How to talk respectfully about autism (person-first language vs identity-first)
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- Опубліковано 14 лип 2024
- I'm often asked what is the best language to use when talking about autism.
Autistic person or person with autism? or something else?
The debate between person-first language and identity-first language is still going on to this day.
The issue is actually a lot more complicated than most people think.
00:00 - Intro
01:00 - What language should I use? (quick answer)
01:26 - Example: Your Language Preference
02:20 - Why do we care?
02:47 - Common Trends
04:14 - Why so much disagreement?
07:14 - How to use the best language (3 simple steps)
08:30 - Industry Best Practice (from leading organisation)
11:08 - Summary and Key Points
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I have Asperger’s and I enjoy building game boys and I enjoy riding my bike and I don’t have friends anymore but I enjoy helping people and talking with others and being a good person like boyscouts and my parents raised me , and I enjoy trying new things and meeting new people,have a great day everyone!!
Yeah!! That sounds good to me, chere! :))
You know how to build a gameboy? Wow! That's awesome, I'm impressed!
Building gameboys sounds like a cool hobby!
@@Johnny_T779 I built a game boy advance when I was 18 and this past year when I turned 22 I built a game boy color with a clear shell A brand new screen and rechargeable batteries let me know if you guys want me to tell a story about it it’s up to you thank you all for your beautiful comments thank you all For thinking of the little guy out there have a great day everyone
Gotta agree with everyone here. Very cool hobby 🙂
It always seems awkward to me to say "person with autism", it conjures in my head the image of a person walking their autism on a leash,, like a dog 🐶. Like, I am here and, yeah, over there is my autism (good boy!). I prefer to say that I am autistic, because it is an important part of me.
Good boy, LOL made me laugh
I am the parent of a child who is Autistic. I feel strange about saying my child has Autism because it sounds like saying someone has a disease. I like the idea of saying that my child is Autistic because I want people to see that I have no issue with the Autistic part of him. A lot of so called professionals say things like a person with Autism as if though there is something wrong with the Autism part. Now, if someone prefers to be identified as a Person with Autism, then I want to completely respect that. Also, it is true that at times saying my child has Autism seems perfectly fine, because saying they are Autistic just doesn't fit into the statement that I am making. I am really glad that it is acceptable to say either someone who is Autistic, or has Autism, or is on the Spectrum are all acceptable. Thank you so much for how much you help parents like myself help our kids.
Better food = better development....try low acid, organic, gmo free, gluten free, no added sugars and no processed foods.
To be overly obsessive about language (it's one of my scmemeshmers). Autism is a disease. It fits all the criteria. Maybe the world will change, but I wouldn't hold my breath on that one.
@@curiousbystander9193 List off three foods that fit your list...
@@BullScrapPracEff here's more than 3.....cantaloupe, chevre goat cheese, asparagus, broccoli, cauliflower, brussel sprouts, cabbage, sweet and regular potato, chick pea, snow pea, onion, zuccini, yellow squash, fall squashes, corn, white rice, quinoa, GF oats, local eggs, certain GF breads occasionally, lentils, beans, turkey and chicken meats occasionally.... need more?
certain foods must be organic like chick pea, oats and rice, but all if you can...... you'll find local eggs if you can get them are easier to assimilate..... food prep for some foods is a neglected science as far as bio-assimilation consideration and biome health.....that is, an improper cooked bean is toxic to your villi in your small intestines, among other things.....
not cereals, crackers, chips, or other processed food, and no added sugars...
@@BullScrapPracEff Why would you say that? Can you back up what you are saying with science?
Yet again, another respectful and well reasoned video. I've been saddened by the shift by many in the autistic community towards increasingly aggressive identitarianism. You haven't gone down that direction and have remained insightful and compassionate. Thank you so much.
May I ask what aggressive identitarianism is?
@@astrobookwormsinger seconding this question...
What precisely is "aggressive" about actively asserting that your existence is valid?
And if a group of widely marginalized, dehumanized, and infantalized people does indeed get obviously aggressive, I tend to think of it as Defensive, which is also valid.
When lgbtq folks or racial minorities get angry at protests, I don't think "gee if only they were a little more polite." No, I just have compassion for their plight and see that their emotions are valid, because they are.
I'm saddened that there isn't more compassion for justifiably angry autistic people and even more saddened by people who would demand the utmost neurotypical politeness from autistic people in their worst moments of feeling invalidated.
Yes, I feel the same way.
I think part of the trouble with identitarianism when it comes to autism is the politicization of what for some people may be a private matter; however, the primary concern for me is the assumption that we are all the same and all have the same wants and needs, where in reality, we are all quite different, have different lifestyles and lifestyle goals, and it's okay for us to think through our experiences differently, be more private in sharing our diagnoses, or assert needs that might not be representative. I think some may also fear that identitarianism leads to a fixed mindset rather than a growth mindset, though I don't know I'd that concern is imposed from the outside, since I've encountered that assumption more in non-autistic people than autistic ones. (Perhaps that last could even be seen as a kind of internalized bigotry, but that's farther than I'm willing to go, from my limited sample size.)
At any rate, these are just some thoughts on the limits of identitarianism. They are not strong beliefs. I find myself cycling in and out of that way of thinking, and I find it comforting to know both that aspects of my experience are shared and that my needs as an individual, regardless of diagnosis. I am in therapy (partly for other reasons), and I personally find I heal a lot of my shame around the specific difficulties I face because of autismwhen I am NOT identitarian but that I heal the social shame around needing accommodation when I am at moments that I strongly identify. So I suppose for me personally, identitarianism is fulfilling a need - and that's neither good nor bad. It ought to be there for people when they need it. I still prefer to understand my autism based on a more personal assessment of my needs (replete, as most people are likely replete, with many complicating factors).
@@habituscraeftig Thanks for one of the most nuanced comments I've seen on this issue! When it comes to identitarianism I see really striking similarities (even in this thread) between the issues affecting Autistic people and those affecting LGBT+ people and disabled people (and probably other oppressed groups, those are just the ones I have personal experience of). For example conflict between those who think we should be loud and proud vs. those who want to keep their identities private - the politics around privacy as a right and a legitimate personal choice (and sometimes a necessity for those in the most difficult situations) vs. the wish for privacy being seen as caving to pressure and shame, thus reinforcing the idea that our differences should be kept 'behind closed doors' so as not to disrupt the mainstream. The importance of being 'out' for representation to younger generations and to assert ourselves and our needs vs. the fact that some people are more vulnerable than others and will be adversely affected by being 'on the front lines'.
There are similar arguments about the extent to which people should feel a 'duty' to be outspoken and take part in activism. We see the same conflict between those who think we shouldn't censor ourselves to make the majority feel comfortable or minimise our struggles in order to be 'polite' and those who say "being too over-the-top will alienate the majority and we need to be more diplomatic." The conflict between those who, because of circumstance, have had an easier ride through life despite their differences, and those who have struggled more. The difference between people attempting to 'assimilate' into mainstream society who feel 'loud and awkward' activists are making that more difficult for them vs. those who see that assimilation as a 'betrayal' of those who can't or won't assimilate vs. some who find their identity and acceptance specifically in 'radical' circles and may end up going overboard in order to cement that identity, to the detriment of the overall movement. You end up with recognisable profiles such as: "I need to be an activist because I struggle so much I don't see another choice" vs. "I need to assimilate more because I struggle so much I don't see another choice" and "I don't struggle very much because I assimilate well, so I don't want that disrupted" vs "I don't struggle very much so I ought to use my privilege to take part in activism on behalf of those less fortunate."
To be clear I'm not taking sides on these arguments particularly - I tend to think there are valid aspects to all these points and the way forward lies in keeping a balance between our differing needs and priorities and continuing the conversation. The people who frustrate me the most are those (either radical or conformist) who insist the issues are simple and 'this is just how it is' and turn away from the conversation as a result.
I like identity-first for myself, it helps me to think of myself as autistic through-and-through. At the same time I accept others using whatever language they prefer with themselves.
The reason I prefer identity-first is that I, as someone who came to the realization after living almost 30 years, feel very uncomfortable when a part of me is made pathological. But I also accept that I am facing unique challenges due to "having autism." And I do use both, as the text demands. Can't use the same thing over and over again. I'm just still a bit icky about person-first, since it makes me feel like this part of me is a problem to solve without acknowledging its importance to me and my identity.
Agreed I don't want to be carved up for the comfort of others. As someone else who went undiagnossed for nearly thirty years I'm now trying to fix the damage neroutypical teachers did to me as a child by trying to force masking on me and my needs never being met. Part of that is saying I am autist the world looks and feels different to me and no one else gets a say in my comfort it's not affecting them. Now if I could just figure out what my needs actualy are.
I've heard some people say neurodivergent, is that any better? Or does it mean something else?
@@recoveringsoul755 Neurodivergent is the catchall that includes, well, all forms of neurodiversity. Be it autistic people, ADHD, dyslexics, Touretters and many many more. So it's not wrong and not "bad," it just means many other things as well.
Some people prefer to say they're neurodivergent because it draws attention away from social assumptions about specific diagnoses and allows the person to assert their difference without needing to get into the weeds. I have both Autism and ADHD, and I'm more likely to say "Aspie" (even though the category is dead) when I'm being specific and "Neurodivergent" when I'm speaking more broadly about difference. I only drag ADHD out when getting school accommodations, because for whatever reason that's more plug-and-play than the autism, even where the autism is probably more relevant.
@@habituscraeftig Good point, never looked at it from that angle. Was a bit too focused on the "loud and proud" one.
As for the ADHD being more "plug and play"... That's probably because it got much more and different media attention. With less misinformation about the causes. So institutions know better how to deal with it. Will agree though. Being autistic is likely more relevant.
I get sad when my home care providers say that Im negative, self hating and that I define myself too much with my autism when I say I’m autistic. For me, whether I like it or not, I can’t separate the autism from my personality. Everyone has good and less favorable traits and behaviors in their personality. I have good and less favorable traits and behaviors that I can clearly connect to my autism. For example, I can sometimes come off as insensitive because I don’t always understand when I’m too honest, that’s not good, but on the other hand I have strong opinions because of my autism that I think make me a better person. For example I don’t discriminate people and I care strongly about being kind to animals. So if my carer agrees my autism can be both a struggle and also give me great abilities, why is it so bad to identify with? It’s like it’s bad to say that I’m Christine. Being me is both a gift and a struggle, but then people could say ok but don’t limit yourself to being you, you can be anyone you want to be! But I’m still the same even if I would think I’m someone else. It’s the same. I am me and autism is big part of my personality weather I like it or not. The problem is.. when I say I have autism it’s like saying I have a disablitity in my leg, which I have. The leg pain doesn’t define much of who I am as a person, just a small part of my abilities, but the autism makes a huge difference in my life, personality and abilities.
I agree with you 100%!!! Only because you’re absolutely correct. Every point you made is completely logical and reasonable and in literally any other scenario would be wholeheartedly accepted. Why anyone believes it is acceptable to disagree with you by TELLING you HOW you are to refer to yourself, HOW you actually feel about yourself, and INSULT and DEGRADE you by doing so BECAUSE you dared advocate respect and objectivity for yourself is inexcusable.
Why we use a term matters. It sounds like they think if only you could see your self as "having autism" then you would just be a neurotypical with a cold, heal the cold and you're "better" [switched cold where autism would be to make a point]. They are projecting their opinion of autism onto you?
Conversely, when they hear "I'm autistic" they hear that you have "given up hope" of being neurotypical, and view it as a terminal cold, from their limited way of thinking of autism.
They think of it as a disability you have and could cure, and obviously you don't agree. Not all who use "has autism" mean it that way, so the intent matters most. Why would someone want to police the way anyone talks about their self, instead of asking if you thought of it another way/other words also?
Asking instead of telling implies you think of the other person as being an individual. Perhaps they talk at you, not with you? One reason may be because if you "have autism", it means you must control it, with the end goal of cure aka eliminating the "disease". differently than if you control a part of who you are, like being crazy for sweets or loving to talk too much, where the goal is to limit the negative side of the behaviors, not eliminate them.
You would be suppressing yourself, if you tried to change, or worse destroy, a valid part of who you are instead of accept and embrace it, good and bad. Acceptance brings an ability to attempt self mastery about it, instead if ignoring it or trying to "fake it to make it" as a nerotypical. Sounds to me like they don't want to accept reality, because they see autism as all flaw and no benefit, and you ought to want to eliminate it, because they can't fathom why you would want to be you, if you could be more like them.
That's my limited and opinionated viewpoint, wanted to express sympathy and empathy for what I heard expressed in the comment, it spoke to me. Thank you for sharing, it helped me to clarify a few things I've been thinking about.
I like saying I'm an acoustic child because I think it sounds funny and I'm a musician. I don't like saying I have aspergers though, I like that we're all grouped together in ASD.
All that said, I don't take offense either way, call me whatever you want, I love being an acoustic child 🤣
It pretty much has the same energy as calling one’s self artistic. 😆 I’m artistic autistic myself.
Yeah! Another one with acoustic special interest! I hear music everywhere (working in a factory sounded like an industrial noise concert 😁), play multiple instruments and can make music out of anything
When talking about language it is also important to consider the historical perspective. Person first language was a tremendous improvement on the deficit approach that existed previously. It was important as it acknowledged the autistic person as a person rather than a set of symptoms to be fixed. It was the start of inclusion. Today, there is a strong focus on identity and empowerment and so it is only natural that the language we use will also change to reflect this.
Yes, exactly!
As a linguistics graduate what I've learned from my studies is that language and thinking are interconnected. What I mean is, only using inclusive language is pointless if you don't challenge the way you think but also as things change and society becomes more accepting, language needs to reflect that as well.
That said I'm autistic and recently diagnosed so I really needed a video like this that summarizes the main points of language-first and identity-first while allowing me to choose for myself which one I prefer.
Thank you for the vid
I’m an Aspie and proud.
(Im a Sperg)
Lol. That's like being proud of being tall.
I like Aspie more too... Even though it is now controversial. It sounds cute, and we are cute people!
@@Johnny_T779 I agree. I think the worst thing about the word Asperges, is that it sounds like Ass Burgers, and people have to get passed sniggering. Lol. A lot of German words can be a bit much for the English ear, I guess.
I very much agree!!
Both myself and my son are on the spectrum and I personally use whatever terms I’m personally comfortable using, I suffer enough social anxiety and catastrophising issues without added extra rules to prevent a random person being offended.
In order to have a meaningful conversation or debate we have to risk being offended, and I’m happy to take that risk.
Free speech is a important to me.
As a person who prefers "person with autism" (person first language) I'm interested to see this video.
You need to be respectful of others' choices no matter what they are.
Question: have you been diagnosed with autism?
why do you prefer 'person with autism'?
I can see 2 comments but they're not visible, if you two can see them then I guess I gotta wait for them to load, sorry!
@@astrobookwormsinger i can see yours and my response from yesterday, but the other response from someone asking you why you prefer the term is not populating even though i got a notification for it. That's weird, right?
As an identity first Autistic person can I ask what you like about it. I've always felt as if person first insists on taking me apart for the comfort of others and would like to understand you perspective as a person with autism whe prefers that sort of language.
I am an adult with Asperger's, and I really see this quite differently. I prefer the "person first" version, but not because I see it as a negative. I use it to emphasise that I, as a person, cannot be described by a series of universal traits. Good, bad, but it's _ME_ first. I identify as My Self. And anything else is secondary at best. Many are too eager to reduce identity to a series of labels these days.
As far as I'm concerned person first is what you get when you carve off part of my personhood and set it aside to remind yourself I am human. I'm an Autistic disabled gay woman not a lego sculpure you can take apart.
I feel the same. Separating the person from the identity feels (to me) like mainstream society reminding themselves that I'm "still a person like them" underneath all these odd, alienating anomalies. I'm an autistic, disabled, bisexual nonbinary person, not a person with autism, disability, bisexuality and.... nonbinary-ness. Separating those things out from the 'real' person 'underneath' feels very artificial to me and like people are tying to strip parts of me away to find something more acceptable or relatable. It makes it feel like those parts of me could be changed or discarded (or even 'cured') rather than being an innate, unchanging part of who I am.
Thanks, Paul, for this refreshing and reasonable perspective (and the graphics are a nice addition).
I am almost 41 years old, when I was growing up, and when I was in my early 20s I use to get offended when ever someone asked me if I'm autistic, but after finding out that having autism made me unable to handle having a full-time job which of course made me eligible to receive social security disability income from the state, I no longer felt offended whenever someone asked me if I'm autistic. And not only that, but after eventually discovering new age spiritual videos on UA-cam that labels autistic people as indigo's or the next step in human evolution I was going through a period of time when I was acting all egotistical about having autism until I eventually found that not everyone including not everyone in the autism community agrees with the idea that autistic people are what the new age spiritual community calls indigo's or the next step in human evolution.
@@DG-wr6cl , I was only working part time, that was the only accommodation I got from my employer before loosing my job to the pandemic. I get social security disability income from the state. Since I get SSDI from the state, I am only looking for a part time job to be useful and to have extra spending money after loosing my last job to the pandemic.
I accidentally got a Union job , that was the only reason i’m not homeless .
@@DG-wr6cl agree with the getting disability idea . People who get disability or anything are a lot smarter than me
@@DG-wr6cl if you can get a trade job in a Union factory that might be ok . I say that because it is what I did . I hired in as a laborer and bid into the electrical maintenance department . It was a constant struggle but I kinda knew I’d never be able to hold a job anywhere else .
I had to retire 2019 because of knee pain . Which is a whole other story .
One job I wish I had tried is working in a supermarket , collecting shopping carts in the parking lot would have been fun . I’d probably struggle with stocking shelves , and I would struggle with checkouts/ computers , unless I was trained
@@DG-wr6cl if you have any relatives ask them for info , AND go to an employment office as often as you can and try to learn how to get info there .
Paul, your videos always demonstrate such a breadth of knowledge, experience and pertinent input from the wider autism community. In my opinion, this is your best video so far as your cover the language situation so thoroughly, yet also with appropriate conciseness and impact. I'm going to share this video with my colleagues in the hope that, we as educators, use more appropriate language with and about our students. As an aside, since my recent diagnosis, I have been embracing the identity-first language aspect wholeheartedly and with much joy! Thank you again Paul! 👍
Even if I am neurotypical (I suspect myself to be autistic, btw), I would still use the term "autistic" because of its brevity.
Cheers from the Philippines -- Ian
How about neurodivergent? Does that include things other than autism?
@@recoveringsoul755 Neurodiversity covers ADHD, autism, OCD, schizophrenia, synesthesia, Tourette's - bunch of stuff. I've heard so-called Oppositional Defiant Disorder in children talked about as a kind of misunderstood neurodiversity - though I don't remember the details. I think even sociopathy must logically also fall under the neurodiversity umbrella, since it is so strongly predicted by genetics.
@@habituscraeftig ohhh, OK. Well some of those can be comorbid with autism. Thanks for explaining
Call me "an autist" call me "autistic" call me "a person with autism". Who cares?! Such a contrived problem.
I wish how I am being called was my biggest problem…
Seems like some people just look for a reason to be upset...
I quickly wanted to say: I love this new Video-Style!! 💖
Thank you covering this dilemma so well. You did a wonderful job explaining both sides and emphasized that the best thing to do is respect each individuals preference.
Thank you for this . Now some of the bullies might just decide to Shut up and leave me alone as this is what I was trying to explain. Another ASPIE and proud to be one . And yes I AM Autistic too just to shut them all up . Thanks
I think we that are older and discovered far along and have struggled with "being attention seeking" it's like I'm proud to finally know what the heck I'm or what makes me different....
Thank you!! This was so well done! Thought provoking, gentle, compassionate, and very clearly communicated.
I didn’t know this meant so much to people within the community. I use identity first language because it uses less words, also because “autistic” is just fun to say. The term “autist” can go burn though.
Don’t generally like person first language because it sacrifices efficiency for essentially nothing.
I'm another in the "don't care" group, and appreciate this video's take so much as it does seem like a very polarized issue with a huge portion of people demanding that either person first or identify first is the only correct way and that I need to stop using whatever way I just used to describe myself.
Between the two, I think identify-first is probably the more dangerous, the more research we do the more it seems possible we may be able to cure autism some day, yet I find people who are identify first advocates often directly oppose this research, and express that they would directly oppose a cure not just for themselves, which I think they should be able to choose not to be cured if they wish, but for all people with autism, which as some one who'd love to not have the sensory issues I do, is quite frustrating and upsetting.
I understand why the group who don't like person-first, don't like it, but I don't see that mind set directly harming me in any fashion like I see the other mind set contributing to. Still, again, I use both interchangeably in the same way I refer to myself as a parent or that I have a child, so again, appreciate this video a lot.
This is FABULOUS 👏🏽- as always.
Acceptance and respect. I prefer just to use people's names. I see no need for labels but if that helps others understand ok, I think they are confusing. We are all fabulously different and I embrace that and focus on people's abilities as they highlight our strengths and gifts and make us fabulous individuals. I find the labels limiting. Everyone has things that they find difficult at times, you can refer to them as disabilities but I look at these things as areas were a plan is needed to ensure we are happy and that we can cope. Asking for help and support regardless of your label is a strong thing to do and in my opinion shows capability not disability. ❤️
I don't know if this is something new you are doing with the editing (and voice over) but I like it! Makes it really easy for me to follow :)
Great video. Excellent explanation for a sometimes confusing subject.
Hello ! I just found your channel a few days ago , I am thouroughly enjoying your content . I myself got an ADHD diagnosis about 7 years ago , and I got My ASD diagnosis last year at 44 years old . I can relate to sooo may things you talk about in your videos , it is very helpful. Thanks !
This is my new favourite video :)
such a crucial video. thank you Paul
I thought this was very well said and eye/heart opening for me -- thank you!
I prefer being identified as a person affected by Autism. I choose this because the term Autistic has basically been turned into a slur and it makes it seem like its something that defines me when that's not the case at all, and having Autism obviously implies that its something that's removable. I think my preference helps imply that we own our condition, not the other way around.
I'm perplexed by your statement. You said you prefer person-first language but then said that "having autism obviously implies that its [sic] something that's removable." Does this mean you think it's something that can or should be "fixed?"
@@3_up_moon I'm not saying that's its something that needs to be fixed or can be fixed. I'm trying to say that while it is who you are as a person, it doesn't define you. I don't know of that makes sense.
I use "autistic" for myself but I also partially think of it not purely as an identity but also as simply an adjective, like "tall" or "calm", etc and so for me it's not just about an act of rebellion, but also simply a preferred way of applying a descriptor. And the identity part is important too.
When I was getting my diagnosis in 2009, my family was getting over concerned that I would try to act as a label would define me, when I had to try to convince them that I wasn't going to "become autistic" and change how I was, or use it as an excuse. I emphasized that it was the assembly of the neurodiverse as ourselves, me included who define what the label is instead. I wasn't going to find ways to stop being the label either, but getting the diagnosis helped me to grasp how I can enable myself as a more functioning person. It may not be the same coping strategies as others may have, be it for neurotypicals or neurodiverse, but we each are to find the path that works for the individual, even if you have to carve a fresh path from long periods of experimentation and exploration to discover these new paths to functioning levels.
Wonderful video, I like the adaptation of visual cues, it helped to put a lot of focus on the topics that were in current use.
I like the new program. I like seeing you, too.
Personally, the saying someone "has" autism irks me. It really gets under my skin. But not for the reason you may suspect. I'm not offended by it. It's more about, well, language. Etymology. Specifically of the word "have". It implies posession or ownership. Like how I have a computer, and I have children. I don't "have" autism because it's too nebulous a concept. It makes as much sense as saying I have Caucasian
no it's not. autism is a developmental disorder, you say you have a disorder, you have autism and you are autistic
Yes this to autism is not a handbag I can't forget it at the bus stop and buy a new one. My brain is my brain for better or worse no changing that
Autism on a leash... Woof!
Exactly. And if I currently have it, is there a point where I no longer will?
YES YES YESSSSSSSS!!!
Why is THIS not brought up more?!
Oh God, please grant me a world that does not fixate on "precision use of description" to avoid "unpleasant connotations" and instead concentrates on what the person CAN do. "Get to the (profanity) point, I am sick of beating around the bush."
If somebody agonizes over whether to use person first or identity first about my "autism", I am of an age when "autism" has horrid connotations. Call me "aspergers" if you must. Then get on to what you REALLY want to talk about. I figure it is up to me to adapt to how other people are comfortable addressing my many apparent malfunctions and malconstructions. (It's too late to discuss this with my OEM (Original Equipment Manufacturer). She passed away a couple decades ago.) "Yeah, I was born with only one kidney, what the frubble do you want to discuss that instead of something serious?"
Unfortunately, you can probably guess by now that beating around the bush is one of the common human activities I neither understand nor "enjoy". It simply builds tension in me.
Paul, thanks for your breath of sanity here.
{o.o}
I find it interesting that children will say they "have autism, but it's only a part of me." I've had diabetes since I was six. While I use both "I have diabetes"/"I am diabetic", I always believed it was just apart of all the pieces that make me, well me. I also look at others that have their own unique trait the same way. For example my nephew has autism, but that's only a tiny part of him. I look at him and see a person who is autistic, someone who loves video-games, someone who loves disaster movies, someone who played in a band program in highschool (it was a program that paired a band student with a student from the special Ed classroom to help them perform at band events.) There's so many unique things that makes him (and me) into who he is. Autism is just a drop in the bucket.
For me, I don't care what language others use. I try to understand where they are coming from. I was wondering why people get so upset about it. It makes me nervous. But this video helps me to understand. So thank you for creating it.
I love how it shows the understanding of all the different views and then offers a path forward.
I have such pride in myself and don't feel shame, over talking openly about my identity/ braintype as often as I do, I love it!! 😃 For that reason I always say Autistic an majority of the time my second favourite is neurodivergent 🥰 .....
Am just so comfortable in myself and totally see my existence as an celebration♡♡ Am very respectful over others preferences though of themselves, as everyone including ones of different braintypes lives life differently💕..
Every single one of us has very unique life experiences differing from one to the other
As someone with autism, the idea that "you shouldn't say that" is pathetic. We're autistic, not brittle tissue paper that melts at words. Let people say what they want and let us develop thicker skin for it.
The whole mess I get myself into through being autistic is I come out with words that can be incorrect...I'm actually quite fed up of having to explain myself and apologise. It is like walking on egg shells with just about everybody now a days.
Things that melt are not brittle. They are malleable, meaning have the ability to reform under certain conditions such as with pressure or when water and pressure are applied. Therefore, to me it seems a good trait to have. To adjust as needed, and in making that choice to adjust in order to confirm to culture that differs from your own. Which is very hard to do taking bravery, flexibility and being vulnerable, as well as accepting others vulberabilities. Its respectful. Almost complete opposite to being pathetic.
@@soyunperderdor7246 I have issues like that too because of autism and sometimes I say things in a way that doesnt make sense or sounds offensive or wrong. Im also tired of having to explain myself by what I mean. Its hard having to deal with this because everyone gets offended over little things.
@@evonne315 You took semantics to a whole other level, holy crap. replace melt with break or demolish or anything else of a negative context. Being brittle is not a good thing. Stop.
couldn't agree more, people need to stop being offended by everything.
I first heard of person-first language in reference to mental health. More mentally ill people liked identity-first language also while family members usually preferred person-first language. Maybe it is the difference between experiencing a condition first hand versus experiencing a condition second hand.
I lean towards identity-first language because it usually is shorter to say. It seems more natural. But I don't care that much.
I care about intentions not words. Words convey a tiny part of face to face communication. When written down they convey even less information than when spoken over the phone. That’s why no word can hurt me. They mean so little.
With much love for everyone 🙏
I prefer identity-first language because person-first language separates Autism from the self and implies it's a 'condition' I have which could potentially be changed, rather than an immutable part of myself which I have no wish to change. In the same way I refer to myself as a bisexual person not a person with bisexuality, and a nonbinary person not a... person with nonbinary-ness..
I would also suggest (though not conclusively) that children preferring person-first language might have a lot to do with the influence of parents and professionals who, as we know, prefer that language, and who have a major influence on children in their care. It might also be prompted by (sadly still common) negative attitudes toward Autism among children and teenagers, which would make the label a difficult one to accept and could lead to that line of "yes I have Autism, but..." which very much sounds like a response to negative attitudes rather than the words of someone who is at peace with their identity.
Having said all that, I'm not actually offended if someone uses person-first language, it's still a valid personal choice, and since a portion of Autistic people do prefer it, I'm not going to lambast a neurotypical for "getting it wrong," I might just take the opportunity to explain the alternative view in a friendly way.
Personally, I prefer to say that I'm autistic, as I do not have a specific diagnosis, but have multiple diagnoses that fall within this category-- so it is more of a description of what I am like. To say that I have autism-- even if I had a specific diagnosis of ASD, this to me sounds like a disease which is something I can and should get rid of. Like I have the flu. Or I have Covid. Something to be gotten over. But these traits are just part of who I am and not going away. Many of them are actually very good for certain situations or activities and not so good in other ways. Everything has an upside and a downside. I am also dyslexic. I would not say I have dyslexia, though I am diagnosed. It's only a disorder when it comes to certain things, and it's a massive boon when it comes to others. There are common traits that dyslexic folks commonly have that are incredibly good. But there you have it-- I was going to say "people with dyslexia". On the other hand, I have been diagnosed with dyslexia. In either case, these things are me, not something separate. They are me. Period.
Oof, I like this video so much! (Every video is good, but this one makes me 🥰)
I definitely prefer identity-first, but agree with all the points made! Everything said is incredibly accurate to how I view the matter. The reactionary bit *and* how words don’t have hard definitions/cannot fully express a person’s experience but gives an idea…if I worded that correctly 😅
Validating each other over competing for things that change with TPO/person seems so basic and yet, I feel the neurotypical society has normalized power dynamics/domination (e.g. being right/ego boost/the like) over basic empathy. If reaching the top means discarding one’s humanity and being alone, it makes me wonder about the irony of being a social existence and rebelling against it…if I expressed that properly…hm.
I have no control over how another person sees me. If they make a mistake, as people do, it's an opportunity to state my preference and practise forgiveness. Your mileage may vary, but I refuse to dictate what people can and can't say, or to adopt a victim mentality.
The reason I use identify-first language goes back to high school. As much I didn’t want autism and being on the spectrum to define me, it certainly did to other people who didn’t even know I was. As far as they could tell, all throughout my school years, I was different, no matter what I did, and different was bad. It was something I couldn’t avoid. So might as well own up to it as me as a whole
I just realised that in English (not my first language) it comes naturally for me to refer to and or ask if a person is on the spectrum, but in my first language (Swedish) I'm not sure that "on the spectrum" is even used. As far as I understand it, autistic has been the predominant term for decades in Sweden. Please correct me if I'm wrong here, fellow Swedes.
Also, thanks for yet another insightful and well balanced video.
Thank you!
I think the best one is
"Aspergers person"
Thanks heaps!
Am I the only autistic person who doesn't care that much what language people use? Autism isn't my identity, it's just an aspect of me. I feel there are so much more important things we could be focusing on, like actually getting our needs accommodated in society.
I have a request for a video. Can you please discuss the need for an advocate? I have matched closely with the criteria and Aspie qualities throughout many of your videos. And I have found in my life that it makes things tremendously easier for me when I have a person by my side who will stand up for me or explain my position to people. In fact some of the best times in my life have been under these conditions when a person is taking an interest in helping me and supporting me socially. It's like I have the ability to function as a normal person when a normal person is there on my side who can interpret what I'm saying and doing. Maybe the best way to describe it is that they are my translator.
I met Mother with child. In Secondary school.
Child was looking after Mother.
In Ireland.
I understand that child was Carer for Mother.
I wish everyone give help to them!
Throwing this one up here even though it is off topic: If someone notices that they are likely to be more talkative if they are very tired, is that a sign that they are likely not autistic and that the masking is more due to trauma than cerebral wiring differences? Just something I was thinking about this morning.
When tired, my son becomes super talkative (in monologues, of course) and starts walking back and forth as if he was trying to self regulate. He refuses to admit he's shattered but as soon as his head touches the pillow he's in dreamland 😂
Autistic traits tend to become stronger when tired, as well as any masking lessening.
Autism is dynamic, the way it presents and affects a person varies all the time. This is one reason why autism 'levels' are problematic.
I think making in terms of autism has to do with trauma, but that might just be my personal experience. 🤷♂️
My sister is autistic and does this. She just starts infodumping without filter. The mask was also that filter, and that recognition that hey maybe people aren't interested anymore.
I'm also autistic and I'm the complete opposite. I go completely quiet, sometimes even completely nonverbal/selectively mute.
So no I don't think you can generalize like that.
I definitely do that. Same thing when I'm drinkin or smokin. It's something that can be realized and stopped when one is aware of it. I find that as the day goes on I actually imagine and think more and more. By the time I get to the point of just loosing myself in my own talking everyone's usually asleep. It's an outlet thing. Sometimes I find myself drawing up designs until I godda force my eyes open 😄 or pacing around as I watch/listen to youtube vids about scientific things or aliens lol. Its whatever I suppose lol.
The difference that I have noticed is that people who use person first language tend to get offended by identity first language, and the opposite is seldom true. Therefore, I tend to use person first language when referring to other people, unless I hear them use identity first language about themselves. In my country, Sweden, identity first language is rarely used anyway, so I have always used person first about my autism because that just feels a lot more normal to me.
I think it is important to not be controlling or pedantic with language, particularly as people with autism can struggle with words. Demonising language and certain words, can Demonise us.
PC language often works against working class direct speech and the direct speech people with disabilities can often much prefer also. I look forward to watching this video when it comes out.
I think it depends of the form of autism you have. With Aspergers, being pedantic will often make us understand better. Clear words and logic help a lot. Wouldn't the best be to ask the autistic person what she prefers or needs?
please eat better gertrude
I agree. Self censor if you want, and be polite by all means, but don't demand it from everyone. I'm ASD and can't stand doublespeak. Someone else may expect it. Life is hard 😅
It's interesting to hear about those kids who prefer person-first, because I'm kinda the same way. My autism is a very large, very central part of who I am, but I am not my autism. There is a lot more to me, too. It's like with my passion for comics: yes, that's a major part of who I am as a person, but there's still so much more to me than just "comic book guy #3217".
I am pretty sure I'm autistic with a co- occurring condition since I am already diagnosed with bipolar .
Apparently some studies have found that 26 % of autistic individuals also are bipolar.
Edit : interestingly three quarters of autistic people have a co- occurring condition !!!!
Like if life wasn't challenging enough !
I am bipolar also.
@@Catlily5
I just had the worst manic episode I've ever experienced , I wasn't on medication for 5 years or so and it finally caught up to me .
My mind was giving me all the anecdotal evidence it could towards evidence leaning into the direction that I was jesus!
It felt like I was fighting it the whole way through, feeling as if I hadn't succumbed but in reality I already lost , it was too convincing , although I stayed atheistic deep down it felt too accurate.
Psychosis has left my interpretation of reality in question , I'm about to get a psychologist to help cope with the after math of my minds state and hopefully get an autism diagnosis !!
@@intuitivelogic5159 Someone close to me had a similar experience. Good luck with your testing.
I say that I have Autism because most people have turned the word "autistic" into a derogatory word. They compare it with "slow and stupid". It also reminds me of that filthy word known as "retard" that has been given as a derogatory word against people with Down Syndrome. This is just me though and we are a diverse group of people. It is sad how most people haven't a clue of what Autism is and I don't tell most people. My communication skills have been good cause I found out that I was addicted to a substance and so meetings and a group of people have helped very much with that.
I am a parent of a child who has Autism. Now that he is 18 he still chooses to say he has Autism - it doesn't have him where as my daughter will say she is Autistic. I also run an ASD Mums Group and there are so many Autistic Mums who will really hold their group and have big arguments about 'how' you need to speak to people saying they speak for the whole community and it really frustrates me everyone should have a right to express or identify how they want.
i don't care either way for "autistic person" or "person with autism" but i swear if somebody ever calls me "an autistic" i will be livid
I prefer to use the word 'Asperger's' when describing my self as it more tightly describes my attributes. I find that I can say 'I have Asperger's' but can't really say I am Aspergeric! So, my options are limited.
I’ve heard the term “Aspie” 🙂
Interesting. I personally prefer to say "I have an autism diagnosis" because I don't feel like my neurology defines me. But I get people who do, and I don't judge.
Loved your approavh to the theme. I personally find it pretty stupid people get caught up in a specific way to say it, whereas I personally think whichever fits better in the phrase should be used. But I do sort of get where they're coming from.
I use whatever fits better in the phrase also.
I am not my disability. I am a person with myopia, not a myopic person. 😌 But most of the time I just don’t care, In most situation I can’t even see the difference.
😁
I try my best
thank you for this helpful video that is more than you being a talking head 😁🎉 oh gosh wait - "politically correct" can be a way to dismiss the extreme power of language as an oppressive force. i am a person of color who experiences depression, i am human and i experience depression -- i am not depressed. i strongly dislike metaphors of the market, e.g., "own your feelings". i feel strong irritation re: the metaphor of life as a journey. and apparently i am a parent who clearly falls on the autism spectrum.
AND i need language to remind MYSELF that i am a human bc i feel like an 👽most of the time. ❤️☮️🌺!!!!
To me, "autistic" feels more natural because I feel too pathologized by using "with autism". But that's just my personal preference. I think people can use what they want, but should consider being mindful of their language if someone is uncomfortable.
I use whatever way makes sense in the statement I'm saying and I prefer to say I'm autistic.
So long as nobody calls an autistic kid a "kiddo" in front of me, my blood pressure will remain in the recommended range. It's a term older men use to condescend to younger women, and a term neurotypicals use to condescend to autistic kids. Absolutely hate it.
Its my belief that the wording is irrelevant and that it's purely the intent that really matters, between me and my friend we've used "aspie af" to describe something we've done and one of my favourite comedians coined the terms " he got that burger yo" and "got a bit of that tism" to describe someone on the spectrum, I don't find those disrespectful because they aren't ment in that way 🤷🏻♂️ in fact I feel like being able to joke about anything in the right setting/context is move inclusive, the irony being correctly interpreting intent can be difficult 🤷🏻♂️🤦🤣
I feel the same way about humor. I’m very against the idea that we should never joke about things. On the other hand, I feel it’s also okay to be offended by a joke and/or not find it funny. But I think there’s a difference between saying that joke wasn’t funny vs it is never okay to joke about disability (or other sensitive topics).
@@thirtycats check out andrew schultz 👍
I’m autistic and I don’t care which term people use.The word autistic is not automatically bad.It’s not like it’s a slur or anything
I am an Aspie , but I also prefer "I have Autism"
I hope you'll receive this as humor, not as being disrespectful: definition of assbergers (noun), what Juan Valdez does with his pack mule when it will no longer carry his loads of coffee beans.
It’s not so black and white.. both ways have good in them. Not so sure if I personally would have a preference however. I think it very much depends on the context?
What does “bother” me though, is that it seems to be getting more and more normal for people to respond to situations saying they must be autistic or have OCD or ADHD, just because they like structure, order, are perfectionists or are hyperactive and have poor concentration at that moment. It really is getting to be more and more of a trend.. and while being open about yourself is something I do encourage this seems to just make it harder for those who actually are autistic, ADHD or have OCD to be taken seriously, to dare to be open about it. At least, that is my personal experience… still, it is always a matter of context. I’m just not always good at interpreting that right (in case of sarcasm or joke), so untill I find a good way to respond to this…
Side note: most of my daily environment (work collegues) do not (yet) know I’m autistic, and frankly it’s hard to open up about it with comments going on like that. Language. So important..
I say that I am autistic much like a person is deaf or blind. It's not something I have, it's something I am.
Is there any concern about how "on the spectrum" has moved a bit in the public consciousness in regard to the euphemism treadmill?
Yeah, it sounds non-descriptive. What spectrum? The colour spectrum? The acoustic spectrum?
the problem is more that in the last few years it seems to find more use in the context of insulting random internet people than to actually refer to autism
Can somebody answer I’ve asked a few times when are the chat sessions I’d like to participate having a son with Asperger’s syndrome. Thank you for your help. Great video!
Your message is confusing.
@Cat Lily I just want to know when he does the live chat so I can participate.
I've noticed a trend. People claiming to be on the spectrum when their not. I don't know why this has become a fad. But it really irritates me. I can tell that they are not like me. I do not fit in with them and vice versa. It feels like my problem is being coopted by people who seek attention. It delegitimizes my situation and struggle.
I suspect I may have Aspergers and/or ADHD. I'm not in living in my home country anymore and I don't speak the local language. Therefore, I expect it to be difficult to get a diagnosis. Is there anywhere online you or anyone else could advise I get a proper diagnosis? Thank you
Tbh I try not to bring it up. I’m 20 and still a bit bothered by this part of me, although I’m trying to get over it.
Good luck on your journey. I have a lot of self-esteem issues. And when I was young, (not autism diagnosed) I was quite ashamed of having to go to therapy, get accommodations, etc. But now I love that I’m autistic. I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s okay to struggle with it all!!! I don’t want you to beat yourself over being autistic. But I also don’t want you to beat yourself up for not being super happy jolly about it. 🙂
We call each other Aspies. We all have high IQs and out think most of those around us.
I usually say my son has Autism - rather than my son is Autistic. I don't like using the word "spectrum" because I really don't like it when people say "we are all on the spectrum" I personally find that offensive!
Hey do you know anything about hallucinations and voices been heard in the present from your past
DEAR PAUL. PLEASE HELP ME.
I think person with autism makes sense because we are people with brains. But when it’s said one has autism it can sound like one has a disease, which autism is not. This is why I feel like one can find person-first language to sound offensive. So it’s just that single buried idea that makes person-first offensive to some, and I personally have felt that way before-have been able to see it that way before.
"Person with Autism" is person-first language isn't it?
I have the flu.
I have a broken leg.
But I don't have autism.
Soooo simple.
Thanks for the video....I am not keen on either words, autistic or autism as I don't believe they make sense from a language perspective. What I mean is what is the core word? 'ism' and 'istic' are associating to? Take for example 'art'. Using the additions we get 'artistic' or 'artism'. If I said I was 'artistic' it is not the same use of language as one saying they are 'autistic' (if you discount the subject matter). Similarly the 'artism' movement is not meaning 'autism' is a movement either. So one saying they have 'autism' doesn't make sense in that one would not say 'I have artism'. So if 'art' is the core word of artistic and artism, 'aut' is the core word of autism and autistic?? At least when Asperger's Syndrome was acceptable it avoided the above faux pas!
So how can I use the person first language on other labels that people might find negative? Like, should I say, a person with transsexual identity or a person with homosexual preference? Why is it (according to some) ok to say that someone is transsexual but not ok to say that someone is autistic, what’s the difference? This is just an interesting discussion and an example, nothing against any of these groups.
Personally I don't care, I don't like controlling speech, just be honest so I know what to do with what you're telling me. I don't want to have to employ a strategy just to talk to you and I don't want you to have to use one to talk to me, just don't be rude by talking over anybody.
What about 'neuro diverse'?
A great well thought out video. Very nicely done.
I am autistic in the same way that I have blood. They are so entwined in my being that I can't separate them. If I simply "had autism" I might be able to put it down when it was too heavy to carry.
Personally, I prefer to refer to myself as "on the spectrum." Or if a person might not knkw what that means, I say that I'm "on rhe autistic spectrum".
Well in my country, if there's an equivalent for "X has autism"/"people with autism" I don't know it, so we all say we are autistic, these people are autists, etc. Problem solved !
I have no preference, I'd prefer not to be celebrated for my autism but I do wish it was normalised for my kids who are also autistic
I think in order to normalize something, we sometimes need to celebrate it a little. But…. if we celebrate something too much, it may fall into an us vs them mentality. I feel the word neurotypical is almost becoming a sort of slur.