The Human Mind Reader: The Subtle Signs of ATTRACTION, DISLIKE, and DECEPTION
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- Опубліковано 28 тра 2024
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Annie Sarnblad, known as "The Microexpressions Expert," is a leading authority in the field of nonverbal communication. With extensive expertise in decoding microexpressions, subtle facial cues, and body language, Annie has dedicated her career to helping individuals understand the hidden messages behind human interactions. As a sought-after speaker, trainer, and consultant, she empowers people to enhance their communication skills, build stronger relationships, and navigate social situations with confidence. With a blend of scientific knowledge and practical insights, Annie's work has made a profound impact on individuals and organizations worldwide, unlocking the secrets of human behavior one expression at a time.
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Diary of a Human Lie Detector: Facial Expressions in Love, Lust, and Lies -amzn.to/48I9iXQ
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0:00 Intro
1:09 What are Microexpressions?
12:14 The Microexpressions of Attraction
27:18 Red Flags
33:49 Dating Advice
40:05 How to Catch a Liar
47:12 Why Powerful People are Obsessed with Microexpressions
54:06 Advice for Young People - Розваги
When someone hates you it's usually for one of 3 reasons they see you as a threat, they hate themselves or they want to be you and have your life.
Or you're not nice...your evaluation is inaccurate. People i dislike are not victims of envy or self hate. They were nasty to me.
Yeah some people just wants you to be miserable with them.. like why? Go be miserable by yourself don’t take everyone with you 😂😅
@cillaggg also when the miserable people see happy people, they don’t like that shit either..they wanna suck the living shit out 😢of your energy… 😂😂
@CJ-ov1pl people who hate themselves or are envious of others are expressing those feelings by being nasty to others, especially to those who (in their opinion) won't fight back.
#2 and #3 are two sides of the same coin.
"Lack of empathy facilitates the rise to power".
I have CPTSD from childhood trauma and I have been reading micro expressions since I was a child. That’s how hyper-vigilance is born. I paid close attention to all expressions so I would know when they were going to erupt.
Ditto. I know things by reading everyone and everything around me. Listen to yourself. You have been trained w out knowing. Anytime I was talked into ignoring this it was a horrific mistake.
Yes! I’m out of there in about 0.5 seconds and I’m not even sure what I’m seeing- but I know it well and I still feel that fear/trauma response.
Same.
Me too!
😮😢 everyone is different
Hatred is too strong. Most people are lazy and create an idea of who other people are, rather than actually getting to know them. Trust your gut, protect urself, surround urself with a people who have demonstrated "showing up" as much as taking.
Growing up w a mom who’s moods were allll over the place constantly, I had to develop the ability to read the tiniest of expressions/body language/vocal tonality etc . That constant walking on eggshells trying to figure out their moods at such a young age really does hone these kind of skills. But in a way, ignorance really can be bliss bc when you’re really good at this you “read” a lot about people you wish you hadn’t seen 🤷🏻♀️
one of the hardest things for people/women with autism can be recognizing facial expressions. now I need to recognize facial microexpressions?!
People express their true intentions in other ways also. A saying I always liked is "when people tell you who they are, believe them." and "watch what people do, not what they say they do." This has worked really well for me. If someone makes a joke about being a jerk or being jealous, watch their behavior, they often actually are.
When truth is important to you, understanding and reading microexpressions is a wonderful thing.
Love this representation of someone wanting to know how to understand people between someone wanting to have the upper hand
Thank you Annie for speaking about being a people pleaser and bending yourself into a pretzel to achieve satisfying others.
There is nothing worse than being constantly gaslighted as a kid and worse of all from ppl who are delusional and simply invent their preferred version of truth
This womans vitality is off the charts. I just want to spend time around her so some of that energy rubs off.
Siphon.
MentalArchitecture, you sound like a Taurus.
I married the first man who flat out told me he liked me. It was refreshing and confident and what I was hoping for!
you like someone once you get to know them , have a history with them, and they are there for you, they don't have to be perfect
When i learned to read everyone , their expressions and verbal manipulations it meant i had to lie all the time so that i didnt make people feel awkward.I can sense a persons anxiety the same way a horse or animal can sense your motive
Yeah it can sometimes make conversation exhausting. Its nice to recognize someone who is struggling and help ingratiate them with the group, but it can also start to feel like babysitting if it becomes too much.
I agree with her mom advice!!….Be 100% 💯 Your authentic self!!….You sir won’t have any problems finding your person….She is out there….Women don’t want that bad boy… They are searching for
Strong masculine energy…A true Gentleman…With confidence, not arrogance..A protective guy that makes them feel safe…..Where you are each other’s best friends!! You are good though….Just be yourself!!
This is such a hard thing for men to grasp, because boys are generally raised in a way that leads them to believe they can only be valuable if they are producing or doing something. Men don’t have the self esteem to see themselves as inherently valuable, simply because they exist. And even if they were raised by mothers who saw them that way, society has a very good way of disabusing them from that sense of inherent value. Try talking to a man about your emotions and not have him try to fix you. Simply listening and validating is impossible for most men because in order to validate others, you must feel valuable.
So, be yourself IF you are a strong masculine guy you mean, but otherwise don't be yourself?
I’m Swedish and moved there for two years when I was 11/12. Swedish is an easy language as virtually everything is spelled how it sounds and vice versa. No silent letters. Yes Swedish is one of the easiest languages I think. I learned it quickly despite all my friends speaking very good English as most Swedes do.
I’m so glad!! I saw this video. Fascinating and so totally useful in every way. Really great what you’ve done and accomplished with this extensive knowledge on micro expressions. This is the most intriguing piece I’ve come across in many
Moons. Thank you
I can read them well but also have a very expressive face myself. This has caused me to be an introvert because I assume people can read my every thought and feeling about them like I can. I also can read differences in people's expressions and be able to tell, because who is around them at the time, others who influence them and those peoples' opinions of me as well.
This conversation is very fluid and I enjoyed it a lot. I also learned about people’s face movements to watch out for. Thank you.
😂 speaking of flirting....it's just not something I do, but sometimes when I am friendly, the guy thinks I'm flirting and asks me out, that shocks me each time!
I have sensed several bad situations, but it was of no help because unable to act on my senstions, lacking knowledge what it was and that I should trust my feelings.
The red flag part you said is 100% accurate!!! My ex husband got me during this point and it was the most miserable time of my life. He was a textbook narcissist. He would ask me questions, I'd answer, then he'd say "omg me too!" My brother caught on but I didn't know what a narcissist was so I disregarded him and I found out the hard way.
Apparently everyone is called a narc these days.
True but 1-6 people are narcs
And it takes much more than that to be classified as a narcissist. You have to actually show a number of traits regularly for a certain period of time. Just like bipolar. 🤦🏻♀️ Bipolar has a min time of 3 months of certain symptoms consistently before it’s even considered.
@@503ashkatchem4 lol no.
@@SKJ1616 I would hate to assume that you're assuming on what I'm talking about. If I could jot down the list of things he's done that matches exactly what a narcissist is... but then again, I have nothing to prove to you.
Excellent talk. I like her. I too can read every nuance. I had to since I was a baby... my parents fought all the time, my mother I now know has BPD... and her emotions were on a wave of despair. No one wanted to trigger her. I grew up with a refined skill to spot deception with ease, and also hidden nonverbals.
Some of us have been doing our entire lives due to childhood trauma. It's a blessing and a curse.
I wonder what micro expressions my ex saw on my face. I used to catch him staring at me like he was examining me. Creepy.
Dr. Paul Eckman and Dr. John Gottman will be able to help you with that answer. David spent decades researching that vary subject
Maybe he stared at you because he loved you. Men, in particular, do not typically stare at women in anger or disgust the way women do. When a man stares at a woman, it’s usually because he adores her.
@@katieandnick4113not unless he has a cluster B personality disorder
Interesting. This comment has made me realise why there are 2 people I don't want to be around. They observe me, but that is in addition to comments which are, let's say, while generally not openly hostile, also not neutral. Rather there is a negative tilt . The comment has just made me realise why I don't like them looking at me!
ua-cam.com/video/FnptjzprQjA/v-deo.html
What a terrific presentation here! So many things went through my mind as I listened and watched. And remembered and revised and re- learned. I'm a Pdychotherapist and Relationship Counsellor. One of my " things" is how judgemental we human beings are and how we
expect , maybe even demand of ourselves and others thst we SHOULD be PERFECT. Men and women, in all sorts of ways. And then, watch out when we're not!
And I loved hearing another human being admit that we're all NEEDY. I've been saying and teaching this for years . Things like " Love your need and your need will love you back". And that so much of what we call our "issues" or "problems"
develop and show up primarily because we deny or cover up what we truly NEED. So thank you big time for this presentation here. Now I don't feel quite so alone. Someone else besides myself sees and knows the truth about human beings being NEEDY! And doesn't see it as a defective or an imperfection or that you're an unhealed person. YAY!
When someone hates you the worst thing we can do is only mirror it back to them. Why then is there such thing as victim blaming when that victim had no idea of what was going to be coming next after ending up under someone's thumb. I agree that being able to recognize microepressions while they are happening is so very important. The only problem with admitting or assuming that anyone has lost that ability to read microexpressions is that it will be stigmatizing all those who are recovering from trauma or who are ever experiencing vision problems. At the same time I am grateful to have that pointed out. Seems to me that children while regarding all of their caregivers as being god like of course they will be maybe experiencing learned helplessness around them too. Some children who have one reliable care giver in their lives learn to switch from one mode of recieving communication to another in order to survive. All it takes is only one person pointing out that someone recovering from trauma has been doing that for a long time including when watching a movie during which time any violence took place on the screen while getting what the movie is portraying. Some movies about a near tragedy are for sure worth watching one more time.
Well done to Annie...thriving even out of her comfort zone 🙌🏼
So good she mentioned Paul Akman …
Men need to realize that in not being open and vulnerable with someone you like, you make the woman take on all the emotional work, and it leaves her wondering. Its really not fair because then frustrations arise just because he can't be open.
im open n vulnerable, just chases ladies away 😂
@@vyassathya you can't be over sharing or desperate. It's about not denying your interest but keeping your integrity. Also just because you're open doesn't mean the other person's going to like you, it just means if you really like someone go for it, because holding back isnt going to help the person/situation if they like you back.
Goes to show, women overthink everything. They do not want an emotional man, the opposite is a stoic man who does not show his emotions. You get what you pick. Because you pick men who hide their emotions you are literally creating the men you are complaining about, lol. Clueless.
It leaves her drained and a healthy woman leaves. An insecure and traumatized woman stays and thinks she can heal and improve you… pull out your potential… all why depleting herself and destroying her soul.
@@vyassathyathe. They are the wrong woman. Keep being you and eventually the right one will arrive. Unless you are super clingy and needy… that’s unhealthy. But we need more emotionally strong and secure men.
He brings the mom out in me. He is really adorable.
Fantastic podcast! I really enjoyed listening to you both and also learnt so much from the content. Thank you so much!
This woman is my spirit human. ❤❤❤❤❤
I think so much of this is instinct. You don't want to read it like its a math assignment. Because if a person feels attracive in your company and likes attention, they may not be into you in an authentic way, but for personal gain or flattery. It has to be paired with all the other cues.
Instinct for women not for men. Men and women grow up in different worlds. Women are emotional and need constant validation from their peers and society. This is why they instantly look for those little micro cues. Men are raised to be self sufficient and not to need social interaction. We aren’t going to get social interaction and we know it so why bother to learn the “hints” other people throw at us. For a man there is no instinct when it comes to dealing with modern women.
Love brings pain so true but so worth it.
even if u show up fake, people wont like that version either - but u never keep that score because its not really u. most people arent right for us.
i don't know what "fake" means however I have been accused of it😂
@@masteringfibromyalgia what I mean by is only you on the inside know if you're putting on a mask or front, and some people might do it more unconsciously than others. Or trying to be what someone else wants you to be but in the end anybody can like or dislike your real self or fake self so you might as well be real
@@masteringfibromyalgiais that really true though?
Came here from tiktok, loved this video! Keep up the good work you’re both amazing!
This is a really great video, thanks so much for being so helpful with micro expressions. :)
Hate or extreme indifference to deep suffering? Hopefully, he isn't Machevaillian too boot. I have been treated like garbage and refuse to see myself as a victim, even tho the betrayal cuts deep in me.
The saddest part is our existence is an existential threat to their warped reality. You remember in your body what horrors they did to you as an innocent child.... who wasn't good enough, for them.
My friend actually dislikes people and is extremely avoidant to most people, but he was born with a face that makes people want to sit next to him and start telling him about their divorce etc..
Thanks, - I have studied a little of this, but what to DO with what I notice in others? As my bank chief deceived me, and a Dr, and a psychologist, I saw and felt it in the air, but was /am too traumatized, stress-exhausted and inexperienced to know how to deal with them. And I didn't want their deceptin, betrayals to be true but wishfully thought.
Me also I get so exhausted .....please atop
I don’t think we’ve forgotten them it’s become an awareness thing you can see it and have it subconsciously but you aren’t able to pinpoint it
intuition :D
This was so good 🙂
Awesome and useful info.
Is it possible to put some plants or a window on the side of the set with your guest? Some element of nature? 🌿 I think it might help since the set seems it isn’t lit with natural light. Great content! The sound is excellent!
What a great lesson. I really love the questions asked here. Took lots of notes. Thanks for sharing!
"Everybody struggles with themselves", thank you,-maybe that's what the chief psychiatrist meant in 1998 as he said toió me: " We are in the same boat" I have vexedly wondered what on earth he meant, since he was healthy, powerful, at ease, liked and loved, a smooth, nice speaker (Gemini), married with child, - whereas I was traumatized, diseased, sleepless, alone, unsure, , powerless, penniless, friendless(= intimacy), unmarried, childless.If he were the captain of the ship, I was back-bound lying down in the cargo room like n object, a merchandise. a nobody...
Being single and childfree can be very powerful. A great channel for learning to cherish it is sovereign woman another one is Tera Chantelle
Thank you 🦋
The way guy reacted when she said 'you gotta ask her' 🤣🤣🤣
Yea well it was bad advice and he knew it 😂 . She’s amazing and fascinating but not that great at dating advice lol . I’m a woman and I don’t want a guy I just met (first date kinda thing) to just straight up ASK me “Hey so you like me or what?” talk about *killing* the romance .It’s best to finesse a bit. Feel each other out, it’s a dance…Let your actions, facial expressions, gaze etc say what you feel. Flirt. Don’t treat it like a business deal you have to close right away. That kinda kills attraction and excitement for most women actually 🤷🏻♀️ Now once you’ve gotten to know each other and have flirted and dated a bit, THEN you become more upfront and vulnerable .
Wow she is so smart love it
Crossing arms is comfortable for me. It means nothing except in context
Thank you
Magnificent
I learned toread bodylanguage pretty fast when I moved to another country and didn t understand the language.
3:04 "look at the mouth area". All good unless someone has a beard and a moustache.
I work with someone like this and her facial expressions are actually more recognizable than I feel comfortable with. It’s just me and her in the office, so I don’t have too many distractions. One day she texted the boss something that was meant for someone else and she said very awful things reading it. She apologized ( narcissistic mortification I’m sure). It’s awkward now but I’m good at pretending I’m over it to keep the peace. (Btw I’m the bosses wife)..
I love this woman! ❤ how come she is single? So smart and beautiful!
Some women have decentered men. They enjoy life in sisterhood safety and peace while all of this can exist w a male partner some have given up trying to make it work or finding and trying.
Now that I’ve watched this video I’ll never be able to touch things. 😂😂
I think it would be useful for Annie to listen, or even better, to meet with Mathew Hussey. I suspect she doesn't know who he is and what he does either. Him and his wife Audrey are truly helping people to build relationships with much more practical advice. She looks very tired and somewhat disconnected from today's world.
I studied with the most Nobel laureates in the number one college in world in this study. I don't mean to be a bitch.. Most of what she is saying was disproven in the late 80's. Sorry. I also lived in 8 countries and studied abroad for 30 years so I really differ. Eye contact is very different based on context. I do agree with the arm crossed thing but that was dismissed 30 years ago, I do appreciate a lot if what she says but so much has been proven wrong This is pop stuff . The mere mention of Greys dismisses her. The eye change can happen if a women is going through changes in hormonal issues, its physical. not emotional
Thank you. I have not traveled or studied and have lots of trauma in my past and have figure these things out from simple observation.
Once you realize that wisdom and intellect are two totally different intelligences.
The physical body, the emotional body, and the psyche, are connected, always, and cannot be separated. I don’t know where you “studied”, but you were fed an agenda of lies.
i would never believe a 'study' that came of on institution....human nature and institutions are polar opposites. i know people that went to universities...they are as far away from being human as is possible. i certainly wouldn't believe anything someone who has the 'human' trained out of them to tell me they did a study on what it means to be 'human'. what a contradiction...
Aroused? I don’t know, most mornings I’m not looking for action when I wake, but. 💪🏼
I thought I was crazy bc I could “ read” people’s microexpressions
Actually, it only matters in context. Generally one cannot assume how someone feels.
@@MasterRoss-sn7dl thanks thats correct! Assumptions make us get wrong impressions
I make all kinds of facial expressions and they are often misread. A surprised face is the same as a look of a mortified face.
I may be on the autism spectrum. I have been accused of being overacting while just trying to express friendliness and interest. Maybe things r similar fr you
Camera example is not very good, because it can be applied to a selfish parson as well. So it might be that they think you don't know what you are talking about and they know better.
For Annie, not heard of Bruce Lipton is an interesting fact...🤔
Honestly, I don't care if anyone hates me. Gfys
I have lived in 28 countries over 36 years and still do. Swedish is not a difficult language for English speakers to learn. Try Korean where I live?
Hey Gary just out of interest, which country has your preference ? Im trying to find mine 😊
it's not difficult if you are intelligent and your peers intelligently support you.
Annie is obviously. But I also found it odd to say, at sixteen a language is hard to learn?
Imagine though some random as American highschool punks.
Congratulations G. I've tried Korean, ridiculous
This is so yummy ...Love it ..Thank you ..🔥
My pipules are always dialated :DDD
"I, I, I...Me, me, me."
All she talks about is herself. I expected more. I'm done here.
Was it the intro editing or the jumpy figure of speech making it hard to understand?
Great interview.
Micro expressions aren't much more reliable than Fortune cookies but if you're willing to bet your well-being on it by all means have at it. The science isn't there....
I am reading this woman as a bit neurotic and more victim of PTSD and over reading others expressions. These ppl shouldn’t have platform
And who gives a damn that they don't?
You keep saying "especially men" feel this way, but it also applies to women.. You feel that way from your perspective, but it's just as common to feel that way as a woman.
A third of the people will like you; a third of the people will hate you, usually for no reason related to you; and a third of the people won’t even notice you. The End.
We all have trauma ....
I am in awe of how complicated she is making this...
Its simple human observation... It does not require all this assessment and game playing...
This woman has characteristics of covert narcissist that i have met.
exactly lol.. it's like you either get along with someone or you don't, just trust your instincts and move on to more important things. she's a control freak.
Intuition covers all of this. It’s all obvious to people with intact intuition.
There are people who really miss the signs though. Have you seen Dateline?
@@Jess-kn8vlwillfully ignoring red flags!!! Have u seen “evil lives here”?
She absolutely is a narcissist. Gives off cult-y vibes. Quackery
The masks caused children to not develop the recognition of facial expressions. We’ll find out what the long term ramifications of that will be in the future, and it’s not going to be pretty.
They weren’t completely prevented from reading and learning about facial expressions when at with their family.
@@staciacrick3373 keep making excuses for evil. I guess that’s what you have to do to justify your own conscious, because deep down you know it’s wrong.
People with no emotional empathy are better at reading facial expressions because that don’t have emotional empathy and want to manipulate others while abused people learn to read facial expressions out of their own survival and to mitigate further abuse. There is no evil only the negative effects of childhood trauma. Narcissists come from childhood abuse. Nothing to do with good and evil and more about how people cope with their trauma
@@staciacrick3373 God exists, and Satan exists. There is good, and there is evil. You don’t have to believe it.
@@swisschalet1658 You are correct I don't have magical thinking and am more interested in research, science and what can be proven.. Furthermore, no one can prove or disprove any GOD and so many people lose their critical thinking, and simplify issues that have nuances into good and bad, evil and saints. Never met a narcissist or sociopath who didn't experience child abuse along with unfortunate genetics contributing to their disorder and psychopaths have brain abnormalities. You can attribute that to GOD thereby making your life much easier to be self-righteous and maybe even play the victim. You do you and live in your magical Swiss Chalet where there is no need for emotional empathy or intellectual curiosity. Take Care
You can’t always read facial expressions. This is not good
I totally agree when she described you.I'm 53 and you are , or seem to very much be a handsome, articulate, charming real…a genuine human being. Brian you are real…I believe anyway. Don't change a thing, lol. Seriously, don't be anyone else but you.🙄 (holy crap cheese or what)
What would he look like if he weren't real?
@@CJ-ov1pllol kinda evil maybe a bit of a bad boy? 😂
This woman makes everything TOO complicated. You dont need to assess someines every move.
Its alnost tragic how difficult she makes this.
She’s a bit of a quack
This seems like your judging someone instead of ACTUALLY knowing what they are feeling seems like a little BS
She’s nuts, I’m a therapist.
She’s also narcissistic
This woman is full of b…s….
Sounds like she was on the overseas carousel for a quarter century plus ………………………………. hmmm …………………………… and one of the first things she said was she comes from a troubled family ………………………………….. a parenthetical poster child for daddy issues ……………………………..