Templar (ESTP, ISTP, ENFJ, INFJ) Abusers? | Season 17 Part 2 Quadras | CS Joseph
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- Опубліковано 15 жов 2024
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CS Joseph discusses how Templar types (ESTP, ISTP, ENFJ, INFJ) can be abusers of those around them.
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"Charity begins with those closest to you". Hope your family can see this one day
Very interesting how NP's and SJ's are like: MY DARLING FAMILIARITY!
While SP's and NJ's are like: MY LOVELY NEW SHIT!
lol
It's so fucking true
This explanation is actually spectacular
Hats off to you
This is something I've been struggling with putting into perspective for a while, that feeling that I'm being treated with less kindness, love or respect compared to complete strangers. And it is abuse. Sometimes it's really painful, but usually its a dull ache. Its the kind of pain that is easily gaslighted and misunderstood. -infp
chase: ...an enfp, VERY capable...
me: oh?👀
chase: ...world of warcraft player..
me: oh.
😂 exactly
Me too 😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Lmao
Failure ultimately reduces down to WOUNDED FEELINGS and self-acceptance comes as you accept your OWN WOUNDED FEELINGS, as a parent accepts his or her own child. The wonderful thing about this is that the woundedness upon acceptance transforms into
Healing, This is self-acceptance. And this is how you heal from your psychological wounds.
And as you are able to accept your own failures, you are now able to accept the failures of others, and this is what we call love.
Love the Lord your God with all your heart with all your mind with all your soul and love others as you love yourself.
I find it interesting how both ENFJs and ESTPs perform frequent friend check-ins, until suddenly they don’t. As an INTP, I can often pick up a paused friendship right where it left off but have recently stopped letting my ESFJ subconscious be the one to initiate check-ins (on principle) with an ENFJ buddy who’s found yet another “new shiny” friend. Now it’s become a scientific curiosity, how long if ever will he notice? Sure it’s frustrating but being an INTP, we’re pretty good at ghosting so… forever is probably the answer. Haha
"Put in the work and then only healing begins" this really hit me and motivated. Thank you for the video.
Yeah I'm guilty of doing this to people. You got to learn to forgive yourself for your past failures and take responsibility 100%. Spot on Chase - stop running.
I guess it’s the result of not feeling good enough. Our own family can be seen in that same category, so we look to strangers for validation.
My father is an ENTP and was thoroughly inundated into Scientology. Not a Templar but I get the whole, "Sorry, we can't have nice things because I gave all the money to a cult." vibe.
Also, mom probably an ENFJ and she does the whole self sacrifice thing, too. Putting everybody above her family and dying on the cross for strangers until she loses her mind over it. She can't not just totally sacrifice herself for random people on the street even if it makes her miserable, even if it's for people who shit on her. It's kind of insane and really destructive to her personal life.
The Church of Scientology is a very bad cult, with whom usurps everyone will, and everyone’s freedom to think critically. For an INTP as myself, I would be join any church, and happy being a non-believer.
Family is overrated, they screw you over more than strangers ever will.
Maybe nfjs are looking elsewhere cause they got used by their own small enviroment and taken granted to the point they would rather give to new people and feel wanted and appreciated again🙄. Also be careful of not telling anyone your problems, even family members, cause it could get to a point where there are hidden abusers in families never get caught, and years passes by till it surfaces or never. I wish healing to all people who suffered any kind of real abuse.
My I have two Templar siblings, one INFJ and one INFJ, and they always ran away from their problems and always blamed everyone else for their mistakes. I’m the only non-Templar of the three siblings, the INTP
Chase, you never cease to amaze me. I think this is the only channel people that are interested in personality types/functions/sides of the mind, need to watch. You actually understand this profoundly. As a Templar (INFJ) I was raised by an ESTP (albeit he has a lot of narcissistic tendencies and everyone outside the home thinks he's the best ever), I'm the sister of an ISTP (the hardest person for me to deal with), and I have worked for an ENFJ who I thought was my best match as far as types go, but later realized that he would put people-pleasing above integrity - amongst other things- which is a total turn off for me. I think I've improved quite a bit on my people-pleasing tendencies, but I have to admit I still struggle with always prioritizing time with my family and I think it's because often I've felt emptied by them in a sense, I have always had to parent everyone and it's become exhausting to me.
Anyway, your INFJ friends especially are extremely lucky to have someone like you to talk to. Keep giving us truth, it's much appreciated :)
I knew that one ESFJ mother that almost did the same , she forgot her kids and spent most of her time talking to people instead , also using her kids to please other people too by serving them and act like a servant
Yes ESFJ worry way too much about what others think of them based on how kind they are.
Same with me. What's worse is my mom in her 40s decided to have one child again just because the house has been "empty" enough (her children go to boarding school etc). 😢 I'm grateful for my little sister she's the most amazing thing ever happened to me and our family but my mom spends most of the time with her community, almost completely ignore my little sister that me and my other siblings often take charge in taking care of her and parenting her even coming to her school events.
@@Coneman3 Out of all the FJs, ESFJs do care about what others think the most
Thanks for believing in us, Chase. So good to hear this inspiring vibe from you again. Reminded me of your early lectures on personality types. The INFJ one was insanely inspiring and has helped me to believe in myself. I thank you. I do thank you.
What an amazing video, very helpful! It explained a lot about my past relationship with an ISTP. I couldn't believe he would run away in another country after 7 years of relationship and stay with his best friend without even giving me any explanation. And now that I think, it happened the week of the first time he saw me crying ever, maybe that made him feel as a failure. And by the way, I can't believe those people in Chase life got away with sexually abusing a kid, it's absolutely unacceptable!!!😡😡😡 What a terrible offense to a young child, I just can't believe that, breaks my heart! I wish all the best to everyone!
This explained a lot about my relationship with an ISTP too!
@@candace9701 I know, it's tough, so Chase is saying we should accept them and be there for them and let them know we accept their failures and help them grow I guess, but what if they disappear again?
@@Mirka-tq1ji I am ESTP. I know, the worst combination ever for ISTP other than exactly our own types. I didn't know at the time.
I guess miracles can happen.
@@candace9701 Good for you for at least being aware, I wish it all works out well for you!ll
Oof, this one hit hard. Have recently seen this pattern in my own life as an INFJ - thankfully I was confronted at a young age by my (almost positive now) ENTP father on how I treat those closest to me vs everyone else. But still struggle with admitting failure in my relationships and, as a someone who has moved a lot, felt I let people down consistently so it was better to just disappear from their life. Trying to work at this in the place I’m in now and finding it a very real and painful struggle - really hoping that the effort produces strength of character and healing ❤ And so thankful for the people close to me who have stuck around, couldn’t be doing this without them! Thanks for sharing this information so clearly and practically - I don’t know if all Templars feel this way but internal battles are always so abstract in my head it’s hard to find the root cause/solution for these cycles at times.
No offense (and really I mean no offense when I say this I'm just highlighting something as an ISFJ) but is the issue really you can't find the root cause of the problem or cycles that keep occurring or is it you aren't willfully (Ni) attacking the issue head on and are avoiding things because it's more of the same issue like chase said of running away from the issue due to not wanting to face some painful experiences and failures you're aware of that are there and using your introverted thinking to problem solve and figure out why things are happening as they are and just more lying to yourself and others like people on UA-cam and saying that you aren't capable of figuring out the problem and how to fix it and playing the victim and hoping to receive a get out of jail card from other people to avoid the painful experience of dealing with the problem and other things. Just wondering that is?
What advice would you give to someone who is in a relationship with a Templar? Should we confront them and at the same time stick to them?
Are you asking me or the person who first brought this comment section up (Abigail) because I don't want to put my two cents in unnecessarily if it's not needed?
@@redadventurer3552 Oh sorry, I'm actually asking Abigali as she can have the perspective of what a Templar needs in those situations in order not to run away, but I'd love to hear any other perspective as well if you want to share. Thank you!
What advice would you give to someone who is in a relationship with a Templar? Should we confront them and at the same time stick to them? Should we communicate to them we are scared they would run away?
As an INFJ, in a well matched romantic partnership I can’t imagine putting others before my other half, or giving money away. I’m very careful with money. Not saying this is wrong but it just doesn’t resonate very well.
Yep... Im an INFP and relate more to this tha my INFJ bf
You always drop content at the perfect time
Yeah, I will not give up on working on myself , because we all have toxic traits if we are not afraid to admit it . Thank you , it makes me more aware of mine,it helps 🙏
Thank you Chase.
That's the most insightfull video I have ever seen on Templars.
I really needed it in my life en.
Oof this was painful to watch but very accurate. My immediate family is mostly templars (ENFJ dad and me, INFJ mom, ESTP bro #2, and ISTP bro #3) and philosophers (INFP bro #1, ENFP sis #1 and Niece #1). Growing up there was constant conflict and avoidance. As adults we don't spend any time together as a family and rarely communicate. All the templars (including myself) have had a pattern of shiny new person/thing syndrome/prioritizing others and avoided family, while the philosophers flee and try to find/start a different family. The pandemic spurred me to repair my family relationships and sometimes it feels more exhausting then the work I do with clients (I'm a social work student).
ISTP dad, spending hours in bars, drinking. Neglecting mom. And now gives creepy remarks to me daily, about how he desires his own daughter. Because that's fun on a daily basis.
ENFJ sister, neglecting her third husband, self-centered and doing all for her job. I never was anything to her., Till I got prettier and now she's jealous.
ESTP brother, who got in a very dark place. Succumbed to one circle of toxic friends to another. And they ruined his sanctity.
Victims:
My ISFP and INFP brothers, who we almost don't see at all anymore.
And then the worst offender; me.
INFJ trash that imploded, and now finds herself deserving of all the harm coming my way. Rightfully so...
But at least, I had plenty of examples in the family of how not to do it.
Tries to love herself, untill a depraved ENFP shreds her heart to pieces. Just because he could.
Well, that sure is helpful and positive for practicing self-love.
If somebody teaches you the exact opposite. Because it's not about what is true. It's about what people believe is true.
Mom goes first place.
I try to be there more for the family.
Sacrificing my alone time, just to sit and listen to the small talk and arguements. Because that too, is always a delight.
Nobody even talks to me, I just sit there.
And try to say something, when 3 people have a communicative trafic jam in every direction.
I got to shut it, that's my task. I'm not even there in their eyes. Just... background noise.
So 3 cheers for doing the good thing, and it not paying off.
Might as well watch paint dry.
And father? If he would stop his perverse intentions, yeah.
As long as he keeps being a creep, nu-uh. Gotta protect myself at least a little, right?
Please escape this situation asap especially from the horrific dad and forgive yourself. Don't talk about yourself in this way, try to be more forgiving, that might be the first step. Can you report your dad to the authorities?
Wierd how my dad is an ISTP and gives off the same creepy desiring daughter vibes💔
You two gotta record this and show it to someone who can help you get out of this.
@@CynthiaJuma-lt4iiAll aristocrats are creepy in these things.
Thank you for telling your story & being vulnerable. Thank you for telling us that we can do it! If you can be filled with the pure clean Spirit after I hope you will lose the demons from you, never to be bothered by them again.
I'm not sure I entirely agree, I give my sisters, my mom, my closest friends, even my closest coworkers my time, care, special treatment and priority. Even multiple people have said that I seem quiet and shy and a little intimidating at times until they get closer to me, and then I open up. -infj
So scary 😱
Yea, this video kinda angered me. Almost all the time he talks about types he is negative, especially to infj or templar types. Which is why I hardly watch his videos anymore. I need motivation and inspiration, not anymore criticism to encourage my self defeatist attitude.
My best friend is an INFJ. Thankful for your type!
I am an INTJ and never pleased people and never will. THat got me an enemy to every "community"
Neglect is hardcore in these types sometimes. Very good video.
Well put, good sir. Your experience with and observation of templars resonates deeply. My young me feels seen and is humbled by your appropriate assertions. My old me has experienced very similar scenarios with other templars. Additionally, I've always had a thing for never door slamming ex's, or even friendswho didn't flatly deserve it, and while i think there are times it may have kept me from moving on, I believe that my dedication to sort of "fix" my failures with them taught me how not to continue to fail others. I feel like this might be your most compassionate video on Templars that I've seen. Thank you, Chase.
Absolutely correct! We thank u so much never give up on us.
I really can't with this dude and his little minions who absorb everything he says without questioning him even if he's obviously wrong about some things. As an infj, I hardly "fail" people. Only time was when I was younger. When I became a teenager I tried to be better. Family members failed me a lot, especially my parents. And even tho my istp mother has dissapointed me the most, I will staunchly attack anyone who comes for her. Same for my friends even when they judge me or try go control me.
Its also extremely disgusting what your family did to you and I am real sorry it happened. It probably won't mean much to you or think I should keep the same energy but I can't help but to address it. I just wanted to express my apologies. But it doesn't mean all of us are the same.
Awesome lecture, love the second half explaining how they see those close as buckets of all their failures so that is why they run and seek out fresh buckets.
"I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member." Is a good reminder of it.
9:25 My ENFJ mother does this. Hence why I could never be with an ENFJ. Their Ti inferior needs to be listened to at any cost. Other than the fact that an ISTP (my type) is well off not dating an ENFJ, anyway, due to subconscious relationships being notoriously difficult.
I know I was badly used and abused by an ENFJ. She in the beginning was fascinates my my strong Ti, was an eager participant to our D & D group, had two children just like me, we both travelled and went to places together, but until one day her jealousy got the best of her and decided to turn on me and betray me. She is everything to destroy my reputations and get all my friends turn again me, but luckily it winded up backfiring on her. As an very loyal INTP friend, I was devastated, and decided to never be friends with her again. I also know this other male ENFJ that admitted to my face that he was a serial cheater and he a very high body count, and even winded up betraying his gf and the mother of his child
Wow, that's very sad and I am sorry for you :( I had a similar experience with an ENFJ friend trying to destroy an INFP that is very close to my social circle. I have not been in the position of using my Te demon like and I hope I never do it. Thanks for sharing your experience it helps me a lot as an ENFJ to be aware of possible behaviors that my Te demon is capable of. Btw, INTPs Ti fascinates me too!
-ENFJ
Like many sociopaths use people until the bridge is burned, templars do this in their own way.- Infj
Templars, whom constantly chase me for friendships are the most unforgiving people.
My mom is an istp, and this makes total sense. When her and my dad got divorced it seemed like she became an entirely different person.
Accurate.
Lol I know from the language I used in the preamble of my typing session you're convinced I'm a super-ego focused ENFP (I'm not, as I dont have the cognitive function stack of an ENFP, but find my shadow best for communicating effectively, with Si types) but this describes me to a T. Help strangers while my loved ones suffer neglect because I love them as I love myself, which is a lesser love than the one with which I love others.. and I used to lie to myself all of the time. It's a hard thing turning that Templar vision inward, and seeing just how Corrupt, and Corrupting we are. That those we've most wanted to help, we've hurt instead.
The pain of it is bottomless, so we relegate it to the dead field of the past where it cannot touch us, destroy our totems so we can forget, and focus on tomorrow and the boundless horizon.
Pretty sure The Littlest Hobo was a Templar.. ❤
~MadRedCarnelian
I just hope this isn't a nicely designed "get out of jail free pity party" comment being used to shirk responsibilities and trying to save face from other UA-camrs who may read this comment and offer their indifferent sympathies.
Jesus… I’m an INTJ from a family of Templars-ENFJ mom, ISTP dad, ESTP big sister. As the lone Te/Fi user, I definitely reap the benefits of “Golden Child” treatment, but I was also pushed into my ENTP shadow a lot. Fe trickster can be a bitch to deal with in a predominantly Templar household. Oddly enough, I’ve observed the differences between Soul and Mind Temple Templars. My parents can be prideful, and they’re of the Mind Temple. My ESTP sister, though, got a lot of shit from my parents for being shortsighted for the better part of her life. However, she’s aware of her flaws, and she’s one of the most changed people I know. She’s still flawed, but she doesn’t even try to hide it at this point, which is what I love about her and why I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for her. Mind Temple Templars seem to change when change is convenient and/or self-serving.
Funnily enough, my two best friends are also Templars-one an ESTP, the other an ISTP. The ESTP seems to have a chip on his shoulder about me, though, because I’ve called him out in the past for making up grandiose stories about himself and fabricating lies to escape unpleasant truths about himself. Every time I’ve done so, I’ve come prepared with receipts, to which he has to forfeit. It’s a tragedy watching an ESTP realize there’s nowhere to run or hide. I can tell a part of him, somewhere deep in his superego, despises my guts, looking for any chance to undermine the “authority” I’ve gained within our friend group. Unfortunately for him, specific to our friend group’s athletic foci, his Se hero can’t compete with my Se inferior. As such, he’s subjected to witnessing me amass more loyalty from others despite, quite possibly, working harder than I do to achieve just that. I’ve been friends with him for a while, though, but it’s annoying knowing your righthand man is side-eying you. I always offer him forgiveness and help, but I think he thinks I’m doing so self-righteously. I don’t know. If these issues worsen, I’ll probably have to shut his shit down once and for all and slam the door on his ass.
Same here, and I’m an INTP
Did you call him out in front of others? Or just by himself. That'd make a huge difference
@@choppers3474 Oh, by himself for sure. I know he cares about how he’s coming off to others if he’s self-aggrandizing in front of them. I’d never go out of my way to embarrass him. Sometimes, he tries to “make an example out of me,” though, but when these instances arise, I try to deescalate the situations rather than bruise his ego. He pushes it sometimes, though, I’ll admit. Obviously, as an INTJ, my ego won’t allow for much resistance, especially when he’s trying to impress new people at my expense. I don’t take kindly to that kind of a social interaction at all, and, furthermore, I don’t think I should be expected to do so.
@@HoytoHoyto Heh, I agree. I mean, he seems like an asshole. Knowing Estp's though, like my father, it's possible that your mate is trying to give those around him a good experience, more than you might think. Obviously, I don't know what has been said and done between you and your mate. However if I assume he's a typical Estp (even if unhealthy), then I can bet that one of the main reasons he goes on with all the grandeur is because he wants to involve the people around him in a great experience. Something special to enrich the experience of the people around. Si doms tend to love this and, naturally they validate it over time, leading to a good pairing between them and the typical Estp.
The Estp's Fe also wants to make other people feel good (unlike Esfp who wants to enrich others' experiences out of authenticity), but they can struggle with that and, in many cases, overlook other people's emotions when it is convenient for them, or in actuality when they are trying to look and feel superior in those people's eyes... I've found the line tends to blur there due to the nature of the Se x Fe loop.
So, keeping in mind that I've made assumptions about your circumstances, I'd say your best bet to enhancing your relationship with the Estp is by showing him that you genuinely appreciate the "selfless" parts of his self-aggrandising tendencies, even if he is covering up some unhealthy parts of himself too. You can also point that out to him and, then, perhaps he'll be open to humility.
@@choppers3474 I tend to prefer hanging out with ESFPs these days for the reasons you stated. They’re my subconscious type, so I can understand and relate to them better.
I’m going to be honest: in the past, before I was aware of the cognitive functions, I tried the advice you’ve given. It works in terms of keeping spirits high and egos intact. It’s not the self-aggrandizement that gets to me, though; it’s the spreading of BS narratives that, in the end, lead unsuspecting mutual friends of ours to easily preventable disappointment-that’s what gets to me. I’d much rather he realize how awesome he is without embellishments. Then again, that would require him to work on his Fi trickster, so he may never realize his awesomeness. That’d be a shame, but such is life…🫤
I am sorry to hear about your church experience. I went through some similar difficulties to what you have described and I resolved inside of myself: "This is not God's love for me; God's love is patient and kind..." It got me through, and I am still with Jesus and close to God because I didn't let the bad people take His love away from me. His love got me through it and now I am free. I have peace. I am sorry for the word curses that your parents spoke. I pray for healing for your heart.
Oh no. This is happening to some i really love. They thinking i see them as a failure. But I'm gonna love them no matter what, and i really really just wanna love them thru this
And i just don't know how to make them seeee
Just a thought.. maybe just maybe.. if their parents could get to know bout this situation and give them the necessary support they need to become better.. just for one generation.. There will be a new loop starting to give the templar beta qudra the ability to pass that forgiveness to their own beta qudra children.. Cuz tbh most of the time the present society always stand up against to the children emotional needs.. Which causes them to become avoidant.. The problem is that how we going to break the old loop of abusive behaviours as parents, to do such a change like that.. cuz as parents we ourselves are not mature enough to take care our children.. This is why emotional intelligence is essential when parenting.. what a waste..
There's something to be said about the abuse that happens within a nuclear family dynamic. we then put it up as a mirror which behaves as a kind of chaotic attractor. the people who enter our lives later on in life may or may not reflect the traits we seek. the traits we are as yet unfamiliar.
Thank you for your video Joseph it resonates with me a lot
even though I am successful in some areas of my life, some have been stagnant for a long time and I keep repeating the same mistakes
It's time to get to work ⛰
Beautiful day to all the Templars and their loved ones 😉
Thank you very much. I am proud of myself for having come to same conclusions on my own. My self worth is now justified
Yes I’m with an INFJ and he rather give extra attention to a stranger than to me lol but this gives me perspective on his behavior…..
you'll tame him dw (if infp is ur type?👀)
Yes lol
I absolutely run and hide first sign of anybody trying to tell me I can do better.
I admit it, but never in a way where its conducive with my relationships with my friends and family. Nobody thinks I can change. I branded myself as unable to change. All my relationships are based on the premise I can't work hard. Not sure if I will change, but I know that I am able to change. I'm an INFJ
I have four templars in my family, I relate to this .
My ESTP father was known for buying rounds for his buddies at the bar, even when he didn't have enough money to pay for his family. While entertaining, he had a special form of cruelty for each of his family members. He called his mother, an ENTP, fake and shallow. He liked to tell my ISFJ mom that he had another family, which he thought was hilarious. Playing me and my brother off one another was a source of nearly constant amusement for him at home. People often underestimate the intellect of ESTPs. My father was vicious and brilliant.
This video helped me understand his struggles and behavior better. Thank you!
Is it better to be alone and focus on yourself and building yourself up so someday others may desire you or to try to work on building yourself up while trying to fix a broken relationship to balance out love and work and to avoid loneliness and isolation and do both at the same time?
Im a ENFJ and damn that makes sense… I was just like that, until my dad goes to the hospital back at the covid time. Now I still do this but I think about what happened back them and change, but its hard and a endless on going work
Another thing
They have Self - righteousness victimization.
Truth!
I have a question about this. Do you think these types do this cuz at some place they feel like they were granted for (in the beginning parts of a relationship, like the attention not being reciprocated) and so they get salty and hold grudges about it which eventually shows when the new person actually gives them attention?
Ik two infj guys and both of them felt neglected a lot and started lashing out later. Even on the internet i see stories that suggest this.
I feel like once the templar finds someone that reciprocates their energy pretty well (and this is almost always silver pairs), their whole world is that particular delta quadra person.
Other types who are neglected don't react this way. Templar types are just immature, childish and entitled.
@@SS-bu8ez dont care about generalizations. I think of blatant typism as stupid.
@Aladdout This is just my personal experience with Templars, especially the ones in my family and friends. I'm sick of them.
@@SS-bu8ez that's fair and i sympathize with having shitty family but be careful of generalizing everyone.
Sometimes it's that sometimes it's us
My ISTP has never placed anyone above me. (INTJ wife).
Maybe I would say he would place himself always above me. 😂
Same coupling here, intj-istp. Congrats, we have a lesser-known great combination = )
looking pretty slick today chase 👍🏼
I know you don't think I'm istp
But I don't quite agree with this reason, maybe cause Stefani has fi critic she thinks about worthlessness more, but I just see people, I already get a bit afraid so i try to be nice and when i succeed in making them like me, it's like oh god, I can breathe now
And yes, people remember.🙁
that's frightening
This one hit hard 💯
17:45 probably really the story of my life if I am judging my psychology truthfully. I could add that the main problem for me not fixing my problems with others feels like I would be the one taking the first step (even though I am maybe not but I am unaware of it?) and not others and I am sick that my actions seem as if they are not being reciprocated ever really.
Why don't you set boundaries with those people and enforce the consequences of people violating those boundaries then? I struggle with doing this too as an ISFJ so I'm guilty as well but when I read and see you have an explanation as to why you're not changing and fixing something and pointing at others for their lack of action or doing things wrong it sounds to me like it's an excuse and helping while keeping score in the relationships to get something in return for helping.
My oldest brother is an INFJ, and is constantly lying to himself, and hates everyone, except for me, in his family
How?
Welp, siblings are essentially comrades who survived a war like hostile environment named family. I am also closest to my sister than my parents.
Wow you’re right, maybe that’s why I want to move out so badly
5:41 wow, I came here to learn about Templar's behavior and I ended up resonating with this... I used to love videogames but idk what happened, my mind just started to have those types of thoughts
-INTP
What’s better for an infj; to be lonely or to hangout with meh people
A lot of My parents are Bad Victim Hood going on. Silly rabbits.
Life used to be so much more brutal than now. Pampered Humans. INTP Out.
I Dig the Real talk , refreshing.
Worshiping the idols of the fathers!
Those kids doin those poses thoo. Wut would their type be chase?
For me, we should not prioritize anything over your lifelong partner, whether you are a woman, or a man
I have to run away one last time, this one’s too far gone I’ve failed too miserably
It is painful being around our own family
You’re so funny sometimes. I love your content but I truly do not see the miopic train of frustration you have with these types, really ENFJ and INFJ as viable typological information. Every type, as to your credit you did acknowledge at the onset, is just as bad at abusing others with essentially the same patterns. For instance, I(INFJ) have seen these exact patterns to the T with my ENTP mentor, a highly successful man, radical neglect of those closest, isolation, people pleasing, self deception and fear of internal self identification and so on. This man was a great teacher to me and my wife(ENTJ) whom he also mentored and abused, he prayed over our wedding while we stood on the alter and still betrayed and abused us. Sun is quite an adversary, my friend. I usually just wat h your content on every other personality type except for my own as it 85% of the time feels quite biased towards the perceived faults of these specific individuals in your own life that have bore these functions. It is true much of the problems you bring up are general to what you call templars, however, the animosity is so pervasive that it is hard to see past. I say this because I truly enjoy your work and wish that I could gain an equal amount of insight into my own function stack as you provide for other types. Sin, the universal human condition,, has the same universal human dysfunction associated with it, self deception and idolatry, on all types. Good luck with your work and I would really like to meet you or talk with you one day if you had free time to do so. God bless, my friend.
Infp not Infj
Thanks, In-lightning.
Excellent Joseph!
Now chase, you got rid of your ENFJ, because she treated outsiders better than you and her family, but know you have an ESTP in her place, within whom also treats outsiders better that family members. Why so? Lol
There is that theory in psychology that the brain seeks for the familiar, chase experienced that kind of unfulfilling love when growing up from his ENFJ father whose approval he sought all the time ,its what is registered as love in his mind , makes sense that he craves for such as an adult, same kind of love given by templers where they all put others above him. Is just a repeat of his childhood where he seeks to validation from his closest people who'd rather give it to other people
Maybe because his ESTP wife puts the effort to change those attitudes while her ENFJ ex didn't care.
-ENFJ
@@JR-ow8xg Now that would be a logical reason
Is it really rational to generalize?
I think it is, here we are talking from nature, functions have specific definitions
Yeah we can get more mature, but noone ever let's go totally of a fault of theirs, they just manage it
And everything in this video is painfully true
18:00 Old Man Marley from Home Alone
Which one of these 4 types Is affected the most? How Is the scale?
ISFP - accurate for my self too. Thanks you
ISTP then
Do other people watch these videos about types not their own and think - it's crazy people actually operate that way, so glad I'm not an (insert type)? Are some types more likely to dislike hearing their type described, embarassed by it and not want to acknowledge their own strengths and weaknesses, or does every type equally love learning about themselves?
Ouch, this rings true bro
I have a question for you C S Joseph. Is the short questionnaire on your website to ascertain your MBTI ?
(A few multiple choice questions asking which groups of synonyms you resonate with the most etc. )
After giving my email, age group, sex and accepting billing terms there you pop up holding a board with said MBTI type, is this it ? You are able to tell me that from those few questions?
The result varied drastically from my official MBTI diagnosis which was so very incredibly in-depth.
I am an INFP who has just been told after a 30 second impersonal experience that in fact I’m an ESTP ! ?
Conditioning aside here, I cannot feel a connection with this.
Please could you tell me is this your way to officially diagnose one’s MBTI ?
I would dearly appreciate your response. Thank you.
Wait, why do you think you are Fire and Wind?
@@CSJosephCan I pretend I don't know my type:) What do you think my type is🙄
Now thrown into much inner conflict after having watched your videos about ESTP and INFP I relate to both very much. Not too sure which I am now ? How can this be ?
I very much like your website.
But what am I ?
One final question… are you some sort of a Virgo or an Aries ?
@@photosky14 Evidently a rather obnoxious one.
@@peachpotter I'll take that as a compliment:)
I don't know why, but I think he's looking like Chris Cornell in this video 🤔 maybe Chris Cornell was also an ENTP 🤷🏼♀️
Just need to read the comments to a know that there's rant coming
It's not hard for me (I'm 29 yr old male) to understand that all women in relationships with men may not necessarily make their man a top priority in every situation. Then again I'm not religious, so I suppose the Bible verse you provided wouldn't be a factor for me (I hadn't heard that verse til just now)
You were doing good until minute 19. This doesn’t apply to me. I don’t avoid my family because they remind me of my failures, who the fk cares about failures, I’m human, of course I’m going to fail. I avoid my family because I don’t like the ways they treat(Ed) me, I have lots of memories of them failing me or me feeling pain because of what they did or didn’t do. And I don’t want to be around them because they don’t change. I also don’t want the small talk, the questions, the interaction. I don’t. I’m far from perfect but I do have a good character, I’ve worked very hard on improving myself on the inside. So, no, you got this wrong … for me anyway.
And when I’m in a committed relationship with a man, he gets most of my time and attention if he wants it. And if I do a behavior that he doesn’t like, all he has to do is tell me, make me understand what I’m doing and why he doesn’t want me to do it anymore, and I’ll change.
Read those books.
@@CSJoseph I finished them:)
I don’t even think being a hypocrite is a bad thing. Is it bad to give people good advice even if you don’t take it? I give people good advice all the time without taking it myself and it helps them. So sure I’m a hypocrite, good
It is a bad thing because though the advice given by anyone can be true and helpful and people can benefit from it it says a lot about the person who is giving the advice and holding others to a standard that they are not willing to follow. It makes anyone that does this an entitled and self-righteous coward because they choose fail their own standards that they are trying to make others follow and its a sign of weakness and immaturity as well. It's one thing to not meet your own standard by accident or in some heated emotional moment but if someone is willfully and knowingly breaking their own standard then it's pretty cowardly and weak if you ask me.
@@redadventurer3552 or maybe it shows that someone cares about others and wants them to be good and happy but might not have that same perspective for themselves because of fi critic. Obviously some instances of hypocrisy are bad but are you really arguing that every instance of hypocrisy is bad? So telling a friend they should get a girlfriend because it would make them happier is a bad thing because I don’t have a girlfriend? Or telling a friend they should exercise is bad if you don’t exercise? That doesn’t make any sense. Giving people good advice is a good thing whether you follow it yourself or not because you’re still helping others and doing no harm to them. “Makes me weak” or maybe I just have fi critic.
First off when you say you don't have a girlfriend/boyfriend because of fi critic is no excuse not to take action to cure for yourself (I'm an ISFJ so I would know this because I too have fi critic). I never said giving someone good advice despite being hypocritical is bad because anyone can give good advice (a homeless person on the street can tell me that I should save money so I don't go broke and homeless as well. There's no judgement on the homeless persons part because maybe he's trying tog et out of a funk or maybe he's consciously choosing to be homeless just to get unemployment benefits or because he wants people to feel sorry for him and save him. The point is it if it's good advice then it's good advice regardless if the person giving the advice is practicing what they preach. My issue is the fact that when you say I don't do things possibly because of fi critic or I don't have the same perspective for myself and yet I want to make the other person happy I must ask why are you not following your own advice if you know being in that kind of relationship would make you happy. I know you can say because I want the other person to be happy and not be suffering like me but you do realize that you need to help yourself before you can help others. Like chase has said in the past you cannot help others unless you help yourself first (he said "love" instead of "help" but you get the idea). Why aren't you following your own sound advice if you know it's helpful to others. It's not bad to give good advice to others if you are struggling to uphold that standard (that happens to everyone including myself). But when you say you are consciously and purposefully not following your own advice that you are giving to people I question that immensely. Are you trying to help people in the hopes that they will help you in response without saying it by showing them how helpful you are in the hopes that they'll save you from your suffering all caused by your fi critic and how badly it makes you feel about yourself. No offense but it just sounds like an excuse and a way to garner sympathy from people even and to self validate without taking responsibility for caring for yourself. Especially because I know from experience that no one cares what contributions you or I do for others because everyone should be helping each other out and holding each other to the same standards that we should practice ourselves. Telling someone good advice and choosing to not follow that advice and justifying the inaction with the excuse that others deserve better than me all to possibly garner indifferent sympathy from others.
@redadventurer3552 ok so now we agree I guess, being a hypocrite isn’t inherently wrong or bad. Obviously there are bad ways of being a hypocrite, but being a hypocrite in itself is not bad. That’s all I’m trying to argue really and it seems we agree. And whether you want to accept this or not, fi critic is a relevant factor in why I don’t always take my own advice. The other factor would be se inferior, I’m a little scared to talk to girls even though I’ve always been smooth. But I don’t see why me not taking my own advice, for whatever reason, would automatically make it not okay to give others if I’m respectful with how I present it.
@Nicholas Williams you not taking your own advice and yet giving it to others is not the problem as the advice is sound. The advice is good but the issue still lies in the fact that you aren't deciding to follow your own standards or advice. It has nothing to do with the advice because hypocrites can give good advice and yet not follow it for whatever reason. Hypocrisy in itself is not an issue especially if it's things someone is hypocritical about that they are not aware of and may be unconsciously doing or don't have enough self awareness for. I have Ne inferior so I struggle with talking to people for fear of not being desired (form of rejection fear if I'm willing to admit it) so I understand the se inferior. I understand the fi inferior problem of not taking responsibility for myself because I feel and about myself. Yet if I'm being honest for myself and with everyone that has these issue and these inferior function issues all of these things are flat out EXCUSES for not taking care of our issues. Excuses and justifications and rationalizations are not going to make the problems go away. And no one is going to care enough about our personal problems other than ourselves because it's our personal responsibility to take care of them. Saying I don't feel good about myself because of fi critic and saying I don't deserve good things in life because I feel bad about myself and so I'm going to raise everyone up above me and hope they feel just as bad about me as I do myself on a regular basis (it's a self righteous pity party to get attention at the end of the day and I know this because I've done this too). Self righteous pity parties in order to get attention from people that really don't care about anyone's problems aren't going to make things better. Neither is saying I can't take action because of my fear of being unwanted or your fear of performing badly in front of others. These sre again justifications and excuses to not take care of personal responsibilities and one responsibility that is a priority is to care for ourselves like we do for others (which admittedly I struggle with too as well). At the end of the day the pity parties, justifications, excuses, and pointing fingers at others is not going to make things better.
And also being a hypocrite is not itself a problem as like I said hypocrites can give sound advice that is good to follow and if someone is not following their advice do to lack of self awareness then that's fine and there is no problem with that. However if you are aware of what you are not doing right and are consciously choosing to do the wrong thing then it is not okay and it's just a case of avoiding taking cate if yourself and your responsibilities and yet wanting others to do things that we won't do ourselves which is almost always due to our own fears. Hypocrisy in itself is not an issue. Self aware Hypocrisy, however, is and I'm just being honest it's clear you are aware of what you are doing wrong and yet are choosing to continue doing the wrong thing and are using your own psychological problems ( fi critic and se inferior) to justifiy and rationalize on why you should continue doing the things you are doing that you are aware are wrong. And that I do have a problem with quite frankly because it means everything you are doing is 100% intentional and yet it's expecting others to be thankful for your advice that you won't follow. When people see that they automatically assume that you are forcing a standard on them that you won't follow and will think you are forcing or persuading them to do things you won't follow (especially when someone is conscious of what they are and are not doing).
***S M A S H the LIKE***
It makes sense though, why would I spend the majority of my time creating loyalty with people who are already loyal, when I could spend more time expanding my loyalty circle. Not that I don’t want to spend time with my family, I’m always down to hangout with my brothers. But yeah I don’t put up the same performance I would with strangers and that’s just built in my with se inferior.
INTJ has mentored me, and I have mentored an INFJ
These templars have a zero-sum game mentality. 😂 pathetic
everytime you comment it's always something stupid.
@@aladdout9454 😏
Zero sum thinking with relationships is stupid and unfair
@@redadventurer3552 I agree with you, but I think she is a wayfarer so it makes sense
@@aladdout9454she's proud of it apparently 😂
Who hurt you now?!
The first lecture made about this was how alpha quadra is abusive. Me and a few others requested it to be produced for other quadras too. Some of us aren't as offended when it doesn't apply to us. And it doesn't hurt to be warned through others' stories.
Cope
I deleted the other post. I know Chase is good and means well.
Wow
12:00
Templars can run on empty, so in order to fill their cup when the conditions around them are not filling their cup, they need meditation to charge their batteries (white noise/ pink noise with a timer is easiest) and semen retention for men. - INFJ success story here. This can ABSOLUTELY accelerate the process. When their cup is more full they will also be able to recognize by contrast the necessary improvements to be made instead of having no contrast by which to recognize emptiness if they are empty themselves. Meditation and semen retention are also the best way to counteract Ni-burnout. The meditation also helps attention span. Become the cup that runneth over!🏆🌊🎢🎉🎉