Although I wouldn't wake my child up, you get the idea: make it easier for them to listen to you than it is to ignore/forget etc. and in a kind and empathetic manner. Their materials really are beneficial.
Ok... I was not real keen on waking my boys- ages 4, 4, and 6. When I told them their room needed to be cleaned before bed, and I explained what would happen if they didn't. 3 times I woke them up in the middle of the night to clena their room. They cried the ENTIRE TIME- bawling, screaming, the whole 9 yards. The last time I told my son they needed to clean, he said to me, "Can you just wake me up in the middle of the night cuz I don't want to do it now." HOW do you deal with that???
My 17 year old son is in charge of trash and recycling. If he forgets to set an alarm on his phone and bring the trash to the street for the trash man, he then spends the week finding a dumpster to bring all of our trash to. Much more difficult than just taking it out in the first place
for Owensark, I would have to change up the consequence. The children can pay you to do it with their most prized possessions or money. The consequence needs to be uncomfortable enough to make them want to remember to do the chore on their own.
There is no way my kid would get out of bed upon asking. What kid do you have?! Is there a consequence tied to it? My son has severe adhd! I’m curious how this works!?
Check out this audio. www.loveandlogic.com/products/chores I think you'll find that it can work. Also, keep in mind that the getting out of bed may not work, but we have various options and you can find one that works for your family.
I'm keeping an open mind, and maybe I'm misunderstanding, but this sounds totally passive aggressive-or maybe not even passive but actively manipulative. I knew a woman, she's a grandmother now, whose father parented this way and she ended up pretty traumatized and developed some hard core anxiety about cleaning. The process instilled fear, she was motivated to complete tasks afraid of the consequences. It didn't instill respect or love. Someone told me there is a book?
Hi Elizabeth, thank you for your interest in our skills. We'd love to explain more to you. We are just a phone call away, 800-338-4065. We use lots of empathy, while preparing them for the real world and learning how to make appropriate choices. As well as learn about making poor choices, the consequences that come with them and making amends and learning and growing from that while the price tags are small. We have so many resources available which the authors provide lots of insight into these skills. www.loveandlogic.com
There’s a mom who was on UA-cam who followed a lot of these bizarre tactics and is now in jail for torturing and abusing her kids. I remember seeing a clip of her not waking her preschooler up in time for prek and telling her she missed it for sleeping in, and with the same 4 year old, she forgot her lunchbox and the mom wouldn’t bring her lunch and went as far as telling the camera she hopes no one at school gives her food so she learns her lesson. I can see the point of teaching kids through natural consequences but there is a line between treating them like they aren’t humans who don’t have fully developed brains. I like some of the L&L approach, but this kind of stuff feels off to me.
best phrase for cleaning up: "You keep the toys you pick up, I'll keep the toys I pick up" Then follow through.
This is a great site to send parents. They can get the flavor of L & L before attending the full course.
Although I wouldn't wake my child up, you get the idea: make it easier for them to listen to you than it is to ignore/forget etc. and in a kind and empathetic manner. Their materials really are beneficial.
Ok... I was not real keen on waking my boys- ages 4, 4, and 6. When I told them their room needed to be cleaned before bed, and I explained what would happen if they didn't. 3 times I woke them up in the middle of the night to clena their room. They cried the ENTIRE TIME- bawling, screaming, the whole 9 yards. The last time I told my son they needed to clean, he said to me, "Can you just wake me up in the middle of the night cuz I don't want to do it now." HOW do you deal with that???
wake him up alright
This is absolutely beautiful!!!! Hahahaha!
My 17 year old son is in charge of trash and recycling. If he forgets to set an alarm on his phone and bring the trash to the street for the trash man, he then spends the week finding a dumpster to bring all of our trash to. Much more difficult than just taking it out in the first place
for Owensark, I would have to change up the consequence. The children can pay you to do it with their most prized possessions or money. The consequence needs to be uncomfortable enough to make them want to remember to do the chore on their own.
“Oaky Doke” ahaha
Tried that. She woke up, washed the dishes, stacked them up so high, it went crashing onto the floor. 😒
There is no way my kid would get out of bed upon asking. What kid do you have?! Is there a consequence tied to it? My son has severe adhd! I’m curious how this works!?
Check out this audio. www.loveandlogic.com/products/chores
I think you'll find that it can work. Also, keep in mind that the getting out of bed may not work, but we have various options and you can find one that works for your family.
I think I would not wake them up. I would do an energy drain, or let them pay me in toys
I'm keeping an open mind, and maybe I'm misunderstanding, but this sounds totally passive aggressive-or maybe not even passive but actively manipulative. I knew a woman, she's a grandmother now, whose father parented this way and she ended up pretty traumatized and developed some hard core anxiety about cleaning. The process instilled fear, she was motivated to complete tasks afraid of the consequences. It didn't instill respect or love. Someone told me there is a book?
Hi Elizabeth, thank you for your interest in our skills. We'd love to explain more to you. We are just a phone call away, 800-338-4065. We use lots of empathy, while preparing them for the real world and learning how to make appropriate choices. As well as learn about making poor choices, the consequences that come with them and making amends and learning and growing from that while the price tags are small. We have so many resources available which the authors provide lots of insight into these skills. www.loveandlogic.com
There’s a mom who was on UA-cam who followed a lot of these bizarre tactics and is now in jail for torturing and abusing her kids. I remember seeing a clip of her not waking her preschooler up in time for prek and telling her she missed it for sleeping in, and with the same 4 year old, she forgot her lunchbox and the mom wouldn’t bring her lunch and went as far as telling the camera she hopes no one at school gives her food so she learns her lesson.
I can see the point of teaching kids through natural consequences but there is a line between treating them like they aren’t humans who don’t have fully developed brains. I like some of the L&L approach, but this kind of stuff feels off to me.