I tested all this. I always had trouble getting up from bed. But the next best thing that I realize was to walk out of multiple doors in the house. Then, I was in a very different headspace, able to focus on the next next best thing, which ultimately led to productivity
A tactic that works for me when I remember it is the phrase "Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly". It's a silly thing, because it sounds wrong, but the reality is, anything that's worth doing, on balance, it's better to do it slowly, inefficiently, weakly, etc. than it is to not do it at all. So I push myself to sometime to just do the worst thing that pushes me towards the goal. By worst I don't mean actually bad or harmful, but I mean kind of the most pathetic. This gets around the "not enough" feeling. It's not meant to be enough. If anything, I might feel resistance because it's not pathetic enough. Then when I'm actually started, I am allowed to do more, but I certainly don't push myself to do more. It's the pushing that creates the resistance anyways. At the start there was a fear of external judgment, but really I had the opposite. I was more effective overall, so people were happy.
I'm starting to do this now. I thought 5 minutes of yoga wasn't good enough but I had so much resistance to doing any amount...found out that 5 minutes feels pretty good anyway.
Same here, I started with 10 minutes and I said that's not enough, but after doing it for several days it's like, I'm fine this is good, planning to go into 12 minutes.
100% 3 new words a day is still a thousand in a year 1 page a day is still a whole book a year 1 km of walking is still 365 km a year minus one candy is still minus 3.6 kilograms of sugar a year minus one glass of wine is still minus 55 liters a year minus one cigarette a day is still minus 18 packs a year
"Walk through a door" is so fire. I already do this unintentionally and it was mind-blowing to hear a justification on why it seems to make my mind clearer.
The only thing I achieve by going for a walk, which I do regularly, is to do some exercise and when I come back, the first thing I do is to turn on the PC... 😅
From years of working out, I found that half-assing is better than no-assing. I used not to be able to do a single pull up, but after doing hundreds of sad looking pseudo pull ups, I finally managed to get one proper pull up. Now I can do more than three in a row. From there I started applying that mentality to a lot of things in my life.
I've experienced this so many times on my productivity journey. I listen to the "just get started" folks and I end up burning myself out on menial tasks just to look back and see that I've made what feels like no progress. I've since been trying to focus on what would be the most impactful thing I can do that costs the least amount of energy. This usually drives me towards more enriching behaviors. I used to tell myself "I have to do x first before I do anything else" which was a huge set up. Now I give myself permission to avoid the tedious parts while I do the thing I'll feel the best about getting done.
I remembered that when I was looking for a job and couldn’t even decide on a professional field, I procrastinated this task as much as I could. At some point, I said to myself: okay, you don’t have to read this book (about a career) for an hour, just find one really good piece of advice, a small practical step and you can put the book down. It worked like magic. An even cooler example was when I was working on my diploma, and it was a complete mess, I didn’t understand how to approach it at all. Then I decided that at least I could write one paragraph of introduction and a list of references :D Little by little, the work was done.
This is so helpful-thank you! In terms of steps in the middle, it reminds me of the one other strategy I use for my "addiction" to sweets. Basically, it is to increase the difficulty of obtaining the sweets by adding more "steps" in the middle to obtain it. For example, I never keep sweets at home because they're easily obtainable and I have zero willpower. So, I add "steps" in the middle to make it more difficult to obtain my fav. candy bar, for example. In essence, if I want a candy bar I tell myself I need to get my keys and wallet (locked in a safe on the 4th floor), put multi-layers of winter clothing on to brave the sub zero temps so I can walk to the store at night (no driving). Then, I tell myself I have to count out all the change (no plastic) etc. etc. I make it as difficult as possible and add as many "not so fun" steps in the middle to get my fix that, in the end, it's not worth it. I mean who wants to put on seven layers of clothing, trudge through a foot of snow at night, to get to the nearest 7-11 and then fumble around like an idiot counting change for a Mars bar?
I did something similar with scrolling. I found this app called ScreenZen which lets you add a delay before opening certain apps, so now whenever I try to open UA-cam a message pops up with a 20sec timer. A lot of the time I just think "I can't be bothered to wait this long" so I just close it and move on with my day.
i discovered this "tactic" when tiktok and youtube got blocked in our country. i mean i still have access to them BUUUUUT theres one single step that makes me keep myself from impulsive actions im only one click from. i have to turn on vpn. which means i have to wait for an app to load then press a button to wait it to find a server then watch a 30 sec ad to make it connect to the server then press X three fucking times and only theeeen ill be able to get into the app :0)
I've found that I like to just finish the thing rather than have it loom over my head, but doing something all at once sucks and gets me even more against myself. But when I realize that I actually chipped away at that thing I was trying to do its so much better than not doing it at all. That mentality of "I might as well do 5 pages instead of just 1 (even if I am uncapable of that)" is only able if I've said my goal is to do the 1 page and then after I do that little amount I am capable of I'll say, "okay one more paragraph. Maybe another paragraph. I might as well finish the page." And continue until I've tapped out. Similar with working out. "ugh I don't wanna do legs. But I can just get dressed. I can walk outside. I can walk to the school next to the gym. Oh I'm hear I might as well stretch. Oh I might as well do like just the squat exercise. Oh I did my routine cool. " The door routine seems like that exactly, walk through however many doors you can before entering that room just to get closer to the destination rather than just staying put.
@@hollowedboi5937 yeah I agree with you. Those “little steps” are what actually get me to do things that otherwise just seem overwhelming - like a negotiating tactic with myself. Maybe it varies from person to person?
There’s to much to do in life from a societal standard, we weren’t meant to adapt like this and everybody’s just stressed and now procrastinating because nobody really wants to do any of this bullshit
You are so right. I once had a math teacher who was awesome. He explained to our class that this is the most stressful time in human history and one of the reasons for that is constant social demand to change. He said that from the time of the ancient civilizations in Europe, Asia and Africa to the early 1900s, basic life was essentially the same. 6,000 years ago people used horses and carts and they did in the early 1900s. Accounting and record keeping were basically the same even when considering different languages, paper, stone tablets etc. Then everything changed. We must buy new computers and software regularly. As soon as we master their use they are obsolete and we must upgrade. Then we have to keep up with social norms and constantly changing laws and tax demands. If we fail at any task we risk poverty, imprisonment or death. We are constantly on our highest setting and it floods us with cortisol. It is destroying us.
Cold showers, or even splashing cold water on your face, should be the first thing one does when they notice their thoughts have turned into fear based or ‘doom & gloom.’ What you are referring to is what is known as Nervous System Dysregulation. Life, old wounds, smells, thoughts, so many things trigger us and get our nervous system activated into a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn state. Aka sympathetic. As soon as one notices we are in a state, the cold water calms our nervous system and moves it back to parasympathetic. Sadly, most of us have basically lived our entire lives triggered into one state or another. Which is the cause of what ails us…just about every sickness, disease, cancer, etc. is the result of our constant activation. And yes, the grounding you suggest is one way to calm our nervous systems as well. Thx for speaking about this.
I've been practicing "effective procrastination". It's similar to what you have mentioned. When I am energized and able to work, I have absolutely no problem cranking out the work I need to. But in moments of ego depletion, none of that is going to happen. But what I can do is let my neuroses prime my environment for the next time I engage with my tasks. I can't get through my readings, but I can sure as hell place the books in convenient places for me to get through them, with a trusty notepad nearby. I can't lift weights right now, but I can definitely prepare my weights as needed. I don't feel like playing the game I'm trying to take to completion, but I will set up the system and maybe play with some spreadsheets to optimize the gameplay. If I can't do the thing, I'll prime the thing.
@@KingParth90210 that's a pretty unnecessary comment. There really is nothing wrong with taking a step back and relaxing. I don't know why you're making such a reductive comment like this. Are you projecting?
Ask GPT to play the role and then adjust it for a few days with your personal input (personality, how to communicate with you etc.) and then you're set tbh
@@-Timur1214gpt can't undertand the information it gives, it just spills out. It could work as a DIY, but many people need a therapist becuse they can't DIY.
I absolutely love this video session. I am saving it to watch when I feel stuck. I have watched it twice so far and I know I am only remembering the tip of the iceberg. So much content to process. I am so grateful for the access to so much free therapy and wisdom available on UA-cam.
You are AWESOME!! I remember listening to you once before and feeling very positive about your video and thinking I want to hear you again so I ran back into you today and you are really enlightening I am a huge procrastinator I will start listening to your videos from now on it's like you're inside my head!😏 thank you so much for giving me" the next thing to do"!
Man, your videos are so soothing, calming, relatable and it just feels like safe space where some dude that knows his shit and lives on the other side of the planet helps you stay sane. Thank you, Dr. K. Truly, from the bottom of my heart. And I think I speak for millions at that. You are a role model.
Dr. K’s insights on working memory blew my mind! It explains so much about why I get stuck in procrastination loops. Time to put these tips into action!
Amazing video. Your content has changed my life for the better and once I can afford it I look forward to buying your courses too. 😊 Have a peaceful day all.
I feel myself continuing to grow and i feel everytime I come to a new road block, suddenly DR K releases a video that helps me get through the block. ❤️❤️Thank you for all your help and advice!!
The doorway effect sounds fascinating. That explains why there is a common suggestion to take a short break, which often implies leaving the area for a short time. Often people go have a smoke outside or grab a cup of coffee which is often not immediately reachable within arms length. Having a short break at the working desk often doesnt feel like one. It could help to explain that some people, myself included, need a mental and also physical distinction between "home" and "work" and simply can't work from a room at home too long without breaking down at some point.
Your videos always make me realize that I'm procrastinating, and it's usually the last video I watch before I try to continue with my task Edit: Also, something that concerns me is that I've been breaking my cognition of my own abilities for so many years, that if you ask me "what can you do?", I would think "nothing". I imagine those are the kind of cases where the advice of "just get started" might have merit, specially if progression is quickly adjusted to the objective progression observed?
I started a whole food plant based diet but strict adherence was too unsustainable.. now I allow myself to cheat on the weekends and then jump right back into it on Monday. But if I really want a steak or fried chicken during the week I'll still allow myself to have that, provided I fill up on broccoli and carrots first. It's much easier to adhere when you don't have to fight your cravings with immense willpower.
Wow, I was wondering why I have a hard time remembering other options when I'm having an internal conflict of what to do. I never thought of my working memory being at its limit. Thank you, Dr. K!❤
FINALLY someone talks something really better and USEFUL than this “getting started” bs Who trully believes and does go for a 2’ walk? Do only 1 pushup at that day? Thanks Doc!!
Hello Dr.K I just wanted to say thank you for all you have done. As of now, I have learned so much from you and I genuinely appreciate your effort and passion to help new generation and the society overall. And thank you for all of your advices, as of now, I tried to implement most of it in my life and it has significantly improved my life quality.
Thanks to this video I've discovered why I don't have place in my mind for more than 1 thing to do at a time, it's even more the case I think for people who are never at what they are doing in the moment. And now I see that it can be a solution instead of a problem! 🙏 💡
Wait … you just kinda blew my mind. I used to be addicted to drugs 10 yrs ago and I have ALWAYS had a procrastination problem. Even now. Was then my drug use my way of procrastinating dealing with life ??? 😮
Who are you Dr. K? where have you been ? Each and every statement of you in this video is brutal breakthroughs for me. I just couldn't stop resist pausing the video and wondering about these bulb on moments. Thanks for today Dr. K
Not really. Getting over that hump can actually charge you up a lot if the hump was because of some mental block, fear, or just mental/behavioral momentum (not wanting to stop doing what you were doing). If the task then proceeds to go way easier and feels less scary than anticipated, you can actually get some long term reinforcement to do it more and avoid it less.
This honestly really helps with combating my brain telling me to "just get started." Cause it CAN sometimes work with me getting started on doing something but at the same time if whatever it is that I'm doing is huge, then it just feels too daunting. If I could focus on instead counting the sentences that I've typed out instead of how many I haven't it might help
Hey healthy gamer i had a long journey with inflamation in the gut turned out this was my sole reason for anxiety and lack of energy while its nice you teach me all that only a healty diet could better my condition i would love to talk about inflamation stuff
i had an exam a few weeks ago, i had to learn something like ?70 pages? and i couldn't get myself to read anything because i hated the subject. i forced myself to read again and again but i eventually burned out. the deadline was getting closer and closer, i accepted the fact that i'd fail the exam miserably but i told myself "hey, if i really can't read the paper, might as well make this slightly interesting and look up the subject on wikipedia" i don't know what it is about wikipedia but trying to understand the subject and creating links by myself helped, studying felt a little less like i wanted to run away from everything lol. in the end, some author i'd researched by myself was on the exam and although i didn't know enough, i still could do *something*. better than handing out a blank piece of paper.
My brain be like: Buttttt what about all this wasted time I can have, you're suddenly exhausted halfway through the video, just watch it "later" and keep your freedom
+ RECAP + not what you can, but what you should next best thing not just getting started start and do 1 line = start and do 5 lines go from best then lower "what can you do ?" working memory - limited = doesn't see all the possibility - reset = walk through a door / have a walk
Ended up listening to this while studying lol- I really needed advice to fix my procrastination ty Dr. K and healthy gamer team! I hope to do well on my exams this month with these tips and try my best!
I knew first hand the benefits of walking, felt that "clear mind's" different thinking, it was like I can finally think, while walking. Fascinating to learn about why it is so
One trick that has worked for me is something similar what the docs explaining here and that's to trick my brain into doing the first step only. That gets me rolling and I find myself doing the whole mountain of related tasks. Like if I need to wash the dishes, I tell myself I need to wash just one spoon and that's enough. And since I am already there, with liquid on the sponge, water running and all, I might as well wash everything in the sink. Obviously this is an example, but since I started structuring everythink like that, I've been way more productive than before. 🙏😁
anecdotally, I noticed that the doorway effect works with opening new tabs or going to new websites on your browser as well. if you are stuck on youtube scrolling, going to a new website that you don’t usually go on, or one where you usually do work (google docs, neocities, gmail, etc.) appears to do something similar.
The biggest mystery of life is needing to find a job to survive but procrastinating the heck out of actually applying and seeking a job and instead self-pitying my ass for being so lazy and always procrastinating 😢 procrastinating
This is the biggest problem in my entire life, my dad and mom are the same I probably took it from them and made it worse. I'm also extremely demotivated, I go to the gym regularly but when it comes to studying I procrastinate ( even when I remove all distractions I usually do anything like walking cleaning, or searching on the web ) and end up doing absolutely nothing and even eat a lot more than usual, I use social media because I don't have a family, and I want to escape my prison, and education is the only way out.
Ain't no way I just got a panick attack because I can't get my assignment on time for collage due to me procrastinating for 5 months not to study a single word I've been like this for 3 years now since I've finished high school and I think I'm afraid to change My friend suggested that I watch dr.k and I found some videos that I found interesting but didn't watch them This is a sign folks and the next semester I'll man up and stop putting my life on hold
As a gym person this makes so much sense. Always try to push till till failure The value of going to the jim is basically in reaching those last few reps Interesting how i never procrastinate in the jim when i do this
I had two weeks off Uni over Christmas and it killed my productivity. I had hoped to use that time to catch up on assignments. I had to bring back the ol' Pomodoro technique just to get myself to do 25 minutes of study.
I even procrastinate playing video games now 😅Definitely gonna try giving myself more options to choose from instead just doing it or not, thanks for the eye opener!
Was going to procrastinate this by adding this to my watch later. Procrastinated that and listened in. Realized I needed cotton swabs in the restroom and walked through the door to add it to my list as he was talking about it and wiped my mind of it. 😵💫
ill definately do all the chores, like taking trash out, then i feel like i worked hard and do anything but study and next day same again. since chores never run out unless you have a cleaning lady, this works like forever 15 min studying is sooo much tho. cant imagine sitting down studying several hours, is there even so much material for the average test? getting started also isnt the trick. doing the dishes literally gets harder whilst doing them
I guess you need just one word. Action. It worked for me and I am finally consistent with things that I must get done (it’s already few months being consistent)
notes: conflict between two activities, one takes zero will power and the other takes significant will power, you shift the significant to the lower side as much as possible ie DO THE NEXT BEST THING, lower the fucking standards, let it be just bigger than the other thing that you arent supposed to do so that atleast you are able to choose the right team, no matter its lowest end, it will eventually spiral you out to the desired point from there. The problem, ie a cognitive trap with just getting started is "not enough". Say you want to take out the trash but your mind doesnt want you to, so you say let me just put one cup in the trash and to this your mind replies "its not enough what good does moving one cup do?". The working memory thinks about the outcome, it uses logic such as "what is the use of doing something if it doesnt solve the problem? hence dont do it." If i have a test on friday, what is the use of reading one single line or even one single page says your mind, it is the biggest waste of time unless we study enough to pass the test (which we would do 5 minutes later). If i am to dig a well and the water is 100ft deep, it is a waste of time to dig 10ft. Cost benefit analysis. Dr K says the second problem with just starting is that we are so much more capable than just starting, so he suggests rather opting for doing the tiniest of stuff, just ask yourself what is the best thing or simply the right thing that you can do, that you will be willing to do, basically YOU CHOOSE what feels practically feasible for you to do. Understand your working memory, it reduced down everything to just two things, what you are supposed to do and what your mind wants you to do and it refuses to see something else. And now the thing which you are supposed to do is very will power demanding, so the inevitable mental conflict will take so much will power and you having lack of energy would result in the obvious loss which has already happened many times whereas in reality there are much options in between these two either or options which the working memory wont let you see in the heat of moment because just like with a toddler we can negotiate our options and find a middle ground we can do the same stuff with our minds. Creating options C,D,E etc will lead to less use of willpower and less rough conflict than the original fight. Shares the tactic of walking through the door, to reset the working memory, the experience of you knowing going into some room to get something and then forgetting why you entered the room in the first place. This is an example of resetting of your working memory. So take a walk and try going to number of doorways if you can. If you go out of your room, take a walk outside, your thinking will autmoatically change because the conflict depends on the working memory which is so fragile that a simple walk could reset it.
Hey Dr. K, loved the video! Would like to hear your two scents in this situation: I'm in a state that I can't even execute the simple, straight foward things that I plan out. I tried to follow so many tips I have read and heard but when I try to do the work I just... go completely numb!
So, 1 line is doable but since it doesn't get me the sense of achievement or sense of getting close enough to my achievement, I just don't start, hence the 5 minute rule doesn't work for me, but 5 pages which is less daunting than 15 pages does give me sense of achievement and hence is doable, so I should not do the smallest possible thing but the next best possible thing compared to my ideal task (the should). Did I get that right?
Ask ur self what can u do ? find a middle ground , And do the next best thing than just starting tiny. reset your Working Memory "RAM" , walk to as many doors as possible. Understand these principles and start to Harness those principles and make things easier on ur self.
Just for my understandanding: rather to think in ultimatums (I have to write my homework or doom scrolling for 3h), I rather should ask myself what is the closest thing to "doing homework" that brings me the most value and that Im also mentally able to affort, right? Also going outside is a cool trick to make your brain wanting to do stuff? These are my main take aways from the video
If people have $30 to spare, the ADHD module in Dr K’s guide has been super helpful for me understanding my mental blocks and finding ways to be more productive (even as someone who doesn’t have adhd). Highly recommend!
Comment for self Takeaways: do what you can do, try met in the middle. Don't start small, don't push too hard. Do the next best thing. If the struggle to resist is too hard, walm through a doorway or walk around a little, it resets your working memory.
Just gonna open this in a new tab to watch later
on diddy
So true. I opened the UA-cam notification thinking it was a short.
Oof, 17 mins video. I'll watch it when it's serious time lol
Who will carry the knowledge, and the self development?
If you can't watch it now can you watch it in 1 hr
... only to watch 2 years later. (Not me [this time] because I actually watched it!)
It’s so weird that you can even procrastinate over things that you enjoy
Right? I end up in limbo, avoiding things I really want to do, or need to do, and just doing low-effort time wasters.
thatz what the book "eat the frog" says
you can only do a limited number of things a day so you gotta procrastinate on something
Was wondering if I was the only person to experience that. I told some people and they didn't understand.
Aaaand that's why we had a members lecture called The Weird Stuff 😎 (not really, that weird stuff is WAY weirder)
so related
I tested all this. I always had trouble getting up from bed. But the next best thing that I realize was to walk out of multiple doors in the house. Then, I was in a very different headspace, able to focus on the next next best thing, which ultimately led to productivity
A tactic that works for me when I remember it is the phrase "Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly". It's a silly thing, because it sounds wrong, but the reality is, anything that's worth doing, on balance, it's better to do it slowly, inefficiently, weakly, etc. than it is to not do it at all. So I push myself to sometime to just do the worst thing that pushes me towards the goal. By worst I don't mean actually bad or harmful, but I mean kind of the most pathetic.
This gets around the "not enough" feeling. It's not meant to be enough. If anything, I might feel resistance because it's not pathetic enough. Then when I'm actually started, I am allowed to do more, but I certainly don't push myself to do more. It's the pushing that creates the resistance anyways.
At the start there was a fear of external judgment, but really I had the opposite. I was more effective overall, so people were happy.
I'm starting to do this now. I thought 5 minutes of yoga wasn't good enough but I had so much resistance to doing any amount...found out that 5 minutes feels pretty good anyway.
Same here, I started with 10 minutes and I said that's not enough, but after doing it for several days it's like, I'm fine this is good, planning to go into 12 minutes.
"Perfect is the enemy of done".
100%
3 new words a day is still a thousand in a year
1 page a day is still a whole book a year
1 km of walking is still 365 km a year
minus one candy is still minus 3.6 kilograms of sugar a year
minus one glass of wine is still minus 55 liters a year
minus one cigarette a day is still minus 18 packs a year
basically , half assing is better than no assing in dr.k's words
"Walk through a door" is so fire. I already do this unintentionally and it was mind-blowing to hear a justification on why it seems to make my mind clearer.
lol, I find myself walking around the got dam house sometimes too.
The doorway effect is so fascinating to me. It totally works, both in the negative and the positive.
The only thing I achieve by going for a walk, which I do regularly, is to do some exercise and when I come back, the first thing I do is to turn on the PC... 😅
@Ren-1979 try going to a different room lol. But I get that.
Maybe try putting the PC in a very inconvenient room lol.
From years of working out, I found that half-assing is better than no-assing. I used not to be able to do a single pull up, but after doing hundreds of sad looking pseudo pull ups, I finally managed to get one proper pull up. Now I can do more than three in a row. From there I started applying that mentality to a lot of things in my life.
I've experienced this so many times on my productivity journey. I listen to the "just get started" folks and I end up burning myself out on menial tasks just to look back and see that I've made what feels like no progress. I've since been trying to focus on what would be the most impactful thing I can do that costs the least amount of energy. This usually drives me towards more enriching behaviors. I used to tell myself "I have to do x first before I do anything else" which was a huge set up. Now I give myself permission to avoid the tedious parts while I do the thing I'll feel the best about getting done.
Hello, myself?
I remembered that when I was looking for a job and couldn’t even decide on a professional field, I procrastinated this task as much as I could. At some point, I said to myself: okay, you don’t have to read this book (about a career) for an hour, just find one really good piece of advice, a small practical step and you can put the book down. It worked like magic. An even cooler example was when I was working on my diploma, and it was a complete mess, I didn’t understand how to approach it at all. Then I decided that at least I could write one paragraph of introduction and a list of references :D Little by little, the work was done.
This is so helpful-thank you! In terms of steps in the middle, it reminds me of the one other strategy I use for my "addiction" to sweets. Basically, it is to increase the difficulty of obtaining the sweets by adding more "steps" in the middle to obtain it. For example, I never keep sweets at home because they're easily obtainable and I have zero willpower. So, I add "steps" in the middle to make it more difficult to obtain my fav. candy bar, for example. In essence, if I want a candy bar I tell myself I need to get my keys and wallet (locked in a safe on the 4th floor), put multi-layers of winter clothing on to brave the sub zero temps so I can walk to the store at night (no driving). Then, I tell myself I have to count out all the change (no plastic) etc. etc. I make it as difficult as possible and add as many "not so fun" steps in the middle to get my fix that, in the end, it's not worth it. I mean who wants to put on seven layers of clothing, trudge through a foot of snow at night, to get to the nearest 7-11 and then fumble around like an idiot counting change for a Mars bar?
I did something similar with scrolling. I found this app called ScreenZen which lets you add a delay before opening certain apps, so now whenever I try to open UA-cam a message pops up with a 20sec timer. A lot of the time I just think "I can't be bothered to wait this long" so I just close it and move on with my day.
i discovered this "tactic" when tiktok and youtube got blocked in our country. i mean i still have access to them BUUUUUT theres one single step that makes me keep myself from impulsive actions im only one click from. i have to turn on vpn. which means i have to wait for an app to load then press a button to wait it to find a server then watch a 30 sec ad to make it connect to the server then press X three fucking times and only theeeen ill be able to get into the app :0)
I ascended! After returning from work, I now procrastinate even on video games!
8:45 Do the next best thing: focus on what you can do (i.e. capability) rather than what you should do (i.e. wish)
I've found that I like to just finish the thing rather than have it loom over my head, but doing something all at once sucks and gets me even more against myself. But when I realize that I actually chipped away at that thing I was trying to do its so much better than not doing it at all. That mentality of "I might as well do 5 pages instead of just 1 (even if I am uncapable of that)" is only able if I've said my goal is to do the 1 page and then after I do that little amount I am capable of I'll say, "okay one more paragraph. Maybe another paragraph. I might as well finish the page." And continue until I've tapped out.
Similar with working out. "ugh I don't wanna do legs. But I can just get dressed. I can walk outside. I can walk to the school next to the gym. Oh I'm hear I might as well stretch. Oh I might as well do like just the squat exercise. Oh I did my routine cool. " The door routine seems like that exactly, walk through however many doors you can before entering that room just to get closer to the destination rather than just staying put.
@@hollowedboi5937 yeah I agree with you. Those “little steps” are what actually get me to do things that otherwise just seem overwhelming - like a negotiating tactic with myself. Maybe it varies from person to person?
There’s to much to do in life from a societal standard, we weren’t meant to adapt like this and everybody’s just stressed and now procrastinating because nobody really wants to do any of this bullshit
I feel this.
True
@@KingParth90210 way to win the argument, you go make those millions buddy I believe in you!
You are so right. I once had a math teacher who was awesome. He explained to our class that this is the most stressful time in human history and one of the reasons for that is constant social demand to change. He said that from the time of the ancient civilizations in Europe, Asia and Africa to the early 1900s, basic life was essentially the same. 6,000 years ago people used horses and carts and they did in the early 1900s. Accounting and record keeping were basically the same even when considering different languages, paper, stone tablets etc. Then everything changed. We must buy new computers and software regularly. As soon as we master their use they are obsolete and we must upgrade. Then we have to keep up with social norms and constantly changing laws and tax demands. If we fail at any task we risk poverty, imprisonment or death. We are constantly on our highest setting and it floods us with cortisol. It is destroying us.
@@KingParth90210 notice how you said "will" which implies you don't have the money already lmfao foh wagie
Cold showers, or even splashing cold water on your face, should be the first thing one does when they notice their thoughts have turned into fear based or ‘doom & gloom.’
What you are referring to is what is known as Nervous System Dysregulation. Life, old wounds, smells, thoughts, so many things trigger us and get our nervous system activated into a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn state. Aka sympathetic. As soon as one notices we are in a state, the cold water calms our nervous system and moves it back to parasympathetic.
Sadly, most of us have basically lived our entire lives triggered into one state or another. Which is the cause of what ails us…just about every sickness, disease, cancer, etc. is the result of our constant activation.
And yes, the grounding you suggest is one way to calm our nervous systems as well.
Thx for speaking about this.
Dr. K, on April Fool's Day could you please do an entire video in your stereotypical Indian accent? It's great.
Yes we need it
lol
Yes
That was funniest😂😂
I've been practicing "effective procrastination". It's similar to what you have mentioned. When I am energized and able to work, I have absolutely no problem cranking out the work I need to. But in moments of ego depletion, none of that is going to happen. But what I can do is let my neuroses prime my environment for the next time I engage with my tasks. I can't get through my readings, but I can sure as hell place the books in convenient places for me to get through them, with a trusty notepad nearby. I can't lift weights right now, but I can definitely prepare my weights as needed. I don't feel like playing the game I'm trying to take to completion, but I will set up the system and maybe play with some spreadsheets to optimize the gameplay.
If I can't do the thing, I'll prime the thing.
@@KingParth90210 that's a pretty unnecessary comment. There really is nothing wrong with taking a step back and relaxing. I don't know why you're making such a reductive comment like this. Are you projecting?
saved this to watch later to hopefully watch it in the next week or so
Just reminding you, this is pretty good. You should watch.
Try to ask yourself how soon and how much you can watch if you do not need to watch it all at once ✍️📝
He says something really interesting here @ 5:35
I need this man as my therapist
Ask GPT to play the role and then adjust it for a few days with your personal input (personality, how to communicate with you etc.) and then you're set tbh
I need a therapist
@@-Timur1214do not do this, ai can never replace a connection with a real human being
@@-Timur1214gpt can't undertand the information it gives, it just spills out. It could work as a DIY, but many people need a therapist becuse they can't DIY.
@@Astrodiddlearen't they suppose to be using emotionless mask when they speak with their patient?
I absolutely love this video session. I am saving it to watch when I feel stuck. I have watched it twice so far and I know I am only remembering the tip of the iceberg. So much content to process. I am so grateful for the access to so much free therapy and wisdom available on UA-cam.
Thanks
You are AWESOME!! I remember listening to you once before and feeling very positive about your video and thinking I want to hear you again so I ran back into you today and you are really enlightening I am a huge procrastinator I will start listening to your videos from now on it's like you're inside my head!😏 thank you so much for giving me" the next thing to do"!
Man, your videos are so soothing, calming, relatable and it just feels like safe space where some dude that knows his shit and lives on the other side of the planet helps you stay sane. Thank you, Dr. K. Truly, from the bottom of my heart. And I think I speak for millions at that. You are a role model.
Dr. K’s insights on working memory blew my mind! It explains so much about why I get stuck in procrastination loops. Time to put these tips into action!
alright, I'll try it, I'll do the next best thing that I can manage
Amazing video. Your content has changed my life for the better and once I can afford it I look forward to buying your courses too. 😊
Have a peaceful day all.
I feel myself continuing to grow and i feel everytime I come to a new road block, suddenly DR K releases a video that helps me get through the block. ❤️❤️Thank you for all your help and advice!!
The doorway effect sounds fascinating. That explains why there is a common suggestion to take a short break, which often implies leaving the area for a short time. Often people go have a smoke outside or grab a cup of coffee which is often not immediately reachable within arms length. Having a short break at the working desk often doesnt feel like one.
It could help to explain that some people, myself included, need a mental and also physical distinction between "home" and "work" and simply can't work from a room at home too long without breaking down at some point.
Your videos always make me realize that I'm procrastinating, and it's usually the last video I watch before I try to continue with my task
Edit: Also, something that concerns me is that I've been breaking my cognition of my own abilities for so many years, that if you ask me "what can you do?", I would think "nothing". I imagine those are the kind of cases where the advice of "just get started" might have merit, specially if progression is quickly adjusted to the objective progression observed?
I started a whole food plant based diet but strict adherence was too unsustainable.. now I allow myself to cheat on the weekends and then jump right back into it on Monday. But if I really want a steak or fried chicken during the week I'll still allow myself to have that, provided I fill up on broccoli and carrots first. It's much easier to adhere when you don't have to fight your cravings with immense willpower.
Wow, I was wondering why I have a hard time remembering other options when I'm having an internal conflict of what to do. I never thought of my working memory being at its limit. Thank you, Dr. K!❤
This video is well timed. Very much needed!
FINALLY someone talks something really better and USEFUL than this “getting started” bs
Who trully believes and does go for a 2’ walk? Do only 1 pushup at that day?
Thanks Doc!!
This is genius level breakthrough way of thinking. Game changer for me in 2025
Thank you so much for this knowledge
Keep going
0:52 - 0:53 is my new Mantra
Dr K literally spits the Truth!
Thank you Dr. K. I am constantly quoting your videos to my family and my therapist. They are so helpful.
Hello Dr.K
I just wanted to say thank you for all you have done.
As of now, I have learned so much from you and I genuinely appreciate your effort and passion to help new generation and the society overall.
And thank you for all of your advices, as of now, I tried to implement most of it in my life and it has significantly improved my life quality.
Thanks to this video I've discovered why I don't have place in my mind for more than 1 thing to do at a time, it's even more the case I think for people who are never at what they are doing in the moment. And now I see that it can be a solution instead of a problem!
🙏 💡
We practiced dialogue writing. Dialogue conversation is fantastic Dr.K. and still drive the point home.🎉
Wait … you just kinda blew my mind. I used to be addicted to drugs 10 yrs ago and I have ALWAYS had a procrastination problem. Even now. Was then my drug use my way of procrastinating dealing with life ??? 😮
Who are you Dr. K? where have you been ? Each and every statement of you in this video is brutal breakthroughs for me. I just couldn't stop resist pausing the video and wondering about these bulb on moments. Thanks for today Dr. K
It's like "activation energy" in chemical reactions. You need to get over the initial hump to get started, then it's all downhill.
Not really. Getting over that hump can actually charge you up a lot if the hump was because of some mental block, fear, or just mental/behavioral momentum (not wanting to stop doing what you were doing). If the task then proceeds to go way easier and feels less scary than anticipated, you can actually get some long term reinforcement to do it more and avoid it less.
@@Riwillion I agree, but that's what the original comment also said, maybe you misinterpreted what he meant by "downhill".
@@ric6611 Oh, I see, yeah, I guess I did, my bad :P
This honestly really helps with combating my brain telling me to "just get started." Cause it CAN sometimes work with me getting started on doing something but at the same time if whatever it is that I'm doing is huge, then it just feels too daunting. If I could focus on instead counting the sentences that I've typed out instead of how many I haven't it might help
Love this. You've got 3 down already right here! 🎉
Hey healthy gamer i had a long journey with inflamation in the gut turned out this was my sole reason for anxiety and lack of energy while its nice you teach me all that only a healty diet could better my condition i would love to talk about inflamation stuff
05:43 I love it when he does this 😃
amazing video, good adhd advice as well. This year I'm trying to work on my "all or nothing" mentality
Thank you for the video!
Added to Watch later!
i had an exam a few weeks ago, i had to learn something like ?70 pages? and i couldn't get myself to read anything because i hated the subject. i forced myself to read again and again but i eventually burned out. the deadline was getting closer and closer, i accepted the fact that i'd fail the exam miserably but i told myself "hey, if i really can't read the paper, might as well make this slightly interesting and look up the subject on wikipedia" i don't know what it is about wikipedia but trying to understand the subject and creating links by myself helped, studying felt a little less like i wanted to run away from everything lol. in the end, some author i'd researched by myself was on the exam and although i didn't know enough, i still could do *something*. better than handing out a blank piece of paper.
My brain be like: Buttttt what about all this wasted time I can have, you're suddenly exhausted halfway through the video, just watch it "later" and keep your freedom
+ RECAP +
not what you can, but what you should
next best thing
not just getting started
start and do 1 line = start and do 5 lines
go from best then lower
"what can you do ?"
working memory
- limited = doesn't see all the possibility
- reset = walk through a door / have a walk
Thank you Dr. K, very cool.
Ended up listening to this while studying lol- I really needed advice to fix my procrastination ty Dr. K and healthy gamer team! I hope to do well on my exams this month with these tips and try my best!
Yup! Getting Started feels like rolling a snow ball uphill
I knew first hand the benefits of walking, felt that "clear mind's" different thinking, it was like I can finally think, while walking. Fascinating to learn about why it is so
One trick that has worked for me is something similar what the docs explaining here and that's to trick my brain into doing the first step only. That gets me rolling and I find myself doing the whole mountain of related tasks.
Like if I need to wash the dishes, I tell myself I need to wash just one spoon and that's enough. And since I am already there, with liquid on the sponge, water running and all, I might as well wash everything in the sink. Obviously this is an example, but since I started structuring everythink like that, I've been way more productive than before. 🙏😁
Very well packed and useful info! Thank you Doctor!!
I like that you reinforce concepts like this, I don't mind repeat content
Thank you, Dr.K, this is really helpful!
Not this video showing up right as I'm about to journal how I've been procrastinating lmao
"What is the next best thing I can do?" I'm going to ask myself this when i procrastinate
anecdotally, I noticed that the doorway effect works with opening new tabs or going to new websites on your browser as well. if you are stuck on youtube scrolling, going to a new website that you don’t usually go on, or one where you usually do work (google docs, neocities, gmail, etc.) appears to do something similar.
Seriously great advice, just what I needed to make sense out of. Thank you, I wish i had realized this sooner
The biggest mystery of life is needing to find a job to survive but procrastinating the heck out of actually applying and seeking a job and instead self-pitying my ass for being so lazy and always procrastinating 😢 procrastinating
As always Dr K, your uploads are on time ✨🤩
This is the biggest problem in my entire life, my dad and mom are the same I probably took it from them and made it worse. I'm also extremely demotivated, I go to the gym regularly but when it comes to studying I procrastinate ( even when I remove all distractions I usually do anything like walking cleaning, or searching on the web ) and end up doing absolutely nothing and even eat a lot more than usual, I use social media because I don't have a family, and I want to escape my prison, and education is the only way out.
Ain't no way I just got a panick attack because I can't get my assignment on time for collage due to me procrastinating for 5 months not to study a single word
I've been like this for 3 years now since I've finished high school and I think I'm afraid to change
My friend suggested that I watch dr.k and I found some videos that I found interesting but didn't watch them
This is a sign folks and the next semester I'll man up and stop putting my life on hold
Today
Leaving this comment is the last thing I do before getting some second most important stuff done. Thx m8, great vid!
How'd it go?
Just in time for midterms. Time to binge on this before I start studying for real.
Greetings from Poland ❤️
Hi!
this door walking technique is OP
Amazing video! Thank you so much!
11:33 I don’t know what you’re about to say after this point. But I think you just highlighted my biggest problem.
Great video Dr. K 👍
As a gym person this makes so much sense.
Always try to push till till failure
The value of going to the jim is basically in reaching those last few reps
Interesting how i never procrastinate in the jim when i do this
I had two weeks off Uni over Christmas and it killed my productivity. I had hoped to use that time to catch up on assignments. I had to bring back the ol' Pomodoro technique just to get myself to do 25 minutes of study.
I even procrastinate playing video games now 😅Definitely gonna try giving myself more options to choose from instead just doing it or not, thanks for the eye opener!
Was going to procrastinate this by adding this to my watch later. Procrastinated that and listened in. Realized I needed cotton swabs in the restroom and walked through the door to add it to my list as he was talking about it and wiped my mind of it. 😵💫
So you put them on the list now, right?
Thank you, Dr.K!❤
Sir has all my respect, love from india
Thank you for your work ❤
Pefect timing for this video, my semester just started today lol
Another game changer from the Doc
ill definately do all the chores, like taking trash out, then i feel like i worked hard and do anything but study and next day same again. since chores never run out unless you have a cleaning lady, this works like forever
15 min studying is sooo much tho. cant imagine sitting down studying several hours, is there even so much material for the average test?
getting started also isnt the trick. doing the dishes literally gets harder whilst doing them
I guess you need just one word. Action. It worked for me and I am finally consistent with things that I must get done (it’s already few months being consistent)
notes:
conflict between two activities, one takes zero will power and the other takes significant will power, you shift the significant to the lower side as much as possible ie DO THE NEXT BEST THING, lower the fucking standards, let it be just bigger than the other thing that you arent supposed to do so that atleast you are able to choose the right team, no matter its lowest end, it will eventually spiral you out to the desired point from there.
The problem, ie a cognitive trap with just getting started is "not enough". Say you want to take out the trash but your mind doesnt want you to, so you say let me just put one cup in the trash and to this your mind replies "its not enough what good does moving one cup do?". The working memory thinks about the outcome, it uses logic such as "what is the use of doing something if it doesnt solve the problem? hence dont do it." If i have a test on friday, what is the use of reading one single line or even one single page says your mind, it is the biggest waste of time unless we study enough to pass the test (which we would do 5 minutes later). If i am to dig a well and the water is 100ft deep, it is a waste of time to dig 10ft. Cost benefit analysis.
Dr K says the second problem with just starting is that we are so much more capable than just starting, so he suggests rather opting for doing the tiniest of stuff, just ask yourself what is the best thing or simply the right thing that you can do, that you will be willing to do, basically YOU CHOOSE what feels practically feasible for you to do.
Understand your working memory, it reduced down everything to just two things, what you are supposed to do and what your mind wants you to do and it refuses to see something else. And now the thing which you are supposed to do is very will power demanding, so the inevitable mental conflict will take so much will power and you having lack of energy would result in the obvious loss which has already happened many times whereas in reality there are much options in between these two either or options which the working memory wont let you see in the heat of moment because just like with a toddler we can negotiate our options and find a middle ground we can do the same stuff with our minds. Creating options C,D,E etc will lead to less use of willpower and less rough conflict than the original fight.
Shares the tactic of walking through the door, to reset the working memory, the experience of you knowing going into some room to get something and then forgetting why you entered the room in the first place. This is an example of resetting of your working memory. So take a walk and try going to number of doorways if you can. If you go out of your room, take a walk outside, your thinking will autmoatically change because the conflict depends on the working memory which is so fragile that a simple walk could reset it.
Hey Dr. K, loved the video! Would like to hear your two scents in this situation: I'm in a state that I can't even execute the simple, straight foward things that I plan out. I tried to follow so many tips I have read and heard but when I try to do the work I just... go completely numb!
You may have saved my MSc! Thanks!
I can’t sleep, I wish to respawn
@@NihilismEnjoyer98 Sleep is the best thing in life.
do the nest best thing, rest
do guided yoga nidra by dr.k before sleeping today
thank you for your work dr.k
Couldn’t have been a better timing
The doorway effect explains why houses with open floor plans have always made me feel a little uneasy and anxious...
Doorway effect is so cool
So, 1 line is doable but since it doesn't get me the sense of achievement or sense of getting close enough to my achievement, I just don't start, hence the 5 minute rule doesn't work for me, but 5 pages which is less daunting than 15 pages does give me sense of achievement and hence is doable, so I should not do the smallest possible thing but the next best possible thing compared to my ideal task (the should). Did I get that right?
Ask ur self what can u do ? find a middle ground , And do the next best thing than just starting tiny.
reset your Working Memory "RAM" , walk to as many doors as possible.
Understand these principles and start to Harness those principles and make things easier on ur self.
"To drink or not to drink" -Shakesbeer, definitely 😂
Just for my understandanding: rather to think in ultimatums (I have to write my homework or doom scrolling for 3h), I rather should ask myself what is the closest thing to "doing homework" that brings me the most value and that Im also mentally able to affort, right?
Also going outside is a cool trick to make your brain wanting to do stuff?
These are my main take aways from the video
If people have $30 to spare, the ADHD module in Dr K’s guide has been super helpful for me understanding my mental blocks and finding ways to be more productive (even as someone who doesn’t have adhd). Highly recommend!
I literally have an exam on friday and have been thinking about what I should do to stop procrastinating
Watching this to help my friends
Comment for self
Takeaways: do what you can do, try met in the middle. Don't start small, don't push too hard. Do the next best thing.
If the struggle to resist is too hard, walm through a doorway or walk around a little, it resets your working memory.