My husband passed 8-1/2 months ago and all these "first" have been a real struggle for me. I'm 67 now and had been with my husband since I was 22. We did everything together (you could say we were joined at the hips). My husband sustaine a traumatic head injury at the age of 53 and I became his soul caregiver. I was only 51 at that time. Together and with lots of help through hospitals, doctors and therapy, his life started to return to a new normal. He had to relearn everything (eating, toileting, bathing, walking, talking etc). It was like watching him grow through the years: infant, then toddler, teen, young adult and finally reaching back to adulthood. Over the years I thought it was the hardest thing to go through, but I was wrong . Losing the love of my life was even worse. Getting through all the "firsts", especially Thanksgiving and Christmas without him, I thought was the hardest That was until this morning when I woke up. I felt overwhelmed, stressed and dreading the thought of the New Year. The first thing that came to mind was: "how am I going to get through this?" and "How do I begin a New Year without him?" It was like a slap in the face. Then I saw your video and I just wanted to say, "Thank You"! You have been a tremendous help. Wishing you a safe & Happy New Year.
It helps to know that others have the same feelings wherever we are. I am in the UK, my husband died September 2023 and have done all the “firsts”. This community has given me so much support❤
My husband died May 9 2024 at the age of 52, we been together for 29 years. I talk to him everyday my heart is in a million pieces, but I do hope one day it’ll get better.
Leo mentions a memory quilt. I had jeans of my husband's and some of my old jeans turned into a patchwork jean throw. I wrap it around me and it's a tangible thing that represents the love we had together.
It’s been 4years I don’t know how to start my life over iam just sick of being depressed and sleeping all the time I want to find happiness I hope u will remember me in your prayers that god can help me to find peace and happiness it’s not fun always being alone
Don't make resolutions that's why they" drop the ball "every new year's ! I'm officially moving nxt wk and it's the first Time I moved in some place where nobody painted for me first and I look at All the things that he did around the house even though it took a lot of arguing😂 and realized he wasn't going to Spend hours complaining about my paint color choice and do it anyway.I haven't lived alone since I was 17 and I'm 62 So this is going to be super interesting it's very overwhelming
My husband and I split up in 2023. I didn't really want to, but it was his choice. During the proceedings, he was diagnosed with cancer. He passed away in August of this year (2024). I feel like I have survivors guilt. Why should I be happy? Why him? Why not me? I read a comment that a wife is feeling like she's leaving her deceased husband in 2024 as she prepares to go on in 2025. I can relate to that. I feel being alive to grieve him is - in a way - a luxury as I'm still living. Life is a gift.
It’s ok to appreciate that you are still alive. It’s a normal feeling, and so is the guilt you have for feeling it. Grief is confusing enough, but with the pending divorce, I’m sure that unit complicates things.
My husband died December 17, 2020 and the holidays are really hard. He died of Covid very suddenly. I try so hard to keep it together for the kids. I’m only 52 i I shouldn’t be widow this young. through it all the health conditions I've suffered has been extreme also 2021 I had a heart attack . I had the gastric sleeve December 16, 2023 2024 I had a Stroke and two grand mall seizures Luckily, my husband worked for US steel and I full pension. I've had to retire due to health problems, so I literally just sit here and think too much.
So glad to see your podcast this evening. This is my first December holiday season without my husband. Today I started crying again. I am so glad I have my dog, Bandit to take care of, without him I probably would not feel like getting out of bed most days. Your podcasts always make me feel better, and this one has given me somethings to think about; and that I am not alone in how I feel. Have a Happy and safe New Year’s Eve! All the best to you in the new year.
My husband passed 8-1/2 months ago and all these "first" have been a real struggle for me. I'm 67 now and had been with my husband since I was 22. We did everything together (you could say we were joined at the hips).
My husband sustaine a traumatic head injury at the age of 53 and I became his soul caregiver. I was only 51 at that time. Together and with lots of help through hospitals, doctors and therapy, his life started to return to a new normal. He had to relearn everything (eating, toileting, bathing, walking, talking etc). It was like watching him grow through the years: infant, then toddler, teen, young adult and finally reaching back to adulthood. Over the years I thought it was the hardest thing to go through, but I was wrong . Losing the love of my life was even worse. Getting through all the "firsts", especially Thanksgiving and Christmas without him, I thought was the hardest That was until this morning when I woke up. I felt overwhelmed, stressed and dreading the thought of the New Year. The first thing that came to mind was: "how am I going to get through this?" and "How do I begin a New Year without him?" It was like a slap in the face. Then I saw your video and I just wanted to say, "Thank You"! You have been a tremendous help. Wishing you a safe & Happy New Year.
So glad this topic was helpful!
We had very similar circumstances, prayers that we find a way through this.I believe with God's help we can❤
It helps to know that others have the same feelings wherever we are. I am in the UK, my husband died September 2023 and have done all the “firsts”. This community has given me so much support❤
My husband died May 9 2024 at the age of 52, we been together for 29 years. I talk to him everyday my heart is in a million pieces, but I do hope one day it’ll get better.
Leo mentions a memory quilt. I had jeans of my husband's and some of my old jeans turned into a patchwork jean throw.
I wrap it around me and it's a tangible thing that represents the love we had together.
What a wonderful idea!
I lost my husband of 42 years this past June,so it really does feel like you said,moving in to a new year without him is so hard☹
Thanks for watching
Thank you for these ideas. Just getting through the holidays is super hard for me❤
I understand that!
Thank you for your help and support. In some parts of the video, the audio seems to speed up a lot.
Sorry about that, thanks for watching!
It’s been 4years I don’t know how to start my life over iam just sick of being depressed and sleeping all the time I want to find happiness I hope u will remember me in your prayers that god can help me to find peace and happiness it’s not fun always being alone
Praying for you! 🙏
Hello happy new year. I need this thank you so much. This is the first one without my spouse
Thanks for watching
Don't make resolutions that's why they" drop the ball "every new year's ! I'm officially moving nxt wk and it's the first Time I moved in some place where nobody painted for me first and I look at All the things that he did around the house even though it took a lot of arguing😂 and realized he wasn't going to Spend hours complaining about my paint color choice and do it anyway.I haven't lived alone since I was 17 and I'm 62 So this is going to be super interesting it's very overwhelming
You can do it!
My husband and I split up in 2023. I didn't really want to, but it was his choice. During the proceedings, he was diagnosed with cancer. He passed away in August of this year (2024). I feel like I have survivors guilt. Why should I be happy? Why him? Why not me? I read a comment that a wife is feeling like she's leaving her deceased husband in 2024 as she prepares to go on in 2025. I can relate to that. I feel being alive to grieve him is - in a way - a luxury as I'm still living. Life is a gift.
It’s ok to appreciate that you are still alive. It’s a normal feeling, and so is the guilt you have for feeling it. Grief is confusing enough, but with the pending divorce, I’m sure that unit complicates things.
My husband died December 17, 2020 and the holidays are really hard. He died of Covid very suddenly. I try so hard to keep it together for the kids. I’m only 52 i I shouldn’t be widow this young. through it all the health conditions I've suffered has been extreme also 2021 I had a heart attack . I had the gastric sleeve December 16, 2023 2024 I had a Stroke and two grand mall seizures Luckily, my husband worked for US steel and I full pension. I've had to retire due to health problems, so I literally just sit here and think too much.
I'm so sorry #widfam. Check out the pivot course, it might be helpful: www.griefpivotcourse.com
I’m so sorry
I lost my husband September 2022. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done
Sending you my love and a hug. Know your not alone 💗🤗
So glad to see your podcast this evening. This is my first December holiday season without my husband. Today I started crying again. I am so glad I have my dog, Bandit to take care of, without him I probably would not feel like getting out of bed most days. Your podcasts always make me feel better, and this one has given me somethings to think about; and that I am not alone in how I feel. Have a Happy and safe New Year’s Eve! All the best to you in the new year.
Does this get better?
We get better at carrying the weight.
I think we gradually get more able to live and enjoy small pockets of happiness as time goes on. (16months in) ❤️