Unfortunately we have a Fed on our church security team🙄. Therefore I cannot be involved. I do not allow feds of any kind in my circle of trust. They are not family or freedom safe. I do have a tribe but it’s more like the last of the Mohicans. Too few of us.
When he started talking about developing a tribe with people at church this is immediately what I thought of. I have noticed a tribe developing in our security team. The only thing I wish is there were more people around my age. The average age of people in that group is probably 20 years older than me.
This episode made me brake down. I have no band of brothers, my wife dose not have a band of sisters. Our family is struggling, and our marriage is falling apart. my family, my wife, our marriage need some serious prayers. as well as my self.
For me, participating in the church, just like they said in this video really helped. Attended for 5 years but it was first when I actually started to help them plan events, renovate the church etc, that I started to get friends.
I started going to church in the past few months, and have found a good and faithful tribe. God led me and my schizophrenic daughter there. I have been isolated for 2 decades, no friends, no fellowship, but God led me there, and I KNOW He did. I have no other family but my daughters, and one of them is estranged from me bc of major family dysfunction and narcissism . I'm separated from my husband bc of his personality disorder!! God miraculously gave me a wonderful support system- to be blessed by and to bless!! God Is GOOD!!😊❤
Just sent a prayer up for you man. I don’t know you, but the Lord does. I don’t know what’s going on in your life, but the Lord does. Find a spiritually alive church. If you have question reply here, and I’d be happy to talk. God bless!
brother, no it's not. It only stops when we stop trying. Gather strength, focus on health. Rest is a must. But i feel you. I feel like finally me and my wife are starting to get over our biggest speed bump and looking back, i see how easily we could have broken up if i succumbed to defeat. You got this!
Don't set yourself up for disappointment. Sorry to sound so blackpilled, but the majority of people out there won't even risk their social media account for you, let alone their job or even life. There is no such thing as tribe in the modern world, with the exception of your children. Even your woman is likely to walk in today's world. The only actual successful tribe out there, are the elite's of the nations, and the small rebel groups out there, like the Taliban.
Jiujitsu, or general MMA (which will include jiujitsu) would probably be better. It's a softer/friendlier practice, and people tend to get together at house parties for watching UFC events.
@c3bhm Now, now.. you can't be suggesting alien philosophy to John's tribe. Eastern martial arts brings the wisdom of the Tao which I compliment you for attempting to save the young men from these Nazis. John's philosophy is that you have to worship Big Daddy in the Sky to be a Good American. John probably thinks that Taoism is a Communist invention. Don't you be indoctrinating his followers with any of those ideas... makes it hard to turn them into stone cold killers.
Same boat brother. I have cigar shop friends, gym acquaintances. A few dinner couple friends. But I don’t really have a one and one friend and havnt had that for about 30 years
Have y'all considered creating a Warrior Poet community... with local chapters... Could even be an NPO... you could be the connection point for thousands of tribes across the country. I'd be down... even if there were a nominal membership fee.
I gotta say i'd love an online group that lets you find like minded folks in your area! but the feds would probably use it as a way to keep track of those of us that love freedom . . .
John- everything yall said describes me. Very hard to find band of brothers with the weekly routine of sleep, eat, go to work, and repeat it all over again. John thanks for being a ray of hope in a sea of despair. Please setup an online community and I'm there. Also, I'd like to come and hang out with you guys.
It's important for us as wives to encourage our husbands to find a good group of male friends. Also, I would love to hear from the wives how they have found their 'tribes' when moving to a new location. Love your channel!
There’s a saying, happy wife happy life and that 100% works the other way too. It’s in a relationships best interest to encourage your partner to have a solid group of friends and a few outlets that don’t always involve our partners 👍👍👍
We got adopted in by our new neighbors. Been to lots of feast meals with at least 45 of their relatives. They've helped us build buildings pour concrete brought us free pipe water tanks fences welding jobs. Best move ever! Growing big love for my village.
"Men connect side by side doing something together." That's correct, in my experience. A family friend of mine and I are super close because we do construction together. Although I'm 30 and he's pushing 70, I enjoy the time spent learning from an older generation man and shooting the breeze as we work side by side. We don't hangout and talk outside of work, but we sure talk a lot when we have tools in our hands. It's a positive experience I wouldn't give up for the world.
This is all so true. Our men absolutely need a band of brothers...and has brought to my attention we women need a circle of sisters of like minds as well. My husband and I need to work on this. Thanks for this guys. Good stuff here. Blessings to you all.
I found a new “band of brothers” by doing my own thing and just chatting about it. I started with raising my own beef and that brought in a few like minded folk. Then butchering chickens brought more. Then , and more people came along. We’re all trading and canning food for ourselves and growing. It’s awesome!!
Camping is a great way to find a tribe. Clicks lots of boxes… Getting along for long periods of time. Cooking and planning, elements/weather, sharing resources.
It’s easier in smaller towns and more rural areas , my band is small but it’s a mixed of family and friends that have similar interest from the church and work . Guys and gals who enjoy hunting , fishing to shooting and bring prepared to help each other . Getting our entire families together to not only enjoy each others company but to build the trust that we will be there for each other no matter what!
Unless you are a refugee from a state that’s not favorable. It’s easy when you are from the small town and have built in family, etc. Interesting times.
@@tedcarl5382 I have to agree. Been in this town for 16 years, retired 3 years ago and started walking my dog. I still get people assuming I'm some homeless guy walking through town. ($1500 purebred hunting dog) I didn't have a kid play sports in town, I did go to a local church, but left when I was found to be too conservative in my biblical interpretation. (Imagine expecting elders to support tithing.)
I feel really fortunate in this area of life. I have a group of 7 buds. We all grew up together, played sports, spent time outdoors, shooting guns etc. After high school we all served missions for our church. Even with all the ups and down of life and growing our own families we have stuck together and recently formed our own little warrior poet group. I have always believed our brotherhood was divinely created. I know having a brotherhood is essential for every man to have if they want to live their best life.
Same here. I'm thinking of retiring early just to go back home (no jobs except local hospital & old folks home) but I get along with most everyone when I go visit .... even ppl I didn't grow up with and don't know well.
I love how authentic this is. Who knew other guys went through this? We've had the good fortune to find an awesome church here in central NC, and I fully know that most of the problems I've got connecting and making friends is me. Great thought provoking show though, so thank you!
Found my band serving with team rubicon. Many other veterans, common purpose helping others and doing good in places that need it. Great show guys. Keep it up.
Man! I feel like the oddball out now. In my 57 years, I’ve had tried multiple times to have a band of brothers in different aspects and activities in my life, but they have always let me down. I though we were tight, then either someone or a few of them have always let me down and made me not want to hang out with them. It makes me think “friends? Who needs them?” Because when you have friends and it always works out to where they want something from you. They get needy. And if you turn them down for a hang because I’m spending time with y family or just to relax by yourself, they get jealous and pissy like a chick and get mad. I’d be happy in a small cabin in the mountains somewhere far away from everyone. That’s my idea of happiness. I guess I’m a loner.
After moving country it’s been hard to make friends that don’t just use you for there purpose for you to be there for them but not if you need them I think it’s easier to say who need friends so I miss friends yes 100% but I don’t want fake ones either
I have self taught, via UA-cam flint knapping, woodcarving, gun safety, and am working on pottery now, but I would love doing it with others. Like I wish I had a group to camp and work on survival skills, shelter building, and cooking out doors. Foraging, gardening, and hunting, are some productive things, that are practical and interesting.
my wife and I went to church regularly for about 10 years and we didn't meet anyone. we forced ourselves to go to Sunday school as well and I (nearly) instantly had 3 lifelong friends. so important to get into those small groups that facilitate actually speaking to each other.
Your story is a common issue in churches. Our own church (I work on staff there) has talked about how some people attend for a long time and was never greeted by a staff member. So we're actively working on creating that community mindset and get to try and make everyone feel welcome as they come in the door!
The key to community is intentionality. You can have all the desire in the world to build a community but if the other people are not wanting to put forward the same effort there’s nothing you can do to change that and you’ll fight a futile battle. Intentional community building takes mutual sacrifice to spend time together and take time away from other things. And in todays American culture we pride ourselves in staying busy and it makes it difficult to unplug , slowdown, and connect with people
Only time I REALLY felt I had a tribe was in the service . Tried to find it but sadly realised that in civvy street it is not the same. When I got divorced I lost even that. I moved every 2 years from 6 to 26. I then moved , jobs professions, churches, I no longer have a faith. So I have no group. I just found an amazing fiance. So its her and the dogs!
Oh, man. The timing of this video. I recently sold my house in Nevada, and am moving to Tennessee. I have no family or friends there. My wife and I just want a change of pace (country living). The thought has crossed my mind about leaving the people I know in Nevada, to living in a place where I have to start over. This video made me realize that I'm not alone in thinking it could be difficult, but it's doable. I am a church person. I play drums on my worship team, and hope to join a worship team wherever I land. I LOVE playing drums, and hope to connect with members of a new team. I just found that people in church can put on a "church face" and be different in church than they are outside of church. It takes time to weed those people out and find the people who are straight forward and real on Sunday as well as the rest of the week.
Very on point! I am a Drug and Alcohol Therapist and I use this concept constantly in my work. I always recommend finding a “tribe” by following your interests. For instance, I like hunting and fishing. I joined the local Rod and Gun Club, made friends there, and have since developed a Youth Shooting Sports program with some of those guys..I also Made really good friends in AA as well when I first sobered off…. Found those who were interested in the same stuff in AA, and spend a lot of time hunting and fishing with a few of those dudes. I balance those things with family and work…
All great points. As a dad of 3 boys (15,16,19), and a husband, making the time is so hard. I feel guilty taking time away from my family, to do other things. Not because they guilt me, it’s just not easy to pull away for stuff like this.
I agree. What I don’t understand is how dads follow their kids around to all their various activities but kids don’t do dad like things i.e. hunting, hiking, lifting weights, competitive, shooting sports it’s almost like society has made lose what we used to have an United States
My friends are part of my network but to be a real brother you need to live with that person. Even if it's only one week a year on a camping trip. I've moved a lot and what I do to meet new people is attend things that interest me (farmers markets, volunteering at a food bank, pole dancing class, stuff like that).
It's odd. Here's how it went down for me. I come home from war and go to the VFW that my grandfather was a member at. Get carded, proof that I'm legit, they let me in. I get a beer at the bar and watch tv for an hour or so. Not a SINGLE person said a word to me. A room full of old vets. No younger guys to be found. I leave. Welp, so much for the VFW. I go to the VA and they're awesome. BUT STILL, it's like the old vets keep to themselves and it's just the younger Desert Storm and 9/11 vets that buddy up. Even then, it's just a doctor's appointment, so no deep or meaningful bonds are being formed. I decided an office job wasn't for me and wanted to get back into uniform. I used my GI Bill for Law Enforcement. I loved it. Very close knit and I'd like to think that I (and others like me) made it a bit closer. I was an FTO at the end and every rookie I trained, I drilled it into his/her head that everyone in the "First Responder Community" is our family. That firefighter over there, he's your brother. That paramedic, she's your sister. The 911 call center, brothers and sisters. That CO. Brother. Nurse. Sister. You get the picture. Most of these first responders are all veterans of our past 20 years of war and the "family" sentiment has run much deeper. We even have a first responder flag now. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. Before I retired, I hung the flag next to our time clock. The ritual goes like this. Punch the clock, slap the flag (like tagging into the fight like a wrestling match, but also, it connects you to all of the other first responders under that flag), and then enter the gates of hell (at the jail) and go to work. Last time I visited, that first responder flag was still there next to the time clock. 🥰
As a fulltime firefighter I'm very happy to hear that you taught the rookies that. I do the same with my rookie firefighters. We are all a part of the first responder family. You don't pick who is in your family like you do your friends, but they are your family, and family always needs to be there for one another.
Thank you for this. After taking off my uniform in 2006, I have not made real friends - tons of acquaintances yes, but I do not believe any of them would stand with me in righteousness as my uniformed band of brothers did all those years ago. This is because all of the people I know now have never served anything greater than themselves (they are all civilians). Updated: I agree with the sentiment at 10:45 - One of the reasons I believe my family has with not being able to truly connect with civilians is they do not champion work or work ethics. Since 2006 I have worked 6-7 days a week for 10-14 hours each day because I enjoy work. My neighbors do call and ask what my family is doing ‘later today’ as they would like to come over and hang out. We say “Sounds great, come on by! We are building furniture, or we are cutting down trees, or stripping the kitchen walls and installing new wiring - always work related things”. The neighbors decide they are not into work and towards the end of the phone call they say they are just going to stay home and watch TV or play video games. My family does not enjoy watching anything on TV (because TV is an indoctrination tool nor do we wish to waste time playing a video game because there are so many productive things we could be doing with our limited time on Earth. We simply do not connect with the civilian populations we have moved into. We too have moved 7 times across 3 states since 2009’s planned economic crash and it is the same story everywhere we go. I always offer my knowledge and skillset to rebuild their crumbling deck, or I offer to help them gut a room and redesign in but that is always too much work the civvies we move next to in every community we move to.
Bravo!!! I am a man who lives alone. I realized that I have a band of brothers. Truly. I will not take that for granted anymore. I will actually and knowingly engage better. Thank you guys!
I feel like I can relate to John in so many ways. I’m an introvert but I’m in sales so my job is talking and meeting with people all day. After my job is done, I just want to crawl into my own space and that’s why I enjoy eating alone. Gives me time to rest and regroup. The rest of my time is spent with my wife, family, church, hobbies, and dog. It’s hard to free up time for the brothers esp since were all spread out far now.
I am introvert as well. I do the same thing just differently. A big problem is that the world gets bigger it is more tough to have that group. It seems like we like the world smaller or everything is being moved around too much. I think there is a John Denver song Rocky Mountain High that is in the begging. Was JD an introvert?
Great topic. As we get older it definitely gets considerably more difficult to make new friends that actually become close and highly trusted. This is certainly something we all need to consider in our personal quests to take care of ourselves, our families, and our communities.
Man this hits home for me. I have three friends that I have known since the late 80's and went to school with, but we live all over the country. We get together weekly to record a Star Wars podcast, and that is a lot of fun, but I don't see them often. I could really use having them be near. It's tough as an adult...
I've made a good buddy of a coworker of my wife by running. We run, we chat about our lives, we exchange prayer requests. The running is our excuse, and the friendship followed. I've also found that my relationships with my dad, my brother, and my father-in-law are best built with side-by-side activity. And yes about serving in the church, you can't just show up, listen to the service, and leave. Gotta invest yourself in the family. Good video!
Former military, traveled most of my life, involved most of my life in church, train tactics all the time, my Band of Brothers are who I train with and the men at church. I read the Bible everyday and in spite of all I do I do much alone. I know who I can depend on and those who call on me I am there. I am comfortable being alone, besides not many guys my age can hang. I thoroughly enjoy watching your videos…happy for your success. Keep up the great work and thanks in more ways than you know for sharing the gospel.🙏😇❤️😎
I loved this one. I have zero friends. After I grew up, got married and we had kids, all my “buddies” weren’t ready for that and we just went separate ways. I would absolutely love to have a good group of buddies to shoot with, buy stupid unnecessary gear with, see who can get more ammo, train with, prepare with and just all that awesome freedom stuff lol. Anybody in East Tennessee who wants a tribe, hit me up! 😂😂
Virginia here, more towards the southwest, but.. 🤷🏼♂️ I need buddies to go shoot with, and build with, but as a father, and husband, it can b very difficult to find anytime for “buddy’s to shoot/train, and go rucking with… but I do know, I need that in my life haha it’s just hard to find time when you have a family and actually care haha
What actually caused you guys to go your separate ways? Because I have a friend who got married and had kids recently while the rest of us are single. We still invite him but obviously he's usually busy so inevitably I expect he will fade out of contact
Amen brother keep up the great work and honesty I as a man can assure you that most of us if not all love the truth you speak and can fully relate. Much more good done than "harm"
Great subject that never gets talked about. We are definitely in the lone wolf era. I'll throw another reason out. Age. As an aging fella death is a reality when it comes to friends. Unfortunately I lost my only true bros in the last 5 years. Good job on the topic guys.
My dad was in his 40's when i was born. He's now in his early 70's and just recently we were talking and he got real quiet and looked at me and said "All my friends are dying . . ." we talked about it for a while but it's hard for older guys. I think it's important to try and build your brotherhood to include people of a variety of ages. So that when your friends your age start dying you'll still have some younger guys around to lean on.
Tribal church team member here too. I’m the Senior Pastor there. I have guys I’ve done high risk/3-4 man team mission work in North Africa and other areas with for years. We are very close. We like Jeeps, Tacomas, guns, motorcycles and so we all connect on that level too. Time spent in-person with this small group is not constant because we are all married and have been for anywhere between 7 and 30 years depending on the brother, and we actually like our wives lol. We do stay in contact almost daily however by text etc.
Retired in 2010 and moved into the civilian world and it has been difficult.. Separated / Divorced in 2013 and have been alone ever since. I have work acquaintances and try to get out a little bit here and there, but haven't found the same level of friends that I had in the military. It's been 10 years on now and I am in my mid 50's now and don't know how to do it anymore so spend a ton of time feeling alone and in a void and, on the flip side, can only handle civilians in short periods... Sucks pretty much...
I'm sorry Stephen, you have got to have a church in your area with a church family that would love to talk with you, feed you, shovel your snow..... I have one that I can't believe how much they love. Please seek the family 🙏
Same here brother! Handful of bros i talk to but not regularly. Seems like people have checked out of brotherhood. Check out Mighty Oaks Foundation, Chad Robichaux
@@johnbarron1494 I appreciate the responses.. Happen to not be a religious person myself, so not really my scene. I've found that people just aren't invested in others as much as they used to be and I am sure I hold as much fault in being that way as others.
I agree! Times have changed alotin my 46 years. The right church can be your tribe! My wife and I have that here in southwest VA. I think the hard part of a tribe at church is the inability to recognize that generation gaps can be great.each generation helping the other grow. A great way to fix that difference and come together is getting a prayer warrior group together. An hour of praying one for another or really gathering around and praying forthat person needing help goes along way!
Funny thing is that the older I get those are the things I value the most. Having good people that you can depend on and the privilege of having them depend on you.
John, God bless you brother. What a great topic, that so may people are struggling for not having a tribe. That’s why God created us to live in community and serve one another. You hit the nail on the head.
I'm going to start saying that to people I haven't talked to in a while when they say "How's it going?" Me: "Everything is a disaster. Carry my emotional burdens!"
I'm single, retired & moved to a small community at the beginning of covid. Everything shut down. I've met several like minded people over last 2-1/2 years & have great neighbors but a "tribe" that's organized & train together? Not quite there yet. It is hard to do when an adult. Older adult even harder.
So spot on!!! Especially the latter section about people who want to identify as "whatever" and how others don't really care for them. Having recently retired and moved back to my hometown, I really recognize the difficulties of feeling isolated from my former tribe and the challenges of establishing a new tribe here. Bravo Zulu on putting forth quality content!!!
John I love your stuff! You should come out to Branson sometime! I work at sight & sound theatres. We do epic bible shows. I know you're into the arts. Would LOVE TO bless you and your family with some tickets.
Thank you for bringing this up. I have a best friend that’s been there for decades but life changes. I married a family and once my family was getting older he married and now has young kids of his own. They moved 40 miles away and we don’t hang out like we used to. The shoulder to shoulder thing and feelings might fall out along the way perfectly describes our relationship how we let life get in the way. Thank you for this episode and your introverted experiences
John, I need to start spending time with my Christian brothers again. During and after the covid shutdown, I just stopped seeing people. It was like a switch was flipped and I could not flip it back. Thanks for the encouragement to spend time with my friends again.
This concept is truly foreign to me. When I spent a short time thinking about it I cried because I feel it's something I'm incapable of having and living up to. Took me too long to realize how sabotaged I am in my development as a person and as a man. I just come home, do my chores and play video games. I'm not gonna give folks around me (coworkers) false expectations, just not capable of fulfilling obligations aside from my own survival, bills, holding down the job and little else. Just don't have it in me to make friends anymore.
You have identified the problem now identify a solution. You might be stunted in your development as a person but that doesn't mean it's over. I have struggled to make friends my whole life but I have made progress and so can you man. Find a church, volunteer, force yourself to talk to people. Its hard to learn, the process sucks but the fruits are worth it. Keep growing!
We are all at different places in life due to our experiences. Real life men aren't like high school or college people. Those cultures don't exist outside of those institutions. Don't go to church to find friends. Go to church to find God and your purpose. Friends will come naturally then. Also, playing video games to hide is like drinking alcohol to feel better. It makes everything worse. Sell it, take the money and get into the 2A Community. Get to know the guys at the local gun shops and ranges. The 2A communities come from ALL walks of life, and it's gaurenteed you will find someone worth hangin with. Best of luck bro. Don't give up 🤙🏼
Start by finding a hobby other than video games .. that’s a start … learn an instrument, learn a skill .. information is everywhere and generally free … look at how time is spent . It’s your most valuable asset.
When I hang out shoulder to shoulder with the other guys it's nice to be in prayer it's nice to be on outreach reaching others for Christ appreciate your video John and all the other guys that are there keep making great videos
I’ll have to watch this one a few times. Too many good points to absorb in half an hour. Very very well done men. I appreciate all the insight, and the way y’all communicate in a meaningful way. Thank you !
This was a great topic! I for one am an introvert and I've been burned in Friendship before so it's hard to depend on others you need any situation. I'm really trying to be here within the last year to get out more and become more active in the church which I also agree is a great place to meet with people then have the same values as you do. I got hurt on the job 7 years back and I've got to the point where I can't work anymore and I lost some good friends because of that. I believe that the wait times are now in this country has got we need to have attacked group of people buddies that have each other's back for all kinds of reasons! I appreciate the shows from this to home defense and everything in between. Thank you all for your service! As far as I'm concerned, it has continued to this day in every video, idea, speech, etc. that you use to make a positive influence on the people you come in contact with. God bless you and everyone involved in the services you give to all who listen and respect your morals and beliefs!
I'm a woman and feel I have only "work friends "that are not reliable or really there for me. They would not come to my aide if I needed help. So I guess I'm a true loner. It's OK. I trust myself.
I have thinking about this a lot lately. I had a tribe, but most of them have moved away the past several years. I’ve been realizing I need to branch out and make friends again. And I agree that church is a key place to do that. If you agree on the fundamentals of the faith and are both seeking to be better Christians, you are bound to agree on a lot more
I knew my best friend was trustworthy when I asked him "what would you say if you knew I killed someone?" and he replied: "What do you want to do with the body?"
John mentioned it briefly but it’s something worth noting. Being the boss or in any type of leadership adds more difficulty to this equation. Everyone knows that leader ship is a lonely place because you don’t want to get too close to people you might have to discipline or not discipline, and be accused of favoritism. The higher up in whatever organization you belong to you achieve the fewer and fewer peers you have, and in today’s society if we spend a large portion of our time at work. I think that’s why being involved in organizations outside of work especially the church is so important. This was a great episode. I hope you continue to put out content like this.
Hopefully I can find a tribe. I’m a single parent, Asian Mom that’s into guns. It’s just hard to make friends, in general. I find that I can’t stand most people 😂 But honestly, I need to make at least 1 friend, to take to the range, because that’s the rule lol
@@rickysand1900 Hi Ricky, that’s a good question- I haven’t even thought to look into that. I am having a hard time finding any kind of gun club near here. I’m in Northern CA. Thank you for your suggestion, I will make more of an effort 😬
Thank you guys for talking about this. My circle of friends was/is small but since I've moved across country, away from friends and family, I'm starting the understand how loneliness can eat away at you when you're starting over. As an extreme introvert who works from home remotely and has a family, its clear I need to get out of my comfort zone and meet ppl. Thanks for the honesty and the laughs. I hope everyone finds their tribe sooner than later.
I've never had a tribe. I am also deeply introverted as is my own family, who I haven't spoken to in over 3 years. I have a coworker that I go to the range with on occasion but that is sparce. So to interact with other men feels bizarre and I overthink every little thing and end up being to uptight or to laid-back. To a point where I'm not my self for fear of upsetting my friend and having them ditch me. So I pretty much just avoid the whole tribe thing.
Especially hard for me to find a "band of brothers" as a nursing student. There are 19 people in my class, and 18 of them are female. It's next to impossible to find guys, even at a Catholic college. I am part of a group of guys from church, but I never have time to spend with them, and the last time I did see them, the de facto leader of the group basically spat in my face and told me I'm a horrible person because I did something he didn't like.
I remember those days. I worked as a male RN for about 15 years before I had the chance to get into the PA program. I've also had some trouble with other men not liking what I do for a living. My advice would be to ignore them. They don't pay your bills and they can't argue that your income isn't good. I have had much better luck making friends with Doctors and Surgical Techs since becoming a PA. My best friend now is an Old Vietnam DevilDoc that's about half crazy, lol. The Doc has been teaching myself and a few others how to handle medical emergencies in sub-third world conditions with very limited modern resources. We all figure our medical skills will only be useful in a SHTF situation if we are actually able to apply the skills with whatever resources are on hand. Just keep yours eyes open man. Ignore the asshats and you may have fewer friends, but you will have higher quality friends. Best of luck
Realize it may not be the same but don't discount female friends. Granted, if married, must be aware of the dynamics but some of us ladies enjoy shooting, hunting, etc the same as the guys.
I believe having a “ band of brothers “ is very important not only for SHTF but for everyday life. But like many of the comments, I too have found it very hard to establish a very close friendship with anyone thst I can call a brother. To those on here like me, it’s not you and not having a “ band of brothers “ is not the end of the world. Learning to take care of issues, deal with problems and cope with everyday life by yourself, is an asset. I’ve gotten very used to either doing things myself or paying someone to do something. Being self sufficient has actually made me stronger, smarter and more confident. Let me be clear, I have friends and acquaintances, I’m not a hermit or live under a rock but I don’t consider anyone of them a “ band of brothers “
My band of brothers was my co workers for years. Many couldn't understand why I drove a hour plus to work one way daily. I got paid to "hang out" with my best friends doing what I literally love to do as a Drywall contractor. I still have that option and use it. However I don't do it daily anymore and work solo most of the time. It's much more difficult on my own and even more difficult to find that connection where I am now.
I retired in my late 50s and moved out of state. It is very hard to "make friends" . I'm active in some things but these are people I'm friendly with but not friends. I lost my work friends. This created a huge void. Very involved in church but my denomination does not lend itself to socialization. It's an odd place to be in life.
Don't feel like you are alone in this. I am in the same boat. Left the Marines decades ago. Retired, moved back to my home town. Have people I am friendly with, but NO FRIENDS. My BROTHERS from the Corps are few left. My BROTHER is my youngest son.
Another great video - and I whole-heartedly agree with your perspective on this. Over the course of my life, my best and closest friends have come into my life through CrossFit and martial arts. Any activity that pushes you to be better tomorrow than you are today, helps you become comfortable being uncomfortable, and introduces you to healthy, industrious, like-minded folks, is worth undertaking. “Steel sharpens steel.” I’m not a church-goer, but I grew up in a Christian home, and have always appreciated the strong emphasis on family and community invariably found in Christian congregations. Keep up the excellent work, Warrior-Poets. Your message is both important and timely. Cheers! 🍻
If grid goes down you’re stuck with those that are literally closest to you. Unfortunately our fellow Americans may not all be warrior poets. I’ll pray for you and for myself we find that. I’m in you boat brother. Forever. I’m just not with you and I’m sorry it’s that way
John and Guys. Excellent video, covers soo much great stuff! Our young generation needs to adhere to your points. Myself, I have been guilty of some of your points I have grown to be come a better person. Thanks so much for what you do at Warrior Poet. God Bless!
It's great to hear that I am not the only one who has struggled with wanting to be by myself since I got out. Thanks for being so honest. I need to get into a good church to find more people like me.
Like others here, my church security team is my band of brothers & my tribe. We are intimately close in a toxically masculine sort of way. But we became this close knit group organically, it was not programmed or structured. Our tribe has been noticed by our church, and there have been efforts to duplicate our fellowship in an intentional structured way, but those efforts fizzled out. I believe the Holy Spirit bonded us into the great team that we have become. We also attempt to include younger men in our security ministry and mentor them to be Godly men. Iron sharpens iron. Love your channel.
This is the best episode John has ever done. It is really hard finding a tribe after getting out. The guy down below that said we should have local WPS meet ups is spot on. I always nod to the fellas I see wearing the t-shirt or hat.
Love my church, but challenging to find my band of brothers. I thought I did but the pandemic exposed extreme fear and that armor of God had suddenly disappeared. I took my armor, (reluctantly) and moved on. Still loving my God and attending Church. Thanks John. God bless you and the Family, and the WPS Crew.
John, I served in a local service club doing projects in the community. That introduced me to really quality people for 8 years.. Mine was time with a lions club, but there are other service clubs.
You are the first I've heard mention warm weather folks no working as hard in contrast with the north. Yes, it was so frustrating to call a business to get anything done! 2 weeks later ya get a call back for an appointment.
Thanks John, I agree 100% and thanks for reminding me to make this a priority. I have some people in mind but need to make the effort to initiate setting up something together to strengthen that bond like getting the families together, getting involved in the church, or setting a day to hit the range together.
Definitely good to have a group of people you can rely on but I think it's also important to expose yourself to new people outside of your tribe to get new perspectives and avoid tunnel vision in life
The “typical male routine” but definitely hit the nail on the head. Also, the description of the friend that should be part of your tribe motivates me to to reconnect with a buddy that I haven’t heard from in a few years. He’s the guy that would tell me the hard truth and punch me in the nose to keep me from screwing up.
Excited for this episode. As almost 30 y/o, and working from home now, the routine of gym and otherwise being home with the family doesn't lend much to connecting with brothers. I am also of the opinion that rural people, as I am one, by default are more standoffish and skeptical of connecting with others. They/we are often self sufficient to some degree and untrusting of others who may compromise that. But, if you can connect over shared interests, you wont find a better group. Excited to hear your take, and find my group too!
"Won't find your band attending church, but serving in the church" fully agree! I run our church security team, and those guys are becoming my tribe.
Exact same scenario for me as well.
Unfortunately we have a Fed on our church security team🙄. Therefore I cannot be involved. I do not allow feds of any kind in my circle of trust. They are not family or freedom safe.
I do have a tribe but it’s more like the last of the Mohicans. Too few of us.
@@inertiallychallenged #METOO
Same here. My church team is my tribe
When he started talking about developing a tribe with people at church this is immediately what I thought of. I have noticed a tribe developing in our security team.
The only thing I wish is there were more people around my age. The average age of people in that group is probably 20 years older than me.
This episode made me brake down. I have no band of brothers, my wife dose not have a band of sisters. Our family is struggling, and our marriage is falling apart. my family, my wife, our marriage need some serious prayers. as well as my self.
For me, participating in the church, just like they said in this video really helped. Attended for 5 years but it was first when I actually started to help them plan events, renovate the church etc, that I started to get friends.
I started going to church in the past few months, and have found a good and faithful tribe. God led me and my schizophrenic daughter there. I have been isolated for 2 decades, no friends, no fellowship, but God led me there, and I KNOW He did. I have no other family but my daughters, and one of them is estranged from me bc of major family dysfunction and narcissism . I'm separated from my husband bc of his personality disorder!! God miraculously gave me a wonderful support system- to be blessed by and to bless!! God Is GOOD!!😊❤
Hope you’re hanging tough and finding love of your God while finding love for yourself. You’ve got brothers right here.
Just sent a prayer up for you man. I don’t know you, but the Lord does. I don’t know what’s going on in your life, but the Lord does. Find a spiritually alive church. If you have question reply here, and I’d be happy to talk. God bless!
brother, no it's not. It only stops when we stop trying. Gather strength, focus on health. Rest is a must. But i feel you. I feel like finally me and my wife are starting to get over our biggest speed bump and looking back, i see how easily we could have broken up if i succumbed to defeat. You got this!
I haven't had friends since 2015, I NEEDED this. Gonna go to a boxing club tomorrow and see how it goes, I have nothing to lose. Thank you John.
Don't set yourself up for disappointment. Sorry to sound so blackpilled, but the majority of people out there won't even risk their social media account for you, let alone their job or even life. There is no such thing as tribe in the modern world, with the exception of your children. Even your woman is likely to walk in today's world. The only actual successful tribe out there, are the elite's of the nations, and the small rebel groups out there, like the Taliban.
Jiujitsu, or general MMA (which will include jiujitsu) would probably be better. It's a softer/friendlier practice, and people tend to get together at house parties for watching UFC events.
@@c3bhm I do actually have a few Jiu Jitsu clubs in my town so maybe I will check them out instead, thanks for the suggestion man.
@c3bhm Now, now.. you can't be suggesting alien philosophy to John's tribe. Eastern martial arts brings the wisdom of the Tao which I compliment you for attempting to save the young men from these Nazis. John's philosophy is that you have to worship Big Daddy in the Sky to be a Good American. John probably thinks that Taoism is a Communist invention. Don't you be indoctrinating his followers with any of those ideas... makes it hard to turn them into stone cold killers.
Same boat brother. I have cigar shop friends, gym acquaintances. A few dinner couple friends. But I don’t really have a one and one friend and havnt had that for about 30 years
Have y'all considered creating a Warrior Poet community... with local chapters... Could even be an NPO... you could be the connection point for thousands of tribes across the country. I'd be down... even if there were a nominal membership fee.
That would be pretty cool! Hope they see this and work towards that.
Mike glover was doing basically that and that got him targeted by feds if I’m not mistaken.
Yeah, probably. Gov is probing deep these days
I gotta say i'd love an online group that lets you find like minded folks in your area! but the feds would probably use it as a way to keep track of those of us that love freedom . . .
@@JDStone-jg8cg if you don't think they're already monitoring channels like these you're fooling yourself. :)
John- everything yall said describes me. Very hard to find band of brothers with the weekly routine of sleep, eat, go to work, and repeat it all over again. John thanks for being a ray of hope in a sea of despair. Please setup an online community and I'm there. Also, I'd like to come and hang out with you guys.
I'll second Eric's sentiments. Keep up the great work John and Warrior Poet team!
An online community to connect and find others in my area would be huge.
Same
Same.. that would be great to connect ... currently looking for a tribe
It's honestly difficult to find others with a similar mindset
It's important for us as wives to encourage our husbands to find a good group of male friends. Also,
I would love to hear from the wives how they have found their 'tribes' when moving to a new location. Love your channel!
I'd give you two thumbs up if I could.
This would make an excellent thread over at the WPSN forums. Appreciate your comment here.
There’s a saying, happy wife happy life and that 100% works the other way too.
It’s in a relationships best interest to encourage your partner to have a solid group of friends and a few outlets that don’t always involve our partners 👍👍👍
We got adopted in by our new neighbors. Been to lots of feast meals with at least 45 of their relatives. They've helped us build buildings pour concrete brought us free pipe water tanks fences welding jobs. Best move ever! Growing big love for my village.
My man's band of brothers moved all over the country last year and I have been telling him he needs to find a new group but he refuses.
This is why I am so grateful to be part of a church that takes fellowship very seriously
"Men connect side by side doing something together."
That's correct, in my experience. A family friend of mine and I are super close because we do construction together. Although I'm 30 and he's pushing 70, I enjoy the time spent learning from an older generation man and shooting the breeze as we work side by side. We don't hangout and talk outside of work, but we sure talk a lot when we have tools in our hands. It's a positive experience I wouldn't give up for the world.
This is all so true. Our men absolutely need a band of brothers...and has brought to my attention we women need a circle of sisters of like minds as well. My husband and I need to work on this. Thanks for this guys. Good stuff here. Blessings to you all.
I've heard it from my wife more times than I can count.
Try to engage in conversations about certain topics, "you need a boyfriend".
I found a new “band of brothers” by doing my own thing and just chatting about it. I started with raising my own beef and that brought in a few like minded folk. Then butchering chickens brought more. Then , and more people came along. We’re all trading and canning food for ourselves and growing. It’s awesome!!
This video hit the nail on the head for me. Unfortunately as a single guy with no kids it’s even more difficult sometimes.
This!
Camping is a great way to find a tribe.
Clicks lots of boxes…
Getting along for long periods of time. Cooking and planning, elements/weather, sharing resources.
I thought that was a really weird comment until I realized that most people don't associate camping with solo backpacking.
It’s easier in smaller towns and more rural areas , my band is small but it’s a mixed of family and friends that have similar interest from the church and work . Guys and gals who enjoy hunting , fishing to shooting and bring prepared to help each other . Getting our entire families together to not only enjoy each others company but to build the trust that we will be there for each other no matter what!
Unless you are a refugee from a state that’s not favorable. It’s easy when you are from the small town and have built in family, etc. Interesting times.
@@tedcarl5382 I have to agree. Been in this town for 16 years, retired 3 years ago and started walking my dog. I still get people assuming I'm some homeless guy walking through town. ($1500 purebred hunting dog) I didn't have a kid play sports in town, I did go to a local church, but left when I was found to be too conservative in my biblical interpretation. (Imagine expecting elders to support tithing.)
I feel really fortunate in this area of life. I have a group of 7 buds. We all grew up together, played sports, spent time outdoors, shooting guns etc. After high school we all served missions for our church. Even with all the ups and down of life and growing our own families we have stuck together and recently formed our own little warrior poet group. I have always believed our brotherhood was divinely created. I know having a brotherhood is essential for every man to have if they want to live their best life.
Epic!
this hits home very much for me. as an adult in a city i didnt grow up in, its very hard to build a band of brothers.
Same here.
I'm thinking of retiring early just to go back home (no jobs except local hospital & old folks home) but I get along with most everyone when I go visit .... even ppl I didn't grow up with and don't know well.
This is a message desperately needed and far too often overlooked.
My tribe came to life when I joined a volunteer fire department. A group of men and women all focused on the same mission and having fun together.
Agreed that's how I found my tribe
23:49 “someone who would risk their relationship with you to tell you something you don’t wanna hear”
Straight GOLD
Yep. Just recently cost myself a relationship doing this. But the right people appreciate the honesty and use it to improve. Truth is power.
I love how authentic this is. Who knew other guys went through this? We've had the good fortune to find an awesome church here in central NC, and I fully know that most of the problems I've got connecting and making friends is me.
Great thought provoking show though, so thank you!
Found my band serving with team rubicon. Many other veterans, common purpose helping others and doing good in places that need it. Great show guys. Keep it up.
Man! I feel like the oddball out now. In my 57 years, I’ve had tried multiple times to have a band of brothers in different aspects and activities in my life, but they have always let me down. I though we were tight, then either someone or a few of them have always let me down and made me not want to hang out with them. It makes me think “friends? Who needs them?” Because when you have friends and it always works out to where they want something from you. They get needy. And if you turn them down for a hang because I’m spending time with y family or just to relax by yourself, they get jealous and pissy like a chick and get mad. I’d be happy in a small cabin in the mountains somewhere far away from everyone. That’s my idea of happiness. I guess I’m a loner.
the gym is the only place I think I can find quality tribe. Gotta work hard by yourself and show up, then you’re on the table as an option.
After moving country it’s been hard to make friends that don’t just use you for there purpose for you to be there for them but not if you need them I think it’s easier to say who need friends so I miss friends yes 100% but I don’t want fake ones either
Suffering has made you seek solace in your own company, its only an issue if its an issue. Acquaintances make the best friends.
i hear ya man
Same
I have self taught, via UA-cam flint knapping, woodcarving, gun safety, and am working on pottery now, but I would love doing it with others. Like I wish I had a group to camp and work on survival skills, shelter building, and cooking out doors. Foraging, gardening, and hunting, are some productive things, that are practical and interesting.
my wife and I went to church regularly for about 10 years and we didn't meet anyone. we forced ourselves to go to Sunday school as well and I (nearly) instantly had 3 lifelong friends.
so important to get into those small groups that facilitate actually speaking to each other.
Your story is a common issue in churches. Our own church (I work on staff there) has talked about how some people attend for a long time and was never greeted by a staff member. So we're actively working on creating that community mindset and get to try and make everyone feel welcome as they come in the door!
The key to community is intentionality. You can have all the desire in the world to build a community but if the other people are not wanting to put forward the same effort there’s nothing you can do to change that and you’ll fight a futile battle. Intentional community building takes mutual sacrifice to spend time together and take time away from other things. And in todays American culture we pride ourselves in staying busy and it makes it difficult to unplug , slowdown, and connect with people
Only time I REALLY felt I had a tribe was in the service . Tried to find it but sadly realised that in civvy street it is not the same. When I got divorced I lost even that. I moved every 2 years from 6 to 26. I then moved , jobs professions, churches, I no longer have a faith. So I have no group. I just found an amazing fiance. So its her and the dogs!
Oh, man. The timing of this video. I recently sold my house in Nevada, and am moving to Tennessee. I have no family or friends there. My wife and I just want a change of pace (country living). The thought has crossed my mind about leaving the people I know in Nevada, to living in a place where I have to start over. This video made me realize that I'm not alone in thinking it could be difficult, but it's doable. I am a church person. I play drums on my worship team, and hope to join a worship team wherever I land. I LOVE playing drums, and hope to connect with members of a new team. I just found that people in church can put on a "church face" and be different in church than they are outside of church. It takes time to weed those people out and find the people who are straight forward and real on Sunday as well as the rest of the week.
Very on point! I am a Drug and Alcohol Therapist and I use this concept constantly in my work. I always recommend finding a “tribe” by following your interests. For instance, I like hunting and fishing. I joined the local Rod and Gun Club, made friends there, and have since developed a Youth Shooting Sports program with some of those guys..I also Made really good friends in AA as well when I first sobered off…. Found those who were interested in the same stuff in AA, and spend a lot of time hunting and fishing with a few of those dudes. I balance those things with family and work…
This is such a powerful message being talked about here. I love it.
All great points. As a dad of 3 boys (15,16,19), and a husband, making the time is so hard. I feel guilty taking time away from my family, to do other things. Not because they guilt me, it’s just not easy to pull away for stuff like this.
I agree. What I don’t understand is how dads follow their kids around to all their various activities but kids don’t do dad like things i.e. hunting, hiking, lifting weights, competitive, shooting sports it’s almost like society has made lose what we used to have an United States
automotive tuning and aftermarket hobby is another one to meet friends. Everyone, from racing, to street, to off road, to everything in-between.
My friends are part of my network but to be a real brother you need to live with that person. Even if it's only one week a year on a camping trip. I've moved a lot and what I do to meet new people is attend things that interest me (farmers markets, volunteering at a food bank, pole dancing class, stuff like that).
Pole dancing class huh? Sweet!
It's odd. Here's how it went down for me. I come home from war and go to the VFW that my grandfather was a member at. Get carded, proof that I'm legit, they let me in. I get a beer at the bar and watch tv for an hour or so. Not a SINGLE person said a word to me. A room full of old vets. No younger guys to be found. I leave. Welp, so much for the VFW. I go to the VA and they're awesome. BUT STILL, it's like the old vets keep to themselves and it's just the younger Desert Storm and 9/11 vets that buddy up. Even then, it's just a doctor's appointment, so no deep or meaningful bonds are being formed. I decided an office job wasn't for me and wanted to get back into uniform. I used my GI Bill for Law Enforcement. I loved it. Very close knit and I'd like to think that I (and others like me) made it a bit closer. I was an FTO at the end and every rookie I trained, I drilled it into his/her head that everyone in the "First Responder Community" is our family. That firefighter over there, he's your brother. That paramedic, she's your sister. The 911 call center, brothers and sisters. That CO. Brother. Nurse. Sister. You get the picture. Most of these first responders are all veterans of our past 20 years of war and the "family" sentiment has run much deeper. We even have a first responder flag now. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. Before I retired, I hung the flag next to our time clock. The ritual goes like this. Punch the clock, slap the flag (like tagging into the fight like a wrestling match, but also, it connects you to all of the other first responders under that flag), and then enter the gates of hell (at the jail) and go to work. Last time I visited, that first responder flag was still there next to the time clock. 🥰
Oh hello this the real world. In the real world veterans don’t care about each other one bit
As a fulltime firefighter I'm very happy to hear that you taught the rookies that. I do the same with my rookie firefighters. We are all a part of the first responder family. You don't pick who is in your family like you do your friends, but they are your family, and family always needs to be there for one another.
i need a tribe
Same
Same. Anyone in PNW?
Same. Abq, NM.
Won't find it online, brother. Period. Like finding a wife in a bar.
Same
Thank you for this. After taking off my uniform in 2006, I have not made real friends - tons of acquaintances yes, but I do not believe any of them would stand with me in righteousness as my uniformed band of brothers did all those years ago. This is because all of the people I know now have never served anything greater than themselves (they are all civilians).
Updated: I agree with the sentiment at 10:45 - One of the reasons I believe my family has with not being able to truly connect with civilians is they do not champion work or work ethics. Since 2006 I have worked 6-7 days a week for 10-14 hours each day because I enjoy work. My neighbors do call and ask what my family is doing ‘later today’ as they would like to come over and hang out. We say “Sounds great, come on by! We are building furniture, or we are cutting down trees, or stripping the kitchen walls and installing new wiring - always work related things”. The neighbors decide they are not into work and towards the end of the phone call they say they are just going to stay home and watch TV or play video games. My family does not enjoy watching anything on TV (because TV is an indoctrination tool nor do we wish to waste time playing a video game because there are so many productive things we could be doing with our limited time on Earth. We simply do not connect with the civilian populations we have moved into. We too have moved 7 times across 3 states since 2009’s planned economic crash and it is the same story everywhere we go. I always offer my knowledge and skillset to rebuild their crumbling deck, or I offer to help them gut a room and redesign in but that is always too much work the civvies we move next to in every community we move to.
One thing I am lacking after I retired. THE TRIBE! Need to work on this! Thanks!
I started my ministry for just this reason. We're called Men's Ethos Network. We talk about your squad all the time. You're on the right track,
What a great video! Lots of us guys need a tribe.
Bravo!!! I am a man who lives alone. I realized that I have a band of brothers. Truly. I will not take that for granted anymore.
I will actually and knowingly engage better.
Thank you guys!
I feel like I can relate to John in so many ways. I’m an introvert but I’m in sales so my job is talking and meeting with people all day. After my job is done, I just want to crawl into my own space and that’s why I enjoy eating alone. Gives me time to rest and regroup. The rest of my time is spent with my wife, family, church, hobbies, and dog. It’s hard to free up time for the brothers esp since were all spread out far now.
I am introvert as well. I do the same thing just differently. A big problem is that the world gets bigger it is more tough to have that group. It seems like we like the world smaller or everything is being moved around too much. I think there is a John Denver song Rocky Mountain High that is in the begging. Was JD an introvert?
Great topic. As we get older it definitely gets considerably more difficult to make new friends that actually become close and highly trusted.
This is certainly something we all need to consider in our personal quests to take care of ourselves, our families, and our communities.
Man this hits home for me. I have three friends that I have known since the late 80's and went to school with, but we live all over the country. We get together weekly to record a Star Wars podcast, and that is a lot of fun, but I don't see them often. I could really use having them be near. It's tough as an adult...
It is so encouraging to hear other men be true men warrior and poet
I've made a good buddy of a coworker of my wife by running. We run, we chat about our lives, we exchange prayer requests. The running is our excuse, and the friendship followed. I've also found that my relationships with my dad, my brother, and my father-in-law are best built with side-by-side activity. And yes about serving in the church, you can't just show up, listen to the service, and leave. Gotta invest yourself in the family. Good video!
Former military, traveled most of my life, involved most of my life in church, train tactics all the time, my Band of Brothers are who I train with and the men at church. I read the Bible everyday and in spite of all I do I do much alone. I know who I can depend on and those who call on me I am there. I am comfortable being alone, besides not many guys my age can hang. I thoroughly enjoy watching your videos…happy for your success. Keep up the great work and thanks in more ways than you know for sharing the gospel.🙏😇❤️😎
I loved this one. I have zero friends. After I grew up, got married and we had kids, all my “buddies” weren’t ready for that and we just went separate ways. I would absolutely love to have a good group of buddies to shoot with, buy stupid unnecessary gear with, see who can get more ammo, train with, prepare with and just all that awesome freedom stuff lol. Anybody in East Tennessee who wants a tribe, hit me up! 😂😂
Virginia here, more towards the southwest, but.. 🤷🏼♂️ I need buddies to go shoot with, and build with, but as a father, and husband, it can b very difficult to find anytime for “buddy’s to shoot/train, and go rucking with… but I do know, I need that in my life haha it’s just hard to find time when you have a family and actually care haha
@@ericcole5507 you got that right brother. I’m pretty close to the Virginia line. I’m close to the gate city area.
West Tennessee here… great idea!
@@joeb2526 well, worst case scenario, we can all meet up if shit hits the fan 🤣🤣
What actually caused you guys to go your separate ways? Because I have a friend who got married and had kids recently while the rest of us are single. We still invite him but obviously he's usually busy so inevitably I expect he will fade out of contact
Amen brother keep up the great work and honesty I as a man can assure you that most of us if not all love the truth you speak and can fully relate. Much more good done than "harm"
Great subject that never gets talked about. We are definitely in the lone wolf era. I'll throw another reason out. Age. As an aging fella death is a reality when it comes to friends. Unfortunately I lost my only true bros in the last 5 years. Good job on the topic guys.
My dad was in his 40's when i was born. He's now in his early 70's and just recently we were talking and he got real quiet and looked at me and said "All my friends are dying . . ." we talked about it for a while but it's hard for older guys. I think it's important to try and build your brotherhood to include people of a variety of ages. So that when your friends your age start dying you'll still have some younger guys around to lean on.
Tribal church team member here too. I’m the Senior Pastor there. I have guys I’ve done high risk/3-4 man team mission work in North Africa and other areas with for years. We are very close. We like Jeeps, Tacomas, guns, motorcycles and so we all connect on that level too. Time spent in-person with this small group is not constant because we are all married and have been for anywhere between 7 and 30 years depending on the brother, and we actually like our wives lol. We do stay in contact almost daily however by text etc.
Retired in 2010 and moved into the civilian world and it has been difficult.. Separated / Divorced in 2013 and have been alone ever since. I have work acquaintances and try to get out a little bit here and there, but haven't found the same level of friends that I had in the military. It's been 10 years on now and I am in my mid 50's now and don't know how to do it anymore so spend a ton of time feeling alone and in a void and, on the flip side, can only handle civilians in short periods... Sucks pretty much...
Damn man, I'm sorry to hear that. For whatever it's worth - I'll pray for you 😬
Do a christian retreat for men. Youll find brothers.
I'm sorry Stephen, you have got to have a church in your area with a church family that would love to talk with you, feed you, shovel your snow..... I have one that I can't believe how much they love. Please seek the family 🙏
Same here brother! Handful of bros i talk to but not regularly. Seems like people have checked out of brotherhood. Check out Mighty Oaks Foundation, Chad Robichaux
@@johnbarron1494 I appreciate the responses.. Happen to not be a religious person myself, so not really my scene. I've found that people just aren't invested in others as much as they used to be and I am sure I hold as much fault in being that way as others.
I agree! Times have changed alotin my 46 years. The right church can be your tribe! My wife and I have that here in southwest VA. I think the hard part of a tribe at church is the inability to recognize that generation gaps can be great.each generation helping the other grow. A great way to fix that difference and come together is getting a prayer warrior group together. An hour of praying one for another or really gathering around and praying forthat person needing help goes along way!
Funny thing is that the older I get those are the things I value the most. Having good people that you can depend on and the privilege of having them depend on you.
John, God bless you brother. What a great topic, that so may people are struggling for not having a tribe. That’s why God created us to live in community and serve one another. You hit the nail on the head.
I'm going to start saying that to people I haven't talked to in a while when they say "How's it going?"
Me: "Everything is a disaster. Carry my emotional burdens!"
i know so many people that complain they don't have friends but won't do the work to have friends. Its a lot of work to maintain any relationship
I'm single, retired & moved to a small community at the beginning of covid. Everything shut down. I've met several like minded people over last 2-1/2 years & have great neighbors but a "tribe" that's organized & train together? Not quite there yet. It is hard to do when an adult. Older adult even harder.
So spot on!!! Especially the latter section about people who want to identify as "whatever" and how others don't really care for them. Having recently retired and moved back to my hometown, I really recognize the difficulties of feeling isolated from my former tribe and the challenges of establishing a new tribe here. Bravo Zulu on putting forth quality content!!!
John I love your stuff! You should come out to Branson sometime! I work at sight & sound theatres. We do epic bible shows. I know you're into the arts. Would LOVE TO bless you and your family with some tickets.
Thank you for bringing this up. I have a best friend that’s been there for decades but life changes. I married a family and once my family was getting older he married and now has young kids of his own. They moved 40 miles away and we don’t hang out like we used to. The shoulder to shoulder thing and feelings might fall out along the way perfectly describes our relationship how we let life get in the way. Thank you for this episode and your introverted experiences
My Church family is also my tribe/band of brothers. Always there for me as I am for them.
John, I need to start spending time with my Christian brothers again. During and after the covid shutdown, I just stopped seeing people. It was like a switch was flipped and I could not flip it back. Thanks for the encouragement to spend time with my friends again.
This concept is truly foreign to me. When I spent a short time thinking about it I cried because I feel it's something I'm incapable of having and living up to. Took me too long to realize how sabotaged I am in my development as a person and as a man.
I just come home, do my chores and play video games. I'm not gonna give folks around me (coworkers) false expectations, just not capable of fulfilling obligations aside from my own survival, bills, holding down the job and little else. Just don't have it in me to make friends anymore.
You have identified the problem now identify a solution. You might be stunted in your development as a person but that doesn't mean it's over. I have struggled to make friends my whole life but I have made progress and so can you man. Find a church, volunteer, force yourself to talk to people. Its hard to learn, the process sucks but the fruits are worth it. Keep growing!
We are all at different places in life due to our experiences. Real life men aren't like high school or college people. Those cultures don't exist outside of those institutions.
Don't go to church to find friends. Go to church to find God and your purpose. Friends will come naturally then.
Also, playing video games to hide is like drinking alcohol to feel better. It makes everything worse. Sell it, take the money and get into the 2A Community. Get to know the guys at the local gun shops and ranges. The 2A communities come from ALL walks of life, and it's gaurenteed you will find someone worth hangin with.
Best of luck bro. Don't give up 🤙🏼
Start by finding a hobby other than video games .. that’s a start … learn an instrument, learn a skill .. information is everywhere and generally free … look at how time is spent . It’s your most valuable asset.
Find a church and become a member, volunteer. God works in our hearts when we are obedient to his word.
When I hang out shoulder to shoulder with the other guys it's nice to be in prayer it's nice to be on outreach reaching others for Christ appreciate your video John and all the other guys that are there keep making great videos
DO NOT MISS THE CHANCE FOR EPISODE “007” to be about spy stuff.
Most of us just want to survive... u want spy tools? Think about that request
You really think he hasn't been planning that since the beginning??? lol
I’ll have to watch this one a few times. Too many good points to absorb in half an hour. Very very well done men. I appreciate all the insight, and the way y’all communicate in a meaningful way. Thank you !
I have a church family that is absolutely amazing.
This was a great topic! I for one am an introvert and I've been burned in Friendship before so it's hard to depend on others you need any situation. I'm really trying to be here within the last year to get out more and become more active in the church which I also agree is a great place to meet with people then have the same values as you do. I got hurt on the job 7 years back and I've got to the point where I can't work anymore and I lost some good friends because of that. I believe that the wait times are now in this country has got we need to have attacked group of people buddies that have each other's back for all kinds of reasons! I appreciate the shows from this to home defense and everything in between. Thank you all for your service! As far as I'm concerned, it has continued to this day in every video, idea, speech, etc. that you use to make a positive influence on the people you come in contact with. God bless you and everyone involved in the services you give to all who listen and respect your morals and beliefs!
I'm a woman and feel I have only "work friends "that are not reliable or really there for me. They would not come to my aide if I needed help. So I guess I'm a true loner. It's OK. I trust myself.
I don't talk about many off limit / taboo things at work, so how close can they really be?
I’m the same way. Somebody should get all the people in this situation together in different regions.
I have thinking about this a lot lately. I had a tribe, but most of them have moved away the past several years. I’ve been realizing I need to branch out and make friends again. And I agree that church is a key place to do that. If you agree on the fundamentals of the faith and are both seeking to be better Christians, you are bound to agree on a lot more
I knew my best friend was trustworthy when I asked him "what would you say if you knew I killed someone?" and he replied: "What do you want to do with the body?"
WTF? You wanted to sleep with a dead body?
John mentioned it briefly but it’s something worth noting. Being the boss or in any type of leadership adds more difficulty to this equation. Everyone knows that leader ship is a lonely place because you don’t want to get too close to people you might have to discipline or not discipline, and be accused of favoritism. The higher up in whatever organization you belong to you achieve the fewer and fewer peers you have, and in today’s society if we spend a large portion of our time at work. I think that’s why being involved in organizations outside of work especially the church is so important. This was a great episode. I hope you continue to put out content like this.
Hopefully I can find a tribe. I’m a single parent, Asian Mom that’s into guns. It’s just hard to make friends, in general. I find that I can’t stand most people 😂 But honestly, I need to make at least 1 friend, to take to the range, because that’s the rule lol
Is there a local ‘Girls With Gun’ organization/chapter near you? Like minded people most likely.
Should be easy for you, if you will date a white guy. If you only accept Asian men....well good luck lol.
@@rickysand1900 Hi Ricky, that’s a good question- I haven’t even thought to look into that. I am having a hard time finding any kind of gun club near here. I’m in Northern CA. Thank you for your suggestion, I will make more of an effort 😬
I can't help you, but know that you are AWESOME!
Thank you guys for talking about this. My circle of friends was/is small but since I've moved across country, away from friends and family, I'm starting the understand how loneliness can eat away at you when you're starting over. As an extreme introvert who works from home remotely and has a family, its clear I need to get out of my comfort zone and meet ppl. Thanks for the honesty and the laughs. I hope everyone finds their tribe sooner than later.
I've never had a tribe. I am also deeply introverted as is my own family, who I haven't spoken to in over 3 years. I have a coworker that I go to the range with on occasion but that is sparce. So to interact with other men feels bizarre and I overthink every little thing and end up being to uptight or to laid-back. To a point where I'm not my self for fear of upsetting my friend and having them ditch me. So I pretty much just avoid the whole tribe thing.
Next week I'm teaching my youth group what a real strong man looks like warrior and poet physically mentally emotionally and spiritually
Especially hard for me to find a "band of brothers" as a nursing student. There are 19 people in my class, and 18 of them are female. It's next to impossible to find guys, even at a Catholic college. I am part of a group of guys from church, but I never have time to spend with them, and the last time I did see them, the de facto leader of the group basically spat in my face and told me I'm a horrible person because I did something he didn't like.
I remember those days. I worked as a male RN for about 15 years before I had the chance to get into the PA program. I've also had some trouble with other men not liking what I do for a living. My advice would be to ignore them. They don't pay your bills and they can't argue that your income isn't good. I have had much better luck making friends with Doctors and Surgical Techs since becoming a PA. My best friend now is an Old Vietnam DevilDoc that's about half crazy, lol. The Doc has been teaching myself and a few others how to handle medical emergencies in sub-third world conditions with very limited modern resources. We all figure our medical skills will only be useful in a SHTF situation if we are actually able to apply the skills with whatever resources are on hand. Just keep yours eyes open man. Ignore the asshats and you may have fewer friends, but you will have higher quality friends. Best of luck
Realize it may not be the same but don't discount female friends. Granted, if married, must be aware of the dynamics but some of us ladies enjoy shooting, hunting, etc the same as the guys.
Join the knights of Columbus
@Carissa Cantwell ypu are right about one thing, its definitely not the same.
@@jeremyrobertson3752 I actually just did last Sunday. I am now a third degree Knight
I believe having a “ band of brothers “ is very important not only for SHTF but for everyday life. But like many of the comments, I too have found it very hard to establish a very close friendship with anyone thst I can call a brother.
To those on here like me, it’s not you and not having a “ band of brothers “ is not the end of the world. Learning to take care of issues, deal with problems and cope with everyday life by yourself, is an asset.
I’ve gotten very used to either doing things myself or paying someone to do something. Being self sufficient has actually made me stronger, smarter and more confident.
Let me be clear, I have friends and acquaintances, I’m not a hermit or live under a rock but I don’t consider anyone of them a “ band of brothers “
My band of brothers was my co workers for years. Many couldn't understand why I drove a hour plus to work one way daily.
I got paid to "hang out" with my best friends doing what I literally love to do as a Drywall contractor.
I still have that option and use it. However I don't do it daily anymore and work solo most of the time. It's much more difficult on my own and even more difficult to find that connection where I am now.
“If you don’t say no to your kids, you’re a horrible person” YES!!! Thank you for stating the truths that people don’t want to hear.
I retired in my late 50s and moved out of state. It is very hard to "make friends" . I'm active in some things but these are people I'm friendly with but not friends. I lost my work friends. This created a huge void. Very involved in church but my denomination does not lend itself to socialization. It's an odd place to be in life.
Don't feel like you are alone in this. I am in the same boat. Left the Marines decades ago. Retired, moved back to my home town. Have people I am friendly with, but NO FRIENDS. My BROTHERS from the Corps are few left. My BROTHER is my youngest son.
@mean45acp Prior service too. My son is on active duty year 5. Told him to stay in. Don't think he will adjust well to the sudden loss of all friends.
@@BirdDogey1
It is not an easy adjustment, that is for sure. Please THANK HIM for his service from my and my family.
Another great video - and I whole-heartedly agree with your perspective on this.
Over the course of my life, my best and closest friends have come into my life through CrossFit and martial arts. Any activity that pushes you to be better tomorrow than you are today, helps you become comfortable being uncomfortable, and introduces you to healthy, industrious, like-minded folks, is worth undertaking.
“Steel sharpens steel.”
I’m not a church-goer, but I grew up in a Christian home, and have always appreciated the strong emphasis on family and community invariably found in Christian congregations.
Keep up the excellent work, Warrior-Poets. Your message is both important and timely.
Cheers! 🍻
I need a tribe BAD!! In WA STATE. God, Guns, Training, play with my Night Vision! Let me know
Thank you guys for the admonition. Making choices to reinforce positive relationships should be straight forward, but it’s easy to push it aside.
Wait. I ain't part of your Tribe? That ain't cool, bro.
Yeah, what's up with that?
Of course we’ve got the macro tribe here you’re a part of! But dude, you’ve got to have a local tribe!
If grid goes down you’re stuck with those that are literally closest to you. Unfortunately our fellow Americans may not all be warrior poets. I’ll pray for you and for myself we find that. I’m in you boat brother. Forever. I’m just not with you and I’m sorry it’s that way
John and Guys. Excellent video, covers soo much great stuff! Our young generation needs to adhere to your points. Myself, I have been guilty of some of your points
I have grown to be come a better person. Thanks so much for what you do at Warrior Poet. God Bless!
Trust no one
BEST DAMN COMMENT I WILL READ, 100%. THE ONLY PERSON WHO REALLY CARES ABOUT YOU, " IS YOU ".
I do not, and it has been discouraging trying to build my tribe. Excited to listen and apply the ideas here.
5 of my best friends live within 4 miles. In the country, no main roads to get to the others. Rangers and shooting guns and it’s very badass
It's great to hear that I am not the only one who has struggled with wanting to be by myself since I got out. Thanks for being so honest. I need to get into a good church to find more people like me.
Like others here, my church security team is my band of brothers & my tribe. We are intimately close in a toxically masculine sort of way. But we became this close knit group organically, it was not programmed or structured. Our tribe has been noticed by our church, and there have been efforts to duplicate our fellowship in an intentional structured way, but those efforts fizzled out. I believe the Holy Spirit bonded us into the great team that we have become. We also attempt to include younger men in our security ministry and mentor them to be Godly men. Iron sharpens iron. Love your channel.
This is the best episode John has ever done. It is really hard finding a tribe after getting out. The guy down below that said we should have local WPS meet ups is spot on. I always nod to the fellas I see wearing the t-shirt or hat.
Another excellent video. Enjoying WPSN with the full videos!
Love my church, but challenging to find my band of brothers. I thought I did but the pandemic exposed extreme fear and that armor of God had suddenly disappeared. I took my armor, (reluctantly) and moved on. Still loving my God and attending Church. Thanks John. God bless you and the Family, and the WPS Crew.
John, I served in a local service club doing projects in the community. That introduced me to really quality people for 8 years.. Mine was time with a lions club, but there are other service clubs.
You are the first I've heard mention warm weather folks no working as hard in contrast with the north. Yes, it was so frustrating to call a business to get anything done! 2 weeks later ya get a call back for an appointment.
Thanks John, I agree 100% and thanks for reminding me to make this a priority. I have some people in mind but need to make the effort to initiate setting up something together to strengthen that bond like getting the families together, getting involved in the church, or setting a day to hit the range together.
Definitely good to have a group of people you can rely on but I think it's also important to expose yourself to new people outside of your tribe to get new perspectives and avoid tunnel vision in life
I saw your tribute Yeager on a different channel. I used to like you a lot. Now I must say, I love you brother.
That was awesome. All of you are in my prayers now. It was good to find this message to put GOD first and continue to be strong. GOD Bless!
The “typical male routine” but definitely hit the nail on the head. Also, the description of the friend that should be part of your tribe motivates me to to reconnect with a buddy that I haven’t heard from in a few years. He’s the guy that would tell me the hard truth and punch me in the nose to keep me from screwing up.
Excited for this episode. As almost 30 y/o, and working from home now, the routine of gym and otherwise being home with the family doesn't lend much to connecting with brothers.
I am also of the opinion that rural people, as I am one, by default are more standoffish and skeptical of connecting with others. They/we are often self sufficient to some degree and untrusting of others who may compromise that. But, if you can connect over shared interests, you wont find a better group. Excited to hear your take, and find my group too!