Avoid These Mistakes: Unsuccessful Move to India | NRI

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  • Опубліковано 28 жов 2024
  • Deva went to Ireland in 2006 as a healthcare professional, spent 12 years before deciding to return to his home town in India. After spending about 1 year in India, the family decided to return back to Ireland as it was not the right move for them. Deva talks about the reasons for unsuccessful relocation, his business in India, life in Ireland, family, kids adjustment and much more.
    Here’s some of the topics we covered:
    Background
    Reason for moving back
    Running business in India
    What went wrong with the move
    Career Transition
    Kids adjustment
    Any advice for future aspirants?
    Kids life back in Ireland
    Anything that we haven’t covered?
    ‪@deltaalpha365‬
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 245

  • @vsk6549
    @vsk6549 3 місяці тому +33

    He is such a honest man. And i agree with lot of the things he is saying

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  3 місяці тому +1

      Yes he is. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @vanshikashrivastava9560
    @vanshikashrivastava9560 Місяць тому +23

    13:10 a good school in India may not be the right school for kids comimg from outside.... Very well said. Awesome😊

  • @nuranichandra2177
    @nuranichandra2177 8 місяців тому +22

    This was to be expected. In fact others in a similar situation who say that they had no issues returning to India are often lying.

    • @rahulmiyan
      @rahulmiyan 7 місяців тому

      Bhai tu bada negative admi hai , har Vedio pe comment karke u just try to prove a point that returning to India doesn’t make sense and is a bad decision. Bro chill maar!

    • @a2zsolar582
      @a2zsolar582 3 місяці тому +1

      Not right always depends how you plan

    • @satyanveshi1939
      @satyanveshi1939 2 місяці тому +1

      ​@@a2zsolar582 Plan..... plan saala 10000 rs ka suit pehenta Hai akal 10 Kaise ki Bhi Nahin hai

    • @raksi004
      @raksi004 2 місяці тому +1

      I'm in the same boat. Back from Canada after 7 years. My kids are young, the elder one was 6 when we came back. She had done her preschool and kindergarten in Canada. She has gotten used to the new place and school very well. Of course she had some minor challenges for HW, school culture and other cultural shocks. Yes, there will be a few good things you would miss and a few great things you will pick from here. We are trying to be a better guide to the kids to navigate this journey.

    • @a2zsolar582
      @a2zsolar582 2 місяці тому

      @satyanveshi1939 we moved to india after staying in USA for 12 yrs. My kids are us citizens, but now they are well settled in india.

  • @vipashapmehta
    @vipashapmehta 6 місяців тому +20

    Such an honest, open and frank conversation - kudos to Deva Sir!!! Thank you @desireturn for this episode....

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  6 місяців тому +1

      Thanks a lot for watching and sharing your thoughts

    • @danieljohnson3515
      @danieljohnson3515 2 місяці тому

      Agree, very honestly said, learning for others.

  • @sandhyachavali
    @sandhyachavali Місяць тому +5

    I can relate to you on so many levels. Please don’t feel guilty or bad. Sometimes in life things happen which are out of our hands, you did your best ❤ please stop feeling guilty

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому +1

      Thanks a lot for the kind words

  • @mad_in_2020
    @mad_in_2020 5 місяців тому +22

    So brave of him to say that some of his decisions regarding relocation didn't work.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  5 місяців тому +3

      Yes. It's very rare that people would be willing to share their not so successful stories publicly.

  • @eventhorizon1
    @eventhorizon1 2 місяці тому +11

    Great sharing! I feel everything he shared. The cleanliness factor needs a lot of improvement in India. I have similar anxiety to go back. So waiting for son to complete his schooling.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @radhakrishna476
    @radhakrishna476 8 місяців тому +9

    so sorry to hear about kids experience in indian schools...hope the condition improves...

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  8 місяців тому

      Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts. Kids are good back in Ireland as Deva mentioned in the video

  • @snehadesai8424
    @snehadesai8424 2 місяці тому +6

    Thank you Deva for sharing your honest experience. When you said that your child did not like to go to the bathroom in school and hold it till he comes home, it reminded me of something and I can totally relate it. I was on long vacation in India during my second maternity leave and older child was 3 yr, he is hyperactive so we can’t keep him home all day. So we decided to send him to nearest international nursery for 3-5 hrs for 1-2months in mumbai, so that he would learn something there and play with other Indian children. We had made him diaper free before traveling to India. But there in Nursery, he would not tell staff/care taker that he wants to go to washroom, even when they ask him every other hour. He did potty once in pants so they told us to send him in diaper. Making child diaper free is itself big achievement for the child and parent so I didn’t want to revert our efforts, but we didn’t have choice so we sent him in diaper next to days. Then again on another day he did not tell the staff and did potty in pants, I reached there and the lady had just taken him to the bathroom to clean him, then I rush to the bathroom, I told her that I will clean him bcos he is more comfortable with me. That time I saw the condition of bathroom, the floor was wet, potty seat was wet, there was small bucket under the leaked tap in the bathroom that is overflowing so the bathroom is never dry, toilet seat was wet and there is no toilet paper to clean that seat before seating on it and surprisingly she was making him seat on adults commode seat. Then I realized why he might not be telling about pee and potty. That day I asked him politely when we were on the way to the home why don’t you tell them, you tell us at home, is it bcos toilet seat is wet? He said yes but he also said that toilet seat is big for me, I am bit afraid of it. When I asked the staff why don’t you use child potty seat, she told me that I told him that I stand near to you when you are seating on potty seat, just hold my hands but my child was not used to this. So I gave portable children potty seat which I ordered on Amazon next day and told them to use it for him. I was not expecting this kind of hygiene in a children nursery school which was reputed in that area.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your experience

    • @eloquent-code
      @eloquent-code Місяць тому

      Indian culture is no one cares as long as it does not become their problem.

    • @arcpd123
      @arcpd123 День тому

      i really fail to understand why indians dont raise the standards...why can we keep the bathrooms clean...even when they are charging such hefty amount of fees ..

  • @ApArsenal
    @ApArsenal Місяць тому +9

    Such a great interview. The interviewer was a good listener and gave good oppoetunity for the guest to speak.
    The guest spoke really really well. Was down to earth, is humble when he speaks about his mistakes, takes responsibility etc.
    Life is a complicated game. It gets more complicated when you move countries. At the same time for those who dont move out of India, the life isnt easy as well.
    What everyone should understand is that this is this mans story, his thoughts and reality. It may or may not apply to all, so dont be a monday morning quarter back.
    All the best to the guest and his family and to the interviewers youtube channel!

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому +2

      Thanks a lot putting the thoughts very well. Appreciate the feedback.

  • @jayvidhun6988
    @jayvidhun6988 2 місяці тому +8

    Excellent interview and viewpoints.
    My own experience. I grew up in UK and had to move to India at the age of 8 because my father moved to the Middle East and there was no good education available in the town we lived in. I did not want to leave and remember when the plane left London I resolved to return one day.
    I grew up with my grandparents and saw parents once or twice a year.
    We took the bus to school and back home like regular kids. I had an accent and didn’t know Tamil but there were couple of teachers who supported and helped me get through the first year. I eventually made good friends and adapted to the culture including punishment etc. eventually excelled in school went to medical college in Chennai and then moved to the US.
    In hindsight I had great schooling and college life in India but never forgot that I wanted to go back.
    I’ve lived in the US for about 25 years now and my older daughter just started college here. I can’t imagine moving them as this is their home now.
    I think it all ended well but it has left me with some separation anxiety and was hard to let my daughter go to college in a different state.
    Good luck!

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks a lot for sharing your story and how it shaped you as a parent. Would you be open to share your story on the podcast?

    • @MilesToGo78
      @MilesToGo78 2 місяці тому

      You are behaving like a typical Indian dad. Last week, in an office call, an American guy told how his daughter preparing for a final say good bye with all things packed up. He was very casual. Even other lady also talked about her kitchen filled with her daughter’s things that are ready to go.

    • @jayvidhun6988
      @jayvidhun6988 Місяць тому +1

      @@DesiReturn thank you. I’ve never thought about that. I enjoy your videos and if you feel that my viewpoint would be beneficial to someone I’m happy to share my experience.

    • @jayvidhun6988
      @jayvidhun6988 Місяць тому

      @@MilesToGo78 yes. I’m a typical Indian dad :)

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      @@jayvidhun6988 Thats great. Can you please send a note to info @ desireturn .com or on Insta at desireturn.official we will take it from there Thanks again

  • @noreendsouza8341
    @noreendsouza8341 8 місяців тому +6

    Honest and Excellent interview.

  • @cosmologist007
    @cosmologist007 8 днів тому +1

    Kudos to Deva for his honesty. It is so difficult to be vulnerable and to admit our own mistakes. Wish @deva all the best

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  8 днів тому

      Yes for sure. Grateful for Deva to be so candid with his story on the platform to help others

  • @RajagopalSankaranarayanan
    @RajagopalSankaranarayanan 2 місяці тому +6

    Sir inga ellarume (at least some way or other) Financial migrant thaan.. Thanks for being very candid on your reflection.. it is helping me a lot and giving a different perspective

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому +2

      Yes Deva is very open and candid to share his journey. Glad to know that it’s helpful for you and look at it a different way perspective. 🙏

  • @sagarbasutkar1901
    @sagarbasutkar1901 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you @desireturn for posting this interview video, immensely helpful for parents who are living their NRI life and planning to go back to India soon!! Thanks so much!!

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      You are very welcome. Have you checked out our other videos?

  • @v_r009
    @v_r009 2 місяці тому +53

    Bringing your family from a Western country to a Tier 2- Tier 3 city is a big mistake. Get your family to a top tier city and get admission to an international school

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому +4

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. Kids adaptation is very critical

    • @sushiljain2123
      @sushiljain2123 2 місяці тому

      You are such a fool to again put them in IS to convert them to wokes

    • @jayvidhun6988
      @jayvidhun6988 2 місяці тому +13

      Excellent interview and viewpoints.
      My own experience. I grew up in UK and had to move to India at the age of 8 because my father moved to the Middle East and there was no good education available in the town we lived in. I did not want to leave and remember when the plane left London I resolved to return one day.
      I grew up with my grandparents and saw parents once or twice a year.
      We took the bus to school and back home like regular kids. I had an accent and didn’t know Tamil but there were couple of teachers who supported and helped me get through the first year. I eventually made good friends and adapted to the culture including punishment etc. eventually excelled in school went to medical college in Chennai and then moved to the US.
      In hindsight I had great schooling and college life in India but never forgot that I wanted to go back.
      I’ve lived in the US for about 25 years now and my older daughter just started college here. I can’t imagine moving them as this is their home now.
      I think it all ended well but it has left me with some separation anxiety and was hard to let my daughter go to college in a different state.
      Good luck!

    • @Rainbow_1981
      @Rainbow_1981 2 місяці тому +4

      Yes very true. During Covid time me n my were supposed to move but it didn't happen. However we got admission in international school there and got apartment to rent in a community with all facilities/ it had mall /club house with all facilities-gym,restaurant, pharmacy, laundry dry cleaning/ multi specialty hospital/ / good school but we didn't take admission in that school .point I'm trying to say is go to a community with all facilities.
      very important to think through/ get family on board/ discuss various options/. Also take your family to India every year so they experience the culture/ know more about how life there is actually.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      @@Rainbow_1981 Very valid points. Thanks for sharing your inputs.

  • @abiarun9578
    @abiarun9578 2 місяці тому +3

    This is the pbm .he is just sharing his experience and his thoughts.but,we willl make to put everything in how we want.

  • @Neelsworld2022
    @Neelsworld2022 8 місяців тому +9

    Great video, Very nice hearted man with clear vision . Just my honest opinion ,Had you settled down in metro city like Mumbai or Bangalore your experience would have been little different. I could be wrong.

  • @KG-ho7bj
    @KG-ho7bj 2 місяці тому +4

    Wow very honest story, oftentimes we go through such rollercoaster but most people don’t share real emotions

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      True. Not lot of people are open to share on a public platter

  • @ritskohli5769
    @ritskohli5769 8 місяців тому +4

    Thanks for sharing your views.

  • @SJ-knows
    @SJ-knows Місяць тому +1

    Absolutely loved the Interview and the honesty with which Deva touched upon the topic. As someone who lives in Ireland, i could absolutely relate with the fact that we all want to move back to India at some point.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Glad that you liked the interview. Yes Deva is very honest and open to share his story.

  • @PratyushMishra99
    @PratyushMishra99 2 місяці тому +4

    Absolutely loved it, thank you for sharing such an honest and real experience

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Glad you liked it. Kudos to Deva for sharing candid experience. Feel free to share it with others who can benefit from the content

  • @khanbasheer1363
    @khanbasheer1363 Місяць тому +3

    It is quite a big challenge for kids to move from one place to another. Life in the west makes you soft. Kids and teenagers in the West are not mentally strong enough to survive in tough situations. I think making kids face hardship and tough life is essential for their mental toughness, and India is just the right place for it. There is a reason why depression is so high in the West. Consider a situation where you have no other option but to live in India. Don't you live? I bet you will live, survive, and also become successful in the future.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    • @jeetlahkar894
      @jeetlahkar894 Місяць тому

      Its a double edged sword my friend. This kind of so-called toughness can make or break a kid.

    • @shaivamuthaiya2015
      @shaivamuthaiya2015 Місяць тому

      I dont know many students in west commiting suicide for getting low marks in exams ? What BS u pushing

  • @TulasiThentu
    @TulasiThentu 2 місяці тому +1

    @desi returns you are doing a great job. We recently moved to finland and were very confused about future. These podcasts help a lot to people like us.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your feedback. Glad to know that information is helpful. Good luck!

  • @dipakoza3626
    @dipakoza3626 2 місяці тому +5

    Reallly reply a good lesion and eye opening try story -- thanks ..a lesions to learn for all Desi returns interested to return back with good luck

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. A lot we can learn from not so successful journeys and what can be done

  • @raksi004
    @raksi004 2 місяці тому +3

    Whats important to note here is this the thought of RE immigration is immense is everyones though. I started thinking if this is a basic instinct of living things when i found every animal or bird always returns back to its origins when the sky is clear no matter how difficult the journey would be.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. very well written and you gave a different perspective

  • @baluakshay
    @baluakshay 2 місяці тому +2

    Thank you @Deva for your honest feedback.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts

  • @aasthalovesudit
    @aasthalovesudit Місяць тому +1

    Thanks for sharing the journey of an NRI navigating through the delimas.

  • @sudhirmantha6339
    @sudhirmantha6339 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for sharing this. This is very valuable feedback.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Glad you liked it. Thanks

  • @srinivasapattigilli6020
    @srinivasapattigilli6020 2 місяці тому +4

    Moving to India even if tier 1 should not include kids born and brought up in west. Person and Spouse can move if needed, once the kids stand on their feet, at least college. Education system is quite different in India, its not just about improvement, please there accept it that way. We cannot accept it that is it. Also, there so many subtle disturbances in India, we need connections for so many small things to get done. Its not the case in western countries. People can say we will miss our culture, but that fine culture whih we have seen back in 90s at least is very remotely present.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thank you for sharing your perspectives and some valid points for families to ponder on before making the big decision

    • @MilesToGo78
      @MilesToGo78 2 місяці тому +2

      You used the same education system and able to go abroad with that. Now you complain 😂😂😂. West has best education but that comes with a huge cost. Will end up huge identity crisis like ABC. If you live in a country better to assimilate 100% or move back soon.

    • @srinivasapattigilli6020
      @srinivasapattigilli6020 2 місяці тому

      @@MilesToGo78 Sir, I did not complain on the system. I was saying it will be tough kids abroad to adjust in that model. Please read with open mind

    • @srinivasapattigilli6020
      @srinivasapattigilli6020 2 місяці тому

      And I did not say rather west or east has best educational system. Both have their flaws, it’s the parents responsibility to guide their kid where they seem fit. We cannot just push on education system and wash hands

    • @srinivasapattigilli6020
      @srinivasapattigilli6020 2 місяці тому +1

      Moving back to India a personal choice and it will not fit for all. If one is content they can live anywhere peacefully need not be India

  • @raghusub1
    @raghusub1 Місяць тому +1

    Thank you for sharing all your experiences and being so candid
    I really appreciate you sharing your experience.

  • @funfacts9191
    @funfacts9191 Місяць тому +2

    Nice discussion! The timing of the move was not in your favor. Covid was unpredictable. In addition if anyone wants to move back ensure your child is less than 5 . Once they cross 5 you cannot make the move because your child will not able to adapt.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks. Each kid is different and in general before the kid moves to middle school, it could still work. But earlier the better

  • @venugopaulnarayanan8853
    @venugopaulnarayanan8853 Місяць тому +1

    I am Nri and my kids adapted to india better than me in vaccation..Infact this is my son's first visit after birth..They could adapt to india easily because i make sure that they talk native language at home,eat indian food at home,understand cultural heritage and mingle with indian community in country i live in..In schools they learn how to adapt to the western culture..They are multicultural.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @KiranMaharjan-ex5qc
    @KiranMaharjan-ex5qc Місяць тому +1

    Nicely explain how culture adjustment is hard to do. Sometime minor things can be major hinderance.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts and glad you liked the discussion

  • @vikramjayanth2289
    @vikramjayanth2289 2 місяці тому +10

    Trying to reverse diabetics in India is a great idea for health (business models). However, for doctors/pharma guys reversing diabetics is not a lucrative concept and does not give them enough money. People in India have to be convinced that diabetics is a reversible disease

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    • @dilipv12
      @dilipv12 Місяць тому

      thats why he went back . money is main priority no matter what

  • @JohnDoe-nt6cv
    @JohnDoe-nt6cv Місяць тому

    Very articulate and well said sir.. God bless you...

  • @Adarsh1024
    @Adarsh1024 2 місяці тому +5

    International schools in big cities usually smooth out things for kids.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Yes it would help a lot for kids. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

    • @MilesToGo78
      @MilesToGo78 2 місяці тому

      We have only 5 -10 cities on that level. Anybody from MP/Bihar/UP and have that choice? If everyone moves to those 10 cities then how can sustain? It’s a mindset that’s all

  • @roja7426
    @roja7426 2 місяці тому +2

    I disagree with teachers beating kids to learn. I grew up in a country where this took place as a kid at 5 yrs old I hated it. I was terrified of school. In high school we were beaten and that was a relief.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      True. Lot has changed. Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @bharath700i
    @bharath700i Місяць тому +1

    Thanks for giving us honest opinions. I this will give different perspectives, what can be expected and weighs in all the possibilities and weighs in what’s important for one and make decisions.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      True and thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @sridharv3903
    @sridharv3903 6 місяців тому +4

    Great interview and kudos to Deva for being bold enough to share the challenges which usually people are shy to ahare or sugarcoat it to sound smart. This was candid one. However, Im curious to know which city or town in India they had this experience so it can be a eye opener for others.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  6 місяців тому +1

      Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts. Yes kudos to Deva for being open to share his family experiences. The family moved to Kanyakumari ( around 16:50)

    • @kumarc123
      @kumarc123 2 місяці тому

      @@DesiReturn. Could you please share I info with Deva. From same place he is have like mindset. Thanks in advance

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      @@kumarc123 Please reach out to us at info @ desireturn .com for on insta handle desireturn.official

  • @flowers5947
    @flowers5947 2 місяці тому +3

    Every parent says that they will go back once kids are independent of them, but no one goes. They are so much attached to kids that they want to see their grandchildren grow up near them or close to them if not in the same house. So they missed the chance to go back for life unless parents go back before their children go to school.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. As you said, it becomes more difficult as kids grow up.

    • @srinone5245
      @srinone5245 2 місяці тому

      this is exactly what scares me, I really want to brace my self and do my move in coming two years, rather moving unplanned. I really do not want to regret my decision.

  • @sandhyachavali
    @sandhyachavali Місяць тому +2

    Fact- I’ve found both the partners need to agree on settling in a foreign place otherwise both struggle throughout life with one of the partners not feeling content or happy with the situation

  • @sndppanjala1725
    @sndppanjala1725 Місяць тому +1

    We just moved to Hyderabad in June. Both my kids are US citizens 11 and 8. Will see how it goes. I have been in US since 2006.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому +2

      Thanks for sharing your move. We have lot of people in our whatsapp group who moved to Hyd. Good luck with the move.

    • @sndppanjala1725
      @sndppanjala1725 Місяць тому

      Can you add me to the group?

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      @@sndppanjala1725 Please complete and follow the instructions of this form docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfi6V6L4Ipg6Xze_Qm1IxYEPUPCfAPBc1DzFYnNv-j6KWxjrw/viewform

    • @tuftoffy
      @tuftoffy Місяць тому

      @sndppanjala1725 - Hi! Sooner or later, you will move back to the US. If you don’t move, you will send your kids for the undergrad and eventually you will join them😃! India is not as nice as it used to be like 30 or 40 years ago!

  • @ms-tv4zo
    @ms-tv4zo 2 місяці тому +6

    Great podcast avinash. It helps a lot of people. Keep it going. And all the best to Deva as well. I am one of that guy who has been living abroad since 12 years. Planning to make a move back to India in coming years. I am fortunate that we safeguarded my father’s agriculture lands , even though we had some rough time doing shrimp culture few years ago. We are just waiting for the lands to to convert into layouts. As soon as I could see the developments around our fields, we are planing to move back to andhra. Meanwhile me and wife are working so hard to save some money to buy rental properties so that monthly expenses are taken care of. That’s our plan. Hoping to be true in next couple of years. Fingers crossed *

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks a lot for the feedback! Please subscribe and share with others who can benefit from the content. Glad to know that you have a strong plan and executing on it. Good luck !!!

  • @MilesToGo78
    @MilesToGo78 2 місяці тому +3

    Living in india is better than living in Ireland for 9 months with snow/winter in a year and it’s similar in many western countries. US has exceptions in South and west coast. Only north and midwestern corn belt have the winter menace

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому +2

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Weather is one important aspect

    • @jeetlahkar894
      @jeetlahkar894 Місяць тому +1

      Seasonal weather should not be a reason you want to make a move

    • @notjustanyuser
      @notjustanyuser Місяць тому

      Winter is meant to be cold. In India some places have stopped having seasonal rotation. it is summer all year round.

  • @ravishankeryadav6148
    @ravishankeryadav6148 2 місяці тому +5

    90% of NRIs will relate 👍

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @humayunmailbox
    @humayunmailbox Місяць тому +1

    Amazing life journey. Very nice person.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks a lot. Yes Deva is very honest.

  • @Rk-dq8yc
    @Rk-dq8yc Місяць тому +1

    very good father!!

  • @externalbiconsultant2054
    @externalbiconsultant2054 Місяць тому +1

    Don't say India is India. It depends where you are from India. Kanyakumari is a peaceful place near nature. But Chennai is a hellhole with no water , terrible heat. Though they both are in TN.

  • @flowers5947
    @flowers5947 2 місяці тому

    Why should there be consideration for rent change in India? Do you expect same in other countries, once you sign the lease? If you are using the premises and signed the lease, you need to pay rent, no matter what.

  • @sundark6503
    @sundark6503 2 місяці тому +1

    Good discussion . Candid 👍🏻

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thank you for watching

  • @rashmikolluru
    @rashmikolluru Місяць тому

    I could sense lack of planning, remember failing to plan is planning to fail. India is the country of birth yet once uprooted, it's a big move and can't be taken for granted. Even in Ireland the Irish wouldn't be spared for delinquency in rental payments.

  • @swamiraman4588
    @swamiraman4588 Місяць тому

    Many things regarding schools are true. It is hard for children to adjust.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  • @KrishnaseshuT
    @KrishnaseshuT Місяць тому +1

    Love this guy

  • @TheBobbyy
    @TheBobbyy Місяць тому +2

    An honest suggestion - please, please don’t fall for the reels on India. Reality is much different. Sometimes I feel like the situation has worsened even further than what it was 20 years back. As population is growing, everything is becoming scarcer, and there’s even more competition for anything and everything. Unlike what this guest says, I would say, DON’T burn the bridges. Keep your home in other country and keep traveling to India for your business or whatever you do.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому +1

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Hopefully people are not making decisions based on the reels but spend some time understand the realities in India. Everyone has different experience/perspective, some the developments in India are real. It's up to individual what is more important and make the right decision.

    • @IITTPPEEDD
      @IITTPPEEDD Місяць тому +1

      Very rightly said. I go to india every year, and have noticed the same.

  • @arunqp
    @arunqp 2 місяці тому +1

    shared real facts thanks bro

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @sampathkumar-gn9jk
    @sampathkumar-gn9jk 8 місяців тому +1

    sorry to hear

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  8 місяців тому +1

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. It takes courage to talk through this and appreciate Deva sharing his story

  • @MikeR-p2b
    @MikeR-p2b 6 місяців тому +1

    Loved the conversation!

  • @kumarc123
    @kumarc123 2 місяці тому +3

    @DesiReturn please share my information with Deva. I’m having similar thoughts live in US and from same location geographically

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for reaching out. Can you please send a note to info @ desireturn .com

  • @etutlf4176
    @etutlf4176 Місяць тому +3

    Cant expect India to match up to a Western country!

  • @zeesworld3371
    @zeesworld3371 Місяць тому

    Ya but if u tell someone or ask someone or give even lit bit advice in real life about how it will be difficult ppl take it as oh it’s my decision.. than come backs 2-3 years later saying I am gone move back.. specially I seen this with lot of ppl .. who has lived in USA for 10years n taking their kids wife to India n coming back

  • @jagshari
    @jagshari 2 місяці тому +2

    Smart guy, he knows where the problem is and kept only referring to kids in the decision process and their adaptation to new environment and has kept it sugar coated to keep us life from trouble. Finally he spilled the beans.

    • @josumiyan
      @josumiyan 2 місяці тому +5

      He never relocated completely and didn't hide anything. So, your reply is not completely correct. You have to allow the natural flow of thought when someone speaks.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      True Deva was candid with his conversation.

  • @rajalakshmisundaresan9623
    @rajalakshmisundaresan9623 2 місяці тому +1

    Good narration. Thanks.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thank you. Glad you liked the episode. Please check out others.

  • @Bakrolio
    @Bakrolio Місяць тому

    If you are a family oriented person and having grand kids under 10, my advice to all not to move out always anywhere. I am 70 and retired but will wait next 5-7 years before making any decisions to moving away from my grand kids.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @gatemanor
    @gatemanor Місяць тому +1

    Hi. What is Deva diabetes channel name.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Can you please send a note to info @ desireturn .com so we can put you in touch with Deva.

  • @extraaedge8113
    @extraaedge8113 Місяць тому +1

    I know many people who came back to India permanently their children adjusted well to this life style...foreign land is always a foreign land ...so bring up ur Children the way u were brought up in india...and never give up ur culture .....just because u r on a foreign land u don't ever become them, let it be any country for that matter be roman when in Rome but not in ur mother land.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  • @padmaPadma-bw1lh
    @padmaPadma-bw1lh Місяць тому

    These looks as problems as they are grown up in US and people in india may be common as they adapt and adjust to the things around

  • @ManaliDesai-km1ph
    @ManaliDesai-km1ph 2 місяці тому +1

    Hi can I contact Deva on how he worked in ireland?

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Yes please send a note to us at info @ desireturn .con so we can provide contact details

  • @may091985
    @may091985 Місяць тому

    Rule of thumb whenever one plans to return to India, from a western country, do so before having kids or when kids are grown up enough for college, so the kids can continue their studies there, I feel it’s unfair for the kids at such a young age to change into cultural differences that’s so drastic when even full grown adults find it hard to assimilate themselves.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Familes with kids who are in primary school did adjust fine. But better to move when kids are still young and they are most flexible in the transition.

  • @puffythecutie7524
    @puffythecutie7524 2 місяці тому +8

    Moving to India is not greener grass. Reality on ground is very different...now I am planning to head out from India

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Would you be open to share your story on the podcast to help others. We want to provide factual/real information so people make right decision for their family.

    • @MilesToGo78
      @MilesToGo78 2 місяці тому +1

      @@puffythecutie7524 In india also there is huge difference between states. Moving back to BIMARU is really a challenge for a person who “escaped” from there.

    • @eloquent-code
      @eloquent-code Місяць тому

      There are pros and cons. One need to have right expectation and clarity of thoughts.

    • @luvsuneja
      @luvsuneja Місяць тому

      Not all BIMARU states are same. There are plenty of nice livable places in Rajasthan at least.

  • @colleencarvalho4970
    @colleencarvalho4970 14 днів тому

    You cannot have a discussion with kids in kinder whether to move back or not, you need to discuss with your spouse only. You are lucky you get the opportunity to move back and forth, very immature in making decisions

  • @geethav1693
    @geethav1693 Місяць тому

    Children with less attachment for parents live abroad, at old age they go back to India

    • @viktrancestudio6398
      @viktrancestudio6398 Місяць тому

      Not true. It’s not an attachment choice but there are several other factors like earning money , pursuing your career dreams etc

  • @VrkPeru-nw2uv
    @VrkPeru-nw2uv Місяць тому

    In my experience make sure your children are learning to read and write one Indian language. That will go a long way

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

  • @use.UR.intellect
    @use.UR.intellect Місяць тому

    For Indian Muslims to go back is a ?
    As watching news the situation is getting from bad to worse

  • @nairpraving
    @nairpraving Місяць тому

    let your kids graduate or go to university... then you csn come back and retire... enough money to live in India

  • @manuvns
    @manuvns 2 місяці тому +5

    Don’t return unless you have large sums of money and deep connection to the India 😂

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  • @siddhrajdhadhal8372
    @siddhrajdhadhal8372 Місяць тому

    Most nri dont have the means to live in western countries after a while , and they complain about shifting here

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Why no means to live in western countries after a while. Lot of people live and some come back for different reasons on their own wish.

  • @sundri21
    @sundri21 2 місяці тому +1

    30:30 I did not hear anything about his wife. What was her view?🤔 Wow after I posed he mentioned about her. 😂

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому

      Ok. Glad you got the information

  • @praba991ify
    @praba991ify Місяць тому +1

    if covid never happened he would have been fine

  • @SanaatanSatyaHai
    @SanaatanSatyaHai Місяць тому

    The entire discussion revolves around boasting about where he worked for a few years compared to India. You're just another economic refugee. Please, don't concern yourself with my country. We are here, actively working to fix it. It's a large nation, and change takes time. We can all see how well the West is handling Islamophobic rhetoric, where even getting treatment for a simple fever is a nightmare, with 50% of income going to taxes without receiving basic amenities like safety, healthcare, or protection from grooming gangs.

    • @urbanindianthoughts9011
      @urbanindianthoughts9011 Місяць тому

      saya a man who has never travelled abroad and lives on Bhakt Whatsapp.. as a true patriot I could say that some of the worst hospitals in Europe are as good as our best.

    • @vasu9381
      @vasu9381 Місяць тому

      @@urbanindianthoughts9011 Very funny to see your limited mind setup and call anyone that supports their country as "Bhakt." Get a life.

  • @avernushoyguy
    @avernushoyguy Місяць тому

    None with common sense would hesitate to use the opportunity to settle down in a civilised democratic and developed western country where people have good work life balance,better rights etc. The only downside in west is their HORRIBLE public health system. Anyway, I don't understand why someone woud have a problem with communicating in his mother tongue in India provided his/her parent taught it at home while living abroad and conversed at home in their mother tongue. PIO parents do no good to their children by speaking in English at home in English speaking countries. The only good that they would do their kids to improve their English skill in not speak to them in English and let them learn it from the native speakers at school.

  •  2 місяці тому +1

    So in other words you selfishly made the
    Decision?? Don’t blame the
    Schools … in western country there is a lot of
    RACISM… that will be worst foe your children than a little spanking! Also u can’t keep on leg in one boat and one in other !! Also it is not fair to leave your children with bunch of paid staff to take care of them … and blame Indian school… Are u telling me u did not even talk this whole transition with your wife ???! 😢

    • @eloquent-code
      @eloquent-code Місяць тому

      There are bad character everywhere. In India there will be more bad character people. You need to learn to avoid them or push back against them.

    • @venugopaulnarayanan8853
      @venugopaulnarayanan8853 Місяць тому

      Not exactly the kids who grow in western countries from childhood are accepted...The international students who come for higher studies and the kids who come in the middle are the ones affected..

  • @thilakawathy
    @thilakawathy 2 місяці тому

    The story is too long. Please cut short

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому +1

      Please utilize the chapters from youtube.

  • @ET-si7rl
    @ET-si7rl 2 місяці тому

    ❤agree

  • @starman923
    @starman923 Місяць тому

    Bhaarath is the BEST for Hindus

  • @venkatmanian2256
    @venkatmanian2256 Місяць тому

    Pretty dumb if you ask me , why would you relocate young children from the first world to a third world country. My kids don’t want us to even take them for vacation to India 😢. They will go to Cancun for the 10 th time but good luck putting them on a plane to India. I can take it and even feel fine after 2-3 weeks😅

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Each place has pros and cons. Kids adapt quickly when young. Glad to know that your family is happy abroad

    • @venkatmanian2256
      @venkatmanian2256 Місяць тому

      @@DesiReturn Thanks, I appreciate you doing this series. It would be good to also bring out some of the behavior patterns that can help make India better for all of us. And most of this does not even take large amount of money (like infrastructure). Simple things like obeying the traffic rules, no Honking unless there is life threatening reason! and as your guest rightly pointed out not beating our children in school! you can be in the first world with few changes in the behavior no need to blame the govt for everything. What are these values that we are missing, and how to inculcate that could be a great UA-cam series.

  • @akrishnan1382
    @akrishnan1382 2 місяці тому +4

    Firstly please do not glorify non resident Indians returning to the country as if they are doing a big sacrifice. Everyone has the right to decide according to their circumstances. Secondly life I developed countries is not a bed of roses. There are pluses and minuses if you live in India or abroad. Most of the NRis living abroad are having a mediocre life and their routine is restricted to work and home hardly anything left for their pleasure given the high taxes and high cost of living. Their saving has any value only if it's transferred to India due to the exchange rate difference. Many NRIs do not have sufficient money to even buy flight tickets to visit their parents once in two years. So please don't waste people's time by putting such videos and glory returning NRIs as they return purely for their personal reasons and not for the love of the country.

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  2 місяці тому +5

      As you said, each place has pros and cons and since its a personal decision, they need info so that one can make right decision. This is not about love of country or glorifying/sacrificing. Its purely information to be shared to help others

    • @jeetlahkar894
      @jeetlahkar894 Місяць тому

      I respect your views, but the jealousy is obviously visible.

    • @akrishnan1382
      @akrishnan1382 Місяць тому

      What is the jealousy you're talking about? I lived as NRI for nearly 3 decades and I returned to India for my own personal reasons. What's so great about returning to India. Those of you guys who think that living abroad is every Indian is aspiring for is the reason why many Indians live in very bad conditions despite having a comfortable life in India. Instead of being jealous I feel pity on them.

    • @malarm8038
      @malarm8038 Місяць тому

      Well said

  • @hopefromtokyo3783
    @hopefromtokyo3783 Місяць тому

    India eco system doesn’t support a honest business strategy the way people follow outside india. After loosing everything only we learn. 😂😂

    • @DesiReturn
      @DesiReturn  Місяць тому

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts

    • @jeetlahkar894
      @jeetlahkar894 Місяць тому

      Its not in the cultural DNA

  • @muralits246
    @muralits246 2 місяці тому +3

    Returning to their own city amd peoples is such major issue to NRIs. I feel it's very unfortunate for Bharat to have sons and daughters like them. Easy and lavish lives, deracination, insensitive to family's needs back in India, sense of false achievement working for western organizations and many other things fully creates mild hatred towards Bharat and also to their own parents and society. Cowardice and inability to accept Bharat makes them weak on their knees. Sad!

    • @Itsmebhuvaneshwari
      @Itsmebhuvaneshwari 2 місяці тому +5

      He is explaining his experience and thoughts. Please don't judge him. He has a certain expectation, he is trying to make sense and go from there and he is spot on on the schools. I am still scared of schools after all these years. They are like competition machines rather than a vehicle for learning.

    • @snair8989
      @snair8989 2 місяці тому +5

      You definitely are no asset to Bharat, your comment reeks of jealousy and judgement. You will find peace when u start being happy for others success and being more empathetic.

    • @Chimera2020
      @Chimera2020 2 місяці тому +7

      When you are sitting in a well, the well is the best place to live. Once you go out and see the meadow and come back to the well, then you have other view points. Good or bad, at least he has a view. You don’t , so don’t try to understand what he is saying, if you haven’t lived abroad

    • @kumar.193
      @kumar.193 2 місяці тому +1

      lol. Typical BJP know it all guy just like the party leaders. Instead of advising others try to have something basic like the bathroom clean in school. Its called hygiene.

    • @eloquent-code
      @eloquent-code Місяць тому

      Everyone work for their own interest.
      PM work so that he can enjoy the power and money. He don't care if 80% of people are below poverty line or 50% of Indian children are malnourished.
      All political party also work for the same as above.
      Businessman work for the same . His goal is to pay the mininum amount of salary and get most profit.
      Policeman also work for the same. If PM/Businessman/etc. tell him to beat a person dead He will gladly do it. This happened when Britisher were there and its the same now too.
      Britisher never killed anyone It was Indian killing Indian.
      Same with the Army Army is there to protect the PM/Business if the masses revolt. When It becomes to much army will give up though. Happened in Bangladesh recently.
      NRI goes outside to get better cities, quality of life and education for their children.
      NRI may come back because it might be better for them in the short term in India (They already have citizenship to other country just like kids of Politician and businessman.)

  • @kikachou7886
    @kikachou7886 8 місяців тому +2

    Lol. The reasoning is all absurd! Thousands of NRI"s with kids have no issue. Infact Kids adapt better than their parents.

    • @MikeR-p2b
      @MikeR-p2b 6 місяців тому +10

      He is sharing his experience, he makes sense kids not adjusting well due to culture shock.
      Kids are coming from Europe so it’s a big change for them.

    • @vsk6549
      @vsk6549 3 місяці тому +7

      He is very honest and lot of his issues are correct. Some if my friends faced the same issues and came back to US after staying in India for couple years

    • @abiarun9578
      @abiarun9578 2 місяці тому +5

      He is sharing his experience.it us not everyone's

    • @seeta5409
      @seeta5409 Місяць тому +1

      People who have never lived abroad will not be able to understand the challenges that parents face when they move back to India. Who could imagine that my daughter who was 3, would be petrified by the classroom maid's huge bindi, but it did. Thankfully, I could identify the problem and with the help of her very understanding class teacher (who incidentally had also moved back from the US) we could help my daughter. There were many more challenges which to others may seem trivial, but as mentioned by Deva it is very disturbing for the parents when they see their children struggling. Seeing a child being beaten in another school when we visited was shocking for us and we chose not to even consider that school. Many NRIs face problems, some talk about them, some don't probably because others cannot understand their problems.