Planet Earth but for Karens, Chads, and Dads

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  • Опубліковано 27 вер 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 516

  • @selohcin
    @selohcin Рік тому +1295

    This isn't satire; It's an actual documentary.

  • @visual_safety
    @visual_safety Рік тому +3418

    This is the best documentary I have ever seen. National Geographic should hire you.

  • @shaine1212
    @shaine1212 Рік тому +786

    the Karen cries without tears and roll on the floor for help, their defensive mechanism when things gone wrong for them

    • @Lazycaty
      @Lazycaty Рік тому +2

      Bruh lol 69 nobody like this anymore

    • @mrbigsta4221
      @mrbigsta4221 Рік тому +2

      @Georgia Sachs okay few things:
      69 is a sex joke, and usually sex jokes are used in ages 12-14.
      You spelled “you” and “are” as “u” & “r”, which is usually a sign of young age in my opinion, as most people I’ve met using such things are young children.
      Please, if you’re complaining, keep it to yourself.

    • @FunBotSprunki
      @FunBotSprunki Рік тому +1

      ​@@mrbigsta4221 wait can you tell me how 69 is a sex joke bc i thought it was only a hah funni number

    • @Sentryunit582
      @Sentryunit582 Рік тому +1

      @Stinger flynn oh go you’re too innocent

    • @MarioMoss69
      @MarioMoss69 Рік тому

      ​@@FunBotSprunki look it up when its time

  • @tails5784
    @tails5784 Рік тому +2021

    This is the first time in my life I've watched a documentary and actually enjoyed it

  • @NebsGMD_
    @NebsGMD_ Рік тому +416

    Imagine that this is how aliens make a documentary about us

  • @AFM515
    @AFM515 Рік тому +78

    The Emilia TheyThemus. Absolute gold 😂

    • @ShamuAccident
      @ShamuAccident 24 дні тому +1

      ...will also turn into a Karen 😅

  • @mahaboobajaffar4836
    @mahaboobajaffar4836 Рік тому +190

    The fact thaat they came up with all these names. Super creative. 10 outta 10.👍😀

  • @larisachan1787
    @larisachan1787 Рік тому +36

    I lost it when said " Supervisaurus"
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @axyspianostudio
    @axyspianostudio Рік тому +33

    "one man's feast, is another man's famine"

  • @dragonweyr44
    @dragonweyr44 Рік тому +114

    The karens battle cry is I want to talk to your manager or I know/am friends with/am married to the owner/manager
    The karen thinks that everyone in a a store, in the parking lot of a store or in the vicinity of a store, is an employee of that store whether they wear the store's uniform or not and their only function in life is to serve them, alone, hand and foot
    I wrote an entire list titled How To Spot A Wild Karen with over 30 examples if you want to see it

    • @d.leighannbatemon3192
      @d.leighannbatemon3192 Рік тому +9

      How might one see this list? I feel it would provide entertainment 😂

    • @dragonweyr44
      @dragonweyr44 Рік тому

      @@d.leighannbatemon3192 Years and years ago, a comic by the name of Jeff Foxworthy really made his name by making a list entitled "You Might Be a Redneck If" jokes
      Here is my list that I'm going to call "You Might be A Karen/Ken/Kevin If."
      You might be a Karen if,
      1. Your battle cry/mating call is "I want to speak to your manager/owner!"
      2. You think that you are always right, especially if you sometimes think that you may be wrong,
      ESPECIALLY if you KNOW that you're wrong. Even when they're being led away in handcuffs and sentenced to 5 years in jail or more, They're still right.
      3. You think that your children are precious little angels who can do no wrong, while ignoring the fact that they're actually demon spawn who destroy everything they touch.
      4. A Karen thinks that everything you want should be, if not free, at a hugely discounted price, whether it's on sale or not.
      5. No one, and I mean NO ONE is as important as you are. If you are the last one in line for something, you won't be for long.
      6. If you or one of the hellspawn that you call a family want something, even if obviously belongs to someone else, it is YOURS. and you should give it to them because either you or your parasites deserve it more than you, the owner of that item, does. They can't conceive of the idea that 'if my child wants said item so much, why don't I buy them one instead?'
      7. If things don't go their way and they know it, a Karen will ALWAYS either play either the "rape/molesting" card, fake an injury or call you a pervert or worse if they have their crotch goblins nearby. And if you are an extreme Karen, you'll start throwing a tantrum like a toddler.
      8. Karens would make excellent football/soccer players. If things don't go her way, they always do a "flop" and claim injury when they don't.
      9. If someone else has something that you or your hellions don't have, or if it is something nicer than what you have you will do one of the following
      A. Buy something or try to make your partner buy something similar to your item that is significantly more valuable than the item you have (and usually much gaudier than yours) even if you can't afford it to show off.
      B. Try to steal the item because "You don't deserve it and I/my little angel does."
      C. Attempts to steal your item, fails and then claims to anyone and everyone around that it was hers/her child's and he or she (you) stole it from them.
      10. If a Karen wants something that they can't physically take, such as a neighbors swimming pool, even if there is a fence present, they will break onto your property and use it without permission because "My babies are hot and need to swim" or some similar excuse for any other item
      11. Karen's are completely ignorant about things like No Trespassing, Private Property, Do Not Enter, Reserved Parking, Handicapped Parking etc. except when applies to their OWN property
      12. A Karen will always leech off of others, especially family but wouldn't lift a finger to help others unless they HAD to and then, only reluctantly.
      13. As a whole, a Karen is not that smart in social situations, if it doesn't benefit them or their own, it is of no importance to them to care.
      14. Another of a Karen's favorite ways of getting something for free, "But we're family and you can afford it."
      15. In the event a Karen hates her children, she'll only keep them around for purposes of power or child support.
      16. Most Karen's forget that surveillance cameras exist until pointed out.
      17. In the presence of a manager or police officer, or anyone who may be expected to take sides, a Karen always makes herself heard first and loudest.
      Their thinking, speaking over someone else loudly makes what they say more believable.
      18. To a Karen, employees below manager status do not deserve respect, consideration or time unless it is to wait on them hand and foot.
      19. If you give a Karen something, she may complain that you didn't do it to her standards or expectations.
      20. A Karen has to have her nose in EVERYBODY else's business, but NO ONE can know about hers.
      21. A Karen always love to gossip but doesn't understand that there might be other people outside her circle who might hear it and use it against her.
      22. A Karen's core belief, "What's mine is mine and what's yours SHOULD be mine because I deserve it more than you do."
      23. A prejudiced Karen will be quick to make others aware of that if given the opportunity.
      24. If a Karen does value your efforts or contributions, or at least claims to value them, that appreciation tends to go away as soon as you insist on payment or repayment.
      25. If a Karen is a military spouse, she is guaranteed to try and wear her husband's rank as if it were her own. Not just military spouses, if the husband has ANY kind of rank i.e., boss or VP of a company, mayor, governor, senator, etc. they feel that they have that same rank in life as well, and the higher the position, the more entitled they are.
      26. A Karen either is, is the spouse of, or is best friend of the owner/manager of any business they enter until they find out they have been talking to the owner/manager. spouse of the owner/manager or the child of the owner/manager.
      27. A Karen will hold a grudge against others till the end of time, but in the event that you have a grievance against her, Karen will claim whatever you are upset about is 'in the past' and therefore irrelevant.
      28. To a Karen, everyone in any given store is an employee specifically put on Earth to serve her.
      It doesn't matter if you don't work there. It doesn't matter if you aren't wearing the store's uniform (if they have one), It doesn't matter if you DO work there but are off the clock and now are shopping in that store. YOU ARE AN EMPLOYEE and your purpose in life it to serve her hand and foot.
      And if you say no for any of the above reasons, The Karen will cry her battle cry/mating call (See number 1)
      29. Many, but not all Karens are racist, homophobic, xenophobic and any other phobia you can think of that most people think are offensive.
      30. Karens don't understand adult/sibling-child relationships outside of their own family. If in a park or a store or a place of entertainment like a fair or arcade, a Karen will see anyone with a large age gap between two people and immediately see "Pedophile" and try to "rescue" the child from them.
      31. If a Karen sees an empty handicapped parking space, they will take it for themselves
      32. If a Karen sees someone in a handicapped parking space that doesn't "look" handicapped, they become social justice warriors and call the police. Ignoring handicapped placards and licenses plates.
      I'm always wanting to expand my list so if anyone knows new examples, PLEASE let me know.

    • @averagetheatrefan
      @averagetheatrefan Рік тому +2

      I want to see it pls

    • @dragonweyr44
      @dragonweyr44 Рік тому +10

      @@d.leighannbatemon3192 33. Karens, as a rule can't understand anyone having a physical disability that isn't COMPLETELY obvious such as missing limbs. If a person is blind or deaf, if someone has food allergies, if someone is in a wheelchair or a mobility scooter, they think that they're faking it and will ALWAYS try to prove that they're faking it.
      If they're blind and/or have a guide dog, they'll break their cane or steal their dog, their children will want to either pet or try to steal their dog because their hellspawn want their dog.
      If they're deaf and in a store, they'll think that they're faking it to get out of helping them (see rule 28) even if they aren't in uniform.
      If they're in a wheelchair or mobility scooter they'll try to force you out of it because the karen will think you're being lazy. If this person is in a store, amusement park, a zoo or some other outdoor event, they'll want to force you out of the chair because "I/my child is tired and wants to use it now."
      If you have a food allergy, they'll try to force you to eat whatever you are allergic to because "You're faking it" even if their victim is being hauled off in an ambulance.
      A karen can't understand physical disabilities that are not "in your face" obvious like missing limbs because since the karen doesn't have a disability, no one else has one.
      34. People with disabilities MUST look miserable at all times because, in their eyes, "You look too happy to be disabled."
      35. A karen will defend themselves and their children to the death, no matter what crime they commit because "they have a right to steal from you."
      36. All karens "know the law," and "know the police" and "will see to it that you are arrested and sent to jail" for trying to defend yourself and family from their crimes. The karen can do no wrong, even as they're being hauled off by the police.
      37. Karens belonging to an HOA will always either try to be president of the HOA OR, if they aren't part of the board, will claim to be not to help the neighborhood, but to abuse any perceived authority they have by, but not limited to
      Levying fines on homeowners
      Towing "ugly" cars, usually the owners prized classic cars.
      Forcing neighbors who are NOT part of the HOA to join or trying to force the non-HOA member off their land to claim their land illegally.
      Sell off the non-HOA member's land while they aren't around illegally.
      Poisoning non-HOA farmers animals so that they will be forced to sell.
      Burning down their property if they can, sometimes, if the owner is in the house at the time.
      Claiming a neighbor's pool is theirs (see rule 10)

    • @dragonweyr44
      @dragonweyr44 Рік тому +3

      @@averagetheatrefan I've posted it here already

  • @aferraro92
    @aferraro92 2 місяці тому +10

    Lost it at the HOA bit. These guys are too talented 😂

  • @RodneyKimbangu
    @RodneyKimbangu Рік тому +27

    The stereotypical jungle score makes this even more interesting.

  • @minusculegremlin
    @minusculegremlin Рік тому +21

    this is the best David Attenborough impression ever.

  • @pameclipse
    @pameclipse Рік тому +33

    imagine if this was the only proof that humans exist

  • @Bluegamingishere
    @Bluegamingishere Рік тому +9

    This is how aliens would probably show us as and explain us as after they take over earth

  • @icingcake
    @icingcake Рік тому +155

    Yikes - the dude looks pretty good in the blonde wig 😂

    • @content_machine
      @content_machine  Рік тому +66

      😏😏😏

    • @MrSomsoc
      @MrSomsoc Рік тому +17

      @@content_machine thank you very much for compiling the human documentary!
      Do more whenever you can 💪🏻

    • @appleoneill5135
      @appleoneill5135 Рік тому +5

      I've been thinking the same! He looks hot as hell 😍

    • @icingcake
      @icingcake Рік тому +2

      @@appleoneill5135 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @TRWFacty
      @TRWFacty Рік тому

      Woah woah woah 😨

  • @subaruford3344
    @subaruford3344 6 місяців тому +4

    This is the greatest and most depressing documentary I have ever seen

  • @sipradipmahapatra2496
    @sipradipmahapatra2496 Рік тому +34

    Undoubtedly this is the most enjoyable documentary I have ever seen 😅😅😅😅😅

  • @TaLeng2023
    @TaLeng2023 Місяць тому +1

    Humanity has really came a long way from its Pervatasaurus leeri ancestors.

  • @shahmeer2639
    @shahmeer2639 Рік тому +51

    if dinosaurs were people be like:

  • @Fylasfrommabi
    @Fylasfrommabi Рік тому +13

    OMG YOU ACTUALLY PUT EM TOGETHER? THANK YOU!!!

  • @_average_person
    @_average_person Рік тому +15

    All the Karens are calling the manager on this one😂😂

  • @apm3694
    @apm3694 Рік тому +13

    This is the human equivalent of national geographic

  • @lucycarola
    @lucycarola 2 місяці тому +2

    I know for sure, that this UA-cam channel is going to be the biggest one we’ve had so far. ❤ Rooting for you guys! I come to this channel when I’m in need for a healthy laugh.😂😊

  • @человек-ц2о4б
    @человек-ц2о4б Рік тому +4

    North american karen looks and acts pretty similiar to Eurasian karen, there are lots subspecies in Eurasia, some of them has its own taxtics of hunt, for example Yajmatus Slavicus, also known as Yajmat', these beautiful creatures use their young to hunt their prey, their name translates from slavic languages as "im a mother", they are very agressive, hunt mostly for small prey, but stronger ones can also hunt for managers, they are mostly found in european part of Russia and other slavic countries, sometimes they migrate, and it's very dangerous, because Yajmatus Slavicus can be invasive and they multiply very fast, wild nature of Karens is beautiful

  • @kelvinebima9571
    @kelvinebima9571 Місяць тому +1

    This needs to be a full series…Please we need it!!!😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣

  • @anaghaudupa9545
    @anaghaudupa9545 8 місяців тому +5

    Husbandus flaciddus... I can't!!! 😂😂😂

  • @clauaome25
    @clauaome25 Рік тому +5

    "today his heart is big" ❤

  • @WildStream36
    @WildStream36 11 місяців тому +5

    Man, that Karen is ripped.

  • @maryj7423
    @maryj7423 Рік тому +2

    What is this masterpiece. Perfect script and voiceover. The ancient latin names work so great and the social critique is so witty and accurate. I hope this goes viral, I laughed so hard the whole time😂😂😂

  • @albertkwan4261
    @albertkwan4261 Рік тому +5

    This voice over guy is humanity last hope.

  • @BasilsGardenofFlowers
    @BasilsGardenofFlowers Рік тому +4

    “Her gluteus maximus” got me😂😂😂

  • @guardmommad5084
    @guardmommad5084 Місяць тому +1

    This doc is pure gold!

  • @Veronica.A.
    @Veronica.A. 2 місяці тому +1

    One of the best Nat Geo documentary😂

  • @Im_basically_an_Npc
    @Im_basically_an_Npc 4 місяці тому +1

    Dude, it takes a lot of heckin work to write and perform something this funny, thanks for the laughs man, all love❤
    -Skibidi sigma ohio baby gronk

  • @donovan1082
    @donovan1082 Рік тому +5

    We need more of this

  • @rohit_banga
    @rohit_banga Місяць тому +1

    This will become one of my all time favorite sketches ! I am dying laughing...

  • @d.b.hemlock
    @d.b.hemlock Рік тому +3

    10,000 years from now these will be the official historical documents...

  • @PandorasBox2
    @PandorasBox2 Рік тому +1

    100 times more accurate documentary than Netflix Cleopatra they should hire u

  • @goulartclan
    @goulartclan 5 днів тому

    Monty Python's Life of Brian vibes all over! Work (and references) well done guys!

  • @Traylbl43er007
    @Traylbl43er007 2 місяці тому +1

    The emilia theythemus 😂😂😂
    I can't 😂😂😂😂
    She probably evolves into the north American karen 😂

  • @omaramo19
    @omaramo19 Рік тому +4

    I feel like the Wagie should've been named the "Lesser Wagie"

  • @freshtowels3917
    @freshtowels3917 Місяць тому

    This was amazing. Content Machine's content is too real.

  • @MoleIOW
    @MoleIOW Рік тому +5

    This is a masterpiece and somehow so realistic

  • @YourCapyFrenBigly_3DPipes1999
    @YourCapyFrenBigly_3DPipes1999 23 дні тому

    I rarely have laughed so hard 😂😭💀💀
    You guys are so damn brilliant.
    🤣🤣

  • @_tissael_4393
    @_tissael_4393 2 місяці тому

    This is legit a professional 100% pure piece of documentary on human ethology here

  • @loydmartin9111
    @loydmartin9111 2 місяці тому +1

    Your work is the best comedy ever!

  • @letitialoughmiller1802
    @letitialoughmiller1802 14 днів тому

    You guys are soo funny and right on in ur generations assessment of the life we all.live..very talented..love it

  • @Jagm177-f9o
    @Jagm177-f9o Місяць тому

    Seeing it like this we are no different from any other species of animals no matter how sophisticated we try to present ourselves in the end the game is still the same.

  • @rahul.p777
    @rahul.p777 21 день тому

    They even manage to get David attenborough to narrate it.

  • @LeeSilvaa_10
    @LeeSilvaa_10 Місяць тому

    I don’t know if it’s funny because you guys have a wonderful acting or because you are telling the truth of this society!! 😂

  • @AnnaNakopia
    @AnnaNakopia Рік тому +3

    How aliens talk about our society 😭😂

  • @6366budjet
    @6366budjet 11 місяців тому +1

    Best documentary on people.

  • @catcherbrinson2737
    @catcherbrinson2737 Рік тому +3

    this is better than national geographic

  • @megapunchboy
    @megapunchboy Місяць тому

    Content machine is unstoppable

  • @rubywilliams7896
    @rubywilliams7896 Рік тому +1

    The best ever documentary ever made in history this needs a round of applause

  • @helengyamfiboateng9149
    @helengyamfiboateng9149 Місяць тому

    My favorite youtube channel ❤ love from ghana 🇬🇭

  • @firstdownsquad
    @firstdownsquad 8 місяців тому +1

    “Minimus Wagus” is CRAZY 💀😭

  • @Chara3690
    @Chara3690 Рік тому +1

    This documentary is so accurate that I just subbed ❤

  • @kristinacable
    @kristinacable Рік тому +4

    The hair bob...lol

  • @closetedninja9099
    @closetedninja9099 Рік тому +2

    Emilia TheyThemus got me wheezing HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • @aliciahackett4945
    @aliciahackett4945 Місяць тому

    Best thing I’ve watched all week. Pure gold.

  • @MechaDino51
    @MechaDino51 4 місяці тому

    I like how the Karen's mate is a different species💀

  • @tyreekmurillo4524
    @tyreekmurillo4524 5 місяців тому

    so what i’m hearing is i’m the karen’s kryptonite? nice

  • @GOLDplus2-yu5jp
    @GOLDplus2-yu5jp Рік тому +1

    LoL 😂😂😂😂..security officeraus.
    Husbandus flaccidus.... LoL 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @lucycarola
    @lucycarola 2 місяці тому

    This is probably how the more advanced civilizations see us anyway. 😂

  • @3AHN215
    @3AHN215 5 місяців тому

    Man, this is intergalactic geography. The aliens are watching in discust 💀👽👽

  • @dannil9878
    @dannil9878 18 днів тому

    The thing is chads don’t get The girl in The real life, but end up in prison. Karens are like this.
    These boys go to The thirstum category themselves

  • @jadensoria8786
    @jadensoria8786 Рік тому +1

    This is a masterpiece and beautiful

  • @ahlija
    @ahlija Місяць тому

    Karen adjusts her position.. 😂😂😂 omg im dead

  • @grumpycheerleader
    @grumpycheerleader 2 місяці тому

    You guys knocked it out the park with this one. Great job 😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @RCH369
    @RCH369 17 днів тому

    The Chad pose 😂😂😂😂. Had me rolling.

  • @ALrinea
    @ALrinea 2 місяці тому

    A Chad will never lose to a Karen.😂

  • @90210Skye
    @90210Skye Рік тому +1

    Next, the Simpus Flaccidus.

  • @mycrazyaklife
    @mycrazyaklife Рік тому +2

    Okay, who did u get to be narrator? Ive seen part 2 and 3 of this, and was searching for part 1. Glad you put them a together.

  • @craigwestbrook8932
    @craigwestbrook8932 Місяць тому

    I actually have seen the Linkus Inbiocene out in the wild. VERY fascinating creatures indeed!!!!😂😂😂

  • @venomgaming7014
    @venomgaming7014 Рік тому +1

    Idea for another planet earth: superintendus Rex.

  • @pawbless6892
    @pawbless6892 Місяць тому

    Love this BBC animal kingdom style 😂

  • @seagurl9369
    @seagurl9369 Рік тому

    OMG LAUGGHINGG, thanks for making theseee

  • @BluePijama
    @BluePijama Рік тому +1

    Such a Masterpiece!!! Cheers from Italy

  • @Someones_account_haha
    @Someones_account_haha 2 місяці тому

    I wish I was wagie, high earner one at that. Grateful you have a corporate/office job

  • @s.divyanshisethu1367
    @s.divyanshisethu1367 2 місяці тому

    Phenomenal! so unique and absolutely entertaining.!

  • @drengrarts5230
    @drengrarts5230 Місяць тому

    Chad went ultra-Riker.

  • @sethanpayne6324
    @sethanpayne6324 9 місяців тому +1

    How dare you end this

  • @shantipandey3399
    @shantipandey3399 Рік тому +3

    *I love this planet earth :)*
    *I’ve learned more about animals!!*

  • @dangerbear_
    @dangerbear_ Рік тому +2

    I wonder what anyone that just passes by thinks is going on 💀

  • @SQRH3
    @SQRH3 9 місяців тому

    That was all excellent! Especially the last skit..."tonight they will only be eating their pride"

  • @Sheeeeshack
    @Sheeeeshack Місяць тому +1

    Hysterically funny. Top rate 👌🏻👌🏻

  • @ericksg
    @ericksg Місяць тому

    I’m seriously enjoying all your content. Great talent and creativity!! 🎉🥸🤩

  • @luannfeld3983
    @luannfeld3983 2 місяці тому

    Hilarious! Thank you! I died laughing as the Karens known as the HOA approached!!

  • @seihanda8792
    @seihanda8792 Рік тому +2

    Is this what alien watch?

  • @tzatzikiv812
    @tzatzikiv812 2 місяці тому

    This os the BEST documentary I've ever seen. 😎👍🏻

  • @Yetipfote
    @Yetipfote 9 місяців тому

    this is waaaaayy to accurate bruh

  • @Alwaysbaggyjeans
    @Alwaysbaggyjeans 2 місяці тому

    "web of deception" 😂

  • @nitinsingh9487
    @nitinsingh9487 Місяць тому

    It's a real life documentary 😢

  • @jackwriter1908
    @jackwriter1908 Рік тому +1

    Why is this so good?!

  • @BabaGaba-yf6qg
    @BabaGaba-yf6qg Рік тому +1

    Best documentary ever

  • @Zdfzrfdsfj
    @Zdfzrfdsfj Рік тому

    I feel so bad for Karen's husband

  • @anaramos2802
    @anaramos2802 2 місяці тому

    Brilliant! Sir David Attenborough wouldn't make a better documentary on human nature.
    Subscribing to this channel is mandatory!

  • @GotMyTowel42
    @GotMyTowel42 Рік тому

    Missed opportunity to use Simpus Wussy