Who is actually faithful? The woman incapable of cheating? Or the woman who knows better than to put herself into a situation where cheating is an option?
This is why so many men aren't wanting to get married anymore. Her husband busts his butt and built his own business to provide a good life for his family and this lady decides to go cheat and blame it on him because he isn't giving her enough attention for a few months of the year. Then they go to court and she gets half of his stuff. Its insane. Women like this make us look so bad.
Used to be conversations between the boys about how hot a woman is and now it's about never getting married or even dating. Guys are going back to the hit it and quit it mentality. Much easier and still have loads of money
@@memecakes4436 Not statistically, Statistically men are by and large most resistant to marriage across the board. And the number of men who are resistant is growing at absurd rates
@@ColorfulHaze and the guy was probably talking to another woman on tinder about an hour after she betrayed her husband for a quick thrill and some playas nut all over her cheeks. Women ☕
Obviously not John's fault, but everything inside me says this woman is going to drop off a hotel key to this guy. She sounds way too excited to cheat. She actually sounds excited about it - and I don't think there's any talking her out of it... She's blaming her husband working long hours... She just wants a fling.
Yep, her mind is already made up. What did she expect John to say? Surely she didn’t expect for him to say “Yeah sure go do it”. People are weird. She is going to feel like she is missing something until she plays with fire and gets burned.
1st of all she's not blaming the husband 2nd she's a human being 3rd the call is an attempt to find an emotionally compelling reason not to cheat 4th you lack empathy 5th she has already emotionally cheated so it might to late
@@miguelbrito9910 all nonsense and excuses. Emotional support for what? Grow up! Empathy for what? Blowing up your family because someone is cute? Explain that to the kids.
I find her to be disgustingly nonchalant about betraying her husband and destroying her children’s family and home life. Take responsibility for your urges and snap out of it. You won’t fix your marriage by running to another man and stop laughing about it as you talk about it. Your husband and kids deserve better.
That's what gets me...the children. For a "cute guy"? Unreal. She is worried she "won't be able to stop herself". What completely and total nonsense. Just DONT DO IT. Good lord.
I see this point but also give her credit for calling to tell on herself before taking action. It’s a call for help, literally. I think she’s doing her best to fight the temptation, to get advice on how to stop engaging with it - or she would have gotten the hotel already.
The sad thing is her marriage already sounds pretty good! Married to a nice, good looking guy, successful family business…so many women would want that! The only thing she had to complain about is that it’s busy season for her husband’s part of the business, but what marriage doesn’t go through busy seasons? She’s about to set fire to her whole life over a fantasy. Ridiculous.
As a man who went through this - it’s an absolute blessing. I would feel bad for the new guy, he will find over time there isn’t any value in a partner like this.
I feel bad for her husband also, but I think this is fixable. The grass is greener on the other side, but the grass is greener wherever we water it. It just looks greener on the other side.
“My husband is great, and this guy seems great.” She’s gonna regret this if she loses her husband. A guy who is willing to sleep with another man’s wife is not “great”, no matter what he SEEMS to be.
She's rationalizing him being great, she's just physically attracted to him and wants to scratch that itch. If she goes through with it he won't want anything to do with her as she cheated on her husband. She will lose everything and she will find out single life as an older women is where she will end up. Her husband might want to think about this relationship. Men or women don't want to be with a cheater in a monogamous relationship.
I have a coworker who sleeps with married women and then expose them to their husbands. He always calls them idiots for assuming that he'd want them for anything more than just sx, knowing that they cheat on their husbands.
@@charlesekpima8210 💯 %. She's definitely got ran through in her twenties and the husband was a high earning but average looking introvert that she settled for after she was bored of the c.o.c.k carousel. Feel sorry for the guy.
Yes, and once they cheat, often most will get a guilt trip on themselves and then they'll provoke an end to the marriage, and then lay blame to that provocation rather than blame themselves for having sex with someone else. It's a cover for what they did. And they know once they cheat, it's done usually.
Actions and thoughts. First the thoughts entertain the actions, which we would say is lust. Jesus said to just after someone is to commit adultery. Guard your heartb with all diligence, says Proverbs 4, for the rivers of life spring from it.
Also: finding other people attractive might not be sinful per se but it might hint that one's mind is not fully fixed to the spouse in Christian marriage.
@@hoosier-daddy777 The husband is 100 percent a cliche nice guy with some nerdy hobbies and a reserved personality, that she settled for after being ran through all throughout her twenties. Now she's bored of him and what's a bad boy to sleep with on the side while the high salary earning husband continues to fund her lifestyle. Seen it so many times before it's laughable. It's a broken record at this point. Marrying a woman these days is literally one of the dumbest decisions a man can make in his life.
I don't see what you see. What I see: She is searching for reasons not to metaphorically "drop a grenade in her own lap", because it it tempting. I'm proud of this woman for calling in.
She cheated on husband for no reason but calls a radio station for validation for bad behavior, tell your husband before somebody show his this online ,modern woman no accountability but expect no conquenes. Her husband deserve a better wife
Probably already has. Sounds at least 42 years old. The guy she wants to have an affair with is probably average looking and she's deluded into thinking it's Henry Cavill just because he wants to use her for an easy lay when she's past her prime. Seen it way too many times before at this point. People will say it's misogynistic saying this but more than half of woman on this planet just aren't worth it anymore.
I can guarantee Dr. John’s tone would have been completely different if it were a guy calling under the exact same circumstances. If it had been a man, he would have immediately assumed there was more going on in the background probably accusing him of already cheating or worse. Yet in this case, he doesn’t even challenge her when she says the man found her ‘cute’ and would take a hotel key to meet her. How does a work conversation even escalate to someone saying, ‘You’re cute’? How does she know he’d sleep with her if she asked? This has clearly gone far beyond fantasy or speculation, yet none of this was addressed.
We don’t see each other and my husband is such a hard worker, working long hours supporting our family, so to show my appreciation I’m going to go have a fling… wow. This lady needs to grow up.
Right ! This is totally how she said it too ! I didn’t hear a single bad thing , not he is addicted to blah blah blah and doesn’t show me time or any of that , she just said he works hard and he is great .. this girl is so dumb if she cheats. Blowing up her life over someone who will turn out to not be perfect ! No one is
When did this caller say she was going to have a fling? Acknowledging temptation =\= intention to succumb to temptation. I would say speaking it out loud and getting the reality check to not fan the flames (in your own head) points to an effort to not succumb.
@@Kroh13 Of course she didn't say anything single bad thing about her husband. It's because she's taking accountability for herself. She knows the blame lies with her and not with her husband. This is points in her favor that she's actually trying to do the right thing
Observe, think/reason then speak/do. Seems like she is not putting/failing to see value in her marriage before speaking. Unfortunately have seen this before. Additionally seems like people accept the idea of over speaking every thought in their mind, instead of just stop those which are nonsense.
Recognizing physical attractiveness in someone of the opposite sex is a Hell of a lot different from developing infatuation for that individual. No comparison.
She is blessed with a good life and family. Someone said yes to doing life with you. Focus on being grateful for what you have rather than what you don't.
If you ever find yourself about to destroy your life to fan some flame, just remember that your relationship with your spouse probably started out the same way. At one time, your heart quickened whenever he called and every touch sent a shiver up your spine. That is how virtually every marriage starts. It’s the launch sequence that gets your relationship off the ground. Eventually, if you allow it to happen, the fireworks mature into something better. Real love that has stood the test of time because it’s based on respect and commitment is very comfortable and sweet. If you dump your spouse to chase the flame and by some miracle it actually turns into a real relationship, just understand that the fireworks you’re feeling right now are on a countdown. That won’t continue, and by the time it dies down, you will have broken your husband’s heart, destroyed the lives of your children, and will probably end up alone anyway. The way this woman is cackling about setting fire to her life like a silly teenage girl doesn’t sound promising. Her poor husband is the victim here.
I feel sorry for the husband. He works hard to provide for his wife and keeps himself in shape … all so that she can flirt with and fantasize about this other dude.
@@jh26pt2 that’s exactly what you made this call to be about in your comment. Thus I replied to your comment. Insecurity in people especially men is gross no way around it and if a man can’t handle the fact that his wife gf or whatever thinks another man or woman is attractive it speaks to that man’s inability to respect himself and respect his significant other as a person. She’s hasn’t acted in anything it’s all in her mind. Why would anyone try and fight with a fantasy? That’s like tryna box with God. It’s simply a waste of time and energy. Focus on what you can do better. That’s it that’s all
Her legs are in the air and she doesn’t even know it. I think she’s over her husband and is using this guy as an excuse to get out of it all. Sadly, a lustful desire for someone other than your husband is no laughing matter and should be addressed before an affair is introduced to her family. 😢
when someone says “I don’t know if I can trust myself” that’s a serious red flag. They are simultaneously showing a severe lack of self control AND trying to take some if not all of the blame/responsibility off of themself.
Oh she is going to cheat, she enjoyed this conversation WAY too much. Giggling & laughing the entire time, this is cute & funny to her. She loves thinking about this other guy & has completely immersed herself in the fantasy.
Yep, she already has "cheated" in her mind, she just hasn't had the nuts to have the new guy bury everything but his inside her yet. But she is going to continue to have it build up in her mind until she throws herself at the new guy and ends up ruining the "perfect" life she had over 10 mins of some strange d1ck. She won't realize how much this isn't worth it until after she physically cheats and that new guy fling is over and she wakes up 2 years later and the husband has moved on to a better woman who was looking for a good man, a good man she had but threw away. And she probably will spend the rest of her life looking for that again but will never have it. All the memories she would've had w husband and kids will never get to happen, and she'll never forgot the 8 mins with the new guy not because it lived up to the hype but because that experience cost her everything she didn't even realize she had
Finding other people attractive is normal… saying things like “Trying to stay faithful” and “I’m trying to trust myself not to have affair…” is CRAZY. And she’s saying it while laughing! 🥴
I'm trying to give her the benefit of doubt and say she is laughing because she's nervous. But idk. It sounds like she's already been living in the fantasy for too long to see reality
Kudos to the lady for being vurnerable and taking feedback. Great job to the host of the show for being absolutely clear in his explanations. Great job!!
I think social media is to blame, it literally promotes narcissism. Do whatever makes you happy, that’s all that matters. Every time I talk to a woman who cheats, there’s a 1,000,000 justifications, almost all of them are bunk.
The giggling and the fact that she knows if she lit up the “Hot Now” sign he would show up feels much more like a prelude to action than addressing how to move forward and manage these feelings. If I were the husband and heard this call, I’d likely be out because I don’t hear any concern or regrets, she seems to be enjoying this way too much.
@@cmnhl1329 if we act like she has already cheated physically and condemn her for that, she’ll never know the power of forgiveness or the value of catching herself before any deeper, less retractable harm is done. I think this call says the most about her character - that she’d rather stop herself from sinking to sin like this than risk living with it one more day. I pray she find the support and grace she needs to take courage into the next chapter of her life she will need.
@ amen thank you 🙏 We are each of us born to sin - not many have this much courage to call ourselves out publicly for our transgressions so who am I to judge? I see her trying to do the right thing and struggling. And reaching for help and getting it. I see wisdom in her and therefore hope for her marriage.
The fact that she KNOWS this other guy finds her attractive means they've had some sort of conversation about it, which to me is already being unfaithful... This very much seems like she's already having an emotional affair and I'm kind of surprise that was never mentioned. Hopefully she realizes this is *her problem and she needs to get her focus back on her marriage and family and move on from this fling and put in the work with the man she chose to live her forever with.
@Michelle-gg7hn I agree. Dr. John should have drilled deeper to find out how far this has gone. From what we were told it is very likely that she has been and is currently having an emotional affair with this man, and to the extent that has happened she has been cheating in a sense already. Kudos to you as a woman for looking at the other side of the equation and considering what this woman is doing to her husband already
She’s already made her mind up, she’s too comfortable talking about wanting to do it and how “she’s so afraid “ of taking the next step bc she doesn’t “trust herself”. This call was her proving (to herself? Or her husband? Idk) that she tried not to.. that she made an effort to get advice.. before doing what she’s going to do regardless. She’s made the decision & she’s made peace with it. Her giggling and entire demeanour screams excitement. She’s almost giddy talking about it. She doesn’t sound torn or guilty at all.. This lady is absolutely going to cheat. 💯 😂
She doesn't realize, usually the guy she cheats with doesn't want to have a life with her, he just wants to diddly-do, and then he's on to the next one! and she will feel discarded and betrayed.. or.. she'll find the next "cute" guy..
There are two sides of the internet. One trying to talk sense in to this woman to keep her from ruining lives, and the other telling her to be free and empower herself to do whatever makes her feel good.
It’s funny, I listen, I get triggered…. And then I realize the bliss of being single and not having to waste my life with someone like this. True peace.
I try so hard not to be too judgmental of people I don't personally know, but damn this woman just irritates me SO MUCH. The entitlement, the giggling, the whole attitude... yugh.
I thought it was just me. I'll bet money I don't even have yet she'll be having a full-blown affair soon. She doesn't really sound like she's wanting to be talked OUT of it, to be honest. 🤷🏻♀️
I think many married people become attracted to other people at one time or another… it’s how you act and what you do with that. She said herself that she was enjoying the fantasy of who he might be, etc…. A lot of the time, it’s the attention and the fact that a new person is looking again that gets people caught up. In the end, it’s best to keep yourself focused on your marriage and why you love your partner. This is how affairs happen if people get carried away.
yea, i think its not ok to fantasize because adultery in the heart is still adultery but also the reason i think that holds true is that fantasy’s are often what lead to actions, but it still happens to the best of us because thats just human nature but in the end were always given a choice weather to act on temptation or repent and work to be a better person.
It’s wild to me that people are so internally damaged. I have been in situations with women I found attractive and the only thoughts I have in my mind are of how much damage I would do to my family by choosing this selfishness and that’s all I need to want no part of it, well that and my integrity.
I’ve had several women over the years that were a little too touchy with me to be a professional environment. Had she not been married I’d think she was flirting. But I just passed it off as her being friendly
To me the most telling part is how resistant she is when he provides ideas to bring a spark to her own marriage. He suggests Dirty texts and surprises to get that spark. She just laughs it off. The truth is this goes beyond attraction and borderlines on obsession. I know he didn't say this cause he was more focused on triage. But the fact is being attracted to someone is normal.Obsessing over a fantasy with someone is NOT normal. She is already emotionally cheating even if the other guy isn't involved. Also listen to the way she floats off her Husband's contributions to the family. It's pretty obvious she has no respect for him. That's the other way you know cheating is on the horizon. She sees. Her contributions as this overwhelming burden and he is as just a matter of course, In her eyes he's doing what is required of him at the bare minimum and she is doing him a favor by working hard. She feels. She should be rewarded for that in on some level. She thinks the rewards should be this fantasy. At no point does she think about her husband's rewards or what he deserves. The fact that she has a very focused self serving point of view, As long as she focuses on herself and her wants cheating will be inevitable
Starts off with “I’m trying to be faithful…..” Dr. Delony should have told her that her husband can probably do better than her. Heck, even staying single is WAY better than being married to someone like this.
@@BrianWaller-qe7gr I'm sorry for whatever happened to you. I understand bro. This is what happens when we marry the wrong people God didn't intend for us
100% she's already emotionally cheating. This would damage the husband tremendously if she was transparent with him, but she's not. She's a selfish self absorbed woman child.
she literally said she's sick and tired of the daily routine of marriage and family life. She's not only gonna cheat, but if she were younger and beautiful, she'd be a flight risk. She would leave it all if there were a man who would adopt her.
@@plousia Statistically it is more unlikely than a secular person, since worshipping a false God is further from God than refusing to worship anything. Though I could be and hope that I am wrong. I will pray for her.
Why is this so hard for people.... "it's so hard to not get the hotel room and have an affair"... No, it's bloody easy to not book a hotel, certainly easier to no book than it is to book.
Not that I'm condoning their actions... but they're sway by their emotions. I have ex-friends who cheated on their partners because they become infatuated easily, which then guides them to affairs. They definitely need a lot of self work because they expect others to complete them.
@@mg8459mg almost everyone is susceptible to this, it's not because some people are "more emotionally swayed" than others - it's because they lack self-control. Affairs don't happen in a day, they brew over time because of a series of bad decisions until feelings become too difficult to control. For example: a married man may have a conversation with an attractive coworker, and she starts flirting with him. Anyone would feel some excitement from this, but a faithful man changes the subject or leaves. The future cheater entertains the conversation and tells themselves "I won't let this go any further than that". But that excitement is like a drug. Maybe you'll only use it once, but chances are you'll try it again and want more and more of it. If you want to stay faithful, you have to shut down anything that could lead to an affair.
When I clicked, I wanted to appreciate the woman calling for admitting something hard. But to get away talk about another man. To have zero shame in your voice to the point of giggling and laughter talking about the idea of cheating on your devoted husband. Then you want to turn around and cry that he's at work a lot? She did a pretty good job of manipulating in this call. I wish John had been more harsh
How would SHE feel if it was the other way around? Her husband being attracted to another woman because she is just not lighting up his world. Sexuality really messes with a persons head. The "growing up" process doesn't stop when we turn 18. And we make many mistakes. She sounds like she's trying to deal with them but may anyway cause a "car wreck". There are no guarantees in the outcome. Not even that the "other guy" would/could reciprocate.
Dr. John, I think you handled this call very well. I think without realizing it I have a similar approach when I give advice but didn't notice it until I heard you do it... you acknowledge their feelings are real, their fantasy is real, and it's not crazy. Then you try to bring them back to the reality of it all and point out it's fantasy. I sure hope this woman listened. Many don't fully grasp what you're telling them and can't squash the fantasy. Of she cheats she'll regret it, call back in, and still not take your advice.
Women are all about the 'feels' guys, be smart , always pay attention, never make her feel that she has got you for granted... Be a bit flirtuous (not disrespectful ) with other women in front of her sometimes, make her feel a bit jealous sometimes, and loved and reassured most of the time, the roller coaster of 'feels' is key to keep her always desiring you and likely faithful.
The question arises, why do men care? Women aren't caring about men having to be sexually satisfied and enticed, they are always fine with remaining sexless, laying like a fish on the bed, absolutely zero positive reinforcement yet we are supposed to be their personal jesters just so we aren't cheated on? Women don't have that problem since they get rewarded for divorces anyways.
I feel so bad for her nice-guy husband. He will soon be presented with divorce papers and have to pay half of his retirement plan to the caller, owe years of alimony & child support, be lucky to see his broken kids every other weekend, sell the house to pay equity to the cheater & move into an apartment next to rowdy neighbors, and work until at least 70+ if he lives that long. The caller's new studs will have more influence on the children than the father will. It's a sad story that keeps playing out because cheating wives get rewarded for their bad behavior.
Exactly. The laws in the US are Evil and on top of that, Women have been programmed to destroy families, a perfect recipe for the compete destruction of the nuclear family.
Oh the life of this husband. Work super hard to build a life for your family and then your wife gets lonely because your not around so then she starts thinking about cheating and then you have to stop working out ( which is probably how you stay mentally healthy as well as physically) so that you can do even more work that she doesn't want to do so that she doesn't leave you and take half of everything you worked so hard for. Sounds like the dude shoukd have picked a better wife, .but i guess not everyone can be as blessed as me, thank you lord for what youve given me.
Those are the calls that get clicks, so those are the calls they put through. It might not be representative of the real world, but it is representative of what viewers want.
Brother imagine being a gender where you've grown up learning that you were soo soo oppressed by men. Men did this or that to you. And you take that victimisation to heart even if you didn't face it, have abundance of options from tinder to bumble, having not to life a finger to get a date or a hookup, ofcourse it is easier to cheat. Men really don't matter since the power dynamics in dating have always been in women's advantage. Read about what women like to read as erotica and you'll see their true nature. We catch the dust too often just because our fantasies are more visual and straightforward. But women read or consume smut of whole another level.
I always found that fascinating, how people talk about marriage being a lot of hard work. I already have a job, why would I want another one when I get home?
“I’m trying to stay faithful to my husband” That tells me what I need to know. You don’t have to “try” you are either a faithful person or you are not.
@@evanl889 I disagree. there's a reason fidelity is considered a virtue - everyone is tempted, only some are strong/wise enough to resist it. I just don't think she's really trying because she continuing to flirt and entertain a fantasy with this guy.
Exactly. You don’t need to try to be faithful, you just need to remain faithful which means creating healthy defensive habits that don’t put your relationship in harms way and protect your partner. This means if someone at work feels they can tell you that you are cute, you have not put this in place. Married people that want to stay married are not approachable, period.
Actually life's not entirely black and white. Maybe you should think about that before you say something that makes you sound like a moron who's incapable of nuanced thought.
Marriage takes work on both ends. Dates, breaks from work, active listening, encouraging each other's dreams, putting effort into yourself and yes also showing restraint when temptation comes.
Her playful attitude tells me she doesn't want to have an affair because of the consequences of what she may lose. Not because of wanting to fulfill her covenant of marriage by being faithful.
Also, the other guy is not a good guy. He knows what he's doing and willing to sleep with a married woman not caring about the consequences of destroying a family.
Can't agree more with the statement @9:20. "The moment your husband gets a shield on and a sword out to go to war for the family, that's when you think "I'm gonna go bang the neighbor"." I was only in the Army for 4 years, but I've been through it personally and seen it happen an alarming amount of times. It's difficult not to be pessimistic about the world and relationships in general.
I’ve been dealing with this kind of thing professionally for over 30 years. I’ve seen a lot of things. This woman has already cheated with this guy or will very soon. Often, people go to counseling looking for validation for what they have already decided to do. And with due respect for John, he is 110 wrong. There is absolutely NOTHING NORMAL .about being infatuated with someone when you’re married or in a relationship. None!! The two are mutually exclusive. If you or your partner is infatuated with someone else, your relationship is in serious trouble and you would do well to fix the problem,
Bingo! I've heard him say plenty of times that having a crush is okay as long as you don't act on it and its of course utter bullshit. If my husband told me he had a crush on someone I would organise divorce papers ASAP.
Absolutely. John and I have drastically different moral compasses. But I can’t believe he would be ok with his wife being infatuated with someone else. 🤔
And having listened again, he openly stated that “many affairs happen in really good marriages.” I can’t wrap my head around a man in his business and my own saying something like that! I’m wondering if he might be revealing a part of his own moral compass??
Props to this woman for calling in and for getting help. Also great job John nailing down what the problem is. Sounds like she needs to have a tough talk with her husband, but at least she can have an informed discussion of exactly what is bothering her. Hope they get it figured out!
I can totally understand finding someone attractive in a marriage, BUT DON'T validate feelings of having a crush. A crush is major different. She might even be past crush. Please just leave him. Or see this, my guy. She is probably going to do this. RUN!!!
@codedsoul7360 It is perfectly understandable and normal to find another person attractive. Attraction is what initially draws us to another person. And usually that attractive quality is something that is easily visible. Spending time with that person, discovering who they are, what they value etc will then help us to decide whether or not the person is a worthy partner or spouse. It is one thing for a spouse to find someone other than their spouse attractive. That is not offensive. What is offensive is when the spouse chooses to pursue someone they find attractive, to flirt with, fantasise and lust after them. By doing so they are choosing not to love their spouse. There is more than one person on this earth that could be a worthy spouse to us. However, when we choose a spouse and enter into a committed relationship, we make the choice to love, honour and respect our spouse and marriage relationship and not pursue others. Finding someone attractive who is not our spouse is not a sin. Making the choice to act on that attraction is the sin.The word 'love' is a verb. We choose to love our spouses via our behaviour and words. We do not love our spouse via our feelings. We feel loved or not loved because of the actions of our spouse. Hollywood has deceived many women by portraying love as solely feeling based and creating a narrative of 'the one and only' or 'my soulmate'.
There’s a HUGE difference between finding someone attractive and being attracted to someone. I’m happily newly married to my amazing and gorgeous wife, and find PLENTY of other women attractive. There’s not a cell in my body that is attracted TO anyone else. Ana De Armas and Margot Robbie are out of this world attractive, hell so are Ryan Gosling and Ryan Reynolds. Finding others attractive is human nature and there’s nothing remotely wrong with it, being attracted to someone else is a whole different thing
@@angelicaangel2624knowing someone is good looking and charming VS wanting them and wanting to be with them (like this lady who is fantasizing a scenario she KNOWS can happen in real life- he’s not just a cute guy, she WANTS him.)
That is correct. However I don't think being attracted to someone is a choice. There are plenty of men I find attractive and a small number of men I am attracted to. Neither of those things is a choice
@@angelicaangel2624 exactly what some others said. It’s simply acknowledged other peoples good looks or charm or whatever it is. Making a simple observation of “wow she’s attractive” and then moving on is a completely different thing than “wow that person is good looking and I want to have a relationship of some kind with them”
Now I see why some people won't get married or even date. If you're looking for trouble, you're going to find it! I could not imagine doing this to my spouse. Even when I'm mad at him I've never wanted anyone else. My spouse is my home. When he's working long hours I get sad because I don't see him. I could never imagine trying to jump someone else's bones. Truly disgusting.
Loved how the host didn’t just shame her and actually walked through things instead of the comment section who just judged. We wonder why people don’t have anyone to talk to.
@@theeggreat4maybe the giggling came off as her feeling no guilt about the matter and she sure did enjoy the attention, however if she's truly not engaging and not acting on it, a fantasy is just a fantasy. Sometimes fantasies help people get through tough times Idk.
День тому
@@theeggreat4women should be shamed. This idea that shaming doesn't work is how we get the degenerate society we live in.
It’s completely normal to find other people attractive. But starting off with “I’m trying to stay faithful” indicates bad intentions
Yeah. Plus her laughing and sounding REALLY happy every time she talks about this guy
Hope her man hears this and does a pre-emptive strike with divorce papers.
Who is actually faithful? The woman incapable of cheating? Or the woman who knows better than to put herself into a situation where cheating is an option?
Bad intentions?? This gal full on says she wants to blow her life up because she's too busy lol
Facts
This is why so many men aren't wanting to get married anymore. Her husband busts his butt and built his own business to provide a good life for his family and this lady decides to go cheat and blame it on him because he isn't giving her enough attention for a few months of the year. Then they go to court and she gets half of his stuff. Its insane. Women like this make us look so bad.
You pretty much nailed it. Women are incentivized to divorce by winning cash and prizes
Tbf so many women don’t want to get married either.
Used to be conversations between the boys about how hot a woman is and now it's about never getting married or even dating. Guys are going back to the hit it and quit it mentality. Much easier and still have loads of money
@@memecakes4436 Not statistically, Statistically men are by and large most resistant to marriage across the board. And the number of men who are resistant is growing at absurd rates
Women like you are the reason some of us men still believe in marriage.
The grass is always greener when you water your lawn
I like that.👍
Don’t cut into it to deep, cause it will turn and stay yellow for a while 😉🫰
💚💚💚
But she wants wild flowers...
TikTok has hundreds of videos of women crying into their cameras after destroying their marriages because of a hot fling.
She hung up and booked that room 😂
😂😂yep
Lmaooo true
100%
She getting her cheeks clapped as we speak
@@ColorfulHaze and the guy was probably talking to another woman on tinder about an hour after she betrayed her husband for a quick thrill and some playas nut all over her cheeks. Women ☕
Obviously not John's fault, but everything inside me says this woman is going to drop off a hotel key to this guy. She sounds way too excited to cheat. She actually sounds excited about it - and I don't think there's any talking her out of it... She's blaming her husband working long hours... She just wants a fling.
1000%
Yep, her mind is already made up. What did she expect John to say? Surely she didn’t expect for him to say “Yeah sure go do it”. People are weird. She is going to feel like she is missing something until she plays with fire and gets burned.
HE TOLD HER TO DO IT THATS WHY
1st of all she's not blaming the husband
2nd she's a human being
3rd the call is an attempt to find an emotionally compelling reason not to cheat
4th you lack empathy
5th she has already emotionally cheated so it might to late
@@miguelbrito9910 all nonsense and excuses. Emotional support for what? Grow up! Empathy for what? Blowing up your family because someone is cute? Explain that to the kids.
I find her to be disgustingly nonchalant about betraying her husband and destroying her children’s family and home life. Take responsibility for your urges and snap out of it. You won’t fix your marriage by running to another man and stop laughing about it as you talk about it. Your husband and kids deserve better.
That's what gets me...the children. For a "cute guy"? Unreal. She is worried she "won't be able to stop herself". What completely and total nonsense. Just DONT DO IT. Good lord.
I see this point but also give her credit for calling to tell on herself before taking action. It’s a call for help, literally. I think she’s doing her best to fight the temptation, to get advice on how to stop engaging with it - or she would have gotten the hotel already.
@@brightpage1020 She seemed to want validation or for him to downplay it since she hadn’t acted yet. Her demeanor was very odd to me.
I was about to leave a mean comment after her very first sentence: I can guess what her physique is like based on her indulgence here.
The sad thing is her marriage already sounds pretty good! Married to a nice, good looking guy, successful family business…so many women would want that! The only thing she had to complain about is that it’s busy season for her husband’s part of the business, but what marriage doesn’t go through busy seasons? She’s about to set fire to her whole life over a fantasy. Ridiculous.
I feel bad for her husband
Yep married to a jezebel who does not live him
She's talking like her marriage is just like a job that she can easily shift to another one. Why marry when be this non serious.
Yeah she’s horrible. Hope he finds someone who actually cares about him
As a man who went through this - it’s an absolute blessing. I would feel bad for the new guy, he will find over time there isn’t any value in a partner like this.
I feel bad for her husband also, but I think this is fixable.
The grass is greener on the other side, but the grass is greener wherever we water it. It just looks greener on the other side.
“My husband is great, and this guy seems great.” She’s gonna regret this if she loses her husband. A guy who is willing to sleep with another man’s wife is not “great”, no matter what he SEEMS to be.
She's rationalizing him being great, she's just physically attracted to him and wants to scratch that itch. If she goes through with it he won't want anything to do with her as she cheated on her husband. She will lose everything and she will find out single life as an older women is where she will end up. Her husband might want to think about this relationship. Men or women don't want to be with a cheater in a monogamous relationship.
I have a coworker who sleeps with married women and then expose them to their husbands. He always calls them idiots for assuming that he'd want them for anything more than just sx, knowing that they cheat on their husbands.
The other guy probably doesn't want her, he definitely doesn't want to keep her.
She’s literally living in a fantasy world
@@standground8284is it that one black dude on TikTok?
He keeps saying
“I don’t think you like the reality of that”
And she keeps basically saying
“Yes, I really do.”
Lol this.
She has already committed the crime she just wants to know how bad it is
@@charlesekpima8210 💯 %. She's definitely got ran through in her twenties and the husband was a high earning but average looking introvert that she settled for after she was bored of the c.o.c.k carousel. Feel sorry for the guy.
Being single ain't so bad
The best decision!
The path of kings
😂😂😂
With a bunch of kids with already strained finances (or hubby wouldn’t have to work so hard)… uhm… maybe not as much as the fantasy seems.
Where is that cute guy at? I’m available 😂
She doesn't seem to take this seriously at all
She sounds childish pinning a lot on some lust.
Her laughing was seriously making me 😡
She sounds giddy to me, like she's got a serious crush.
Laugh could be nervousness too.
That’s nervous energy. She took ownership immediately in this call.
When she said she would “Drop a hotel card.” I knew she’s cheated already and called in to get some validation. I just knew…
Yes, and once they cheat, often most will get a guilt trip on themselves and then they'll provoke an end to the marriage, and then lay blame to that provocation rather than blame themselves for having sex with someone else. It's a cover for what they did. And they know once they cheat, it's done usually.
Agreed because women typically do not initiate.
you assumed that with no proof
@@conscientunit1157IF YOU OLD ENOUGH AND KNOW HOW RELATIONSHIPS WORK YOU DONT NEED PROOF
Short Answer. It’s not sinful to find other people attractive but to lust after them is a sin.
And any inappropriate actions is wrong.
Amen
Actions and thoughts. First the thoughts entertain the actions, which we would say is lust. Jesus said to just after someone is to commit adultery. Guard your heartb with all diligence, says Proverbs 4, for the rivers of life spring from it.
100%
Yes indeed. King David - a man after God´s own heart - was the great example!
Also: finding other people attractive might not be sinful per se but it might hint that one's mind is not fully fixed to the spouse in Christian marriage.
I've been married 31 years. I would divorce her in a second.
Exactly. Divorce would be far better than being alone while in a marriage, and found disgusting by one's "wife."
@donalgraeme a lot of men today have no pride, self respect or backbone.
Trouble is she would be doing it and you not even know
Imagine her husband finds this video and recognizes her name, voice, and city😬
I hope he does.
I'm praying for it!
Absolutely!!
@@risingsunofjapan someone needs to save him
I hope someone connects the dots and helps this man.
She has zero remorse. She wants an excuse to cheat without being the bad guy
Day ending in Y
maybe the guy is not even into her he may just be all over her because she is the boss
@@hoosier-daddy777 The husband is 100 percent a cliche nice guy with some nerdy hobbies and a reserved personality, that she settled for after being ran through all throughout her twenties. Now she's bored of him and what's a bad boy to sleep with on the side while the high salary earning husband continues to fund her lifestyle. Seen it so many times before it's laughable. It's a broken record at this point. Marrying a woman these days is literally one of the dumbest decisions a man can make in his life.
She's a cake eater.
I don't see what you see.
What I see: She is searching for reasons not to metaphorically "drop a grenade in her own lap", because it it tempting. I'm proud of this woman for calling in.
Don’t cut a tree down in the winter just because it looks dead. Seasons change.
Exactly 💯
love that analogy
She cheated on husband for no reason but calls a radio station for validation for bad behavior, tell your husband before somebody show his this online ,modern woman no accountability but expect no conquenes. Her husband deserve a better wife
100 %
She’s going to hit the wall hard.
Her voice sounds like she already has hit the wall, and very likely the guy she likes does not find her attractive back. She does not sound attractive
Probably already has. Sounds at least 42 years old. The guy she wants to have an affair with is probably average looking and she's deluded into thinking it's Henry Cavill just because he wants to use her for an easy lay when she's past her prime. Seen it way too many times before at this point. People will say it's misogynistic saying this but more than half of woman on this planet just aren't worth it anymore.
I can guarantee Dr. John’s tone would have been completely different if it were a guy calling under the exact same circumstances. If it had been a man, he would have immediately assumed there was more going on in the background probably accusing him of already cheating or worse. Yet in this case, he doesn’t even challenge her when she says the man found her ‘cute’ and would take a hotel key to meet her. How does a work conversation even escalate to someone saying, ‘You’re cute’? How does she know he’d sleep with her if she asked? This has clearly gone far beyond fantasy or speculation, yet none of this was addressed.
Completely agree. He would’ve trashed a male caller that would’ve spoken like her.
i said the same thing bra lol
Completely agree. Very soft.
I agree as well
It's illegal in the West to shame women didn't you know
We don’t see each other and my husband is such a hard worker, working long hours supporting our family, so to show my appreciation I’m going to go have a fling… wow. This lady needs to grow up.
Right ! This is totally how she said it too ! I didn’t hear a single bad thing , not he is addicted to blah blah blah and doesn’t show me time or any of that , she just said he works hard and he is great .. this girl is so dumb if she cheats. Blowing up her life over someone who will turn out to not be perfect ! No one is
@ Exactly! And the way she giggled and laughed over it all.
When did this caller say she was going to have a fling? Acknowledging temptation =\= intention to succumb to temptation. I would say speaking it out loud and getting the reality check to not fan the flames (in your own head) points to an effort to not succumb.
@@Kroh13 Of course she didn't say anything single bad thing about her husband. It's because she's taking accountability for herself. She knows the blame lies with her and not with her husband. This is points in her favor that she's actually trying to do the right thing
Observe, think/reason then speak/do.
Seems like she is not putting/failing to see value in her marriage before speaking.
Unfortunately have seen this before. Additionally seems like people accept the idea of over speaking every thought in their mind, instead of just stop those which are nonsense.
Recognizing physical attractiveness in someone of the opposite sex is a Hell of a lot different from developing infatuation for that individual. No comparison.
Yes, the title of this video doesn't tell the whole story of her intentions very well.
She has already cheated with this guy, she now feels bad, and now she's calling to try and validate herself somehow when she knows she's wrong lol
She is blessed with a good life and family. Someone said yes to doing life with you. Focus on being grateful for what you have rather than what you don't.
If you ever find yourself about to destroy your life to fan some flame, just remember that your relationship with your spouse probably started out the same way. At one time, your heart quickened whenever he called and every touch sent a shiver up your spine. That is how virtually every marriage starts. It’s the launch sequence that gets your relationship off the ground. Eventually, if you allow it to happen, the fireworks mature into something better. Real love that has stood the test of time because it’s based on respect and commitment is very comfortable and sweet. If you dump your spouse to chase the flame and by some miracle it actually turns into a real relationship, just understand that the fireworks you’re feeling right now are on a countdown. That won’t continue, and by the time it dies down, you will have broken your husband’s heart, destroyed the lives of your children, and will probably end up alone anyway. The way this woman is cackling about setting fire to her life like a silly teenage girl doesn’t sound promising. Her poor husband is the victim here.
Bingo
All good in theory, but more than half of all marriages end in divorce so clearly it doesn’t work more than it does work.
100% ✅️
Couldn't have said it better myself 💯
Preach 🙏🔥💯
I feel sorry for the husband. He works hard to provide for his wife and keeps himself in shape … all so that she can flirt with and fantasize about this other dude.
If the husband is insecure about his wife thinking another man might look better than him then maybe he’s the problem.
@@stevendavis5095 That wasn't the issue in this call, but thank you for that strawman.
@@jh26pt2 that’s exactly what you made this call to be about in your comment. Thus I replied to your comment. Insecurity in people especially men is gross no way around it and if a man can’t handle the fact that his wife gf or whatever thinks another man or woman is attractive it speaks to that man’s inability to respect himself and respect his significant other as a person. She’s hasn’t acted in anything it’s all in her mind. Why would anyone try and fight with a fantasy? That’s like tryna box with God. It’s simply a waste of time and energy. Focus on what you can do better. That’s it that’s all
@@stevendavis5095bum
@@stevendavis5095I honestly don't think people think before they type stuff. Look at your response 🤦♂️
This chick is going to ruin her relationship with her husband, kids, family, herself, etc for a one night stand
Don’t be surprised, this is MOST modern women.
@@danielyoung7458you’re hanging around the wrong women if you believe that’s most women.
Absolutely despicable
@@danielyoung7458I'm not part of "modern women"
@@danielyoung7458 And many old-fashioned and modern men.
Her legs are in the air and she doesn’t even know it. I think she’s over her husband and is using this guy as an excuse to get out of it all. Sadly, a lustful desire for someone other than your husband is no laughing matter and should be addressed before an affair is introduced to her family. 😢
It's funny to her. She is who she is.
Hopefully, she'll at least ask for a divorce before she cheats (if she hasn't already).
when someone says “I don’t know if I can trust myself” that’s a serious red flag. They are simultaneously showing a severe lack of self control AND trying to take some if not all of the blame/responsibility off of themself.
not her pouring salt in wound by saying "he's so cute" talking about another man. gross
Yup. She’s enjoying this. Instead of putting energy into her relationship.
Or when she mentioned him looking like a good kisser... Bro what? I thought you were calling in to save your marriage not gush about another man.
I think she’s just being honest so Dr. D. Knows how far this fantasy has already gone. I respect that.
I’m slow, but how do you guys get the emoji thing like that? 👍🏾
You are absolutely right @@gabrielamartiniuc6322
If I heard this from my wife I would not be able to handle it ☠️
The laughing would really hurt me
Absolutely. She thinks this is a joke
If I found this out I’d divorce her. She’s a walking time bomb. If she hasn’t cheated yet she will eventually.
This will be the moment I will lost every interest in her, immediately.
Yeah because she doesn't think her husband deserves her loyalty and respect.
Oh she is going to cheat, she enjoyed this conversation WAY too much. Giggling & laughing the entire time, this is cute & funny to her. She loves thinking about this other guy & has completely immersed herself in the fantasy.
Yep she’s too far gone already.
1000%
Yep, she already has "cheated" in her mind, she just hasn't had the nuts to have the new guy bury everything but his inside her yet. But she is going to continue to have it build up in her mind until she throws herself at the new guy and ends up ruining the "perfect" life she had over 10 mins of some strange d1ck. She won't realize how much this isn't worth it until after she physically cheats and that new guy fling is over and she wakes up 2 years later and the husband has moved on to a better woman who was looking for a good man, a good man she had but threw away. And she probably will spend the rest of her life looking for that again but will never have it. All the memories she would've had w husband and kids will never get to happen, and she'll never forgot the 8 mins with the new guy not because it lived up to the hype but because that experience cost her everything she didn't even realize she had
Validation seeker tendencies fr
Maybe she already cheated.. yea no way around it I bet.
What a kind and understanding and empathetic man Dr John is ❤
Ya know. Being single aint so bad. I needed this.
Catching an attraction spark can happen to anyone.
BUT *don't fuel the fire, extinguish it*
Or you'll burn the whole house down.
💯
Honestly, thats some much BS. If you actually care and work for relationship, theres no opportunity to catch that spark lmao.
@@jakubpolitowski3740 agreed.. anytime I was with someone, it was unconditional love
I love this
@jakubpolitowski3740 such rare. Everyone's lost there honor morals and shame..
Finding other people attractive is normal… saying things like “Trying to stay faithful” and “I’m trying to trust myself not to have affair…” is CRAZY. And she’s saying it while laughing! 🥴
I'm trying to give her the benefit of doubt and say she is laughing because she's nervous. But idk. It sounds like she's already been living in the fantasy for too long to see reality
People would rather cheat than have these conversations and everyone knows it.
She’s emotionally cheating
She is going to cheat. She thinks it’s cute and funny to talk about it
Kudos to the lady for being vurnerable and taking feedback. Great job to the host of the show for being absolutely clear in his explanations. Great job!!
She tried to call and have him say it's ok for her to have an affair. Her mind is set she wants it and wants someone to give her the ok
People are so selfish. It never ceases to amaze me.
I think social media is to blame, it literally promotes narcissism. Do whatever makes you happy, that’s all that matters. Every time I talk to a woman who cheats, there’s a 1,000,000 justifications, almost all of them are bunk.
This woman is insufferable. Hope the guy finds out and ends up with someone much better. She's a disgrace.
The giggling and the fact that she knows if she lit up the “Hot Now” sign he would show up feels much more like a prelude to action than addressing how to move forward and manage these feelings. If I were the husband and heard this call, I’d likely be out because I don’t hear any concern or regrets, she seems to be enjoying this way too much.
I think she already did it.
fully agree! I felt sick for the husband, listening to her lack of empathy
Wise words for men "stay single and improve yourself"
Sounds like she's getting off talking about herself with John
1000%
She’s already lost the main battle… the battle ground in her heart.
That ground can be regained and I think is through this call.
It’s not her heart it’s her ego
@@cmnhl1329 if we act like she has already cheated physically and condemn her for that, she’ll never know the power of forgiveness or the value of catching herself before any deeper, less retractable harm is done. I think this call says the most about her character - that she’d rather stop herself from sinking to sin like this than risk living with it one more day. I pray she find the support and grace she needs to take courage into the next chapter of her life she will need.
@@brightpage1020 Amen. We pray Jesus will restore her heart for Him and her husband.
@ amen thank you 🙏 We are each of us born to sin - not many have this much courage to call ourselves out publicly for our transgressions so who am I to judge? I see her trying to do the right thing and struggling. And reaching for help and getting it. I see wisdom in her and therefore hope for her marriage.
This is why we need to keep our thoughts captive Once you start thinking about an affair thats the beginning People dont just fall into each other
you shouldn't have to "try" to stay faithful ....
The fact that she KNOWS this other guy finds her attractive means they've had some sort of conversation about it, which to me is already being unfaithful... This very much seems like she's already having an emotional affair and I'm kind of surprise that was never mentioned. Hopefully she realizes this is *her problem and she needs to get her focus back on her marriage and family and move on from this fling and put in the work with the man she chose to live her forever with.
@Michelle-gg7hn I agree. Dr. John should have drilled deeper to find out how far this has gone. From what we were told it is very likely that she has been and is currently having an emotional affair with this man, and to the extent that has happened she has been cheating in a sense already. Kudos to you as a woman for looking at the other side of the equation and considering what this woman is doing to her husband already
Exactly - beyond me how this wasn’t called out.
They've probably been sexting each other with pics!.
She’s already made her mind up, she’s too comfortable talking about wanting to do it and how “she’s so afraid “ of taking the next step bc she doesn’t “trust herself”.
This call was her proving (to herself? Or her husband? Idk) that she tried not to.. that she made an effort to get advice.. before doing what she’s going to do regardless.
She’s made the decision & she’s made peace with it.
Her giggling and entire demeanour screams excitement. She’s almost giddy talking about it.
She doesn’t sound torn or guilty at all..
This lady is absolutely going to cheat. 💯 😂
Like almost all of you. Nothing new. Men should never get married or be in a serious relationship with any of you.
She doesn't realize, usually the guy she cheats with doesn't want to have a life with her, he just wants to diddly-do, and then he's on to the next one! and she will feel discarded and betrayed.. or.. she'll find the next "cute" guy..
@@TrustintheUniverse1111 100%
Usually they seek married women bc of that, it’s a sure thing that won’t lead anywhere or have any expectations of him.
You’re right on the money! Especially the part about making herself feel good about having “sought advice”.
Agree
I feel bad for her children and her husband some people are very selfish
Yes
Dr John is firing on all cylinders in this back and forth.. he’s putting on a true clinic. So happy I found this guy a few weeks back.
There are two sides of the internet. One trying to talk sense in to this woman to keep her from ruining lives, and the other telling her to be free and empower herself to do whatever makes her feel good.
It’s funny, I listen, I get triggered…. And then I realize the bliss of being single and not having to waste my life with someone like this. True peace.
Because no one likes you. Get real.
Why the hell would you get triggered? Is this your wife?
@@firefly9838😂
The bliss of your gene pool dying off. Must be cool.
@ It is the exact move and logic of my ex wife.
Misleading title. She’s literally planning out how to initiate an affair.
She even mentions THROWING him a hotel key card. She’d be better off paying for it in Nevada.
Yep
1000%
And Deloney is downplaying it as if she isn’t totally willing to let this man inside of her. She is only worried about being caught.
I try so hard not to be too judgmental of people I don't personally know, but damn this woman just irritates me SO MUCH. The entitlement, the giggling, the whole attitude... yugh.
Same here. I’m always defending callers but yeah this one was difficult for sure
She's the kind of woman you wish didn't reproduce. She doesn't deserve to be a Mom.
I thought it was just me. I'll bet money I don't even have yet she'll be having a full-blown affair soon. She doesn't really sound like she's wanting to be talked OUT of it, to be honest. 🤷🏻♀️
She’s trash
Yup
Devastating to have your partner need to be convinced not to cheat on you 😳
It's madness😂
Crazy how she said her hushand is the fit and attractive one in the relationship lol
She knows he gets attention so she’s desperate for it too.
Sometimes I can’t take these callers and have to stop listening
Same it’s hard to listen to
Same. So many people today are so damn insufferable. It's enough to make you want the whole world to just spontaneously explode.
This husband is in for a brutal divorce.
She obviously does not care AT ALL.
Only concerned about how she’s going to look to everyone else.
I think many married people become attracted to other people at one time or another… it’s how you act and what you do with that. She said herself that she was enjoying the fantasy of who he might be, etc…. A lot of the time, it’s the attention and the fact that a new person is looking again that gets people caught up. In the end, it’s best to keep yourself focused on your marriage and why you love your partner. This is how affairs happen if people get carried away.
she's laughing about it and fantasizing ON AIR about how this person would be in bed. She will cheat if she hasn't already.
Lol..she's definitely gonna cheat! Wake up!
yea, i think its not ok to fantasize because adultery in the heart is still adultery but also the reason i think that holds true is that fantasy’s are often what lead to actions, but it still happens to the best of us because thats just human nature but in the end were always given a choice weather to act on temptation or repent and work to be a better person.
It’s wild to me that people are so internally damaged. I have been in situations with women I found attractive and the only thoughts I have in my mind are of how much damage I would do to my family by choosing this selfishness and that’s all I need to want no part of it, well that and my integrity.
I’ve had several women over the years that were a little too touchy with me to be a professional environment. Had she not been married I’d think she was flirting. But I just passed it off as her being friendly
John that was really good advice!! She anit doing none of this..
To me the most telling part is how resistant she is when he provides ideas to bring a spark to her own marriage. He suggests Dirty texts and surprises to get that spark. She just laughs it off. The truth is this goes beyond attraction and borderlines on obsession. I know he didn't say this cause he was more focused on triage. But the fact is being attracted to someone is normal.Obsessing over a fantasy with someone is NOT normal. She is already emotionally cheating even if the other guy isn't involved. Also listen to the way she floats off her Husband's contributions to the family. It's pretty obvious she has no respect for him. That's the other way you know cheating is on the horizon. She sees.
Her contributions as this overwhelming burden and he is as just a matter of course, In her eyes he's doing what is required of him at the bare minimum and she is doing him a favor by working hard. She feels.
She should be rewarded for that in on some level. She thinks the rewards should be this fantasy. At no point does she think about her husband's rewards or what he deserves. The fact that she has a very focused self serving point of view, As long as she focuses on herself and her wants cheating will be inevitable
Starts off with “I’m trying to be faithful…..”
Dr. Delony should have told her that her husband can probably do better than her. Heck, even staying single is WAY better than being married to someone like this.
He talks down to the men but never to the women that call his show
Sounds to me, her husband needs to find a new wife.
Nope don’t get married period
@@BrianWaller-qe7gr I'm sorry for whatever happened to you. I understand bro. This is what happens when we marry the wrong people God didn't intend for us
He needs to start protecting his assets, divorce and stay away from "marriage"
She's already cheated
100% she's already emotionally cheating. This would damage the husband tremendously if she was transparent with him, but she's not. She's a selfish self absorbed woman child.
Facts buddy tappin rn
When she said she would "drop a hotel card", you know she's done it before.
I should have thought this. I honestly don't know why I don't assume this already.
@@fignewtoneaterbecause youre( me too a bit) a bit naive and too trusting of what this person is saying.
I would hate for this to be my wife but so glad she called in to a man with logic and not a woman host
If this is her thoughts, your best off letting her go , ain't no fixing that attitude!
Thanks for this Dr John.
As a husband who has missed it when I was first dating my wife.. I needed to hear this.
She is gonna cheat lol
100%
And her husband probably knows it. Disgusting.
she literally said she's sick and tired of the daily routine of marriage and family life. She's not only gonna cheat, but if she were younger and beautiful, she'd be a flight risk. She would leave it all if there were a man who would adopt her.
Yeah this marriage is cooked
No. She wouldn’t call asking for advice.
Self control is a gift of the Holy Spirit. She needs God.
only way
100%
Shes in Salt Lake City so shes probably Mormon which means it is unlikely she will come to Christ.
@@bobbabb no more unlikely than anyone else. It's always a work of the Holy Spirit.
@@plousia Statistically it is more unlikely than a secular person, since worshipping a false God is further from God than refusing to worship anything.
Though I could be and hope that I am wrong. I will pray for her.
“She’s not yours, it’s just your turn.” This is the type of woman that applies to. 😂 🤦🏻
May God bless you for the solid advice you gave this lady and may He keep her's and every one else's marriages safe.
She didn’t call to fix her marriage. That relationship is over.😢
Why is this so hard for people.... "it's so hard to not get the hotel room and have an affair"... No, it's bloody easy to not book a hotel, certainly easier to no book than it is to book.
Not that I'm condoning their actions... but they're sway by their emotions. I have ex-friends who cheated on their partners because they become infatuated easily, which then guides them to affairs. They definitely need a lot of self work because they expect others to complete them.
Righhhttt! Its Also not easy to set up a time to meet at the hotel and figure out when it would be possible to "hook up"...this call blew my mind
Us men have emotions too. It's a fortune thing that men do not act out intrusive thoughts, or it would be a more dangerous world.
She has a healthy sexual appetite. Her husband doesn’t. She is not satisfied.
@@mg8459mg almost everyone is susceptible to this, it's not because some people are "more emotionally swayed" than others - it's because they lack self-control. Affairs don't happen in a day, they brew over time because of a series of bad decisions until feelings become too difficult to control.
For example: a married man may have a conversation with an attractive coworker, and she starts flirting with him. Anyone would feel some excitement from this, but a faithful man changes the subject or leaves. The future cheater entertains the conversation and tells themselves "I won't let this go any further than that". But that excitement is like a drug. Maybe you'll only use it once, but chances are you'll try it again and want more and more of it. If you want to stay faithful, you have to shut down anything that could lead to an affair.
When I clicked, I wanted to appreciate the woman calling for admitting something hard.
But to get away talk about another man. To have zero shame in your voice to the point of giggling and laughter talking about the idea of cheating on your devoted husband.
Then you want to turn around and cry that he's at work a lot? She did a pretty good job of manipulating in this call.
I wish John had been more harsh
He never will.
@ Women pay Johns bills. He will never hold them accountable
If it has been a guy calling he would have been harsh.
He won’t, his audience is mostly females. Historically, he always goes light on females and very hard on males..
John a puss.
How would SHE feel if it was the other way around? Her husband being attracted to another woman because she is just not lighting up his world. Sexuality really messes with a persons head. The "growing up" process doesn't stop when we turn 18. And we make many mistakes. She sounds like she's trying to deal with them but may anyway cause a "car wreck". There are no guarantees in the outcome. Not even that the "other guy" would/could reciprocate.
Dr. John, I think you handled this call very well. I think without realizing it I have a similar approach when I give advice but didn't notice it until I heard you do it... you acknowledge their feelings are real, their fantasy is real, and it's not crazy. Then you try to bring them back to the reality of it all and point out it's fantasy. I sure hope this woman listened. Many don't fully grasp what you're telling them and can't squash the fantasy. Of she cheats she'll regret it, call back in, and still not take your advice.
Women are all about the 'feels' guys, be smart , always pay attention, never make her feel that she has got you for granted... Be a bit flirtuous (not disrespectful ) with other women in front of her sometimes, make her feel a bit jealous sometimes, and loved and reassured most of the time, the roller coaster of 'feels' is key to keep her always desiring you and likely faithful.
The question arises, why do men care? Women aren't caring about men having to be sexually satisfied and enticed, they are always fine with remaining sexless, laying like a fish on the bed, absolutely zero positive reinforcement yet we are supposed to be their personal jesters just so we aren't cheated on? Women don't have that problem since they get rewarded for divorces anyways.
I feel so bad for her nice-guy husband. He will soon be presented with divorce papers and have to pay half of his retirement plan to the caller, owe years of alimony & child support, be lucky to see his broken kids every other weekend, sell the house to pay equity to the cheater & move into an apartment next to rowdy neighbors, and work until at least 70+ if he lives that long. The caller's new studs will have more influence on the children than the father will. It's a sad story that keeps playing out because cheating wives get rewarded for their bad behavior.
Exactly. The laws in the US are Evil and on top of that, Women have been programmed to destroy families, a perfect recipe for the compete destruction of the nuclear family.
It's 100 percent time for us men to take the system back and start over.
Oh the life of this husband. Work super hard to build a life for your family and then your wife gets lonely because your not around so then she starts thinking about cheating and then you have to stop working out ( which is probably how you stay mentally healthy as well as physically) so that you can do even more work that she doesn't want to do so that she doesn't leave you and take half of everything you worked so hard for.
Sounds like the dude shoukd have picked a better wife, .but i guess not everyone can be as blessed as me, thank you lord for what youve given me.
80-90% of the time on these shows it seems women have a hard time with loyalty.
Those are the calls that get clicks, so those are the calls they put through. It might not be representative of the real world, but it is representative of what viewers want.
90 % of them
Brother imagine being a gender where you've grown up learning that you were soo soo oppressed by men. Men did this or that to you. And you take that victimisation to heart even if you didn't face it, have abundance of options from tinder to bumble, having not to life a finger to get a date or a hookup, ofcourse it is easier to cheat. Men really don't matter since the power dynamics in dating have always been in women's advantage. Read about what women like to read as erotica and you'll see their true nature. We catch the dust too often just because our fantasies are more visual and straightforward. But women read or consume smut of whole another level.
@@dustinpetersen7730Keep being delusional and don't accept reality..
I always found that fascinating, how people talk about marriage being a lot of hard work. I already have a job, why would I want another one when I get home?
“I’m trying to stay faithful to my husband”
That tells me what I need to know. You don’t have to “try” you are either a faithful person or you are not.
I don't think that's true. Faithfulness, like any virtue, takes effort. Giving in to our desires is the easy path.
@@evanl889 I disagree. there's a reason fidelity is considered a virtue - everyone is tempted, only some are strong/wise enough to resist it.
I just don't think she's really trying because she continuing to flirt and entertain a fantasy with this guy.
Exactly. You don’t need to try to be faithful, you just need to remain faithful which means creating healthy defensive habits that don’t put your relationship in harms way and protect your partner. This means if someone at work feels they can tell you that you are cute, you have not put this in place. Married people that want to stay married are not approachable, period.
Actually life's not entirely black and white. Maybe you should think about that before you say something that makes you sound like a moron who's incapable of nuanced thought.
@@pedrosttauthank you for actually being intelligent 👍🏾
Marriage takes work on both ends. Dates, breaks from work, active listening, encouraging each other's dreams, putting effort into yourself and yes also showing restraint when temptation comes.
The nicer you treat a woman the more likely she is going to cheat.
@@herjitpannu2282 bingo
Modern women don’t deserve commitment. Across the board, womens lib did what it was aimed to do. Rid men of the women like the one in this video
Her playful attitude tells me she doesn't want to have an affair because of the consequences of what she may lose. Not because of wanting to fulfill her covenant of marriage by being faithful.
Lol..ok
Uh yeah millions of men and women are in that position... need the ability of a partner but don't necessarily like them that much.
Calling and asking for this, is already too much for me!!!!!!
He broke this down amazingly
Also, the other guy is not a good guy. He knows what he's doing and willing to sleep with a married woman not caring about the consequences of destroying a family.
Maybe he’s married too??
Men dont care though hes gonna think, well shes gonna smash someone else with or without me.
Since when badboys care!
The other guy is doing her husband a favour. It just shows him who his woman is. A real wife wouldn’t even entertain the thought of cheating
I came for the comments!
Yeah me too! and they are pretty Judgemental the people....nobody is perfect but all these people commenting seem to be....
*passes a pitch fork*
derp
And the caller damn near came on the call when talking about the other guy. Lol...what a devil
This woman does not care. She's 100% going to do it, if she hasn't already.
It’s perfectly normal to find other people attractive when married. It’s not ok when you act on those feelings
Can't agree more with the statement @9:20. "The moment your husband gets a shield on and a sword out to go to war for the family, that's when you think "I'm gonna go bang the neighbor"."
I was only in the Army for 4 years, but I've been through it personally and seen it happen an alarming amount of times. It's difficult not to be pessimistic about the world and relationships in general.
so she has everything , a good husband hard working , kids and yet she is not happy ??? women.........
I’ve been dealing with this kind of thing professionally for over 30 years. I’ve seen a lot of things. This woman has already cheated with this guy or will very soon. Often, people go to counseling looking for validation for what they have already decided to do. And with due respect for John, he is 110 wrong. There is absolutely NOTHING NORMAL .about being infatuated with someone when you’re married or in a relationship. None!! The two are mutually exclusive. If you or your partner is infatuated with someone else, your relationship is in serious trouble and you would do well to fix the problem,
Right on!
Bingo! I've heard him say plenty of times that having a crush is okay as long as you don't act on it and its of course utter bullshit. If my husband told me he had a crush on someone I would organise divorce papers ASAP.
Absolutely. John and I have drastically different moral compasses. But I can’t believe he would be ok with his wife being infatuated with someone else. 🤔
And having listened again, he openly stated that “many affairs happen in really good marriages.” I can’t wrap my head around a man in his business and my own saying something like that! I’m wondering if he might be revealing a part of his own moral compass??
@@gregorycarlson6632Maybe he knows more than you because it's his job to counsel people, ever think of that?
Dr. John did his best. All we can do is hope he got through.
Props to this woman for calling in and for getting help. Also great job John nailing down what the problem is. Sounds like she needs to have a tough talk with her husband, but at least she can have an informed discussion of exactly what is bothering her. Hope they get it figured out!
It is was husband saying, all hell would break...
You have a choice.
I can totally understand finding someone attractive in a marriage, BUT DON'T validate feelings of having a crush. A crush is major different. She might even be past crush. Please just leave him. Or see this, my guy. She is probably going to do this. RUN!!!
How old did they say she was? She's sounding like a child who doesn't want to be an adult.
A crush is just the absence of information. Credit to @ashleyduckworthyt3224 for this statement because it’s so true.
Crushes are just fantasies.
@@hoawbunter Been married for 14 years, so however old she is she's old enough to know better
There’s nothing understandable about finding someone attractive when you’re in a relationship or married.
@codedsoul7360 It is perfectly understandable and normal to find another person attractive.
Attraction is what initially draws us to another person. And usually that attractive quality is something that is easily visible. Spending time with that person, discovering who they are, what they value etc will then help us to decide whether or not the person is a worthy partner or spouse.
It is one thing for a spouse to find someone other than their spouse attractive. That is not offensive. What is offensive is when the spouse chooses to pursue someone they find attractive, to flirt with, fantasise and lust after them. By doing so they are choosing not to love their spouse.
There is more than one person on this earth that could be a worthy spouse to us. However, when we choose a spouse and enter into a committed relationship, we make the choice to love, honour and respect our spouse and marriage relationship and not pursue others. Finding someone attractive who is not our spouse is not a sin. Making the choice to act on that attraction is the sin.The word 'love' is a verb. We choose to love our spouses via our behaviour and words. We do not love our spouse via our feelings. We feel loved or not loved because of the actions of our spouse.
Hollywood has deceived many women by portraying love as solely feeling based and creating a narrative of 'the one and only' or 'my soulmate'.
There’s a HUGE difference between finding someone attractive and being attracted to someone. I’m happily newly married to my amazing and gorgeous wife, and find PLENTY of other women attractive. There’s not a cell in my body that is attracted TO anyone else. Ana De Armas and Margot Robbie are out of this world attractive, hell so are Ryan Gosling and Ryan Reynolds. Finding others attractive is human nature and there’s nothing remotely wrong with it, being attracted to someone else is a whole different thing
Interesting comment. What is the difference between finding others attractive and being attracted to others in your opinion?
@@angelicaangel2624knowing someone is good looking and charming VS wanting them and wanting to be with them (like this lady who is fantasizing a scenario she KNOWS can happen in real life- he’s not just a cute guy, she WANTS him.)
That is correct. However I don't think being attracted to someone is a choice. There are plenty of men I find attractive and a small number of men I am attracted to. Neither of those things is a choice
@@angelicaangel2624 exactly what some others said. It’s simply acknowledged other peoples good looks or charm or whatever it is. Making a simple observation of “wow she’s attractive” and then moving on is a completely different thing than “wow that person is good looking and I want to have a relationship of some kind with them”
MayBlake:As long as both you and the guy are single, no problem.
Now I see why some people won't get married or even date. If you're looking for trouble, you're going to find it! I could not imagine doing this to my spouse. Even when I'm mad at him I've never wanted anyone else. My spouse is my home. When he's working long hours I get sad because I don't see him. I could never imagine trying to jump someone else's bones. Truly disgusting.
You’re a great woman and an even greater wife 😊
If this is actually true, then thank you for being a good person. Less and less of those every day.
First time I've watched your podcast I'm hooked keep up the good work
How would she like it if her husband went on the radio fawning over some other woman?
Divorce her
She cheated after the call was over
Wow, everyone contemplating an affair should listen to this episode!
Loved how the host didn’t just shame her and actually walked through things instead of the comment section who just judged. We wonder why people don’t have anyone to talk to.
Lol, she's clearly going to do it anyway.
@@theeggreat4maybe the giggling came off as her feeling no guilt about the matter and she sure did enjoy the attention, however if she's truly not engaging and not acting on it, a fantasy is just a fantasy. Sometimes fantasies help people get through tough times Idk.
@@theeggreat4women should be shamed. This idea that shaming doesn't work is how we get the degenerate society we live in.