
I’m in 8th grade right now and literally everyone dislikes me for no reason. When I ask them why they say “because you are you”. And everybody does it. My only friend is my little brother and I love him very much. I try to be my best for him because I’m his big brother. I have tried to keep my chin up but it’s not easy. And my grandfather just passed away. It’s just a lonely painful world. But I never tell my parents about this because I wouldn’t want them to know their child is suffering. Guys just remember one thing: think about being in someone else’s shoes before you do something. Maybe being alone is just better for me
School is hard. People can be so mean and uncaring. Especially when they gang up on someone in order to be part of the group.
Most of them are so afraid of being excluded themselves, they'll follow the bullying of someone else - just to avoid it happening to THEM.
Sad, I know. 😕
You sound a really lovely person! Look after your little brother.
I always wished I had a brother to look after me. 😊
Sending you a big hug! ❤️
Edit: So sorry to hear about your grandad. Also maybe you could confide in your parents or a counsellor?
Take care. 🫶
Thank you so much it helps to know that there is someone who cares I wish you safe and happy holidays ❤️
We were born to explore life. That's the reason why people make rules yet they don't follow them. Human nature craves freedom.
Exactly! Love this
Wonderful .. freedom along with doing what is right ..
Spontaneous order that occurs in freedom. Hayek would agree.
Amen sister!
@CactusHeart79 what freedom has to do with anything related to that topic. I'm a "leftist" and I don't agree with what you said that "we" feel is better for society. It just looks like you want to look clever, but in reality, you're just acting as if a group of people is homogeneous. You're straight out lying. I would say "rightists" love "freedom" when it's about males and white people, but love to kill and would love to see a society where women were just puppets. You see? You're just being a sheep and pathetic.
I feel like I m becoming a misanthrope, and at the same time I felt so much empathy for Humanity
I'm already there
I am an outsider, and as a result, I've learned to value my freedom.
Anyone who is younger (I am 61)... Stay true to yourself! I spent far too many years trying to "fit in" and I had to drink alcohol those years in order to cope. In hindsight I kind of wish I had just stood up for myself and my beliefs.
100% I often feel like I would fit in better in my sports group if I’d just drink like everybody else does. I see all the other guys drinking and wonder if they are just doing that for the self or only to be confirm. I stopped drinking this year but I feel how I stick out. This just adds to my other parts of non conformity. Where do you get to socialize?
I have autism. Because of this, I have been an outcast my whole life as well as a scapegoat.
It pains you sometimes to see others communicate well and have fun while you are alone and are around people who make you feel alone.
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I'll meet you there. ~ Rumi
SEE YOU THERE ♾
Zo Valentine : I just love, love, love, love this saying from Rumi. :-D
Switch off the expectations of "how things, Yourself & people should be are SUPOSED to be switch" sets you Free
He was refering about God - the source of good and evil and who is outside these two parameters.
And meet you there as in the Qur'an: Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un
That means - "Verily we belong to Allah (God), and verily to Him do we return."
“For ages you have come and gone
courting this delusion.
For ages you have run from the pain
and forfeited the ecstasy.
So come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
Although you appear in earthly form
Your essence is pure Consciousness.
You are the fearless guardian
of Divine Light.
So come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
When you lose all sense of self
the bonds of a thousand chains will vanish.
Lose yourself completely,
Return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
You descended from Adam, by the pure Word of God,
but you turned your sight
to the empty show of this world.
Alas, how can you be satisfied with so little?
So come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
Why are you so enchanted by this world
when a mine of gold lies within you?
Open your eyes and come ---
Return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
You were born from the rays of God's Majesty
when the stars were in their perfect place.
How long will you suffer from the blows
of a nonexistent hand?
So come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
You are a ruby encased in granite.
How long will you decieve Us with this outer show?
O friend, We can see the truth in your eyes!
So come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
After one moment with that glorious Friend
you became loving, radiant, and ecstatic.
Your eyes were sweet and full of fire.
Come, return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
Shams-e Tabriz, the King of the Tavern
has handed you an eternal cup,
And God in all His glory is pouring the drink.
So come! Drink!
Return to the root of the root
of your own soul.
Soul of all souls, life of all life - you are That.
Seen and unseen, moving and unmoving - you are That.
The road that leads to the City is endless;
Go without head and feet
and you'll already be there.
What else could you be? - you are That.”
― Mawlana Jalal-al-Din Rumi
The outcast that got rejected love deep because they know what it like to not have love and compassion from others
Ver y true. Thats one of my biggest problems. My world ain’t loving as I am, i love hard because I do know the feeling of otherwise not belonging and not mattering.
That's very true and I always find myself to being disappointed every time that love isn't reciprocated. I don't know why I even bother? Even though it's just pointless for me at this point.
It’s a lot easier to have a universal love for humans when you have enough distance from the constant disappointment that is humanity. Every time I interact or observe another person, it lowers my expectations lower than I ever could have imagined.
Real humble outlook. That comparison thing is on point. Clearly ppl must instigate tons of bs with you instead.
I only think im above certain ppl. Dont give me anything to go off of then. Otherwise, idek alot of ppl to compare myself to ... 🙄. "Dont start no sh wont be none" is what i go by
A very profound and interesting comment
So profound
"Where we don't belong, they cannot obligate us to stay."
It is a weird feeling when you don't feel like you belong yet your connected.
That hit home. Mr. Square peg in a round hole world. Never really belonging, always trying to fit in, that was my life. Only now in my late 60’s am I ok with being alone, content with myself. Great video, thank you 🙏🏻
Thank you for your honesty and sharing that. You are kind and that has added 10 years back to my life. I was starting to think: "I should be okay with me by now and ...I AM"
When you stop trying to fit in then you become your own man. I'm in my seventies and glad I don't have to compromise myself for anyone else.
The pattern I’ve seen within my life is enough to convince me that I wasn’t ever meant to fit in, family, work, relationships and so called pals have never been solid in my entire life and I’m ok with that, it is pretty comforting to see I’m not the only one, looking at the comments I can see myself in all of them. Thanks for sharing this brother 🤙🏽
Outsider artist here. It's far more fun to create realities than live among these illusions. If we are aware that we are manifesting our reality, that's a very subtle matter. Less distractions=progress
Exactly. A lot of people have no idea how much joy comes from creating something, something that comes from deep inside of you.
Agreed :)
Hi nice to meet you
I grew up with a narcissistic mother, narcissistic enabler father and a narcissistic golden child (older) sister. I have been the quiet, try-to-stay-out-of-everybody's-way scapegoat my whole life. My family members have always treated me like a play toy or a lab rat in that they have always made me available to be kicked around, tricked, relentlessly teased, lied to, lied about and withheld love and compassion whenever they needed a sadistic rush. I am older now and am afraid my sister and her husband are going to have me killed. I would give just about anything to simply be alone and able to breathe freely, than continue to live this isolated and targeted life that I have been forced to live from day one.
I've always been an outsider, mostly due to my life experiences and some innate preferences. It used to cause great distress, but now, I'm not afraid to be alone. Strangely, as I've come to accept this, this is the time in which I've experienced the most amount of people wanting to be in my company.
This describes my life 😃 good to know I’m not alone. I feel more freer than ever since finding my middle way.
I feel a lot of pressure the more I'm surrounded by people
Being alone is better for me because I can relax and be whoever I want to be
Exactly cause around people you have to be performative and live up to their standards of you to keep their company, not to mention maintain a social status with them (work, job, ambitions). There's a lot of people pleasing which means a lot of masquerading and mask wearing. It seems you can never really be yourself
I want to say there is no one who can't belong somewhere on the Internet. There is always a community which exists where you fit perfectly and can provide value. You just need to find it.
I never socialized with the people who held similar views on any of my topics, even if I interacted with them sometimes.
@@Ermanariks_til_Aujm
Hey we're might have similar interests.
@@iliveinsideyourhouse3943 Of course, but as I said, I never end up socializing with those whom I share interest with - a thing from my side.
@@Ermanariks_til_Aujm
What is your interests anyway?
I am increasingly the opposite of that. I am finding more of a deepening divide between me and the internet, especially social media. More arguing and name calling by complete strangers who are somehow experts on me and just about any current topic I am interested in. The rest of what's available on the internet constantly challenges me to try to understand the hidden agendas. Who is funded by this or that? What are they trying to sell me, or worse, who is trying to brainwash me with sublime bias and why? Who's pocket is being lined by this or that information being given? I recently dropped my cell phone service because I had to have internet on it and I was on it all the time. I would spend hours face down on it. Now I enjoy the freedom of clearer thinking, watching the seasons change and nature which is much more entertaining. Yes, I am here because I still use a computer at home. However, I am forming some new ideas about how I will continue, or not, to utilize the internet as part of a New Year Resolution plan. This is because I find it disruptive in my home as well. I could go to library and use it there on a timed as needed basis only.
I offer others the dignity to have their idiosyncrasies, but am not afforded that dignity in return.
you are a genuine outsider... and yes, sometimes it is painful...
We can't expect that from the "normies"
I found a work environment (finally) that allows me to be myself and find me invaluable even with my idiosyncrasies 👍😁 -I do hope you find the same💙
@@surfside75 nice
Right. We're usually the ones who don't judge and understand people are different and even if it does not amuse me, they have that right.
But in return, we are judged and humiliated.
It was Krishnamurti who said that it is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society. This society s profoundly sick. I find myself moving further and further away from what people call normal in todays world. I am so pleased I found Ki Gong, meditation and sound healing. These have helped me find a more profound reality than the one offered by society. So I really agree with what you have put together here. It is sometimes that solitude that will help you find the deeper answers, and therefore putting you in the position to be able to give greater gifts to human beings and the world. These are all facinating concepts and the more I delve into them, the more I become happier. I do miss the parties and lots of people being around me, which is what I used to live like as a professional gigging musician, but that had its time and these are different times. Thanks so much for your channel. I love your videos. Have a great day. :)
I’ve lived an outcast all my life. Society has abandoned me
I do need interaction with my friends but I keep my circle small these days and I appreciate solitude more as I grow older. Being around people exhausts me sometimes.
"....by moving away from the world, they gained the world."....brilliant
Having spent virtually the entirety of my life in complete isolation I find myself encouraged by these little signs of evidence (Like this video) That although I may be alone, I am in fact surrounded by those who are just like me.
Come on over and visit, just a silly old man that knows a lil about these issues first hand. You are not alone friend.
@@TheBlackSheepDiaries Hah! The universe never fails to show up at just the right moment! Thank you for the invite. I just watched your intro vid, liked it. I regard my family as the real black sheep in this equation, but that is definitely not how the first 45 to 50 years played out. I have bookmarked your feed, look forward to learning about you!
@@TheBeteljuice Thank you for these kind words friend. Means the world. I'll be getting a new video up soon, been a very hectic last cpl months here. I had only just started trying to help folks with some tough life lessons learned the hard way when this crazy Rona hit. Kinda derailed the plan. I've tried to mix it up with some hobbies and terrible guitar playing so that it's not too boring and depressing. It's my day off today, and it sure is nice to make a new friend while trying to take it easy, like sunday mornin, great song!
And to think that for the longest I was cursed or something.
As a kid all I wanted was to belong somewhere, find my tribe. However, when I did I found drama, betrayal and lies. Not all was bad at times but I still felt alone even among a crowd of people I knew. When I decided to leave it was lonely at first but then I had more time for myself and my interests. I found more comfort by myself than with others who only cared about themselves and their well being. I found my own strength to keep moving forward on my own with support from my loved ones/family and started my journey on finding myself, my purpose in life
I feel like my whole life I've been an outsider, by my sophomore year in high school I stopped trying to fit in and seek the approval of others and started to enjoy my solitude. Now I'm in my first year of college and I'm starting to mature and look more physically attractive and yet deep down inside I still feel the resentment I had for the same people who rejected me who now accept me. I don't need their approval or acceptance anymore though.
I would like to know more about your journey because I am struggling with the same thing. I want to reach the place where you have reached , where I can finally be comfortable in my own skin and not give a fuck about other people. Right now I care too much and it literally kills me each moment
The dilemma becomes more complicated when the outsider ages into senior citizenhood. I'm just beginning to work on that.
Yeah. I've been thinking a lot about this too. I'm not that old but I don't have a lot of time left to have children. I don't know....
I am very much a loner (and infertile), which seems fine now, at almost 40, but I do wonder if at 65-70, say, I will find solitude difficult. When you say you are 'beginning to work on that', how do you mean, if I may ask?
I relate to that
@@rebecca7410 you wont Rebecca .. it is liberating .. i still connect with people .. but enjoy my solitude.. the key is to not engage too much with toxic people .. all the best
@@betterapproachtolife.motiv3265 Thank you for your reply. I am heartened to hear this. I enjoy solitude and reading mostly. It is a calm, content life.
Don't try to fit where you don't belong, find a place where you are irreplaceable! 💃
Why did you feel like you have to use this emoji 💃 ?
@@Farklu Because why not? lol
@@SY-sp8uo You shouldnt answer a question with another question. I just noticed that this emoji has nothing to do with your statement.
@@Farklu Who says you 'shouldn't' answer a question with a question?
@@Nitecrow314 Or that this emoji doesn't fit in? :D It's your opinion @Blaevy , noone cares and here is another shocking new - your opinion is not a fact and people can be different as well, your truth is not the only truth. Goodbye!
Many people judge me for how I live. I love my solitary life!
Ooksä suomalainen?
Why do you think they judge you, David?
@@dennismclaurin1487 I don't give a fuuuuuuuck!!!🤣
I can really relate to this video. When I was a child my teacher explained the word 'hermit' to the class. I developed a fear that I would grow up to be a hermit because I liked spending time on my own and would often refuse to go out and play with my friends when they called to my home. In secondary school I had few friends and so when I went to university I decided to try to make more of an effort with people. This backfired because the more popular I became the lonelier I felt and I knew that the person that people liked was not the real me. It wasn't until I left university that I found the balance and settled for having few friends, people who I didn't have to put on an act with and making more of an effort to maintain those friend
ships while still being content to spend time alone when I needed it.
Wow, I was just sitting here, watching City Slickers 1991 on my tv thinking, "dang, some of these people are dead. I'm getting old, I need to get some friends so I'm not a lonely old person." These smart phones, my night job, and lack of hobbies are keeping me too antisocial. I'm glad to see I'm not exactly doomed. Great video!!
Very often the problem is them, especially amongst the young. Not only will the least difference or weakness make you a target, but they really like the jerks in their peer group. This lasts through high school and beyond for many. Being on the outside makes all this clear.
This is the problem with underestimating ppl. Cue building shooters
Life is best experienced both alone and together. This is what I personally think. It's good to have lots of time for solitude. To have time to have your own thoughts and ideas form, without the taint of other's influence. Then it's good to also be together, experience life together and share it. To belong. And share your ideas, your own wisdom that formed in your own solitude. It's also good to hear the wisdom of other people, to discuss things. But not to take their ideas in without first questioning them yourself, but rather take them as possibilities of what can be.
Worst thing is being an outsider with a good conscience that makes you not to turn you into a criminal and living a fake life. Also not having enough money to live in in isolation and in need of a job.
I can honestly say your channel has improved my life a lot. I use to be violent & very toxic but, through therapy & channels like yours ive become a pretty confident & decent guy 😊 ty
In my experience some groups, herds, communities etc. Oftentimes tend to have a leader & become cliquey, gossipy, biased and before you know it turn almost cultish.
Being bullied and outcasted by my workmates made me so depressed and scared but it all let me see things from a distance which I did learn lot of things and learn to accept that no matter wat you do people will only judge and not be happy with wat u do anyways
I used to feel some duty to serve humanity and seek a useful purpose. I built my life around service. Then, after being kicked in the teeth more times than I can count, used like a rented mule, and seeing how unjust and vicious "society" is for no other reason than the sick thrill of cruelty, I realized an unconditional truth: taken as a whole, society is a vampire, your "fellow humans" are a gaggle of sniveling cannibals and conformity is a disease. There is no living with them that does not involve shame and constant damage. Get out from among them and their tribalist sacrifices and you may have some chance at happiness.
That’s how I feel too
Maybe you should find some kind and fair people?
Total truth spoken here.
I love this humans are a gaggle of evil cannibals
That was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read! ❤
Sometimes I feel like I dont fit even in my family, even in things I'm good at.
When I am with my group of friends talking I feel happy but also lonely.
But when I'm alone or I do things for myself like not needing help, I feel happy and comfortable.
Looking, observing society I feel like I don't fit. I feel or see a lot of individualism not teamwork, you know, like in the traffic jam we can apply a strategy to flow better but no one thinks of it, they just try to pass first even it that makes more traffic.
Even though we think we don’t belong, we do because we are part of this cosmos and cosmos is part of us. We may be different but we are all inter-connected. Knowing this gives a sense of peace and belonging. 🙏🏽
Energy
"you laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you're all the same"
👍
@@dennismclaurin1487 Best quote so far.
So if we are all outsiders walking a solitary path (myself included) then we are not really alone. We simply do not see our own kind very often. But not alone. There are always others out there who will understand you.
Great comment! I agree wholeheartedly ❤
Ps.68:6
The Suttas to Buddha gave are much more pragmatic than many people think - he gave countless great advice for regular folks!
Society will try to give you a role. That's only the case when you lack an identity and a sense of self-awareness.
It happens because we all need to belong somewhere. Decide where you want to belong or others will decide for you.
Damn thats deep
I've been alone for 4 years, I don't feel like I belong on this planet. I'd love to explore, get some money and meet people to change that.
What are you passionate about .. explore that .. and you will connect with others ..
@@betterapproachtolife.motiv3265 Business and being a stuntman, not many people my age into those two things haha but ty
You don't need money to explore
You belong. You have purpose. You have me. Namaste 🙏
@@manhattanvi excellent
Growing up I never innerstood why I was so different and because of that had been abused. Now as people start learning about consciousness and I too started learning about the awakening I found out that I have always been awake and that's why I was different. I spoke about concepts when I was young that even my mother's friends didn't innerstand. I remember when I was 5 years old getting in trouble because I told a neighbor girl that Santa did not exist. That Christmas was a lie. I asked my mom why her parents didn't want me to talk to her anymore for telling the truth when they were lying to her. When I was 8 I remember my uncle saying "Don't talk the way that you do if you want friends." I didn't take his advice and I've had very few friends throughout my life. It didn't feel good to me to be fake and to speak lies or talk about mundane things just so I could be accepted. Even my own mother and whole family hated me because I was different and I was an "embarrassment". All that did was teach me how to go within to find the love that I couldn't find in others. Being an outsider has been a safeguard for me although isolating at times. It is allowed me a lot of free time to continue doing inner work. I do not connect to the systems within this matrix and so am not programmed by the lies and propaganda that keeps people imprisoned in the fear paradigm. That's why I don't wear a mask, neither a false ego mask or a virus mask.
I LOVE you Kamikaze tsunami! Are you my brain or my heart?
I wear a mask because I look hideous and pathetic
@@dennismclaurin1487 You should be working more on your unconsciousness than worrying about what you look like. You have a lot of problems.
I've become a recluse. And now I can only spend time with myself. Which has turned out to be fine. I like myself. Heck, I love myself.
I opened my eyes far from this society 's manipulation and learned to think by myself. I walk alone and I am fascinated.
I'm humbly inspired by this comment
Where we don’t belong they cannot obligate us to stay - Beautifully sublime statement :)
This comment is how I feel at that workplace----
But I have no choice, but to endure, in these end times.
The powers that be turned that workplace into Satan's redisency
I'm always content being on the outside, I've always been an outcast. But, today, for some reason, I am having a very hard time with it after seeing how I'm constantly excluded from gatherings with the group of gals my age at church. Was even thinking that it must be me!! But, honest to God, I'm not the type that has issues with folk and I just couldn't, for the life of me today, comprehend why I wasn't invited to yet another "thing," when I have a decent-talking relationship with all of the gals who went. I even started crying inconsolably. Some of hormonal, but, I was just over it. And, your video helped remind me that I don't NEED to get invited. You're right, I am involved in a lot and I can leave when I want because I'm not tied to them like that. Cliques still suck.
I can relate to this video. I have been an outcast for most of my life.
This comment section makes me feel less alone. I wish I knew people like y’all in my daily life.
If you are an outsider at this point, congratulations. You figured out what the "insiders" can never know...
True
As you get older you rather be alone; even though I have lots of friends I enjoy my own freindship.... Thanks for your video !!!
There are enormous benefits to living a more solitary life, if one is predisposed to it. There is also enormous pressure to fill a meaningful role in society. And, I agree that outcasts and outsiders are navigators of this terrain. Great video thanks for posting, I love this line... "Where we don't belong, they cannot obligate us to stay."
The only times I've truly been unhappy is when I've tried being 'normal' because the world feels so contrived to me.
I fundamentally understand the concept of society so people don't just destroy each other but equally, the idea we've accepted the cycle of work, taxes, & consuming endless stuff just to feel something is suffocating.
Yes but minus consuming random sh.
Thank you. This video came out when I really needed it. I was feeling very lonely and been left alone by My friends. But I think I need to practice more a intentional solitude to feel more connected with myself
You are strong enough to withstand the storm. You are the security you need.
Perfect timing. I'm feeling so guilty just because I feel lost and alone.
There's an excellent collection of letters written by Rilke which offers wisdom on being alone but not lonely, on being comfortable in the role of outsider. Titled "Letters To A Young Poet". I highly recommend to anyone who connected with this video.
Funny thing about Henry David Thoreau is that his “house in the woods” was only about a mile or two from his parents house and he would regularly walk their to have supper and do his laundry.
Oh my 🙈🤣
Not a hermit then, more like mama's boy.....🤔
That’s a common problem of philosophers and existential thinkers, they’re intelligent but are very bad and lazy at basic survival stuffs .
I cannot express how much I needed to hear this.
Excellent timing!♥ Thank you from all of my heart.
It's a horrible feeling being a outcast most of your life. people tell me to just be myself. I have. it's just that who I am isn't what most are looking for unfortunately and to change my style and identity in order to just seems fake to me. I like me and my personality. I wish someone else and others did.
You are a niche product - that means it’s more difficult to find the correct buyer as ‘ordinary’ people would be intimidated by you. unfortunately, majority of people are insecure, lacking in self awareness and afraid of being alone so it’s easy for them to find someone and appeal to each other. Do you want to belong to the 90%?
“Mingling where we don’t fit in, and preserving the freedom to leave at all times.” My life to a T.
Your videos are fantastic, I have no doubt that your voice and thoughts are significant to many on their personal journey of self-enquiry, they are certainly a part of mine. Thank you.
I love this video! It describes perfectly what I discovered about being an outsider and a loner since I was a child. It is super fun to be an outsider, you have the freedom to explore, to be in control of your life and to feel more deeply connected about certain things.
I left society on my own... It's a lot of work to reintegrate back in
Follow your own heart and follow your own spirit ❤🌟
"Because where we do not belong they cannot obligate us to stay"
I loved that.
"Because where we do not belong, they cannot obligate us to stay."
They can still blame you for accepting the role of outcast that they gave you.
You would know that if you were pushed out first, rather than decided to leave.
And what's this business about being able to reintegrate BACK in?
@@fredbmurphy I was not given a label. I chose to leave on my own as I said. 🤙🏽
@@yulnikita what made you chose to leave in the first place?
@@fredbmurphy That's a really good question 🤔 & surprisingly I can't pinpoint a particular reason..
I'll definitely have to do some introspective work for that one 😅
Thank you
@@fredbmurphy It could just be that I wasn't accepting of myself and chose to remove myself from society
Im an outsider and i used to be popular, A few years after I lost my popularity, I got bullied, Often I feel lonely, and I have not much friends, but lifes goes on and im adapted to being an outsider. My mood had swapped from joyful, confidence, to lonely and sad. Welp I get a lot of my work done through.
I’ve accepted being alone. I refuse to keep trying to fit in.
Normally 99% of videos like this say a bunch of "bla bla im saying typical stuff cause i just want views".
But. As someone who's extremely genuinely a misfit, I cant help but feel like whoever wrote this *actually* really understands what its like.
They speak a language that only real outsiders can connect with.
I KNOW there's not "alot" of us out there. But there seems to be some.
Id love to meet one. Or at least be aware that I'm talking to one, cause im sure ive prolly met one or two but we're so reclusive its next to impossible to even know it.
Sometimes we can hide it very well.. at least i know i can
Haven't y'all heard? All y'all herd.
🍰
I'm 60 - AND have ALWAYS beat to a different drum to the crowd...I am proud to be an INDIVIDUAL...more should embrace this ideal - I'm sure following the crowd scared to be different is why we are in this mess...please don't be afraid to be cancelled wear it like a badge of HONOUR..them those that cancelled you will see you standing tall in your TRUTH...then they will think twice. XXOOXX be brave little WARRIORS who are unique..it's a privilege not a burden. XXOOXX WWG1WGA
When I was around 6 my mom came to the United States with my my sister and 2 brothers and I was left behind because my mom didn't had enough money to bring me. In the mean time I lived with different families becuase my dad didn't wanted to take care of me. When I went to live with someone I was hoping to get accepted and loved but many times I just suffered and to the next family I whent, It took 3 years of this. Finally my mom had enough money to bring me but the damage had already been done. Now I feel like I don't belong anywhere even in my own family. When a women rejects me it hurts me alot but thankfully I have the will power to stay strong. Now I'm 41 and don't want to deal with no one. Many suicidal thoughts have come to my head all the time but I stay strong.
Thanks for making this video. I have been deeply troubled by not belonging. I try so hard to fit in but then I feel like I lose myself in doing so and not being myself is painful. I'd rather be alone than become a sheep