You have a great way of explaining these things Kris. Keep up the good works for the Lord Himself. You will be greatly rewarded for spreading the words of our Lord and Savior and I'm glad there are people like you trying to educate others in this world!
Oh Kris -what a gift you are - your Wisdom and guidance according to Gods Word, has seen me through each and every lesson I watch. God Bless You Kris...XO
Whenever they tempting to anger, just look at them and smile and focus on positive things archieve ur life goals whenever they provoke u. This subdue them a lot, and also say NO to them more often, trust me. Let's continue standing strong and don't allow evil people to distract or belittle us👍
Your boundaries are for you. Rules are for others. Boundaries are supposed to dictate how you respond when others do (blank). Rules dictate what society will do to you if they do (blank). So no one can walk all over your boundaries. If you choose not to stand by your boundaries that's your decision. It's about who has the power. You have the power over you only. If someone comes up to your boundary, stick to your resolve to do what you said you would in that case. It does not have anything to do with what the other person does or does not do, only you.
I literally had to screen shot this because I have struggled with this so bad and prayed for so long begging God to get any lingering unforgiveness out of me , and I think what I am still holding on to and why I am so on guard towards this relationship and why I feel so much tension is because of needing to protect myself , that is what bothers me the most is wanting to be able to forgive and forget like what God did for us so we need to extend it towards others and that is what has been the most challenging for me, is that I can’t treat this person with ignorance anymore and can’t let my guard down around them even though I forgive them for their actions I have to have a wall up to establish peace but it’s just so obvious by how closed off and distant i am and the boundaries I have put up and completely changed my behavior around them and really sucks to have to be so affected by this situation especially how it’s impacted my spiritual health and wanting to be able to fully forgive someone with the whole heart and be at peace
@@breeherman4457 When you're in the fight for your life ,it isn't the time to stop and think about forgiveness. It's a fight or flight situation. Narcissist are only out for one thing: narcissistic supply. That narcissistic supply is cut off by you using Grey Rock Method, limited contact or no contact. The only language narcissist speak is the language of are they going to get narcissistic supply out of you or not. Narcissists notice real fast when their narcissistic supply is cut off because that's the only thing narcissists want.
I told my husband of 10 years that the next time he disrespects me, especially in front of our 2 year old that I was going to confront him. He told me to, “get off my lazy a** and do something.” This is all while I was waiting upstairs in our kitchen to ask him what he’d like for me to cook him for breakfast…. He came up the stairs and I slap-punched him right in his mouth and blood poured out. He then came to attack me and I Judo threw him over my shoulder and put him in a chokehold and told him that I meant it and he would never disrespect me again! (He completely forgot I practiced Judo for years before we met.) I told him that I will never let him take advantage of my forgiveness, love and kindness for weakness ever again. He still pokes jabs at me and I call him out for it. I don’t know what else to do. I’m stuck in this marriage and divorce is not an option. Just days before this happened I called the cops on him and had them remove him from the home for the night and then a week later he publicly humiliated me. Please pray for our family. I need it so badly.
Having married into a "Christian" narc family, I was slowly drained of all who I was. Their involvement in my husband's life nearly destroyed our marriage. I ultimately have had to go no-contact (thank you pandemic). The events of the past 4 years have really brought out the narcs in my life. I felt judged at every corner when I was just trying to do my best to get through each challenging moment that was thrown at me. My circle got smaller, but my sanity was saved and my journey with Christ got deeper. I forgive these people, but I will never trust them again.
I basically ignored 99% of pandemic restrictions and it exposed the narcissists in my life. They seemed threatened that I was a free man and not under their control.
Pray for me. I am married to a narcissist and the lectures and the verbal abuse, constant complaints and criticisms barrage me multiple times a day. I pray for a way of escape.
Hi, I finally eluded mine, 17yrs married to it and I finally did it... yeas it was tough and rocky and I made lotsa mistakes hard to deal with it times but... heck... I'm ok. 68yrs old now. Yay!
@@srw5611 They’re on a road you mustn’t walk with them. I divorced my husband for the only biblical reason, adultery. He, too, was a narcissist. Yet if your husband hasn’t committed adultery and you thus have no biblical reason to divorce, you still could separate from him and live your life on your own.
1. Love from afar - as far away as you can get! 2. Do not reward bad behavior, not even once. If the person who did wrong cannot apologize sincerely say, BYE! If it's a family member don't speak to them, except for yes, no. Same with a co-workers. Don't argue. Believe me they don't stay long if it's a one sided argument. No matter what they do to egg you on keep telling yourself, "I'm okay, they are just a distraction that isn't worth my energy. I am relaxing instead." 3. They only speak lies so no need to defend yourself. The ones right for you won't fall for their nonsense. Their accusations are actually confessions about who they are. It has nothing to do with you. Keep swimming sweetie. We got you. 4. A bully only needs you if you can supply them with what they need, once you no longer can you will be gone. Don't give in even one time. They don't have any interest in someone who won't do their dirty work. They will move on when you stay firm with your NO. 5. When they put another down DO NOT laugh and play along! Just stare at them or walk away. If they put you down because you didn't get it - so what. 6. If you feel confused in a relationship RUN! And don't waste energy trying to understand them. If you're sane, you will never understand why they do what they do. If you start keeping proof, RUN! 7. Make your happiness more important than being right. 8. Forgiveness isn't necessary if you don't judge someone as bad or wrong. They simply are as they are accept that fact and move forward! Acceptance alone heals. I know I've been there. Acceptance is like forgiveness. Forgiveness means you accept them or the situation for what it is. You aren't in denial. 9. Remember to trust yourself and if something seems off instead of staying around to see if you're right, run. You didn't have the thought - instinct- for nothing, remember that! 10. Never call them out or diagnose someone to their face. It'll do you no good. Keep your secret it'll keep you safe. 11. Depending on how long you've been in the relationship with one of these there could be a smear campaign. They could talk badly about you. I've been in this twice and the truly good people are still in my life. The other's who fell for their lies I don't want in my life anyway. 12. If you know someone is bad news don't share any good in your life with them. Do small talk if you must talk with them. If they ask questions answer simply. Don't ever explain they twist it and use it against you every time. 13. You are only in control of you. The only one you can change is you. In ten years from now that person you left will be exactly the same. You, however, can grow and blossom into true beauty! 14. Once out DON'T ever go back, no matter what! It's better to be alone then sick with them. 15. Any negativity you are feeling is because you want them to be different, you are actually resisting the truth. Acceptance is your way out of all that negativity. I wish you all the best!
@@lorettamcgee969 If you disagree, that is fine with me. Or if your experience is different from mine that's okay too. All I know is that whenever I accept someone for exactly who they are I am healed and am no longer tied to their abuse. And that's good enough for me. Blessings to you.
We should be forgiving. Christ forgave and we are supposed to be Christlike. That doesn't mean we tolerate or allow bad people in our lives. From Matthew 18 NASB: 32 Then summoning him, his lord *said to him, ‘You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’ 34 And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. 35 My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”
This is the only channel talking about narcissists that 100% doesnt sound like the speaker is just venting their own bitter experiences. She actually uses scripture in context, not to affirm or validate victimhood, but to guide listeners in how to respond in a wise and biblical way.
My wife and I just found this channel and I’ve been dealing with our two children who are narcissist for sure. We have already done everything that she has said we should do using the scriptures to validate that. However, it was very nice to hear it from her. What a wonderful change, praise God
@@bobbates7421 so blessed to have found her now that my adult son is living with me. He started up again last night with the belittling and excuse making of why he can’t stop his addictive behaviors. Have tried everything and know I’ve done my bloody best for him. Would like to see more addressed on adult children who do not take accountability.
I would appreciate the speaker stop saying "a true Christian"...our salvation has nothing to do with our understanding and perfect alignment with her advice. She shares Scripture properly and wise and helpful guidelines. However, "a true Christian" can have heard some of these things for the first time, not be following her advice and still be a "true Christian". Please don't make a suffering Christian doubt their faith, or their value in Christ, because they haven't been doing these things. Please separate the two.
Yes the best way against the narcissist is:no contact-ignore them and forgive them !!!!! I forgive my narcissist and all the mean people in my life!!!! Amen be GOD be with you all -wink from belgium !!!!!😉😉😇😇🥰🥰🙏🙏
The more you try to be nice to narcs or insanely jealous people, the more they will abuse you and indulge in smear campaign about you and you will end up hating them more and more. Best to keep them at a distance and try not to hate them.🙏
There is no way I could hate my ex Gf narc .I will never forget what she did to me.dont like her for it but I can't hate her she was also my HS SWEETIE a long time ago.
She has this one: What You Say vs.What the Narcissist Hears (the Narcissistic Twist) ua-cam.com/video/aMCW_-RTjiQ/v-deo.htmlsi=ZNcVy5ZjVrlzmGJa It's under "videos" It shows what they say outwardly and what they are actually up to inwardly. Hope this helps. Have a Blessed day.
Difficult because a Narc tends to jump around in conversations.. You really do not need to interact with them at all even when with them physically.. They will mostly speak of themselves.. Smile, nod, make little yes and no answers then make a polite excuse and walk away.. Detach your mind like they are detached from you. Its not personal, to them you are simply a pair of ears!! Try to imagine them as a cartoon character because that's what they are.. Nothing inside at all, just a noisy hollow vessel..
@@emmsue1053 yeah that's true. I guess i'm just looking for how to stay sane and loving in a convo while also setting boundaries and not succumbing to the manipulation.
People get a forgiveness situation confused with a self defense situation. If someone is going to try and hit me in my face I'm not going to stand there thinking 'I forgive you' because I'm not an idiot. In the same way if I know someone is a narcissist, I'm not going to place myself in front of that person to be abused. Even the Apostle Paul ran away from people when he was abused. God freed the Apostle Peter from prison by sending an angel to do a prison break. God wasn't sitting there on the throne saying 'You know what Peter and Paul? Why don't you just forgive your abusers?' Modern day Christianity is full of narcissist who gaslight with scripture because they want to abuse you. Churches are full of flying monkeys and narcissists these days. That's why I don't attend church anymore.
@@joyelle7578 JESUS did not tolerate the self righteousness and pride of the Pharisees/Sanhedrin, nor did JESUS tolerate Peter His disciple when Peter tried to turn JESUS away from His Divine mission. JESUS said to Peter, “Get behind Me satan”. JESUS told the unbelievers (in Him), you are of your father the devil. JESUS said, “If GOD were your father, you would love Me”.
Let me tell you, Kriss! I'm been going to Therapy for many years with a couple of different therapists and they were not getting my problem solved!!!! Just a few weeks with you and my life is beginning to show a chance and people have noticed!!! I'm sEnding prayers up for you right now to let you know, through God working through you, I'm baby stepping into becoming alive again after 20+ abuse. Thank you. Please don't leave us that need Gods teaching through you and UA-cam. Thank you with all my heart. Here is a smile for you that I haven't been able to do for a very long time🤗Your faithful follower, " Miss Joy" Bradford😇🙏
I appreciate all you said but rather than saying 'the true Christian '. You need to say the mature Christian. Many true Christians do not have the Spiritual maturity to always respond in the right way. But they are true Christians that have trusted I Christ alone for their salvation.
I believe Kris is saying "wise Christians" "true Christian" rather than "mature Christian" because she is contrasting the truth against the false doctrine of wolves in sheeps' clothing, and she is speaking against this false accusation: "If you were a true Christian, you would..." Obviously, when it comes to these traits, we all have room to grow in the grace and knowledge of God.
Interesting approach to dealing with a narcissist, when they start prejudging you with their manipulation, just stand there and look at them.. Silently. Drives them crazy..
Thank you for this message that popped up under a video I was watching about narcissistic abuse. My in laws are narcissistic at worst and emotionally immature at best. I have a lot of anger towards them because most of the issues I have had in my marriage is tied to them and how they devalued my husband as a child. He is working on it, making progress and slowly seeing it for himself after he survived a hemorrhagic stroke 6 years ago, which has been a blessing from God. Anyone that reads this, please pray for me to forgive them and have patience while my husband heals from their abuse. I lean on God's promises daily to get through because I don't think I'll ever have a healthy & happy marriage in this life & we still potentially have many years ahead of us, we're 50 & 49 and have been married since teenagers. Thank you
@@stitchinginthebarn8307 I understand your pain and dilemma. We want to forgive it's in our nature. I struggled to. But everyday I ask Jesus to help me forgive. And through my prayers to Jesus I remind myself of how he was betrayed, lied too, tortured till His death, and yet Jesus forgave them all. So I tell myself if Jesus forgave the horrible things inflicted on him, well certainly I can forgive my ex husband, I can forgive others who have deeply hurt me as well. I don't know but this has helped me to forgive and let it go. I will pray for you as well. God bless you. 🙏🏻✝️💜🙏🏻
Prayers goes out to the lady that said her husband is a narcissist god is on the way to you escape from yhe abuse . Provbes 3 verse 5 through 6 Trust in the Lord he shall direct your path 🙏🙏🙏.
Thank you, I remember all the times I wanted to resolve things and couldn't because of the resistance of the other party. The reason I hung in there so long was because I had love and couldn't stand the thought that I might be hurting someone. When I walked away it was with grief that I had to do it. It was not to punish them or change them, it was to protect my own walk with Christ after realizing I was having no impact or means of resolving things. God clearly states to get away from those who are wicked because they WILL influence us even if only to enable them in the presence of others who are also learning their ways.
And sometimes they really aren't evil. I feel degrees of this in an outreach ministry I may have to walk away from as the leader demeans my methods and literature I hand out to evangelize people. Example calling my "Daily Bread" 90 Day Devotionals "Daily Crumbs". I know in my heart God reaches people through both of us but the constant correction really hinders the Holy Spirit guiding me and my unique gifts and hand outs. Good to share that here I'm keeping quiet at church so as not to be called a divisive person.
@@bryguy8203 Amen, God has many personalities in His church and all are needed. We cannot have formulas for evangelism because we don't know that the Holy Spirit may be doing and His ways are limitless. 1 Corinthians 12:15-26 15 If the foot says, “Because I am not a hand, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason any less a part of the body. 16 And if the ear says, “Because I am not an eye, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason any less a part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole body were hearing, where would the sense of smell be? 18 But now God has arranged the parts, each one of them in the body, just as He desired. 19 If they were all one part, where would the body be? 20 But now there are many parts, but one body. 21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; or again, the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” 22 On the contrary, it is much truer that the parts of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary; 23 and those parts of the body which we consider less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor, and our less presentable parts become much more presentable, 24 whereas our more presentable parts have no need of it. But God has so composed the body, giving more abundant honor to that part which lacked, 25 so that there may be no division in the body, but that the parts may have the same care for one another. 26 And if one part of the body suffers, all the parts suffer with it; if a part is honored, all the parts rejoice with it."
Thank you Kris for this teaching. I have suffered immensely at the hand of a narcissistic minister. I tried to be loving, kind and agreeable, which seems impossible when you are the abused. I had to block numbers and emails to get peace. So grateful God had me hold my mouth and put up healthy boundaries. They are parasitic freeloaders! So blessed by your podcast!
Narcissist never give up they always want control over you no matter how you do you handle them makes no difference even when you give them their way they’re relentless they don’t care. There’s nothing there. They’re an empty shell there just for show. They enjoy making you uncomfortable they enjoy making you unhappy. They enjoy taking whatever you love away from you, they just an empty shell is the best way I can describe them. I don’t know anyway to stop them they’re unstoppable. And that’s the truth.
Everything you say I have experienced with my wife,, it's very sickening,, Marie I'm 45yo male if you ever like a chat, I'm interested to see if two empath would get along really well ,, all friendly of course, 😊
@@mariacompton1416 you cannot save yourself from a nation of domestic terrorists. They need to be held accountable and go behind bars, and it should all start with the terrorist in the White House.
Yes. The Church of all places basically looks away. And sadly some of the people leading us are narcissistic. They are given such honorific titles. People are taught "Don't touch God's anointed" in a controlling, non-Biblica way 😢 Thank you Kris ♥️
I used to get angry cry and get disrespectful, I realize that my husband would actually take joy in my hurt and turn it around and say it's me, every since I've started praying hard, I don't respond that way and it confuses him, I don't engage any awful things he says anymore, I smile and say thank you God! And I say! Thank you for your negative words I'll take them! Now he doesn't continue to keep provoking me! He stops! I'm waiting on the day I get released from him! Right now I'm here to pass the test! GOD says love your enemies even the one that is your husband! The enemy is using him to get to me and one day GOD will have enough
@@ExpectantHarvest 2 Timothy 3:1-5 foretold a narcissistic society and the recommended course of action is to turn away from such ones...no contact...we are to judge righteously and to test the spirits, if we observe such characteristics it is not labelling but an acknowledging....God is not all forgiving, he forgives those that acknowledge their sin, seek to be forgiven of wrongs committed, and a changed attitude and behaviour demonstrated by action.(otherwise there is no forgiveness extended to them by Him he deems them wicked worthy of his wrath)...if such does not occur we are to turn away from such people (narcs) and leave vengeance to God and not seek it ourselves, to be peaceable with all men as far as it depends upon us, no contact is not holding a grudge it is acknowledgement that this person (narc) is neither sorry, refuses to acknowledge harm done and no desire or demonstration of change, we are commanded to love our fellowman as ourself, but first we must recognize our worth and love ourselves in order to love our fellowman. Facilitating a vicious cycle of abuse to oneself is not loving to ourselves or God....and the first command is to love our God with our whole mind heart and soul, this is not possible when in the all consuming vicious cyclic narc abuse...which destroys Gods temple:heart mind and soul ..to the contrary it is the recognition of our worth (love of self) that will end this abuse, NO CONTACT.
I believe the church taught us the wrong concept of forgiveness and this has enabled much of our abuse.....the effect being that by such forgiveness as they taught enabled many of us to be preyed upon, they led us like lambs to the slaughter....their forgiveness=tolerance of evil behavior, while scripturally we are not to be tolerant of such...and the church is led by such men that benefit from such wrong teaching on forgiveness what it truly is and what it entails....the powers that be not only control govts but also the churches (501c3) churches teach tolerance, our societies become more lawless, his makes $$$ for legal sector judges attorneys etc and their prisons for profit....there is no money to be made out of a healthy happy society...
@@eyeswideopen3304 The best talk on Forgiveness is by Jesse Lee - but I must realize I became what I hated - I became my mother - she could not help herself -she had the same evil spirit from her mother - I chose to go and forgive her and then my father for not protecting me from her - and then I could return to the Father - anyone who is angry, worried, afraid, sad, emotional is not of God - I spent over 16.5 years in Churches that lied so much to me and denied the truth of what Jesus really did
One thing to remember is that only God can save someone. If you willingly stay in the path of a destructive person in some sort of effort to minister to them, check your ego. God doesnt need you to be abused to change that person. Pray for their blessing. God blesses people in all kind of ways including correction and consequences. And if someone is hurting you then their blessing has nothing to do with you.
I've heard many teachers explain that the abused person who acts as an enabler has been blinded and is trapped in a form of idolatry. I believe in many cases that is the case.
Thank you Kris. This video is definitely affirming that I am proceeding correctly. I appreciate the Bible verses too. The Word is a guide for life. God bless you and everyone on this channel.✝️❤️🙏🕊️🦅
Ok, after listening to this brilliant, enlightened woman for just the first minute, I can say that we NEED her message!!! Having barely survived the wiles of a narcissist for about five years, where he wreaked HAVOC on the lives of my poor children and I, I can say WE NEED HER!!! BTW this narcissist man was always reading his Bible and he said he was on his SEVENTH time reading it!! In reality, he used it as a shield to try to fool others!!
Your teaching is both heartful and anointed!! Thank you for sharing this gift of enlightenment!! I will be sharing this and revisiting this, often!! God Bless!! Glory to God!!
I didn't realize that being nice was actually its own form of controlling or manipulation. I was "nice" expecting a positive outcome. THAT was called "dysfunctional pleasing" in hopes of a good outcome. It took years of counseling to come out of that. It also took years for me to realize that I was trying to "control or manipulate" a particular outcome by my niceness. Once I learned that, it took years of practice to learn how to be nice but firm and how to distance myself from the narcissist and still have just enough contact as to not invite their crap into MY life. Thanks for your videos. It gives me boosts of confidence when I need it!
Narcs usually don’t respond well to being called out… they usually rage, calling you everything but your monkey’s uncle. Never admitting what they’ve done. If the narc lives with you, that’s a dangerous thing to do…could be.
I called out my narc mother and man she attacked me big time. My golden siblings, son and grand babies were all turned against me. She has always called me crazy, but now has destroyed my relationships. Oh well, it's their loss.
I have to say Amen here. I'm a mix of people pleaser with narcissistic traits. You're videos showed me a mirror to my soul that is setting me free even though change is hard and I fell a lot. Knowing the truth created in me a genuine desire to repent but it takes time to get ride of all the old habits. The Holy Spirit reminds me your teachings as I go back so I can correct the course immediately. Now I have hope, God bless you!
🤦🏽♀️The strategy, and endurance to navigate through all of this is so difficult and overwhelming 😢. I pray for change, healing and their desire to do, be and want better.
Kris, u r absolutely FABBBULOUS! New Christian subscriber here. After 24 yrs of Marriage to a Narcissist, n 25 yrs of FREEDOM I feel happy! ☺️ However, I hv 2 Narcissists for Sons, (aged 30 n 37) who still tear my heart out, tear it to shreds, n spit it out! I needed to hear exactly what u said in todays’s video. THANK U SOOOOO MUCH, n greetings fm Sydney, Australia 🇦🇺🐨🦘🪼 God Bless u n ur work! 🙏🙏🙏😘😘😘✝️✝️✝️
@luisa. I am so sorry for all your suffering. I have one narcissistic granddaughter. Very hard situation. Daughter and other granddaughter gaslighted. Blame me for what I notice. I have been called a narcissist 🤔
@Margaret - thank u for ur very kind reply Margaret! U r a sweetheart! ❤ On top of everything I hv suffered … Just this week I was told too, that “I am the Narcissist” 🤢🤮 unbelievable! I’m soooo sorry for u too n wt u r enduring! With ur daughter n grand daughters! Yes, I’m just gaslighted again too! This time I’m going to IGNORE his 37th Birthday just like he IGNORES ME! But it KILLS ME to do this! 🤦♀️🤷♀️😮 All the best to u Margaret! 🙏🙏🙏
@@luisamedici5890Yes Ignoring may save our mental health. It is hard in one way, but you could consider it being the only path to take in order to preserve your sanity ,😢🙏🏼
Well said! The worst is the 'Christian' narcissist with special gifts i.e. prophesy who does prophesies one day and go into a narcissistic rage the next day, and continue thereafter as if nothing had ever happened. I am not going to judge if God can truly use someone like this as I believe God can use a disillusioned turtle to advance the Kingdom of God, but I for one do not trust an individual with such erratic and abusive behaviour and seriously question if God is glorified in the broader spectrum of things. What is even more disturbing is that the narcissist's partner has become so desensitized to his abusive and vulgar behaviour that she is currently his biggest enabler.
I have been struggling with continuing on in life, all of these topics I experienced again yesterday evening and last night. I sincerely appreciate this video bc it has helped me to understand things, and when I understand things then I have clarity. When there is clarity then the depression, panic and hopelessness disappear.
I knew that God sees everything and would eventually take care of my situation, but I didn’t understand what my part was in all of this, as far as how much should I tolerate. I had never heard of a Narcissist or Narcissistic behavior, so I stayed in it for 36 years and then God came to teach and rescue me. Praise the Lord!
I just can't believe how relevant every book and video on this topic has been relevant in my relationship with my wife. I literally get the silent treatment for days when something needs to be addressed, even when there is nothing hostile about the conversation. I am accused of starting arguments that she clearly starts. I love her and very concern because of the positions we hold. It has been brutal for me but God keeps me strong, and I believe he is teaching me to be stronger. I learned about radical acceptance, basically asking the question who will I become if she never changes. We must all continue to Love, but stand in integrity. It has been good to hear someone else say it. When you said "back to fairy land and no acknowledgement of wrong doing", you were so accurate. Crazy how often I deal with that. I have to document and record certain things just to verify to myself that it actually happened the way I heard it. Things get so twisted to eventually blame me for everything. I have had to study so much on the narc word, which I don't even like saying. People have an extreme negative opinion about it. When you live with a love one dealing with such, trust me, I verified in more ways than one, you have to be anchored in God to survive it. I knew nothing about this topic until a counselor suggested that I study it over 10 years ago, based on what I was experiencing daily. I discovered I was very codependent at the time. Many heated arguments with wife, but I have always been the voice of reason behind getting additional help and moving forward. Help is always rejected, and there are always threats of leaving. I just stay focused on what I know God has promised for us. I am learning to let Him work out the details. Great advice on forgiveness. You are the first that I have heard take a strong biblical approach. Thank You for stating that God will fight our battles and to always seek peace.
With all the confusion, twisting and the fact that you have to live hypervigilant by documenting I wonder what is keeping you there with so much instability and if this is a healthy place for you to be? Do you think our loving merciful Father would want you to just absorb such behavior?
@@LadyBug31705 Here is the kicker. Yep. “Turn to me all who are heavily burden”. Everything doesn’t always work out the same, but some things will strengthen you and change your identity for the better. But you can’t do it by yourself. There are a couple of movies that used to annoy me a little, but are true. Love Dare and War Room. Pray hard about your relationships and see if God will answer. It is not that God holds us hostage, but he is moved by what we fight for in His name.
This was one of the best of Kris' videos. Very, very helpful. The content is getting more refined to divide truth and do battle in the unseen realm. So very thankful! It's exactly what I needed to navigate a very toxic and twisted situation I've been bound up in for a very long time. It's time to leave and shake off the dust.
Thank you so so much! I've been troubled and stuck dealing with 2 family members who are narcissists. I'm stuck no longer! Because of you, my life is going to change for the best. I'm going to focus on all the good people in my life who love me. 🙏🏿
My mother was the narcissist in my life, and I took the 5th commandment literally. It was only a year or so before she died that I came to understand that I am to honor the position of a parent, not necessarily the particular parent. If only I had learned that when I was younger, I could have set boundaries earlier. Perhaps. A narcissistic parent gets to start the toxicity from the child's earliest understandings so can really skew their sense of reality.
I’m so excited to see this! This is explaining 40 years of mental and emotional abuse from an older sibling. We are both Christian and over the years I couldn’t understand why our relationship didn’t evolve into a caring relationship . Of course I would also blame myself until I couldn’t justify their behavior anymore. Thank you God Im getting more and more free listening to your videos!
My father is a narcissist and I want to seek healing so that I stop the cycle and not marry a man like my dad or raise my children with the destructive patterns like the ones I was raised with
I recently set a boundary with a friend l have known for years because within just of every interaction she was lighting into me of her opinions of my health. I am under doctors care for what she is so adamant about. But as you can imagine with her not stopping and her just being my friend again it was horrible getting attacked every time. I had never told her before that no more seeing each other or texting until you decide to stop it. But l felt the Lord saying do it as you said let them suffer the consequences for their behavior. I have sought council for my godly older friend and she agreed that l was right in stopping our friendship until she apologizes and does talk about it after. Before all this started l said l will leave our lunches and hang up on you when you light into me because l want you to see how often you do this. I think that confrontation was the beginning of our break.
Perhaps instead of using “ 11:49 “true Christian” you could use “mature Christian “. I’m a true Christian but I struggle with how to deal with this person.
I so agree, we are human and we make all kinds of mistakes, we come from dust thank God for grace… I think she has a lot of wisdom and I’m thankful for the scriptures that she’s putting out there, but I was very alarmed by her use of the words “ true Christians”
@LindyWYID I understand but we have to remember no one os always going to say and do all of the perfect things all of the time and that she is human also and her intentions are always pure and she's mostly right about most things. ❤️ 💙 I say this in love just so we ALL can keep that in mind 🤍
I've had to learn all of this the hard way. But, I did learn it😀👍I watched tons of narc videos to break the trauma bond , and when I did, I realized through Kris, Tim Fletcher, James Kaddish, Pastor Mark Driscoll, and Steve Deace on Blazetv, to start to look at the world through a Biblical worldview. I had been SO IMMERSED in the worldly Worldview. I also set a goal to read the entire Bible this year, and it has helped me see things, and set a no contact boundary with my x husband who is a psychopathic ," nice" narcissist. I'm so thankful God led me out of bondage into freedom. It hasn't been easy, but it is so much better to be able to have a relationship with Jesus, and grow- even through trials and pain He is Always with me, and He NEVER manipulates or Lies😀!! God IS Good!!
@elizabethy2912 try listening thru the Bible in a year ...:) Dab/Daily Audio Bible is a free app and a website. Pastor Brian is an amazing story-teller.. and teacher. God bless you.
I always love to say that Biblical Love is not squishy; meaning lovely-dovey, accepting of EVERYTHING, etc. It is in fact truth oriented, and lesson-learning oriented I believe. Speaking truth in love to others even if it may offend them.
If only you knew how much I needed to see this video. I've been trapped in a toxic relationship for nearly a decade and only recognized my partner's narcissism three years ago. I've come across plenty of secular advice on handling narcissists, but as a Christian, it never quite resonated with me. I've had countless conversations with my mother about my duty as a Christian to stay with my wife (the narcissist) and her daughter, believing that God wouldn't want me to leave them. Financially, their lives would be challenging without me. This internal struggle has been a heavy burden-wanting to leave but feeling obligated to stay because of my convictions. I feel particularly guilty about our daughter, whom I've raised since she was five, and the impact it would have on her. This video has offered a new perspective, though I still wrestle with the idea of leaving them because of my faith. Thank you so much for sharing these words; I desperately needed a Christian perspective on dealing with a narcissist.
This is how Holy Spirit instructed me. "May God judge between you and me, may God avenge me of the wrong you have done to me, my hand shall not touch you. I release the offense into the Hand of The Big Angel to accomplish The Justice, The Lord Will Confirm. The Lord rebuke the wicked. REPENT. Let go of hate, let go of anger, let go of fear. Love Is The Answer. Walk In Love it is the Solid Rock.
Thank you for sharing this! The Lord is revealing bit by bit, what I have not understood before, although I have come a long way already. My mother caused a lot of damage and now after her passing, a lot is getting sorted out. I truly appreciate having actual scripture quoted. As it needs to be based on God's word. Blessings to you and love to all those that are struggling and healing from the pain others have caused. God does not stay silent and He is with us🙏
Soooo.... Interesting ..... Very ... Very ... I don't have words to describe that how much I loved listening this video. God bless you more my dear Kris.
Thank you SO much for sharing this! I deal with a covert narcissistic elderly mother. I am an only child and am her ride to the store on a weekly basis. Dealing with her can be a challenge! This insight is very helpful. Blessings and Shalom! ❤
Thank you Kris! As a born again believer, I struggle with the guilt that can come with dealing with my mom and trying to show kindness without becoming a doormat. Your videos have been a great help and blessing. Thank you for what you do and may Yahweh continue to bless you and your family. 😊🙏❤
The thing a narcissist can’t handle is being ignored. Yes they’ll come at you with insults after you’ve ignored the gas lighting, they’ll call you names & ghost you for several days afterwards, they’re really just a brat child in an adults body. They love to dish it out but can’t take it from anyone else. So I continue to pray for him & bless him & that opens the door for God to deal with him & also doing that helps me to forgive the disrespectful & ungrateful behaviour.
I wish narcissist could self-reflect and be accountable and responsible for themselves and forgive themselves instead of being in denial and blaming others for issues that they themselves created
Xlnt ideas - well stated. Most churches, pastors and Christians teach ideas contrary to your wisdom. While I value your teaching, I have no desire to join a church family as all I ever experienced when I mentioned narcissistic abuse against me was gaslighting and blame that I was responsible for all or most of the abuser's behavior and that I needed to model Christian love. I still struggle with forgiveness but I choose to see the narcissist as a pile of dumpster debris who simply needs to be permanently removed from my life.
Hallelujah 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 complete forgiveness doesn't mean you condone what happened it doesn't mean there won't be GOD'S justice and it doesn't mean you have to stay around that person but complete forgiveness sets u free I totally completely come in agreement with this video thank you thank u thank u 4 making it and giving a thorough explanation of how to deal effectively with the circumstances and situations that encountering a narcissist occurs without it damaging our souls and spirits in the process of dealing and responding to the trouble a narcissist causes. I appreciate you and this video thank you thank you In JESUS CHRIST'S GREAT and MIGHTY NUCLEAR NAME NAME above All other NAMES in whom ALL CREATION is immediately and permanently subject to HIM it is written it is FINISHED Hallelujah SELAH
Im a quiet guy, I do not deal with narcissists, I do not fight useless battles, I wish not to be provoked for I believe Jesus gave me the right to be God's son so I am a warrior, I will fight the good fight and silence is part of it.
Watching these videos re this topic again is so very helpful. So, Thank You, Kris. It's making a great deal of sense to many of us, I'm sure. I hope you are really blessed for doing this. ❤❤ I know a christian lady, single like myself, vulnerable in various ways too, but whose strong tendency to be dominating, manipulative and actually quite aggressive, has caused a considerable amount of stress to several Christians in the church we were all in. There were times when I actually became demonically oppressed after spending time with this person. Now, that was bad enough, but the pastor's wife (and the wife of one of the Elders) wanted me to be 'friends' with her (and her friend who was also stressful to deal with, but not as aggressive). Result: I eventually had to leave that church (for that & other good reasons). But, years later, that (now retired) pastor's wife still wants/expects me to be closely associated with this lady, I believe, but I am no longer so vulnerable or ignorant. I'm free now. And I'm no longer caught up with this very unhealthy situation. ** I really believe we really need to be aware of this issue, as it's very common, in churches too. I sincerely believe the Lord does not want anyone to be manipulated or forced to be closely involved with people who refuse to take responsibility for their choices and behaviour, and who, for years even, continue to oppress and use others in certain ways (unless you just can't get away, for certain reasons). And if others try to force us to be closely involved with people doing this, we don't have to allow them to do that to us either. We can certainly love people with this problem, but we DO need to set very strong boundaries etc, and ONLY do what we believe is right, and really WANT to do. You need to take care of yourself on this respect especially if you are vulnerable yourself. No one has the right to bully or force us. God wants us to be free. Hope that helps. Sorry for long comment. ❤❤❤
Well I didn’t jerk my integrity and that’s what he constantly uses against me to show others how horrible of a person I am. when you are with a toxic person it makes you do things against your character. I just wanted to be loved. I didn’t mean to do anything wrong. I just wanted love. And now that we’re divorced he is still verbally abusive. And he’s turned our two oldest boys against me with those lies. Yet I have peace that God is going to restore my relationship with my boys. I love them so much.
Kris, I love your teachings! It’s very challenging, though still very possible, when it’s one’s offspring who’ve been influenced by the world which allows, enables and entitles. Very sad and challenging esp. when they’ve been raised in the church. ❤😊
I had to completely disconnect from my narcissist sister, she has been abusive my whole life and my mental and physical health has suffered terribly because of the abuse, it was a necessity to remove her from my life , I don’t let myself feel hate or bitterness towards her but I just couldn’t let her cause any more damage. I was taught in Catholic schools to absorb the abuse and was always told retaliation made me worse than the instigators of the abuse. Took me over 30 years to acquire enough self worth to realise I didn’t have to put up with being treated like garbage by my sister or people at school and following that the workplace.
Sometimes this is a family member who you are not just going to discard. This calls for heavenly discernment of when and how to interact. - much love to you all!!!!!
@@yvettebenito7142 Agreed. My sister was abusing my mother a couple years ago. She was threatening to kill herself, every time she didn't get her way. Well. I kicked her out of my house, firstly. And secondly, I taught my mother to stand up to her, and not talk to her until she started to change. And it worked. My sister started off on the road to recovery from then on. Had some big bumps. But tough love, is love.
@@yvettebenito7142 God is good. You'll get through this. I'm sorry you have to deal with it. It's hard. And it sucks. That really sounds like the sort of narcissism my sister was going through. She was really bad. She literally would get stuck looking in mirrors. But the manipulation...that was the worst. And my mom was someone who suffered a lot of abuse as a child, and saw other people suffer. She couldn't do it, herself. But your daughter can't do that to you. She can't use and abuse you. That's not okay. And whatever happens, you have to accept it is her choice. She is doing this. This doesn't need to be a permanent thing. It just needs to break the cycle. God can get you and your daughter through this. In Jesus name, Amen.
@@JensMorrison yesss Amen 🙏🏽 I too suffered several abuses in my childhood and God saved me - my mom had attempted suicide and I found her so this was truly the most painful experience BUT GOD is showing me by knowledge through these videos, comments like yours, and my Godfamily. Also learning about idols - and how our.children can be our idols. Thank you blessings and so glad your sister sought help and is better. Praise God!
Warning others of sin is gracious and merciful. It is up to the individual or Narcisst to choose to repent. If they fail to heed God's word and warning, they will be disciplined by the Almighty. Mic drop....end of story.
Amazing insight and wisdom.. I thank God for your Ministry. I wish you would have generalized the criteria and not limit it to a male and female romantic relationships because as you've said always - it's everywhere!
FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide
You have a great way of explaining these things Kris. Keep up the good works for the Lord Himself. You will be greatly rewarded for spreading the words of our Lord and Savior and I'm glad there are people like you trying to educate others in this world!
SO good to hear and STAND WITH God's Word so both are blessed- one set free & the other in God's care alone. Will pass this on.
Amen 🙏🏽
Oh Kris -what a gift you are - your Wisdom and guidance according to Gods Word, has seen me through each and every lesson I watch. God Bless You Kris...XO
@@Kris_Reece Amen. Should, shouldn't, ask the Lord, and LISTEN. To love.
A narcissist will provoke and provoke a person to wrath.
and then point the finger at you when you've had enough.
Whenever they tempting to anger, just look at them and smile and focus on positive things archieve ur life goals whenever they provoke u. This subdue them a lot, and also say NO to them more often, trust me. Let's continue standing strong and don't allow evil people to distract or belittle us👍
A narcissist is someone who steps all over your boundaries and thinks nothing of it.
Actually, some do think something...they think it's funny.
Your boundaries are for you. Rules are for others. Boundaries are supposed to dictate how you respond when others do (blank). Rules dictate what society will do to you if they do (blank). So no one can walk all over your boundaries. If you choose not to stand by your boundaries that's your decision.
It's about who has the power. You have the power over you only. If someone comes up to your boundary, stick to your resolve to do what you said you would in that case. It does not have anything to do with what the other person does or does not do, only you.
@@gracefulkimberella Thanks
@@gracefulkimberellaTo an extent, yes.
@@gracefulkimberella I love how you phrased this very significant truth! 👍❣️
REMEMBER::: Satan is the original narcissist.
@@graceisamazing5493 Exactly
Agree
Great point!
You are right it is his pride that will have him in Hell.
Good point.
If someone wants to be evil, let them and walk away.
Dealing with a narcissist isn't a forgiveness situation, it's a self defense situation.
One influencer posted that if you you don’t get offended you have nothing to forgive. Living unoffended is the key!!
I literally had to screen shot this because I have struggled with this so bad and prayed for so long begging God to get any lingering unforgiveness out of me , and I think what I am still holding on to and why I am so on guard towards this relationship and why I feel so much tension is because of needing to protect myself , that is what bothers me the most is wanting to be able to forgive and forget like what God did for us so we need to extend it towards others and that is what has been the most challenging for me, is that I can’t treat this person with ignorance anymore and can’t let my guard down around them even though I forgive them for their actions I have to have a wall up to establish peace but it’s just so obvious by how closed off and distant i am and the boundaries I have put up and completely changed my behavior around them and really sucks to have to be so affected by this situation especially how it’s impacted my spiritual health and wanting to be able to fully forgive someone with the whole heart and be at peace
@@breeherman4457 When you're in the fight for your life ,it isn't the time to stop and think about forgiveness. It's a fight or flight situation. Narcissist are only out for one thing: narcissistic supply. That narcissistic supply is cut off by you using Grey Rock Method, limited contact or no contact. The only language narcissist speak is the language of are they going to get narcissistic supply out of you or not. Narcissists notice real fast when their narcissistic supply is cut off because that's the only thing narcissists want.
I told my husband of 10 years that the next time he disrespects me, especially in front of our 2 year old that I was going to confront him.
He told me to, “get off my lazy a** and do something.” This is all while I was waiting upstairs in our kitchen to ask him what he’d like for me to cook him for breakfast….
He came up the stairs and I slap-punched him right in his mouth and blood poured out. He then came to attack me and I Judo threw him over my shoulder and put him in a chokehold and told him that I meant it and he would never disrespect me again! (He completely forgot I practiced Judo for years before we met.)
I told him that I will never let him take advantage of my forgiveness, love and kindness for weakness ever again.
He still pokes jabs at me and I call him out for it. I don’t know what else to do. I’m stuck in this marriage and divorce is not an option. Just days before this happened I called the cops on him and had them remove him from the home for the night and then a week later he publicly humiliated me.
Please pray for our family. I need it so badly.
God will help you to forgive.
Having married into a "Christian" narc family, I was slowly drained of all who I was. Their involvement in my husband's life nearly destroyed our marriage. I ultimately have had to go no-contact (thank you pandemic). The events of the past 4 years have really brought out the narcs in my life. I felt judged at every corner when I was just trying to do my best to get through each challenging moment that was thrown at me. My circle got smaller, but my sanity was saved and my journey with Christ got deeper. I forgive these people, but I will never trust them again.
I basically ignored 99% of pandemic restrictions and it exposed the narcissists in my life. They seemed threatened that I was a free man and not under their control.
AMEN
@@s.s.8029 well put!
@@s.s.8029 “my circle got smaller”
I can relate to that. I wish I’d done that earlier in life. Better late than never
When they are unable to manipulate u, they turn to ur partner (spouse), or other close friends to go against u, let's stay strong overcome them. 👍
Pray for me. I am married to a narcissist and the lectures and the verbal abuse, constant complaints and criticisms barrage me multiple times a day. I pray for a way of escape.
Hi, I finally eluded mine, 17yrs married to it and I finally did it... yeas it was tough and rocky and I made lotsa mistakes hard to deal with it times but... heck... I'm ok. 68yrs old now. Yay!
@@srw5611 They’re on a road you mustn’t walk with them.
I divorced my husband for the only biblical reason, adultery. He, too, was a narcissist.
Yet if your husband hasn’t committed adultery and you thus have no biblical reason to divorce, you still could separate from him and live your life on your own.
Same
@@7hilladelphia congratulations. But, how about you show a bit of empathy for the original poster. All the best.
Run away!! Plan your escape wisely but run!!
1. Love from afar - as far away as you can get!
2. Do not reward bad behavior, not even once. If the person who did wrong cannot apologize sincerely say, BYE! If it's a family member don't speak to them, except for yes, no. Same with a co-workers. Don't argue. Believe me they don't stay long if it's a one sided argument. No matter what they do to egg you on keep telling yourself, "I'm okay, they are just a distraction that isn't worth my energy. I am relaxing instead."
3. They only speak lies so no need to defend yourself. The ones right for you won't fall for their nonsense. Their accusations are actually confessions about who they are. It has nothing to do with you. Keep swimming sweetie. We got you.
4. A bully only needs you if you can supply them with what they need, once you no longer can you will be gone. Don't give in even one time. They don't have any interest in someone who won't do their dirty work. They will move on when you stay firm with your NO.
5. When they put another down DO NOT laugh and play along! Just stare at them or walk away. If they put you down because you didn't get it - so what.
6. If you feel confused in a relationship RUN! And don't waste energy trying to understand them. If you're sane, you will never understand why they do what they do. If you start keeping proof, RUN!
7. Make your happiness more important than being right.
8. Forgiveness isn't necessary if you don't judge someone as bad or wrong. They simply are as they are accept that fact and move forward! Acceptance alone heals. I know I've been there. Acceptance is like forgiveness. Forgiveness means you accept them or the situation for what it is. You aren't in denial.
9. Remember to trust yourself and if something seems off instead of staying around to see if you're right, run. You didn't have the thought - instinct- for nothing, remember that!
10. Never call them out or diagnose someone to their face. It'll do you no good. Keep your secret it'll keep you safe.
11. Depending on how long you've been in the relationship with one of these there could be a smear campaign. They could talk badly about you. I've been in this twice and the truly good people are still in my life. The other's who fell for their lies I don't want in my life anyway.
12. If you know someone is bad news don't share any good in your life with them. Do small talk if you must talk with them. If they ask questions answer simply. Don't ever explain they twist it and use it against you every time.
13. You are only in control of you. The only one you can change is you. In ten years from now that person you left will be exactly the same. You, however, can grow and blossom into true beauty!
14. Once out DON'T ever go back, no matter what! It's better to be alone then sick with them.
15. Any negativity you are feeling is because you want them to be different, you are actually resisting the truth. Acceptance is your way out of all that negativity.
I wish you all the best!
Hallelujah 😢Wow thank you 🙏
#8 is wrong. Even, biblically wrong! Did you 'listen' to what Kris said? Read out of the Bible?😮
@@lorettamcgee969 If you disagree, that is fine with me. Or if your experience is different from mine that's okay too. All I know is that whenever I accept someone for exactly who they are I am healed and am no longer tied to their abuse. And that's good enough for me. Blessings to you.
Well said.
We should be forgiving. Christ forgave and we are supposed to be Christlike. That doesn't mean we tolerate or allow bad people in our lives.
From Matthew 18 NASB:
32 Then summoning him, his lord *said to him, ‘You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’ 34 And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. 35 My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”
This is the only channel talking about narcissists that 100% doesnt sound like the speaker is just venting their own bitter experiences. She actually uses scripture in context, not to affirm or validate victimhood, but to guide listeners in how to respond in a wise and biblical way.
I listen to her all day and I get strong in God ❤
My wife and I just found this channel and I’ve been dealing with our two children who are narcissist for sure. We have already done everything that she has said we should do using the scriptures to validate that. However, it was very nice to hear it from her. What a wonderful change, praise God
@@bobbates7421 so blessed to have found her now that my adult son is living with me. He started up again last night with the belittling and excuse making of why he can’t stop his addictive behaviors. Have tried everything and know I’ve done my bloody best for him. Would like to see more addressed on adult children who do not take accountability.
I would appreciate the speaker stop saying "a true Christian"...our salvation has nothing to do with our understanding and perfect alignment with her advice. She shares Scripture properly and wise and helpful guidelines. However, "a true Christian" can have heard some of these things for the first time, not be following her advice and still be a "true Christian". Please don't make a suffering Christian doubt their faith, or their value in Christ, because they haven't been doing these things. Please separate the two.
@@mishpotter8387 What would you rather she state instead of “a true Christian”?
Yes the best way against the narcissist is:no contact-ignore them and forgive them !!!!! I forgive my narcissist and all the mean people in my life!!!! Amen be GOD be with you all -wink from belgium !!!!!😉😉😇😇🥰🥰🙏🙏
You and me both. smh
The more you try to be nice to narcs or insanely jealous people, the more they will abuse you and indulge in smear campaign about you and you will end up hating them more and more.
Best to keep them at a distance and try not to hate them.🙏
Wow 🤯 thank you 🙏
There is no way I could hate my ex Gf narc .I will never forget what she did to me.dont like her for it but I can't hate her she was also my HS SWEETIE a long time ago.
This is so true. And as someone who goes out of their way not to hurt people’s feelings, I can’t wrap my head around it. But it’s so true.
This is 100% true. 🙏
@@r3sfernjbb I struggle with people who INTENTIONALLY harm others!!
I would love a video that is literally like a role play of how a conversation w a narcissist should go!
@@abbymaurer5317 Yes!!
She has this one: What You Say vs.What the Narcissist Hears (the Narcissistic Twist) ua-cam.com/video/aMCW_-RTjiQ/v-deo.htmlsi=ZNcVy5ZjVrlzmGJa
It's under "videos"
It shows what they say outwardly and what they are actually up to inwardly.
Hope this helps. Have a Blessed day.
Difficult because a Narc tends to jump around in conversations.. You really do not need to interact with them at all even when with them physically.. They will mostly speak of themselves.. Smile, nod, make little yes and no answers then make a polite excuse and walk away.. Detach your mind like they are detached from you. Its not personal, to them you are simply a pair of ears!! Try to imagine them as a cartoon character because that's what they are.. Nothing inside at all, just a noisy hollow vessel..
This video had some good points on it that one generally does not hear in advice concerning narcs.
@@emmsue1053 yeah that's true. I guess i'm just looking for how to stay sane and loving in a convo while also setting boundaries and not succumbing to the manipulation.
"Don't cast your pearls before swine"...
Thankfully we're not swine. She gave us quite a few pearls here.
Be wise with what you choose to do with them.
Took me a long time to understand this verse.
How true is that but how can we get rid of a narcissistic husband 🤔 I truly need help
@@dawnkravagna3200🙌
Praying for you now. Only Christ can change a person’s heart.
we can forgive others without reestablishing a relationship. only God can change toxic people
That part. 🎯
Forgiveness is one thing. Consequences and healing are another.
I struggle with this. I feel like I have to withstand whatever the narcissists throw at me because it’s the “Christian thing to do”.
People get a forgiveness situation confused with a self defense situation. If someone is going to try and hit me in my face I'm not going to stand there thinking 'I forgive you' because I'm not an idiot. In the same way if I know someone is a narcissist, I'm not going to place myself in front of that person to be abused. Even the Apostle Paul ran away from people when he was abused. God freed the Apostle Peter from prison by sending an angel to do a prison break. God wasn't sitting there on the throne saying 'You know what Peter and Paul? Why don't you just forgive your abusers?'
Modern day Christianity is full of narcissist who gaslight with scripture because they want to abuse you. Churches are full of flying monkeys and narcissists these days. That's why I don't attend church anymore.
@@joyelle7578
JESUS did not tolerate the self righteousness and pride of the Pharisees/Sanhedrin, nor did JESUS tolerate Peter His disciple when Peter tried to turn JESUS away from His Divine mission. JESUS said to Peter, “Get behind Me satan”.
JESUS told the unbelievers (in Him), you are of your father the devil. JESUS said, “If GOD were your father, you would love Me”.
When 1 Corinthians 5 was mentioned I instantly thought of 1 Corinthians 5:11.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 KJV describes a narcissist but it’s the final few words that must be obeyed “from such turn away.”
Thanks Beagle
I wish someone told me that sooner. Everyone told me to stay.
@@addvaluetoyourhome There’s a verse in Romans 1 that’s almost identical. Also 2 Thessalonians 3:6 if the person professes to be a Christian.
Exactly. For some it takes awhile, for it was many family, right from birth.
Except children who HAVE to spend co-parenting time with the devil ...no walking away. Court Ordered & ruins lives!!! God help the little ones.🙏💖
Let me tell you, Kriss! I'm been going to Therapy for many years with a couple of different therapists and they were not getting my problem solved!!!! Just a few weeks with you and my life is beginning to show a chance and people have noticed!!!
I'm sEnding prayers up for you right now to let you know, through God working through you, I'm baby stepping into becoming alive again after 20+ abuse. Thank you. Please don't leave us that need Gods teaching through you and UA-cam. Thank you with all my heart. Here is a smile for you that I haven't been able to do for a very long time🤗Your faithful follower, " Miss Joy" Bradford😇🙏
Taken me years. Love, kindness and the inner strength will overcome.
I appreciate all you said but rather than saying 'the true Christian '. You need to say the mature Christian. Many true Christians do not have the Spiritual maturity to always respond in the right way. But they are true Christians that have trusted I Christ alone for their salvation.
@@Ginnylarsen Good point! I would agree!
Very true feel the same way was been a Christian since 5 but was raised by narcissistic Christian parents.
l'm only just learning about how to deal with these people, and still finding it hard. Hearing Kris say ' True Christian ' doesn't help me..✝️🙏
I believe Kris is saying "wise Christians" "true Christian" rather than "mature Christian" because she is contrasting the truth against the false doctrine of wolves in sheeps' clothing, and she is speaking against this false accusation: "If you were a true Christian, you would..." Obviously, when it comes to these traits, we all have room to grow in the grace and knowledge of God.
Interesting approach to dealing with a narcissist, when they start prejudging you with their manipulation, just stand there and look at them.. Silently. Drives them crazy..
Thank you for this message that popped up under a video I was watching about narcissistic abuse. My in laws are narcissistic at worst and emotionally immature at best. I have a lot of anger towards them because most of the issues I have had in my marriage is tied to them and how they devalued my husband as a child. He is working on it, making progress and slowly seeing it for himself after he survived a hemorrhagic stroke 6 years ago, which has been a blessing from God. Anyone that reads this, please pray for me to forgive them and have patience while my husband heals from their abuse. I lean on God's promises daily to get through because I don't think I'll ever have a healthy & happy marriage in this life & we still potentially have many years ahead of us, we're 50 & 49 and have been married since teenagers. Thank you
@@stitchinginthebarn8307 I understand your pain and dilemma. We want to forgive it's in our nature. I struggled to. But everyday I ask Jesus to help me forgive. And through my prayers to Jesus I remind myself of how he was betrayed, lied too, tortured till His death, and yet Jesus forgave them all. So I tell myself if Jesus forgave the horrible things inflicted on him, well certainly I can forgive my ex husband, I can forgive others who have deeply hurt me as well. I don't know but this has helped me to forgive and let it go. I will pray for you as well. God bless you. 🙏🏻✝️💜🙏🏻
Truth in love
Integrity
Forgiveness
Peace
Wisdom
Thank you KRIS, so true
Prayers goes out to the lady that said her husband is a narcissist god is on the way to you escape from yhe abuse . Provbes 3 verse 5 through 6 Trust in the Lord he shall direct your path 🙏🙏🙏.
Avoid such people - slanderers and liars.
Thank you, I remember all the times I wanted to resolve things and couldn't because of the resistance of the other party. The reason I hung in there so long was because I had love and couldn't stand the thought that I might be hurting someone. When I walked away it was with grief that I had to do it. It was not to punish them or change them, it was to protect my own walk with Christ after realizing I was having no impact or means of resolving things. God clearly states to get away from those who are wicked because they WILL influence us even if only to enable them in the presence of others who are also learning their ways.
yes dust off our shoes and move to peace without toxic people who create chaos and like it
💯 had to do this with 3 family members.
And sometimes they really aren't evil. I feel degrees of this in an outreach ministry I may have to walk away from as the leader demeans my methods and literature I hand out to evangelize people. Example calling my "Daily Bread" 90 Day Devotionals "Daily Crumbs". I know in my heart God reaches people through both of us but the constant correction really hinders the Holy Spirit guiding me and my unique gifts and hand outs. Good to share that here I'm keeping quiet at church so as not to be called a divisive person.
@@bryguy8203 Amen, God has many personalities in His church and all are needed. We cannot have formulas for evangelism because we don't know that the Holy Spirit may be doing and His ways are limitless.
1 Corinthians 12:15-26
15 If the foot says, “Because I am not a hand, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason any less a part of the body.
16 And if the ear says, “Because I am not an eye, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason any less a part of the body.
17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole body were hearing, where would the sense of smell be?
18 But now God has arranged the parts, each one of them in the body, just as He desired.
19 If they were all one part, where would the body be?
20 But now there are many parts, but one body. 21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; or again, the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.”
22 On the contrary, it is much truer that the parts of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary;
23 and those parts of the body which we consider less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor, and our less presentable parts become much more presentable,
24 whereas our more presentable parts have no need of it. But God has so composed the body, giving more abundant honor to that part which lacked,
25 so that there may be no division in the body, but that the parts may have the same care for one another.
26 And if one part of the body suffers, all the parts suffer with it; if a part is honored, all the parts rejoice with it."
@@gwendolynwehage6336 Amen. Thanks very, very true. 📖 ⛪
Thank you Kris for this teaching. I have suffered immensely at the hand of a narcissistic minister. I tried to be loving, kind and agreeable, which seems impossible when you are the abused. I had to block numbers and emails to get peace. So grateful God had me hold my mouth and put up healthy boundaries. They are parasitic freeloaders! So blessed by your podcast!
Narcissist never give up they always want control over you no matter how you do you handle them makes no difference even when you give them their way they’re relentless they don’t care. There’s nothing there. They’re an empty shell there just for show. They enjoy making you uncomfortable they enjoy making you unhappy. They enjoy taking whatever you love away from you, they just an empty shell is the best way I can describe them. I don’t know anyway to stop them they’re unstoppable. And that’s the truth.
God will put and end to it soon.
Everything you say I have experienced with my wife,, it's very sickening,, Marie I'm 45yo male if you ever like a chat, I'm interested to see if two empath would get along really well ,, all friendly of course, 😊
just turn off the light, they will go
@@mariep4018 they are toxic..save yourself from them.
@@mariacompton1416 you cannot save yourself from a nation of domestic terrorists. They need to be held accountable and go behind bars, and it should all start with the terrorist in the White House.
Thank you for your amazing videos! May God bless your ministry abundantly! ❤
Thank you friend!
Thank you for your videos! It’s so refreshing to hear this perspective! I lived this and the church isn’t educated on this!
Sad truth. I'm so glad you're being blessed by the videos though :)
Yes. The Church of all places basically looks away. And sadly some of the people leading us are narcissistic. They are given such honorific titles.
People are taught "Don't touch God's anointed" in a controlling, non-Biblica way 😢
Thank you Kris ♥️
I used to get angry cry and get disrespectful, I realize that my husband would actually take joy in my hurt and turn it around and say it's me, every since I've started praying hard, I don't respond that way and it confuses him, I don't engage any awful things he says anymore, I smile and say thank you God! And I say! Thank you for your negative words
I'll take them! Now he doesn't continue to keep provoking me! He stops! I'm waiting on the day I get released from him! Right now I'm here to pass the test! GOD says love your enemies even the one that is your husband! The enemy is using him to get to me and one day GOD will have enough
Look how Jesus handled the narcissistic Pharisees. A wise man told me, "You can forgive and not go back to the dog that bite."
Only thing is we are to forgive as God forgave us meaning we would never label someone and if we truly forgive then we forget
And then another wise man said "Trust, but verify..."
Pres. Ronald Reagan
@@ExpectantHarvest 2 Timothy 3:1-5 foretold a narcissistic society and the recommended course of action is to turn away from such ones...no contact...we are to judge righteously and to test the spirits, if we observe such characteristics it is not labelling but an acknowledging....God is not all forgiving, he forgives those that acknowledge their sin, seek to be forgiven of wrongs committed, and a changed attitude and behaviour demonstrated by action.(otherwise there is no forgiveness extended to them by Him he deems them wicked worthy of his wrath)...if such does not occur we are to turn away from such people (narcs) and leave vengeance to God and not seek it ourselves, to be peaceable with all men as far as it depends upon us, no contact is not holding a grudge it is acknowledgement that this person (narc) is neither sorry, refuses to acknowledge harm done and no desire or demonstration of change, we are commanded to love our fellowman as ourself, but first we must recognize our worth and love ourselves in order to love our fellowman. Facilitating a vicious cycle of abuse to oneself is not loving to ourselves or God....and the first command is to love our God with our whole mind heart and soul, this is not possible when in the all consuming vicious cyclic narc abuse...which destroys Gods temple:heart mind and soul ..to the contrary it is the recognition of our worth (love of self) that will end this abuse, NO CONTACT.
I believe the church taught us the wrong concept of forgiveness and this has enabled much of our abuse.....the effect being that by such forgiveness as they taught enabled many of us to be preyed upon, they led us like lambs to the slaughter....their forgiveness=tolerance of evil behavior, while scripturally we are not to be tolerant of such...and the church is led by such men that benefit from such wrong teaching on forgiveness what it truly is and what it entails....the powers that be not only control govts but also the churches (501c3) churches teach tolerance, our societies become more lawless, his makes $$$ for legal sector judges attorneys etc and their prisons for profit....there is no money to be made out of a healthy happy society...
@@eyeswideopen3304 The best talk on Forgiveness is by Jesse Lee - but I must realize I became what I hated - I became my mother - she could not help herself -she had the same evil spirit from her mother - I chose to go and forgive her and then my father for not protecting me from her - and then I could return to the Father - anyone who is angry, worried, afraid, sad, emotional is not of God - I spent over 16.5 years in Churches that lied so much to me and denied the truth of what Jesus really did
One thing to remember is that only God can save someone. If you willingly stay in the path of a destructive person in some sort of effort to minister to them, check your ego. God doesnt need you to be abused to change that person. Pray for their blessing. God blesses people in all kind of ways including correction and consequences. And if someone is hurting you then their blessing has nothing to do with you.
I've heard many teachers explain that the abused person who acts as an enabler has been blinded and is trapped in a form of idolatry. I believe in many cases that is the case.
Because of this video I have gained back my faith after being abuse by GF who recently divorced me. Thank you Glory be to God
LOVE, INTEGRITY, FORGIVENESS, PEACE, WISDOM...
Thank you Kris. This video is definitely affirming that I am proceeding correctly. I appreciate the Bible verses too. The Word is a guide for life. God bless you and everyone on this channel.✝️❤️🙏🕊️🦅
Ok, after listening to this brilliant, enlightened woman for just the first minute, I can say that we NEED her message!!!
Having barely survived the wiles of a narcissist for about five years, where he wreaked HAVOC on the lives of my poor children and I, I can say WE NEED HER!!!
BTW this narcissist man was always reading his Bible and he said he was on his SEVENTH time reading it!! In reality, he used it as a shield to try to fool others!!
Your teaching is both heartful and anointed!! Thank you for sharing this gift of enlightenment!! I will be sharing this and revisiting this, often!! God Bless!! Glory to God!!
I didn't realize that being nice was actually its own form of controlling or manipulation. I was "nice" expecting a positive outcome. THAT was called "dysfunctional pleasing" in hopes of a good outcome. It took years of counseling to come out of that. It also took years for me to realize that I was trying to "control or manipulate" a particular outcome by my niceness. Once I learned that, it took years of practice to learn how to be nice but firm and how to distance myself from the narcissist and still have just enough contact as to not invite their crap into MY life. Thanks for your videos. It gives me boosts of confidence when I need it!
Narcs usually don’t respond well to being called out… they usually rage, calling you everything but your monkey’s uncle. Never admitting what they’ve done. If the narc lives with you, that’s a dangerous thing to do…could be.
Yes, that's right
I called out my narc mother and man she attacked me big time. My golden siblings, son and grand babies were all turned against me. She has always called me crazy, but now has destroyed my relationships. Oh well, it's their loss.
I have to say Amen here. I'm a mix of people pleaser with narcissistic traits. You're videos showed me a mirror to my soul that is setting me free even though change is hard and I fell a lot. Knowing the truth created in me a genuine desire to repent but it takes time to get ride of all the old habits. The Holy Spirit reminds me your teachings as I go back so I can correct the course immediately. Now I have hope, God bless you!
🤦🏽♀️The strategy, and endurance to navigate through all of this is so difficult and overwhelming 😢. I pray for change, healing and their desire to do, be and want better.
Kris, u r absolutely FABBBULOUS! New Christian subscriber here. After 24 yrs of Marriage to a Narcissist, n 25 yrs of FREEDOM I feel happy! ☺️
However, I hv 2 Narcissists for Sons, (aged 30 n 37) who still tear my heart out, tear it to shreds, n spit it out!
I needed to hear exactly what u said in todays’s video. THANK U SOOOOO MUCH, n greetings fm Sydney, Australia 🇦🇺🐨🦘🪼 God Bless u n ur work! 🙏🙏🙏😘😘😘✝️✝️✝️
@luisa. I am so sorry for all your suffering.
I have one narcissistic granddaughter. Very hard situation. Daughter and other granddaughter gaslighted. Blame me for what I notice. I have been called a narcissist 🤔
@Margaret - thank u for ur very kind reply Margaret! U r a sweetheart! ❤
On top of everything I hv suffered … Just this week I was told too, that “I am the Narcissist” 🤢🤮 unbelievable!
I’m soooo sorry for u too n wt u r enduring! With ur daughter n grand daughters! Yes, I’m just gaslighted again too! This time I’m going to IGNORE his 37th Birthday just like he IGNORES ME! But it KILLS ME to do this! 🤦♀️🤷♀️😮
All the best to u Margaret! 🙏🙏🙏
@@luisamedici5890Yes Ignoring may save our mental health. It is hard in one way, but you could consider it being the only path to take in order to preserve your sanity ,😢🙏🏼
Well said! The worst is the 'Christian' narcissist with special gifts i.e. prophesy who does prophesies one day and go into a narcissistic rage the next day, and continue thereafter as if nothing had ever happened. I am not going to judge if God can truly use someone like this as I believe God can use a disillusioned turtle to advance the Kingdom of God, but I for one do not trust an individual with such erratic and abusive behaviour and seriously question if God is glorified in the broader spectrum of things. What is even more disturbing is that the narcissist's partner has become so desensitized to his abusive and vulgar behaviour that she is currently his biggest enabler.
Sounds like a false prophet. This is what I just dealt with and had to get away.
@@maritascoonbee8285 prophets are mostly tested and tempted with their mouths!
Fortunately I only look at myself and if raised by anyone like this - I become my parents especially the mother.
This is WRONG, on so many levels. This man is sick. He is a hypocrite and not a leader...NOT a shepherd of God's Flock
This sounds exactly like my narc father and codependent mom
Thank you. I've been struggling with a situation of a woman at my church; I needed this!
Thank you!
You have confirmed that leaving was the correct decision! I will love from afar.
I have been struggling with continuing on in life, all of these topics I experienced again yesterday evening and last night.
I sincerely appreciate this video bc it has helped me to understand things, and when I understand things then I have clarity. When there is clarity then the depression, panic and hopelessness disappear.
The best remedy against a bad person is much ground between.
I had a realization that changed my life,
It's
"Good kind people can fight and get angry too, it is natural, to protect yourself and set boundaries "
I knew that God sees everything and would eventually take care of my situation, but I didn’t understand what my part was in all of this, as far as how much should I tolerate. I had never heard of a Narcissist or Narcissistic behavior, so I stayed in it for 36 years and then God came to teach and rescue me. Praise the Lord!
I just can't believe how relevant every book and video on this topic has been relevant in my relationship with my wife. I literally get the silent treatment for days when something needs to be addressed, even when there is nothing hostile about the conversation. I am accused of starting arguments that she clearly starts. I love her and very concern because of the positions we hold. It has been brutal for me but God keeps me strong, and I believe he is teaching me to be stronger. I learned about radical acceptance, basically asking the question who will I become if she never changes. We must all continue to Love, but stand in integrity. It has been good to hear someone else say it. When you said "back to fairy land and no acknowledgement of wrong doing", you were so accurate. Crazy how often I deal with that. I have to document and record certain things just to verify to myself that it actually happened the way I heard it. Things get so twisted to eventually blame me for everything. I have had to study so much on the narc word, which I don't even like saying. People have an extreme negative opinion about it. When you live with a love one dealing with such, trust me, I verified in more ways than one, you have to be anchored in God to survive it. I knew nothing about this topic until a counselor suggested that I study it over 10 years ago, based on what I was experiencing daily. I discovered I was very codependent at the time. Many heated arguments with wife, but I have always been the voice of reason behind getting additional help and moving forward. Help is always rejected, and there are always threats of leaving. I just stay focused on what I know God has promised for us. I am learning to let Him work out the details. Great advice on forgiveness. You are the first that I have heard take a strong biblical approach. Thank You for stating that God will fight our battles and to always seek peace.
Your words are very encouraging. Love to you. Surely His love is enough. Sounds as if you aredoing an awesome job in this situation. Thank you.❤❤❤
With all the confusion, twisting and the fact that you have to live hypervigilant by documenting I wonder what is keeping you there with so much instability and if this is a healthy place for you to be? Do you think our loving merciful Father would want you to just absorb such behavior?
@@LadyBug31705 Here is the kicker. Yep. “Turn to me all who are heavily burden”. Everything doesn’t always work out the same, but some things will strengthen you and change your identity for the better. But you can’t do it by yourself. There are a couple of movies that used to annoy me a little, but are true. Love Dare and War Room. Pray hard about your relationships and see if God will answer. It is not that God holds us hostage, but he is moved by what we fight for in His name.
This was one of the best of Kris' videos. Very, very helpful. The content is getting more refined to divide truth and do battle in the unseen realm. So very thankful! It's exactly what I needed to navigate a very toxic and twisted situation I've been bound up in for a very long time. It's time to leave and shake off the dust.
Thank you so so much! I've been troubled and stuck dealing with 2 family members who are narcissists. I'm stuck no longer! Because of you, my life is going to change for the best. I'm going to focus on all the good people in my life who love me. 🙏🏿
My mother was the narcissist in my life, and I took the 5th commandment literally. It was only a year or so before she died that I came to understand that I am to honor the position of a parent, not necessarily the particular parent. If only I had learned that when I was younger, I could have set boundaries earlier. Perhaps. A narcissistic parent gets to start the toxicity from the child's earliest understandings so can really skew their sense of reality.
I’m so excited to see this! This is explaining 40 years of mental and emotional abuse from an older sibling. We are both Christian and over the years I couldn’t understand why our relationship didn’t evolve into a caring relationship . Of course I would also blame myself until I couldn’t justify their behavior anymore. Thank you God Im getting more and more free listening to your videos!
My father is a narcissist and I want to seek healing so that I stop the cycle and not marry a man like my dad or raise my children with the destructive patterns like the ones I was raised with
❤
I recently set a boundary with a friend l have known for years because within just of every interaction she was lighting into me of her opinions of my health. I am under doctors care for what she is so adamant about. But as you can imagine with her not stopping and her just being my friend again it was horrible getting attacked every time. I had never told her before that no more seeing each other or texting until you decide to stop it. But l felt the Lord saying do it as you said let them suffer the consequences for their behavior. I have sought council for my godly older friend and she agreed that l was right in stopping our friendship until she apologizes and does talk about it after. Before all this started l said l will leave our lunches and hang up on you when you light into me because l want you to see how often you do this. I think that confrontation was the beginning of our break.
Perhaps instead of using “ 11:49 “true Christian” you could use “mature Christian “. I’m a true Christian but I struggle with how to deal with this person.
I so agree, we are human and we make all kinds of mistakes, we come from dust thank God for grace… I think she has a lot of wisdom and I’m thankful for the scriptures that she’s putting out there, but I was very alarmed by her use of the words “ true Christians”
@LindyWYID I understand but we have to remember no one os always going to say and do all of the perfect things all of the time and that she is human also and her intentions are always pure and she's mostly right about most things. ❤️ 💙
I say this in love just so we ALL can keep that in mind 🤍
You’re genius @Kris_Reece … spot on every time. God has anointed you for such a time as this.
Thank you Kriss! Great words superior reminder. 😊
You are so amazing, you found just the right words, just the right verses... I am blown away by how great this video was. God Bless you beautiful lady
I've had to learn all of this the hard way. But, I did learn it😀👍I watched tons of narc videos to break the trauma bond , and when I did, I realized through Kris, Tim Fletcher, James Kaddish, Pastor Mark Driscoll, and Steve Deace on Blazetv, to start to look at the world through a Biblical worldview. I had been SO IMMERSED in the worldly Worldview. I also set a goal to read the entire Bible this year, and it has helped me see things, and set a no contact boundary with my x husband who is a psychopathic ," nice" narcissist. I'm so thankful God led me out of bondage into freedom. It hasn't been easy, but it is so much better to be able to have a relationship with Jesus, and grow- even through trials and pain He is Always with me, and He NEVER manipulates or Lies😀!! God IS Good!!
@elizabethy2912 try listening thru the Bible in a year ...:) Dab/Daily Audio Bible is a free app and a website. Pastor Brian is an amazing story-teller.. and teacher. God bless you.
Thank you God i pray to show me the way to deal with my mother and this video came to me thank you God.
I came across this just in time, because God is always on time!!🙌 Thanking God for you!
I always love to say that Biblical Love is not squishy; meaning lovely-dovey, accepting of EVERYTHING, etc. It is in fact truth oriented, and lesson-learning oriented I believe. Speaking truth in love to others even if it may offend them.
Yes ☝🏼 agree
If only you knew how much I needed to see this video. I've been trapped in a toxic relationship for nearly a decade and only recognized my partner's narcissism three years ago. I've come across plenty of secular advice on handling narcissists, but as a Christian, it never quite resonated with me. I've had countless conversations with my mother about my duty as a Christian to stay with my wife (the narcissist) and her daughter, believing that God wouldn't want me to leave them. Financially, their lives would be challenging without me. This internal struggle has been a heavy burden-wanting to leave but feeling obligated to stay because of my convictions. I feel particularly guilty about our daughter, whom I've raised since she was five, and the impact it would have on her. This video has offered a new perspective, though I still wrestle with the idea of leaving them because of my faith. Thank you so much for sharing these words; I desperately needed a Christian perspective on dealing with a narcissist.
This is how Holy Spirit instructed me. "May God judge between you and me, may God avenge me of the wrong you have done to me, my hand shall not touch you. I release the offense into the Hand of The Big Angel to accomplish The Justice, The Lord Will Confirm. The Lord rebuke the wicked. REPENT. Let go of hate, let go of anger, let go of fear. Love Is The Answer. Walk In Love it is the Solid Rock.
Listening to this has been like having a personal counselor who has already heard my entire story! Thank you for your good advice! God reward you
Bringing up a hurt from the past multiple times can become a problem.
It can become a weapon if used wrongly.
Yes, this is what all 12 step programs advocate - I was in a cult for 16.5 years.
@@truthhearit1471 yesss they need to surrender their trauma
Hi Kris , your channel is truly a blessing to me . I look forward to your videos. Thank you for your ministry. ❤🙏
Our family has to deal with a pathological liar, narcissist and Sociopath all rolled into one... pray for us!
Truth spoken here! Thank you for making your point and supporting it with scripture. 💯🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing this! The Lord is revealing bit by bit, what I have not understood before, although I have come a long way already. My mother caused a lot of damage and now after her passing, a lot is getting sorted out. I truly appreciate having actual scripture quoted. As it needs to be based on God's word. Blessings to you and love to all those that are struggling and healing from the pain others have caused. God does not stay silent and He is with us🙏
Your message is wonderful! You give clear explanation on forgiveness and how to walk away without feeling guilty. Thank you so much!
Soooo.... Interesting ..... Very ... Very ... I don't have words to describe that how much I loved listening this video. God bless you more my dear Kris.
Thank you! This was very affirming ❤🙏✝️🛐❤️
Thank you for another educational video. You are a true woman of God with Godly insight. Thank you.
Amen 🙏
Wisdom is just a prayer away💕
Thank you Lord 💖
Thank you for sharing how to have boundaries with love 🙏
I have realized that "Love" doesn't allow others to "sin" against them. Love steps aside and allows God to handle things in His way.
Thank you for the free guide. I can’t express to you how grateful I am.
Thank you SO much for sharing this! I deal with a covert narcissistic elderly mother. I am an only child and am her ride to the store on a weekly basis. Dealing with her can be a challenge! This insight is very helpful. Blessings and Shalom! ❤
May our Lord strengthen you!
Thank you Kris! As a born again believer, I struggle with the guilt that can come with dealing with my mom and trying to show kindness without becoming a doormat. Your videos have been a great help and blessing. Thank you for what you do and may Yahweh continue to bless you and your family. 😊🙏❤
@jillvanlew2341 Hugs, I hope you make time for yourself too and find good boundaries to put up with her. God sees and hears it❤
Set your decisions and choices and opinions and stick to them
The thing a narcissist can’t handle is being ignored. Yes they’ll come at you with insults after you’ve ignored the gas lighting, they’ll call you names & ghost you for several days afterwards, they’re really just a brat child in an adults body. They love to dish it out but can’t take it from anyone else.
So I continue to pray for him & bless him & that opens the door for God to deal with him & also doing that helps me to forgive the disrespectful & ungrateful behaviour.
I wish narcissist could self-reflect and be accountable and responsible for themselves and forgive themselves instead of being in denial and blaming others for issues that they themselves created
Amen Amen 🙏🏾
I’m encouraged by your videos and learning so much. Thank you so much and God bless you. ☦️
Xlnt ideas - well stated.
Most churches, pastors and Christians teach ideas contrary to your wisdom. While I value your teaching, I have no desire to join a church family as all I ever experienced when I mentioned narcissistic abuse against me was gaslighting and blame that I was responsible for all or most of the abuser's behavior and that I needed to model Christian love. I still struggle with forgiveness but I choose to see the narcissist as a pile of dumpster debris who simply needs to be permanently removed from my life.
Or the new one,"you're not supposed to be offended"
Hallelujah 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 complete forgiveness doesn't mean you condone what happened it doesn't mean there won't be GOD'S justice and it doesn't mean you have to stay around that person but complete forgiveness sets u free I totally completely come in agreement with this video thank you thank u thank u 4 making it and giving a thorough explanation of how to deal effectively with the circumstances and situations that encountering a narcissist occurs without it damaging our souls and spirits in the process of dealing and responding to the trouble a narcissist causes. I appreciate you and this video thank you thank you In JESUS CHRIST'S GREAT and MIGHTY NUCLEAR NAME NAME above All other NAMES in whom ALL CREATION is immediately and permanently subject to HIM it is written it is FINISHED Hallelujah SELAH
Im a quiet guy, I do not deal with narcissists, I do not fight useless battles, I wish not to be provoked for I believe Jesus gave me the right to be God's son so I am a warrior, I will fight the good fight and silence is part of it.
Watching these videos re this topic again is so very helpful. So, Thank You, Kris. It's making a great deal of sense to many of us, I'm sure. I hope you are really blessed for doing this. ❤❤
I know a christian lady, single like myself, vulnerable in various ways too, but whose strong tendency to be dominating, manipulative and actually quite aggressive, has caused a considerable amount of stress to several Christians in the church we were all in. There were times when I actually became demonically oppressed after spending time with this person. Now, that was bad enough, but the pastor's wife (and the wife of one of the Elders) wanted me to be 'friends' with her (and her friend who was also stressful to deal with, but not as aggressive). Result: I eventually had to leave that church (for that & other good reasons). But, years later, that (now retired) pastor's wife still wants/expects me to be closely associated with this lady, I believe, but I am no longer so vulnerable or ignorant. I'm free now. And I'm no longer caught up with this very unhealthy situation.
** I really believe we really need to be aware of this issue, as it's very common, in churches too. I sincerely believe the Lord does not want anyone to be manipulated or forced to be closely involved with people who refuse to take responsibility for their choices and behaviour, and who, for years even, continue to oppress and use others in certain ways (unless you just can't get away, for certain reasons). And if others try to force us to be closely involved with people doing this, we don't have to allow them to do that to us either. We can certainly love people with this problem, but we DO need to set very strong boundaries etc, and ONLY do what we believe is right, and really WANT to do. You need to take care of yourself on this respect especially if you are vulnerable yourself.
No one has the right to bully or force us. God wants us to be free. Hope that helps. Sorry for long comment. ❤❤❤
Well I didn’t jerk my integrity and that’s what he constantly uses against me to show others how horrible of a person I am. when you are with a toxic person it makes you do things against your character. I just wanted to be loved. I didn’t mean to do anything wrong. I just wanted love. And now that we’re divorced he is still verbally abusive. And he’s turned our two oldest boys against me with those lies. Yet I have peace that God is going to restore my relationship with my boys. I love them so much.
Kris, I love your teachings! It’s very challenging, though still very possible, when it’s one’s offspring who’ve been influenced by the world which allows, enables and entitles. Very sad and challenging esp. when they’ve been raised in the church. ❤😊
I had to completely disconnect from my narcissist sister, she has been abusive my whole life and my mental and physical health has suffered terribly because of the abuse, it was a necessity to remove her from my life , I don’t let myself feel hate or bitterness towards her but I just couldn’t let her cause any more damage.
I was taught in Catholic schools to absorb the abuse and was always told retaliation made me worse than the instigators of the abuse.
Took me over 30 years to acquire enough self worth to realise I didn’t have to put up with being treated like garbage by my sister or people at school and following that the workplace.
@@ck9kn same, took me 60 years though. 🙏
Sometimes this is a family member who you are not just going to discard. This calls for heavenly discernment of when and how to interact. - much love to you all!!!!!
The Lord taught me this the hard way with my mom, sisters, brother, grandpa...
@@JensMorrisonyess my daughter hasn’t spoken to me in 11 days I haven’t called but it’s hard to have no contact
@@yvettebenito7142 Agreed. My sister was abusing my mother a couple years ago. She was threatening to kill herself, every time she didn't get her way. Well. I kicked her out of my house, firstly. And secondly, I taught my mother to stand up to her, and not talk to her until she started to change. And it worked. My sister started off on the road to recovery from then on. Had some big bumps. But tough love, is love.
@@yvettebenito7142 God is good. You'll get through this. I'm sorry you have to deal with it. It's hard. And it sucks. That really sounds like the sort of narcissism my sister was going through. She was really bad. She literally would get stuck looking in mirrors. But the manipulation...that was the worst. And my mom was someone who suffered a lot of abuse as a child, and saw other people suffer. She couldn't do it, herself. But your daughter can't do that to you. She can't use and abuse you. That's not okay. And whatever happens, you have to accept it is her choice. She is doing this.
This doesn't need to be a permanent thing. It just needs to break the cycle.
God can get you and your daughter through this. In Jesus name, Amen.
@@JensMorrison yesss Amen 🙏🏽 I too suffered several abuses in my childhood and God saved me - my mom had attempted suicide and I found her so this was truly the most painful experience BUT GOD is showing me by knowledge through these videos, comments like yours, and my Godfamily. Also learning about idols - and how our.children can be our idols. Thank you blessings and so glad your sister sought help and is better. Praise God!
@@yvettebenito7142 She's still on the road to recovery. But who isn't? Be blessed, in Jesus name!
Thank you Kris❤ this has been so helpful 🙏 I subbed up for more support and I am loving that you back everything up with Scripture 🙌❤️✝️⚔️
Amen and Amen Kris!! Good Word and Teaching!! May God Bless you and your ministry beyond imagination!! 🙏👏
Thank you Sherrilynn
Absolutely the best lesson on this personality type but to go on further the spirit behind this is Jezebelle!
Warning others of sin is gracious and merciful. It is up to the individual or Narcisst to choose to repent. If they fail to heed God's word and warning, they will be disciplined by the Almighty. Mic drop....end of story.
The mic drop is so corny.. it takes away from what you’re trying to say.
I would state, "A strong Christian" vs "A True Christian". Just me of course. Gracias so much for this affirmation. Bless us all 🙏 "Isa"
I agree! I didn't like being told I'm not a true Christian when I know I am. 😢
Kris, will you please talk about this regarding siblings?
Same
JUST WHAT I NEEDED TO HEAR. Thank you, very much indeed, Kris! 🌷💯❤️🙏😊
Amazing insight and wisdom.. I thank God for your Ministry.
I wish you would have generalized the criteria and not limit it to a male and female romantic relationships because as you've said always - it's everywhere!