right person/wrong time
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- Опубліковано 10 тра 2024
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@housecat0
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You can love someone with your whole heart, and they can still not be the person for you. That's one of the toughest and hardest lessons I've had to learn.
Who asked?
@@nihilist6008 i asked
@@nihilist6008me
@@nihilist6008grow up
@@nihilist6008name checks out, bet you the type who thinks Nietzsche was really about yalls weak ahh philosophy, put some optimism into that.
The timing of this is LITERALLY a personal attack. Well played.
Haha, same
+1
litch
Broke up 3 days ago. Right on time id say
Literally
I don't think I could go through this five more times
Not even 3😭
dude i cant even do this now wtf do you mean 5 more times
It gets easier each time, because you learn that feeling your feelings isn't dangerous and it gets them over with faster.
But you definitely will. 5 isn't an exact number. But time will most certainly heal you if you allow it to and trust me when I say this from experience, you will find another person you can love with the same intensity. It does feel impossible right after you had this experience, but it does indeed happen again.
that indeed sounds hopeful and wonderful. i just got out of my first relationship heartbroken, believing that I won't have such love ever again. but your message gives me hope.@@gauravbhalerao7420
“Under the circumstances you did your best, and I’m proud of you” thanks now I’m crying
I didn't watch the video until the end, but when I saw this comment, I decided to watch it just to hear that quote with my own ears. That's how sorry I am...
Everyone says it, but it really is interesting how perfect his timing is.
No for real. It’s crazy 😢
Yeah holy shit.
he delves into universal human issues and has an enourmous viewer base. of course it will be relatable to some. may even fully coincide with others. whats crazy or interesting about that.
every single time
Are you sure that that is not confirmation bias, on your behalf?
Whoever is reading this, do not share this video with them. They won't suddenly change their mind, it is better like this. Stop hurting yourself, please. Give it some time, there are better days ahead now that you've gotten to know yourself better.
Also please remind me that I said this, cause I'm gonna need to read it a couple times this month
Reminder
@@kirbylover37 I just added her number back into my phone with the name 1 september (by then I'll probably hit unblock), things might've not worked out the way they could. But she has enough of my stuff to never forget me, and it's a shame to lose a friend like that.
I'll be back here in a month from now like "I should've known", but there's no fun in giving up already
I haven't even had the courage to delete her number in the first place. But I haven't begged her to reconsider (yet), so there's that...I'm still fantasizing about her thinking about me, and one day deciding to text me...
@@Aendolin There are so many girls out there my friend. Find one that wants to be with you.
@@kirbylover37next step :)
If I had the chance to go back and do it all again knowing this was how it was going to end.
I would do it in a heartbeat, just for the chance to be with you again.
Oh I wouldn't
There are less painful and time-consuming ways to learn the lessons I did
But hey, dwelling in "if-I-could-I-would's" is about as useless as waiting on time to go backwards
@@matheussanthiago9685 if that’s what you’re like, that’s fine. I for one choose to remain a hopeless romantic
this made me bawl
There's a couple of old songs with lyrics like that.
Total bullshit. Keep the trash were it belongs
Damn, the timing. 5 year relationship ended a month ish ago, thought we’d be forever, we were perfect for each other. Every day we laughed more, so much so our neighbours wondered how. We always thought it sad that others did have that in their relationships. But that’s all gone now. My friends and family have said I’ve come a long way in such a short space of time. Instead of standing still, I dove head first into reflection, introspection and therapy. Unpicking and healthily processing and externalising every thought. It’s helped a huge amount, and has given me a clear mind in handling it all and made sure I learned from any mistakes whilst it was all fresh, otherwise it’s disrespectful to what once was. But the pain is something I can’t rid myself of, it’s just there. Pays a visit randomly for a day. Resets me to zero. And then I start again with renewed vigour and appreciation, gratitude for what was and what still can be. I hate it and wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I can only hope I find that love, vulnerability, goofiness and happiness again with someone. It’s a lot to hope.
Love you bro
Same here. You’re not alone bro
Same here, 5.5yrs.. Yesterday would have been 6 years together. She's a good girl, she treated me extremely well. We just aren't in control of life as much as we'd like to think we are. These painful situations happen because they are catalysts for our self growth
Let those tears out. You always feel better after rinsing out that pressure
Same man. I feel exactly the same as you, like we went through the same thing. Except you seem so much stronger, coping in healthy ways. I've tried to work on myself but keep having unhealthy attachemnts and desperation. Falling back to zero again and agian.
I think the crushing feeling of inadequacy hurts the most when someone slowly pulls away then eventually cuts you off when they feel good enough to do it. You didn’t get the chance to pre adjust while they did. It’s hard, but the feeling of getting over them and moving on is really lifting. Might take months and years but eventually everything is ok :)
You have no idea how strong your words have moved me, thank you kind stranger :)
thank you
There’s always at least one person who isn’t upset about the breakup. Glad that it happened, even.
absolutely this. the shock of them having moved on while you haven't is a terrible feeling.
@@d33p345 for real :(
"Meeting the wrong person at the right time means that you are ripe for real relationship, but you are mistaking the identity of the person to whom you are attracted. This can lead you astray and cost you a great deal in terms of time and energy."
_Relationships and Higher Purpose_ by MV Summers.
This happened to me and I would have preferred meeting the right person at the wrong time.
Actually when I think about it - it wasn’t the right time either. It would have been the perfect time in my life to explore the world and myself and I spent it shoving hope into a black hole. It’s not too late though. As long as I live I can learn from mistakes and keep exploring. I just hope it’s true that we learn best from making mistakes.
@@NothingButThought thank you for this comment
I feel this deeply and it's exactly what ended up happening. I think admitting finally that they were not the right person it was just the right time has been a big step for me.
Nah, everyone is the wrong person. The real unification is in yourself. Then you won't look outwards to others for it.
@@guitarszeni feel like this approach has hurt me so much. we are social beings by nature, it's not wrong to crave or want a romantic connection, what's wrong is thinking that will erase all your problems and detach yourself from your own identity and self worth. those are two really different sentiments
This hit me like a brick. Two years with the only person that has loved me for who I was and the last week without them felt like I was dead.
hows it holdin up?
Hope you’re well
@@smcheeto much better, though i made some mistakes recently, it gets better
@@mirok509 nice man, keep it up
Going through this now. 2.5 years. I'll miss him forever. It feels like a part of me has died. I was so happy for the first time in my entire life. 😞
When this video came out I was freshly heartbroken. It was my first relationship. it wasn't very long but it felt extremely meaningful and I was very attached. The breakup came at a great surprise. This video felt extremely personal, but it really felt like I was never going to get better.
Its been 4 months and I just had my "thursday morning 6 months from now" moment. To anyone else that's grieving the loss of a relationship, I say let yourself feel this grief, express it, but do so with knowledge that in the end you will survive, you will grow, and you will love again
Amazing words, thank you
Wow, the timing matches with mine. I’m glad to know I’m not alone out there. Thank you, I hope that everything in your life is going well too
@@derpyderp7444 you're not alone man. i'm going through this as we speak, alongside the feelings mentioned in the video. literally everything is spot on. i left her for her. staying would have been for myself...
@@ryxen525 I appreciate hearing that. I hope that you know you're not alone as well. Life likes to kick you down sometimes, but the way I see it, if you keep fighting, you'll come out of this better and stronger. Keep going, we're all cheering for you man.
same bro, thanks for sharing, really gives hope.
as someone at the end "acceptance" phase, I've started to cry a lot more, not out of desire or due to the ache that will always be there, but out of the contentment of having experienced them in the first place.
God I yearn for this, I fucked up so bad, I just want to forgive myself and be able to get to that stage too ... ugh curse my narcissism and BLESS you and I'm so glad for you friend
real
@@authaireme too honey we'll get there one day i hope, just gotta serve as most good as we can to the world from this point on
Stop I’m crying
I'm scared of reaching that point. A point where the same things that hurt now will fill me with satisfaction.
“This exact situation will happen to you five more times before you die,” is one of the most dreadful and beautiful concepts I have ever heard. Thank you. 🖤
Why is it beautiful? I don't understand why he said it five times.
@@freakyholicI googled it, it seems that's just what the statistics are for average number of relationships in some studies
I’m 27, and I’ve had three. It’s so crazy how accurate that ending is. It’s sooooooooooo scary. You will love 5 people in your life the way you love yourself. And then experience true love heart break.
@@Killjoy210 Well there's more to it! Love is not easy if you don't stand your ground in your roots. Think of the life of a tree. Is tree living? Is it capable of love? Of course! It gives it shade no matter what or who you are. So step away from attachment and be like tree. Loving and standing in your own roots! No heartbreak there
@@Killjoy210 Hahaha, "love myself." Good one!
"6 months from now you will wake up, and you will realize, it's been a full day since you've thought of them" damn man..
What I found pretty hard, before the acceptance, is to let go of the melancholia and nostalgic memories of them, as it’s probably the last powerful emotion and connection I’ll feel towards them. Letting go of the melancholia felt like letting go of the relationship, though it has been such a happy one, and I still struggle to let go. Take care out there, and call your friends.
one thing that helped me (and may help you) is to create new memories to fill the void those nostalgic memories will leave once we let go of them
i was lucky to know some people that adopted me to their friend group even though i dont fit in quite well. pushed myself out of the comfort zone and tried to create memories of things i wouldnt normally do.
i would still think of my past occasionally, but its become easier for me to steer my mind away from it and think of the new things im trying to experiencr
@@sevenover42 I agree. Since I posted this, I also slowly realized that it didn't make sense to stop myself from living to not forget them. And that I have much more to experience. It takes courage, and time, to get out of your comfort zone as you did. I'm getting there steadily. Keep it up, and thanks for taking the time.
@@sylvainb.8870 best wishes to your journey forward. we can make it through
what happens if I’m already done with the melancholy, but I’m still too scared to end things? i don’t want to crush her
i think they're talking about the melancholy you feel after you break up. you can break up with someone as gentle as you can. she will probably be crushed but you can only control what you say and do.@@wren_.
"Meeting the right person at the wrong time means that you recognize someone, but you do not have the capacity to participate with him or her. This will be a very difficult experience."
_Relationships and Higher Purpose_ by MV Summers.
I think it can still work and not end in a breakup. It's very difficult as it takes insight to notice what's going on and hard work to grow
Thank you.
It doesn't always have to necessarily be that. Circumstances count, culture counts, family counts, race counts, backgrounds count. And many more...
No the person (guy)got handsome. Stop w the pixar cuck muhh love cesspool
Do you recommend reading this book? How was it? Did it help you cope in any way?
"You opened yourself up entirely and things did not work out the way you expected them to. I'm sorry that this has happened" hit me hard and made me cry, but it felt like a good cry because I haven't felt seen or heard like this in a while (which is actually sad and probably the other reason why it made me so sad to hear these words coming from a strange person in a UA-cam video instead of a friend)
I hope that reminds you that we are going through this together.
This comment made me decide I don't want to watch this video lmao. I could barely handle this comment 🤣 I gotta leave
@@meowJACK oh noo I'm sorry, I didn't want to scare anyone off! And maybe sometimes it's important to feel those heavy feelings and let them out. But I understand if you don't want to feel this right now 🖤
Had to wipe a small tear from the corners of my eyes too
Today is that day for me, she was exactly that person, everything started off end ended just like you described. Rather than bargaining and begging her to take me back, I put everything aside, thanked her for all the good memories and told she will be in my good graces forever.
Told her I probably won’t ever be reaching out to her because it will just hurt me and deepen my pain. At least for the time being. Hugged and kissed her for one last time, left her place. Cried my eyes out during the drive home, literally still sobbing.
I appreciate every moment good and bad that I had the opportunity to experience with you, D. Thank you.
This video, it is a masterpiece manifesting the reality that human beings live through same harsh realities. Felt it in my core, thank you too, Sisyphus.
Same man, happened just yesterday to me. 4 years, but I’m the one who has to end it. She’s perfect. She is. But perfect deserves more than the distance between us. I would trade anything to be with her. Cutting off my own limbs would’ve hurt less.
@@sweetannoying3889 fuck I cannot imagine how you feel.
my first 4 years relationship just ended yesterday, I see all the reasons why its clear and right for her to break up with me so that both of us have a better chance at finding someone that we can truly connect with.
Yet I still can't help but selfishly believe she should stay with me, video really hit me with the "And if they care for you, they will recognise your despiration as a sign that distancing really is necessary."
What fucks me up is I didn’t even have them in the first place and it still hurt like hell when they left
I feel you. I feel like my imaginary girlfriend broke up with me and I'm embarrassed at how hard I'm taking it. There was something there but I made it into more than it was. Chin up. We're doing our best.
Glad it’s not just me with this kinda thing. She was my best friend for the past 2 years and we got close to getting together until she started to attack me, lie straight to my face, and just declined in quality as a person. I tried to communicate with her, but she was incapable I guess. We still interact on occasion (she has a partner now while I’m still single), but seems upset with the idea with me being happy with someone else, even going out of her way to be vicious to the current girl I’m interested in. I’m not sure what she wants from me, but I’m fairly certain it’s not in my best interest and I’m ready to move on.
5-6 month situationship, i knew she was married and it would end poorly, yet i still replay all the affirmations and empty promises she said to me.
worst thing ever because you still hold onto hope that one day you’ll be with them. But you just need to wake up and move on (still haven’t gotten to that part yet and its been ten years help what do i do)
@@catminecraftyasbrother she texted me the other day that shes moving back home in another state, asked to see me again, but I just wished her the best and to take care of herself. I cried last night if im bein honest. Ill miss her, she is a beautiful person
The "This is happening to you 5 more times before you die" really destroyed me in a good way. Here in Brazil a long term love is so much hard to find and last week my girlfriend broke up with me I really needed this video to be posted, thanks.
why find a long term love is hard in Brazil?
On the same boat, lol. Whatever i regret nothing
Too bad it is wrong. If you have to go more that a couple of times then you will have to realize you are not smart.
@@ojobruma cuz brazil is a country where kiss and relationships doesnt mean a thing, its the pinnacle of bauman's liquid love. here is so easy to kiss someone and then the other day u are kissing another person like nothing even happen before. imo, its a fun stuff :)
The fact that not only Brazil, its the same in Germany too. Long term love has become a joke in many countries now. I am sure more people will watch this video soon as time passes
Love without attachment is one of my main focuses right now. I want to be able to value and appreciate holistically. Even if I lose them, I won’t lose the positive memories I made with them. I won’t regress to the person I was before I met them.
That way you always have a guilt of not giving your all. I would rather be hurt and be sure that I gave my all. Than regret I could have done better
There is no such thing as love without attachment
@@gaunle6542But it's not good and healthy to give your all. If you give your all, then what will be left for you? I think it's important to give yourself first and then you can give the right things correctly and in a healthy way to the person (Sorry for my English I'm not a native speaker 🧍🏻♀️)
that reminds me of the aspect in stoic philosophy that people, ultimately, don't "belong" to us. we don't "lose" people, we return them, and i'm practicing that now too. best of luck to you :)
@@DelFlo Love is knowing that you don’t have to be attached to be connected
My anxiety and overthinking fucked it up. She was right person in right time
if you have anxiety and overthink a lot, it is unfair for your partner to pick up your burden. It was the wrong time, you still needed to grow.
It might be helpful to research relationships there’s a book about overthinking I personally haven’t read yet but your comment reminded me of it. It’ll be okay, slowly, but it’ll be okay.
I understand that. I overthought probably a bit too much as well, and it really hurt me, but for me at least, recently I realized it wasn’t overthinking and that my fears were true.
it might have been the wrong time. if it were the right time, it would have happened. our feast to an untrained chef will look complete; a good chef will know what the missing ingredients are, and is patient enough to know that our meal is not ready yet.
you obviously shouldn't give up hope if you, with good judgement and good heart, believe that they can come back to you, but don't let it weigh you down like that. I'm in the middle of something very similar. we can't stare at our seeds and weep that they haven't bloomed fully as a flower. we also can't put the main focus of our patience around a seed becoming itself. we just have to look at it on the ground and check back in every once in a while, and enjoy our lives. not move on away from them, but make a tiny place in your heart that doesn't take up the rest of the space
Don't forget circunstmace as well
If you screwed up for reasons outside your control, albeit inside your mind
Then the circumstances weren't right
At least now you have a clear path on what to work out in you before the next round
Consider yourself lucky, most people haven't got even that
7 years now she’s a stranger with amazing memories we had , happy she found someone (: I hope nothing but the best for her
2.5 years now, a month has passed and shes recovered. happy for her but i feel like a shell, how do you do it
@@climboutofhell thats beautiful, thank you. i wish you all the same
loving this young frightens me so much. there's always this thought that what we have may not last because there's still a lot of time and a lot of things could still happen. it makes me wish i had met him much later in life, that way, we'd actually end up together.
Me too
Try to enjoy while it lasts, worrying too much about what will happen takes the joy away:)
I used to feel that about my ex. We were too young, things were too good, and we had all of our mistakes ahead of us. I was right.
You are admitting that you are unstable and can be drawn off by others that look like better offers.
Don’t obsess about the future, I know people who are happily married in their late 50s who started dating as freshmen in high school
kinda similar story,
I was cheated on with my longest relationship actually about a year ago today.
Post breakup I went full into self improvement and I fell deep. Completely changed myself and perspectives I once had. It was a beautiful metamorphosis. I was at my peak happiest self in terms of confidence and overall lifestyle around February. When I went to the gym I’d see this girl, something about her sparked my brain. Fast forward, I get to know her and we get really close. It was just, the puzzle piece we both needed. We went on crazy adventures, Yosemite and beach trips in San Diego. The sad part is she was moving for college, We ran the course of our connection to the fullest extent. It was beautiful.
She’s gone now, haven’t heard from her. That is perfectly fine, after some reflection I realized that is the kind of partner I want. I’m headed in the right direction.
Even if it wasn’t her.
“I’m headed in the right direction. Even if it wasn’t her” damn.
Similar story as you, but the moving for work hasn’t happened yet. It’ll come next year or maybe 2-3, and it already breaks my heart knowing what’s to come. I’m starting to believe that right person, wrong time is real because of her
Stop looking. You are who you’ve looking for. I, myself, tend to fill other people’s cups up constantly but treat my own cup irresponsibly. Then I was told “treat yourself like someone you loved”. You are the one who can truly make you happy. You’re already enough. We all see flaws in our reflection, but you’re perfect the way you’ve been made. You are worth it. Love you like someone you loved.
I’m currently going through a breakup, it’s really hard to imagine someone replacing them. But then your channel came up, man :)). I found comfort in your videos, and answers as well. The timing is really perfect. It’s been 3 months already and they found someone new. And i’m really thankful how there are people that feel the same as I do, this really gives me some kind of comfort. I really don’t know how to begin to heal, i’m still hoping for a chance despite them finding a new lover. If i could go back time I would surely correct my mistakes and make it up to them. Again, man, thank you.
For me its been three years in a relationship and it ended 3 days ago. God did I look long for a person like her and god was i sure she is it. Im the kind of erson that can easily spent an hour doing nothing else but thinking, while she was always living in the moment with her full heart. I thought that makes us fit well together, as i was building our future while she kept me in the here and now. Turns out she saw that differently and now I'm allone at the final stretch of achieving a dream that was never meant to be for just me...
Anyways i think u spent long enough hoping. Them moving on to the next person should be the last mercy to your suffering. Whatever you were doing in the past, it is done now and there is no reason anymore to suffer from hope or regret. It is time for you to close that chapter of your life, take whatever u've learned from your relationship and focus it into something new. Whatever it will be.
@@victorportable3892bro how can we all have the same situation 😂,its the same to every Little detail
Scarily, same exact thing for me. Chick already moved on to someone else in 3 months, lmao.
I just got out of a relationship and they were an amazing partner who has supported me through my lowest, it just hurts so much knowing I may have lost a great person. To whoever reading this and going through the same, it’s normal to be hurt and have feelings, be kind to yourself, they were special and it will hurt for a bit of time. But love yourself, it’s time to figure out who you are again, what you want and take time❤
thank you🥺
I appreciate your message, it doesn’t feel normal to be hurt. Shi can change you as cringy as it sounds❤️
I hear you man, absolutely awful
It's been 4 years of pain. Even more knowing she's with somebody else repeating a love story I thought was a "special thing" for both of us.
Why did it end?
I relate to this immensely. There was once a time where I had this person who I would do anything for, sacrifice my time and attention for whenever she's presented. When we got closer, she told me that she felt safe to be around me, as if I was someone who she trusted dearly. I felt moved by her words. All those times I spent with her gave me the motivation to go to school everyday, to wake up early everyday and to stay up late everyday in hopes that we may talk again.
One day however, I decided to confess my feelings towards them. It was a day where the sky was blue and clear, the weather wasn't all hot, nor too cold. It felt great, it felt like a good day, but she rejected me. Her words felt like a knife at first, but then a bandage for the wound that it done. I understand the things she'd said as the response to my confession, and we remained as friends till now.
We don't talk much as before, frankly she probably doesn't feel safe to interact with me, but it was the consequence to my confession.. and I don't hate it. I had only chose to spoke with honesty, and her accepting wasn't what I searched for. Being honest with myself and her was what I yearned, and I'm glad I confessed to her.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story kind stranger, i found it very inspiring and i really like your writing style. You were very brave to confess your feelings and held on to it by accepting honesty, be it in a form of rejection. Although bittersweet, it sounds like a lovely experience. Hope you have a great day/night. Stay awesome.
A friendship dies the moment one person begins to have feelings for the other
Not telling your inner feelings is like not allowing your yet unrealized self be born. You spoke thruthfully and that is never wrong.
Based
Congratulations on having the guts to tell her how you felt, live a life to its fullest and there's no regrets❤
Being able to watch this video and smile at moments that once felt like dying. It really is wonderful how powerful the human spirit is 🥀
you didnt have to kill me with that last line 😂
It is kind of comforting to know that this is such a universal situation to be experienced by so many people... On the other hand it makes finding real, lasting love, feel so unachievable.
This video perfectly describes my situation right now down to the absolute details... Its already helping me get through all of this way easier, thank you so much! ❤
PS: thanks for the "happy end" of this video 😂
I really did laugh at the ending, even though I’m just 3 weeks post the end of a 3 year relationship
I take it to mean that it’ll happen a couple times until it finally manages to be the right person for the right time
Currently going through a rough patch in my relationship with someone who subjectively has been the best person i’ve been with, yet our situation is somewhere where i don’t know if we will end up doing this long term. I’ve never been afraid to be alone, but this one is concerning because i thought we had potential and now i have thoughts it might be better if we look for something else. This video hits hard. Not exactly like my situation but i can relate somewhat.
edit: typo
Love for you my friend. I know this feeling of uncertainty and it can be rough. But if its meant to be then it will last and if its not, then it will be for the better.
Every break up is a chance to get to know yourself better, and find out new things about you and the world. And eventually the right person will come one day. Keep ur head up
A year of pain for a life time of happiness and love
Nvm thats not healthy, a year of pain? Sorry
You're not alone. Im going through something very similar. We had to go our seperate ways for right now. I've never really had a problem being on my own either but this time was different. I really wanted to be with this person and fight for them but, Ive created a lot of trust issues (no cheating or anything but in other ways). She says she deserves better but we both still love each other very much. Not sure weather to let go or stay... this is the most difficult part.
this is exactly where i am
this video is disgustingly accurate…
This year on valentines day it became clear that we wont be together and since then I‘ve had a lot of time to sit back and reflect on my behaviour. This whole thing started almost a year ago in April and before that I‘ve went through similar experiences with other people. This time, I thought, would be different, this time, I thought, it would work out. Well it didnt. And it hurts a lot. Like a lot. Ive been in a pretty depressed state since and trying to change my view on romance and relationships. Who knows maybe I‘ll manage to grow as a person and hopefully not repeat the cycle in the future.
Thank you for this video, it really touched my soul.
so real. I keep repeating the same cycle when I thought I changed. It hurts to keep hurting people, but hopefully, I heal my own personal problems before jumping into another relationship
@@saysayaa this is the way. It will get better. At least thats what I‘m telling myself everyday.
@@avnoir. just gotta stay positive bro, your mindset is everything
"Disgustingly accurate" is spot on, LOL. The video legit scared me from how precise it is for me right now, and I had no idea what the actual theme was. Almost as if I made the video to myself.
Good thing is, nothing can get me to avoid something like telling me "it will happen to you"
Sisyphus clutching up once again
😂😂
Wow. Involuntary tears started coming on when you said “Im proud of you”. Im in the midst of exactly this, and I just wish the person, one time, would have said “I see youre trying and it means a lot.” Never an honest word of support. Hurts so much.
It's funny I teard up there too, I mean the cadence of his voice just has that impact but also I think there's something to being told someone is proud of you that brings on a certain kind of feeling, idk I never got that a lot from my parents growing up so the few times I heard it authentically stick out in memory, and so him saying it with the delivery of the perfect fatherly figure in that moment haha, it lights up all those same neurons or something.
give yourself the support you are looking for.
anything else is just another reason why you think you both should be in contact while truly you are not.
you have yourself to be in contact with, all those beautiful and real feelings, resonances, ideas, moves, all the richness and the silence behind it that is you. Don't wait for anything while being your pure simple magical breathing self.
Thank you for these magical and inspiring words friend@@TaliaMellifera
I see you are trying and it means a lot ❤
Same. My life for the past few months has been this video. To see so many people relate and find a community of people that experienced the same under this video feels...nice. After the longest time something feels... nice.
"The important thing is that you tried, you were on this earth to connect under the circumstances you did your best" yuppp that hits beyond different
So many video essayists on this platform and you're the only video poet.
This was crafted beautifully and with so much honesty.
This is the Anxious-Avoidant trap, and it can be avoided by forming a more secure attachment style.
How do u do that?
The video doesn't exist discuss attachment style.
Thanks for sharing this term with us. Explains the issues in my last relationship
the way you speak and emphasize every word with so much meaning is beautiful. your videos have done so much for me, thank you.
I'm so sorry this happened to you but I can't take you seriously from your profile picture
@@Pocd953 the most random ass reply i've ever seen in this channel and yet so true
@@Pocd953 LMAOOO no you’re right i completely forgot that was my picture
Funny, the whole scenario smacks of immaturity, lack of insight or understanding of psychology. It's what can happen to you when you are not experienced or wise enough.
@@guitarszenyour behaviour is intolerable. please refrain from the HOARD of hate comments, they aren't needed nor appreciated. this is a safe space for people to open up and your bitterness is not accepted here. please leave swiftly and silently
"This exact situation will happen to you 5 more times until you die" 😭😭😭
The time this notified me I didn't watched it immediately because the timing was brutal and knowing this guy; I would cry pool of tears and watching it now is so weird its so accurate.
me and the "right person" are slowly coming back together now ^^ fixing our flaws and forgiving each other
I believe in right person wrong time, but if its really the right person, right time will come for them.
Hi, can I ask what break you two up and how much time apart if took for y’all to come tg again?
@@valeriapazmino338bro let it go
@@valeriapazmino338Also asking. Lol.
There was this girl who I dated for almost 3 years, it all was bliss till it wasn't. It's been almost an entire year and in that year I was the most miserable slob I was. Till she reached out and we tried to talk, she had already moved on and found someone new, and stupidly I didn't. I would never tell her but I wish I still had a chance with her even though that chance slipped away a long long time ago. But soon, as we spoke less and less, the thought of her started to fade, each time someone would mention her name it wouldn't sting as much, all the dreams I've had of growing up with her slowly faded, I was healing. It's been awhile since I've even thought about her but this video brought back good and bad memories. I've moved on, but the memories still linger, but safe to say? I look back at it fondly, and now I don't think I'd change anything.
thank you for sharing; your words give me the hope that i'll eventually find peace with my situation too. ❤
bro didnt have to end it with da "im proud of you" now im crying in my room
I'm glad he did. I'm proud of you, too
That part about moving for one more chance sent my stomach to the floor. My partner and I have been in a tense state ever since we got back together. So much has changed and we only really have each other. I have a feeling we both know it's time, but we're not ready. We have talks almost every month asking if we're really ok with all the changes we've made to continue to be together. I don't want to hurt my boy, but I don't know how long we'd have to stay together to not feel like we're just one stressful week away from calling it.
I'm reading this one month after, how's it going now?
Take a break for a month or more if agreed by both parties.
watching this video every day because it makes me cry. it just hurts so much. but also, i’m so proud of myself. for really truly loving someone, for finally letting myself be vulnerable again, and for being everything that person could want in a partner. i tried so hard, cared so much, and did my absolute best to show someone how much they mean to me. i truly did my best. is a relationship what they need in their life right now? no. am i in pain every day? yes, but after losing my best friend to heroin in 2016, i hadn’t had a single close relationship with another person, platonic or romantic. i have a lot of healing and work to do, but i finally feel worthy of love again, and i finally feel like i actually deserve the work it takes to get better. it’s going to suck, it’s going to hurt, and it’s going to take a long time, but i don’t think i’m fundamentally broken anymore, and i do finally think i deserve to heal. thank you for this video :)
this came at a very convenient and weird time, i think i've just gone through a breakup with the right person. I hope that life throws up back together again one day
I'm going through this exact same process right now. Long-term relationship with someone I felt was my forever. We are both still young, both 24, but it felt like my entire future was taken away from me without having any say in it. It's been over 3 weeks now and I still think about him everyday. It's getting better, and I am learning to find myself once again. Thank you for putting out these videos that speak to so many of us.
Sounds like you’re doing very well for 3 weeks! Give yourself time, I’m on month four almost but I’m starting to see glimpses of light :)
I’m in the same boat. 23, 2 months out and got totally blindsided. Somehow doing ok since this isn’t my first rodeo but damn this hits home! Losing the future you worked towards together is difficult. Stay strong, you’re not in this alone 😅
seems like this is something that’s happening to a lot of us :’-) been 1.5 years since my breakup & i still stumble from time to time but it hurts less. stay strong 🖤
Samesies. I'm 24 as well and it's been 3 painful months so far. This video is word for word everything I've had to experience. I'm moving away, I've had to deal with visa issues and health issues. I'm glad to have found a community of people here who can relate and show me that I'm not alone in my experiences. I wish you and everybody the best of luck. I hope we all find love within ourselves, with another person and never have to deal with this again. You better be wrong Sisyphus 55. It better not be 5 times but just this one.
@@zentek5989I’m on month 6 and I’m just now starting to not think about him as much. I’m at the acceptance stage but it’s been so many times where I thought I truly did move on , but would slip up and feel that hurt again. Made me realize that healing is linear and that wound will always be there, I just had to learn how to cope with it better which makes it easier to deal with as time goes on :)
FIVE MORE TIMES? NO, THANK YOU SIR.
it's a comfort to know that so many others feel this way too. thank you
Love the quiet strumming of Remember Me from Coco. Sets the bittersweet/nostalgic tone well.
Not every interaction is like this. With experience you can find the person again but don’t lose yourself keep each other motivated and progressing! Y’all are supposed to build more not conjoin 😼
It’s been 2 years now since we broke up. Growing up I had a rough childhood and she was the only one who ever loved me for me. She made the first move and ultimately chose me. She loved me and cared for me and I did the same for her. I did everything for her, I moved states, switched careers, and financially provided for her. Anything to make her happy. Our relationship was the healthiest, we weren’t afraid to have open conversations about things that worried / upset us. She was my best friend. in the end I think she realized that I deserved better, the feelings she had for me were dwindling and so she handed me a break up letter before my flight back home. I think she was also having trouble getting over the relationship because she wouldn’t let go of this “maybe in the future” idea where we get back together after we’ve had time to work on ourselves. Then 2 weeks later she changed her mind and decided that we shouldn’t get back together ever. I secretly hope that we do, and I think she does too. It was hard for both of us and 2 years later I still find myself longing for a connection like we had. The love ran so deep it was my very reason for living.
Bro got me with the “you did your best. I’m proud of you”.
This came at a time where I’m not dating anyone or really looking to, and it just really reminded me how happy I can make myself instead of looking for whatever I could get from dating. A time might come that I meet someone who I’d do anything to spend my life with, but if that never happens I think I’ll turn out ok anyway.
that's a good mindset. i wish you luck out there
Literally went through this last weekend. Stay strong boys, we're all gonna make it ❤️
Reading this two months after. I hope you're doing better, king ❤
@@06alejandro02 Life gets better every day. Stay after it my brother 💪😎
This is me not even a full week ago. Just short of 10 years together. Feeling a lot of things to say the least.
just focus on o3 and stop wondering about girls
It’s been one week since this happened to me. Hope your doing well👑
This is incredible. This video talked directly to all the pain I have inside and hurt me, but at the same time it made me feel so understood.
And, I just find out about this video, but the craziest thing is that it came out exactly the day when I broke up with the person I thought I would spend all my life with.
I still feel lost.
Thank you.
i miss him so much. every time we are in class together i can’t help but think of the way he made me feel.
i feel like nobody’s talking about how absolutely gorgeous the editing is for these. the combination of animation, old video, and still photos is genius! kudos to you and your editor
Thank you for your words, I’ve realized and self reflected on the things you said. There is no “right person”, we become the right people to each other as time progresses. Each person houses the opportunity to love endlessly, and the failure of one person should not dictate the beauty of what lies in the hearts of others.
This video came to me at a time where I am in the stage of depression. I thought they were perfect for me but now memories of them feels like is a stab wound in my heart. I have been in this stage for 6 months and have not been able to recover. I feel at constant worry that either I will hurt the next person I date or they will hurt me. I don’t know if I will ever be able to love the same again.
Not every strong connection is meant to be long-term.
This is probably the 4th time this guy managed to sync one of his uploads perfectly with my life. It's kinda weird, but at the same time it's really good to hear about what I'm just starting to go through. Thank you
Things will be better eventually. But things will be better without them and that is the worst part.
Realizing that she wasnt the person i thought she was, realizing that she isnt “the one”, that all of our sweet memories were with a person who no longer remembers them the way i do, realizing my first adult relationship was with someone who doesn’t appreciate me anymore, that is the worst part. I wonder if she wonders about me, the way I wonder about her. It has been about three weeks since the break up, i feel better but every time I watch a sisyphus video I cry, whether its because I still want her after everything or because I am moving on and growing without her.
I can't belive how such a short video can condense all of what I'm feeling right now... thank you for making it. Thank you, it arrived exactly when I needed it.
I have never seen a video that sums up exactly how I feel in a moment. This is that video. This is exactly what I needed to validate what I was feeling and that I wasn’t the only one. Thank you.
It's crazy how well timed this video is for me. I'm currently in denial. Even yesterday I begged and begged like a childish idiot. I searched this channel up just to find a video about loneliness and this one really just fits so perfectly. Every word felt like it was directed at me personally.
You're amazing. Thank you.
So sorry to hear that. No one deserve to
This is a dummy account, but if you want I can help you to set up on some dates. You're doing well in solving the rubik cube.
you are not a childish idiot. i did the same thing recently. you are full of love and unfortunately that love was misdirected. we will heal and find love again, this time hopefully directed inwards. i have been practicing to fall in love with myself everyday.
@@steeyul Me too. Learning to give myself priority and love, right now. Trying to be happy. Trying to work hard to build a better future for myself. Good luck to you and hopefully to me also.
The hardest thing about someone who is not in your life anymore the way they used to, is wanting to keep loving them.
All of this sounds painful, terrible and I have no idea why someone would willingly put themselves through this.
no one puts themselves willingly through this. Sadly this just happens.
I listened to this and cried. It touched me in every single way. thank you so much for making this video. i feel seen and heard, and understood. i really loved more than i knew i could, i gave everything. i hope that i can make it through as a new person, someone who is stronger, and i will be happy to be living on this earth, and to have experienced everything i have.
Sisyphus.
What you create is extremely beautiful.
I write as a hobby sometimes, and once in a while, I feel a sudden envy of your work.
Envy of your iconic artstyle,
envy of your irreverent soft voice,
but above all...
I feel a deep envy of your mind,
of your dazzling words.
.
Enjoy Life, You Deserve It
.
Non-native English Speaker
Admiration and wanting to be so
@@mfgee they said it perfectly
What's your native language? You have a very poetic way of writing
you, my friend, not noob
very important to mention not being a native speaker
In another life, I would have really liked just doing laundry and taxes with you.
I haven’t been in love for years but this is my favourite form of spending time. Just pure torture, nice
My heart can’t take it anymore dude
This hits home. I'm so close to fully accepting, yet it feels so far away. Thanks for that, friend. Means a lot to know that others are human too and will go through this 💗
just a few months ago I had a relationship move very fast out of nowhere. within a month of meeting, we met each others parents, spent hours together doing literally anything, and it was good. then one day I was awoken to being blocked on everything. I kept wondering, what did I do? only a few weeks later she reached out and told me everything she was going through and needed to be alone. it was reassuring to know I wasn’t at fault, but it still hurt. eventually you get over it though, you will find someone who is ready when you are. after awhile you are able to look at that relationship with honesty, and realize that it in fact, wasn’t for you. time heals all things
funny this is this isn’t just for romance but friendship too going through a breakup with friends and i can see all the stages of grief im going through in this video
Its both devastating and comforting how spot on this is.
Sisyphus back with another post that'll make me think,cry and eventually feel calm in ways I can't fully explain
I went through a breakup very similar to what you described (except it started out long-distance and stay long-distance throughout the whole "relationship.") It took me so long to understand that I deserved to be in love without all of the pain attached to what we had. This video has strengthened my resolve to keep moving forward.
This is exactly what I went through. The “it took me so long to understand that I deserved to be in love without all of the pain” hit home hard.
i'm in the same boat and it's agonizing. i'm almost four months out from a long distance relationship/breakup that changed my whole life. i am in this weird limbo state of accepting it and still hoping she comes back to talk one day. our situation isn't typical and it's hard to know what's happening.
the music just adds another level of poetry to this
First few times this video made me emotional, now I just smile a bit.
I’m just thinking about how this story would feel to those who haven’t felt this before, to those who are in the middle of this, and to those who have seen it and are remembering. Each perspective different, each perspective likely to go through the same experience because of human nature’s will to personal achievement and human’s willingness to sacrifice everything for someone else. It’s beautiful.
I think the real realization I had from relationships like this is that love in every form is something to be worked on and to grow, find someone to do the work with together and individually.
Absolutely. I trusted my partner was committed enough to do the work with me. When it came to it, she wasn't. If I'm lucky enough to meet someone I want to commit to, I won't make the same mistake again. Hardest lesson I ever learned.
@@meaniezucchini5216 You have to test them and watch their actions before committing.
The right person at the wrong time is the wrong person.
apparently I skipped all the steps and went headfirst into "dreams related to them which cause intense emotions and confusion after waking up and incoherent thoughts while awake until I slowly succumb to the inevitable"
The most impressive part of the video is how eloquently these thoughts were put, it takes an impressive amount of self refection to achieve this level of clarity and it's something we should all strive for
I don’t know why I saved this, but I’m happy that I did. My boyfriend, my first one and my first love, just broke up with me a couple of days ago, and the main reason was because we were at 2 different points in our lives. While this video didn’t (and obviously can’t) capture all of the nuances in our relationship, this described so well the emotions that I’m going through. In the acceptance portion, when it said that 6 months from now, I will wake up and not think about him for a day, I almost cried. Thank you for such an amazing video. I needed this right now
Every time I watch one of your videos, it feels so personal. Thank you for that!
It’s almost scary how perfectly he captures these feelings in this video. And amazing timing, as always. Thank you.
ur timing is impeccable. i've accepted the fact that she'll never feel the same way again, and am learning to come to peace with it. i just wish i can tell her everything i've learned to let her know i'll be okay, and with that maybe what i've learned will help her out too.
When I was going through it (tho I *am going through it again now) back in 2021, I told my therapist about how it felt like the pain would never end and how it would be impossible to detach from such an important person who had a meaningful impact on my life.
She told me grief right after the loss is like having a palm right up in front of your face. Then, as time goes on it begins to move little by little to the side- you can still see it, it was part of your life, but it slowly takes up less and less of your field of view. And over time you’ll be able to see better and better. Your life grows around the grief you experience.
But also I realized more recently- next step is to add more life ~so~ your grief isn’t the entirety of your experience. Staying isolated from people and places and anything keeps you in the same place. And honestly, life is so exciting, there is so much to see. I want to be here for it all
Thank you for writing this. Truly could not have come across this at a more perfect time
Met her at work, she was going through a really rough spot so I was there for her and we became friends during a tough spot and we dated, I was skeptical but I let myself become vulnerable for her. I always think of her, 2 months was how long it lasted, to this day I still love and care about her.
I'm at a loss for words. This is exactly what happened to me, except I met her from mutual friends. I was there for her, she fell for me, I was skeptical, but eventually gave it a shot. Like you, it only lasted 2 months, but it was lovely and unfortunately she needed to cut me out for her health 4 days ago. Thank you for your comment and I hope things have gotten better
Same here, meet her at work and she was going rough time. Something kick in me, I was worried for her and always thinking if she was alright. One day her parent kick her out when she turn 18 so she had to live with some friends but it was to far from our job so she had to quit. We didn't loose contact and one day things turn south and she call me crying, she was on the street again. I brougth her to my place and she came back working with me. We got together for 6 months, I gave her all the love I had but she felt lost and trap. I didn't see the sign so she brokeup so she can concentrate on herself and me on myself. It been almost 2 mouths and will still live together cause we both have nowhere to go, she want us to stay friends but I don't know if I can, I still love her and it hurt almost everyday.
We aren’t alone man, I’m 17 and met her 5 months ago in Econ class. Something sparked in me about her and that’s when I decided to give it a shot even tho I was in doubt. Things worked out and got together. It only lasted 2 months. It hurts when the other person already got ready to those feelings of breakup pain. While on the other hand (me or you) have to deal with it once it ends. But remember, you tried your best.
Stop being a nice guy looking for vulnerable women to fix, you say if I fix her, she’s mine forever. That comes from a place of low self worth. Find someone who is happy, they won’t suck the soul out of you.
@@TheMrBackgroudyou can’t live with an ex. What if she wants to bring a guy home to sleep with?
I was dating someone who I felt it was like this. The condition of our breakup however, prevented me from going through most of the pain as I zipped right through to acceptance.
My mother had just broken a bone, and needed some serious assistance so I cancelled the dinner plans we had for my birthday, a week in advance, to make it to my mum's surgery and look after her while she stabilized.
One day after I told her about my mum, we broke up.
Initially, I was angry but about 30 minutes later, I realized I could never be with someone who would force me to chose between spending time with them and helping my mum.
She eventually texted again to mend things, and I gently said no.
I wish I could like this video a thousand times. You gave words to some emotions I could feel, but not explain. Thank you
this whole video was made so meticulously and oh so beautifully. thank you for this! chilling timing that this video was recommended to me.
as someone who has recently been on the other half to the right person/wrong time dynamic, it's eye-opening to see this. it also reassures me that breaking things off, finally, was a good choice i made. i cared and still care for them, perhaps a little too much.
you'll never hear this message but i truly, truly hope you find true softness and love again.
“how could they be fading away when they’re right in front of you? when you can still touch their skin, when you can still kiss them?” that hurt. it’s strange how I found this video at the acceptance stage which was exactly 6 months later, as mentioned in the video. our conversations were so comforting and his words always reassured my heart’s feelings towards him. no matter how tired I was, I always found that energy in me to return the color he sparked into my eyes. my smiles never left. we learned so much about each other, sharing every little moment that felt right and cracking jokes to welcome the warm laughter. soon, there was sudden tension that inevitably grew into a barrier. it brought us back to strangers. I got lost in the dullness of my surroundings that I often stared off at in defeat. days felt endless. it was refreshing to figure out that the world from my eyes those days carried the as much potential as before I crossed paths with him. this was the first time I truly felt loved and I cherished every memory like treasure. I hope it’s the last time! haha just kidding love is too complicated to just simply ignore. though, this clears up my perspective on love a bit more and I’m grateful.
What happened, though? What causes the barrier and separation?
@@DwightLivesMatter I don't even know it myself. it hurts more when you love someone so much, and as perfect as things may go, you can never have them.