The part about men and women is so spot on. A lot of women think men don’t need to be handled with care and don’t need love or respect, because society shapes us to believe men don’t have feelings or that their feelings should be dismissed. Yes men are more predisposed to be strong but they’re humans who need to feel loved and respected like anyone else at the end of the day.
as an infj my take on this is: he loves you if he consistently deals with and defeats his ne-nemesis trust issues. why is this such a big thing for us? my theory our unconcious is enfp-heart temple, so we derive passion by giving you opportunities for you to feel worthy, safe and protected. All we need: truth. Tell us all facts, how you feel, especially if it doesnt benefit you. Ti-child needs that common playground . Because we are affiliative plus abstract plus have te trickster we find higher purpose in everything, especially in uncomfortable truths. if you do something that is morally in a grey zone, for most people its okay because grey is not black right? for infjs its not, because grey is not white. From our perspective: we putting effort into you (si demon or angel) its abusive for us if you dont play with open hands, especially if you have fi hero. It triggers Ne-nemesis and it leads to us overinterpreting signals of your se-trickster you dont even realize you sent out. infjs man are attracted to infps for their fi-hero, so for their authentic individual morals and si child for obvious reasons. Dont let your ni critic get in your way to "fight for your freedom" and go down the feminist rabbit hole and see the infj as a threat to it, they can be the biggest asset, because you hate the truth we just love to play with it, and turn your ti pessimistic demon to ti optimistic angel
The same thing happens in reverse, when a woman is in love she lets herself be led, you can see this happen naturally in the beginning of a romance. Oftentimes she will retreat into her masculine when the man is not providing safety, leading the relationship and his own life. This is an especially delicate balance when you have Ne hero men and Ni hero women. It’s easy for Ne hero to follow wimps for fun and end up addicted to curiosity loops. The level of frustration a Ni hero feels being led that way is HUGE! I believe this goes for man and women in both professional and romantic relationships btw. As Ni hero women we are giving a lot when we’re simply following a man’s lead, oftentimes men don’t realize they have a tiger on an emotional leash, when we’re not properly led we either go out on own way or we get really scary. No wonder we feel so unloved by our golden pair.
I haven’t been in a pedagogue romantic relationship, I’ve had a professional relationship where my boss was an ENTP and it was, despite the challenges, the longest I’ve been working for someone else and the job I had that provided the most growth. I had worked for an ENFP before but ENTP literally stole me 😅 with a better offer.
Love, love your answer. 100% agree. I am an ESTJ and I am marrying an ISTP. However, one caveat. The golden pair does not make you feel unloved. Depending on your nurture, you might have to undo some learning in order to work with this pairing. My ISTP and I had to get through a lot (we were both married previously to INFPs) but we have hung in there and are doing great. I had to get off my high, Miss Independent horse routine. He leads and I now allow him too.
@@NotCJ95 I always keep hearing about a female INFJ, or female INTJ being married to a male INTP, but never the other way around which is my situation. I’m the female INTP whom is married to a male INTJ. I’m the more laid back, and hubby is more of the anxious and nervous type, whom is always in a rush. Anyways … who is the ragey one, the INTP, or the INFJ?
@@sylviaowega3839 infj is definitely the ragey one! Haha she will throw full-on tantrums and her INTP hubby will just kind of outlast/try to deescalate her. I am INFP and growing up, she said I was the only one who understood that she just needed to react and be angry for a moment. When she gets angry, I give her that space. It’s like a system they have. You can be there, but she generally doesn’t want you to try and make it better.
@@NotCJ95 Very interesting. Well … I’m a female INTP, and my oldest brother is a male INFJ, and is quite ragey, and has had mood swings since he was a kid. I’m the only family member that he still talks to, because he knows that I will listen to his rants and give him space and clear out of the way when he gets angry. My INFJ friend is on the other hand never gets angry, and goes through moments when she’ll talk a storm
lol...my intp friend also slowly de-escalates my mood swings and always has the best thing, occasionally absolutely the wrong things to say(which just makes me SO SO ragey...that idk how to even deal with such a ridiculous and irrational mood so i do a complete 180° and quickly calm down, very fascinating) His anger on the other hand, is usually just venting and venting and venting (noone can out-talk an open intp imo) and needing continuous feedback and reassuring eventho it feels repetitive. Your guys' comments made me laugh.
Thanks to the Irresistibly Feminine book, I understand what true leadership is and what true submission is and the importance of polarity in a committed relationship. Personally the most difficult challenge for me (as an INTJ woman) would be the trusting part and getting afraid that me leaving my heart fully open will lead to my feelings getting hurt way too much. Even though I’m an INTJ, I am still a sensitive person so other people’s negative or rude words to me can hurt me especially if I was expressing my emotions. For instance this one guy (INTP) who used to be my friend/coworker noticed that I was crying silently and him not knowing or asking what I was going through or caring about me as a friend, he immediately jumped at the chance to mock me, call me too sensitive and ask me ‘WhY Are YOu CrYinG? WiPE YoUR TEaRS’ The next day, I told him how upset and angry I was for his rudeness and lack of empathy. He laughed at me and said, ‘Ha, I never knew you were that sensitive.’ and long story short, I immediately stopped talking to him and treated him as if he didn’t exist anymore. It’s experiences like that that make women so guarded because some guys out there get a kick out of seeing women being depressed, upset or struggling. However, I know it’s not all men and that some ppl out there have the capacity to care about people’s feelings. It takes a LOT of trust for a woman to express her vulnerability to her man. I finished that book in 2 days and now about to buy the next book in the series. ❤❤❤
Another great video! I appreciate that you shared your own struggles when reading Zak Roedde's books. It kind of humanizes your teachings to the audience. I'm sure when I am reading the books there will be many tough pills to swallow for me too.
Omg! That is so true. I myself was taught how a man should treat me, in lieu of how to treat me. My dad would just advice me never to chase a man being female
Infj's are 100% transactional in everything they do, and they're so stupid they think what they "give" others is "true love". Psshh, no it's not. It's infj currency to buy companionship because if they didn't bribe people with their emotional blood letting nobody would tolerate them.
Thank you my friend. Well done, having an ENTJ wife as an INFJ, it is no surprise that the issue of Biblical marriage(Husband dominance and Wife submission,again BIBLICALLY) has been the defining aspect and struggle of all of our victories and the beauty of our bond. Thank you again, God bless.
@@aladdout9454 Like I have to go raw as hell demon INFJ dragon tiger spirit warrior super saiyan 777 om her ass from time to time, but mostly Im my normal overly serious yet oddly friendly self and she is sweeter than most ENTJ's due to her adaptations and focus on her inferior while being a great wife, being extremely organized and focused on keeping her home in tip top running order. We all have our bad days but we're bothe martial artist so we both warriors on a high level, we whoop ass 89% of the time. lol thanks for asking
Thanx for sharing this, because im afraid that if i share my feelings then he will not listen, or take me seriously... And as you said it's from my past experience, and it was truly painful..😓 /Infp 5w4
I’m confused as to how I could express what I want/feel without making it about an outcome. Like instead of saying “I wish we spent more time together.” Should I say “I want to see you more?” Or is it more like “I miss you all the time” 😂 sometimes I wish I had a script. I guess I’d mess that up too. INFPs really need to be with people who enjoy love-letters.
Very much appreciated for this video Chase! My upbringing had lots of moral principals but also felt I couldn't make mistakes or not allowed to do things without a esfj taking over any task you try and complete. ( It's feels bad , why bother if it's not perfect.) Works better for sfps or ntjs just not for me. ( I don't blame my parents either, I know it comes from a place of love. But I wasn't really allowed to express how I felt without taking a hit to my fi or knowing the predicted outcomes to asking any questions the answer is NO.)
chase, i feel your video intro and outro sound is little bit higher that content of the video, so sometimes i have to do volume down when playing intro then volume up when content is started. great lecture chase❤️
Very interesting. After reading the book you recommended, I noticed I’ve already been doing the majority of things mentioned in the book with a few exceptions. Why does this come naturally to certain types of women, culture? I’m an ESFP, not the most feminine type I think.
The way I know if a man is mine in a sense that I have won his heart if he satisfies the following criteria: a) he trusts me with his feeling; b) he cares for my feelings and is respectful to them; c) he talks to me.
@@malakashraf2801 INTPs don't usually ask for much. I'm a minimalist myself who earns above average income. The stuff I ask for is pretty low bar. The amazing thing is there are plenty of vvomen who can't even meet it in the western world. I'm pretty sure with Sylvia her expectations aren't that high either. Probably one of the least low maintenance vvomen around are INTP vvomen.
@@mrod8578 I actually understand I am fe inf too Although I think ni even demands more than si But I am speaking after learning my lesson, it's not that you want a lot, it's that they have to know that you want things If you treat yourself as less worthy they will too
@@malakashraf2801 Yeah it's a problem. I don't view myself as less worthy but it can come off as passive not caring about what you want most of the time. It's more like I want other people to have what they want. As for worthiness I actually think I'm fairly worthy. On paper I'm a decent catch physically and career wise.
“The only way a woman abandons you is if she has sex with another man” If this is what it means to abandon a man, what does abandoning look like for the woman? Would it be the same thing?
Kind of skimming over the biological differences that sex suggest, as an INFJ, if I am not going out of my way to find a solution for both of us, then I truly don't care. And less so if I take no initiative in coming up with a solution. Other than that, yes, I like to dot on my partner's. But I tend not to if the interactions seemed forced or a particular outcome is expected...it feels wholly inauthentic. As per the binary of polarity, because I do identify as gay, I find the dynamic to be a little trickier because now both partners are assuming the role of aggressor. The topics you bring up are thought provoking indeed, I would love to explore a discourse on the psychology of it all.
What if a man invests in a woman beside his current partner, and act as he loves her, tries to fix her problems, listens to her etc. Mr. Joseph will you talk about men vs women infidelity vs cheating in more detail. I forgot to ask, should she open her heart in a situation like this? My guess is probably not.
He is just using you because is bored and giving you crumbs so you don’t leave , the moment you get fed up , and believe me you will , He will just look for another one like nothing happened and she will feel like you, right now.
@@Susana-yg6hkYeah. No woman should accept crumbles. Thank God I never gave real chance to men like these. I am aware that only a man who is willing to commit can have me. It's always been like that. I hope women open their eyes and start valuing themselves in this feminist society. Like the other day I read feminist women are exploring their options in order to have the best genes for their children. Wrong.
Men are suited for more than one partner If he gave you his word that's a different thing But also I doubt you talked about it But also some people are just nymphomaniac
@@malakashraf2801 I don't know about nymphomaniac, I just read about feminist women justifying their acts. Well my point of view that even if men are suited for more than one woman, that's the woman's choice to accept it or not. I just wrote the comment to bring light to situations where a woman should not open her heart.
Write that book, Chase. Do it.
A guy cant even get his own type right, you want him to type a god damn book, what a dissaster
@@BigPapa64469 he’s got his type right, and he’s got a lot more stuff right. Maybe reverify things before making claims like that.
Yeah i can help! 🤣 /Infp
What he know needs to be recorded in print. I’m going to take things from him for my book.
Yea I will give credit where it’s due.
The part about men and women is so spot on. A lot of women think men don’t need to be handled with care and don’t need love or respect, because society shapes us to believe men don’t have feelings or that their feelings should be dismissed. Yes men are more predisposed to be strong but they’re humans who need to feel loved and respected like anyone else at the end of the day.
as an infj my take on this is: he loves you if he consistently deals with and defeats his ne-nemesis trust issues.
why is this such a big thing for us? my theory
our unconcious is enfp-heart temple, so we derive passion by giving you opportunities for you to feel worthy, safe and protected.
All we need: truth. Tell us all facts, how you feel, especially if it doesnt benefit you. Ti-child needs that common playground . Because we are affiliative plus abstract plus have te trickster we find higher purpose in everything, especially in uncomfortable truths.
if you do something that is morally in a grey zone, for most people its okay because grey is not black right? for infjs its not, because grey is not white. From our perspective: we putting effort into you (si demon or angel) its abusive for us if you dont play with open hands, especially if you have fi hero. It triggers Ne-nemesis and it leads to us overinterpreting signals of your se-trickster you dont even realize you sent out.
infjs man are attracted to infps for their fi-hero, so for their authentic individual morals and si child for obvious reasons.
Dont let your ni critic get in your way to "fight for your freedom" and go down the feminist rabbit hole and see the infj as a threat to it, they can be the biggest asset, because you hate the truth we just love to play with it, and turn your ti pessimistic demon to ti optimistic angel
The same thing happens in reverse, when a woman is in love she lets herself be led, you can see this happen naturally in the beginning of a romance. Oftentimes she will retreat into her masculine when the man is not providing safety, leading the relationship and his own life.
This is an especially delicate balance when you have Ne hero men and Ni hero women. It’s easy for Ne hero to follow wimps for fun and end up addicted to curiosity loops. The level of frustration a Ni hero feels being led that way is HUGE! I believe this goes for man and women in both professional and romantic relationships btw.
As Ni hero women we are giving a lot when we’re simply following a man’s lead, oftentimes men don’t realize they have a tiger on an emotional leash, when we’re not properly led we either go out on own way or we get really scary.
No wonder we feel so unloved by our golden pair.
Pedagouge is worse
Because atleast golden have te
I haven’t been in a pedagogue romantic relationship, I’ve had a professional relationship where my boss was an ENTP and it was, despite the challenges, the longest I’ve been working for someone else and the job I had that provided the most growth. I had worked for an ENFP before but ENTP literally stole me 😅 with a better offer.
Love, love your answer. 100% agree. I am an ESTJ and I am marrying an ISTP. However, one caveat. The golden pair does not make you feel unloved. Depending on your nurture, you might have to undo some learning in order to work with this pairing. My ISTP and I had to get through a lot (we were both married previously to INFPs) but we have hung in there and are doing great. I had to get off my high, Miss Independent horse routine. He leads and I now allow him too.
For me, polarity is the honest and vulnerable expression of our introverted functions.
A man has to value you and think you are attractive but most men will value you if you validate, appreciate, listen and show love to your man.
Truth! Learned that with my ISTP.
Btw in my opinion as an INTP woman, that the MBTI type that is most suitable for me is the male INFJ.
My sister is INFJ and is married to INTP male 😊 good pairing-make sure you do your best to communicate and be patient when they get ragey
@@NotCJ95 I always keep hearing about a female INFJ, or female INTJ being married to a male INTP, but never the other way around which is my situation. I’m the female INTP whom is married to a male INTJ. I’m the more laid back, and hubby is more of the anxious and nervous type, whom is always in a rush.
Anyways … who is the ragey one, the INTP, or the INFJ?
@@sylviaowega3839 infj is definitely the ragey one! Haha she will throw full-on tantrums and her INTP hubby will just kind of outlast/try to deescalate her. I am INFP and growing up, she said I was the only one who understood that she just needed to react and be angry for a moment. When she gets angry, I give her that space. It’s like a system they have. You can be there, but she generally doesn’t want you to try and make it better.
@@NotCJ95 Very interesting. Well … I’m a female INTP, and my oldest brother is a male INFJ, and is quite ragey, and has had mood swings since he was a kid. I’m the only family member that he still talks to, because he knows that I will listen to his rants and give him space and clear out of the way when he gets angry. My INFJ friend is on the other hand never gets angry, and goes through moments when she’ll talk a storm
lol...my intp friend also slowly de-escalates my mood swings and always has the best thing, occasionally absolutely the wrong things to say(which just makes me SO SO ragey...that idk how to even deal with such a ridiculous and irrational mood so i do a complete 180° and quickly calm down, very fascinating)
His anger on the other hand, is usually just venting and venting and venting (noone can out-talk an open intp imo) and needing continuous feedback and reassuring eventho it feels repetitive. Your guys' comments made me laugh.
as an infp I love infjs
🥺❤️ the feeling is mutual
@@aladdout9454 ☺️💓
Thanks to the Irresistibly Feminine book, I understand what true leadership is and what true submission is and the importance of polarity in a committed relationship. Personally the most difficult challenge for me (as an INTJ woman) would be the trusting part and getting afraid that me leaving my heart fully open will lead to my feelings getting hurt way too much. Even though I’m an INTJ, I am still a sensitive person so other people’s negative or rude words to me can hurt me especially if I was expressing my emotions. For instance this one guy (INTP) who used to be my friend/coworker noticed that I was crying silently and him not knowing or asking what I was going through or caring about me as a friend, he immediately jumped at the chance to mock me, call me too sensitive and ask me ‘WhY Are YOu CrYinG? WiPE YoUR TEaRS’
The next day, I told him how upset and angry I was for his rudeness and lack of empathy. He laughed at me and said, ‘Ha, I never knew you were that sensitive.’ and long story short, I immediately stopped talking to him and treated him as if he didn’t exist anymore. It’s experiences like that that make women so guarded because some guys out there get a kick out of seeing women being depressed, upset or struggling. However, I know it’s not all men and that some ppl out there have the capacity to care about people’s feelings.
It takes a LOT of trust for a woman to express her vulnerability to her man.
I finished that book in 2 days and now about to buy the next book in the series. ❤❤❤
Another great video! I appreciate that you shared your own struggles when reading Zak Roedde's books. It kind of humanizes your teachings to the audience. I'm sure when I am reading the books there will be many tough pills to swallow for me too.
Omg! That is so true. I myself was taught how a man should treat me, in lieu of how to treat me. My dad would just advice me never to chase a man being female
INFJs: bust their butts taking care of you and invest in you and protect you
Their partner: “i DoN’t KnOw WhEtHeR hE lOvEs Me!”
Are you INFJ or ESTP?
@@KingdomPersonalties prolly SD/SF INFJ.
It is confusing sometimes 😅
Infj's are 100% transactional in everything they do, and they're so stupid they think what they "give" others is "true love".
Psshh, no it's not. It's infj currency to buy companionship because if they didn't bribe people with their emotional blood letting nobody would tolerate them.
My fellow subconscious focused man. 😂 Big ups to you.
Yeah i get too surprised and hurt to even retaliate when someone says this
I hope you wrote a book ! Great content fs!
Thank you my friend. Well done, having an ENTJ wife as an INFJ, it is no surprise that the issue of Biblical marriage(Husband dominance and Wife submission,again BIBLICALLY) has been the defining aspect and struggle of all of our victories and the beauty of our bond. Thank you again, God bless.
lmao, whats ur dynamic like?
@@aladdout9454 Like I have to go raw as hell demon INFJ dragon tiger spirit warrior super saiyan 777 om her ass from time to time, but mostly Im my normal overly serious yet oddly friendly self and she is sweeter than most ENTJ's due to her adaptations and focus on her inferior while being a great wife, being extremely organized and focused on keeping her home in tip top running order. We all have our bad days but we're bothe martial artist so we both warriors on a high level, we whoop ass 89% of the time. lol thanks for asking
Thanx for sharing this, because im afraid that if i share my feelings then he will not listen, or take me seriously... And as you said it's from my past experience, and it was truly painful..😓
/Infp 5w4
I’m confused as to how I could express what I want/feel without making it about an outcome. Like instead of saying “I wish we spent more time together.” Should I say “I want to see you more?” Or is it more like “I miss you all the time” 😂 sometimes I wish I had a script. I guess I’d mess that up too. INFPs really need to be with people who enjoy love-letters.
You should talk Zak into recording an audiobook version, Chase.
Appreciate the episode. Good stuff
Just not his own voice
@@malakashraf2801 😂💛
Very much appreciated for this video Chase! My upbringing had lots of moral principals but also felt I couldn't make mistakes or not allowed to do things without a esfj taking over any task you try and complete. ( It's feels bad , why bother if it's not perfect.) Works better for sfps or ntjs just not for me. ( I don't blame my parents either, I know it comes from a place of love. But I wasn't really allowed to express how I felt without taking a hit to my fi or knowing the predicted outcomes to asking any questions the answer is NO.)
Me when I can't read a 40 pages book at one setting 🙂
Same lol
chase, i feel your video intro and outro sound is little bit higher that content of the video,
so sometimes i have to do volume down when playing intro then volume up when content is started.
great lecture chase❤️
Very interesting. After reading the book you recommended, I noticed I’ve already been doing the majority of things mentioned in the book with a few exceptions. Why does this come naturally to certain types of women, culture? I’m an ESFP, not the most feminine type I think.
The way I know if a man is mine in a sense that I have won his heart if he satisfies the following criteria: a) he trusts me with his feeling; b) he cares for my feelings and is respectful to them; c) he talks to me.
These are very low standards my lady
@@malakashraf2801 INTPs don't usually ask for much. I'm a minimalist myself who earns above average income. The stuff I ask for is pretty low bar. The amazing thing is there are plenty of vvomen who can't even meet it in the western world. I'm pretty sure with Sylvia her expectations aren't that high either. Probably one of the least low maintenance vvomen around are INTP vvomen.
@@mrod8578 I actually understand
I am fe inf too
Although I think ni even demands more than si
But I am speaking after learning my lesson, it's not that you want a lot, it's that they have to know that you want things
If you treat yourself as less worthy they will too
@@malakashraf2801 you're busy in here today lol
@@malakashraf2801 Yeah it's a problem. I don't view myself as less worthy but it can come off as passive not caring about what you want most of the time. It's more like I want other people to have what they want. As for worthiness I actually think I'm fairly worthy. On paper I'm a decent catch physically and career wise.
“The only way a woman abandons you is if she has sex with another man” If this is what it means to abandon a man, what does abandoning look like for the woman? Would it be the same thing?
hello , I love the content that you are sharing in this channel
Yes, she wants you to care about her feelings then you decide the solution/outcome.
Obviously depends on the situation still
Cause you may not consider her emotions and want to come up with logical solutions.
Kind of skimming over the biological differences that sex suggest, as an INFJ, if I am not going out of my way to find a solution for both of us, then I truly don't care. And less so if I take no initiative in coming up with a solution.
Other than that, yes, I like to dot on my partner's. But I tend not to if the interactions seemed forced or a particular outcome is expected...it feels wholly inauthentic.
As per the binary of polarity, because I do identify as gay, I find the dynamic to be a little trickier because now both partners are assuming the role of aggressor.
The topics you bring up are thought provoking indeed, I would love to explore a discourse on the psychology of it all.
Why does ENTP men gets offended when i want them to take lead in the relationship
How are you doing it?
i think he’s just feminine , an entp can still take masculine lead .
Societal conditioning
Felt emasculated
Fe felt unappreciated
They are feminine, si inferior senses everything to be a bad experience
I look forward to your book
If You write a book I’m getting that ASAP
What if a man invests in a woman beside his current partner, and act as he loves her, tries to fix her problems, listens to her etc. Mr. Joseph will you talk about men vs women infidelity vs cheating in more detail. I forgot to ask, should she open her heart in a situation like this? My guess is probably not.
He is just using you because is bored and giving you crumbs so you don’t leave , the moment you get fed up , and believe me you will , He will just look for another one like nothing happened and she will feel like you, right now.
@@Susana-yg6hkYeah. No woman should accept crumbles. Thank God I never gave real chance to men like these. I am aware that only a man who is willing to commit can have me. It's always been like that. I hope women open their eyes and start valuing themselves
in this feminist society. Like the other day I read feminist women are exploring their options in order to have the best genes for their children. Wrong.
Men are suited for more than one partner
If he gave you his word that's a different thing
But also I doubt you talked about it
But also some people are just nymphomaniac
@@malakashraf2801 I don't know about nymphomaniac, I just read about feminist women justifying their acts. Well my point of view that even if men are suited for more than one woman, that's the woman's choice to accept it or not. I just wrote the comment to bring light to situations where a woman should not open her heart.
@@photosky14 well technically this is one where she can, but depends on the deal, and chase made videos about this in season 31
It's weird. I started with exactly don't let her lead. I was curious about it.
What is the name of the Book and Author ?
yeah I couldn't quite make out the last name and guess how to spell them so couldn't find the author
Chase if enfps are dogs then what are entps as animals ? Serious question. 🤣
Certainly hyenas.
Most likely fox. Think about their characteristics and how they relate to entp. Also, as an ENTP, I have always been drawn to foxes
100th comment for my 100th reason to dominate the world 🌍🔥🔥🔥💯
😐🤔
Wow this got to me 😅
@@nothingpersonal7091 who said it was a bad thing, loved the video
Where do you live? Paltry lack of diversity there.
???
Write A Book and I will Buy It (;