Why Does a Narcissist appear Caring During a Crisis?
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- Опубліковано 28 лип 2024
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00:00 Intro
00:57 Narcissist's need for attention
02:18 Narcissist's reputation
04:02 Narcissist's desire to avoid negative consequences
04:33 Conclusion
They pretend to care just for the sake of their reputation, and eventually they forget about everything because it's of no importance to them. It's crazy
They are the crazy ones!!
@@LION-on4gd They are demons in disguise
Only for their admiration and benefit to be recognized by others. .
Thank you Danish for this important message! They falsely try to gain your trust at a time when you are in need of help, because to them you look like an easy target for abuse. They see someone they think they can control easily to do their bidding, whatever that is, giving them intel, money, attention, supply. They wear you down under the guise of "sincere concern", while they stab you in the back. Don't waste your precious time and energy on them "just in case" they may help you. Hold on for the genuine help when it comes. You are worth it.
This is so true
There is yet another reason. They really fear losing you. It is called abandonment anxiety.
Yet another reason is to gain self supply by convincing themselves to be caring and protective.
It is mainly out of fear.
I think they seem caring because they like to see you in pain and appearing caring gives them a center front row seat to the show especially if they can get you to unload all of your feelings…
There are people that they don't fool ; there are people they are extremely unkind to and these people see them as they are
You are a blessing to me on understanding narcissistic abuse
And that's exactly why it's so difficult to expose them for what they truly r
Because it makes them look empathetic, which they are not. So it makes them look good .
My ex narc cared for me for six months after an accident. I felt blessed to have him. Then I started to get better and the manipulations started. It seemed that I had to remain submissive and compliant to his views on anything and everything.
Excellent video Danish. The narc will be supportive during a crisis because it is part of their act as a good person. These creatures have to become concerned about the situation and play along so they don't look like they don't care. The narc has no real interest in any one but themselves. They need supply and attention and some times they have to pretend that others matter to keep the charade going. Stay away. HEAL God bless
….Manipulation, to get whatever it is he wanted at the time, to look like the hero to others, to use it for future “hanging it over my head” type of situations…
Yes exactly! It is always transactional
As usual you are spot on they appear caring because they want to be the hero. My narc ex fooled me for so many years I thought he was so caring and went out of his way to help others but, he always expected something in return.
💐✋💐
Either, the narcissist wants to tell others ' I am a good person.'
Or he intends to backstabbing his wife , the narcissist cannot do good to others for no reason as everything must benefit him at the end.
🎭 I agree. As a daughter of a covert narcissistic mother who was a nurse until she retired, I would say keeping up appearances as "helpful" in this way is an easy mask to fake. They can simply observe others and mimic what they do. Then, they can enjoy the praise for all of their "helpfulness" later on. They can even feign embarrassment at all of the praise or thanks they receive, but inside, they are loving it. My mom actually enjoyed the attention she got when my sister and I got sick as kids. When I became an adult and looked back on her behavior, that was one of the things I thought was most disgusting!
same. mine retired from nursing, but weeks later, the vampiric demon in her wanted more supply so she coerced a former coworker turned facility operator, to give her a job as a part-time nurse. disgusting and disturbing
Why was it disturbing to you that she got another nursing job?
@@pearlsdaughter2281 she is pure evil and sadistic. she enjoys torturing others particularly those who are physically vulnerable and cannot fend for themselves
They are opportunists who try make themselves look good while showing up at funerals etc trying to act like they had never did anything evil to you. If they think you are vulnerable enough they’ll try to get back with you for their supply again.
💯
So true, they are good at showing up at hospitals, funerals, but it’s all for show.
You nailed it once again! My ex pulled that allot whenever I had a seizure or my medical was involved in the crisis. He had everyone believe that we were married yet they didn't know that I had to get my own health coverage (because we weren't married) and I needed government health coverage. And in order to keep that I could only work minimal hours. I couldn't even do full time do to my other health issues do to my seizures. He would yes, give off the impression to the world that he cares, working hard to keep a roof over our head, talk about my condition to others when it occurred, 'helped' by wow picking me up from the ER (on the city bus as he never wanted his license because he'd have to reduce his drinking habit) but within weeks he thinks I'm to be back to normal and on my feet to make income again. As if miracles occur over night. Dude, I got doctor appointments, I still need my health coverage, still have brain damage, got a track record of job loss from a Seizure. He couldn't comprehend on how the system is really set up. These people got their head in the clouds.
@@itstime3900 Thank you for sharing your story and my heart goes out to you for sure! Ones medical condition is serious! Especially epilepsy. I always had a fear of going into one and getting raped (subconsciously maybe that's why I stayed with the narcissist thinking I could wake him up). My family members were like yours to, it's vary sad. My mother did that to, allowed her narcissist character to take over , I was staying with her in another state to get away from my ex narcissist but she pulled her stunt and called the cops to kick me out in a whole different state (I had to work with them and they got her to 'ship' me back to my prior state where I got back with the narcissist (I didn't see then what I see now).
Had an experience with the cops and a seizure when back in my state, went into an Amnesia Seizure after getting off work (a banks cleaner) and they put me under a chapter 51 hold for mental evaluation thinking I was breaking into the bank, you should NEVER cuff up someone having a seizure! I left the narcissist for good with whatever risk when he choked me and hit me in the back of my head when I had brain surgery years ago (for my seizures but obviously failed). Scared as anything on homelessness but out of nowhere I got a miracle and the narcs friend had called me to offer a place to stay.
I will be thinking of you, you got allot on your plate I know. We all need to work together and understand love. Again, thank you so much for sharing your story, it means more than most can understand. Positive thoughts and vibes are for you just the same ❤️
@@itstime3900 🌟To You❣️🍀🕊 They Do Not Have Any Hart You Have A ❤️ Never go back.. Letting Them Stay Stucked In Their Mud Forever!!
Also disabled with a similar thing… until he got sick of taking care of me. He would forget life saving medications and yelled at me the last time I had a mental health crisis. And even when he appeared caring and lied about our relationship he never took time off of work to make sure I was okay. In retrospect, he sometimes made me worse on purpose…
Low vision and a cocktail of severe mental health problems that predated the relationship but has been mostly under control…
Please look into the Carnivore diet . And Dr.Ken Berry you tube videos. Epilepsy and all types of neurological conditions can be healed ! Stay strong .
It's all for show. As soon as you are behind closed doors, you will be punished.
They do it to project an image to other people that they are heroic and selfless. Mine used to set up accidents and put poison in my food, then he would act like he was the most attentive and protective husband.
Of course, at the time I had no idea he was guilty of such evil acts, but as I have slowly unraveled forty years with him, the truth has come to light.
I was always sick then, but since I divorced him, my health and strength have returned. It's been almost five years of hard work and healing, but now my life is sweet and peaceful. Praise The Lord.
Oh God what a devil 😈 but you have gotten away. Thank God take care enjoy your life
They may seem to look like "problem solver" to outsider, while all they do is hiding the problem or making it a problem for someone else, instead of actually solving it. My boss in work does it all the time.
Each time they do something for you, you can expect them to ask back more, than they gave. With them also deciding, how and when will you pay your "debt".
Seems like the drama attracts them. They need to be seen as the hero. The day to day drudgery of caring doesn't have any appeal. Thank you for adding some details and dimension to this.
Depending on the situation, when they do that, it's so obviously delusional and out of character that they foolishly expose themselves all on their own. They're total clowns. 🤡🤡
Indeed
🎯 once again Danish Sir I promise you can Break them down and put them on Blast may The Higher power be with you all🙏
Stellar! Also please protect any valuables. When you are vulnerable during health care so are valuable items. Meaning any of your personal item no matter how small or large is fair game. They are angry the have to care for you and cannot help themselves. It is a child in need of attention 💯 of the time, and when you are the one getting attention at the moment by being cared for they seethe.
This true. My relative does this. She wants everyone in her pocket. Very good light in exposing the truth about narcissists!
Thank you Danish because this was the narc I was with
I am desparately waiting for your video.
What you say is exactly match my issue,i can feel much better
My narcissistic father pretended to care when my husband died by showing up for the funeral. It was all a facade. A few days after the funeral he came at me again with his lies and poison when I was in the throes of grief. He’s a scum bag.
That's terrible.. They truly are scum bags. You should LEAVE him
@@aali-in6lc he is my father and I have gone NO CONTACT
@@aali-in6lc I feel for you !!! My father abused me every way BUT sexually. He’s scum and so is yours !! Damn them for treating us this way !!
They are worried that you may not be able to attend to there needs if you are sick.
Yes, I've seen this many times but hadn't realised. I've educated myself with your posts since December and I can now clearly see through him.
Like I mentioned recently, if he can travel 3,000 miles to see me as I was very sick but now I see it was for him to gain attention for himself and Bingo, it was VERY clear to see, looking back now.
I'm annoyed how gullible and vulnerable I was. I'm still in contact with him but my relationship is completely different now. I'm rather good now if I can say so myself👍
Thanks Danish!
Your teachings are helping me to take care of me!!
I am glad to know that
You hit the nail on the head. My ex (narcissist number one) is "showing compassion" for me, while I'm agonizing over my son (narcissist number two). He does this by telling me what to do. I am feeling homicidal.
EXACTLY That's how my church pastor did to me 👀👀😱😱. !!!
When they are no longer getting their grade A supply from you. Most know normal people are happy for a listening ear, or help. Then you hear from others that YOU did not tell your situation at the moment, and those people ( usually mutual friends of your family,) truly help and care for you while the narc sits back and enjoys . Especially if you have inconsistent or consistent health problems, whether they are life threatening to you or not. But the narc won’t physically help. I quit talking to that narc about my health and anything else important. ( Family member.) She sends so and so to help while she goes about her day as if nothing happened. If you can’t drive like me , they love stuff like that. Once you find out who has high narc traits or is a narc, and you thought you can’t go no contact, go no contact or minimize contact. They take that as you dependent on their good graces. I know first hand.
Perfect timing on this one! I got out 3 months ago, although we're not no contact because we have children. Just as I'm starting to get calm and relaxed after 25 years of psychological abuse, i got diagnosed this week with an agressive cancerous tumor. My not-yet-ex is springing into action to show me, himself and the world that he's the most loving and supportive of husbands. I have to keep reminding myself that it would be the best possible outcome for him if I die. He could keep his money and his reputation in tact.
I pray for healing for you In Jesus name please join live prayer NSPPD #7amfireprayers so many people healed by God’s grace
New to your channel.
I like the way you get to the point.
And not a lot of word salad.
Thank you
Peace 💕🇺🇲
Bingo! My ex “friend” showed me tremendous care/support for 6 mos leading up to a major surgery that I was terrified of going thru alone during covid times when hospitals were overwhelmed; no visitors allowed, etc As soon as I received my surgery date they disappeared 👻 only to attempt to hoover me 3 months later, as if it was no big deal. to weaponize someone’s illness like that is pure 👿 and you can’t convince me it was not premeditated - the comments here are so validating to read. It’s obvious they only showed me concern to appear oh so altruistic to others and seem like a kind person when they’re not. Needless to say this A-hole is no longer in my life. To add even more insult, this individual had gone thru similar health struggles/surgery similar to mine!!! WTF!!! Really disgusting behavior. I could NEVER do this to someone.
@@jbrown2908 wow cruel & callous-that sums up a narcissist. sorry you went thru that & sorry for your loss 🤗 ❤️
In the beginning because he was studying me to find out how to use my personality to his advantage
To look good in the eyes of the family so it discredits your opinions. I’ve noticed this in my situation.
When my dad was dying he was caring and supportive. After my dad died he used it all against me. He got worse because he saw a side of me to exploit
They try to care to show that they are also empath person
For a very little while, then it’s all about the burden on them. And they look for someone, anyone to dump it on.
My narc praises me,
Cares for me,
Respects me in front of ithers.
But bitter truth is that,indide the wall he neither cares nor respect me .
To show his repo ,false imge he pretends to be as good human being as possible.
💯 Truth Thank you
I love your thumbnail pics. ❤️
Virtue signalling……….🙄gosh I’m such a good person, look at me caring🙄
At the very last second to make themselves look better
Thank you
Thanks.
They care to safe gaurd their reputation!!!!
U r correct..
Mainly for "Supply", I would think.
They needed supply. They were fearful of the consequences for allowing death. They were embarrassed about exposure. Narcissistic fog from white wash is not genuine redemption.
Iam just saying every thing you say is true it is AMAZING HoW YOU KNOW THANK YOU
Yeah, they care with words and in public, their actions are the exact opposite of their sentiments.
It hurts me to know m trapped with such a person
Get out quickly from that trap!! 🪤...in silence not telling about your intentions..plan for your future secret place without saying anything to anyone!! They always have "flying monkies"working for them!
Planning my escape in april... Not giving any details to anyone... Only a couple of friends of mine know... I pray i will wl succeed
He would pretend on the speaker phone at work. Making others think he’s. Good person while talking to me.
Danish your episode very very helpful for me to lead a happy life by setting boundaries with my npd partner.. By co parenting... Thank🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 and blessing s from Indian state kerala
The devil is real...
The more is needed from my mother the more severe the betrayal
But I hav nver had my Narc care during crisis til date ever cud b bcos i was stil not married den n none of my or his relatives wer around to praise him or watever
Hi Danish,
thank you so much for your videos which helped me a lot to understand narcissists disorder
My English is poor so sry if i wrote bad & i hope to understand me
Danish please can you make a video about the narcissist and his friends, i want to understand
I will tell you my story to better understand my question
I met a man on an online game, he is from Germany, I am from France, at first he started to charm me, or doing love bombing, when I got attached to him he started to move away, doing a discard, he doesn't answer my calls, absent on whatsap, he came back after 2 months,
I told him I loved him, he said no that's not what I want, i don’t know ahat is love, I'm only looking for friendship, he said he doesn’t want a lover only friend but once he showed me his research on a dating site.
I told to myself ok let’s being friend maybe he will change his idea. Unfortunatlly no, he did : trangulation,
Gaslighting by saying I am crazy
discard,
devalutation,
hoovering
and now discard again
He likes latinas girls, he has a friend from Peru, as he said he knows her aroud 10 years, he never meet her, only making video call, chatting via watsap or telegram, she is teaching online German language, I asked him if he loves her, he told me no she is like my little sister
I realized that, when he is talking to her he ignoring my messages, that’s hurt me a lot, i told it to him don’t do that to me I am not an option, or a 5th wheel. And he repeat it maybe 10 times and when i talk to him he started being in anger, treating me by jealous i told him no, I am not jealous but that means you don’t respect me, you devaluated me.. he said you should work on this, if you can’t handle it
For his Peruvian friend sometimes he did her online courses even if he is exausted, even if it’s very late, (cause the difference time zone) and that he can do it for month to 2 months for free only helping her
My question is, does he loves her ? why he does her job, even if he is exaucted, even if it very late (courses start at 23h to 2h00)
Sometimes i told to myself his friend is narcisist too cause she is manipulated him by doing her job for free
I hope you understand my request , i wonder to know does he love her?
why do you want to be part of this?- you are seeing everything--- save yourself more headache/heartache and stay away from this type of person
No, a narcisssist can never Love. It's not their nature, they only love themselves. He will end up cheating on the other girls. it's for sexual pleasure and for CONTROL. PLEASE BE CAREFUL!
@@ahershey8523 it's really hard to accept this, i know i should stop this friendship i want only to know why he's nice with the Peruvian friend and he isn't with me 😔
Danish, can u enlighten us on narcissistic relationship with witchcraft.... Do they indulge with that... I doubt my mom gets it done against me....
I had a Protestant friend who was a narcissist. Of course in that community Protestants believe there is a crisis because of the unsaved people. My friend would invite lots of people to church but I noticed he would always make sure to position them in the seat which showed on the big screen to the entire congregation that he was present and with a new friend he brought to church. 😇😂. If his guest wants to sit somewhere else he would refuse and insist that they sit in that seat because the cameras 🤣
So you're Catholic huh?
Did this video resonate with you? Let me know in my comments, see you in the next videos comments 😳
I think he wanted to make me think he was like Mother Teresa.
Surprise to me
Thank you Danish it’s all a Big Lie They Don’t Give A Dam But She Want let Him Go. An I Think He Really don’t know what to do it like Brain Wash everything you say is though it like you know who we are you be dead on Thank u again
Amber Heard...
Thank you