My husband was12years younger than me. I never had a problem. He recently passed away and we were married for38 years. I think it depends on the person. He was my person and I miss him so much.
I'm so sorry for your loss...widow life is hard. No other man could ever replace mine, married 35 when he suddenly flew with the angels. He was my person, even now. He was almost ten yrs older than me and was 65 when he passed, 5 yrs ago. Cannot imagine even thinking about dating- I'm not sure why the universe sent me one of her videos, but it's interesting to see... and sad in a way too that many men are so superficial, especially old ones. Smh. Being lonely is hard. Being with the wrong person, much harder. Its singlehood for me.
I'm dating someone 12 years younger, and I had some worries about getting serious but he was persistent and doesn't care one bit. He's more mature than anyone my age that I've dealt with - and he is the youngest I've had. I do worry about aging, and staying youthful, but I'm a competitive bodybuilder and am doing my best. We work out together and laugh a lot - and when I am feeling insecure about anything, he is there with reassurance. Now I couldn't imagine my life without him.
I don’t think in this day and age 12 years is actually that bad. I think age gaps of threat these days is probably 16 years plus. If these men have kids already or you are happy to be a mother if they want children there’s no reason why the age gap of 12 should be an issue. You both should not actually look like there’s a big age gap unless one of you doesn’t take good care of your health or appearance.
You don't need to worry about looking younger, just aging gracefully. Most of us love the look of an older woman. The more your age you look the hotter it is really.
I am a 63 year old single retired male. This is not a comment on this video, but your channel in general. Somehow the algorithm sent me one of your videos and I was hooked immediately. Your personality, poise, confidence, articulation and video style ( being slightly back farther from the camera and a lower left aspect) makes you less a talking head (as many channels are) and more a friend over for coffee. Your conversation style feels so natural and honest I want to know what and why you think what you do. I just hit subscribe! Good luck with your channel and I look forward to more from you neighbor!
My neighbor is 82 and her husband is 68. They both look 50 and and no one would know if they didn’t tell everybody 😂. They are energetic and fun to be around! They have been happily married for over 35 years! ❤
Wtaf with that guy working on your car talking to you that way! I hope you told him off, left a review about his behavior and never gave him another dime!
20 years older, him. 24 years of wedded bliss. Not without challenges but we have weathered many storm and are still in love. If you rely on society to carve your path and rules you will fail. We don’t give a darn what anyone thinks. We are happy and that’s all that matters. Don’t give up
@@YOLONOW5280 introducing you to appropriate suitable men who were attractive and appealing. Nobody puts out the effort and bothers, then when you make a life with someone much younger, they criticize.
My boyfriend of2 yrs is 18 yrs younger, i’m 54. We live together, have a lot of fun, laughs, great intimacy…I think you end up with the soul you were meant to meet and the rest is just superficial stuff… follow your heart!
I really think if there’s a true soul connection then age doesn’t matter. I’ve been seeing someone for a month now who is 18 years younger than me. I felt an immediate soul connection with him. And he makes me feel more valued than any man has in the past decade. Also with an older man you do still have to try to retain your youthfulness. The last man I dated my age ended up leaving me for a woman 20 years younger than me. He also never told me I was beautiful but my younger man tells me I’m stunning all the time. I think we place too much emphasis on age.
Omg. Just the other day you were at 7k subscribers. Wow, just a few days and you’re at 10k?? Congratulations!!! Love watching your videos. I’m a almost 60 year old female. You’re very open and honest. Love your views on it all.
Wow! This video was great! I TOTALLY get where you're coming from. When I was younger and living in LA, most of my relationships were with older men. Then I moved to Japan and almost all of my relationships were with younger men. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I think what makes your channel so great is that we can all feel like we're having a good chat with a friend! Cheers!
I am with an older man, 14 years, and he is now ill. Although there is much love, I feel 90 % nurse for 24/7. I never have a day off. I will not advice this route to anyone, that said.... I experience a very true amazing love through out the entire relationship of 30 years and I never missed anything. So there is a balance ❤❤❤
@dooremieke.janssens1240 Thank you, dear, it put it all in perspective. And it is true. My husband had a stroke, with severe brain damage...and I main black holes instead of grey brain cells. And that is what I miss the most, his intelligence, his power, his communication, to be equally. Thank you for your support, I appreciate it 🙏😘
Very good that there is a balance❤. Hope you can relax, it's important for your health. I try to spend times without my boyfriend who is 5 years older and has been severely ill for more than a year.
You bring up a lot of good points about dating someone a lot younger if you are a woman. Hampering his ability to have children and considering how you would feel if he were your son certainly speaks to the integrity and wisdom you gave the situation. I would feel the same way, plus I think it would be very disempowering to always be trying to be young to fit in. Thanks for sharing.
I have dated women much older than me for many years. I’m 70 and dated several women in their mid eighties and one in their nineties. They really appreciate what I have done for them. And I love their mature beauty.
My wife was 10 years older than me, I was paralysed when we met, we were together for 34 years, she sadly died 4 years ago, she was a fabulous gorgeous wife. She would have been 78 this Christmas.
Much younger men are fun and I had a great deal of fun for 2 years! I never thought of it as a sustainable relationship and we parted with after some time no bad feelings. "society" doesn't interest me maybe because I come from a large city. He was sweet and funny and so cute When I was with him I felt and acted like a teenager. It was just perfect at that time. But I always knew it wasn't a relationship . I was 60 , he was 36. Time well spent from my point of view.
It is possible that person giving this unsolicited advice was just trying to be helpful since this video explains that the pitfalls of such a relationship are real. Personally, I’m not surprised the two relationships did not work out. The one guy did not have parents who were in his life. What kind of young guy dates a much older woman? Well the kind of guy that probably has issues and that you should most likely avoid.
@@econhelp583 This is very judgmental, don't you think so? An alternative explanation is that we are different and not everybody thinks or does like you, how about that?
I really appreciate this video. I can totally see you dating men younger than yourself given your appearance and flexible mindset. I'm so sorry it didn't work out. I was curious how long each relationship lasted. I think you were very thoughtful ending it for the reason that you did. You really put a lot of care into the relationship. I feel like you're far ahead of most men your own age and it would make sense why you had two relationships with younger men. In my opinion, the mechanic at the garage made egregious comments that had nothing to do with you. It was some type of projection of his own personal situation that he was attempting to place onto you. I truly wish you all the best.
My husband is 5 years younger than me. We've been together for 30 years. His mom, at first said, I was using him for sex. LMAO!!!! I was 27, fit and took great care of myself, still do. He still lived at home with mom and dad while completing college after 4 years in the military. We were friends first because he was fun, kind, driven in his future goals, smart and respectful. Qualities that I desired in a life partner. Couldn't help but fall in love with him.
My ex and father of my kids was 6 and physically I look younger than him but his lack of maturity made me quit after 12 years together. We are in our 50s now and he looks like 15 years older than his menopausal ex😂
I'm 51 and I don't like dating younger men right now because the men always have young kids and ex-wife or baby mama drama. I usually date 10 years older.
I met four men in their 50s online. They were all divorced with high school and college kids, and ex-wives who were entitled to lifetime spousal support because they had been stay-at-home wives. No thank you.
@@genxx2724 - That's unfortunate. I did meet one man like that too. He drove with Uber in addition to having a full-time job to pay the lifetime alimony.
"They either want a nurse or a purse", as the saying goes. The last relationship I was in, he was 14 years younger. He ended up needing two hip replacements and he was in his early fifties! I took great care of him (nurse) and of course was purchasing a lot of food to include in that care (purse). We had discussions on how he might eventually have to care for me someday. He swore up and down he could and would. I got a puppy, and he didn't lift a finger to help out! Therefore, it's not what someone says, it's what they do that speaks volumes!!! Many lessons learned. Thank God I got a puppy, she showed me who he really was before it was too late.
He just wasn't interested in playing pet parent. If he never said he's got all this love to give and needs a fur friend for an outlet, don't be surprised if he's not interested in scrubbing carpets trying to toilet train it or walk it with worn out hips.
I love dogs. I have Border Collies. One cornerstone of my current relationship is that he loves dogs & dogs love him! Yes. Take the dog over the man (if he can't man up with a dog he can't man up with you~!)
My gal is 8 years older than me. I met her when she was 60 and she’s now she’s 80. She is still a size 2 and I saw a pic of her when she was about 45 and she literally looked like a movie star. She’s still beautiful to me. I’m lucky she doesn’t know how gorgeous she is or I’d never have had the chance.
My great grandmother was 14-15 years older than her 2nd husband. They stayed together through two world wars and the great depression. It's a situation that has occurred throughout history and all cultures. The relationship is no one's business but the two involved. We are too concerned in this day and age about what others think. Variety is the spice of life. Why wear masks to impress others? Each person's life is their own. As far as children, men can father any time and may have other relationships after an older mate passes away. We try to control so much...if love finds you, just be happy.
Brilliantly said! My uncle is 12 yrs older than my aunt. My dad was 10 yrs older than my mum. My godmother was around 8 or 9 yrs older than my godfather. Being surrounded by couples with an age gap has normalised age gap relationships for me somewhat. I'm actually interested in someone 7 years younger than me. Honestly, it does worry me a bit BUT I just need to remind myself of age gap relationships that I know of which have worked.
Finally, a balanced comment, not so weighted by all the prejudices that we hear around. I find these generalisations so boring and uselss... We heard them all before, give us some different stories! Negativity we all know it too welll. We all know good stories exist, there is no one rule for everybody. Thank you for this!
Im 23 years older than my fiance. We have been together 7 1/2 years and its amazing. We are best friends and feel just as passionate as we did in the beginning. Weve had to navigate around his family issues but not mine. I worry about the agjng, but who’s to say if I was with somebody closer to my own age, that they would stay faithful as I age out? Bottom line is, nobody else that I’ve ever been with has expressed and demonstrated as much love as he does towards me. There are no guarantees in relationships, no matter what the age between the two partners.
@hideoussails1783 most men want children and to start families. The biological drive to procreate and work to support families is what spurs most men on. While some men (a minority) will get with older women they at some stage fade out and pursue younger women. The very small subset of men you speak of who don't want children would be statistically insignificant to the global populace of men who do want children. Also they don't have to get with older women to not want to have children.
I think your age gap probably just makes it to being doable as a long term good outcome. I have the view that 16 years plus is where the long term outcome starts to decline in lasting because of age differences. I mean relationships fall for many reasons that have nothing to do with age, so that also has to be taken into account too.
I dated a man 19 years younger than me for almost 5 years. I'm childfree, and he doesn’t want kids either. I look about 10 years younger than my age, and I'm very energetic and sporty. Everything was great between us - we shared hobbies and passions, and we loved spending time together. He used to visit almost every weekend, and sometimes even during the week. I never really noticed people staring at us. I look younger and even though he also looks much younger for his age, so we never got any bad looks or comments. I met his family, but I preferred to keep things intimate between us. I didn’t attend holidays like Christmas with his family and was comfortable with our long-distance arrangement. However, I eventually found out that he kept talking to other women online. Although he showed me a lot of affection, bought gifts and flowers, supported me, and was there when I needed him, he couldn't stop connecting with new women. While the conversations weren’t really flirtatious, I just couldn’t accept it. It’s been two months since I ended things, and it’s been really hard. He tried to reach out but never actually apologized. I realize now that he’s 28 and still discovering himself, so I decided to just let him go.
Reading the first half of your comment… I could have predicted the last paragraph. Of course he was speaking to other women , we women can be so naive.
At some stage, that young man would want to have children and a family. That was probably something you could never give him. As he got older, that imperative for a man to want children would increase. It's probably natural that he wanted to look at other options with other women.
We do not AGE INSIDE. My last partner was 9 years older and it was never an issue. When she died from a brain tumour I was beside myself with grief. A deep love grew over the years. I know I will never replace her, but I never expected to loose her. THAT is the downside of an older person. We had a great life, good sex, High compatibility. Age is irrelevant but grief is unwelcome and overwhelming.
Im 65, my husband is 48. Been married 24 years. I keep telling him to shoo, but he insists on sticking around. 😂 Seriously, I have no idea why it works, it just does and we're still nuts about each other. ❤
I think the biggest drawback about being with someone much younger is that they are usually not monogamous. ( They don’t have to be in today’s hookup generation.) A few years ago, I was “love bombed” by a guy 20 years younger. He told me up front he wanted me to be his mistress and travel with him. He also said he liked a variety of women and was not monogamous. I declined his invitation; although, I was very tempted. My husband had died several years earlier, and this guy dragged me out of a state of despair and grief I thought would never end. I never told him this and hope he is doing well and is happy.
The fact he was love bombing you says that the relationship was probably not very healthy. As you mention, the attention did help you get out of your despair. Attention can be flattering though I hope people look past the words and see how their values align.
At least he was honest about not being monogamous and gave you the benefit of making your decision based on the truth. Being love-bombed can be a delightful thing at first. The same thing happened to me and it made me realize I was still a desirable woman at 73. And he was honest with me, too, and I also declined to take the relationship further. But he reawakened something in me that I was able to keep alive after moving on and so I remain grateful for that relationship,
Good insight! I found that the men who were 10 years younger than me and reached out to date me was because they were immature financially and in other ways. They needed a mom type and leader so it was no deal for me.
Yes, after years of marraige to my husband I realized he needs a Mom, not a partner. I want a partner. He wanted a mother-someone to do the cooking, cleaning, the book keeping & all the thankless tasks like use up my retirement fund and work full time so he can spend money he doesn't have. I would agree with the statements above. He told me, "I thought you were rich when I married you!" I thought he was sober, employed & a gentleman; instead I got an alcoholic that is far from romantic or appreciative and does not communicate at all.
They would be exactly the same with a younger woman too, so I don’t think it’s age is the issue. Some men and some women are just dependent personalities and look for responsible adult partners to balance themselves out.
I was just recently, less than 2 months ago, in a relationship for 5 years with a man who was 18 years younger than me. People actually kept telling me I looked younger than him and no one ever said a word about us dating. I still love him a lot but my self esteem was suffering because I was always trying to keep the younger side of me going with dress, hair, makeup etc. I am 79 and he is 61. I am content with my life and live a fun adventurous one and I know every day counts. I am not attracted to men my age so I will be single until I go to the other side I think.
I hope not! What if a man could love you the way you are. I know it's hard but if we can love ourselves (also hard) and accept the way we look I know from experience the man in your life will love you. Some men really don't care as much as we think they do
Yeah i can't tell where that guy was coming from, but if i had to guess i'd say he was somewhat jealous. He has issues if he felt the need to tell her that totally rude, unsolicited and unuseful opinion. I'd only excuse it if he had some previous bad experience with a situation like that whether it involved him or he got to observe as third person, but still, he should've reserved his opinion to himself.
I totally agree with your comments. I'm a gay man, 60, and have dated younger guys for short periods of time. I feel that up to 10 years younger works, more than doesn't. Two points you made that I have always felt. I missed the connection (you talk about The Captain and Tennille, Mary Tyler Moore, the Carpenters) and they have no idea about you're talking about. Also, dating much younger guys makes me feel OLDER, not younger (as you said). These were the two biggest issues. Society stuff didn't bother me, as it's very common in gay relationships to have a large age difference.
I dated a younger man once. He was 9 yrs. Younger. He treated me so well! He wined & dined me alot! We Went to Gatlinburg and he rented us a Condo. We had the best time together! I truly cared about him! I ended the relationship because I was 44yrs. old at that time and wasn't planning on anymore kids. I felt like her needed a chance to have kids of his own. I hurt him when I broke it off and it was really hard to stay away! Found out this yr. he died 3yrs. ago. 😢 I will always have fond memories of him. ❤
Did he marry and have children after you broke up? Just curious... I'm 45 years old and in a relationship with a 39 years old. I never had children and don't want to have any. I always give him space and already told him that I understand if he wants to look for a younger woman to have children...
@@kitty1256x They could have agreed to a family relationship. She could have been an aunt to his children, if he married and had children. You never know what life will bring. Look what happened. They may as well have stayed together.
It’s also wrong for older women to tell younger men what they should want. Maybe he would want kids, or maybe he wouldn’t. You can’t insist that he should go find someone to have kids with if he was truly happier being with you without kids and wanting that. What you are doing is pushing someone away and that’s not fair either. He’s an adult and gets to decide what he wants. If you felt that you were too old for him then why even get involved in the first place?
I know what you mean. i was always younger looking too. one day my son and I were eating at a restaurant and a woman passed by us and said , look at the cougar! in a derogatory way and I thought I'm not doing anything but having lunch with my son lol. another time my other son had his arm around me while we were walking through the mall and OH MY! the looks we got. I don't know why it's looked at any different than men dating a much younger woman, but of course the old double standard in society is still there.
That woman Sounds like a creep. My divorced colleague moved to a new house, and was out front washing the car and got into a water fight with his teenage daughter. The neighbors were giving him dirty looks. They thought she was his girlfriend.
@@rosamoreno4794 it's not gross, it's not society - it's just biology. You could argue it's different today but what's 30-40 years in thousands of years of human evolution?
@@doncorleone3901 not true! A couple of hundred years ago in Europe it was common to that a younger man married an older widow, took care of her business and when she passed he married a younger woman to have children with and so on. It was a way to to preserve property and make sure older women were taken care of
I am a 57 year old black female who was recently in a 15 year relationship with a white male who was one year older. It seems the people who had problems with our relationship were middle age and senior white women. I loved it. As a black woman we see on a daily basis white women with black men; so my attitude was to smile and in my mind, I would say “deal with it”.
Another problem dating 15-20 years younger is the horn dog factor and the mommy issues, ie, they are looking for one. Flakiness is another factor. The problem dating my own age is that the men look terrible. Ironically it is the men who lie about their age stating to be 59 when it’s is obvious they are in their late 70s.
My sugar mama fooled me for a while by getting waxed down below and regularly retouching roots up above. I thought she was just wild and daring saying don't worry about contraception and when there were no monthlies thought we were having a baby.
Great sharing!! *Stella Got Her Groove Back* vibes. Ya know, I wouldn't date a man--even younger than 5 years than me. Their maturity is so whack. I usually date my exact age or older. And yes..I think it could be fun to date a hot, younger man--in the short term. But, as you said, it is a block to the guy finding a younger person to build a whole life with, in my opinion. Love your dating topic vids!! Keep 'em coming!
As a 70 year old man who has been single for almost 20 years I really have no answer for you except to tell you how I handle those situations. I lived with a woman who was 3 years older than myself I have dated a woman who was 7 years older and I have also dated a woman who was 9 years younger than me. Personally I don’t care what society or others think or say about my relationships or the age difference. I will say though and you touched on it too if the age difference is significant it’s challenging to relate to each other. I live in the St. Louis area so those situations might be quite different for you but at any rate I sincerely wish you and everyone of your subscribers nothing but the best.
My husband is 6 years older than me. We grew up 500 miles apart. Yet we can reminisce about the same tv shows, music, and popular culture of our youth. The shared memories we have are very important to me.
My last relationship was with someone 14 years younger and I wasn't comfortable for the reasons you discussed. I haven't dated since because he was a toxic nightmare but if I ever do, they won't be more than a few years younger!
New and subscribing. Well, women do date younger but their relationships don't last long, I have seen across America. However a few older women with younger men do last but only a FEW. I have been reading about this topic for decades now. Being physically fit is very important...............................stay safe out there
Where to begin. First of all, if what others think about your actions causes you to not pursue something you might enjoy, you may miss out on a lot. Your choice. Secondly, I used to run a non-profit foster agency. Our first foster family was a couple who married when he was 18 and she was 40. They did have children together, but my point is they remained a solid couple until his death at age 68. She lived to be 93. Admittedly they were likely the exception, not the rule. But had they not taken the chance they would not have discovered how happy they could be. Third, many same aged couples choose to not have children. Fourth, "barren" couples often adopt or become foster parents. My advice would be take the leap if you find someone (adult, of course) no matter what age if you "tickle each other's fancy". I'm 75 y/o (this Christmas) and I lost my wife of 35 years in April. I am devasted and I believe you should take your chance at love when you have the opportunity. You don't know how much time you have. In the words of Langston Hughes, “Folks, I'm telling you, birthing is hard and dying is mean-so get yourself a little loving in between.”
As a single older woman I have experienced a lot of the same. Dated much younger and dated men I met online. Both experiences taught me a lot. I can’t say I would ever do either again 😢. I love your channel and great topics ❤
The sequence is => compatibility - time together - romance and psychological attraction - appreciation and admiration - physical attraction (no matter how the other person actually looks) - sharing sex as an spiritual complement. That's the right order. A different order would probably fail. The first thing is having a very high match in similar priorities (regarding not only the top of the ranking but also the bottom of the ranking), things both like, things both dislike,... and from there see if you enjoy time together, and time will tell. Kindest regards!
Exactly. And there is such a stigma, even now. This horrible perception that if you don't have children that means you're selfish and not as much of a woman, not complete, something is wrong with you. Even other women will look down on you and treat you differently. Also if a woman doesn't have children, it doesn't mean she's a person who dislikes children, she usually loves children, there are so many reasons why she may not have children. Think of a comment that a recent politician made about being a childless cat lady, that was awful and so ignorant. It's funny how if a woman has dogs it's another story. I could go on but not in a text on UA-cam. But all I know is so many women with children shouldn't have children. And just because you can give birth, doesn't mean you're a mother.
They don't when they are in their 20's, but most do as they mature. Even into my 40s I could be mistaken for much younger, but already had children and a life of grown-up responsibilities. Younger men were commonly attracted to me. I can tell you that without exception I found those men extremely immature & lacking in life experience. There was virtually no chance of developing a real relationship of equals. We weren't equals in any way. If short-lived fun & games is what you're looking for, maybe. And in most cases, no, their parents aren't very welcoming. Especially when you already have children. Most men really aren't financially established until at least their mid-thirties, so you are likely to be picking up the cost of the fun you have. It can work out in some cases, at least for awhile, if you are a wealthy celebrity . . . Seems to be with Cher & her BF, who is nearly 30 years younger. But, hey, we're talking about Cher!😮
Just came across your channel yesterday and I must say, I'm loving your videos. You are so warm, and matter of fact on your observations, and as a soon to be single 61 year old female, I really appreciate the subjects you are speaking on. I've also been enjoying the comments. Thank you for putting yourself out there to bring these things to light.
I found my soulmate when I was in my early 20s and she was married to someone else. We have been together through thick and thin for 44 years. Being in a shallow relationship, or ending one for superficial reasons is quite alien to me.
I’m so sorry for the abuse you’ve suffered from awful men. I think you are blessed with beauty, youthfulness, and grace. Thank you for your wonderful videos! I wish you all the best 🙏❤️
I dated a man 20 years younger for almost 2 years and I definitely would not do that again ..... but i'm DEFINITELY glad I did it once. It opened a whole new universe for BOTH of us.
When you say a whole new world, I would like to hear more because I just ended a relationship with a man 18 years younger and I'm sad about it. I miss lots of parts of the relationship but not others.
My daughter in law (same age as my son) called me in tears this week because they found out they likely can’t have kids. I love and support them just as much without the prospect of grandchildren. My oldest daughter, doesn’t date and is super happy single, no grandchildren there either. I don’t love or support my kids any less for that. Children are never guaranteed and that you would end a relationship of your own over the loss of a theoretical problem for your son, that says more about you and your friends than anything else. It seems to me that the issue is really that you couldn’t take the external societal pressure, as well as the mass amount of it you have internalized over the years.
Yeah, I’m 65. I had been married. She divorced me. I’m single now. I went through a lot of drama with the mama. I now own a truck. I just bought some property and I bought a small John Deere tractor to work that property. I’m on a pension and debt free and can travel the world. Anytime I want is all with the hand of God that led me to this point. I have all the freedom in the world each and every day and night, I realize that relationships can be very difficult. I see it over and over again and I don’t have to go through any narcissist abuse anymore.
The wisest thing I heard was from Martha Stewart- If you want to be happy for one year get married; if you want to be happy for ten years get a dog; if you want to be happy for life be a gardener. So true.
I'd say that the most successful relationships are those where the two people are on the same page of life. If you are with someone much younger, your life experiences are so different. You have more history in your past and you know more history about how the world functions. Not to say it can't work, but it works better the more you have in common.
That’s super weird about the guy working on your car saying that! As far as any of my sons, I’d be fine with them dating much older, as long as she made him happy. I’m 12 years older than my husband of 17 years. He tries to look older, growing a very long gray beard lol I’m not crazy about the age difference.
Thanks for sharing your experience. I've dated many much younger men and had longer term relationships with a couple of men. I hear your frustration about negative opinions from the public and your friends. Me, I acknowledge that a part of my mind (the inner child) seems concerned with what others think but the truth is, what is most important to me, is that I'm true to myself and as authentic as I can be. If I feel a love connection with someone and its mutual, and the relationship is healthy and life affirming, age is irrelevant. I actually don't see the relevance of comparing yourself with your son's potential situation. It seems like an entirely different situation. I would imagine that someone 15 or 23 years younger than you is, like you, a mature person, mature enough to know whether they wanted someone they could have kids with or not. I would not appreciate a so called friend projecting their agenda on me and asking a question that seems steeped in their judgement of your very personal choice. Love is love. If two people choose to be together its entirely their business. And when it comes to our children...once they are adults its their path to walk...I'm currently working on myself and allowing (within my mind) my 24 year old son to date who he wants of course. It's his business and not mine to interfere. I just want him to be happy. Like me, he's going to make mistakes and probably learn some hard lessons. That's life. You are very youthful looking and a beautiful woman. I myself am in my late 50's and finally learning to be me. Living solo and choosing to be quiet with a lot of self care. I trust that if I'm meant to be sharing time with someone that the opportunity will show up in Divine Timing. I'm learning to have a loving relationship with me. Meditation. nature, crafting and community service bring joy to my life. After dating people of varying ages I truly feel now its about the person and the connection you have together. Relationships seem to basically be for helping each other heal. This can seem harmonious or challenging. Self love and self respect is paramount. When this is stable it seems the right people are in my field and the ones that are not kind don't get to me so much. They can have their opinions. Opinions...everyone seems to have one! Enjoy your life....solo or in company (good, fun company hopefully). Hang in there Sistar. You are amazing! I've only seen two of your videos. I look forward to watching more.
I dated a man 22 yrs younger than me. Had a great connection, but I agree with you on the generational issues. I guess Cher and Madonna are happy with it 😂, but a big no from me.
My fianceé is 39 i am 28 and we both feel like there isn't an actual gap. We relate very much to eachother and have everything in common, even details about our lives, our childhoods, values, mentality, politics, life goals, relationship goals. We're like brother and sister almost. I've always had an easier time connecting with older women. I think the trouble people have in age gap relationships like ours is the same as any other relationship. People don't know how to date, how to vet, how to choose someone, they just go for feelings and after the first 6 months fade you have no chemical cocktail left to buffer the fact that you have nothing in common.
Appreciate your honest and vulnerable opinion about how dating a younger person makes you feel more insecure about your own age or aging process. Insecurities that you can not control nor rectify through intellectual amélioration or awareness, as some insecurities can't simply be conquered because we are just mere mortals at the end of the day. And that's ok to avoid them instead of highlighting them by seeking them
I'm 46 and happy with my husband of 4 years who is 27. We're best friends. The only person who was against our relationship was his mom (6 years older then me). She is wise enough to make it seem like she's fine with our marriage now:) All the people arround me supported my choice: friends, family, colleagues. You are right, I do feel more aware of my age now when i'm with him. But he's the one to always reassure me i'm beautiful. And i know for him - i am. As for him not having kids, he will be able to easily find a younger woman even after 10-15 years. Men are still "good to go" in their 40s, you know:) Right now it's not a problem for him so why should it be for me? Nobody knows how long will any of us live or what tomorrow will bring. And if I can be happy TODAY, why shouldn't I?
I think beyond an age difference beyond several years, there can easily be a clash. You mention this. There is something about the references you have with a peer that is comforting.
It's interesting to hear how it is with the over fifty women, me being sixty now. I have ended relationships with amazing women, over children in the past. They needed a family and I didn't want them to miss out. It is a surprise to me that there are a lot of younger attractive women wanting to date older men. I am not rich. You look great, by the way. I like your video's and appreciate your honesty. :)
My gal who was 12 years older than I was wonderful partner. Am 67 now and I lost her at 50. Was just sad that her health took her so early. I've haven't been able to date younger women. Most definitely hard to get along with 40 year old or younger. Found myself more interested in the older gals in my retirement community. But there is a challenge for me with women that are in the 70 plus age group. I enjoyed the company and companion opportunity. But found the fact that an secure financial and still look young for my age . Am fit and healthy energy. So older women don't seem secure with me as a relationship. I hear it in conversations and I know it's a lot to expect more . I been finding older women aren't interested in sexual desires. Not all but the woman who I been friends with are negative on sex. So am I just meeting the wrong folks.
I have dated a few women older than I am and it was mostly great. But now, as we all grow older, I find the older women to be bitter due to getting burned in past relationships. Younger women are more open minded and happier. This isn't about looks, it's about attitude, and I know older women can't forget their past. But I also know I shouldn't have to pay for men that wronged them.
Your seating arrangement looks very cozy the way you have a wall to your right and the window to your left with you right in the middle with scenic paintings behind you, very homey!!!
My husband is 24 and I'm 41. We've been together for 6 years. It takes being confident and secure in yourself to be with someone a lot younger. I'm greying and have stopped coloring and let my natural come through. We've had a few comments and looks over the years but we know what we have and let any negativity slide like water off a ducks back.
I’ve only dated 3-7 years younger, and most people thought I was younger than the guys. I also don’t think I could do more than 10 years younger because of the generational issues you mention.
You need to be yourself.....If you cannot be yourself around someone that is much younger than you, it is NOT WORTH pursuing the relationship. My advice to everyone: BE YOURSELF
I am posting here a part of the letter my great-grandmother received from her sister, dated June 13, 1921 - Dublin: "My Dear Hilda, "Love found me very late, after years of misery in my life I thought I already paid my dues, but I was wrong: He is 37 years old! Onun annesi olabilirdim, how to deal with 21 years of age difference? I am not expecting you to understand my love or my pain, I feel like dying. So, this was the true love and he is the man I wanted and waited for all my life... I could not do it, so I made an arrangement to live in a monastery for the rest of my life. You can't believe how useful a woman at my age can be helping others. Please do not look for me." Nothing has changed in a century!
As a 42-year-old man who likes older women, this discourages me a little. I'm open to dating women my own age, but I would also like to date women older than me, but most older women don't want to date a man significantly younger than them.
You should think a few things before getting involved with a much older person. In a large age gap, are you compatible emotionally and physically with the other person? Do they have the money to retire together and to enjoy their life together, or is the older one going to wait until 88 years old for the other to reach 65 and start their retirement life of activities and travel? Are you willing to become the caregiver to the much older partner later in life? Are you OK if your much older partner passes away and you are left alone to care for yourself?
Also consider the fact that nobody has a crystal ball, and unpredictable things happen in life. The younger person could very well die first due to an accident or disease.
My second husband was 10 years younger. When I was 36 and he was 26 it wasn't any big deal at all. 12 years later it still wasn't a big deal but I got really sick of his inexperience bad spending habits etc don't think age had anything to do with it
I haven't dated more than 5 or 6 years younger than I am, and I don't think I'd ever cross the 10 years younger line, but I do like to see women out there doing it if only to show both men and women that its not only something a man can do
I'm 50 and have always dated women somewhat older than me. There was 19 years between my mom and step dad and they had the best relationship I have ever seen. Only issue was the last 2 years before my step dad passed his care and the age difference very hard on my mother, Btw. You are a beautiful and amazing woman!
The problem with dating younger, especially for those who have a self-image of looking young, is that next to a truly young person the older looking skin etc. is more apparent. Aside from the heads up on the obligatory underage guessing, it always annoys me when seniors announce how young they think they look. For me, it goes from meeting an attractive well-seasoned person to an annoying one. I would have assumed you were in your sixties, and I suspect you know you looked younger when you were whatever age you suppose you look to be. Another problem, which you have mentioned or talked around, is that as soon as there is a health issue, it's a problem. That is because the younger person is looking for someone to take care of them, not the other way around. Obviously, your video just showed up on my feed despite my never searching for anything of the like lol. So, the algorithms are with you, my friend. Congratulations and much success. I do have a thought on dating your own age. What would happen if, instead of bristling with offense at a less than kind remark on your appearance, you would flip the conversation with how attractive you find your date and verbally focusing on his qualities?
@@MitelefonoRoman Perhaps. And, I could say the same about you. Or, perhaps you could explain to me how searching for True Crime, Cooking Shows, Indiana Fever Highlights, Hurricane Helene Relief Efforts, Couponing, Tofu, Ryobi lawn mower repair, Choir Choir Choir, and Coffee Shop Music would kick up this video, that would be amazing. I am happy for her success, but obviously, her video is really being pushed. If we are going to get off the subject matter and start analyzing what lies beneath, that is what I would like to know the answer to as I find it curious.
Tried it once, hated it! I'll stick to men my own age with whom I have more in common and shared life experiences. Thanks for sharing your experience as well Holly. Too bad people have to be so judgmental; it just makes it harder on the couple and it's unfair, really.
Girl, sounds like you over thought dating younger men. They don't care about if you're dressing trendy or the things that you mentioned. I mean, your concerns are legitimate but at the end of the day men know what they want and they act on that.
I can't believe you have gotten such comments! You are very youthful -look fantastic. And people rarely make such criticisms with all the older men who are with much younger women. But, I agree that there is a generation gap/experience gap between people over 10 years younger. But, at the same time, I dated some guys who were 10 years younger and those men acted older than me.
I don't know about people rarely making comments when it's an older man and younger woman. My husband is 18 and a half years older than me. We've been married 25 years and the looks and comments have never stopped. If anything they've gotten worse because thankfully I have aged well. When his boss met me the first time he just declared, "This is WRONG." lol
After their divorce, my mother married a man 16 year younger than her and my father married a woman 14 years younger. They both have been married to their new partners around 30 years and both seem to have made it work.
Age gap relationship. He’s younger. It can work if you stop worrying and caring about others judging you. Yes people can be very rude and nosey. But if you let others bully you into believing you’re not worthy to be with someone younger, your relationship and self esteem will suffer. I’m a very private person and don’t meddle in how others live so I find it particularly irritating when people meddle in my life. They look but they seldom comment. If they do, I don’t acknowledge them as I do not owe anyone any explanations. If you love someone, and they love you back and treat you well, then be happy and be with them. Don’t let anyone tell you who you can and cannot love. If they don’t like it, that is their problem. It’s your life and your business. Live it YOUR way.
I was asked out by a much younger man, but he dropped the ball & it never happened. A slightly younger man asked me out around the same time, and he also dropped the ball. That's ok. I was a little curious, but I was happy to be in my singlehood when my current boyfriend asked me out. He's 1 year younger, lol.
Oh this was a great one! I was reluctant to get into a relationship with a man 12 years my junior. I was 40. He persuaded me and we finally got married and had a daughter. He had other children and so did I, this daughter was like a golden child to us. We were married for 20 years, then when I was 60 (on disability) he just walks out. He was controlling of everything and I went along with it to keep the peace and make him happy. Now I’m starting over trying to figure out who I am now….. never do that again, follow your gut
My wife of 32 years passed away two years ago and re-entering the dating world has been amusing - recognizing that I am the root cause of most of the humor. Once you have made 60 trips around the sun, you are pretty set in your ways and in many ways this simplifies determining if you have a good fit with someone. Obviously, no one is going to change at this point in life. I have dated women 12 year older than me and 12 years younger than me. I really do not think that span of years is that big of a deal - but the life experiences certainly are. Relax , if it is meant to be, it will happen. In the mean time, I pray you are happy. Best of Luck, Becoming Me
You made a good point in that there is something about being in the same generation, with the same experiences, for example, I'm a millennial, and having another person to discuss certain universal topics that would have affected us the same at different ages of development is comforting and feels "safe" like a cornerstone to understanding each other, I think, just a basic already pre-built in feel for their emotional and mental landscape, down to experiencing the same types of music of different eras, etc.. I can't feel comfortable with anyone when there is an age gap of more than 2 or 3 years honestly, in either direction, so that's a tiny window. I am open to dating older men, if the right person was there, because I appreciate a mature mindset, until I start to think about how his prom was when I was three years old or something, however, and then the age difference just feels icky, but I agree with this video that younger has also felt equally cringe. It's an imbalance, somehow, somewhere. Like with an older person, you expect a certain level of treatment, just because you are with someone older, and with a younger person, you automatically have a tiny assumption to feel superior or like you are the more dominant one, until suddenly - you're not.
My husband was12years younger than me. I never had a problem. He recently passed away and we were married for38 years. I think it depends on the person. He was my person and I miss him so much.
My husband is 12 years younger too. He’s the sweetest and best man, we’ve been together for 17 years.
So sorry for your loss. I lost mine too. He was only 59 😢
That's so sweet of you! How romantic! I do think that age difference can work. I have the same.
He was a good man!
I'm so sorry for your loss...widow life is hard. No other man could ever replace mine, married 35 when he suddenly flew with the angels. He was my person, even now. He was almost ten yrs older than me and was 65 when he passed, 5 yrs ago. Cannot imagine even thinking about dating- I'm not sure why the universe sent me one of her videos, but it's interesting to see... and sad in a way too that many men are so superficial, especially old ones. Smh. Being lonely is hard. Being with the wrong person, much harder. Its singlehood for me.
I'm dating someone 12 years younger, and I had some worries about getting serious but he was persistent and doesn't care one bit. He's more mature than anyone my age that I've dealt with - and he is the youngest I've had. I do worry about aging, and staying youthful, but I'm a competitive bodybuilder and am doing my best. We work out together and laugh a lot - and when I am feeling insecure about anything, he is there with reassurance. Now I couldn't imagine my life without him.
I'm also in that situation too, as a woman, with a 12-years younger man. He does not care one bit, so why should I?
I don’t think in this day and age 12 years is actually that bad. I think age gaps of threat these days is probably 16 years plus.
If these men have kids already or you are happy to be a mother if they want children there’s no reason why the age gap of 12 should be an issue. You both should not actually look like there’s a big age gap unless one of you doesn’t take good care of your health or appearance.
A man the same age could leave you for a younger woman. You have things in common; I say enjoy the companionship!
You don't need to worry about looking younger, just aging gracefully. Most of us love the look of an older woman. The more your age you look the hotter it is really.
@chumbucket6184 thank you for that !
I am a 63 year old single retired male. This is not a comment on this video, but your channel in general. Somehow the algorithm sent me one of your videos and I was hooked immediately. Your personality, poise, confidence, articulation and video style ( being slightly back farther from the camera and a lower left aspect) makes you less a talking head (as many channels are) and more a friend over for coffee. Your conversation style feels so natural and honest I want to know what and why you think what you do. I just hit subscribe! Good luck with your channel and I look forward to more from you neighbor!
I agree, damo! When people get so close you can see their nose hairs, it bugs me. It doesn't hurt that Holly is gorgeous, inside and out.
What a lovely thing to say to someone. You’ll never know the impact this has on a person - so kind of you.
@@EdelweisSusie Did you read between the lines?
Tough luck, old man. I’m retired, younger than you, and have a second date with this lovely lady.
@thevet2009 LOL!
My neighbor is 82 and her husband is 68. They both look 50 and and no one would know if they didn’t tell everybody 😂. They are energetic and fun to be around! They have been happily married for over 35 years! ❤
I love that
There’s 12 years between me and my guy and it’s not noticeable. Also, he’s 6’3” and I’m 4’11. He’s White I’m Black. 😅
@@Angrymobs62 sounds like a beautiful relationship ❤️
I’m also 4’11”! I end up with tall guys too.
An 82 yr old looking 50? C'mon now. Lol
Wtaf with that guy working on your car talking to you that way! I hope you told him off, left a review about his behavior and never gave him another dime!
20 years older, him. 24 years of wedded bliss. Not without challenges but we have weathered many storm and are still in love. If you rely on society to carve your path and rules you will fail. We don’t give a darn what anyone thinks. We are happy and that’s all that matters. Don’t give up
Good point. Where was “Society” when you needed it to find someone both appropriate and suitable for you?
Who mind challenges as you are happy
@@genxx2724 In what regard?
@@YOLONOW5280 introducing you to appropriate suitable men who were attractive and appealing. Nobody puts out the effort and bothers, then when you make a life with someone much younger, they criticize.
My boyfriend of2 yrs is 18 yrs younger, i’m 54. We live together, have a lot of fun, laughs, great intimacy…I think you end up with the soul you were meant to meet and the rest is just superficial stuff… follow your heart!
I'm 67 and my wife is 76. We've been married for 43 years and never experienced a social reaction you describe. Has never been an issue.
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You may have more wrinkles and look about the same age....there are always exceptions to everything
I really think if there’s a true soul connection then age doesn’t matter. I’ve been seeing someone for a month now who is 18 years younger than me. I felt an immediate soul connection with him. And he makes me feel more valued than any man has in the past decade. Also with an older man you do still have to try to retain your youthfulness. The last man I dated my age ended up leaving me for a woman 20 years younger than me. He also never told me I was beautiful but my younger man tells me I’m stunning all the time. I think we place too much emphasis on age.
It's no one business. Do you what makes you happy
Omg. Just the other day you were at 7k subscribers. Wow, just a few days and you’re at 10k?? Congratulations!!! Love watching your videos. I’m a almost 60 year old female. You’re very open and honest. Love your views on it all.
I always feel that the greatest love is the relationship you have with your self. When you put you first... everything else falls in place.
Every women in the western world has been doing this for the last 60 years. More than first, only.Working well eh
Wow! This video was great! I TOTALLY get where you're coming from. When I was younger and living in LA, most of my relationships were with older men. Then I moved to Japan and almost all of my relationships were with younger men. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I think what makes your channel so great is that we can all feel like we're having a good chat with a friend! Cheers!
I am with an older man, 14 years, and he is now ill. Although there is much love, I feel 90 % nurse for 24/7. I never have a day off.
I will not advice this route to anyone, that said.... I experience a very true amazing love through out the entire relationship of 30 years and I never missed anything. So there is a balance ❤❤❤
No guaranty in life,that a spouse of your age couldn't get sick, what then?
@dooremieke.janssens1240 Thank you, dear, it put it all in perspective.
And it is true. My husband had a stroke, with severe brain damage...and I main black holes instead of grey brain cells. And that is what I miss the most, his intelligence, his power, his communication, to be equally.
Thank you for your support, I appreciate it 🙏😘
Very good that there is a balance❤.
Hope you can relax, it's important for your health.
I try to spend times without my boyfriend who is 5 years older and has been severely ill for more than a year.
@@A.S.Harfenklang Thank you, I think you understand me. I take in your advice. You too take care 🌻❤️
You bring up a lot of good points about dating someone a lot younger if you are a woman. Hampering his ability to have children and considering how you would feel if he were your son certainly speaks to the integrity and wisdom you gave the situation. I would feel the same way, plus I think it would be very disempowering to always be trying to be young to fit in. Thanks for sharing.
How are you doing Kathy, Good Morning
I have dated women much older than me for many years. I’m 70 and dated several women in their mid eighties and one in their nineties. They really appreciate what I have done for them. And I love their mature beauty.
My wife was 10 years older than me, I was paralysed when we met, we were together for 34 years, she sadly died 4 years ago, she was a fabulous gorgeous wife. She would have been 78 this Christmas.
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Much younger men are fun and I had a great deal of fun for 2 years! I never thought of it as a sustainable relationship and we parted with after some time no bad feelings. "society" doesn't interest me maybe because I come from a large city. He was sweet and funny and so cute When I was with him I felt and acted like a teenager. It was just perfect at that time. But I always knew it wasn't a relationship . I was 60 , he was 36. Time well spent from my point of view.
I can't believe that anybody would dare to give an opinion about your relationship without being asked.
I believe it, Americans are much more straightforward and in your face than Europeans or Canadians (if that’s where you’re from).
It is possible that person giving this unsolicited advice was just trying to be helpful since this video explains that the pitfalls of such a relationship are real. Personally, I’m not surprised the two relationships did not work out. The one guy did not have parents who were in his life. What kind of young guy dates a much older woman? Well the kind of guy that probably has issues and that you should most likely avoid.
Oh, honey. Rudeness is beyond anything we've ever known!
@@econhelp583 This is very judgmental, don't you think so? An alternative explanation is that we are different and not everybody thinks or does like you, how about that?
But men are not so offen commented on dating younger girls. Is thoutless blatant rude injustice!!!
I really appreciate this video. I can totally see you dating men younger than yourself given your appearance and flexible mindset. I'm so sorry it didn't work out. I was curious how long each relationship lasted. I think you were very thoughtful ending it for the reason that you did. You really put a lot of care into the relationship. I feel like you're far ahead of most men your own age and it would make sense why you had two relationships with younger men. In my opinion, the mechanic at the garage made egregious comments that had nothing to do with you. It was some type of projection of his own personal situation that he was attempting to place onto you. I truly wish you all the best.
I think it depends on the connection between the two parties, not what society thinks. It's your life, not theirs.
My husband is 5 years younger than me. We've been together for 30 years. His mom, at first said, I was using him for sex. LMAO!!!! I was 27, fit and took great care of myself, still do. He still lived at home with mom and dad while completing college after 4 years in the military. We were friends first because he was fun, kind, driven in his future goals, smart and respectful. Qualities that I desired in a life partner. Couldn't help but fall in love with him.
My ex and father of my kids was 6 and physically I look younger than him but his lack of maturity made me quit after 12 years together. We are in our 50s now and he looks like 15 years older than his menopausal ex😂
I'm 51 and I don't like dating younger men right now because the men always have young kids and ex-wife or baby mama drama. I usually date 10 years older.
I met four men in their 50s online. They were all divorced with high school and college kids, and ex-wives who were entitled to lifetime spousal support because they had been stay-at-home wives. No thank you.
@@genxx2724 - That's unfortunate. I did meet one man like that too. He drove with Uber in addition to having a full-time job to pay the lifetime alimony.
"They either want a nurse or a purse", as the saying goes. The last relationship I was in, he was 14 years younger. He ended up needing two hip replacements and he was in his early fifties! I took great care of him (nurse) and of course was purchasing a lot of food to include in that care (purse). We had discussions on how he might eventually have to care for me someday. He swore up and down he could and would. I got a puppy, and he didn't lift a finger to help out! Therefore, it's not what someone says, it's what they do that speaks volumes!!! Many lessons learned. Thank God I got a puppy, she showed me who he really was before it was too late.
I think it is a nurse WITH a purse..lol. Yes, men tend to be selfish on average. Women are the nurturers on average. Kick him to the curb asap.
He just wasn't interested in playing pet parent. If he never said he's got all this love to give and needs a fur friend for an outlet, don't be surprised if he's not interested in scrubbing carpets trying to toilet train it or walk it with worn out hips.
A younger bloke chasing an older lady ain't in it for the love honey. Of he wanted love, he'd pursue a younger woman.
I love dogs. I have Border Collies. One cornerstone of my current relationship is that he loves dogs & dogs love him! Yes. Take the dog over the man (if he can't man up with a dog he can't man up with you~!)
@@cruiser6260 lol his hips were new by then! He did express interest. But what a person says/does might be different.
My gal is 8 years older than me. I met her when she was 60 and she’s now she’s 80. She is still a size 2 and I saw a pic of her when she was about 45 and she literally looked like a movie star. She’s still beautiful to me. I’m lucky she doesn’t know how gorgeous she is or I’d never have had the chance.
You didn't tell her how beautiful she is????
My great grandmother was 14-15 years older than her 2nd husband. They stayed together through two world wars and the great depression. It's a situation that has occurred throughout history and all cultures. The relationship is no one's business but the two involved. We are too concerned in this day and age about what others think. Variety is the spice of life. Why wear masks to impress others? Each person's life is their own. As far as children, men can father any time and may have other relationships after an older mate passes away. We try to control so much...if love finds you, just be happy.
@@TinaRouse-s1y Agree 👍
Good point that they can have kids later. No need to feel bad then😅
Brilliantly said! My uncle is 12 yrs older than my aunt. My dad was 10 yrs older than my mum. My godmother was around 8 or 9 yrs older than my godfather. Being surrounded by couples with an age gap has normalised age gap relationships for me somewhat. I'm actually interested in someone 7 years younger than me. Honestly, it does worry me a bit BUT I just need to remind myself of age gap relationships that I know of which have worked.
Finally, a balanced comment, not so weighted by all the prejudices that we hear around. I find these generalisations so boring and uselss... We heard them all before, give us some different stories! Negativity we all know it too welll. We all know good stories exist, there is no one rule for everybody. Thank you for this!
@@sophiesoprano😂😂😂
Im 23 years older than my fiance. We have been together 7 1/2 years and its amazing. We are best friends and feel just as passionate as we did in the beginning. Weve had to navigate around his family issues but not mine. I worry about the agjng, but who’s to say if I was with somebody closer to my own age, that they would stay faithful as I age out? Bottom line is, nobody else that I’ve ever been with has expressed and demonstrated as much love as he does towards me. There are no guarantees in relationships, no matter what the age between the two partners.
You've been together 7 and 1/2 years - are you just calling him your fiance to make it sound better?
Can you give this man children?
@@Apbt-rv7zw a lot of men don't want children which adds to the attraction of dating older women
@hideoussails1783 most men want children and to start families. The biological drive to procreate and work to support families is what spurs most men on.
While some men (a minority) will get with older women they at some stage fade out and pursue younger women.
The very small subset of men you speak of who don't want children would be statistically insignificant to the global populace of men who do want children. Also they don't have to get with older women to not want to have children.
@Apbt-rv7zw men aren't stupid. If they want children they're more likely to get with a younger woman in the first place
As a 62 year old man,I like women at or around my age..
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@@Detman329 do they like You?
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Whatever turns you on.
I am 63, dating a man who is 47. We are perfectly matched. Our time together is always amazing.
I think your age gap probably just makes it to being doable as a long term good outcome. I have the view that 16 years plus is where the long term outcome starts to decline in lasting because of age differences. I mean relationships fall for many reasons that have nothing to do with age, so that also has to be taken into account too.
I dated a man 19 years younger than me for almost 5 years. I'm childfree, and he doesn’t want kids either. I look about 10 years younger than my age, and I'm very energetic and sporty. Everything was great between us - we shared hobbies and passions, and we loved spending time together. He used to visit almost every weekend, and sometimes even during the week. I never really noticed people staring at us. I look younger and even though he also looks much younger for his age, so we never got any bad looks or comments.
I met his family, but I preferred to keep things intimate between us. I didn’t attend holidays like Christmas with his family and was comfortable with our long-distance arrangement.
However, I eventually found out that he kept talking to other women online. Although he showed me a lot of affection, bought gifts and flowers, supported me, and was there when I needed him, he couldn't stop connecting with new women. While the conversations weren’t really flirtatious, I just couldn’t accept it. It’s been two months since I ended things, and it’s been really hard. He tried to reach out but never actually apologized. I realize now that he’s 28 and still discovering himself, so I decided to just let him go.
you had fun for five years, but a man under 30 still wants to roam around
Reading the first half of your comment… I could have predicted the last paragraph. Of course he was speaking to other women , we women can be so naive.
At some stage, that young man would want to have children and a family. That was probably something you could never give him. As he got older, that imperative for a man to want children would increase.
It's probably natural that he wanted to look at other options with other women.
@@michaelsix9684 Yes, especially if he was 25 when they met.
Good decision. ❤
We do not AGE INSIDE. My last partner was 9 years older and it was never an issue. When she died from a brain tumour I was beside myself with grief. A deep love grew over the years. I know I will never replace her, but I never expected to loose her. THAT is the downside of an older person. We had a great life, good sex, High compatibility. Age is irrelevant but grief is unwelcome and overwhelming.
Sorry for your loss 😢
❤
❤
Im 65, my husband is 48. Been married 24 years. I keep telling him to shoo, but he insists on sticking around. 😂
Seriously, I have no idea why it works, it just does and we're still nuts about each other. ❤
I think the biggest drawback about being with someone much younger is that they are usually not monogamous. ( They don’t have to be in today’s hookup generation.)
A few years ago, I was “love bombed” by a guy 20 years younger. He told me up front he wanted me to be his mistress and travel with him. He also said he liked a variety of women and was not monogamous. I declined his invitation; although, I was very tempted. My husband had died several years earlier, and this guy dragged me out of a state of despair and grief I thought would never end.
I never told him this and hope he is doing well and is happy.
The fact he was love bombing you says that the relationship was probably not very healthy. As you mention, the attention did help you get out of your despair. Attention can be flattering though I hope people look past the words and see how their values align.
At least he was honest about not being monogamous and gave you the benefit of making your decision based on the truth. Being love-bombed can be a delightful thing at first. The same thing happened to me and it made me realize I was still a desirable woman at 73. And he was honest with me, too, and I also declined to take the relationship further. But he reawakened something in me that I was able to keep alive after moving on and so I remain grateful for that relationship,
Good insight! I found that the men who were 10 years younger than me and reached out to date me was because they were immature financially and in other ways. They needed a mom type and leader so it was no deal for me.
Yes, after years of marraige to my husband I realized he needs a Mom, not a partner. I want a partner. He wanted a mother-someone to do the cooking, cleaning, the book keeping & all the thankless tasks like use up my retirement fund and work full time so he can spend money he doesn't have. I would agree with the statements above. He told me, "I thought you were rich when I married you!" I thought he was sober, employed & a gentleman; instead I got an alcoholic that is far from romantic or appreciative and does not communicate at all.
@@joannajohnson696 oh no. How did you not see these things before you got married?
They would be exactly the same with a younger woman too, so I don’t think it’s age is the issue. Some men and some women are just dependent personalities and look for responsible adult partners to balance themselves out.
@@theexoticalaspieladyThat part
I was just recently, less than 2 months ago, in a relationship for 5 years with a man who was 18 years younger than me. People actually kept telling me I looked younger than him and no one ever said a word about us dating. I still love him a lot but my self esteem was suffering because I was always trying to keep the younger side of me going with dress, hair, makeup etc. I am 79 and he is 61. I am content with my life and live a fun adventurous one and I know every day counts. I am not attracted to men my age so I will be single until I go to the other side I think.
I hope not! What if a man could love you the way you are. I know it's hard but if we can love ourselves (also hard) and accept the way we look I know from experience the man in your life will love you. Some men really don't care as much as we think they do
The car employee wanted you and was jealous of the young guy.
Yeah i can't tell where that guy was coming from, but if i had to guess i'd say he was somewhat jealous. He has issues if he felt the need to tell her that totally rude, unsolicited and unuseful opinion. I'd only excuse it if he had some previous bad experience with a situation like that whether it involved him or he got to observe as third person, but still, he should've reserved his opinion to himself.
Nah....guys dont act like that....thats what women do
Please don’t stop these videos. We 60+ need them.
I totally agree with your comments. I'm a gay man, 60, and have dated younger guys for short periods of time. I feel that up to 10 years younger works, more than doesn't. Two points you made that I have always felt. I missed the connection (you talk about The Captain and Tennille, Mary Tyler Moore, the Carpenters) and they have no idea about you're talking about. Also, dating much younger guys makes me feel OLDER, not younger (as you said). These were the two biggest issues. Society stuff didn't bother me, as it's very common in gay relationships to have a large age difference.
I dated a younger man once. He was 9 yrs. Younger. He treated me so well! He wined & dined me alot! We Went to Gatlinburg and he rented us a Condo. We had the best time together! I truly cared about him! I ended the relationship because I was 44yrs. old at that time and wasn't planning on anymore kids. I felt like her needed a chance to have kids of his own. I hurt him when I broke it off and it was really hard to stay away! Found out this yr. he died 3yrs. ago. 😢 I will always have fond memories of him. ❤
Did he marry and have children after you broke up? Just curious... I'm 45 years old and in a relationship with a 39 years old. I never had children and don't want to have any. I always give him space and already told him that I understand if he wants to look for a younger woman to have children...
You could remain friends probably, didn't need to break up. Ig a person id good, he can be good as a friend too probably.
@@kitty1256x They could have agreed to a family relationship. She could have been an aunt to his children, if he married and had children. You never know what life will bring. Look what happened. They may as well have stayed together.
Did he even want children?
It’s also wrong for older women to tell younger men what they should want. Maybe he would want kids, or maybe he wouldn’t. You can’t insist that he should go find someone to have kids with if he was truly happier being with you without kids and wanting that. What you are doing is pushing someone away and that’s not fair either. He’s an adult and gets to decide what he wants. If you felt that you were too old for him then why even get involved in the first place?
I know what you mean. i was always younger looking too. one day my son and I were eating at a restaurant and a woman passed by us and said , look at the cougar! in a derogatory way and I thought I'm not doing anything but having lunch with my son lol. another time my other son had his arm around me while we were walking through the mall and OH MY! the looks we got. I don't know why it's looked at any different than men dating a much younger woman, but of course the old double standard in society is still there.
Men dating younger women DOES look gross BUT it has been accepted in society ages before we were born. We really can’t do anything about it.
That woman Sounds like a creep. My divorced colleague moved to a new house, and was out front washing the car and got into a water fight with his teenage daughter. The neighbors were giving him dirty looks. They thought she was his girlfriend.
@@rosamoreno4794 it's not gross, it's not society - it's just biology. You could argue it's different today but what's 30-40 years in thousands of years of human evolution?
Same with me and my son, I posted about this before I saw your comment. My son doesn't even put his arm around me, people just hate us anyway. lol
@@doncorleone3901 not true! A couple of hundred years ago in Europe it was common to that a younger man married an older widow, took care of her business and when she passed he married a younger woman to have children with and so on. It was a way to to preserve property and make sure older women were taken care of
I am a 57 year old black female who was recently in a 15 year relationship with a white male who was one year older. It seems the people who had problems with our relationship were middle age and senior white women. I loved it. As a black woman we see on a daily basis white women with black men; so my attitude was to smile and in my mind, I would say “deal with it”.
These women are surely woke liberals and democrat voters - on the surface 😂😂😂
Greetings from Europe!
@@justinaoska5901nope here in the us it’s the replubs.
I see the same a white woman with a black guy. Black women hate it!! We are stealing their men!!🤣🤣🤣
Another problem dating 15-20 years younger is the horn dog factor and the mommy issues, ie, they are looking for one. Flakiness is another factor. The problem dating my own age is that the men look terrible. Ironically it is the men who lie about their age stating to be 59 when it’s is obvious they are in their late 70s.
All of those issues are in older guys too😂😂
My sugar mama fooled me for a while by getting waxed down below and regularly retouching roots up above. I thought she was just wild and daring saying don't worry about contraception and when there were no monthlies thought we were having a baby.
Great sharing!! *Stella Got Her Groove Back* vibes. Ya know, I wouldn't date a man--even younger than 5 years than me. Their maturity is so whack. I usually date my exact age or older. And yes..I think it could be fun to date a hot, younger man--in the short term. But, as you said, it is a block to the guy finding a younger person to build a whole life with, in my opinion. Love your dating topic vids!! Keep 'em coming!
As a 70 year old man who has been single for almost 20 years I really have no answer for you except to tell you how I handle those situations. I lived with a woman who was 3 years older than myself I have dated a woman who was 7 years older and I have also dated a woman who was 9 years younger than me. Personally I don’t care what society or others think or say about my relationships or the age difference. I will say though and you touched on it too if the age difference is significant it’s challenging to relate to each other. I live in the St. Louis area so those situations might be quite different for you but at any rate I sincerely wish you and everyone of your subscribers nothing but the best.
My husband is 6 years older than me. We grew up 500 miles apart. Yet we can reminisce about the same tv shows, music, and popular culture of our youth. The shared memories we have are very important to me.
Just date within 5 years either side of your age. Never liked much older or younger. Never worked for me.
My last relationship was with someone 14 years younger and I wasn't comfortable for the reasons you discussed. I haven't dated since because he was a toxic nightmare but if I ever do, they won't be more than a few years younger!
New and subscribing. Well, women do date younger but their relationships don't last long, I have seen across America. However a few older women with younger men do last but only a FEW. I have been reading about this topic for decades now. Being physically fit is very important...............................stay safe out there
Well stated
Where to begin. First of all, if what others think about your actions causes you to not pursue something you might enjoy, you may miss out on a lot. Your choice. Secondly, I used to run a non-profit foster agency. Our first foster family was a couple who married when he was 18 and she was 40. They did have children together, but my point is they remained a solid couple until his death at age 68. She lived to be 93. Admittedly they were likely the exception, not the rule. But had they not taken the chance they would not have discovered how happy they could be. Third, many same aged couples choose to not have children. Fourth, "barren" couples often adopt or become foster parents. My advice would be take the leap if you find someone (adult, of course) no matter what age if you "tickle each other's fancy". I'm 75 y/o (this Christmas) and I lost my wife of 35 years in April. I am devasted and I believe you should take your chance at love when you have the opportunity. You don't know how much time you have. In the words of Langston Hughes, “Folks, I'm telling you, birthing is hard and dying is mean-so get yourself a little loving in between.”
I am so sorry about your loss, You are so right about what you just wrote. Good Morning, How are you doing today?
As a single older woman I have experienced a lot of the same. Dated much younger and dated men I met online. Both experiences taught me a lot. I can’t say I would ever do either again 😢. I love your channel and great topics ❤
The sequence is => compatibility - time together - romance and psychological attraction - appreciation and admiration - physical attraction (no matter how the other person actually looks) - sharing sex as an spiritual complement.
That's the right order. A different order would probably fail. The first thing is having a very high match in similar priorities (regarding not only the top of the ranking but also the bottom of the ranking), things both like, things both dislike,... and from there see if you enjoy time together, and time will tell.
Kindest regards!
Yes!!
Not everybody wants children.
Yes! I never wanted them.
And for those who do, there are other ways to bring children into your family.
Exactly. And there is such a stigma, even now. This horrible perception that if you don't have children that means you're selfish and not as much of a woman, not complete, something is wrong with you. Even other women will look down on you and treat you differently. Also if a woman doesn't have children, it doesn't mean she's a person who dislikes children, she usually loves children, there are so many reasons why she may not have children. Think of a comment that a recent politician made about being a childless cat lady, that was awful and so ignorant. It's funny how if a woman has dogs it's another story. I could go on but not in a text on UA-cam. But all I know is so many women with children shouldn't have children. And just because you can give birth, doesn't mean you're a mother.
They don't when they are in their 20's, but most do as they mature. Even into my 40s I could be mistaken for much younger, but already had children and a life of grown-up responsibilities. Younger men were commonly attracted to me. I can tell you that without exception I found those men extremely immature & lacking in life experience. There was virtually no chance of developing a real relationship of equals. We weren't equals in any way. If short-lived fun & games is what you're looking for, maybe. And in most cases, no, their parents aren't very welcoming. Especially when you already have children. Most men really aren't financially established until at least their mid-thirties, so you are likely to be picking up the cost of the fun you have. It can work out in some cases, at least for awhile, if you are a wealthy celebrity . . . Seems to be with Cher & her BF, who is nearly 30 years younger. But, hey, we're talking about Cher!😮
Just came across your channel yesterday and I must say, I'm loving your videos. You are so warm, and matter of fact on your observations, and as a soon to be single 61 year old female, I really appreciate the subjects you are speaking on. I've also been enjoying the comments. Thank you for putting yourself out there to bring these things to light.
Age is not important. True love finds a way ❤.
I found my soulmate when I was in my early 20s and she was married to someone else. We have been together through thick and thin for 44 years. Being in a shallow relationship, or ending one for superficial reasons is quite alien to me.
I’m so sorry for the abuse you’ve suffered from awful men. I think you are blessed with beauty, youthfulness, and grace. Thank you for your wonderful videos! I wish you all the best 🙏❤️
Are you also sorry for the abuse wich many men suffer from awful and terrible women?
This happens also.
Stop splitting and dividing
10k! 🎉 you’re ’blowing up’ as the cool kids say 😊
I dated a man 20 years younger for almost 2 years and I definitely would not do that again ..... but i'm DEFINITELY glad I did it once. It opened a whole new universe for BOTH of us.
When you say a whole new world, I would like to hear more because I just ended a relationship with a man 18 years younger and I'm sad about it. I miss lots of parts of the relationship but not others.
My daughter in law (same age as my son) called me in tears this week because they found out they likely can’t have kids. I love and support them just as much without the prospect of grandchildren. My oldest daughter, doesn’t date and is super happy single, no grandchildren there either. I don’t love or support my kids any less for that. Children are never guaranteed and that you would end a relationship of your own over the loss of a theoretical problem for your son, that says more about you and your friends than anything else. It seems to me that the issue is really that you couldn’t take the external societal pressure, as well as the mass amount of it you have internalized over the years.
Yeah, I’m 65. I had been married. She divorced me. I’m single now. I went through a lot of drama with the mama. I now own a truck. I just bought some property and I bought a small John Deere tractor to work that property. I’m on a pension and debt free and can travel the world. Anytime I want is all with the hand of God that led me to this point. I have all the freedom in the world each and every day and night, I realize that relationships can be very difficult. I see it over and over again and I don’t have to go through any narcissist abuse anymore.
The wisest thing I heard was from Martha Stewart- If you want to be happy for one year get married; if you want to be happy for ten years get a dog; if you want to be happy for life be a gardener. So true.
@@rebeccabsomanybooks3558 I love that! And I love my garden.
I'd say that the most successful relationships are those where the two people are on the same page of life. If you are with someone much younger, your life experiences are so different. You have more history in your past and you know more history about how the world functions. Not to say it can't work, but it works better the more you have in common.
Hi. Congratulations on 10K . 👋🏽
Love your videos. Word of advice. Put more of yourself in the frame, less of the ceiling. Keep up the good work!❤
That’s super weird about the guy working on your car saying that! As far as any of my sons, I’d be fine with them dating much older, as long as she made him happy. I’m 12 years older than my husband of 17 years. He tries to look older, growing a very long gray beard lol I’m not crazy about the age difference.
That guy working in your car should mind his own beeswax
😊
Thanks for sharing your experience. I've dated many much younger men and had longer term relationships with a couple of men. I hear your frustration about negative opinions from the public and your friends. Me, I acknowledge that a part of my mind (the inner child) seems concerned with what others think but the truth is, what is most important to me, is that I'm true to myself and as authentic as I can be. If I feel a love connection with someone and its mutual, and the relationship is healthy and life affirming, age is irrelevant. I actually don't see the relevance of comparing yourself with your son's potential situation. It seems like an entirely different situation. I would imagine that someone 15 or 23 years younger than you is, like you, a mature person, mature enough to know whether they wanted someone they could have kids with or not. I would not appreciate a so called friend projecting their agenda on me and asking a question that seems steeped in their judgement of your very personal choice. Love is love. If two people choose to be together its entirely their business. And when it comes to our children...once they are adults its their path to walk...I'm currently working on myself and allowing (within my mind) my 24 year old son to date who he wants of course. It's his business and not mine to interfere. I just want him to be happy. Like me, he's going to make mistakes and probably learn some hard lessons. That's life. You are very youthful looking and a beautiful woman. I myself am in my late 50's and finally learning to be me. Living solo and choosing to be quiet with a lot of self care. I trust that if I'm meant to be sharing time with someone that the opportunity will show up in Divine Timing. I'm learning to have a loving relationship with me. Meditation. nature, crafting and community service bring joy to my life. After dating people of varying ages I truly feel now its about the person and the connection you have together. Relationships seem to basically be for helping each other heal. This can seem harmonious or challenging. Self love and self respect is paramount. When this is stable it seems the right people are in my field and the ones that are not kind don't get to me so much. They can have their opinions. Opinions...everyone seems to have one! Enjoy your life....solo or in company (good, fun company hopefully). Hang in there Sistar. You are amazing! I've only seen two of your videos. I look forward to watching more.
I dated a man 22 yrs younger than me. Had a great connection, but I agree with you on the generational issues. I guess Cher and Madonna are happy with it 😂, but a big no from me.
My fianceé is 39 i am 28 and we both feel like there isn't an actual gap. We relate very much to eachother and have everything in common, even details about our lives, our childhoods, values, mentality, politics, life goals, relationship goals. We're like brother and sister almost.
I've always had an easier time connecting with older women.
I think the trouble people have in age gap relationships like ours is the same as any other relationship. People don't know how to date, how to vet, how to choose someone, they just go for feelings and after the first 6 months fade you have no chemical cocktail left to buffer the fact that you have nothing in common.
I think you are gorgeous and look much younger than your age ❤, I think you should do more dating research videos.
Appreciate your honest and vulnerable opinion about how dating a younger person makes you feel more insecure about your own age or aging process. Insecurities that you can not control nor rectify through intellectual amélioration or awareness, as some insecurities can't simply be conquered because we are just mere mortals at the end of the day. And that's ok to avoid them instead of highlighting them by seeking them
I'm 46 and happy with my husband of 4 years who is 27. We're best friends. The only person who was against our relationship was his mom (6 years older then me). She is wise enough to make it seem like she's fine with our marriage now:) All the people arround me supported my choice: friends, family, colleagues.
You are right, I do feel more aware of my age now when i'm with him. But he's the one to always reassure me i'm beautiful. And i know for him - i am.
As for him not having kids, he will be able to easily find a younger woman even after 10-15 years. Men are still "good to go" in their 40s, you know:) Right now it's not a problem for him so why should it be for me? Nobody knows how long will any of us live or what tomorrow will bring. And if I can be happy TODAY, why shouldn't I?
I think beyond an age difference beyond several years, there can easily be a clash. You mention this. There is something about the references you have with a peer that is comforting.
It's interesting to hear how it is with the over fifty women, me being sixty now. I have ended relationships with amazing women, over children in the past. They needed a family and I didn't want them to miss out. It is a surprise to me that there are a lot of younger attractive women wanting to date older men. I am not rich. You look great, by the way. I like your video's and appreciate your honesty. :)
My gal who was 12 years older than I was wonderful partner. Am 67 now and I lost her at 50. Was just sad that her health took her so early.
I've haven't been able to date younger women. Most definitely hard to get along with 40 year old or younger.
Found myself more interested in the older gals in my retirement community.
But there is a challenge for me with women that are in the 70 plus age group. I enjoyed the company and companion opportunity. But found the fact that an secure financial and still look young for my age . Am fit and healthy energy. So older women don't seem secure with me as a relationship.
I hear it in conversations and I know it's a lot to expect more .
I been finding older women aren't interested in sexual desires. Not all but the woman who I been friends with are negative on sex. So am I just meeting the wrong folks.
The 1971 film Harold and Maude is one of my favorite movies 🍿
I have dated a few women older than I am and it was mostly great. But now, as we all grow older, I find the older women to be bitter due to getting burned in past relationships. Younger women are more open minded and happier. This isn't about looks, it's about attitude, and I know older women can't forget their past. But I also know I shouldn't have to pay for men that wronged them.
Hello Jim, How are you doing this morning, Good Morning
Your seating arrangement looks very cozy the way you have a wall to your right and the window to your left with you right in the middle with scenic paintings behind you, very homey!!!
My husband is 24 and I'm 41. We've been together for 6 years. It takes being confident and secure in yourself to be with someone a lot younger. I'm greying and have stopped coloring and let my natural come through. We've had a few comments and looks over the years but we know what we have and let any negativity slide like water off a ducks back.
I’ve only dated 3-7 years younger, and most people thought I was younger than the guys. I also don’t think I could do more than 10 years younger because of the generational issues you mention.
Your doing better than you think. Great videos. I’m proud of you..
You need to be yourself.....If you cannot be yourself around someone that is much younger than you, it is NOT WORTH pursuing the relationship. My advice to everyone: BE YOURSELF
There is absolutely no right or wrong. Your experience was for just for YOU to figure out what works just for YOU!
I am posting here a part of the letter my great-grandmother received from her sister, dated June 13, 1921 - Dublin:
"My Dear Hilda,
"Love found me very late, after years of misery in my life I thought I already paid my dues, but I was wrong: He is 37 years old! Onun annesi olabilirdim, how to deal with 21 years of age difference?
I am not expecting you to understand my love or my pain, I feel like dying. So, this was the true love and he is the man I wanted and waited for all my life... I could not do it, so I made an arrangement to live in a monastery for the rest of my life. You can't believe how useful a woman at my age can be helping others.
Please do not look for me."
Nothing has changed in a century!
As a 42-year-old man who likes older women, this discourages me a little. I'm open to dating women my own age, but I would also like to date women older than me, but most older women don't want to date a man significantly younger than them.
If someone comes along,they will have to be special,bc I deserve better and will be picky now
I suspect that the man who was 23 years younger than her (if true) was actually the one who ended the relationship.
You should think a few things before getting involved with a much older person.
In a large age gap, are you compatible emotionally and physically with the other person?
Do they have the money to retire together and to enjoy their life together, or is the older one going to wait until 88 years old for the other to reach 65 and start their retirement life of activities and travel?
Are you willing to become the caregiver to the much older partner later in life?
Are you OK if your much older partner passes away and you are left alone to care for yourself?
Also consider the fact that nobody has a crystal ball, and unpredictable things happen in life. The younger person could very well die first due to an accident or disease.
So keep it private. Both you and the younger person may have concern, fear of social judgment, so have your relationship without the social cavorting.
For a minute, I thought I was watching the true confessions of Joan Collins.
My second husband was 10 years younger. When I was 36 and he was 26 it wasn't any big deal at all. 12 years later it still wasn't a big deal but I got really sick of his inexperience bad spending habits etc don't think age had anything to do with it
I haven't dated more than 5 or 6 years younger than I am, and I don't think I'd ever cross the 10 years younger line, but I do like to see women out there doing it if only to show both men and women that its not only something a man can do
I'm 50 and have always dated women somewhat older than me. There was 19 years between my mom and step dad and they had the best relationship I have ever seen. Only issue was the last 2 years before my step dad passed his care and the age difference very hard on my mother, Btw. You are a beautiful and amazing woman!
The problem with dating younger, especially for those who have a self-image of looking young, is that next to a truly young person the older looking skin etc. is more apparent. Aside from the heads up on the obligatory underage guessing, it always annoys me when seniors announce how young they think they look. For me, it goes from meeting an attractive well-seasoned person to an annoying one. I would have assumed you were in your sixties, and I suspect you know you looked younger when you were whatever age you suppose you look to be. Another problem, which you have mentioned or talked around, is that as soon as there is a health issue, it's a problem. That is because the younger person is looking for someone to take care of them, not the other way around. Obviously, your video just showed up on my feed despite my never searching for anything of the like lol. So, the algorithms are with you, my friend. Congratulations and much success. I do have a thought on dating your own age. What would happen if, instead of bristling with offense at a less than kind remark on your appearance, you would flip the conversation with how attractive you find your date and verbally focusing on his qualities?
As a Clinical Psychotherapist. You should seek some professional help. Remember comment say more about who you are than what you are commenting about.
@@MitelefonoRoman Perhaps. And, I could say the same about you. Or, perhaps you could explain to me how searching for True Crime, Cooking Shows, Indiana Fever Highlights, Hurricane Helene Relief Efforts, Couponing, Tofu, Ryobi lawn mower repair, Choir Choir Choir, and Coffee Shop Music would kick up this video, that would be amazing. I am happy for her success, but obviously, her video is really being pushed. If we are going to get off the subject matter and start analyzing what lies beneath, that is what I would like to know the answer to as I find it curious.
@@ellefaye448
...hoping it wasn't the True Crime😂
Tried it once, hated it! I'll stick to men my own age with whom I have more in common and shared life experiences. Thanks for sharing your experience as well Holly. Too bad people have to be so judgmental; it just makes it harder on the couple and it's unfair, really.
Girl, sounds like you over thought dating younger men. They don't care about if you're dressing trendy or the things that you mentioned. I mean, your concerns are legitimate but at the end of the day men know what they want and they act on that.
I can't believe you have gotten such comments! You are very youthful -look fantastic. And people rarely make such criticisms with all the older men who are with much younger women. But, I agree that there is a generation gap/experience gap between people over 10 years younger. But, at the same time, I dated some guys who were 10 years younger and those men acted older than me.
I don't know about people rarely making comments when it's an older man and younger woman. My husband is 18 and a half years older than me. We've been married 25 years and the looks and comments have never stopped. If anything they've gotten worse because thankfully I have aged well. When his boss met me the first time he just declared, "This is WRONG." lol
After their divorce, my mother married a man 16 year younger than her and my father married a woman 14 years younger. They both have been married to their new partners around 30 years and both seem to have made it work.
Age gap relationship. He’s younger. It can work if you stop worrying and caring about others judging you. Yes people can be very rude and nosey. But if you let others bully you into believing you’re not worthy to be with someone younger, your relationship and self esteem will suffer. I’m a very private person and don’t meddle in how others live so I find it particularly irritating when people meddle in my life. They look but they seldom comment. If they do, I don’t acknowledge them as I do not owe anyone any explanations.
If you love someone, and they love you back and treat you well, then be happy and be with them. Don’t let anyone tell you who you can and cannot love. If they don’t like it, that is their problem. It’s your life and your business. Live it YOUR way.
I was asked out by a much younger man, but he dropped the ball & it never happened. A slightly younger man asked me out around the same time, and he also dropped the ball. That's ok. I was a little curious, but I was happy to be in my singlehood when my current boyfriend asked me out. He's 1 year younger, lol.
Oh this was a great one!
I was reluctant to get into a relationship with a man 12 years my junior. I was 40. He persuaded me and we finally got married and had a daughter. He had other children and so did I, this daughter was like a golden child to us. We were married for 20 years, then when I was 60 (on disability) he just walks out. He was controlling of everything and I went along with it to keep the peace and make him happy. Now I’m starting over trying to figure out who I am now….. never do that again, follow your gut
My wife of 32 years passed away two years ago and re-entering the dating world has been amusing - recognizing that I am the root cause of most of the humor. Once you have made 60 trips around the sun, you are pretty set in your ways and in many ways this simplifies determining if you have a good fit with someone. Obviously, no one is going to change at this point in life. I have dated women 12 year older than me and 12 years younger than me. I really do not think that span of years is that big of a deal - but the life experiences certainly are. Relax , if it is meant to be, it will happen. In the mean time, I pray you are happy. Best of Luck, Becoming Me
You made a good point in that there is something about being in the same generation, with the same experiences, for example, I'm a millennial, and having another person to discuss certain universal topics that would have affected us the same at different ages of development is comforting and feels "safe" like a cornerstone to understanding each other, I think, just a basic already pre-built in feel for their emotional and mental landscape, down to experiencing the same types of music of different eras, etc.. I can't feel comfortable with anyone when there is an age gap of more than 2 or 3 years honestly, in either direction, so that's a tiny window. I am open to dating older men, if the right person was there, because I appreciate a mature mindset, until I start to think about how his prom was when I was three years old or something, however, and then the age difference just feels icky, but I agree with this video that younger has also felt equally cringe. It's an imbalance, somehow, somewhere. Like with an older person, you expect a certain level of treatment, just because you are with someone older, and with a younger person, you automatically have a tiny assumption to feel superior or like you are the more dominant one, until suddenly - you're not.