Her children were her purpose. Without them she feels she has no purpose. Also it feels like she endured some trauma being pregnant at 16 and clearly feels she didn't have a support.
A mother’s love for her children!! The people in this world today is different it’s not the world it’s the people that live in it so I could understand her when it comes to her children it’s evil people out there she don’t want them to get mixed in any thing it’s evil people out in the world
My children are grown 35, 27 and 26. When my oldest moved out, she moved to another state. I was devastated but eventually realized it was time for her to live her life. As parents, we want to keep them near to protect them. Trust that you poured into them the ingredients that they need to succeed. I am so proud of my children and the life that they carved out for themselves and their children. Trust them...
Keeping them near to protect them doesn't do anything it's an ego thing and if you try to keep them near their just going to resent you they're going to resent you and they're going to be angry and I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want that so I'm really glad that you finally have the courage to just let your kids go because if you trief to keep them around they would resent you would not want to have anything to do with you again I will say the same thing to you that I said to her I'm sorry but that's the truth and the truth hurts
We also have to realize as parents, that it is God that protects our children through our prayers. Let’s remain on our knees and intercede for our children. May God continue to protect them in Jesus mighty name. Thank you for sharing. God bless you!
To everyone in the comments that are speaking positive.. I really appreciate you guys .. I’ll be starting my channel soon .. I’ll be updating you guys on what’s going on in our lives🤧 I love ❤️ my kids ‼️
I feel the same as you! My 25 and 26yr old moved out and I became very depressed. They cut me off because they felt like I was too clingy. It's only been us 3 their whole lives. I paid for their college, my oldest just graduated in December with her Masters and my youngest is in vet school. I became homeless for approximately 5 Mos, and they had apartments and wouldn't let me stay with them. It's only now that they have begun to come around, and honestly, I'm still very mad at them.
She’s having empty nest syndrome as well. It happens when parents base their whole and entire lives around raising up their children. Not knowing that one day their kids will grow up and have a life to live on their own. Parents aren’t prepared for their children to leave. I pray that mother works on her healing and put in place the people places and things she will need for this next chapter and transition in their lives. Because whether she like it or not. It’s going to happen. ❤
I have and we are doing just fine .. this show was filmed In January it’s now June and he’s just now posting.. my daughter has graduated and will be attending college in the fall ❤
This woman needs to accept the fact that her kids are now grown and they are leaving the nest. They aren’t kids anymore and They’re doing what they’re supposed to be doing and that’s growing into young, responsible, independent adults.
@@candicream You put your business out there, there will be positive and negative comments. I'm not being disrespected but maybe look in shadow work. The heal the little girl inside. It's time for you now you have dine your best now take a rest. Go out and have fun with yourself, not to find a man but to find you 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
@@lov5334? The comments are just things Karamo repeated, so no. She doesn’t need you and every other self made therapist in the comments trying to tell her about herself.
My mom acts like this. She started having kids at 15 so she used to us needing her but everybody grown.. it’s like they need ppl to rely on them to feel good.
My mom the same way. Like baby I’m an adult now love lol 😂 So I can relate this this video 💯 It’s an ego and pride thing with parents that feel like we need to stay with her for the rest of her life. Nah baby! It’s called being controlling, manipulative, narcissistic behaviors she trying on her kids but they ain’t having it. Lol 😂 I can tell the mom does love her kids and the kids love her but the mom has learn how to trust her kids. ❤🥰
I had my son at 14 and he’s 17 now 😢. At times I’m like awwwww my baby isn’t a baby anymore. However I don’t smother him and I let him be independent. My son is awesome, he works, respectful, meek, and an honor roll student. I feel I’ve done great so far.
My mom is the same way. I’m not sure she can identify herself outside of motherhood and that makes me sad. My mom was 23 when she had my twin sister and I but my grandmother was 16 when she had my mom. It’s been passed down.
My mom is like this. She pushed us all away. I moved states away and haven’t seen my mom in 3 years because she’s like this. Parents need to realize that children are supposed to grow up and become independent. It doesn’t mean we love you any less. We are supposed to forge our own paths. Her behavior is going to push them away. Kudos to her for acknowledging that she has flaws and hang ups.
True..... Glad you're on your own now but at least always reach out to her to reassure her that you still love and care for her. If possible travel to meet her and spend that lil moments. Remain blessed❤
highly agree , being too strict will push them away. my parents are like this . i know they love but they always want me close to home, work /school that’s why i went to college 4 1/2 hours away. i’m now looking to move and my mom says since you want to move now i’m stuck here , since she wanted to move so everyone could have space . i feel like i’m guilted into staying because they always need my help, mind you im 28 treated like im 13
This reminds me of the talk my mother and I had, and I had to remind her multiple times, “You raised me! And you did a damn good job. Trust in yourself that you did a great job, and trust in me that I will hold on to what you taught me.” From henceforth we’ve been great. It’s sometimes a very necessary conversation to have.
IDK but I kept sensing a little resentment from the kids and I also think the real reason she feels"alone" and they "won't need her anymore" sounds more like "I can't control them anymore"
we need more conversations like this with black mothers. Not judging her as a mother but if you know then you know how it is especially with us daughters
This woman did a very great job with accountability taking the truth with grace and poise she never interrupted them or got hostile with them for their truth.
The best flattery of knowing you did your best as a parent. Is when your children don’t need you anymore because they have become independent. Parents don’t live for ever, so it’s a blessing to know that the children can fend for themselves. Parents should have organic conversations and not constantly lecture. Let the children talk, so you can understand where their mind at because a parent isn’t always going to be there to fix everything. Children will be in situations that they have to be able to navigate through
I don’t think it’s a matter of them growing up and are becoming adults it’s about the nurturing part of her relationship with them that was lacking. She was so busy trying to keep them away of this and that and being the disciplinarian that she forgot the hugs, listening, celebrating etc.. My girl is 16 and I’m proud and happy that I made sure all parts of our relationship has been explored. As your kid gets older your relationship should change a bit.
It’s sad to see her blinded vision; she says her kids can come and communicate to her but they claim they gotta walk on eggshells. She just needs to do some inner work and heal so they can all have a healthy dynamic
As a mother she just wants the best for her children. She is very receptive of constructive criticism and realizes that she has a barrier up when it comes communication to certain degree. For those saying the daughter is grown she is not she is yet a child. Even though she has poured so much good energy into those positive beings. I absolutely love the way they spoke about each other. Moma bear everything will be a okay, trust in God, and trust in therapy as a unit.
We have to stop passing down ish from massa. Get up clean up no time to rest. Sometimes we act like our kids are slaves and we are massa. We have to stop these generational curses. We have to stop raising our daughters so hard and loving our sons like the girls don't need love too. Then wonder why he is dusty. I am proud of them.
As a Teen mother and passing down trauma is real . Because the moment you become Teen mother is Like you have to work hard as you let the family down and an embarrassment coming from a strict African house hold and teen mum , I knew how to get my self into therapy quick because is a lot . .
ughhh this one brought tears to my eyes lowkey and i never cry but when the girl said that when everyone is gone from the field her mom is the only one gonna still hold the sign and be there for them that had me woow that felt very touching oof
@@candicreamwe appreciate you mom you’re great one beautiful 😍 your children is the results of your hard work but they’re blossoming beautifully true their process ❤
Like what do parents like this actually expect? You're hard on your children and want them to be independent. Done ✅ DO NOT expect them to come running back or to be close to you when you did not create a warm environment for the relationship to thrive. Also, stop projecting your past/fears on your children. Nobody is perfect but therapy is a necessity to help us through the lows in life. It's not easy but it's a step in the right direction. Break generational curses and childhood trauma. Parents do not realize that their children become a product of their environment. Children may not feel free to express themselves, they'll bottle things up, isolate, feel anxious, dwell in negative thoughts, overthink, have low self esteem, experience depression, etc. Parents, you do not know it all (vice versa). Remain open minded, teach each other, and grow.
U have grown ppl living in their parents home up until they’re 40 sometimes , You know you did right as a parent that your kids can spread their wings and fly high in greatness and not destruction . I can understand her worry of being alone but it’s time for a man hehehe . Because they seem to be raised right . Blessing to them tho ❤
@candicream its ok u r truly a good mother in my eyes and my children are young right now but i know i will feel this way about them one day have a blessed life 💖
I understand mom completely.. In our community you have to keep a tight grip on your kids. It’s from the trauma. Mom did a great job.. but some boundaries and some balance are needed. I hope they can work it out
I was raised very sheltered in a strict single mom home and even though I moved 3 hours away at 17, I spent a long time being on my own but not feeling independent even though I was. It was because any problems I always had to check in with her before making any decisions. It took me objectively hearing I need to set boundaries with her for both of us to finally have an adult mom and daughter relationship. She resisted at first but has become so respectful of my boundaries over time. I had to learn to do the same too.
Keroma: “when did you notice the change in regards to you and your children’s relationship” Mom: “when they got older” Guys, children think things are normal and that’s why they do as told. When they get older they eventually learn what is actually supposed to be and lash out. That’s why things change
My sons are 28,27,24 and 16. Even though they move out and have a family of their own trust me they will need you more than ever, you may still argue, fight and have problems but it will all work out in the end. At the end of the day you will always be a mother from day one and afterlife has ended.
GREAT mother and GREAT children you can tell she has their best interest at heart and they know she does they love each other very much but EVERYONE has to learn to be independent including Mom. you will always be a team but their is a “m & e” in team choose you learn to love yourself as much as you love them❤️
Mama you are so beautiful,you have raised beautiful and well articulated children,I promise you,they will remember what you have taught them. It's now time for you to go to bora bora,meet someone amazing and go enjoy yourself.The almost 18 want to be an adult,let her, very soon she will realize what you have been saying. Go enjoy your life Mama 🤗🤗
I totally get this family. I'm 55 years old and grew up the same way. My mom had me when she was 16 years old; she expected the home spotless, and was very strict on me. I couldn't keep company until my senior year...I literally didn't like my mom until much later in life. She told me that she was that way, not wanted me to repeat her mistakes.
Awww 😢 What a beautiful family, I just want to hug them. I pray that they stick together and work through these issues❤. I also hope mom gets some therapy for her control issues… let them grow Mom, you did the best you could, they love you and will return home… just gotta let them fly freely a bit ❤
She done a great job with her children. I'm so proud of her she's got a strength she taught her kids That and let them move forward. Proud of your kids too, they're so amazing. 🎉
I pray Candi (mom) gets to a place where she understands her behavior and how she treats them is going to make what she fears most become real. Right now, she is all in her head and I think she is protecting herself as well based on what she been through. They are becoming young adults and can only tolerate so much and if the relationship she has with them today doesn't change she will lose them little by little. It is hard to let go when all you have been about is your kids. Trust that you have given them all they need to face this world and let them find themselves. They will come to you when they need you..trust me. My "adult" children and I are closer now than ever and it's annoying sometimes because its always something, but I wouldn't change it for the world. #loveisthemedicine
There is way more to this story. So whatever is going on will likely continue. Hopefully she goes to anger management. I’m not understanding why kamaro did not say anything about the boy in the house. Any mother would be upset about that. And we didn’t get clarity on her reaction so idk.
Can COMPLETELY RELATE! Your kids don’t have anything to do with ur issues..go to therapy! How are you gonna fear losing someone but continue to do negative things to push them away?
You are a great Mom! Just let go and trust what you have instilled into your beautiful young adults and you all will be fine. Totally trust God ! Amen 🙏
Thank you bunches Karamo; definitely hit home. I seen myself in this episode no doubt. I have to young men 31 & 26 and did the samething without realizing. Please, continue to help families like us see that there is another way.
There is nothing wrong with being sad about your kids leaving. This is also a different phase in moms life. We don't get a manual on how u navigate thru the feelings. I know for me it's also about just missing my boy and although I'm so proud of the man he's become, I miss him being under the same roof.I miss seeing him every day, he's such a great person and i miss knowing a lot of what goes on in his life. This new role of parenting from a different position is something to adjust to. It's new to the parent and the child.
I definitely understand the “MOM”. To the kids you will understand when you have kiddos of your own as you continue to grow and experience the world on your own you will ALWAYS need your mom
My mom had 5 kids by the time she turned 22. She would ride us so badly. She would beat us for even looking at boys or talking to boys. It was even worse when she became an addict. Her moods and paranoia were thru the roof, she didnt trust us with any man. She even accused my sister of having an affair with her husband. I was so terrified to even date that I was in my 20s before i lost my virginity, and when my mom found out, she cussed me slam out and called me a hoe. I tried to commit suicide after that, but I was unsuccessful. But after that day I chose peace. I stopped going around her and my family and withdrew further into myself, always afraid to come out of my shell. Im older now, and I recently started trying to repair my relationship with my mom. It's not easy because sometimes im a little resentful, but im trying.
Sending you healing energies. I’m glad you’re still here with us. Don’t give up on yourself. Like you said you were doing, continue to choose peace over anything.
GOD 1ST. PRAYER WORKS.. STAY AWAY FROM DRAMA, PROTECT YOUR PEACE.. THAT MOTHER WAS EVIL, AND ANGRY,, SHE HAS DONE THE WORST TO THAT GIRL, NOW TRYING TO MAKE UP SO THEY WON'T LEAVE HER FOR GOOD.. PEOPLE DON'T CHANGE THEY JUST GET OLDER.. WHEN YOUR YOUNG YOU DONT SEE IT, YOU DON'T SEE THE PAIN PARENTS HAVE CAUSED,, YOU MUST MAKE YOUR LIFE BEAUTIFUL AND EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH MAKE IT LOVE❤❤❤ GOD GIT HIS LOVE ALL OVER YOU.. LIVE❤
Girl let it go and move on. I tried that for years and I always ended back in the same place. Hurt by the person who is supposed to love you most. Stop, it’s mental insanity! You deserve to be happy even if that means excluding her from your life.
he does a pretty good job of helping his guests & i love that his heart is in actually helping ppl… hopefully the budget next season will allow for a consistent therapist to be present & for lie detector tests instead of unlocked phones..
Yes parents out there!! Believe that you raised your kids right! Let them show you what they got because as parents, you never stop parenting even after 18. Help them when they fall just like when they were babies but let them make their own mistakes
The statements from the two audience members were amazing!! ❤❤ She def has a fear of being lone, momma gotta find a man or something cause your kids are going to leave the nest no matter what. Her behaviors are only going to push them further away.
With the mom saying to her daughter, “I can’t trust you anymore”, I feel like mom was trying to part ways from her daughter early so that it would hurt less if it became reality.
This is the best one yet. I had to do this with my mom as well. My grandma didn't raise my mom. It was an alcoholic home, angry. My grandma is a narcissist(faked degrees and all) so my mom had no education (it was also the 90s, I was 3 weeks late). She now acknowledges there were things she did that were not healthy for me or unfair as I was only 11 when my dad left. But I ACKNOWLEDGE she didn't know any better. I also have bad trauma and mental illness and she didn't ask for that either. My father never took accountability. My mom does and she sees it now clearly.
What a beautiful family. I’m not a crier but the mom was making me tear up you can tell she loves her children so much she’s just struggling on how to show it
Momma, you did good honey. You did good. Now it’s time for them to go and make their decisions. They will learn from their mistakes as they get older, but honey, you did good 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I would go to the BEST AND FARAWAY COLLEGE THAT I CAN GO.. RUNNNNN.. THAT'S A MOMMY DEAREST.. THE ABUSIVE MOTHER.. THOSE GROWN CHILDREN CAN'T EVEN WHISPER.. THAT'S SAD.. YOU CAN SEE THE ABUSE THEY'VE ENDORED
Am I the only one that thinks the mum being angry that her daughter had boy in the house when she wasn't home wasn't unreasonable, or am I missing the point? Lol. Also I love the fact the mum took accountability for her ways
I,2 when I came a empty nester. I didn't kno wat to do with Self. I was in fear to move on in life for not having the children n had locked out ppl for being hurt n misunderstood.
I have 3 23 21 and 17 and I was strict and my children thanks me for being the way I was with them because together we've broken teen pregnancy we have all high school grads no felons and no gang ties. So everyone family is different
Imagine justifying someone who won’t even let her kids grow up 💀 my mom wasn’t strict and all of us turned out great being strict gets you nowhere expect like this lady
@@NaNa-ln6jg clearly you're not reading to understand everyone family is different Im justified because my 3 Mine the ones I gave birth to I was strict with came out great all grads no kids no felons no attitudes still don't curse in front of adults and thanks me on a daily so shut up. I said what I said with my perspective you turned out good great mines turned out awesome amazing will it work for everyone no which is why I said EVERY FAMILY DIFFERENT Jesus Christ thanks for your pointless comment
@@poohchi6205 well why no one asked the CHILD if the mom was home would you have had the guy over? Justified teen sex unnecessary problems that children just don't need but we're bad for wanting better for our children these children be babies and they want us to let them do all as they please gtho
People kill me so the world a way better place now that we allow children to dictate how they want to be raised any kind of discipline is abuse but them dying at these young ages because they out doing dumb shit is fine too they're just being kids right and it don't mean shit. Well mines made it strict and all and I'm proud y'all can keep this gentle parenting
Fear = False evidence appearing real… She raised very bright intelligent kids she now has to let go and live her life not saying to forget her kids bc they will always need her no matter what age they are she just needs to understand there young adults and cut the cord and be a supporting loving mom and be proud of her kids ❤
I’m going through something similar. I have an 19 year old, and 16 year old, i keep telling myself that my baby boy is going to be 18 soon and I’ll be left all alone. I also feel not needed anymore, my 19 year old never really wants to do things with me anymore. Like going to the movies, or out to eat. My youngest still do those things but i know it’s only cause he’s still young. I fear when he turns 18 all that will soon stop too. having children that their whole life they needed you came home from school with the biggest smiles hugs and kisses you feel so much loved where they’re smaller 😢
This made me cry so much! 😭😭😭😭 I understand the mother so much she’s so much like me, even if I don’t have kids I have family, but I’m like that I don’t wanna be alone and they’re the only thing that keeps me going, but now I understand just watching from this video to also just listen and not cause my family to much nagging or being to clingy. This is just so beautiful. 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️
Wow my daughters are 1 & 2 I got a long way to go but when they decide to start they life ima be sad too lol but happy to see them Living they life using the things I taught them and things they learned along the way . Now as a parent at 27 everything my mom taught helped me be the women & mother I am today . She seems like a good mom & her children seem like good kids she did something right she gotta let them do them so she can be proud and know she won't be lonely they will create families and she'll get grand babies 🥰
this women is a great example of how it should be done the problem is that she has raised to beautiul children and now it time for her own peace but when ur 16 thats all u know i hope this gorgeouss lady finds her peace cuz she def deserve it and her kids to
Her children were her purpose. Without them she feels she has no purpose. Also it feels like she endured some trauma being pregnant at 16 and clearly feels she didn't have a support.
I can see that & I agree her kids was her comfort zone even tho she was strict but as a teen mother I know she didn’t have a choice but to be strict
Oh well cry about it
She may have an anger issue, but her sense of accountability is very healing. I believe that this family will do well.
she needs to realize that her kids are growing up and becoming independent
She should be Jumping for joy.
And from the looks of it she did a good job!! Lord I will my kids wouldn’t depend on me and leave me alone
It seems like she has abandonment issues. So even though her children are growing she still wants her children to rely on her
Empty nest syndrome
A mother’s love for her children!! The people in this world today is different it’s not the world it’s the people that live in it so I could understand her when it comes to her children it’s evil people out there she don’t want them to get mixed in any thing it’s evil people out in the world
My children are grown 35, 27 and 26. When my oldest moved out, she moved to another state. I was devastated but eventually realized it was time for her to live her life. As parents, we want to keep them near to protect them. Trust that you poured into them the ingredients that they need to succeed. I am so proud of my children and the life that they carved out for themselves and their children. Trust them...
Keeping them near to protect them doesn't do anything it's an ego thing and if you try to keep them near their just going to resent you they're going to resent you and they're going to be angry and I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want that so I'm really glad that you finally have the courage to just let your kids go because if you trief to keep them around they would resent you would not want to have anything to do with you again I will say the same thing to you that I said to her I'm sorry but that's the truth and the truth hurts
We also have to realize as parents, that it is God that protects our children through our prayers. Let’s remain on our knees and intercede for our children. May God continue to protect them in Jesus mighty name. Thank you for sharing. God bless you!
@@jessicajohnson8378 I agree with everything you stated except for the ego part!
@@philomenaezeh7770 Exactly! God bless you as well 🙏🏾
@@Demetria1021 Amen 🙏
The fact that this is the first mother I seen on this show take accountability of her actions
Wow
Literally that just shows she love them fr
Yeah it is ❤🥰
Wish my mom did that frr
@@ItsStarbabyysame .
To everyone in the comments that are speaking positive.. I really appreciate you guys .. I’ll be starting my channel soon .. I’ll be updating you guys on what’s going on in our lives🤧 I love ❤️ my kids ‼️
we don't doubt it. this video helped me realize different things in my own family! will subscribe!
I feel the same as you! My 25 and 26yr old moved out and I became very depressed. They cut me off because they felt like I was too clingy. It's only been us 3 their whole lives. I paid for their college, my oldest just graduated in December with her Masters and my youngest is in vet school. I became homeless for approximately 5 Mos, and they had apartments and wouldn't let me stay with them. It's only now that they have begun to come around, and honestly, I'm still very mad at them.
You for sure love your kids, can’t deny that. Most def intrigued 🫶🏽
You are just the sweetest ❤ my mom is very similar, I see I lot of her in you
Yay I’ll definitely follow
She’s having empty nest syndrome as well. It happens when parents base their whole and entire lives around raising up their children. Not knowing that one day their kids will grow up and have a life to live on their own. Parents aren’t prepared for their children to leave. I pray that mother works on her healing and put in place the people places and things she will need for this next chapter and transition in their lives. Because whether she like it or not. It’s going to happen. ❤
I have and we are doing just fine .. this show was filmed In January it’s now June and he’s just now posting.. my daughter has graduated and will be attending college in the fall ❤
@@candicreamcongratulations ❤❤❤❤
This woman needs to accept the fact that her kids are now grown and they are leaving the nest. They aren’t kids anymore and They’re doing what they’re supposed to be doing and that’s growing into young, responsible, independent adults.
I’m very aware and understand.. if your not in my shoes then we can’t relate.. I love my kids unconditionally.. thank you‼️🤧
@@candicream You put your business out there, there will be positive and negative comments.
I'm not being disrespected but maybe look in shadow work. The heal the little girl inside. It's time for you now you have dine your best now take a rest.
Go out and have fun with yourself, not to find a man but to find you 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
@@lov5334? The comments are just things Karamo repeated, so no. She doesn’t need you and every other self made therapist in the comments trying to tell her about herself.
@@lov5334no
My mom acts like this. She started having kids at 15 so she used to us needing her but everybody grown.. it’s like they need ppl to rely on them to feel good.
My mom the same way. Like baby I’m an adult now love lol 😂 So I can relate this this video 💯 It’s an ego and pride thing with parents that feel like we need to stay with her for the rest of her life. Nah baby! It’s called being controlling, manipulative, narcissistic behaviors she trying on her kids but they ain’t having it. Lol 😂 I can tell the mom does love her kids and the kids love her but the mom has learn how to trust her kids. ❤🥰
I had my son at 14 and he’s 17 now 😢. At times I’m like awwwww my baby isn’t a baby anymore. However I don’t smother him and I let him be independent. My son is awesome, he works, respectful, meek, and an honor roll student. I feel I’ve done great so far.
My mom is the same way. I’m not sure she can identify herself outside of motherhood and that makes me sad. My mom was 23 when she had my twin sister and I but my grandmother was 16 when she had my mom. It’s been passed down.
My mom is like this. She pushed us all away. I moved states away and haven’t seen my mom in 3 years because she’s like this. Parents need to realize that children are supposed to grow up and become independent. It doesn’t mean we love you any less. We are supposed to forge our own paths. Her behavior is going to push them away. Kudos to her for acknowledging that she has flaws and hang ups.
True.....
Glad you're on your own now but at least always reach out to her to reassure her that you still love and care for her. If possible travel to meet her and spend that lil moments.
Remain blessed❤
The woman deserves to know if you are alive or dead. Nobodyn realizes how much parents worry until they ARE PARENTS.
highly agree , being too strict will push them away. my parents are like this . i know they love but they always want me close to home, work /school that’s why i went to college 4 1/2 hours away. i’m now looking to move and my mom says since you want to move now i’m stuck here , since she wanted to move so everyone could have space . i feel like i’m guilted into staying because they always need my help, mind you im 28 treated like im 13
Be happy that your children are independent and strong enough to take care of themselves.
This reminds me of the talk my mother and I had, and I had to remind her multiple times, “You raised me! And you did a damn good job. Trust in yourself that you did a great job, and trust in me that I will hold on to what you taught me.” From henceforth we’ve been great. It’s sometimes a very necessary conversation to have.
I love how well that audience member articulated their self
IDK but I kept sensing a little resentment from the kids and I also think the real reason she feels"alone" and they "won't need her anymore" sounds more like "I can't control them anymore"
that momma love her kids..
The mom is deeply insecure and has abandonment issues.
but is actively pushing her kids away by her actions. It's crazy
we need more conversations like this with black mothers. Not judging her as a mother but if you know then you know how it is especially with us daughters
Yes exactly
I love how patient, calm & encouraging you are Karamo with your guest.
Rights and so am i to
This woman did a very great job with accountability taking the truth with grace and poise she never interrupted them or got hostile with them for their truth.
The best flattery of knowing you did your best as a parent. Is when your children don’t need you anymore because they have become independent. Parents don’t live for ever, so it’s a blessing to know that the children can fend for themselves. Parents should have organic conversations and not constantly lecture. Let the children talk, so you can understand where their mind at because a parent isn’t always going to be there to fix everything. Children will be in situations that they have to be able to navigate through
The first thing that I thought of when I heard her say at 0:31 “I feel like I’m losing them”, is that she meant she was losing control of them.
I don’t think it’s a matter of them growing up and are becoming adults it’s about the nurturing part of her relationship with them that was lacking. She was so busy trying to keep them away of this and that and being the disciplinarian that she forgot the hugs, listening, celebrating etc.. My girl is 16 and I’m proud and happy that I made sure all parts of our relationship has been explored. As your kid gets older your relationship should change a bit.
Your comment is the most Compassionate I have read, because I feel the same. Being a Parent is not easy.
My inner child is crying. This story sounds so personal🥹 I hope they can all heal.
Me too! Eating me alive
It’s sad to see her blinded vision; she says her kids can come and communicate to her but they claim they gotta walk on eggshells. She just needs to do some inner work and heal so they can all have a healthy dynamic
As a mother she just wants the best for her children. She is very receptive of constructive criticism and realizes that she has a barrier up when it comes communication to certain degree. For those saying the daughter is grown she is not she is yet a child. Even though she has poured so much good energy into those positive beings. I absolutely love the way they spoke about each other. Moma bear everything will be a okay, trust in God, and trust in therapy as a unit.
The mom looking like their big sis❤🔥
@@marianamwanje8968 never aging 🤣🤣😌
We have to stop passing down ish from massa. Get up clean up no time to rest. Sometimes we act like our kids are slaves and we are massa. We have to stop these generational curses. We have to stop raising our daughters so hard and loving our sons like the girls don't need love too. Then wonder why he is dusty. I am proud of them.
this!
The best comment
@@stopit41 💗
Mom needs friends and hobbies for herself.
I agree with that
@@wavynaturalista I started my channel… I’m open to new friends and subbies 🥹😌
Her daughter will be 18 soon. Let her grow up.
Mom you are pushing them away 🎉 Claiming you all heal🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
As a Teen mother and passing down trauma is real . Because the moment you become Teen mother is Like you have to work hard as you let the family down and an embarrassment coming from a strict African house hold and teen mum , I knew how to get my self into therapy quick because is a lot . .
ughhh this one brought tears to my eyes lowkey and i never cry but when the girl said that when everyone is gone from the field her mom is the only one gonna still hold the sign and be there for them that had me woow that felt very touching oof
This was the most beautiful episode ever because mother reminded me of me … she’s so beautiful all around
@@tionahancock1354 thank you 😇😘
@@candicreamwe appreciate you mom you’re great one beautiful 😍 your children is the results of your hard work but they’re blossoming beautifully true their process ❤
Like what do parents like this actually expect? You're hard on your children and want them to be independent. Done ✅ DO NOT expect them to come running back or to be close to you when you did not create a warm environment for the relationship to thrive. Also, stop projecting your past/fears on your children.
Nobody is perfect but therapy is a necessity to help us through the lows in life. It's not easy but it's a step in the right direction. Break generational curses and childhood trauma. Parents do not realize that their children become a product of their environment. Children may not feel free to express themselves, they'll bottle things up, isolate, feel anxious, dwell in negative thoughts, overthink, have low self esteem, experience depression, etc. Parents, you do not know it all (vice versa). Remain open minded, teach each other, and grow.
Agree with everything I’m healing my childhood trauma
Same here I'm healing ❤
I love what young lady in the blue said , that was exactly what everyone needed to hear
I love when Karamo
Says “mmmmm!” I’m like where’s my notepad this is about to be good like some great food !!
U have grown ppl living in their parents home up until they’re 40 sometimes , You know you did right as a parent that your kids can spread their wings and fly high in greatness and not destruction . I can understand her worry of being alone but it’s time for a man hehehe . Because they seem to be raised right . Blessing to them tho ❤
She’s upset she’s losing control over them. If they become independent, she wont have anyone to take her frustration out on anymore or to boss around.
Its all good this means she truly loves her kids hopefully she can let them spread their wings
I have come to my senses 😄 and yes I’m adjusting ❤ thank you for your kind words😊
@candicream its ok u r truly a good mother in my eyes and my children are young right now but i know i will feel this way about them one day have a blessed life 💖
@@tarahill8488 thank you 🙏🏽🥹❤️
You have to let the young adults go so they can grow live learn let go let God
I understand mom completely.. In our community you have to keep a tight grip on your kids. It’s from the trauma. Mom did a great job.. but some boundaries and some balance are needed. I hope they can work it out
@@TheValerieMichelle thank you 😊, I have took a step back and I’m letting them live there life’s
I was raised very sheltered in a strict single mom home and even though I moved 3 hours away at 17, I spent a long time being on my own but not feeling independent even though I was. It was because any problems I always had to check in with her before making any decisions. It took me objectively hearing I need to set boundaries with her for both of us to finally have an adult mom and daughter relationship. She resisted at first but has become so respectful of my boundaries over time. I had to learn to do the same too.
Keroma: “when did you notice the change in regards to you and your children’s relationship”
Mom: “when they got older”
Guys, children think things are normal and that’s why they do as told. When they get older they eventually learn what is actually supposed to be and lash out. That’s why things change
My sons are 28,27,24 and 16. Even though they move out and have a family of their own trust me they will need you more than ever, you may still argue, fight and have problems but it will all work out in the end. At the end of the day you will always be a mother from day one and afterlife has ended.
I say you kids are so blessed to have your mother while she's still living, all I can say, love ❤️ your mother 👩🏾 while she's still living!!!
GREAT mother and GREAT children you can tell she has their best interest at heart and they know she does they love each other very much but EVERYONE has to learn to be independent including Mom. you will always be a team but their is a “m & e” in team choose you learn to love yourself as much as you love them❤️
@@CornesiaSnow thank you 😊
Mama you are so beautiful,you have raised beautiful and well articulated children,I promise you,they will remember what you have taught them.
It's now time for you to go to bora bora,meet someone amazing and go enjoy yourself.The almost 18 want to be an adult,let her, very soon she will realize what you have been saying.
Go enjoy your life Mama 🤗🤗
@@babieatiti7259 awww ☺️ thank you , I’ve definitely took a step back and I’m letting them GROW
I totally get this family. I'm 55 years old and grew up the same way. My mom had me when she was 16 years old; she expected the home spotless, and was very strict on me. I couldn't keep company until my senior year...I literally didn't like my mom until much later in life. She told me that she was that way, not wanted me to repeat her mistakes.
Awww 😢 What a beautiful family, I just want to hug them. I pray that they stick together and work through these issues❤. I also hope mom gets some therapy for her control issues… let them grow Mom, you did the best you could, they love you and will return home… just gotta let them fly freely a bit ❤
@@MsBenitaButrell thank you 😊, and I’ve learned to step back and let them GROW
She done a great job with her children. I'm so proud of her she's got a strength she taught her kids That
and let them move forward. Proud of your kids too, they're so amazing.
🎉
@@PamelaEdmonds-zd8xu thank you , this comment means a lot to me 🥹
I pray Candi (mom) gets to a place where she understands her behavior and how she treats them is going to make what she fears most become real. Right now, she is all in her head and I think she is protecting herself as well based on what she been through. They are becoming young adults and can only tolerate so much and if the relationship she has with them today doesn't change she will lose them little by little. It is hard to let go when all you have been about is your kids. Trust that you have given them all they need to face this world and let them find themselves. They will come to you when they need you..trust me. My "adult" children and I are closer now than ever and it's annoying sometimes because its always something, but I wouldn't change it for the world. #loveisthemedicine
@@jvmcghee854 thank you 😊, I’ve learned how to let them GROW
There is way more to this story. So whatever is going on will likely continue. Hopefully she goes to anger management.
I’m not understanding why kamaro did not say anything about the boy in the house. Any mother would be upset about that. And we didn’t get clarity on her reaction so idk.
I've learned to let kids do what they want to do , guide them and let them know the consequences
Can COMPLETELY RELATE! Your kids don’t have anything to do with ur issues..go to therapy! How are you gonna fear losing someone but continue to do negative things to push them away?
Why would anybody wanna be honest with a parent that acts like this when you open up .
You are a great Mom! Just let go and trust what you have instilled into your beautiful young adults and you all will be fine. Totally trust God ! Amen 🙏
Beautiful comment by the daughter and the son mom you did a beautiful job loving
she doesn’t want them to leave because she doesn’t want to feel abandoned like she did as a child
You’re not gonna lose them. But you have to let them grow up and be their own person. They have their own lives and she doesn’t want to be alone.
“who’s mmm’n & ummm’n” 😂😂
I love how they talk to each other , like the love is there and the want to grow
Thank you bunches Karamo; definitely hit home. I seen myself in this episode no doubt. I have to young men 31 & 26 and did the samething without realizing. Please, continue to help families like us see that there is another way.
There is nothing wrong with being sad about your kids leaving. This is also a different phase in moms life. We don't get a manual on how u navigate thru the feelings. I know for me it's also about just missing my boy and although I'm so proud of the man he's become, I miss him being under the same roof.I miss seeing him every day, he's such a great person and i miss knowing a lot of what goes on in his life. This new role of parenting from a different position is something to adjust to. It's new to the parent and the child.
This is one of the best mothers. She brought up her children the right way, I believe the mother is afraid of lisinf her children
I’m sorry but I’m not that parent that’s gonna cry bc my kids don’t “need” me lol
Such a beautiful family!
Trust what she instilled in them..and now that they learn by failing.
I definitely understand the “MOM”. To the kids you will understand when you have kiddos of your own as you continue to grow and experience the world on your own you will ALWAYS need your mom
MAMA NEEDS A MAN THAT'S ALL..... 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 BUT SHE DID A GREAT JOB RAISING THEM🙏🏿❤️
My mom had 5 kids by the time she turned 22. She would ride us so badly. She would beat us for even looking at boys or talking to boys. It was even worse when she became an addict. Her moods and paranoia were thru the roof, she didnt trust us with any man. She even accused my sister of having an affair with her husband.
I was so terrified to even date that I was in my 20s before i lost my virginity, and when my mom found out, she cussed me slam out and called me a hoe. I tried to commit suicide after that, but I was unsuccessful.
But after that day I chose peace. I stopped going around her and my family and withdrew further into myself, always afraid to come out of my shell.
Im older now, and I recently started trying to repair my relationship with my mom. It's not easy because sometimes im a little resentful, but im trying.
Sending you healing energies. I’m glad you’re still here with us. Don’t give up on yourself. Like you said you were doing, continue to choose peace over anything.
GOD 1ST. PRAYER WORKS.. STAY AWAY FROM DRAMA, PROTECT YOUR PEACE.. THAT MOTHER WAS EVIL, AND ANGRY,, SHE HAS DONE THE WORST TO THAT GIRL, NOW TRYING TO MAKE UP SO THEY WON'T LEAVE HER FOR GOOD.. PEOPLE DON'T CHANGE THEY JUST GET OLDER.. WHEN YOUR YOUNG YOU DONT SEE IT, YOU DON'T SEE THE PAIN PARENTS HAVE CAUSED,, YOU MUST MAKE YOUR LIFE BEAUTIFUL AND EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH MAKE IT LOVE❤❤❤ GOD GIT HIS LOVE ALL OVER YOU.. LIVE❤
Just know 1 thing if it don't work out with your mother it's ok to move on
Girl let it go and move on. I tried that for years and I always ended back in the same place. Hurt by the person who is supposed to love you most. Stop, it’s mental insanity! You deserve to be happy even if that means excluding her from your life.
My mom was here . She still is . I love my momma through it all ..
he does a pretty good job of helping his guests & i love that his heart is in actually helping ppl… hopefully the budget next season will allow for a consistent therapist to be present & for lie detector tests instead of unlocked phones..
He didn’t help me do anything! He wanted to exploit my feelings for my kids not help us .. didn’t even offer any counseling ‼️🙄
@@candicreamwow so sad as a black man why would you do that
Yes parents out there!! Believe that you raised your kids right! Let them show you what they got because as parents, you never stop parenting even after 18. Help them when they fall just like when they were babies but let them make their own mistakes
The statements from the two audience members were amazing!! ❤❤ She def has a fear of being lone, momma gotta find a man or something cause your kids are going to leave the nest no matter what. Her behaviors are only going to push them further away.
With the mom saying to her daughter, “I can’t trust you anymore”, I feel like mom was trying to part ways from her daughter early so that it would hurt less if it became reality.
This is the best one yet. I had to do this with my mom as well. My grandma didn't raise my mom. It was an alcoholic home, angry. My grandma is a narcissist(faked degrees and all) so my mom had no education (it was also the 90s, I was 3 weeks late). She now acknowledges there were things she did that were not healthy for me or unfair as I was only 11 when my dad left. But I ACKNOWLEDGE she didn't know any better. I also have bad trauma and mental illness and she didn't ask for that either. My father never took accountability. My mom does and she sees it now clearly.
I love that this mother is genuinely trying and able to see herself ! She loves her kids lol
What a beautiful family. I’m not a crier but the mom was making me tear up you can tell she loves her children so much she’s just struggling on how to show it
Omg this episode hit home for me. I'm sat here crying like a baby 😢
Momma, you did good honey. You did good. Now it’s time for them to go and make their decisions. They will learn from their mistakes as they get older, but honey, you did good 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
You guys must not forget what the bible says ,a mother tender care cannot seize towards the child she bares
Beautiful mother with beautiful children ❤
Look at the woman and gentleman, she brought up, not draged up.... There mannerism is a shining example, she did her best, now is a new chapter ❤
I have to stop watching this at work. These last few have me in tears. 😭
Mama you raised two beautiful children!! Go enjoy life job well done!
I would go to the BEST AND FARAWAY COLLEGE THAT I CAN GO.. RUNNNNN.. THAT'S A MOMMY DEAREST.. THE ABUSIVE MOTHER.. THOSE GROWN CHILDREN CAN'T EVEN WHISPER.. THAT'S SAD.. YOU CAN SEE THE ABUSE THEY'VE ENDORED
I’m a empty nester also but I want the best for my children to be able to live the life God gave them is my comfort ❤
Beautiful children..easy fix..mom listen to your children. I know this feeling very well!
Am I the only one that thinks the mum being angry that her daughter had boy in the house when she wasn't home wasn't unreasonable, or am I missing the point? Lol. Also I love the fact the mum took accountability for her ways
I,2 when I came a empty nester. I didn't kno wat to do with Self. I was in fear to move on in life for not having the children n had locked out ppl for being hurt n misunderstood.
The son is totally giving me Prince vibes. From the way he speaks to his mouth… smile, eyes.
Very accountable woman!🙌🏾
I have 3 23 21 and 17 and I was strict and my children thanks me for being the way I was with them because together we've broken teen pregnancy we have all high school grads no felons and no gang ties. So everyone family is different
Agreed 100 percent this new generation crap with all this trauma this and abuse that. Sit down. Made me the woman I am
Imagine justifying someone who won’t even let her kids grow up 💀 my mom wasn’t strict and all of us turned out great being strict gets you nowhere expect like this lady
@@NaNa-ln6jg clearly you're not reading to understand everyone family is different Im justified because my 3 Mine the ones I gave birth to I was strict with came out great all grads no kids no felons no attitudes still don't curse in front of adults and thanks me on a daily so shut up. I said what I said with my perspective you turned out good great mines turned out awesome amazing will it work for everyone no which is why I said EVERY FAMILY DIFFERENT Jesus Christ thanks for your pointless comment
@@poohchi6205 well why no one asked the CHILD if the mom was home would you have had the guy over? Justified teen sex unnecessary problems that children just don't need but we're bad for wanting better for our children these children be babies and they want us to let them do all as they please gtho
People kill me so the world a way better place now that we allow children to dictate how they want to be raised any kind of discipline is abuse but them dying at these young ages because they out doing dumb shit is fine too they're just being kids right and it don't mean shit. Well mines made it strict and all and I'm proud y'all can keep this gentle parenting
Damn Lord made me be that kind of mom who can acknowledge when she not acting well. Oh Lord this is beautiful to see
Fear = False evidence appearing real… She raised very bright intelligent kids she now has to let go and live her life not saying to forget her kids bc they will always need her no matter what age they are she just needs to understand there young adults and cut the cord and be a supporting loving mom and be proud of her kids ❤
Thank you for understanding ❤ I love my kids and I’ve excepted the change of them not being in the house anymore 🥹
I’m going through something similar. I have an 19 year old, and 16 year old, i keep telling myself that my baby boy is going to be 18 soon and I’ll be left all alone. I also feel not needed anymore, my 19 year old never really wants to do things with me anymore. Like going to the movies, or out to eat. My youngest still do those things but i know it’s only cause he’s still young. I fear when he turns 18 all that will soon stop too. having children that their whole life they needed you came home from school with the biggest smiles hugs and kisses you feel so much loved where they’re smaller 😢
This made me cry so much! 😭😭😭😭 I understand the mother so much she’s so much like me, even if I don’t have kids I have family, but I’m like that I don’t wanna be alone and they’re the only thing that keeps me going, but now I understand just watching from this video to also just listen and not cause my family to much nagging or being to clingy. This is just so beautiful. 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️
Wow my daughters are 1 & 2 I got a long way to go but when they decide to start they life ima be sad too lol but happy to see them Living they life using the things I taught them and things they learned along the way . Now as a parent at 27 everything my mom taught helped me be the women & mother I am today . She seems like a good mom & her children seem like good kids she did something right she gotta let them do them so she can be proud and know she won't be lonely they will create families and she'll get grand babies 🥰
“F you, f him and f y’all baby”😂😂 shi crazy
this women is a great example of how it should be done the problem is that she has raised to beautiul children and now it time for her own peace but when ur 16 thats all u know i hope this gorgeouss lady finds her peace cuz she def deserve it and her kids to